Mariah Carey's All I Want for Christmas Is You (2017)

[bunniefuu]

MARIAH: I'm gonna tell you

the story of my first love.

It was cuddly with fuzzy ears and

a little wet nose, and, well,

more about that later.

It happened at Christmas time.

Hey, come on now.

I said, "It happened

at Christmas time."

MAN: Happy holidays!

MARIAH: That's more like if.

GIRL: What are you

getting from Santa?

MAN: Great to see you!

(BELL TOLLING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

MARIAH: Every Christmas,

I asked for a puppy to love,

and this Christmas,

I especially wanted one.

Hi, Mariah!

I like your dog.

Oh... Thank you.

Have you heard of the Community Charity

League fashion show we're putting on?

Mmm-hmm. I signed up

to do refreshments.

MARIAH: Of course

I had heard of it.

It was only the biggest

talk of the town.

Such a cool idea to raise

money for the pet shelter.

Fashion and friends.

Matching outfits

for you and your pet.

We're talking about

being in the show.

Really?

Oh, my gosh!

I would love to be in it!

Thank you so much!

Great. We're short

one girl with a dog.

Oh...

I don't have a dog.

Mmm, sorry.

We thought...

Wait!

I'm gonna have one soon.

I'm gonna ask for one

for Christmas.

Supercool!

Perfect!

Come meet us at school today

at 4:00 for rehearsal.

We are so excited for you

to be in the show with us.

Be on time!

Be on time!

MARIAH: Vicky and Grace were only the

coolest girls in my whole school.

I mean, these two

had it going on.

They were going places.

BRETT: (SCOFFS)

Good luck with that.

Mariah, why did

you tell them that?

Mom and Dad won't

let you have a dog.

MARIAH: My little brother

and sister, Brett and Beth.

So supportive.

(BRETT AND BETH LAUGHING)

They loved teasing me about

how much I wanted a dog

and how many times I had asked.

But they were right.

Who was I kidding?

I'd been asking for a puppy every

Christmas, every birthday, every...

You get the idea.

But my mom and dad

always said no.

To be fair,

my dad was allergic to dogs.

(HUMMING)

(DOG BARKING)

(SHRIEKS)

(SNEEZES)

MARIAH: I'm talking

really crazy allergic.

(LOUD SNEEZE)

(DOORBELL RINGS)

MARIAH:

And Mom was very, well...

She liked to keep

the house just so.

(VACUUM CLEANER WHIRRING)

(HUMMING)

Oh, honey, we're doing

all red and white this year.

MARIAH: Since Mom and Dad wouldn't

budge on letting me have a dog,

I went over their heads,

straight to the big guy.

We're talkin' Santa Claus.

Every year,

I put "puppy" on my list.

I was sure Santa really

wanted me to have a puppy,

but, for whatever reason, he

couldn't seem to get it together.

I mean, I didn't know how they ran

things up there in the North Pole.

(HUMMING)

(WIND BLOWING)

Dagnabit!

But it seemed to me like maybe

Santa was in over his head.

(HUMMING)

Um, boss?

Excuse us, sir.

You forgot a couple...

(DOG WHIMPERS)

(SANTA LAUGHS)

MARIAH: Hmm...

I'm not sure about that.

Maybe Mom and Dad

had something to do

with Santa not

getting me a puppy.

(SANTA HUMMING)

Sorry.

I'm running late again.

Butterscotch.

My favorite!

You can have the cookies as

long as you don't leave a dog.

MARIAH: Nah.

Mom and Dad would never have

done anything like that to me.

Anyway, this Christmas,

I was determined

my present would be a puppy.

(BARKING) Gorilla!

Come back, Meatball!

Whoa! Gorilla!

Down, Meatball!

Mariah!

What's up? (GIGGLES)

Hi, Holly.

Hi, Ernesto.

Let's do a whipsnake!

Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Uh, I gotta go.

We just got here.

I have fashion show rehearsal

with Vicky and Grace.

Vicky and Grace?

Ooh! Popular.

I thought you and me were

doing refreshments together.

Uh, well, loan

still do 'em both.

I'll see ya.

We can skate tomorrow.

(BARKS)

What's wrong?

I'm on time.

"On time" is almost late.

Let's get going.

Our motto is, "You

snooze, you lose."

(BOTH LAUGHING)

MR. TYABJI:

Remember, students,

you'll be making your final

outfit choices today,

and you must bring them home

so they can be laundered and

pressed for the dress rehearsal.

Aw! How cute!

Don't forget to come Thursday

dressed in your outfits.

MARIAH: I had gotten

myself into a fix.

I wanted a puppy,

but now I really needed one.

I had pretty much given up on

Mom and Dad, and Santa, too,

but when everyone

else lets you down,

there's always Grandma, right?

Honey, my hands are cold.

Let's step in here.

But it's almost 6:00.

I think she'll stay open for us.

(DOOR BELL TINKLES)

Merry Christmas, Emiko.

Mariah! So nice to see you.

Hello, Lucy.

So sorry, Mrs. Inadomi,

I know you're closing, but...

Oh...

Isn't he darling?

Sure, but you know

what Mom and Dad say.

"Dogs are trouble!"

But ever so worth it

and ever so snuggly.

Grandma!

Is that even sanitary?

MARIAH: Did you see that? Remember

what I said about grandmas?

They have a sneaky way of figuring

out how to make everyone happy.

Mariah, I hear you're working

on the pet fashion show.

Thanks to you kids, we'll be

able to have our adoption fair.

She's a little older, and those

puppies were climbing all over her,

so I moved her to her

own special apartment.

She's a quiet little girl,

never hear a peep out of her.

MARIAH: And that's how it

happened, love at first sight.

