Single Bells (1998)

[bunniefuu]

No.

No.

No.

I'm sorry, no! I have no work for you.
The team is full.

The team is complete!

No one is needed. No assistant,
no lighting man, no one.

Excuse me?

I am mean?

Right. These people don't
want you, you understand?

No, not even if you offer a discount.

What? Yes. Hello!

as*h*le!

- 2:00 p.m., vacation starts!
- Merry Christmas.

- That's so sweet of you, all that trouble...
- Merry Christmas!

Hello!

Ricki, what are you doing?

- Hello!
- Hello!

I wanted to show him to you.

Ooh, is he sweet!

Coo-eee!

- His name is Christoph.
- Christoph, the Christ-child!

- May I?
- Yes, lift him out.

Be careful...

- Look, he already looks at me!
- How old is he?

Agency Treichl.
Not again...! Shh!

Jörg, you're ridiculous.

No, we won't work with you anymore.

OK, so go to the competition!

- That's Aunt Kathi.
- Now leave me alone!

Men!

But you won't be like that, right?

You won't turn into a macho man!

- What do I do if he has diarrhea?
- Change diapers.

These drops will help.

- But couldn't it be that...?
- No, it could not.

Now please go.

I'll be back on January 7.
Merry Christmas! Buh buh!

- Do you like children?
- Of course, or I wouldn't be here!

Yes, that's right.

One has to keep them healthy, I guess.
Even if they spit and bite.

You're now going on vacation for 2 weeks.

There are enough children there!

- But they won't be my problem.
- Oh, doctor.

You are a born father.
But I know, you're in no hurry.

The plane tickets.

December 24, 10 p.m.
Vienna - Mauritius.

- How long is the flight?
- 11 hours.

Christmas on a plane. That doesn't
bother you? And Miss Kathi?

- No stress, no sentimentality.
- No presents?

Well, Mauritius is present enough.
Kathi and I are agreed. Presents!

Here's a little something.
I have to run, the stores close soon.

Can I hold him too?

I think it would be nice, a little bairn.

When you can watch it grow.

Who knows, in a year...

What then?

Well, I wasn't going to say anything yet.
Stefan and I are getting married.

- What? When?
- In January. In Venice.

Stefan wants it to be romantic.
On the Grand Canal, in a gondola.

- All in white.
- In a church?

Yes. I hope you will all come!

In January? You tell me only now?

- Do you have to?
- No, what do you think.

I thought I'd tell you
after the vacation.

I'll stay on, too,
until you find someone.

You're quitting?

Well, Stefan says that
I don't need to work anymore.

He earns good money.

He'd rather I was only there for him.
And anyway, we soon want...

And we... We'll be the only ones left.

Come on, Kathi won't get married.

How can you say that?

And give up everything you've built up?

You can be a wife and still have a job.

- In a real family, the wife stays home.
- Not me.

- True, you fly to Mauritius!
- Mauritius?

I can't imagine Christmas in the south.

On the beach, under palm trees?
There is no Christmas mood.

We, Jonas and me, think that
Christmas is outdated.

But Kathi!

- That's not necessary.
- That's too much.

- I like Christmas.
- Agency Treichl-

Jörg, I don't have a job for you.

Thanks, up yours too!

I can't take it anymore. Everyone
wants a job. And I'm the mean one!

I've had enough for this year.

I have to buy a Barbie doll
for my little sister.

You do that, I'm not giving up my dolls.

I'm saving my Barbie dolls for Christoph.
Do you think he'll play with them?

Sure. Buy him the "Shave-Me Ken".

Thank you.

No, I'm just browsing.

♪ Oh come little children ♪
♪ Oh come, one and all! ♪

♪ Come all to the manger ♪
♪ in Bethlehem's stable. ♪

♪And see what joy in this... ♪

♪ most holy night... ♪
Finally!

This year I've really earned it.

What are you drinking?

Shame on you!

What can I say?

The chickenpox broke out.

Of all things!

High time we get out of here, or I can
forget about my vacation. Chickenpox!

And everyone runs to the doctor.

Jonas, I want a child.

- You want what?
- A child.

And I also want to get married.

Why? Are you pregnant?

Thank God.

That would be stupid.

Right, and now...

Now it's time to pack.

Leave half of it here.
You always buy too much.

Kathi, what's wrong?

I want to get married and have kids.

More than one?

- What's this nonsense?
- I'm serious.

I'm 35 and have been working
all my life. I've seen it all.

I don't miss out on anything.
I want a family.

So!

Now... you want a family.

How do you imagine that?

Very simply. We get married, and then...

- I mean that's not a problem, is it?
- But it is.

Why?

Because I don't want a family.

I guess that I am to be
the lucky one, right?

But we've been living
together for 8 years!

Exactly!

We're living together. We're living!
But married and with children?

That's no life anymore.

No rest, no travels, no sex, no time...

- I thought you loved me.
- Of course I do!

That's why I don't want to get married.
So spare me.

- We're happy, aren't we?
- I want to get married!

Now you've done it.

I've been looking forward to Mauritius
for months. And now this bullshit!

