07x04 - The Feud!

[bunniefuu]

[announcer] Hello and welcome
to another exciting episode

of the craziest game in the galaxy:

Garfle Warfle Snick.

[audience cheering]

And now here's the host
of Garfle Warfle Snick...

Bob!

Thank you, Norlox. Hi, everybody.

Welcome to another exciting edition
of Garfle Warfle Snick,

the game where anything you garfle
will be warfled, and vice versa.

I'm Bob. Now let's meet
the intergalactic goofballs

we've got playing with us today.

[Allura] What is this place?

Looks like some kind of game show.

-What's happening?
-I don't know.

The last thing I remember,
we were all flying in our lions.

Hi, there. Tell us your name
and where you're from.

-What is this?
-Uh-oh.

Looks like somebody
wasn't listening to Norlox.

-[audience laughing]
-Hmph!

Tell him what this is, everybody.

[audience] Garfle Warfle Snick!

That's right, the name of the game
is Garfle Warfle Snick.

Now tell us your name, son.

My name is Keith.
How did we get here?

I'll tell you how Norlox
got to be on the show.

His uncle owns the studio.

[audience and Bob laughing]

All right, Keith, why don't
you introduce us to the rest of your team?

We're the Paladins of Voltron.

This is Allura, Hunk, Lance, and Pidge.

But you haven't answered my question.
How did we get here?

I hope not the same way I got here.

A moofglider was jackknifed
on the Haldar Expressway

and it took forever to get past it.

I still smell like moof.

[audience] Ew!

Okay, Keith, I'm sure you know
how to play our game.

All you've gotta do is accumulate
quaz-cenbullion credits, and you win.

Of course, if you don't,
you'll hear this sound.

-[sad trombone playing]
-[audience] Aw.

And that means you're trapped here
in our studio for the rest of eternity.

Wait, what?

Did you say we'll be trapped here
for the rest of eternity?

Uh-oh. Is there an echo in here?
Echo in here?

I don't know who you are
or what's going on,

but we're getting out of here.

Oh, I don't think so.

Huh?

[all grunting]

-My feet are stuck.
-Mine, too.

See, all of you are guests on my show

[distorted voice] and you will
play my game as long as I want you to.

[normal voice] Understand?

Great! Let's start with our first warfler.
Tell us what it is, Norlox.

The first warfler is... Pictation!

[audience cheering]

Come on over here, Keith.

Pictation, the drawing game.

Now, Keith, the answers
will pop up on your screen

where your team can't see them.

It's up to you to draw the people
and places you've seen

during your adventures
as a Paladin of Voltron

while your team
tries to guess the answers.

-Are you a good artist, Keith?
-I, uh...

Well, I hope you're a better drawer
than a talker, huh?

-[baby giggling]
-[audience laughing]

Let's put blazzle hoochas on the board.

And... go!

-[female voice] The answer is Arusian.
-[display beeping]

It's a rock! Balmera!

-[Pidge] Olkari cube!
-[Lance] It's a chicken!

When did we see a chicken
in outer space?

I don't know.
It's not my fault Keith can't draw.

Rooster! A chicken hawk.
A chicken with a beard!

-It's an Arusian!
-Correct!

- The answer is Blade of Marmora.
-[display beeping]

[Lance] What is that, chopsticks?

[Hunk] It's something from space, Lance.

[Lance] Space chopsticks?

It's a knife. Sword?

-Oh, oh! Blade of Marmora!
-Right again!

-The answer is Red Lion.
-[display beeping]

-[Lance] Dog! It's a dog!
-[Hunk] It's a lion.

Black Lion, Blue Lion,
Yellow Lion, Red Lion.

Red Lion is right!

-Yeah!
-Way to go, Hunk!

-The answer is Haggar.
-[display beeping]

[Lance] Pepperoni. An alligator!
A cave, a windy cave!

Oh, no, no, no. What is that thing called?
It's a thermos!

[grunts] Lance, would you stop talking?

[timer buzzes]

[Bob] Oh! Time's up.

What? No way that was blazzle hoochas.

Looks like our other team
is gonna have the opportunity to steal.

What other team?

-Zarkon? No way!
-This can't be happening.

-Hello there.
-Hello, Bob.

Why don't you introduce yourself
to the audience and tell us

who these wonderful people are with you?

I'm Zarkon.
This is my lovely wife Haggar.

-Hello.
-Hubba hubba.

My son Lotor and one of my insignificant
underlings, Morvok.

I am such a big fan of the show.
I can't believe we're here!

Well, welcome, welcome.

It's good to have you all on with us,
especially this lovely.

-Hmm? Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
-[audience] Ooh!

