Kus: We excaliburlings do our work by being used as bloodsucking biological weapons.
Kus: But Maganagi is worse.
Kus: His staple food is swords, meaning...
Kus: He's a cannibal.
Hij: My bad feeling was on the mark.
Hij: That man wasn't Senbe the Manslayer.
Hij: It was his sword!
Gin: Looks like the one sword we really wanted to avoid
Gin: showed up in the hands of the one guy who shouldn't wield it.
Mag: Nothing vanished.
Mag: They're right here in my belly.
Mag: Both your sword
Mag: and this man.
Gintama,OP Card: Gintama
Slip Arc,OP Card: Slip Arc
Title: The Strongest Sword, and the Dullest Sword
Shin: I-Is that...
Kon: S-Sogo?
Hij: That's not him anymore.
Kon: T-Toshi!
Hij: Damn, we were too late.
Gin: Hey, Kusanagi, could it be?
Warning,Warning: Watch the Slip Arc in a bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!
Mag: I'm amazed you had the gall to treat me,Cursed Sword Maganagi, as you did.
Mag: Nobody has ever mocked me so much.No vessel has been such a pain to take over.
Mag: You were the first, Master.
Mag: But your superhuman body and mind, rare anywhere in the universe,
Mag: already belong to me, Maganagi.
Mag: The strongest sword and the strongest vessel are now one.
Mag: At last, I have attained strength unparalleled across the universe.
Kus: He got consumed! That bro got consumed by Maganagi!
Hij: Capture him!
Mag: Wow, what do you think you're doing to one of your comrades?
Kon: H-Hey, Toshi!
Hij: Just trust me for now. That's not Sogo anymore.
Hij: Your stupid game is over.
Hij: We know what you really are.Throw that sword away.
Mag: What are you saying? I'm in the middle of a real-sword fight here.
Mag: If I threw my sword away, I'd get sliced in half.
Hij: And if you won't do it,I'll just cut you down myself.
Mag: Can you do it?
Mag: Can you guys cut me down?
Mag: Because I can cut anything.
Kon: O-Our swords!
Mag: I'm sick of eating dull swords.
Kon: Sogo!
Gin: Hey, you're going after the wrong guy.
Gin: I'm your opponent.
Hij: Hey! You're the one who went after the wrong guy!
Hij: Why'd you throw poop at my face?
Gin: I didn't. It got sucked in to your face likeit was going home to where it belonged.
Hij: Whose face are you calling a toilet?!
Hij: I'm gonna k*ll him for sure.
Hij: Wait, Toshi.
Tet: Gin-san...
Gin: Stay away.
Gin: This is a real-sword fight.Keep your noses out of it.
Tet: Gin-san, this is no time for that.
Shin: She's right. Even if you want to fight, your sword's gone.
Gin: But I have a sword right here.
Gin: The best sword and wielder in the universe?
Gin: What's so scary about that? All they can do is cut.
Gin: We're the dullest sword and the man with the most constipated ass in the universe.
Gin: Not even you can cut us down.
Shin: All we've got is negatives!
Kus: G-Gintoki-han!
Gin: Maganagi...
Gin: No matter how much you corner them,
Gin: you can't sever the bond between Kusanagi and Scabberina, between husband and wife.
Sca: So-kun!
Sca: What's wrong, So-kun?!
Shin: It's already severed, though! She's not worried about us at all!
Gin: Even if you lose your memories, the vow between husband and wife...
Gin: The depraved memories of the ***** they exchanged thousands of times
Gin: will never vanish from their bodies!
Shin: In the end, they're only linked by dirty things!
Mag: Fool. If you fight at such close range,
Mag: you'll be forced to step deep into your enemy's reach.
Mag: And once I'm awakened, any sword within my reach is rendered dull and useless!
Kus: No! Don't touch him!
Kus: If you touch him right now,I'll be cannibalized!
Kus: Gintoki-han!
Gin: Don't touch the sword? Are you stupid?