Kathi, please forget it.
And after the vacation...

- There won't be a vacation.
- What?

Either you propose to me
right now, or I'm not going.

That's ridiculous.
I won't be blackmailed.

- Where is it coming from, this idea?
- It's Christmas.

Oh, Christmas.

I get it: Celebration of love, family,
Christmas tree, angel hair...

- What's wrong with that?
- Nothing.

But I can't stand all that phony fuss.
And neither can you.

At least until today.

Katharina!

Well, isn't that something?

I'll even decorate a palm
tree for Christmas.

You don't understand. I don't want a
Christmas tree, I want to get married!

All right.

But not to me.

I can't right now. Who is it?

Your sister. She's crying.

Hello, Kathi?

Kathile, what's wrong?

Damn you!

Hello?

I don't mean you, Kathi.

What?!

That's the last straw!

Pack a bag and come to us!

He can't be against it.
His mother's here too.

We'll have a wonderful party.

Stop bawling and come!

I have to get back. What?

Linzer Eyes. Bye!

Joe? Joe!

- Daddy is in the forest with Omama.
- Why?

Don't, that's unhealthy!

Omama says: it gives you worms.

And this one? How about this one?

Much too small.

It's beautiful.

That's the size, at 8 years.

My God, if Pop could see this!

He planted all the trees himself,
with his own hands.

There were 300 trees.

They were this small. Like this!

He planted them all himself.

- He enjoyed doing it.
- Yes. But it was a lot of work.

And the trees weren't cheap.

Lilibeth paid for half of them,
I paid for the other half.

I know! Dad and I couldn't afford
them on our small pensions.

But hard work still counts, doesn't it?

- Lilibeth didn't bend over 300 times.
- Neither did you.

And Papa was happy to be out here alone.

What do you mean?

That he wanted to be without me?

Are you blaming me for not being able
to bend over? I've done enough hauling.

I never had help like Lilibeth.

And when her husband died,
she inherited.

Not like me.

Mama, we want a Christmas tree.
So please, make up your mind!

It's a pity, these beautiful trees!

What do you mean?

We'll climb up, and you'll
cut one from there.

I didn't plant Christmas trees
to end up stealing one!

Stealing... nobody will see.

And no one will think a master
builder would do such a thing.

- You know who's coming? Aunt Kathi.
- With Jonas?

- "Uncle" Jonas?
- No, he's flying to Mauritius.

- Why?
- None of your business.

Now open the oven. Come on, hurry!

Help me with the room for aunt Kathi.

Always the boring stuff!

You, there!

Much too big.

Too big? It's just right.

That tree is at least 3.5 m high!

So what? Just trim the top.

- We'll put an angel on it anyway.
- No.

You're spoiling all my joy.

I'm so seldom with you,
and I'm not even allowed to...

I can see that no one
is happy about me!

But you only get one Omama.

And who knows for how long.
You'll all be sorry!

Please, not again!

So this one?

♪ O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree! ♪
♪How loyal are your needles.♪

No, not like that!

Hansl, that's wrong! It is wrong!

What is wrong?

You must cut from the other side.

I know that! Papa always said,
you have to cut from the other side.

- There by the branches...
- Mom, leave me alone! Please!

Not everything I say is wrong,
just because I'm old.

I have experience - valuable experience.

- Hey, Hansi, look there!
- What?

- What is it?
- Look over there.

Isn't that tree nicer?

It looks denser.

- Mama, are you mocking me?
- I'm just saying.

- I like it better.
- But I don't!

- Oops! The ranger!
- What is it?

The ranger!

Duck! Duck!

Ow!

♪ O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree ♪

Just what I needed.

I told you: The tree is too thick.

All right.

If you really want to, Kathi...

so be it.

Kathi!

Kathi, if...

Katharina!

"Don't look for me, K."

"K dot." Stupid goose!

"Don't look for me."
Don't make me laugh!

And so it's over.

Where are you going?

- None of your business!
- It is!

Don't touch me!

Right!

This is how it ends?
Now I'm the bad guy?

I was still good enough then?!
You let me pay for that!

I didn't ask you to.

I pay enough myself.

Yeah? Like what, if I may ask?

This apartment, for example.
You moved in with me, back then.

We can change that right away.

Your parents will be happy
when the boy comes back.

Your mother doesn't like me.

- What's my mother got to do with it?
- A lot.

She made you what you are:

An anti-family, career-obsessed
overachiever.

You say that?

You think of nothing else
but your shitty advertising!

You'll take any job, just
because it brings money.

- You have no clue.
- No!

I don't have a clue about that.
Thank God!

I'm just a stupid little doctor...

...who has no clue about
the big world of advertising.

What's it about today?
Cough sugar? Toilet paper?

Come to us, we work
day and night!

At dumping prices! We're family-friendly,
not career-obsessed at all!

I'm leaving. When I come back,
I never want to see you again.

- Were people fat before?
- I don't know. Why?

Those naked people are very fat.

That's not for you!

Tell Omama I'll be right there!

And tell her to leave the roast in
the oven and not to touch it! Go!

Mommy said you must
leave the roast alone.

