06x22 - Snow Escape/Snow News Day

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪

♪ Dodging girls like Ping-Pong ba*ls ♪

♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪

♪ Leaping over laundry piles ♪

♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪

♪ Guy's got to do what he can to survive ♪

- ♪ In the Loud house, in the Loud house ♪

- ♪ Duck, dodge, push, and shove ♪

♪ That's how we show our love ♪

- ♪ In the Loud house, in the Loud house ♪

- ♪ One boy and ten girls ♪

- ♪ Wouldn't trade it for the world ♪

- ♪ Loud, Loud, Loud ♪

♪ Loud house ♪

- Poo-poo.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- [whistling]

all: Ooh!

- Wow! Snow on the most exciting morning of the year!

Today's the last day of school before the winter break,

and each of our classes

is throwing a holiday party to celebrate.

We're talking carols, gift exchanges,

and then there's the food.

♪ ♪

Gingerbread houses,

peppermint cookies,

and the best part--

Clyde's surprise Christmas bake!

Ah...

[muffled chewing sounds]

- Hey, hey, quit gummin' on my hat!

[spitting] Puh...puhh.

Even Lucy's in the festive spirit.

She found the perfect gift for Haiku.

[heartbeat thumping]

Ughhh! This is the one school day

You definitely don't wanna miss.

- She's a star on the stage,

a star in your hearts,

and this year, she's...

the star on the second grade Christmas tree!

[grumbles]

- Oh! - Ah!

- Aah! My eyes!

[news theme plays]

- Patchy Drizzle on the scene,

fighting the elements alone!

Last night's surprise snowstorm,

combined with today's milder temperatures,

make today's white stuff perfect for packing snowballs.

So, this meteorologist is officially declaring today...

a Packing Day!

[all gasp, shriek] - No, no, no!

Did he just say... - Oh, he did.

[gulp]

Packing Day.

all: Aah! - Oh, no!

Her coat is gone!

- Whenever Patchy declares it a Packing Day,

Lynn goes full beast mode.

She lurks outside waiting to hunt us down

and pummel us with snowballs!

No one is safe.

She's the reason the house slants.

[thud]

[crash]

- Bad news! She wiped the fridge clean,

and she took our sack lunches too!

- That means she'll have enough fuel for hours!

- [loud belch] [kids whimper]

- She's out there.

- Seven, eight, nine--wait!

Somebody's missing! - Oh, no, it's Pops!

all: Dad! [overlapping yelling]

- [whistling]

Huh?

Oh, yeah, oh, yeah.

It's an exciting day! I know! Ha.

- [loud belch] - Uhh--who's there?

Hey!

Wait a minute--snowstorm, milder temperatures.

[gasps]

Packing Day!

[gasping] Aah! Aah!

I'm not gonna make it! Ooh--oh--aah!

[all gasp]

Al...most...there...

Whew!

- Oh! - She got Father!

Any one of us could be next.

[all screaming]

- Kids, kids, settle down.

Everything is going to be okay.

If you can get these keys to your father,

he can drive you to school.

- Oh!

No, no, no--no!

[sobbing]

- Well...ha ha ha... there's still the bus.

- Uh-uh. It won't go down our street on Packing Day

after what Lynn did last year.

- Ernie the bus driver still hasn't fully thawed out.

- I hate to say it,

but if we're gonna get to our parties,

we're just gonna have to... [gulp] walk.

- Dude! We'll never survive.

Dad couldn't even make it from the front yard

to the house!

- Hmm...yeah, but Dad didn't have a plan.

Mom, I'm gonna need all the pots and pans in the kitchen.

Lana, grab your spare trash cans.

Let's move out!

[exciting music]

♪ ♪

All right, everyone, we need to stick together.

Safety in numbers.

For the holiday parties!

all: For the holiday parties!

- Yeah! - Aah!

- Good luck, my brave children.

I'm rooting for ya!

[exhales] They're goners.

[suspenseful music]

- It's quiet...

too quiet.

Keep your eyes peeled.

- [hoarse, heavy breathing]

[loud belch]

- She's here...

[whooshing sound]

- Incoming!

- Every bipedal humanoid for themselves!

[all screaming]

- Hey, wait for me!

[all panting]

- Aah!

- [gasps]

- Go on without us, dudes.

- But bring us back some of Clyde's surprise.

- [snarling]

- Uh-oh. She's refueling.

