Robot Chicken: Self-Discovery Special (2025)

[bunniefuu]

We all paid 80 bucks

for the blue hats, right?

- Yeah.

- Yup.

- Debit card got rejected.

- We can't be

The Cerulean Chapeaus

until you buy the damn hat,

- Camden!

- Look at me.

- I'm an elephant.

- Mom!

Did Dr. Chen renew

the prescription

for your rectal shingles,

or not?

- [Laughs]

- Like a roof in your butt?

Eugh!



My mom won't give me

one nanosecond of peace!

I was going to the Walgreens.

I'm not making two trips

to the Walgreens.

It's such an honor

to meet the A-list actor

who took the C-list

comic character

to a B-list movie character.

Oh, so this is Mr. Strange!

Mom! What the f*ck

are you doing?!

Oh! It's so nice to meet you,

Mr. Strange.

Enchant. [Smooches]

Boop, boo, boo!

[Chuckles] Charmed.

50 bucks, kid.

So, what's on the agenda today?

Mother-son boudoir photography?

Wha-ack-what-what?!

I would rather pull off

all my skin,

roll it up like a Fruit Roll-Up,

and then eat it.

Would you do that on camera?

And three, two...

Drop the robes!

- Ta-da!

- [Gagging]

These will make

such a lovely Christmas card!

Oh, my stars and garters.

What is happening?!

The Benedick has arrived.

Oh. That's nice.

[Camera shutter clicking]

- Ooh!

- What is that?

It does look a little strange.

No sh*t, Sherlock.

But seriously, kid,

get that checked out.

I'm Zak Bagans,

and this is "Ghost Adventures".

Tonight, we explore

this abandoned

seasonal inflatable

lawn decoration factory.

Is it a paranormal hotbed

or just a lot of hot air?

- Whoa, dude!

- [Whispers] We'll cut Aaron's line in post.

[Ominous music plays]

Broooo.

The Zak-ometer's going crazy.

Da-da-da-daaa!

Welcome to Ghost Bitchventures

starring yours truly,

b*tch Pudding. Blam!

- I'm Zak Bagans.

- Wow!

It's the bass player

in every ska band.

- No, this is my Zak-ometer.

- No sh*t?

We're sh**ting a TV show

for Travel Channel.

I'm making my own show

for Travel Channel.

Guess we'll see who makes

a better show then, Bloggins!

Guess we will!

Da-da-da-daaa!

Just between us

paranormal professionals--

did a ghost ever finger

your funhole?

Naw, naw, no. That's absurd.

Ghosts are voices

from the other side,

desperate to communicate

with the living.

New question. Slenderman

wants to finger your funhole--

he'll give you $500,

but it's in ghost dollars.

What do you do?

Nobody's fingering

any funholes.

[Laughs]

[Deep, raspy voice] Aaron!

Bro, tell me you got that

on tape.

I am the ghost of the seasonal

inflatable lawn decoration

factory k*ller.

Proof! 34 seasons

and we finally have proof!

- Aaron!

- Yes, sir?

Would you let Slenderman

finger your funhole

for 500 ghost dollars?

Is... he paying me

or am I paying him?

[Laughs evilly]

You stupid idiot!

Da-da-da-daaa!

[Deep, raspy voice]

Zak! It is I.

Jackpot! This is the real deal!

Tell us, why did you do

those terrible things here

in the seasonal inflatable

lawn decoration factory?

I will tell you...

if you let my BFF

Slenderman finger your funhole.

Jesus Christ, b*tch Pudding!

Do you know how much

this camera crew costs?

- [Roars]

- [Screams]

Da-da-da-daaa!

Are you the ghost or did a

dinosaur sh*t out Prince Philip?

Not topical anymore? Okay.

Oh, noooooo!

[In slow motion]

My camera!

[Screaming in slow motion]

[In slow motion]

Ghost Bitchventures!

[Rock and roll music plays]

Aah!

[Screams]

[Laughing evilly]

Oh, wow!

Oh, sh*t!

Blam!

Whoo!

[Normal voice]

Consider this myth... busted.