I'm not hurting the roast!

What are you doing?

I'm basting the roast.

- Why?
- To make it soft.

- Mommy doesn't like soft crust.
- But I do.

- She wants it crispy.
- She's got all her teeth.

Don't you?

Don't be so cheeky!

That's how it is at my age.

Why? Lilibeth still has all her teeth.

Because she always brushed them.
That's very important, she says!

Lilibeth could afford a dentist.

- Couldn't you?
- No, not me. I had to save.

Unlike Lilibeth.

- Besides, I don't like it.
- What?

- That you call her Lilibeth.
- What should I call her?

Omama, as it were.

- But you are Omama.
- Granny, then!

Lilibeth is not a granny!
Grannies are old.

Lilibeth is old.

sh*t! sh*t!

We had nothing.
Nothing. Nothing at all.

But one thing was clear:

The boy had his Christmas.
Even if I had to starve for it.

What does that mean?

That Omama scrimped and saved
so that Daddy could have something.

Yes, and Pops.

I always had something for my men.
That was important.

Even if it was just a new shirt.

A shirt? For Christmas?
That's not a present.

- Sissi, shut up and set the table!
- I'll do it.

The little one doesn't know
how it was back then.

Times were hard!

I knew it very well.

♪ O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree ♪
♪ how loyal are your needles. ♪

Ow!

sh*t!

Ow! Ow!

sh*t, g*dd*mn!

f*cking Christmas!

Listen... isn't that a waste?

There are good paper napkins
that you can use more often.

Cloth napkins have to be washed,
and washing powder costs money.

- And pollutes the environment.
- Mommy doesn't like paper napkins.

- There are no band A*DS in this house.
- Hansele!

Did you hurt yourself?

- In the bathroom cabinet, back left.
- There's nothing there.

- It's just a scratch anyway.
- It's a wound.

How did that happen? Wait, I'll bring
you something. Just a minute!

The stupid tree!

- Where is Gregor? I need him.
- He's watching TV.

Gregor!

Gregor!

Gregor!

Right. Now show me your foot.

Funny, it's not crispy yet.

- Omama, we're eating
- Hansl comes first!

Joe, please tell your mother that you
are not seriously hurt. We want to eat.

Mama, it's not that bad. Ow!

Gregor! Where is he -- not so tight!

It's necessary. It's easy
to get blood poisoning.

- Sure, if you wipe with a washcloth!
- Dad, that is Pop...

he once got a piece of slate
stuck under his nail at work.

It was festering.

Sissi, get some water!

And suddenly the nail turned
black, all black, terrible.

His arm got all swollen.

So we went to the hospital, Pops and I.

There they cut him immediately.
Immediately!

Bravo!

Meat? Yuck! You know
that I don't eat that.

Gregor, stop being a vegetarian!

I have veggies in the freezer.
Shall I make you something?

You're spoiling the boy.

You'll eat potatoes, won't you?

I'm not hungry.

Bon appetit.

Son of a b*tch!

The crust is so soft.
I don't know why.

The crust is just right - for me.

Oh, how so?

'Cause I've been basting it.
I can't chew that hard stuff.

But I can.

Luiserl, please!

The crust is just right.
Not too soft and not too hard.

How nice! I still don't like it.

I cooked and cleaned the house.

I always say, it's too much for you.

You're not used to working hard.

Sissi!

What?

Before drinking, after eating,
always give your mouth a wiping.

Good girl! Such a good girl!

When is Aunt Kathi coming?

Kathi? She's going to Mauritio.

Mauritius - and she's not going.

Only Jonas, "uncle" Jonas.
Aunt Kathi is coming here.

Oh, what fun. She's going
to spoil our mood!

How can you say that?

- I know your sister.
- So?

She's always talking business.

Why is she coming?

- She had a fight with Jonas.
- Well, well.

And we have to suffer for it?
On Christmas!

Mama! You don't have to suffer.

My sister has problems
and I'm taking her in.

I wouldn't dare to impose like that.

What do you say, Hansl?

You need your rest, don't you?

- That's all right with Joe, ain't it?
- Yeah. I don't care.

Exactly!

You'll just have to share
the bathroom with her.

- Then I'll get up earlier.
- Thank you. Too kind.

Is that her already?

Ooh, where are you coming from?

Mommy! Look who's here.

Well, what do you say now?

Mommy...!

What are you doing here?

A Christmas surprise!
Was it successful?

You could say that...

I thought it would be nice to
have the whole family together.

Joe, my luggage is in the car.
Be a dear!

No, you stay put.
You've got a wounded foot.

Did something happen?

- Just a scratch.
- Oh, is that all.

- It's serious enough.
- Come, mommy, come!

- It's beautiful! Is it real?
- Of course.

Alright, I can leave. I don't need to
be here if you don't want me.

Mama, nobody did you any harm.
Don't spoil everything.

Me? Why me?

You said we'd be alone. I was
so happy! I never get to see you.

But now it's Kathi and... and her.

She's an Omama too!

An Omama? Lilibeth is an Omama? Ha!

- She's not even a good mother.
- Stop it!

