06x16 - What About Harry?

[bunniefuu]

Ready to take off?

All set, Charlie.

You're going with Mr. Welch, huh?

Yeah.

Must be top level stuff in Washington.

Oh, it's top level, all right.

We've got a meeting with the Air Force.

Big contract involved.

Hello?

Who?

All right, I'll tell him.

That was a sporting goods store.

Your golf clubs are ready.

Oh, good.

I had some new grips put on.

Think it'll help your game?

Nothing could help my game, Charlie.

Will you pick them up for me around here?

Sure, Dad.

I'll get right over there today.

All right, here's $10, $20, $30, $40, $50.

That'll help more than cover it.

I'll take care of it, Dad.

Just depend on me and have a nice trip.

Well, now take care of yourself.

Everything is under control here.

I know that, Charlie.

Well, say, I thought I'd only be gone a
couple of days, but now Mr. Wells tells me

it might run into a week, so I'll see you when I see you.

Okay, then.

Goodbye, guys.

So long.

Robbie, you be careful of that chunk of dough.

I never saw 50 bucks in one piece until I
was 30, and then it was stage money.

Uncle Charley, do you think I'm still a kid or something?

I can handle money, no problem.

Famous last words.

Well, I dropped them by accident.

Anybody could do that.

I'm glad we got to see him before you left.

Chip and I are getting his papers ready so
he can deliver them.

He pieced me a dime.

Oh, that's very generous.

Yeah, it's a good thing you saw us.

I won't be home for hours with all my deliveries.

You know, Chip, I think one reason it
takes you so long to make your deliveries

is that you've got the basket on the back of your bicycle.

Now, if you had it on the front, I think
you could speed the whole thing up.

I've got a few minutes.

I'll show you what I mean.

OK.

It just seems to me that having it on the
back makes for a lot of wasted motion.

Let's see.

How do you get that off here?

Oh, here we go.

Now, you see, Chip.

What's been taking you so much time is
that when you want to get a paper,

you have to reach around here and then try to
find one and then take it out and then you throw it.

Don't worry if you've got the basket and
the bunch, you just take the paper out and

throw it in one smooth motion, see?

Boy, you can sure tell he went to engineering school.

Wait, I'll show you.

Boy, that sure is smart.

Sure is.

See, one smooth motion.

Hey, Dad, that's great.

Yeah, it really works.

Hey, you see what I mean?

Well, Steve, I didn't know you delivered newspapers in your
spare time, but I was just doing something with the boys.

You see, we'd better go.

I think we have.

Yeah, well, I'll see you then.

Well, why am I glad to see you?

Why me?

Well, because you're a solid citizen and, you
know, you always have a few bucks stashed away.

How much?

Two.

You see, I was, well, I was playing pool and...

Well, I needed to pay for the table, Rob.

Oh, okay, well, sure.

What a roll.

It, uh, belongs to my dad.

I guess I can let you have a deuce.

Girl, I've got that much of my own.

Thanks, Rob.

Look, I'm cutting out.

I've still got 15 minutes left on my table.

Why don't you use it?

Okay, I've got a little time to k*ll.

I think I will.

All right.

Okay, so here's your two bucks for the table.

Thanks, Bill.

Say, is it okay if my buddy here finishes
out the 15 minutes on the hour?

Yeah, sure.

Good.

Okay, so long, Bill.

So long.

You look like a real expert.

Well, I play some.

I'm strictly amateur.

I'm Madonna, and this is my friend Carol.

How do you do?

I'm Robbie Douglas.

Oh, we've just been dying to learn how to play
this game, but we don't know anything about it.

It seems like so much fun.

Well, actually, it's a game of geometric angles.

It's a matter of velocity and angle of Carol.

Carol, I told you we could never understand.

Well, I'd be glad to explain.

Well, maybe you could, you know,
show us how to hold the stick.

And how you put the chalk on the billiards.

No, the chalk goes on the cue stick.

Oh, that's what it's called.

A cue stick.

See, Robbie, we learned something already.

Well, suppose I show you a few basics.

Would you?

Oh, you're a darling, Robbie.