[Normal voice] Wrong show.

The state of our oceans

is in crisis.

Human-caused pollution

and global warming

has made the world's oceans

unlivable for many species.

Forced migration was inevitable.

Invasive species are never

welcomed by native wildlife.

[Clears throat] You know

how fast you were going?

Had anything to drink tonight?

[Engine revs, tires screech]

He's running! He's running!

Is this the future anyone wants?

This is Shark Week.

Let's keep our oceans beautiful

and keep sea life

where it belongs --

in the sea.

Ugh. [Groaning]

Wh-- Wh-- Where am I,

and why am I... naked?!

Greetings, Bat-fool!

Let's see how you like being

Naked and Afraid!

Naked? Yes, undeniable --

there's my Bat-d*ck.

Afraid? Never.

No, that's the name of the show.

You must survive

"Naked and Afraid",

or I'll blow up

the Naked and Afraid Experience

at Warner Bros Movie World!

No!

It's Australia's hidden gem!

Then I suppose

you'll be playing my game!

What, like this is supposed

to be hard? I'm Batman.

In the morning I'll build

a boat, sail to Gotham City,

and punch Riddler

right in the ba*ls.

Meow, room on that boat

for one more? Meow.

- [Gasps] Catwoman!

- [Gasps]

Meow. Looks like we've got

an Adam and Eve situation

happening here, Batman.

Meow!

Yeah, only if Eve belonged

in Arkham Asylum

and Adam could bench press

550 pounds --

- 560, whatever.

- Oh, f*cking meow!

We're trapped on a

deserted island with no clothes,

and you still won't look at me

from the neck down. Meow!

Oh, no, just --

I'm just thinking about

my mother's b*llet-riddled

corpse.

- Meow.

- Ugh, I'm an open book.

We should hit civilization

with about 3 to 4 weeks

of strong paddling, Robin.

Guess this is our view

for the next month, huh?

Meow, Batman!

Volleyball Robin!

Riddler was watching us from

his tree fort the whole time.

Want to help me tie him

to a fire ant hill?

I can whip him with a palm.

[Sarcastically] No, don't!

You can come inside my batcave.

We're going home!

You can make your own boat,

Selina!

Meow, oh, you'll be back!

After all, palm tree sap

dissolves in saltwater, stupid.

- [Wood creaks, breaks]

- Oh! What the f*ck!

Mayday! Gentlemen,

it has been an honor!

Robin? Wait, no, Robin!

Where are you go--?

Robin!

As longtime viewers know,

I'm very unlucky in love.

But I've met someone

very special online.

So today, I'm traveling

to her hometown to propose.

[Seagull cries]

[People screaming]

- It's a beast!

- Giant coming!

Hey! Stop that!

Ow! Ow! Oops!

Whoa!

[Thuds]

[Groans]

Big Ed!

Wow. You really are big.

Mary, you look normal size

in our nude Facetimes.

I knew I should have

asked for a banana for scale.

I am the King of Lilliput!

Any man who wants to marry my

daughter must prove his worth.

[Seagull cries]

Ah, f*ck!

The pooping dragon!

Run for cover!

[People screaming]

He probably smells

all the mayo I put in my hair.

Get outta here!

Big Ed, you have saved

our kingdom

from the hot white liquid death.

You may have my daughter's hand.

This is the best news!

[Excitedly] Da, da, da, da.

Whoa!

Mary? You good?

Hi there, Mr. Nerd.

I'm Dr. Toesenhoofer.

What brings you here?

You're the cheapest doctor

on my mom's insurance plan --

[Whispers] thanks, Obama --

[Normal voice] but I figured

feet are just muscle,

bones, and skin.

How's that any different

from the rest of my body?

You probably just focus on feet

to feel special, right?

I've got one who can see.

Wait!

I really do need your help.

Gross! [Gagging]

So-- Sorry.

That was unprofessional.

[Clears throat] Ooh.

Let's cut open this foot --

er, thing --

and -- and take a look inside.

Shouldn't we do

some tests first?

All my tests are for feet.

Okay, just a small incision.