Gin: That's obvious in a real-sword fight.
Kon: No way. He's seeing through all of Sogo's moves.
Gin: You probably don't get it since you change bodies all the time.
Gin: But for us, it's all over if we get cut by a sword once.
Gin: We won't get anything done if we hesitate, though.
Gin: When it comes to real-sword fights,
Gin: only those crazy enough to walk into mortal danger bare-handed are cut out for it.
Gin: Right, Okita-kun?
Gin: Actually, you're not him.
Gin: His moves aren't this easy to read.
Gin: What did you even take over his body for?
Mag: You little!
Gin: I don't know or care how many blades you've eaten in your life.
Gin: But I know that I've beaten many more than that!
Kus: C-Crap... Gintoki-han, I can't go on.
Kus: Th-The Viagra's effects r-ran out.
Gin: Huh? Wait a second!
Gin: You can't pull that now! And I don't remember giving you any Viagra!
Kus: Shaddup! I told ya my speed's all I got!
Kus: This is all yer fault for draggin' out the foreplay!
Gin: My foreplay doesn't take too long,you broken bastard!
Gin: Get it up already! This is way worse than just being dull!
Gin: You're basically a soggy Curl snack now!
Kag: Don't worry, Gin-chan! The cheese flavor is good even when soggy!
Gin: You keep your mouth shut!
Mag: You let the chance of a lifetime slip.
Mag: Thanks for your helpful advice!
Gin: His moves are getting sharper!
Mag: Did you think I can only control the body, the vessel?
Mag: My belly is filled with the experience and tactics of everyone I've eaten.
Mag: By the time I get used to this body,
Mag: I'll bring out more power than it originally had.
Mag: You know why?
Mag: Because I've eaten and beaten more blades than you could ever hope to!
Gin: Guess he's not called a cursed sword for nothing.
Shin: Th-This is bad.
Shin: He has to avoid contact with the blade. And Kusanagi-san's all limp, to boot!
Gin: I've gotta do something, or I'll lose here.
Shin: Gin-san!
Sca: That's enough! Stop it, you two!
Kus: S-Scabberina.
Mag: Oh?
Sca: Stop fighting over me.
Sca: I can't bear to watch So-kun getting hurt anymore!
Kus: Wh-What're ya sayin', Scabberina?
Kus: Th-That ain't your sword or So-kun.
Kus: That's Cursed Sword Maganagi, the one who put us through hell!
Sca: Shut it, geezer! I don't give a flying rat's ass about you!
Sca: All I care about is So-kun's safety.
Kus: S-Scabberina...
Kus: Did ya forget about not just me, but Maganagi, too?
Sca: I beg you, So-kun. Please stop...
Kus: Scabberina!
Kus: Maganagi, you bastard!
Mag: Kusanagi, it seems your blade isn't the only thing that's gone dull.
Mag: That girl hasn't forgotten a thing.
Mag: She hasn't forgotten anything about you or me.
Mag: She just never knew.
Kus: She never knew? What do ya mean?
Mag: Haven't you figured it out yet?
Mag: That scabbard isn't yours or mine.
Mag: It's your daughter, Scarlett.
Kus: Say what?
Tet: What does he mean, daughter? How do they give birth?
Mag: I don't blame you for mistaking her.
Mag: Scarlett does look exactly like a younger version of her.
Mag: Scabberina was already pregnant with your daughter when you were separated.
Mag: And she raised her all by herself,
Mag: believing that you three would live as a family again one day.
Mag: But she was a single mother.
Mag: It wasn't easy for a scabbard without a sword to protect her child.
Mag: So she chose to survive by housing all kinds of other swords,
Mag: even if it meant betraying her husband.
Mag: But by then, she was already drained and exhausted.
Kus: Wh-Why? Why do ya know all this?!
Mag: Isn't that obvious? It's because I saved her from the hell she was in.
Mag: In the place of a dullard who never came to help her,
Mag: I freed Scabberina from her suffering.