To ambush poor Luiserl like that!

Just waltzes right in.
Uninvited.

And the others can toil.

What's that?

Fritz, my present for Sissi.

- Fritz?
- Fritz the rat.

- What?
- A rat.

Intelligent and clean.
Sissi will be so happy.

- Mommy, that beast stays out of my house!
- Children should grow up with animals.

- We're in the sticks! Cows, chickens...
- Those are victuals.

- My cat will eat the rat.
- Fritz is an indoor rat!

Gregor! Help poor Luiserl!

Gregor!

Are you deaf? Go help
your mother! Now!

What is she up to?
Is she moving in with us?

- Is it Lilibeth?
- You guessed it.

- Hello Kathi!
- Hello!

- Am I dreaming?
- Nope. It is her.

Mommy!

Hi, old man! Don't strain yourself.

Hi, my Fritz, how are you?

Mommy, what are you doing here?

Kathi, aren't you in Mauritius?

Hello, Gregor.
Please put it on the bed.

Hello!

What a sore sight you are.
Terrible, this fashion!

- Tell me, what happened?
- It's over, finished.

- And the flight only leaves tomorrow.
- That's sweet.

Typical Luiserl, so playful...
I don't understand a word.

- What about Jonas?
- I broke up with him.

- He doesn't want to marry me.
- Of course not, you left him!

Now I want to freshen up.

Gregor, where is the suitcase?

Are you here for Christmas?

- Yes. Luiserl invited me.
- Ah.

In fact, this is my room.

Just sleep with the kids.

Or with Omama.
I'm sure it'll be... cozy.

- I think I will be leaving.
- Why?

It's always the same: it's all about her!
Just so long as she gets all the attention!

- Anything else?
- Don't overexert yourself!

Kathi, we'll talk to her.

Take off that stuff, and
help me dry the dishes!

That's not stuff.
That's a mink, a real one.

And we have a dishwasher.

You naughty girl, you!

An ultimatum?!

My daughters demand that I behave?!

Unbelievable. Wonderful!

The insolence!

Here I travel all this way
to make you happy...

And then this!

Mommy, please understand!

I had to invite Omama.
She's all alone.

Am I not alone?

- Mommy, that's different.
- How so?

You always wanted to be alone.
Not like... her.

Do you think I'm happy
when I see her sniveling?

And her whining that Pop isn't alive
anymore, and how miserable she is.

And then you show up in a mink!

And I have a guilty conscience.

But Luiserl, I am your mother.

You can count on me.

I'll be lovely to her. Really lovely.

Now I'd like to be alone and freshen up.

Mommy, I'm warning you:
Do not let THAT into my house.

Yes, Fritzi!

Where is my little one?

- What's in the cage?
- A rat.

- Ugh!
- You said it.

That's one of her ideas.
A present for Sissi.

- I'll let the cat into the room.
- Not before the gift exchange!

Where is Sissi? Who cleaned up?
We weren't finished.

I did the dishes. You were outside.

Hansl is working again. And Sissi is
watching TV with Gregor. Because...

- That's all the boy ever does.
- Hi, Omama!

Careful, my back is hurting.
Greetings!

What did I hear? Jonas left you?

You misheard. I left him.

But why?

How old are you now, 35?
You are quite daring.

I'll just heat THAT up
in the microwave.

Be careful, aren't those
waves dangerous?

My neighbor's grandson
is studying something like that.

A good boy, so hardworking and helpful.

My neighbor is lucky.
She's never alone.

She's always invited to the house
on weekends, even though it's small.

"There's always room for granny,"
says the boy.

Mitzerl!

Mitzerl, forgive me...

for being so hectic.
I didn't greet you properly.

The long drive at night.
But now I am like new.

Driving is exhausting at our age,
even in the passenger seat.

Be so kind, give me a drink.

No, no thanks.
Thank you anyway.

- Nothing heavy in the evening.
- Give me some potatoes.

- It would be a pity.
- I have no appetite.

New napkins, what a waste!

The crust is soft, don't you think?

Yes, well...

Say Mitzi, how are you?

We haven't seen each other in ages.
When did we last meet? Wait...

I stayed in Sicily for Easter,
then at Maureen's in London.

Maureen's house is an absolute dream!
It is so tasteful!

Everything matches, from
the carpets to the paintings.

And wonderful English furniture.
Luiserl, you simply must go visit her!

She doesn't have a guest room
like here, but a guest apartment!

- I'm afraid we don't.
- That's all right, children.

It will do, it's just for a few days.

Ah yes, the highlight is her garden.
Almost like in Sissinghurst.

Like where?

Sissinghurst, the famous white garden.

I think white flowers are dull.

How can you say that,
have you been there?

See. But I have, and Maureen's
garden is very similar indeed.

She has a heavenly gardener.

And she still has servants...

- Speaking of which, where do I sleep?
- There's plenty of room with the kids.

- What do you mean?
- The rooms are very large.

It is important that children have
enough space. They need it to thrive.

Hansl always slept in the cabinet.
That's all the space we had.

And he still got his diploma.

Sure, Mitzerl.

One can also live simply.
Fortunately, one doesn't have to.