Oh, my God!

What the heck is that?

It's a teratoma,

a benign tumor --

sometimes containing the cells

of a twin.

Ooh.

This one has excellent feet.

So I have a brother?

Wazzup!

Wow, he's so cool.

He'll need a cool name.

How about James Dean or Keanu?

Wolverine? [Gasps]

Jamesdean Keanu-Wolverine!

Oh. That's cute.

Anyway, this disgusting growth

should die off naturally

in about 90 days.

What? No! We just met.

I have so much to show him

about the world.

Settlers of Catan.

The McRib.

- Sex tourism.

- Oh, man.

You'll never fall in love

and get married.

It was always a dream to be an

usher at my brother's wedding.

A wedding in 90 days?

I might know some people. Wink.

[Romanian accent]

My name Jordashe,

22-year-old Romanian villager.

Dream to find love

with American husband

and live new life in U.S.A.

with the ham-borg-er

and the riding lawnmower.

I have been e-mailing

with cute boy named James Dean.

Jordashe! It's us!

You not James Dean.

Meet your new love of your life!

Buenos dias, baby.

You did not tell me

you were attached

to ugly human nerd.

Not cool, bro.

True, I didn't, but daddy

brought you a Squishmallow.

Okay.

You have a lovely home,

Mrs. Chow-cheff-skew.

Thanks your, Green Card.

It's a house where I born.

It's house where I die.

[Slurping]

So is this, like, your erection

or mine?

I gotta confess something,

sweet t*ts.

I'm gonna die in 90 days.

This Romania.

I hope I die in 90 days.

- Okay.

- [Both moaning]

Wow. I love the village life.

Ooh, and look at those Slavic

hotties giving us the eyeball.

[Sultry Romanian accent]

Oooh, hello, Greenie!

Well, too bad you're spoken for.

You wanna be my wingman?

Buckethead! "Romanian Bar" --

That sound like accent.

I'm so excited for this wedding.

Should we have invited

our parents?

That seems like an oversight.

[Slurping]

Are we still at the bar?

I feel a lot of tongues.

Are we at a petting zoo?

Shut up!

Just keep that bucket on.

Do you, Meal ticket,

take this woman

to be your legally wedded

USA wife?

- I do, babe.

- And do you,

Jordache Alucard

Chow-cheff-skew,

take this man --

-Oooh, hello, baby.

Hey, it's the three ladies

who took us to the petting zoo

- last night!

- Petting zoo?

I am familiar

with American euphemisms.

Cheating dog! Stab stab!

[Screams]

Jamesdean Keanu-Wolverine! No!

[Coughing]

Better to burn out

than fade away.

Keep on ro--

That... That was so cool.

Say, don't people usually poop

their pants when they die?

[Spluttering, farting]

Oh, there it is.

This week on

"This Came Out of Me".

This came out of me.

That's a baby, ma'am.

- [Baby whimpers]

- Should I put it back in?

Hey, everybody.

Guy Fieri --

not Fury,

not Fi-ally, not Gus Ferrari.

We're rolling out

to find the greatest diners,

drive-ins, and dives.

Today, we're checking out

Gargamel's Hate House

off exit 13

of the New Jersey Turnpike.

Okay, first impressions?

Absolutely zero customers.

I'm met the owner to get

the lowdown on the showdown.

There's no foot traffic

in the middle of a forest.

Plus, everyone in the village

says I'm an evil wizard. Blegh.

- [Meows]

- Oh, right.

The unpaid parking tickets.

I kind of turned the mayor

into a frog about it.

Um, does that cat

understand English?

- Barely.

- But things change quite a bit

when I tried

the house specialty,

Chef Gargamel's famous

Smurf Pie.

The crust is super flaky.

The vanilla, the pine nuts.

And wow, there's, like,

this little savory pork

that melts in your mouth

right at the end.

- What is that?

- [Shouts]

- That's the Smurf.

- What is a Smurf?

Oh, it's just local

woodland creature

indigenous to these parts,

which I sometimes hunt

for food and sport.

Help us, help us, help us!