[chuckles] Watch it, now.

All right, Zarkon,
have you been watching backstage?

Yes, I have.

The Paladins of Voltron have scored
three correct answers,

but now you and your team
have the opportunity

to steal all of their points

if you can correctly identify
what ol' Keith was doodling on there.

Well, I'd rather steal their lions
than their points.

Yeah, I bet you would.

-Uh, why are they acting like that?
-It doesn't matter.

There's no way we're going to lose
to the Galra.

[chuckles]

But seriously, I think I can guess this.

You might not like the answer.

Uh-oh. Don't wanna stir up any trouble
with the missus.

She doesn't look like that drawing,

but I'm pretty sure
the answer he was going for was...

Fingers crossed.

Is it Haggar?

[Bob] That is correct!
The answer is Haggar.

[audience cheering]

-Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
-[Morvok grunting]

-This is really bizarre.
-Windy cave?

Hey! I'm not a mind reader.

So, Zarkon, you have garfled
the first warfler.

That puts you in control of the board.
Do you wanna play or pass?

Play!

I spent centuries perfecting
my exquisite, lifelike renderings.

Not that you cared.

-I treasure your art.
-Don't touch me, you filthy, filthy hag!

Don't speak to her that way,
you insolent whelp.

[gasps] Ow!

I didn't do nothing!

Family, am I right?

They are quite a handful.

So, what's it gonna be, Z?

Well, I've always said
that the best offense is a good defense.

-Sounds like you're gonna pass.
-I am.

And I think I'd also like to play this.

-[audience] Ooh.
-Uh-oh!

The solo card!

That means one of these Paladins

is gonna have to take
the next warfler alone.

The question is, Zarkon,
which one is it gonna be?

Well, I think there's
really no choice here.

I'm going with the dumb one!

-[squeaking, clanging]
-[speaking gibberish]

Who's he talking about?

It's time for a word from our sponsors.

But when we get back,
Lance will be starting the next warfler

all by his lonesome.

Stick around.

Wait, I'm the dumb one?

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is sponsored by...

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-That's right, we're out of our crankers!
-[mooing]

[Norlox] And now back
to Garfle Warfle Snick.

Right before the break,
Zarkon's team decided

to make one of the Paladins of Voltron
play solo the next round,

and the Paladin he chose
was the dumb one, Lance.

-Hey, Lance, how's it going?
-Well, you know what, I'm not too happy

about being referred to
as "the dumb one," like, 18 times.

Oh, it was only about four times,
you big dum-dum.

[sad trombone playing]

But now you've got a chance
to change all that

and show everyone
how smart you really are.

-Are you ready for that?
-Absolutely.

Okay! Let's give Lance
a big round of applause!

-[audience applauding]
-He is a great sport.

Norlox, tell Lance
what the next warfler is.

The next warfler is Faces From the Past!

A little walk down memory lane.

Lance, you know how this game goes,
am I right?

Yeah! Totally. [grunts]

What do you think, audience?
Do we believe this beautiful dum-dum?

[audience] No!

I know you're telling the truth, Lance,
but just for the folks at home,

let's run through the rules real quick.

Now, you're gonna see pictures
of some of the folks you've met

on your adventures around the galaxy.

All you have to do is tell us their names.

I'll give you a goolian credits
for each one you name correctly,

adding to the points you'll need
to earn your freedom.

How does that sound?

Sounds like we're going to be getting back
to Voltron pretty soon.

That's the spirit!

But just to make sure you don't get
any help from your friends,

let's lower the isolation shield.

Perfect. Now let's see
our first mystery face from the past.

[monitor beeping]

Easy. That's Koli-- What? Who's that?

He's an important figure.

Someone who helped you
in your fight against Zarkon.

Hmm. Keith keeps pointing
at his blade, so...

Oh. That's a pretty big clue.
Have you got a guess?

Blade-y.

-Bladey?
-[buzzer blares]

[Bob] Oh! The answer is Antok.

-Yes!
-[Lance] Oh, yeah, that guy.

Kolivan's right-hand man
who fought valiantly

for the good of the universe.

This next one is a little more personal.
I think you'll remember this gal.

Ooh! Her? Yeah, that's Plax-- Her?

She was the serious one?

That's right. What was her name?

Uh... oh! Hold on. Okay, I know this.

She was the one who measured
my head for the jellyfish hat.

-She rode on a giant manta ray.
-[Bob] We need an answer.

Ah... mm.

Wait, was it Jelly? No, no! Shelly!

-[buzzer blares]
-Her name is Swirn.

Swirn? Huh. [chuckles]
Never would've come up with that.

[Lotor and Morvok] Go Galra! Go Galra!
Go Galra!