Kus: D-Don't tell me, ya...
Mag: The reason I'm here right now is to keep my promise to her.
Sca: I don't care what happens to me.
Sca: But please help those two meet.
Sca: Even just one look will do. Let him see his daughter alive and well.
Sen: One look? Do I seem that heartless to you?
Mag: I'll bring your entire family together.
Mag: All three of you can meet in my belly.
Kus: Maganagi, you...
Gin: K-Kusanagi!
Gin: Don't tell me, back then?
Gin: Didn't I tell you? From the moment you tricked me, your fates were sealed.
Kus: W-Wait, Maganagi!
Mag: Fret not. I'll send your daughter after you at once.
Mag: Resent your own dull blade if you must.
Mag: Curse your foolishness for daring to defy me, Maganagi.
Kus: Don't!
Kus: Stop it, Maganagi!
Kus: Stop it, Maganagi!
Kus: Leave her alone!
Kus: Leave our... Leave our daughter alone!
Shin: Kusanagi-san!
Mag: This is the end...
Mag: I can't move?
Oki: Hold up. You're jumping the g*n.
Oki: It's too early to go back into the scabbard.
Mag: Y-You...
Kon: S-Sogo?
Mag: How are you still here? I consumed your mind!
Mag: Th-The scabbard's... This can't be.
Mag: I, Maganagi, cannot control this man?
Oki: The duel isn't over yet.
Oki: They're not done yet.
Mag: What are you...
Mag: What do you plan to do withjust that rotting, dull blade?
Mag: Kusanagi is already dead. Everything is all over.
Mag: The scabbard he was looking for is long gone, too.
Mag: You people lost to me, Maganagi.
Gin: Oh, but there's a scabbard right here.
Gin: Can't you see it?
Gin: Can't you see the scabbard that continued to protect her sword even when separated?
Gin: Can't you see this great scabbard thatprotected her husband and daughter to the end?
Gin: No matter how many times his blade crumbles away,
Gin: his soul doesn't have a single scratch on it.
Gin: With a true masterpiece,even if its blade chips away,
Gin: it can be reforged over and over as long as its core doesn't break.
Gin: It can be reborn over and over as long as it's doused in flames.
Gin: The flame hasn't gone out, Kusanagi.
Gin: My flame of life is still burning bright!
Kag: Gin-chan!
Mag: I-Impossible! He stuck the sword into his own butt?
Mag: C-Could that man be...
Gin: I'll let you suck me dry one last time, dumbass.
Gin: Drink as much of my boiling blood as you want!
Mag: No! He's feeding his own blood to Kusanagi?!
Mag: Is he trying to revive the sword?
Mag: Doesn't that man care about his own life?
Oki: He's such a messed-up samurai.
Oki: Forget protecting himself with a sword.
Oki: He himself became a scabbard that protects his sword.
Oki: Interesting.
Oki: Boss really
Oki: is interesting.
Kon: S-Sogo!
Mag: Wh-What are you doing?!
Oki: A duel has to be fair, or it'll be boring.
Oki: You can dig in if you're hungry, too.
Oki: If you can consume me, that is.
Mag: Fine! I'll devour every last bit of you!
All: Gin-san!
Bo: Sogo!
Shin: Gin-san... Okita-san...
Kus: Maganagi, looks like we both found ourselves some fine scabbards.
Mag: No doubt.
Mag: Looks like I was the dull one all along...
Gin: You...
Oki: Boss, let's fight with no distractions next time.
Shin: Gin-san! Kusanagi-san!
Kag: You did it! You really did it!
Shin: You won! Kusanagi-san won!
Kus: Yeah. It's all thanks to ya guys.
Kus: Thank ya so much for makin' mea masterpiece right at the very end.
Shin: K-Kusanagi-san?
Shin: How? Why?
Kus: It's fine. I've been runnin' on fumes for a long time.
Kus: I was always prepared for this.
Kus: Scabberina laid down her life ta protect our daughter.