Alright, Chef,

you gotta walk me through it.

Is it line caught or net caught?

What is the yield?

Is it boiled or baked?

Is it brined or marinated?

- The flavor is rocking the house.

- Thank you, Guy Fieri.

[Sniffs] You truly live up

to the legends.

Say, Guy, would you like to --

Would you care to go

on a grocery run with me?

Yes.

Run!

[Tires screeching]

[Smurfs screaming]

- Oh, yeah!

- Whoo-hoo!

Hark! I am Crab Woman!

I am in trouble.

You see, I accidentally

opened my briefcase

full of crabs,

which are my babies,

and they all scurried away.

I fear they've been caught

and eaten.

I am Crab Woman!

We'll help you

get all of your crabs.

[Stammers]

For you, of course.

Oh, thank you!

Now let's sail around

aimlessly searching for them.

Search aimlessly?

No way. I'm out.

- [Water splashes]

- Sorry.

Jake's just being "crabby".

I like that about him.

[Laughs]

Whoopsie!

- Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no!

- Oh! The crabs got all over you.

I will crab-solutely

brush them off.

Clamp! I know it was you

who's been k*lling

my crab babies.

Now you're going to pay!

Ah! Crab BJ!

- Surprise!

- [Cackles]

I guess you could say

I was your deadliest catch.

[Laughs]

And so the legend

of Crab Woman is born.

I am Crab Woman!

What do you want me to do?

Say your name

and what your addiction is.

- [Shouts] What?

- [Loudly] Say your name

and what your addiction is.

[Loudly] Okay.

My name is Larry,

and I'm addicted to... foghorns!

[Foghorn blares]

Foghorns!

[Blaring continues]

Fo--

Heads up, g*ng.

That greedy hotel owner

says the ghost looks like

a guy in a gorilla suit

- with a frying pan on his head.

- [Both grunt]

Jinkies!

The Ghost Adventures crew.

Does that, like, mean there's,

like, a real ghost?

- [Teeth chattering]

- Don't worry, buddy,

you just need to let them know

that we come in peace.

[Shouts] Oh spirits,

be not afraid!

I'm sure it can all be

explained with science.

Oh, it's a ghost.

And we'll prove it.

Nerds!

[Zak-ometer beeping]

Oh, check out th-- Nah-uh.

[Grunting]

[Beeping continues]

- [Alarm blaring]

- Uh-oh! Everybody out!

Well, g*ng, we cracked it.

A carbon monoxide leak

was making people believe

- this old place was haunted.

- If it was a gas leak,

why is the Zak-ometer

going crazy?

Like, maybe it's smelling

your Taco Bell farts

like the rest of us.

I think something dark

is inside that place,

and I won't leave

until I find out what it is.

Come on, Scoob, like,

what's the holdup?

I'll tell you what

the holdup is.

Scoob is a Ghost Adventurer now!

Reah! RI'm ra

Rost Radventurer row.

- Huh?

- No, Scooby.

That son of a b*tch.

Like, man, that place is

still full of carbon monoxide.

[Romantic instrumental music

plays]





- Oui.

- Oui.

[People shouting]

Oh, no!

[Music continues]

Help us!

- Oui.

- Oui.

Baguette.

[Groans]



[People shouting]

[Botched French]

Ceci est de l'art.

Oui.

[Smooches]



- Oui.

- [Water splashes]

- Oui.

- [Water splashes]

I sense you're trying

to contact a departed loved one.

- Yes.

- I'm getting the letter T.

Wow, you are good.

He was a tumor. See?

Oh, my gawd,

you brought the body with you.

I've never done of reading

this fresh before.

[Gasps] Oh, I'm getting...

I'm... uh...

I'm, ugh, getting the... ugh...

Oh. He's getting worked up

about something, honey.

I gotta break contact,

otherwise he might --

[Stammering]

Uh, Mrs. Medium?

[Jamesdean's voice]

Wazzup!

- Jamesdean? Is that you?

- You jabroni!

You got me stabbed

at my own wedding!

I'm gonna k*ll you!

Ahhh!