And... a small chamber is certainly
not good for development.

Yes, it's wonderful at Maureen's: every
grandchild's room opens to the garden.

Each comes with its own flower bed.
And those flower beds are so well kept!

- Each has their own gardener...
- No, the children are in charge.

Maureen always says:
Flowers educate the soul.

Or something like that. Planting flowers
is preferable to watching television.

Maureen doesn't even have a TV.
Television corrupts the mind.

Some shows are very good, like
those who advise senior citizens.

Very useful. Really, you can
learn a lot from them.

Mitzerl, you know this better than me.

I have far too many other interests.
I read, for instance.

Mommy, please!

I think reading trains the mind.

It's very important at a certain age.
Maureen learns...

...a stanza of a poem every day.
A heavenly idea!

Watch this. Uh...

The tyrant Dionys to seek,
Stern Moerus with his poniard crept.

The watchful guard upon him swept.

The grim king marked his changeless cheek:
"What wouldst thou with thy poinard? Speak!"

"The city from the tyrant free!"
"The death-cross shall thy guerdon be."

Well Mitzerl, what comes next?

- I never learned that in school!
- You just forgot it.

That's what Maureen says:
It's the Alzheimer thing.

We're going to bed.

- Good night!
- Good night.

Good night, children!

Where was I?
Oh, yes. At Alzheimer's.

- Shut it!
- Out!

- He doesn't even has a bed!
- Neither does Sissi. Hammocks are "in"!

- You sleep with me.
- And Joe?

Joe will find a place.

- Joe, are you crazy?
- No, but...

The tree is too big, it won't fit.
I'll get a new one.

Uh, Joe. Now Omama and
Kathi are here and my mother...

- Ta-ta-ta.
- I can't help it.

It's my family.

Would you please sleep with the kids?

What?

Well, I can't put your mother
or mine with the children.

And Kathi is not well.
I haven't seen her in months.

That's why she must sleep in my bed?

You could do me that favor.
I did invite your mother.

Why of course! If you consider it
a favor that I don't sleep in your bed.

By the way, your mother came uninvited.

I know, Joe. Do you think
I'm enjoying this?

I just hope she doesn't
get too involved tomorrow.

It wouldn't be the first time!

I promised Omama she
could decorate the tree.

What?

Yes! She planted the trees
with Papa. Eight years ago.

- Almost all of them died.
- Don't be childish!

It makes her happy, and you...

And me? I don't need happiness?

Luiserl, please! I promised her.

Fine. As you wish.

Thank you kindly!

Let's not fight over that stupid tree!

It's not about the tree! Oh...

Christmas happens more often...

Mitzerl, I am going to take a bath.
Since you are still busy.

A hot bath will do me good.

And tomorrow morning,
please let me sleep in. I need it.

- Good night, Mitzerl!
- Good night.

- I'm going now.
- Good night!

Tell me all from the beginning.

- Is something wrong?
- I said, "I'm going now."

Yep! Sleep well, but not here!

No, he doesn't mind. Now tell me!

♪ Softly falls the snow ♪

- Yes?
- Do you need much longer?

I haven't even started yet!

I'll call you when I'm done.

Hey, what are you doing
under the desk? In my room?

Hey is for horses. And if you don't
clean up, there won't be a Christmas!

- Why are you being so rude?
- I'm mad.

- At me?
- No, at the world.

Now shut up and let me sleep!

- But to give up everything?
- Do you think I'm wrong?

You have it good: a husband,
two kids, a big house...

And a mother-in-law.

She's nice, just a little different.

- You could say that!
- I don't think she's that bad.

- She helps you, unlike mommy.
- She doesn't help, she interferes.

You're petty.
I wish I had a mother-in-law.

Just a second, Mitzerl.

Five more minutes.

But I have to go so urgently!

Mitzerl, why didn't you say so?

- What time is it?
- Eleven thirty.

Already? Time for bed.

- I wish Jonas all the worst.
- Because he doesn't want to marry you?

It's not so funny to be married.
Your life will change.

Yes it's nice with Joe, but
only because I'm holding back.

Meaning...?

First comes Joe, then the kids.
Nobody cares about me.

- You exaggerate. Joe is a treasure.
- Sure!

- But one that needs looking after.
- You like doing that!

I do.

But sometimes, I'd rather be alone.

Work at a publishing house,
and live in the city. Like you.

And if I don't want to cook,
I can eat at the sushi bar.

And sleep in.

You're crazy. You don't have
a problem, I do.

Like I just said:
Nobody cares about me!

I'm glad I have you. Now sleep,
tomorrow comes the Christ-child.

Already?!

- What time is it?
- Quarter past six.

Are you crazy? Sleep!

I hear something!

What are you doing?

As you can see - I'm making pancakes.

Yes, I see it. And why?

- Didn't Hansl tell you?
- Didn't Joe tell me what?

We had so many guests!

Turn this sh*t off at once!

Joe! I have to talk to you, now!

I only say 'pancake'.
Now choose: it's her or me!

Me.

- What's that smell?
- Pancakes.

Wonderful, I'm coming!

