07x16 - Don't Miss a Good Bet

[bunniefuu]

He's a travelin' salesman.
That's what he is.

Uh-huh.

'Course, he might even be
from out of state...

Come into town
to do a little fishin'.

Uh-huh.

What do you think
he is, Andy?

I already know.

He's a stranger in town,
not causin' any trouble...

Mindin' his own business.

Well, Andy,
there's nothing wrong

with a fella showing
a little curiosity.

I know.

If a fella ain't curious,
he'll never learn nothin'.

A fella's got a right
to ask questions.

I'm sorry.

That's okay.

I'll go over
and pump him a little

and find out for sure
what he is.

Hmm.

Hey!

Hi.

Well, it sure is nice weather
for a travelin' salesman.

Yeah, it sure is.

You a travelin' salesman?

Huh?

Oh, me? No.

I thought
maybe that's what you was.

Nah.

But it sure is nice weather.

Yeah.

I guess our weather must be
quite a change to you,

comin' from the west.

Yeah, I guess it would be,
if that's where I was from.

It'd be a change
even if you was from the north.

Yeah, it sure would be, but
I'm not from the north either.

Well...our weather's so nice,

it'd be a change
even if you was from the south.

No doubt about it.

Well, I think
I'll go out and enjoy

some of this nice weather
we're havin'.

I'll see you.

Nice talkin' to you.

What'd you find out?

He agrees
we've got nice weather.

There he is again!

He's been in and out of town
all day.

Where's he headed?

He's comin' here.

If I get him in the chair,
I'll make him talk.

Well, hi.

Good to see you again.

Yeah.
Still got that old weather.

How do you do?

Haircut?
No waitin'.

Oh, no.

I'm looking
for Floyd Lawson.

That's me.

My name's George Jones.

Mr. Lawson,
I've been asking around.

People tell me

you're one of the most
successful businessmen in town.

They do?

Well, oh, yes.

I've got
quite an operation here...

Big volume,

secretary of the downtown
businessmen's club.

I'm a businessman, too.

Oh? Good.

Um, actually, Mr. Lawson,

I was hoping
that I could speak to you alone.

Alone?

Anything you got to say
to Floyd

you can say in front of me.

We're real close friends.

Well, um...
Well, who knows?

This might be something
for you, too.

I'll lay it
right on the line.

Either of you fellas interested
in a business proposition?

I'll admit...
It's a gamble,

but it could pay off big...
Real big.

Like $ , .

Uh...count me in.

Me too.

All I need is or men
to put in $ apiece.

What for?

To rent
some digging equipment...

A bulldozer,
a skip loader.

I don't know
whether you know it or not,

but you people in Mayberry
have a $ , treasure

buried out there
about miles from town.

Oh...so that's it.

What's so funny?

You talkin'
about the Ross treasure?

That's right.
I checked on it.

It's government land...
Finders keepers.

Why?
What do you know about it?

What do we know?

You'd be just wastin'
your time, Mr. Jones.

People been huntin' for that
off and on

ever since the civil w*r.

Why, you can't take a walk
out in that country

without somebody fallin'
in a hole.

I'd forget it, Mr. Jones.

Ain't nobody
ever gonna find that.

I might.

Why you?

I've got a map.

Map?
Where'd you get it?

Well, I'll tell you
the whole story.

Now, it all started
about three months ago.

A great-aunt of mine
passed away.

See, I was out west
at the time,

and I got this telegram,
so I went right home.

Then yesterday
I came to Mayberry,

and I checked it out.

Can we see the map?

Ah, there's the rub...

If I show it to you,

you'll know
where the treasure is.

Well, I'm not buyin'
a pig in a poke.

Well, me neither.
Huh!

Well...

Well, maybe you're right.

I guess I can't expect anyone
to go in with me

if I don't show it to 'em.

Tell you what... I'll go over
to the hotel and get it.

And if you'd like, we can take
a ride out there right now.

We'll wait right here
on you.

Good.

Take it easy.
Don't hurt yourself, boy.

I'm gonna tell Andy.

Yeah. We're gonna need
more capital.

Tell him we'll work him in
for a piece of the action.

Right.

Now, this is different.

This fella's got a map.