Oh...

She's so sweet!

So well-behaved,

and doesn't shed.

She's hypoallergenic.

Did someone maybe tell you

my dad's allergic to dogs?

Huh?

I was just pointing out

one of her many attributes.

She's such a little

princess in every way.

Oh, that's such a perfect name.

Princess!

MARIAH: That was it.

I was hooked.

I didn't want

just any dog anymore.

I had to have Princess.

Christmas time

Is in the air again

Christmas chimes reminding me

Of when we

Fell like the snow

So deep in love

High above us, the evergreens

Sparkle with lights

and feel the breeze

As we made future

Christmas memories

(ALL CHEERING)

For a honey to

hold Christmas Day

And to feel love

like ours always

And the dream is to share

this Christmas cheer

With you all throughout the year

And not wait till the morning

When Christmas time

Is in the air

Christmas time is everywhere

Christmas time

Is in the air again

Again

And again

Naughty!

(LIGHTS FLICKERING)

(POWERING DOWN)

MARIAH: Oh, Grandpa Bill.

Not again.

(LAUGHING) Grandpa Bill!

Not again!

(GASPS)

You've just got to stop this!

I am sick of these blinkin' lights

keeping me awake all hours.

MARIAH: Mmm-hmm. Funny, seeing as Grandpa's

room was at the back of the house.

What was really goin' on was

he had Christmas display envy.

Mom liked things tasteful,

you know, understated.

So, Grandpa took

out his frustrations

on poor Mr. Ingersoll's

blinking lights.

You're gonna get in trouble!

Plug those back in!

Can't remember

which one goes in which.

Come here, show me.

Nuh-uh, I'm not trespassing.

(POWERING UP)

Come away from there!

(MARIAH GASPS)

Where are you going?

Cut it out!

Come on!

(LOW SHRIEK)

(GASPS)

Quick!

They're gonna catch you!

Catch us, my partner in crime.

(GIGGLES)

I'm not your partner in crime.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

You're impossible.

MARIAH: So, on top of keeping

Grandpa out of trouble

and making sure I had Princess

by the fashion show,

I had a lot to deal

with that Christmas.

Auditions for the spring

musical were coming up,

so I was dying to make a good

impression on my choir teacher.

Beautiful!

(ALL VOCALIZING)

(HUMMING)

MARIAH: And I had to get my little

brother to keep our back door shut.

Uh, the back door was wide open.

I know I closed it.

Brett?

Sorry.

What were you two doing outside?

Oh, darling, we've been admiring

Ingersoll's Christmas display.

It's a doozy this year.

PENELOPE: There's no

accounting for taste.

It's an eyesore.

Oh, there's my girl.

Come here, Penny.

I have a vision for

a whole reindeer herd

pulling a sleigh the size of a Winnebago

that can fit the whole family.

It'll wrap around the house,

continue up on the roof.

A thousand blinking lights.

Let's see Fred Ingersoll

top that!

Blinking lights?

Tacky.

Not in our yard.

BILL: Ow!

(MARIAH LAUGHING)

Wait till they're baked.

Oh, come on.

(MUTTERING)

(LAUGHS)

(HORN HONKS)

Dad's got the tree!

Brett...

Close the door, dude.

(LAUGHTER)

MARIAH: I had to give it to Grandma.

She knew how to work it.

She really made

a case for Princess.

You can't use the dog

allergy excuse this time.

Ahhh! Mom!

You heard me.

The dog's hypoallergenetic,

or whatever they call it.

Oh, Brett, sweetie...

Let's not do tinsel.

It's so...

ALL: Tacky.

And you can't say

she hasn't earned a pet.

She's so responsible

and thoughtful.

Does her chores and everybody

else's chores, too.

(GIGGLES) Ouch!

Top of her class,

soloing in the choir.

Model United Nations

representative.

Mrs. Reyes better

elect her Model UN president.

Oh! I so hope

that she gets it.

What does Mariah hope for?

These are Mariah's goals.

Maybe 'cause someone

told her they should be.

BUD: Ow!

Ma!

Lucy, all her accomplishments could fall

apart with a distraction like a pet.

What's wrong with a distraction?

She needs to be a little girl.

She doesn't know

what she'd be taking on.

Uh, Bud, that garland's

upside down.

(SIGHS)

And when she finds out

she's in over her head,

I'll be the one

taking care of a mutt.

It's time to put

the topper on the tree.

I've got that totally covered.

Daddy.

BUD: Up you go, Supergirl.

(GASPS)

(MARIAH GIGGLES)

Isn't she the most beautiful

dog you've ever seen?

Where are you going?

I got to get ready to take

my brother to the airport.

Oh, I have something

for Uncle Reg.

I made him a potholder.

Hmm.

Yeah, that's very

thoughtful of you, Mariah.

I'm sure he'll treasure it.

(HUMMING SOFTLY)

What do you call that thing?

It's not a thing.

She's a dog.

I asked Santa for her.

MARIAH: Well, a lot of good

that had done me in the past,

but I was still hoping that somehow

Santa would get it right this time.

Her name is Princess,

and she's a poochon.

A "poo-chon"?

(LAUGHING)

MARIAH: Such a loving and

supportive little brother.

(SIGHING)

Dopey, it means

part poodle and bichon.

And she's perfectly perfect.

BRETT: Oh, look,

now she's part pug.

Brett...

(CONTINUES LAUGHING)

(SIGHS)

You're such a clown.

Jealous.

Priceless.

I can help, Mariah.

No, thanks, Beth.

You're scared I'll mess her up.

No, I'm not. It's just...

I'm done. There.

MARIAH: Daddy could

never say no to me.

Look, Daddy!