[Bob] Your team is starting
to lose faith in you, Lance.

I'm just not real good with names.
I'll get the next one.

I hope so. Let's see the next face
from your past.

[monitor beeping]

[Lance] Finally, a name I know.

Quiznak! Can you guys stop changing it
at the last second?

Hmm. [sighs]

-This guy, this guy...
-You remember.

He faked the distress signal.

-He stole the Blue Lion.
-That, too.

What's his name?

[grunts] Okay.
It's on the tip of my tongue.

Traveled with Nyma and Beezer.

Yeah. Pidge loved that robot.

[inhales]

Nope. I got nothing.

-[buzzer blares]
-[all groaning]

-Rolo!
-Rolo!

You are terrible at this.

To be fair, we've met a lot of people.

Well, this is the last face, Lance.

If you finish without a single
correct answer, you know what that means.

No. What?

[audience] Snick! Snick! Snick! Snick!

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

I can't hear what they're saying.
Is it "Snick"?

That's right! Miss this next question,
and I will be forced to hit this button,

which will sh**t you out of the studio
and into the lair of the Snick.

Show us the Snick, Norlox.

-[audience cheering]
-[roars]

-[screams]
-[Bob] Ooh! [chuckles]

He looks hungry.

What? Nobody said anything
about the Snick!

Well, it's in the title of the show.
Garfle Warfle Snick!

I wasn't listening to that!
You know I'm the dumb one!

Well, here's your last face, dum-dum.
Look carefully.

-[audience cheering]
-Quiet! I need to concentrate!

[monitor beeping]

[whimpers]

-It's Bii-Boh-Bi! Bii-Boh-Bi!
-[jingle plays]

That's right!
You are not gonna get fed to the Snick.

[audience booing]

They are savages.

Well, sorry, Zarkon.
Looks like you're going home.

-It was just fun being on the show.
-Shut up.

[all screaming]

And now, since he's the only person
in the galaxy Lance can remember,

let's bring him out!

Ladies and gentlemen,
star of the hit stick-com, Bii-Boh Me ,

the one and only Bii-Boh-Bi!

[audience cheering]

Bii-Boh, welcome back to the show.

Seems like you've been pretty busy
since we saw you last.

Bii-bi-boh, bi-boh-bii, bii-bii-bii-bii,

bi-bi-boh, bii-bii!

[laughing]

Yeah! [laughing]

Okay, Bii. You're an old pro at this,
so maybe you can help this dum-dum out.

Bii-boh, boh-bii.

Norlox, what is our next warfler?

-It's the Garflater!
-[audience] Oh!

All right, now, as everyone knows,

the Garflater
is worth vezcenbullion credits.

So, Lance, this could get you
and your friends

well on your way to freedom.

Let's do this!

Of course, if you don't answer
five questions correctly,

you'll end up in the Garflator,
where you'll be slowly cooked alive.

-What? Come on!
-Let's put blazzle hoochas on the board.

[monitor beeps]

Bii-Boh-Bi, you're giving the clues,
and remember not to say the word.

-Bii-boh.
-Start the Garflator!

[gulping]

[beeping]

Bii, bii-boh-bi.

Um...

I have no idea what's happening right now.

Bii!

Boh!

-Bii!
-Bii?

-[jingle plays]
-[Bob] Correct!

-Boh-boh...
-Bii?

Bii...

Bii-boh?

[grunts]

Bii-bii?

-[jingle plays]
-That's two!

[all laughing]

-Boh...
-Bii!

-[jingle plays]
-Two more to go!

-Bii-boh-boh--
-[buzzer blares]

[grunts]

You can't say the word.

Bii-boh...

Boh-boh, bii-bii-boh,

boh-bii-boh.

-[jingle plays]
-Yeah!

-Final clue. Running out of time!
-[Warflator gulping]

-Boh-boh-boh!
-Bii-boh-bii-bii?

Boh-boh-boh, boh-boh-boh-boh,
boh-boh-boh!

Bii-bii-bii, boh, bii-boh, boh, boh,

-bii-bii-bii!
-[buzzer blares]

Oh! Oh! [screams]

[Bob] Oh! So close.

[Lance grunting]

[Bob] The answer was Bi.

-I said that!
-Give it up for Bii-Boh-Bi, everybody!

-[audience cheering]
-Bii-boh, bi-bi-bi-bi!

When we come back from the break,
we'll see if Lance's fellow Paladins

can get him out of the Warflator
before he gets turned into hot pudding...

right after this.

[Norlox] Garfle Warfle Snick
is sponsored by Vrepit Sal's!

Come on down to Vrepit Sal's

for family fun
and approved imperial flavors.