"It's different.
This fella's got a map."

This great-aunt of his
is a descendant

of one of them Ross's raiders.

Oh, sure, sure.

Who were
the Ross's raiders, pa?

Oh, they were a group of men
during the civil w*r.

And when his great-aunt died,

he found this map hid
in the family Bible.

Anybody could make up
a story like that.

Andy, if they've got
a family Bible,

he's bound to come
from good stock.

You beat everything, goob.
You just beat everything.

What did
the Ross's raiders do, pa?

They were a group of men
during the civil w*r...

Andy, you comin' out there
with us or not?

No, I'm not
comin' out there.

And if I were you,

I wouldn't have anything
to do with this either.

Man comes in town,
you know him minutes...

What can you know
about him?

Well, we're not puttin' up
our money

till we check out the map.

You don't think
we're easy marks, do you?

Well...

I've got to go.

And if you don't want
a piece of the action,

that's your hard luck.

I don't want
a piece of the action.

Well, hard luck.

Can I go with him, pa?

No, you can't go with him.
You stay here.

Who were
the Ross's raiders, pa?

They were a group of men
during the civil w*r,

and they weren't
on either side,

and they just went around
stealin' stuff.

And once, they stole
a big payroll

from a union troop train...
Over $ , in gold.

Wow!

Yep,
union troops came after 'em

and surrounded 'em,

and so the raiders
buried the treasure.

Then they were captured
and given life sentences.

And they say the treasure
is still up there somewhere.

$ , ?!

That's right.

Boy, sure would like
to have a piece of that action.

There's the big rock.
It's marked right here.

There are the three oak trees
and the waterfall.

See, the whole thing
makes a perfect triangle.

Let me see.
Careful!

Oh, it sure is old.
It's all yellow and everything.

Well, it's
more than years old.

Well, looks like
the treasure's here some place,

don't it, George?

You can call me goober.

You can drop
the "Lawson," too.

It's Floyd,
after my mother's brother.

Fine.
It's right in here somewhere.

A lot of ground.

That's why we need
the digging equipment.

What's the deal again?

Hmm?

Oh, I take %,

the investors
split the other .

What do you think, Floyd?

Okay, I'll put up $ .

Me too.

Good.

Well, that leaves us
with only $ to go.

We'll raise it.

You're down there
some place,

and we're gonna get you
out of there.

Oh, it's the same old story.

The fella could have heard
about the treasure,

made the whole thing up,

then when he gets his hands
on the money, he could scoot.

There's always somebody trying
to make money the easy way.

Are you sayin'
he's dishonest?

No, I'm not saying
he's dishonest.

I'm saying he might be.

I'll get it.

Hey, Andy!

Andy, I gotta talk to you.

We're just havin' supper.

That's okay.
I'm not hungry.

Hey, everybody.

Me and Floyd just got back
from Hopkins creek.

We checked out the map,
and that's the place, all right.

No two ways about it.

Mmm.

Oh, sorry.

Sit down, goober.

That's the greatest business
opportunity I have ever seen.

Even Floyd says so.

Goober, Andy
was just telling us about it,

and he thinks
it's a little chancy.

There's nothin' chancy
about it.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Now that we got the map...

It's old and yellow
and crumpled and everything.

Well, how much money
does it involve, goober?

$ to rent
the digging equipment.

That's what I come
to talk to you about.

Course, I don't want to
interrupt your supper.

We need some more investors.

Can I invest, pa?

Oh, we need
big investors, ope.

Well, what do you say, Andy?

The investors split up
$ , .

If we get ,
that's $ , apiece.

Well, what do you say,
Andy?

You want some supper?

No, thanks.

Well, what do you say,
Andy?!

No, goob, no, no!
Last time... no!

I just, uh...
Tryin' to do you a favor,

but if you
ain't interested...

Well, I'll be goin'.

I'll let myself out.

You see?

Now, there's goober.
He works hard for his money.

Then a crazy thing like this
comes along,

and he's ready to blow $ ...
Floyd, too.

They've always been
so conservative.

Shows what greed will do.

Changes a person completely.

Now, let's have
our dessert and coffee

in the living room, hmm?

Okay.

Here we go.

Finish up your milk, ope.

There we go.