Joe, would you go to the village
to pick up the carp?

Joe, do you hear?

See how he likes it.
Just like Hansl.

Sometimes he would eat 10 pieces,
that is, if we had so many.

We always fasted
on Christmas day. Until now.

How silly, when remember your
whining. Mitzerl, I thank you!

What did you have for lunch?

Not much, just goose soup
with dumplings.

And curd strudel.

But in the evening,
after the presents...

-- which was always at 5 o'clock,
so that Hansi wouldn't tire out --

-- after the presents,
we always had a goose.

Always, no matter the cost.

So Joe, will you fetch
the carp with me?

The carp?

I told you, Luiserl, Omama is
taking care of everything today.

We bought a goose. A big fat one.

It's in the pantry. As a surprise.

So to speak.

You wanted to surprise me?

With... a goose?

A... fat one?

So you don't have to work so hard.
Omama will do everything.

Everything, just like it was with us.

If only Pop could see this.

Omama will do everything?

Omama will do... Christmas?

Be glad that Omama is helping you.

Omama does a lot of the work for you.
Since you don't have a cook.

Yes. Well... I'm going to take a bath.
And then I'll go for a walk...

with Sissi in the forest,
in the good clean air.

Sissi!

We don't eat by hand! Not yet!!

You're hysterical.

- Call me as soon as...
- You're not going to watch TV!

We'll get the tree.

Why, we were in the woods yesterday...

I mean, Santa Claus has already...

Omama, there is no Santa Claus.

And I don't like goose.

Sissy, go play.

She is still a child.

And a badly behaved one at that.

Insolent and ungrateful.

At home, she would have
felt the belt already!

Those times are past, thank God.

And by the way,
I don't like goose either.

Which tree do we take?

Don't care, I'm against it.

- Against what?
- Christmas trees.

- Got a better idea?
- Call off Christmas.

What?

Christmas is just consumer terror.

Fine. You explain that to Omama.

Let's do it.

It's about time.

You're giving him a hard time.

Me?! I have to invite his mother.
All right, that's proper.

Then I must get a gift for her.
I have to entertain her.

He goes into the forest and joins forces
with her. I am giving him a hard time?!

- If you ask me: you're exaggerating.
- I'm not asking you!

Listen: ever since I got here,
you've been mad.

At Omama, at Mommy and at Joe.
Nobody's doing you any harm.

You need more humor.

You dare?! Look at who's
throwing it all away!

- That has nothing to do with it.
- It does! Or you wouldn't have come.

I give up. Go ahead, spoil your mood!
But don't take it out on the others.

It's Christmas!

- Luiserl, think of the children.
- I'm fed up!

Do what you want. I'm going to bed!

I don't want to be disturbed anymore!

I'm going to Sissi.
The poor child, with this mood.

No, Punch, we don't eat by hand.
Not yet! You are hysterical.

Naughty Punch don't get goose!

I don't want goose! It makes me puke!

Hello, I'm Santa Claus!

There's no such thing.

- Are you excited yet?
- For what?

For Christmas!

I don't know. Everyone's so agitated.

It's the excitement.

Excitement? Mommy's yelling,
Omama makes a fuss, daddy's mad.

You only think that.

Now show me the presents.

One for mommy, one for daddy
and one for Omama.

What about Gregor and Lilibeth?

Gregor thinks gifts are stupid.
He calls them "consumer error."

"Terror." Gregor knows nothing.

It won't start. Why not?

- Did you leave the light on?
- Oh, baloney!

Joe! Joe, come here please!

Joe!

- Do you know where marjoram is?
- m*rder*r!

What's wrong with him?

Sissi?

- Maybe you know where marjoram is?
- Not a clue.

Can't you get rid of it?
The poor thing.

Stop that sniveling, all of you!

You should be glad I'm cooking.

Only, I need marjoram first.

Try again!

Nothing!

- You left the light on.
- Nonsense, I'm not a beginner!

Besides, a battery should
deal with a little bit of light.

Ooh, he's so cute.

What are you yelling about?
Why aren't you coming? I'm waiting.

That's not for you.

Oh, God!

Naughty girl! Do you need a slap?
Just wait until Lilibeth hears of this!

Lilibeth! Lilibeth!

Sissy child, what happened?

- Lilibeth, the rat is gone.
- What?

Kathi opened the door,
and he's gone.

Why was Kathi in my room?
She's impossible!

Get in and start it!

- Can't you do that alone?
- Fritz is gone!

Come, let's look for him.

Luiserl?

Luiserl, come on,
I need something.

I feel sick.

And why? Because you didn't eat
anything in the morning. No wonder!

Tell me where I can find something
and I'll make you some herbal tea.

I can't find anything here,
not even marjoram.

- There's no marjoram.
- But I need it for the goose.

- There is no goose!
- I'm getting tired of this.

You act as if I was going to poison you.

Hansl told me to cook.

And Hansi is my son,
and this is his house. So?

Then let him show you
where everything is!

- Fritzi!
- Who is Fritzi?

A rat. A big, fat rat.

- A rat?
- Yes.

You are all crazy, you and your family.
My poor Hansi!