MARIAH: But he always figured out

a way to do it without saying it,

especially when

it came to a dog.

Possible.

Maybe, maybe not.

I'll get back to you on that.

I'll have to discuss

that with your mother.

You'll have to take

that up with Santa.

MARIAH: But this Christmas

was his best yet.

He really pulled

a fast one on me.

(LUCY HUMMING)

I can wrap some

of yours, Mariah.

Um...

I think I've got it, but thanks.

Mariah, I think you hurt

your sister's feelings.

Oh, no.

I didn't mean to hurt her...

Couldn't you let

her wrap just one?

Does it really

matter how it looks?

Well, this one's for my teacher,

so it's got to be perfect.

PENELOPE:

We should've discussed this.

It'll work out

just fine, trust me.

(GIGGLES)

Well, lookie here.

What's that, Daddy?

I have a proposal for you.

Can't wait to hear it.

Reggie needs a dog-sitter for, you

know, his, uh, pooch, while he's away.

Uncle Reggie has a dog?

Mmm...

It was a recent acquisition.

Thought he couldn't

have pets at his apartment.

Well, they made an

exception for this one.

Mmm-mmm-mmm.

Can I dog-sit the dog?

I can dog-sit!

MARIAH:

Oh, no, you didn't. No.

Oh, Daddy, I'd be the best dog-sitter ever.

Let me see! Let me see!

MARIAH: And I fell

right into his trap.

But, wait!

Here's the deal.

Let's see how you do

dog-sitting this guy,

and then we'll see about...

What's her...

Princess!

I can have Princess

if I dog-sit?

Grandma!

Dog-sit well.

I'm all about well. That's me. I can

do well. I promise. Let me see him.

I bet he's so cute.

(CHUCKLES) Yeah. He sure is.

Something like that.

Okay.

Oh, boy.

Bud, you're not going to...

Oh...

He's a...

Is that a dog?

MARIAH: Ugh!

Uh...

Don't worry, Pen, I'm pretty

sure Reggie house-trained him.

What's his name?

Huh?

Don't look at me, darling.

Oh, yeah.

Uh...

(BARKS)

MARIAH: Did Uncle Reggie

even train him?

Hey.

Jack!

MARIAH: Come here, Jack.

Come here, baby.

PENELOPE: Bud!

Come over here.

BUD: It's harmless.

MARIAH: Oh, no.

Come here, good boy.

(CONTINUES BARKING)

Catch him, Grandma.

Come here, you!

BUD: I said, "Hey"!

Demon.

Bud, do something!

Settle down now.

I'll get you.

PENELOPE: Ooh!

Off the couch!

BUD: Hey, now stop that.

Can you sit? Stay?

Lie down?

Catch him! Good Lord,

I think he has rabies!

BUD: Come here, you!

Jack.

Whoa!

(PANTING)

(SNIFFING)

Where's he going?

My steaks.

(HUMS)

(SHRIEKS)

Stop!

Hey. Hey! Hey!

(SCREAMS)

Drop it, you thief!

BRETT: What's for dinner?

ALL: Shut the door!

Whoa!

Some kind of giant rat thing

just ran past me.

(SIGHS IN FRUSTRATION)

Steak! All right!

I know. I know, Pen.

We should've discussed

this together first.

Oh, Bud, dear... It looks

like he took your steak.

Jack!

Here, boy!

Here, baby!

Come here, little guy!

Jack!

Uh...

Hi, Mr. Ingersoll.

Did you maybe see a

small dog thing around?

It's just befuddling.

Can I help you with something?

What's that?

Oh! Hello, Mariah.

I just can't figure out

why my lights aren't blinking.

I bought blinking lights.

Just not as cheerful

when they don't blink.

Not sure, Mr. Ingersoll.

Jack!

Where'd you go?

Jack!

Jack?

(LOW GROWL)

Hold still, guy.

(STRUGGLING)

(SNIFFING)

MARIAH: Yum!

This looks so tasty.

(SMACKS LIPS)

(WHIMPERS)

Scrumptious.

This is the best steak I've

ever had in the world.

Yum-yum.

Nuh-uh!

This is my dinner.

Yum...

Come on, you know you want it.

Follow me.

That's it.

Just a little further.

(SIGHS IN RELIEF)

Ha! I got ya!

Hi.

Oh, congratulations, Mariah.

Let's take a look.

Oh, he's a beautiful specimen.

Grandpa, did you do something

to Mr. Ingersoll's lights?

It's my secret weapon.

The Unblinker.

You screw it in

anywhere on the strand,

and they all become Unblinkers.

It'll drive Ingersoll

blinkin' mad. (EVIL LAUGH)

Grandpa, that's so naughty.

(BARKS)

Oh, honey, I think this dog

is too much of a handful.

Don't feel like

you have to keep him.

MARIAH: No way, Mom. I'll do

anything to get Princess.

I'm taking care of this dog.

Dad and I have a deal.

(WHIMPERS)

I can do it.

I know I can.

Hmm... Well...

I guess if anyone

can do it, you can.

He's gonna need

a leash for starters.

Oh! I know all about

dog supplies.

PENELOPE: And a bath.

(JACK WHIMPERING)

MARIAH: It's just water.

Ow!

Have you ever had a bath before?

Come here! Stop it!

What is she doing to him?

(TOILETRIES CLATTERING)

MARIAH: Let me dry you.

Poor little guy.

Oh, honey, I wouldn't...

MARIAH: Hey!

(GROANS)

Beth!

Where'd he go?

(SIGHS)

Did Jack come in here?

Nope.

Haven't seen him.

Not in here.

Been swimming?

(BRETT LAUGHS)

Is the back door closed?

Yeah, it's closed.