- What are we gonna do? - Don't panic.

If armor won't help us, we'll need to go for stealth.

- ♪ It's Christmas, so happy ♪

♪ So merry, let's rejoice ♪

♪ Presents and candy canes ♪ - That's it!

- ♪ May the children raise their voice ♪

- All clear. Let's go!

[all whimpering, panting]

We're nearly halfway to school!

- [loud belch] - Quick!

Get into position!

- [snarling, sniffing]

[sniffing]

Grrrr.

[all whimpering]

[Lynn growls, sniffs]

- ♪ So merry let's rejoice ♪

♪ Presents and candy canes ♪

- ♪ May the children ♪

♪ Raise their voi ♪

♪...oice ♪

What? I was just trying to sell it!

- Run!

Through there!

- [snarling]

[all grunting]

- [growling]

[all whimpering]

- Hey, we lost her.

[screeching brakes sound]

[all exhale] - Thank you.

- Uh, what's that?

♪ ♪

- Aah!

- We're trapped!

- Uh--aah!

- She always goes for the weakest one in the herd.

- I resent that!

- Come on, we've gotta get out of here!

Follow me!

[all exhale]

- Good idea, Lincoln. I'm gonna order some tots.

- Restaurant's not open yet, Leni.

We're just here to hide out from Lynn while we regroup.

- Oh, it's no use.

No matter where we go, she finds us.

- Hmm. Then maybe it's time to go on the offensive.

If we wanna make those parties, we have to take her out.

- Yeah. Let's turn the tables on the snow monster!

- If we can bring Lynn inside, we can trap her here.

[suspenseful version of "Jingle Bells"]

♪ ♪

- [grunting]

♪ ♪

- Huh!

All done. Nice work, everyone.

Now all that's left to do is leave out some bait

to draw Lynn's attention.

We'll need something...

eye-catching.

- Ugh. Lola Loud is nobody's bait!

- Ally-oop! [grunts]

- [snorts] - You can do it, Lola!

- You three owe me big time! [growls]

- [weakly] We love you.

- Pah! [click]

[bright music]

- Hmm?

Heh heh heh heh heh.

- It's not working!

[whoosh]

- [snarling, growling]

- Okay, okay, it's working. [crying] It's working!

I hate that it's working!

[pounding]

Waah--

- Huh? - Now!

- [gasps]

[both grunting]

Whoa-whoa-whoaaa!

Aah!

- We did it! - Yes!

[inhuman shrieking]

[all whimper] - Lynn,

we'll come get you after school, okay?

Just hang tight.

- Sheesh. It appears we live another day.

- Well, well, well.

- Lynn? But how?

- Picked the lock. Getting pretty good with these.

[belch]

Oh, and I helped myself to a little snack

while I was in there.

Ahh.

I'm all fueled up, buh-- [belch]

baby.

There's nothing you can... [belch]

do now.

- It was nice knowing you all.

Even you, Lincoln.

[loud belch]

- Huh? Hmm...

[stomach rumbles]

[gasps] Wait, Lynn,

why don't we stand there, and you stand here?

That way, the sun won't be in your eyes when you pummel us.

- Oh, Lincoln, has the snow frozen your cerebrum?

- Ha! Thanks, Stinkin'. Good idea.

Happy Packing Day, chumps.

[all whimpering]

- Come on...

[stomach growling]

[growling]

- [belch]

Uh-oh.

- Yeah! - Oh Lincoln, that was amazing!

- That's not gonna hold her for long,

and we've got parties to get to!

- [gasping, panting]

This isn't over.

Oof!

Well, maybe it is.

♪ ♪

[all chewing] - Mmm...

- Wow! Clyde really outdid himself

with these miniature gingerbread houses.

They've got a working chimney and plumbing.

- Thanks for sharing these, dudes.

Lola, how'd the show go?

- It went great! They asked me

to tone down the brightness next year,

but that's not happening!

A star's gotta shine, baby!

- Hey, fam!

No hard feelings about today, right?

I'm actually pretty impressed

by how you outsmarted me this time.

[news theme plays]

- This just in. Tomorrow calls for

another surprise flurry of frosty freeze.

Looks like another Packing Day!

- Ha ha. Chumps. You may have won today,

but tomorrow, you're gonna eat major snow.

See ya on the b*ttlefield!

Awoooo!

[grunting]

- Uh...should we remind her that tomorrow's

the start of holiday break

and we don't have to leave the house?

all: Nah!