Hi, I'm Zak Bagans.

Rand RI'm Rooby Raggins.

Ruh-ro! Ret's ret routta rere!

[Screams]

Oh, that does it!

No more reality shows!

You'll never see me again!

My brother thinks he's safe,

but I'll sip his steaming blood

from his hollowed-out skull.

Next time on

Staten Island Medium.

Moonshiners,

I come from the Moon Kingdom.

You are destined

to protect this realm from evil.

- Now hurry. Put these on.

- Well, sh**t.

I ain't one

to question a talking raccoon.

Moonshine-rific!

Whoo! Does this tickle

your pickle, too?

Whoa!

Well, damn, we look great.

Whelp, time to save the world.

Yes!

Eat from my never-ending pies.

All your energy shall be mine!

[Laughs evilly]

We come to thwart your

evil doing, scary sexy lady!

Why can't I steal your energy?

It's like there's a force

protecting it.

Moonshine's a depressant.

Our senses have been dulled

for years.

[Both] In the name of the

moonshine, we'll punish you!

I don't have a catchphrase!

- [All slurping]

- Curse you, Sailor Moonshiners!

- Up top!

- Slap this thing!

Oh, no, I think I ripped

my space overalls.

Hey, kid, what'll it be?

Give me a strawberry moonshine.

Large.

Welcome to Alaska, stranger.

What reality show are you on?

Reality show?

Everyone in this town,

heck, most everyone in Alaska

has a docu-series

on the Discovery Channel.

We got Shawn Pomeranke

from "Bering Sea Gold",

Todd Hoffman

from "Hoffman Family Gold",

Marty Raney

from "Homestead Rescue" --

not sure if there's gold

in that one --

Jonathan Hillstrand

from "Deadliest Catch",

- "The Alaska k*ller Bigfoot",

I could go on... - Hey, now!

I'm just here

to get off the grid,

build my own shelter, hunt my

own food, and face the elements.

- Oh, they're gonna love you.

- Excuse me, sir.

Are you 600 pounds or more?

Do you build your own shelter

in a remote area?

No, no, no, thank you.

No! No! No! No more reality TV!

Oh, thank God,

I think I lost them.

Hah, you know,

the great thing about Alaska

is making a snowman.

[Screams]

Welcome back

to Staten Island Medium.

In this episode,

I predict your death.

You forgot one thing, Evil Twin.

The power of callbacks!

Are you ready

for your Benediction?

[Jamesdean and Medium] Whoa! Be still

my wiener. Whoa! Be still my vag*na.

[Both] Is that naked

Benedict Cumberbatch?

Let's get cumbersome.

- Fire it up!

- Hello!

- Yee-haw!

- If anyone asks, I'm 5'5".

Well done, my brother.

But you forgot something

as well.

- Oh, yeah? What?

- It's Shark Week!

[Laughs evilly]

- Oh, my God!

- [Shark roaring]

I hate sharks! I mean,

not as much as I hate eggs,

but I hate -- Ow!

Good job, Tickle.

- Outsmarted by a god dang shark!

- [Screaming]

Oh, everybody died.

Wow, thanks, guys.

See you in hell, baby.

[Laughs evilly]

Noooo! I don't wanna die!

[Gasping, panting] Huh?

I'm back at the foot doctor?

I've never seen anyone faint

from the topical anesthetic

before.

Oh, I just had

the weirdest dream.

You were there, and...

Well, anyway, it was

a real quest of self-discovery.

[Cheers and applause]

Hey, where's my brother?

Brother? [Laughs]

You have what we call

an ingrown hair.

And pull!

Oh, my God. Ohhhhhh!

- [Chuckles]

- Oh, my God.

- Oooh! It's long one.

- Oh, my God, stop it!

- Oooh!

- What is happening?!

Keeps on coming.

- Ah, oh, my God.

- Ooh, ooh, ooh, ahh.

Annnnd... pop!

Ah, that... that was so gross.

You wanna see

something really gross?

- Uh, no.

- Ah!

[Screams]

- [Monkey grunting]

- Stoopid Monkey.

[Screaming]