It better be.

(MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)

h*, h*, h*, who wouldn't go?

h*, h*, h*

Click, click

Down through the chimney

with good St. Nick

MARIAH: Dad.

Huh?

You didn't happen

to see Jack, did you?

Wait, what's that?

You've lost him?

No, no.

We're playing hide-and-seek.

Hmm?

Yeah, it's so much fun.

Hmm...

h*, h*, h*

Hmm?

(SNEEZES)

MARIAH: Uh-huh!

Mmm-hmm.

Jack?

Here, boy.

Come on out now.

Jack?

(GASPS)

MARIAH: (SCREAMS) Jack!

(MUSIC PLAYING)

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLES)

(MUSIC LOWERING AND STOPS)

(LUCY HUMMING)

Aren't you handsome

now that you're all clean.

(SIGHS)

Thanks, Grandma. Night.

Night, sweet pea.

(SWITCH CLICKS)

(JACK WHIMPERS)

Off!

You can't be up here.

Even if you did get my

extra-special spa treatment.

I did do a pretty excellent job.

You are sort of handsome.

Okay.

Just a few days,

and I'll have Princess.

I can stand it.

MARIAH: That's what I thought.

(SIGHS)

The things you do for love.

Just when I thought he was

sort of, kind of cute.

Well, he would

start acting like a dog.

Ugh!

Don't kiss me.

And especially not my face.

(BARKS)

You can stay up here as long

as you don't try that again.

(CHOKES)

Why are you doing that?

What's the matter with you?

(GRUNTS)

No. Oh, please, you're not...

Oh, no.

Don't you dare!

No.No! No!

No!

(JACK VOMITS)

Gross.

MARIAH: Gross!

Ew!

When did you eat zucchini?

(BARKS)

MARIAH: The next day

things were better.

I was feeling pretty confident

about getting Princess.

So, I went shopping.

Uh, I said, "Shopping."

(DOOR OPENS)

(SIGHS)

The door...

(DOOR CLOSES)

What is all this pink stuff?

Doggie supplies.

But isn't Uncle Reggie

coming back soon?

And Jack's a boy.

These aren't for Jack,

they're for Princess.

You got color-coordinated

poopy bags?

(LAUGHING)

That's priceless.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Pink poopy bags, priceless.

Not nice.

Kindness, please.

(MUFFLED SNIGGERING)

(LAUGHTER)

(SIGHS)

Come on, Jack.

(BARKS)

(SNIFFING)

Nuh-uh-uh!

That's Princess' bed.

You can borrow her collar,

but not her bed.

(WHIMPERS)

No, this is for the toy drive.

(LOW GROWL)

No!

Argh!

(BARKS)

Give me that.

(JACK BARKS)

MARIAH: Come back here.

(CHUCKLING)

Argh!

Grandma, why does he hate me?

He doesn't hate you, sweetheart,

just teething, probably.

Teething?

He has enough teeth.

(LOW GROWL)

Seem to remember someone else who

gave me a lot of trouble teething.

Oh, Grandma.

Just need to get

him a good bone.

I'm talkin' real bone,

with beef.

The handbook doesn't say

anything about beef bones.

(LAUGHING)

MARIAH: Thank goodness Grandma was

able to work outside the handbook.

(BARKS)

If only I could have had

Grandma with me everywhere.

Heel, heel, heel, now sit!

MARIAH: But, unfortunately,

that wasn't possible.

It's just befuddling.

(SIGHS)

Okay, walk on, let's go.

(GROWLS)

Jack, they're not real.

(BARKS)

Jack, no!

(SIGHING)

Ooh, my lil snowman

He's the coolest cat in town

(BARKS)

He's jolly and he's happy

Nothing's gonna bring him down

All the people say

that there ain't no way

Hey!

This Christmas

he ain't comin' around

Ooh, my lil snowman

He's the finest boy to me

Look at that dog!

Ooh ooh ooh

He's got them pretty little eyes

(DOGS BARKING)

And the biggest belly

you've ever seen

Ooh ooh ooh

He's got his hat to the back

'Cause he's cool like that

Oh, hey!

(BARKS)

Ah!

And they don't know

how he makes me feel

(GROANS)

Sorry!

Ooh, my lil snowman

Does what no one else can

You can't tell me

he ain't for real

(LAUGHS)

Baby, baby, my bah)'

Ooh ooh ooh

(CHOMPING)

Baby, baby, my bah)'

(JACK URINATING)

Ooh ooh ooh

Ooh, my lil snowman

Does what no one else can

You can't tell me

he ain't for real

MARIAH: Jack, stop! Sorry!

Jack!

(BARKING)

Mommy, it's a monster.

Make him stop, Mommy.

Ooh, my lil snowman

He's the coolest cat in town

(CRYING)

(MARIAH GROANS)

He's jolly and he's happy

Nothing's gonna bring him down

(SCREAMING)

(BARKS)

All the people say

That there ain't no way

(SOBS)

This Christmas

he ain't comin' around

Ooh, my lil snowman

He's the finest boy to me

Oh, no.

Whoa!

Ooh! Yikes!

Whoa!

ERNESTO: Right, check it out.

(CHILDREN GIGGLING)

Whoo!

Yeah! That's what

I'm talking about!

Come on, Mariah.

MAN: Watch out!

Whose dog is that?

(BARKING)

Ooh, my lil snowman

Does what no one else can

You can't tell me

he ain't for real

PRINCIPAL REYES: Hello, Mariah.

(GASPS)

Oh!

Hello, Principal Reyes.

(CONTINUES BARKING)

That's not your dog, is it?

MAN: Hey, that's my scarf!

Oh! No, of course not.