For a limited time,
get a Haggar snack pack

every time the Melgregian Fitzers score
three havers in a sprat.

Vrepit Sal's!
Sustenance prepared right.

-[animal clucks, shrieks]
-[knife thuds]

[Norlox] And now back
to Garfle Warfle Snick.

Welcome back, everybody.

The Paladins of Voltron
are trying to win their way off the show,

but they just lost one of their team
to the Warflator.

-How's it going over there, Lance?
-Actually, this feels great.

The goo is nice and warm,
and it feels like it's exfoliating me.

Well, eventually,
it'll eat through your skin.

But let's see if one of your friends
can help you out.

-Well, hello, Princess.
-What are we doing here, Bob?

We're playing the game.

Please let us go.
The universe needs Voltron.

Well, then the Paladins of Voltron
are just gonna have to get serious

about winning this game.

Now, which one of you do you want to play
to free Lance, huh?

-Who's the brainiest of the team?
-[all] Pidge.

All right, little fellow,
step on out here.

[grunts]

Norlox, tell us what the next warfler is.

It's Bankchannel!

-Hey, miniature golf!
-Miniature what?

This game, it's... Never mind.

All right, let me show you
how to play here.

All you have to do is hit the sphere
through the bankchannel into the tunnel.

Easy.

-Think you can do that?
-I think I can handle it.

Hmm. Mmm...

Oh. Very serious.

The hole is over there.

-[Pidge grunts]
-[glass shatters]

[Bob grunting]

[grunts] Let us go now!

-[alarm blaring]
-Huh?

It looks like the Paladins
have just made it into the final round!

What the...

Okay, I know I've said this before
many times,

but this is the freakiest thing
I've ever seen.

One of you will now be allowed
to leave the game.

The rest of you will be staying here
with me forever.

You have blazzle hoochas
to write down your choice

for who should get to escape
on the screen in front of you.

Go!

[Bob] Final hoochas.
Make your selections, everyone.

Hunk, let's start with you.
Who'd you vote for?

Well, Bob, I voted for Allura.

I figured she's the princess,
and she's such a natural leader, you know.

The universe needs her more than
it needs the rest of us, plain and simple.

-[audience] Aw!
-Aw. Thank you, Hunk.

Allura, who did you vote for?

[Allura] I selected Pidge.

She and her family have the best chance
of rebuilding what my father started.

Interesting.
Lance, who got your vote?

[Lance] I voted for Keith.

He's our leader, plus he's half Galra,
so I think he's, like, the future.

[Bob] Keith, the leader, who do you think
deserves to make it out of here, huh?

Lance? Why Lance?

I just don't wanna be stuck here
for eternity with Lance.

Aw!

Thanks, man. Wait, what?

We're down to our very last vote.

Pidge, you're the Paladin
that everyone says is the smartest,

the most analytical, the most logical.

Let's see who you voted for.

-[audience] Aw!
-Hunk? Seriously?

Yeah. Hunk gets along with everybody.

If anyone's gonna go out into the universe
and bring people together, it's Hunk.

Aw, thanks, Pidge.

No one voted for themselves.

Everyone wanted someone else
to get to leave

and every single one of you got a vote.

So, I guess we all get fed to the Snick
or something now, right?

[distorted voice] You all get...

[normal voice] quaz-cenbullion credits!

You win!

[all cheering]

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yeah! Yay!

[Hunk] We're the best!

That's our show, everybody.

From all of us here
at Garfle Warfle Snick,

please have your klanmuirls
spayed or neutered. Good night!

[alarm clock blaring]

[gasps, whimpers]

Oh!

Whoa.

Oh. That was messed up.

Hey, guys.

I just kind of dozed off for a second
and I had this crazy dream.

-Garfle Warfle Snick?
-No way.

You guys saw that, too?

So wait, does that mean Bob is real?

Bob? Did you all just meet Bob?

Coran, you know him?

I've never met him myself,
but I've heard tales.

He's an all-powerful, all-knowing
interdimensional being

who judges the worthiness
of great warriors.

Well, I bet he never met anyone
worthier than us.

The legends say that if you meet Bob
and live to tell the tale,

you're destined for great things indeed.

The guy was kind of a jerk,
though, right?

-[Allura] Completely.
-[Lance] I'm not that dumb!

[Blumfump] Looking for a place
the whole family can enjoy?

Come on down to Luxia's Kingdom.

Ride a seahorse.
Feed Swirn's jellyfish.

You can take a dip
in our new volcanic hot springs

or see the hypnotic Octodancers perform

while snacking on treats
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Luxia's Kingdom, so safe and warm,
you'll wanna stay forever.