Everybody have enough?

Mm-hmm.
Plenty, thank you.

Well, I'll get the cake
if you pour the coffee.

Oh, fine.

Interesting thing,
that treasure, hmm?

Oh, yes.

Ridiculous to put
any money in it.

Oh, well,
they may never find it.

How much did he say...
$ , ?

To each investor.

Well...he could be crooked.

Oh, no doubt about it.

You want to go in on it?

Why not?
We only live once, hmm?

Shh!

Uh, Mr. Jones?

Yes?

We were told
we'd find you here.

Oh, yes.

Well, I-I sort of use this
as my office.

May we?

Yes, please.

I'm miss bee Taylor,
and this is miss Helen crump.

Hello.

Well, we might as well
come to the point.

We're gamblers.

You are?

Well, not in the
accepted sense,

but we're, uh, interested
in your project.

We heard about it
from goober pyle.

Oh, yes, yes...Goober.

Well, could you, uh, tell us
something about the deal?

Well, it looks good.

But you've got to remember...

Things like this are a gamble.

There's no guarantee.

Oh, well,
we're aware of that.

Well, I guess
that covers everything.

Here you are.

Here.

Um...

Well, I-I feel a little funny

about taking money from women.

Don't think of us as women.

Think of us as investors.

I guess we should get
a receipt, though, hmm?

They wouldn't mean much.

I could take your money
and leave town

in the middle of the night,
couldn't I?

Mutual trust then, hmm?

That's right.

Well, I like
to do business like that.

Well,
when do we start digging?

Tomorrow morning
I'll rent the equipment.

It's a shame, though,
because for another bucks,

we could really do this job
right.

Well, we'll keep it touch.

Bye!
Goodbye!

And, uh, good luck to us.

Good luck!

I think
we handled it pretty well.

I think we did.

I'm sure he knows we're someone
to be reckoned with.

He still needs another $ .

Well,
why don't we ask Andy?

Well, why not?

All he can do
is scream his lungs out.

You mean to tell me that you two
went in on that crazy thing?!

Andy,
keep your voice down.

Two reasonably intelligent women
with limited funds...

$ apiece.

Well, Andy...

I know you're not loaded,

and here's you... a teacher
with a college education!

That's got nothing to do
with it.

I'll bet even Einstein
had a fling now and then.

I give up.
I just give up.

You're into it now.
You've given him your money.

I mean, there's no more to say.

Well, Andy, we didn't come here

to discuss our participation.

What did you come here for?

He's still short bucks.
You want to come in on it?

No, he doesn't.

Shall we go, Helen?

Let's.

How's it going to feel mingling
with the rich people, Andy?

Thought about
what you're gonna do

with the $ ,
when we hit?

Probably get
my own gas station...

One of them big places.

Hire somebody to run it,

and I'd just drop by
a couple of times a week,

collect the cash.

In your fancy clothes.

Yeah...

One of them black suits

that kinda glistens
when the sun hits it.

Mighty nifty.

How 'bout you?

Me?

Well, I'd push out the shop
in the back,

and I'd turn it
into a -chair shop.



Yep. The big time.

chairs in this town...

You think you could fill 'em?

Well, who cares?

All I want is the chairs.

I'll still be
the only barber.

Hey...

It's real fun
bein' rich, ain't it?

It's the only way to fly.

Hi, guys.

Hey, Andy.

Sit down.

Just sittin' here talkin' about
what we're gonna do

with the money
when it comes through.

Well,
too late to say any more.

Now that you got your money up,
that's it.

Well, now that aunt bee
and Helen's in on it,

we might go ahead
with just the $ .

He'll rent as much equipment
as he can.

Well, all I can say
is good luck.

There's still $ open.
Then we can do the thing right.

No, goob.

Well, when it does
come through... $ , .

It'll set you up
for life, Andy.

Well, it's not up to me
to tell you fellas what to do.

I mean, you're in it,
and that's that.

But so far as I'm concerned,
I work hard for my money.

And any investment I make

is gonna have to be a lot safer
than this one.

But, Andy, this is a chance
to make a bundle.

And all of a sudden,
you're rich.

Sounds good, goob,
but it's not for me.

I'll see ya.