So irresponsible letting a dog

run loose here. (TUTTING)

Dangerous.

Hey, Mariah!

MARIAH: Whoa!

Help!

(SCREAMING)

MARIAH: No! Jack didn't

take out the principal.

The one who was recommending me

to lead Model United Nations.

(CHILDREN LAUGHING)

Whoa!

(BOTH GROAN)

Mariah.

(GRUNTS) I'm so sorry,

Principal Reyes.

Are you okay?

(JACK BARKING)

Jack! Not my face, Jack.

I thought you said

that wasn't your dog.

He's not.

Stop! Jack!

I'm surprised at you, Mariah.

I've never known you to lie.

(GLASS PIECE SHATTERS)

(GROANS)

Is this your new dog?

He's the best.

Where's your skates?

He's not my dog,

and he's not the best,

and I don't have time to skate.

Why are you so busy suddenly?

(SIGHS) Well, you know,

you snooze, you lose.

MARIAH:

I had a wonderful reputation.

Upstanding, thoughtful, witty...

Jack was determined to ruin it.

He has no shame.

Hey, he's putting us to shame.

(GROANS)

Okay. You can put up

one display, just one.

Really? Oh!

This is so great, Penny,

'cause wait till you

see what I've got in mind.

(CHEERING)

Small, understated, tasteful.

Oh, absolutely.

Evening, partner.

(SIGHS)

Hello, sweetheart. Off the couch, Mr.

Whiskers.

Are you ready to call it quits?

MARIAH: No way.

I've gotten this far.

I'm not giving up now.

Besides, Jack and I

are having the best time.

He's the best.

(GROWLING)

(SIGHS)

(BARKING)

MARIAH: What on Earth?

Jack,

what have we talked about?

(JACK WHIMPERING)

Argh!

(LOW WHINING)

(SIGHS)

BUD: Mariah,

didn't you take Jack out?

We've been out all day.

BUD: Well, he's left a little present

for you at the bottom of the stairs.

You better get busy.

What?

How is that even possible?

I never took my eyes off you.

(SIGHS)

Can't believe this.

(YAWN S)

PENELOPE:

Need some help, honey?

Nope, I got this.

Not a problem.

Stay.

MARIAH: Apparently, my brother wasn't the

only one who had trouble closing doors.

Nice look.

Fashion was very important

to me, as you can see.

Yep, what I said

about closing doors.

(WHIMPERING)

Jack, Jack, it's me, come back.

Ugh!

No way!

(LOUD GRUNT)

BUD: Mariah, what's going on?

Nothing.

Everything's just

perfectly perfect.

On! (LAUGHING)

Well, I'll be.

(SIGHS)

I had to clean up after him.

And now...

(SIGHS)

LUCY: on!

I see he really

decked the halls.

(LAUGHS)

I seem to remember someone

who had me cleanin' up a lot.

You went through diapers

like nobody's business.

Oh, Grandma, please, do you

have to bring up me as a baby?

(LAUGHING)

Oh, honey, don't ever ask me

not to bring up you as a baby.

Come on, I'll help you out.

Thanks, Grandma, but I got this.

I can do it.

Mmm-mmm-mmm.

(SIGHS)

Jack, come out,

I look normal now.

Yuck! Don't lick me.

(GIGGLES) Okay, okay, please,

just don't lick me.

Let's go to bed.

(LAUGHS)

You're silly.

MARIAH: Okay, so we had

moments of sweetness,

but little did I know, it was

only the calm before the storm.

(WHINING)

You got your bone, you've got water, food.

You're good.

You stay in there.

BUD: Wow! Nice.

(FRONT DOOR CLOSES)

You're sure that dog's secure?

Sure, let's go.

Gonna be late.

Honey, he's too lonely

to be left there.

(JACK WHIMPERING)

Oh, gosh.

Okay, I'll bring him.

FRED: Oh, I see you're finally

making an effort, Bill.

Nice (CLEARS THROAT)

item you got there.

Oh, is that Mr. Marshmallow

or a snowman?

(JACK BARKS)

Oh! Hi, Mr. Ingersoll!

(BARKS)

(LAUGHING)

(AIR HISSING)

Uh-oh!

(INGRID LAUGHING)

Oh!

Dog has good taste.

(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)

(SIGHS)

Well, we can't wait

all night for Mariah,

even if she is the soloist.

The show must go on.

Everybody!

(BLOWS WHISTLE SOFTLY)

Deck the halls

with boughs of holly

Fa la la la la, la la la la

'Tis the season to be jolly

Fa la la la la, la la la la

BUD: Better hurry, Supergirl.

Don we now g*y apparel Troll

the ancient Christmas carol

Fa la la la la, la la la la

See the blazing Yule before us

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Strike the harp

and join the chorus

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Follow me in merry measure

Shh! Jack! Cut it out!

(HOWLING)

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Deck the halls with

Pup's got a set of pipes

on him, that's for sure!

And a set of teeth.

'Tis the season to be jolly

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Don we now our g*y apparel Troll

the ancient Christmas carol

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Follow me in merry treasure While

I tell of Christmas treasure

Fa la la la la, la la la la

(DOGS HOWLING)

Fast away the old year passes

Fa la la la la, la la la la

I've never heard this version.

This rocks!

Sing we joyous all together

Heedless of the wind and weather

Make them stop, Mommy.

(RUMBLING)

(ALL GASPING)

I wanna go home!

Mariah!

MARIAH: The spring musical wasn't

looking so great at that point.

In fact, it looked like I could

say goodbye to choir altogether,

thanks to Jack.

Jack! Cool it!

MARIAH: And Jack wasn't finished

destroying my reputation. Oh, no.

He had much bigger plans for me.