Now, first you, uh...

You rack them up like this.

Well, how many points do you get for racking?

Uh, racking doesn't count anything.

Now, you gotta be very careful.

Get that one ball right.

See, you, uh, you have to get the ba*ls in the pockets.

Now, you, uh, you hold the stick like this.

Watch.

Oh, first you have to chalk up the end to
make sure it doesn't slip off the ball.

Oh, which ball?

The ball you're going to hit, the white one.

It's called the cue ball.

Now, you put the cue ball at this end here.

But the white ball with the lavender
stripes is so much cuter.

Couldn't we use that one?

No, no, you have to hit the white one first.

That's the rule.

Oh.

Now, uh, you break them up just like this and watch them.

Gee, that was great.

You know, you hit the whole bunch at once.

Yeah, but I didn't get any of them in the holes.

You see, that's the way you score.

Every time a ball goes into the pocket
that you aim for, you get a point.

Oh, why don't we all play a game?

We could even bet like I hear the real pool players do.

Uh, all right, I'll rack them up.

Hey, Rob.

Bill.

Glad I caught up with you.

Bill, how much money did you have when you
went into that pool parter?

Six bucks.

Here's the two I borrowed from you.

I brought it from home.

Six bucks.

I thought so.

They got you too, huh?

Robbie, Carol and Donna?

Yep.

Hey, they didn't take you for that whole role.

They did.

The whole works.

My father's $50.

Why didn't you warn me about those girls?

I guess I was too ashamed letting them take me for a chunk.

They said if I didn't pay off, they'd spread it
around campus that I was a bad sport, a welcher.

And they, uh, they had a boyfriend
who was... who was learning karate.

How are you gonna resurrect for $50?

You know, there isn't that much money left in the world.

The money is bad enough, but my father trusted me.

I gotta get that money back before he gets home.

Hello, Ralph.

Uh, have you guys got any dough you could
loan me for a couple of days?

Sure, I'm rich.

I got $170.

That's not going to help much.

What about you, Chip?

Well, I got $4, but I'm committed to
invest it in the business.

Okay, you guys, forget it.

Well, I thought Dad gave you some extra
money to get us golf clubs.

I lost it.

Where?

Well, I did something real stupid, that's all.

But you go to college.

Well, what I did, they don't teach in college.

You can have my $107.

Penny's wrong.

And my $4.

Well, thanks, you guys.

I'll let you know if I need it.

I'd sure like to help Rob out.

I know how he feels about letting Dad down.

Tomorrow's Saturday.

We could wash cars at Mr. Kramer's gas station.

Okay, we'll ask him in the morning.

Benson's Market Delivery Board.

Hey, how you doing?

Did you get married?

Did you get married yet?

Did you remember the chops?

Those last ones were lamb chop flavored chewing gum.

George.

Robbie.

What are you doing?

Oh, well, I'm delivering groceries.

How come you're working all of a sudden?

Uncle Charley, I'm trying to raise some money real fast.

Money?

Well, why didn't you come to me?

I got $11.

I need $50 before Dad gets back.

$50?

$50.

All right, Robbie.

Come on.

Out with it.

Well, you know that money that Dad gave me
for his golf clubs?

Yeah.

I lost it.

All of it.

Playing pool.

What were you doing in a pool room?

Well, I went in to k*ll some time.

Uncle Charley, pool rooms are different
than when you were a kid.

Well, whole families play there.

Okay.

So what whole family took you for a chump?

Two cute children.

Teenage girls.

Teenage girls, huh?

Well, I'll be.

Well, why didn't you come to me?

Because then you would have had to tell
Dad, and I was ashamed.

I told Chip and Ernie not to tell you.

They wanted to help me.

That's why they're out trying to get a job
washing cars at the gas station.

Chip and Ernie washing cars?

I can't even get them to wash their ears.

Here they are, knocking themselves out,
trying to get money for me.

Boy, did I foul up.

Oh, well, maybe with your $11 and Chip and Ernie's money
and what I earn, I can get the clubs before Dad gets back.

Uncle Charley, I'd better get back to work.

Girl pool sharks, huh?