Kus: If I didn't do the same,how could I face her in heaven?
Shin: Why are you being so negative?
Shin: You finally met your daughter!
Shin: Are you gonna leave her behind without introducing yourself?!
Kus: She grew up inta a fine woman.She really is just like Scabberina.
Kus: I got ta see that beautiful scabbard with my own eyes one more time.
Kus: I'm satisfied with that.
Kus: She shouldn't have ta live with the death of a dad who she'd never seen before.
Kus: She shouldn't need ta bear that cross.
Kus: As long as she lives strong with a smile on her face,
Kus: that's enough for Scabberina and me.
Kus: So please...
Kus: I beg ya...
Kus: Could ya put me ta rest in that lump of ironsand?
Kus: In that excaliburling grave,where I'm sure Scabberina's resting, too.
Kag: Kusanagi...
Kag: Gin-chan.
Gin: Even if you don't exchange any words,
Gin: even when you're far apart,
Gin: there are some things you just can't sever.
Gin: Not by such a dull sword, anyway.
Gin: You guys will always be connected.And we'll always be connected to you.
Kus: Gintoki-han, thank you.
Kus: I'm truly glad I got ta meet scabbards like you in the end.
Smithy,Sign: Smithy
Sac: Gee, So-kun, are you really gonna buy a new sword for me?
Oki: Maybe 'cause I kept wielding strange swords,
Oki: I don't feel like using a normal one anymore.
Oki: You too, right? An ordinary Kikuichimonji can't satisfy you anymore, right?
Oki: You'd prefer one with pearls or one that vibrates, right?
Sac: Eek, So-kun, you perv.
Tet: I'm sorry, but we don't sell such filthy swords.
Oki: That so?
Oki: And here I thought you picked up some pearls.
Oki: Ever since that day, the four of you
Oki: were stuck to the ground there,desperately picking up something.
Tet: It was just gravel.
Tet: But mixed in with that gravel is iron that's far more valuable than pearls.
Tet: I'm going to use it all to forge a sword.
Oki: That sounds like a pain.
Oki: Well, let me know when you're done.
Tet: Are you sure?
Tet: I bet it's going to be the dullest sword in the universe.
Oki: Yeah. It doesn't have to cut anything.
Oki: Because I'm sure the sword and scabbard are never gonna leave each other again.
Sneak_Peek,Sign: Sneak Peek
The_Bloody_Shins,Sign: The Bloody Shinsengumi Records
Oki: Hey, Hijikata.
Oki: Go get me some yakisoba bread.
Mit: So-chan!
Mit: Be polite when speaking to your superiors.
Oki: I'm sorry, Sister.
Oki: Hey, Hijikata.
Oki: Go get me some esteemed yakisoba bread.
Mit: Well done.
Hij: Uh, that wasn't all that different.
The_End,Sign: The End
Preview,Sign: Preview
Shin: Otsu-chan will show up next episode!
Shin: You all remember that I'm the captain of the Terakado Otsu fan club, right?
Shin: Right?
Title: Wash Your Hands Before a Handshake
Shin: Next time: "Wash Your Hands Before a Handshake."
Shin: Wash up well, Takachin!
Preview,Shin: Preview
Preview,Sign: Preview
Sign: Beginning Soon
Sign: The Final Arc
Gin: We've got you covered.
Gin: From walking your dog to keeping Earth safe,
Gin: we Odd Jobs will do anything.
Sign: Silver Soul Arc
Sign: Production is smoothly
Sign: you-know-what.
TextR: The final arc was in a situation much like
TextL: a restaurant that doesn't get any orders.
TextR: But it's not like we forgot about it.
TextL: There were just some adult issues at play.
09x08 - The Strongest Sword, and the Dullest Sword
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Japanese manga series where aliens have invaded and taken over feudal Tokyo, an unemployed samurai finds work however he can.
Japanese manga series where aliens have invaded and taken over feudal Tokyo, an unemployed samurai finds work however he can.