Hey, buddy. Mariah, Mom

says you need to get ready

for your dress rehearsal

if you wanna be early.

(SIGHS)

I was supposed to do that.

Yesterday.

I would have done it.

It's okay.

I know you hate it.

Hey, where'd Jack go?

Did you close the back door?

Uh...

MARIAH: Jack? You up here?

Jack?

MARIAH: Unbelievable how such a

small creature could be capable of

so much destruction.

(BARKS)

Jack! Drop it!

Jack, give that to me.

Nice doggie.

Don't move!

Give that to me.

Jack!

(GROANS)

(GROANS)

Jack.

Come here, you!

(STRAINS) Give it to me!

Oh, no, no, no!

PENELOPE:

Mariah, are you okay?

Jack's not getting

into trouble, is he?

No. Everything's great.

(SIGHS)

You little...

(SOBS)

Hey, Mariah.

Yeah?

What's wrong?

Oh, no!

I could help.

H ow?

I don't mess up everything.

I didn't say you did.

BETH: I got an idea.

Okay. What is it?

MARIAH: Yep,

that was the Christmas

I was turned into a trespasser

to save Grandpa,

and a thief because of Jack.

We're just borrowing it.

(GIGGLING)

She looks Christmassy.

MARIAH: What do you think?

Works for me.

I guess.

MARIAH: Are you kidding? I

could make anything look good.

Even a borrowed Mrs. Santa

suit that had been outside for

maybe 10 Christmases.

What about the dog?

I don't have one yet.

Yes, you do.

Hmm.

Pretty cute.

Better than leaving him here.

He'd eat the house.

(SIGHS)

Something tells me

this is not a good idea.

MARIAH: And did I listen? No.

PENELOPE: We better get going. Don't

forget your toys for the toy drive.

Thanks for helping me, Beth.

At least he didn't ruin this.

Not for you, buster.

(HUMMING)

Don we now our g*y apparel Troll

the ancient Christmas carol

Fa la la la la

What is wrong with you?

OVER SPEAKER: h*-h*-h*!

h*-h*-h*! h*-h*-h*!

Come on, Jack, we're late. Don't

you know, you snooze, you lose?

Gotta go. Bye, Mom.

MR. TYABJI: We're going to get

started, so please, everyone,

take a seat and settle,

if you wouldn't mind.

I, Mr. Tyabji, the Community

Charity League Director,

welcome you to

the Fashion and Friends show!

Thank you for coming. Proceeds will

benefit our local pet shelter,

a cause we all

care deeply about.

Let's see how you

and your best friend

can be fashionable this season.

Let's get this show started!

(APPLAUSE)

MR. TYABJI: Who says dog

is only man's best friend?

Here's Cindy with

her best pal Orbid

wearing this

attractive matching ensemble.

What happened to you?

I'm so sorry, girls. I...

Is that the dog

you brought caroling?

He's just a stand-in,

till I get my real dog.

Don't worry, he'll be fine.

(WHINES)

Hey, where'd you get a hat?

Looks great.

Good thinking.

MR. TYABJI: And look who's

ready for duck hunting season.

Mario and Sparky with

a red camouflage number.

Is something wrong with him?

MR. TYABJI: Who says fashion

can't be functional?

Uh... Stage fright?

These high quality

sporty outfits and more

are available at

Ingersoll's Hardware.

MARIAH: Oh, yes, this was my

finest Christmas performance,

and Jack made it all possible.

MR. TYABJI: And just when you

thought Christmas was over...

Okay, that's us.

Chausette, walk on.

Liebchen, heel.

MARIAH: Oh, boy.

Here goes nothin'.

MR. TYABJI: on sale at

Mendel's Yardage and Sundries.

Buy a size up and your

daughters and their pets

will be ready for next

year's holiday season.

(GASPS) What are

the Ingersolls doing here?

What's wrong?

They are big sponsors.

They're going to arrest me.

For modeling?

Shh!

Let's go.

Come on, Jack.

Don't fail me now.

MARIAH: Jack performed as well as

I had imagined Princess would.

That's amazing!

I want a dog like that.

So cool!

What an amazing dog!

(WHISTLES)

MARIAH: But that lasted

for about two seconds.

(APPLAUSE)

Ingrid, there's

something familiar

about that Santa suit,

isn't there?

(SHUSHING)

(WHISPERS) Sit, Jack.

(JACK WHIMPERS)

Oh!

(GASPS)

(INDISTINCT MURMURING)

Jack.

(BARKS)

Whoa!

(GIGGLING)

(JACK VOMITS)

Ahhh!

MR. TYABJI: Keep calm,

ladies and gentlemen.

Stay in your seats. We'll get

janitorial in right away.

That's disgusting!

GIRL: Gross.

MARIAH: I don't know

how I ever lived that down.

I tried to repair some of

the damage Jack caused,

but things just kept going

downhill that Christmas.

(BILL GROANS)

Oh!

(LAUGHS)

Let's see you find

this one, Ingersoll.

Yes, yes, yes!

(SCREAMING)

(BILL GROANS)

(MARIAH SIGHS)

(BARKS)

I'm sure they don't want me

in the show anymore.

Oh, honey, I doubt that.

He hoarked up the sleeve

of my Santa suit!

(GRUNTS LOUDLY)

Hmm... Well...

Mr. Ingersoll's lights

stopped blinking again.

Mom, gotta get some more ribbon.

You stay.

Don't forget to close the door!

(LAUGHING)

(DOOR CLOSES)

MARIAH: I don't think I ever

would have been bold enough

to sneak onto the Ingersolls'

property alone, at night,

but after all the trouble Jack had

caused, I guess I had nothing to lose.