Fritz! Fritzi!

Fritzily, where are you?

The tomcat probably ate him.

Poor child, such a shock. Come,
dearie, let us go to the pastry shop.

I will never forgive you!

Me?! Why me? Sissy did...

What a pigsty this place is, truly!

You don't notice anything, do you?

There is no Christmas spirit here.

You're right about that.
It's nothing like it should be.

But wait! Just wait.

It will all work out.

Kathi is ruthless!

Ruthless!

Well?

Like I said: just
because of a little light?

Where are you going?

To the pastry shop.

There's no Christmas spirit here,
not with that ridiculous tree!

We always had a double tree!

Mama!

- It's all crooked.
- Mama, don't criticize.

All I'm saying is that it's crooked.

It's awful! Why would this one be better?

It fits!

If you ever finish, you can decorate it.

Did you say "ever finish"?
That takes the cake.

Listen carefully:

I do Luiserl a favor
and cook for her.

Not that I like to cook that much.
I spent all my life in the kitchen!

And now you come along...
You think I'm doing this for fun?

I can't find anything in this mess.

Do you know where I can find marjoram?

No. Then how will I ever finish?

Not like this!

Then take care of this mess yourself!

Mama, I didn't mean it.

What did you mean?
No. I don't need that.

You go without anything all your life,
so the boy will grow up to be something.

And then... then you
are not even tolerated.

- Will you decorate the stupid tree?
- Fine, fine, fine! I'll do it.

But only because you ask me to.

Don't be so stubborn! He meant no harm.

- I don't want to bother you.
- You can stay.

- She agrees: you can cook.
- How kind. Thank you.

In return, she'll decorate the tree.

Your mother does not
decorate my tree.

Listen, Luise.

If you make a fuss, I'll spend
the damn day at the office!

I have enough work to do!

It's up to you.

Fine, have it your way.

You're the man of the house,
says your mother.

Don't tease me!

Are you going to get the carp?

No, let Gregor do it.
I've had enough for today.

Gregor!

Gregor!

- Go fetch the carp.
- In your dreams.

You'll do that, or your TV
will be gone in no time!

Did you hear?!

Hut, hut!

I'm full!

Oh Miss, we would like two
tiny little glasses of eggnog.

What?

You can choose one.

Take one out yourself!

We have nice carp today.

Not muddy at all.

You could have frozen the goose
instead of throwing it away...

If he doesn't come soon
I won't finish in time.

Kathi, you're taller.
Can you help me?

- What's that?
- That is angel hair.

I know you don't have any, but it
belongs to a real Christmas tree.

Hansl always had it like that.

Wait, your stitch is slipping.

Look! Is that Gregor driving?

No, Gregor does not drive.

Gregor watches. Watches!
He watches TV.

I see. Miss, two more
teenie-tiny eggnogs please!

Once more. Say that again!

- Even carp have a right to live.
- Ah!

Well. Then it's time that
I had a serious discussion.

Even a carp has the right to live?
Cheers! What are you doing?

- I'm dreaming.
- I see that!

- Dreaming won't fill our stomachs.
- Look, How about that?

- Mauritius. Where Kathi wanted to go.
- Nice.

Very nice.

- She's an idiot, our Kathi.
- Yes, you can say that.

To give up something
like that - for this!

Joe, you know what?

Let's skedaddle.

- What?
- Yes!

Let's just disappear!

We'll go and drive to the nearest
hotel, just you and me.

Yeah. We'll get a nice room...

with a big bed, and then...

- You're not all there.
- Yes, I am. I'm all there.

The two of us, we just leave.

That would be nice.

I've wished for that for years:

Go somewhere warm.

No snow, no tree.

Just you and me.
Peace and quiet.

- Alright, and the kids.
- You're telling me this now?

- I thought you cared about this hoopla.
- Me? Don't make me laugh.

I get an ulcer in September
just to think about it!

I am only doing this for all of you!

To bring you joy! I don't need this.

Another thorough misunderstanding.

Too bad... it's too late.

No. No, Joe!

Joe, we'll tell the others
that we want to be alone.

With the kids.

And everyone will understand?
Kathi? Lilibeth? Omama?

- No, they won't.
- Hey!

So I'll get the goose
out of the trash.

Omama, are these your
Christmas decorations?

Yes, it's all from the past.

We didn't get rid of anything.

I can see that.

Don't you want to... I mean, Luiserl
has ornaments too. Different ones.

No, this is my tree. With my ornaments.

She's making dinner.

A celebration of joy...

...and of peace.

Away! It's a surprise!

Away! It's a surprise!

5,000 tons of crude oil leaked
from a Greek tanker.

- May I?
- Sure.

... threatening the beautiful beaches
of Sicily. A disaster like Exxon Valdez...

My God! If Pop could only
see this, what would he say!

- "It was very nice, we were amused."
- What?

Nothing! Forget it.

- I'll get the presents now, ok?
- Yes.

It's not much, you know that.

With my small pension.

But I'm sure that Lilibeth
has brought enough.

I do wonder how she does it.

The expensive car,
the fashionable clothes...