[heavy, dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- Clyde, sweetie.

Any idea why your father's outside

in the middle of a snowstorm?

And wearing that hideous coat?

Harold? - Oh!

- Aah!

- Wait. If that's not you outside,

then who is it?

♪ ♪

[snoring sounds]

[siren blaring]

[buzz]

- The front door camera detected movement.

Go, go, go!

- Look!

[thudding footsteps]

- What is that?

- I don't know!

But it made off with our Christmas lights.

- Eh. We've been meaning to take those down anyway.

[engine struggles]

- Oh! The ding-dang thing won't start.

- No worries, Dad. I can use my shovel.

Whoa! Those are some weird footprints.

[motor revving] - Hey, it started!

- Uhh--ohh...

- So, what story do we lead with today?

"Featloaf," typo in the lunch menu,

or new trash cans in the teachers' lounge?

- Boy, slow news day.

- Listen up, people!

I've got a hot lead.

There's a creature loose in Royal Woods,

and it took all our Christmas lights last night!

- Wait! My dads and I saw a big, furry figure

run through the backyard last night.

- And I found this footprint in my driveway.

- [moans]

- Aah!

- Linc, let me see your photo.

[gasps] Guys!

I think there's an abominable snowman in Royal Woods!

[all gasp]

- [moans] Ah...

- Oh, man, this is great for us!

For centuries, people have been trying to

prove the existence of an abominable snowman.

If we can get evidence that shows it's real,

it could be our biggest scoop ever!

- It'll sure beat reportin' on typos and trash cans.

- Then this looks like a job for the Action News Team...

Winter Edition! [exciting music]

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

- Look--a trail!

We're getting close!

[loud roaring]

That must be it!

[all screaming]

- Oof!

- So...not it.

- Ugh. You know, forget about chasing this thing.

Let's lure it to us instead.

We just need some bait.

- How about the cinnamon buns I baked for us?

Everybody loves my cinnamon buns.

- [sniffing]

[screeching]

- Aah! - Aah!

- See? What did I tell you?

- Clyde! - Hang on, buddy!

- Aah!

[all grunting]

Whaa--

- Is this outfit really necessary?

- Abominable snowmen are of Alpine origin, Stella.

Yodeling is their love language,

and we need you to look as authentic as you sound.

- Ah-ah-ahem.

♪ Yodle-ay-yodle-ay yodle-ay-hee-hoo ♪

[echoing] Hoo...hoo...

[crows cawing]

[rumble]

Did you guys hear that?

- It worked. Come to Papa!

- Zach, that's not the snowman.

It's an avalanche!

[all whimpering, gasping]

- That was close.

Wait--where's Liam?

- [panting]

[rapid banjo music]

Whoa--gah--

Whoa-oa-oaaaa!

[banjo music continues]

♪ ♪

- Liam, are you okay?

- I'm okay, y'all. Just go on without me.

I'll have MeeMaw thaw me out.

- This is beat!

We've got no proof of the snowman, it's cold,

and my legs are tired from all this walking.

Ughh...

Guys, we're never gonna find this thing.

- [growling]

- Ohh... - Uhh...

- [snarling]

[roaring, snarling]

- Ohh...

- That was our chance! We blew it!

- Maybe not! Check this out.

- You got a pic? - Sweet, dude!

- Whoa!

- We gotta get this story

uploaded to the school website, ASAP!

Hey, you guys aren't gonna believe--

Uh...what's going on?

- Shh!

- The discovery of an abominable snowman

by Royal Woods' very own Action News Team

has sent shockwaves around the Midwest.

This is Katherine Mulligan saying,

don't get eaten out there.

- Aah!

- You guys are on every channel!

[click] Action News Team and Snowman.

[click] Action News Team and Snowman.

[click] Underwear causing butt rash?

- You're all over the internet too!

- Even my science blogs are abuzz.

Kudos, big bro and associates.

This may be the scoop of the century.

- Hey, everyone, look. It's the Action News Team!

Great job, guys!

- Uh, fellers and Stellers,

we got ourselves a big ol' problemo.

...and that photo y'all took

wasn't of an abominable snowman at all.

It was my long-lost sheep Roxanne.

- No way! Sheep aren't that big.

And they don't walk on two legs.

- Look, y'all, she ain't been shorn in a year,

and I taught her to walk on two legs

so we could skateboard together.