(WHISPERS) Grandpa?

Grandpa?

Grandpa, are you here?

(GASPS)

MARIAH:

You gotta be kidding me.

Now, Mariah, it's not

what it looks like.

MARIAH: Looks to me like

he was about to fall

into a fish pond

and get electrocuted.

Oh, no! Gosh! Wow!

I'm going to the outlet.

I'll unplug you.

Oh, forget about that 'cause

Ingersoll, of course, locked it.

Hmm, smart.

Okay, don't move.

Don't breathe.

Please don't fall.

Please don't fall.

(BOTH SHRIEK)

You are trespassing?

(SHUSHING)

Grandpa?

(CONTINUES SHUSHING)

(LAUGHING)

Oh, wow! If he falls through that

ice with all those lights on...

Zap!

Yeah. I get it.

I got a plan.

You have a plan?

If you can trespass,

I can have a plan.

Ooh!

(BRANCH CREAKS)

(GASPS)

Oh, gosh. Oh, gee.

Busted, jail time.

Juvie!

Drama queen.

Community service if.

Let's go!

Nuh-uh! I can't.

Can't move.

BRETT: Too tall.

Too short.

Just right. Come on!

MARIAH: What are we doing?

BRETT: Lift this guy.

(STRUGGLING)

(SIGHS)

Come on, grab a leg.

No! Grandpa's leg.

Oh!

(MARIAH GASPS)

BRETT: NOW pull!

(SCREAMS)

(MARIAH STRAINING)

Ooh!

Oh, dear.

(SIGHS)

(BARKING)

It's just us, little guy.

Hey, someone stole my sandwich.

Was it you, Jack, buddy?

LUCY: Old man?

Where are you?

I'm coming.

That's it.

Ingersoll got me beat.

(BILL SIGHS)

You saved him.

MARIAH: HOW humiliating.

My slacker little

brother had to take charge.

See?

I'm not totally worthless.

I know.

(BARKING)

(GIGGLING)

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

MARIAH: Okay, so I guess

if it hadn't been for Jack,

I wouldn't have gone

to save Grandpa, either,

given I had nothing to lose

after Jack ruined my reputation

with my Community Charity League

director and my choir leader

and my principal and my friends.

(SIGHS)

I almost could

forgive him, but then...

(JACK BARKS)

(LOW GROWLING)

Jack! No!

Get back here, you little scamp!

(LAUGHTER)

It's Santa Claus!

OVER SPEAKER: h*-h*-h*!

I got you!!

Mommy, it's a monster!

I wanna go home!

(MARIAH GRUNTS)

(ALL LAUGHING)

(SIGHS)

Come on, Jack. What did I tell

you about licking my face?

(GROANS)

Okay, not good.

MARIAH: Not good at all.

I happened to know the elves were

the mayor's personal favorite,

and I think

the Ingersolls donated them.

I wasn't very confident about

getting Princess anymore.

It was the night

before Christmas Eve.

I only had one more day to prove

I could take care of a dog,

but I didn't think there was anything

worse Jack could do at this point.

(CHITTERING)

(LOW GROWL)

(BARKING)

(GROWLING)

PENELOPE: What's going on?

BUD: I'm sure it's nothing.

BRETT: What's wrong?

What on Earth?

BILL: Oh, dear.

What?

Huh. Priceless.

(BUD SNEEZES LOUDLY)

(MARIAH GASPS)

(SNEEZES)

(GASPS) It's Santa Claus!

It's Jack!

(BARKS)

What a mess you've made

of our living room, Jack!

He's made a mess of Christmas.

He's made a mess

of my whole life.

You're the worst dog ever!

I can't wait to get rid of you.

(WHINING)

Mariah! He's just a pup.

(sesame)

(GRUNTS)

(SIGHS)

Uh, I'm sorry

I yelled at you, Jack.

Grandma's right.

You're just a pup.

(SIGHS)

Won't you come out?

Well, suit yourself.

MARIAH: Now Jack really

had done his worst.

Or had he?

The fire is burning

The room's all aglow

Outside the December wind blows

Away in the distance

The carolers sing in the snow

(WHIMPERS)

Everybody's laughing

The world is celebrating

And everyone's so happy

except for me tonight

Because I miss you

Most at Christmas time

And I can't get you

Get you off my mind

Every other season comes along

and I'm all right

But then I miss you

MARIAH: Jack?

Most at Christmas time

Jack!

Where are you hiding?

Brett! The door!

The shelter will call us

if they find him, honey.

There's nothing else we can do.

BUD: I finished

calling the neighbors.

They couldn't...

They can't stand Jack.

They aren't gonna help.

Well, they haven't seen him.

Well, what will

I tell Uncle Reg?

He'll be heartbroken.

He'll never speak to me again.

Mariah,

I have a confession to make.

He wasn't really

Uncle Reggie's dog.

What?

What?

He was a stray Reggie found.

He was gonna drop him at the

shelter, but then I got...

One of your ideas?

BUD: I got a collar.

I thought if you had

a taste of a brute like Jack,

you'd change your mind

about having a dog.

So you wouldn't have to say no.

Son, I might be

a devil of a prankster,

but even I wouldn't stoop

to such a rotten trick.

That's so, so...

Passive aggressive?

Yeah.

It was a dirty trick.

No one could have

handled that mutt.

I'm so sorry.

We still should find him.

We will, but there's somewhere

we need to be first.

That's right. The adoption center

closes early on Christmas Eve.

You mean...

Let's go pick up Princess.

Really?

We decided.

Decided.

Oh, Daddy! Thank you!

Hopefully Princess won't be

anything like Jack.

I'll say.

Huh?

Oh! You made it.

I wasn't sure you

were coming back.