- Mommy knows how to handle money.
- Don't be ridiculous.

She inherited. That's easy.

But we...

We earned our money the hard way.

The very hard way.

When I think of all the
things I didn't have...

Omama...

... you are doing good now, aren't you?

So don't complain!
Be glad you have a family!

But I have never
complained! Never!

I would have had
every reason to, but...

I have always swallowed
everything. Everything!

Karli, my husband, he always said to me:

Mitzerl...

Mitzerl, how do you do it?

To save so much...

with so little money.

We were even the first to have
a color TV! Yes, my dear!

- Others watched in black and white!
- Right.

Here is the bell. You will ring it.

- Can't.
- Why "can't"?

- I won't ring the bell.
- Then who? The Christ-child?

I won't do all the work and
I not even get to see her face!

- Whose face?
- Sissi's!

When the bell rings!

Her shining eyes! I won't let
you take that away from me.

- All right, I'll ring the bell.
- Good, but...

Do it on time, as it should be!

I want to go to bed. I feel sick.

- Christ-child is coming! Are you excited?
- No!

Why? The anticipation
is the best part of it!

- Lilibeth, a rat!
- What?

- Where?
- Gone. Gone again!

Fritzi! Fritzi!
There he is, there he is!

Sissi, look! I got him!
There he is, Fritzi!

Come, Fritzi, come! So...

- What are you doing? Are you crazy?
- I'm cooking!

Luise, you can't.

The goose was in the garbage!

- And?
- In the trash!

If the goose was in the trash,
it will not give you a rash...

... as you will soon forget its fate,
and where it was once you have ate!

- We have organic waste, anyway.
- Kathi, where are you?

You're not all there.

Yes, that's what the Joe said.

Joe.

Joe...

Joe, where are you?

The men fish the tuna out of the water
with hooks. In their net, they catch...

That's gross.

- See! That's why, well...
- I get it.

In their death throes,
the water seems to boil.

I'd rather have the carp
than goose from the trash.

The tuna is endangered....

5 o'clock, right on time.
Omama was always punctual.

And so was the Christ-child. Always!

Let's go.

Lilibeth, it's here. It's ringing!

- What? I haven't changed yet.
- You come at the last minute.

I have to change!

And you too!

You can't go in jeans,
uncombed, like a bum!

- Oh, Gregor stays as he is.
- That is tacky! So tacky!

You didn't get that from me!

Luiserl, please take him.
Luise! What's wrong?

♪ From Heaven on high, to Earth I come ♪
Get a grip! Think of the children!

- Come on!
- That's terrible!

- Lilibeth, I feel sick!
- No funny business!

The Christ-child is coming!

The Christ-child! The Christ-child!

Do you have a camera?

Mama, spare us!
Look, Sissilein.

Sissi, really!
It's not that ugly.

- It doesn't matter!
- You're drunk.

- Just a little bit...
- At least take care of your child!

Merry Christmas!

♪ Oh come little children ♪

You are all crazy.

♪ Come all to the manger... ♪
And now the presents!

Where is the... Ah, here.
Sissi, this is for you!

Unwrap it very carefully!

First Omama. She decorated the tree,
I mean with the Christ-child.

Sissi, where is your present for Omama?

I want to go to bed.

Omama, this is from Sissi.
She made it herself.

I'm curious.

That's cute. What is it?

A ladybug! It brings luck.

Now it's the others' turn.

- Ooh, for my dollhouse!
- Don't you dare!

This is Old Vienna from 1800.
The Sorgenthal period.

Sissi, this cup goes in your
display case. For your dowry.

Mama, why are you crying?

Such a beautiful thing!

It must have cost a fortune!

You spend so much money on me?!

You are a good boy, Hansi. A good boy.

If... if Pop could only see this!

Put it on me, please!

No!

Go away! Away!

A blanket! Get a blanket!

- It's Christmastide, the tree is fried!
- Sissi! Sissi, get away!

My mink! My mink! Stop! My mink!

Ah, my mink!

My mink! My mink!

Lilibeth, Lilibeth!

- Let go! Let go!
- Take the beast from me!

You dumb goose,
can't you be careful?

Give it to me!
Give it to me! Let go!

I wonder if it can be fixed.

I hope you have a good
insurance policy!

- What's so funny?
- Nothing's funny!

It's a disgrace, a disgrace!

I'll never celebrate Christmas
with you ever again!

So everything's fine!

- Mom, she didn't mean it.
- Yes I did! It's exactly what I meant.

- Apologize to Mama!
- Don't you yell at my daughter!

You should focus on
getting rid of that crap!

Say something, Hansl, say something!

I won't put up with this!

Joe, it's your choice:
your mother or me!

- The flight to Mauritius, please!
- Too late, sorry.

- You must hold the plane.
- I'm sorry, it's really too late.

Please!

Hello, the Air Mauritius.

Oh, dear. The plane has departed.

Your ticket!

Merry Christmas!

Jonas!

- But why...
- I would never fly without you.

Not even to Mauritius!... Yes, hello!

OK, we are coming.

Now we'll go to my parents
and celebrate with the family!