You see?

♪ ♪

I'd recognize those baby blues anywhere.

- Oh, no! He's right!

It is Roxanne!

We have to retract our story.

Let's just say we goofed.

We mistook our friend's long-lost unshorn sheep

for a mythical snow beast.

Easy!

- Do you hear yourself, bro?

We'll be a laughingstock, and not just in school,

but everywhere!

- Rusty's got a point. This is a national news story.

No one would ever believe our reporting again!

- Unless...

we catch Liam's sheep and bring him back to the farm

for a sheer-- then everyone will just think

the abominable snowman left Royal Woods.

What do you say?

- I say let's get my sheep back.

[twittering]

[screeching brakes sound]

- Hello. I'm...

all: Katherine Mulligan!

-...reporting live on the abominable snowman

that has struck fear into the hearts

of all Royal Woodsians.

Today, we hope to calm that fear

by broadcasting the beast's capture.

- I'm sorry. Did she say "capture"?

She's going to capture it? [laughter]

- No. [kids exclaim]

I am.

- Mr. B-B-Bolhofner? [groans] Ohh...

- The mayor started getting calls from concerned residents

after your news report.

So she tasked me with capturing this snow menace.

- Um, you sure you wanna do this, Mr. B?

It's pretty...[shivers] snowy out here.

- Ha!

I once froze my body in a block of Arctic ice

until I was rescued by a Japanese fishing rig!

- O...kay.

- This is bad--real bad.

If Mr. B finds Roxanne before we do,

everyone will find out we're liars!

- That's only if he finds Roxanne.

I say we split up.

Half of us go with Bolhofner to throw him off the scent,

half go look for Roxanne.

- Hey, Mr. B...

you think a few of us can tag along and help?

[clank] - Fine!

Just don't get in my way.

All right, wilderness --

tag as many trees as you can

so you don't end up walking in circles.

Let's move.

[mischievous music]

♪ ♪

Huh?

Coulda sworn we checked this area.

- Come in, Snow Squirrel. This is Winter Possum.

We have a visual of the target.

I repeat: we have a visual.

- Great. We'll shake Bolhofner and come meet you.

- I knew it! You've been trying to sabotage me!

Where's the beast?

- Sorry. We actually have no idea.

- Btdubs. We're at that pond where we used to ice skate.

- I have no idea what pond he's talking about.

- Exact coordinates are west by north.

- Ha!

[Roxanne purring]

[bleats]

- Guys! We've got company.

- Get away from that thing!

- Wait! - Whoa-oa-oa--

- And we're live.

- Mr. B, you can't do this.

We messed up.

That's no abominable snowman.

- It's my sheep--Roxanne.

[Roxanne bleats]

- [grunting]

My frost-bitten, four-toed right foot that's a sheep!

- We can prove it.

[buzzing]

[Roxanne bleating]

- [coughs] Well...

this is Katherine Mulligan saying

our whole town has been duped,

and Mr. Bolhofner only has nine toes.

- Eight! Lost one on my left foot, too!

- Ugh. - Listen, everyone,

we didn't mean for this to happen.

We really did think there was an abominable snowman

in Royal Woods.

- But when we found out we were wrong,

we covered it up so people wouldn't think

we were bad reporters. - Yeah.

We sure are sorry for scarin' y'all.

- Hang on!

This is Katherine Mulligan saying apology accepted.

We all make mistakes.

I once reported that radioactive mutants

had taken over city hall. [laughs]

- Okay. But that was true.

- Thanks, Katherine. We appreciate it.

- From now on, we promise we'll report only the truth.

- And that's an Action News Team guarantee.

- Yeah, yeah, whatever. Hey, Mulligan.

I got a real story for ya.

Ever see a guy with eight toes?

- No! Stop the camera! Cut! Come on!

- ♪ Cramped inside this tiny space ♪

♪ May sound bad but ain't the case ♪

♪ In the Loud house ♪ - ♪ Loud house ♪

- ♪ Duck and dodge and push and shove ♪

♪ That's the way we show our love ♪

♪ In the Loud house ♪ - ♪ Loud house ♪

- ♪ Laundry piles stacked up high ♪

♪ Hand-me-downs that make me cry ♪

♪ Stand in line to take a pee ♪

♪ Never any privacy ♪

♪ Chaos with kids ♪

♪ That's the way it always is ♪

♪ In the Loud house ♪