Remember, Dougie,

I told you some folks had come

and put a deposit on this puppy.

Would you like to pick

out another pet, son?

No, thanks.

Not today.

Bye, Rascal.

(LOW WHIMPER)

Oh, my. That's the first time

she's ever made a sound.

I didn't know she could bark.

Come on, son.

Yeah, I know.

You snooze, you lose.

No, you don't lose.

Wait!

I...

What is it, sweetie?

The puppy is yours.

What?

What?

What do you mean?

If you still want her,

you can have her.

For real?

Thank you.

Rascal!

I'm not sure I understand,

Mariah.

You said Princess

was your dream dog.

I was wrong.

My dream dog is Jack.

Jack? That monster?

He isn't a monster to me.

Well, maybe he is a monster,

but I love him.

You couldn't.

She could.

What do you think?

Can't just take

a dog in and not keep it.

Okay, but he ran away.

I know.

And it's my fault.

I don't want a lot for Christmas

There is just one thing I need

I don't care about the presents

Underneath the Christmas tree

I just want you for my own

More than you could ever know

Make my wish come true

All I want for Christmas

Is you

Where are you going?

It is freezing out there.

(CLATTERS)

I've gotta find Jack.

Here, Mariah.

I made these.

Thanks, guys.

Let's go hang 'em up.

(GASPS)

Mariah, we heard about Jack.

We came to help you find him.

You... You did?

Of course.

I thought you were mad at me

for not hanging outwith you.

But Jack messed up

the rehearsal.

MR. TYABJI:

But that's what puppies do.

Don't be silly.

You're our friend.

Yeah.

We wanna help you find him.

He's got a rather nice howl,

actually, an alto.

But we ruined the caroling.

We don't care about that.

We care about you.

And your pet.

He is your pet, isn't he?

Yes.

He is.

And we're gonna find him.

(CHEERING)

Here, everybody!

Take some fliers.

I don't want a lot for Christmas

There is just one thing I need

And I don't care

about the presents

MARIAH: Jack! Jack!

Underneath the Christmas tree

I don't need to hang my stocking

Here, Jack!

There upon the fireplace

Jack! Jack!

Santa Claus won't make me happy

With a toy on Christmas Day

I just want you for my own

More than you could ever know

Make my wish come true

All I want for Christmas is you

You, baby

I won't ask for

much this Christmas

I won't even wish for snow

I'm just gonna keep on waiting

Underneath the mistletoe

I won't make a list and send it

To the North Pole for Saint Nick

Jack! Jack!

I won't even stay awake

To hear those

magic reindeer click

'Cause I just

want you here tonight

Here, buddy!

Holding on to me so tight

What more can I do?

Baby, all I want for Christmas

Is you

Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack

Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack

All the lights are shining

So brightly everywhere

Jack!

And the sound of children's

laughter fills the air

Here, boy!

Jack?

And everyone is singin'

I hear those

sleigh bells ringin'

Santa, won't you bring me

the one I really need?

MR. TYABJI:

Principal Reyes!

Won't you please

bring my baby to me?

Oh, I don't want

a lot for Christmas

Here, Jack!

Where are you?

This is all I'm asking for

I just wanna see my baby

Standing right outside my door

Oh, I just want you for my own

More than you could ever know

Make my wish come true

Baby, all I want for Christmas

Is you

Jack!

All I want for Christmas

Is you, baby

Where could he be?

There isn't anywhere

we haven't looked.

Why don't you ask Santa?

I don't think he

wants to talk to me.

Oh...

That's right. Bad idea.

What is it?

I think I will ask Santa.

OVER SPEAKERS: h*-h*-h*!

(SIGHS)

Jack!

I'm so sorry for being so bossy.

And for talking about

Princess all the time.

I love you, and I want

you to be my dog.

Who's she talking to?

(SHUSHING)

I don't get it.

Is he in there?

I promise to be perfect.

Forget about perfect.

I'll just do my best

to take good care of you

if you'll give me a chance.

Come on, Jack.

Come to me.

Come on, boy. Come.

OVER SPEAKERS: h*-h*-h*!

(GASPS)

(CHEERING)

Ugh!

Okay! Go for it!

Jack! You're so crazy!

(LAUGHING)

BRETT: We found Jack!

All right!

Merry Christmas!

ALL: Merry Christmas!

(ALL GASP)

ALL: Tacky.

Grand, isn't it?

Oh, it's something all right.

(BARKS)

Hey, I see you found your pup.

Glad to see it.

Thank you.

Merry Christmas.

Hopefully, that'll restore

some Christmas spirit

that you all are

clearly in need of.

(PENELOPE SIGHS)

(GIGGLING)

Oh, that does it.

Bill, you have my permission

to decorate till you drop.

Yes!

I really wanted this!

Oh!

(LAUGHTER)

Santa really came

through this time.

Thank you.

Sit, Jack.

Would you look at that?

Told ya, got to be beef.

MARIAH: Turns out, Dad wasn't

allergic to dogs after all.

Guess that sneezing stopped.

Yep. It's a Christmas...

(SNEEZES)

(CHITTERING)

(SHRIEKING)

Get 'em!

Come here!

There he goes!

There they are!

Get 'em!

Yeah!

BUD: Over there!

Behind that snowman!

Jack was innocent. It was the

squirrels the whole time.

PENELOPE: Get those squirrels!

(MUSIC PLAYING)

(CHUCKLING)

(BARKS)

MARIAH: So, you see, my first

love was a lot of trouble.

But definitely worth it,

and definitely snuggly.

(ALL CLAMORING)

MARIAH: Jack showed me my dog

didn't have to be perfect.

And I didn't have to be perfect,

because love is.