He's gonna get the equipment and
start diggin' in the morning,

in case you change your mind.

No, Floyd.

Hi.

Hi.

Oh, I'm...
I'm sheriff Taylor.

Oh.

Taylor, hmm...
I met a woman named Taylor.

Oh, that's my aunt...
Aunt bee.

Very nice lady.

Yes, thank you.
May I, uh...

Oh, yeah, please.

Would you like
something to eat?

Oh, no, thanks.

I, uh, understand

you might start diggin'
tomorrow.

Yeah.

Of course, I'm cutting it
kind of close moneywise.

What I mean is, I'd like to rent
the equipment for longer

to do the job right,

but, uh, well, that's the way
the cookie crumbles.

You know what I mean.

Yeah.

Uh, George...

It is George, isn't it?

Yes... George Jones.

You know, sheriff,
you got a wonderful town here.

Oh, yeah.
Thank you.

Nice people, nice weather,
nice everything.

We like it.
We like it.

Kind of a town a man
could really settle down in.

You know, the time comes
in every person's life

when you...
Well, you know what I mean.

George...
Yeah?

Now, like you say,

uh, you're gonna start diggin'
tomorrow anyway,

and I'd was wondering
if you'd be interested

in, uh, that extra $ .

You?
You want to come in with us?

Well, I've been toying
with it.

You know, that's funny.

Well, I would think
that a man like you

would think it'd be too much
of a risk.

Well, I did.
I felt that way.

But, uh, there comes a time
in everybody's life

when...you got to go.

You know,
that's exactly how I feel.

Yeah.

But, uh, sheriff, you know,
this thing... it's a gamble.

There's no guarantee.

Oh, I know that.
I know that.

But, um...

I sure would like to have
a piece of the action.

Okay.

Okay, here's...

There's $ .

I'll go to the bank
and get the rest.

All right.

Oh, oh!

Just, uh, one thing...

Uh, I'd appreciate it

if you wouldn't mention
to anybody

that I'm one
of the investors.

Just, you know, kind of keep it
on the q.T. Until we hit.

Oh, yeah, sure.

I'll be right back.

Yeah, boy, oh, boy!

Mmm, what a mornin'
for diggin'.

It's perfect.
How's he gonna work it?

He's gonna bring
the skip loader out first.

We'll start in the middle
of the triangle

and work our way out.

Oh, that makes a lot of sense.
What time you got?

: , but he's got a long run
from that rental place.

But he ought to be here
soon.

Yep.

I can't wait
to get started.

Big moment
in our lives, goober.

Could really change
everything.

: yet?

Just about.

Must have hit
some heavy traffic.

Yeah, you can't move one
of them skip loaders too fast.

No, they'll slow you down.

Yeah.

If he'd carried that skip loader
on his back,

he'd have been here by now.

What are you thinkin',
Floyd?

How many haircuts there are
in $ .

Are you sure you don't want
a round

no, thanks.

On his way to Florida.

Bought a one-way ticket.

I had a feeling
he was a crook all the time.

We should have listened
to Andy.

The only one around here
that's got any sense.

Yes.

Andy somehow always seems
to know what's right.

Andy...

Well, what's all this?

Oh, Andy,
you were so right.

He was a crook.
He just skipped town.

Skipped town?

We were just saying
we should have listened to you.

He skipped town...
With the money?

Look at him.

Now, there's a true friend...

Feels as bad about it
as if he'd lost his own money.

I'm glad you ain't the type
to rub it in, Andy,

'cause you could sure do
some rubbin'.

There's some consolation.

At least we have
one smart person around.

Yeah.

Our money's gone,

but old Andy knows
right where his is, right, Andy?

Yeah, well...

Yeah, they caught him

just as he was gettin' off
the train in Miami.

I'm so glad.

After the way
we trusted him.

And the money?

Yeah, what about that?

It was all on him.

Oh!oh!
Oh!oh!

Oh, I'm so relieved!

Are we getting it back?

Yeah. Accordin' to the wire,

they're sendin' us $
right away.

Oh, isn't that wonderful?

$ ?

I thought it was
just the four of us in on it.

Was anybody else in on this
besides us, Andy?

Well, uh...

Yes, Andy?

Uh...

I'll ask around.