If I was in shape, I'd throw them an old sailor for bait.

Naval in the side pocket.

Now, if I can only get him to play with oranges.

Steve!

Oh, hi, Charlie.

Get out of here.

You're not supposed to be home for a week.

That's a fine welcome.

What happened?

Well, the meeting just got started when
General Baker was called to Omaha,

so we decided to fly home until he could see us again.

What are you so upset about?

What are you doing in here?

I decided to bone up on my pool.

Pool?

With oranges?

Will you go on over to the hotel and check
in over the weekend at least?

Check in?

I just checked out of a hotel.

Charley, why don't you level with me?

What's going on?

The money you gave Robbie to pick up your
golf clubs, he lost the sh**ting pool yesterday.

He lost?

Since when is he a pool player?

He isn't.

If he was a pool player, he wouldn't have lost the money.

He ran into a couple of female sharpshooters.

Girls?

Girls.

And he lost the whole 50?

Yeah, the whole 50.

And in a panic, he got himself a job
delivering groceries at Benson's,

and Chip and Ernie are trying to help by
washing cars at Kramer's gas station.

Well, I guess I should be sore about it.

Aren't you?

Well, I'm disappointed, of course, but...

You know something, Charlie?

The same thing happened to me when I was about his age.

With a couple of cute pool sharks?

Well, no, no, not that, but...

When I was in college, my father sent me
the money to buy lab equipment, and, uh.

...

Well, that same night, a couple of my sharp college
chums volunteered to teach me how to play poker.

I didn't know they were playing for money, and when I
finally realized it, uh... I was too ashamed to back out.

I'm gonna teach you guys how to play pool
and poker for your own protection.

What did your dad do about it?

Well, he never found out.

I finally pulled out of it.

Charley.

Look, uh...

Why don't you take this money and, uh...

give it to Rob as a loan, huh?

No dice, uh...

He knows I got a total of 11 bucks, uh... But, uh... I'd
like to borrow that 50 for a few hours, if you don't mind.

Charley.

You, uh, wouldn't be going down to the
pool hall, would you?

Uh, Steve, uh...

You wouldn't be heading for your office, would you?

Well, as a matter of fact, I have some work to do there.

Well, what would you get down for?

Now, man, please spend the rest of the
day, at least, will you?

Yes.

And take this with you so that the boys
won't know you're here.

Okay, Charlie.

Yeah.

Don't forget to chalk your cue.

I sent you some gas today?

Not today, Tom.

I understand a couple of my boys are helping out.

Yes, they're right there in the back.

Mighty fine spirit, those boys have.

Well, I'm glad to hear that.

You can go back and talk to them.

Help yourself.

All right, fellas.

Dad.

Yeah.

When'd you get home?

Yeah, when'd you get home?

Oh, just a little while ago.

The meeting in Washington was canceled.

I was just on the way to the office.

The fellas got themselves a job washing cars, huh?

Yeah, we thought we'd earn some extra money.

Yeah, that's great.

You haven't seen Robbie, have you?

No, no, I haven't seen Robbie.

That's good.

Hey, I don't have to be at the office for a while.

Why don't I give you fellas a hand?

Hey, that'll be great.

Great, Dad.

Maybe we can incorporate.

Yeah.

Hey.

Oh, hi, Dave.

Hi, I'm glad I bumped into you.

There's a couple of points on that Air
Force contract I'd like to go into.

Oh, well, I was on my way to the office, but
Melody and I stopped by to wash a couple of cars.

Well, now, Steve, there's a lot more money
in this deal than you'll get washing cars.

It's really chipping.

They're trying to earn a little extra money.

It's kind of important.

Well, I didn't know you had it so tough, Steve.

I'll be glad to okay in advance.

I know this contract's important.

It is.

Okay, I'll follow you down to the office.

Fine, fine.

Say, fellas, I'm sorry, but I'm going to
have to renege on helping you watch the cars.

Mr. Welch wants me out at the office right away.

And say, if anybody should ask,
you know, Charlie or Robbie, just tell

them that, well, I'll be home late,
maybe a little before dinner.

Well, how you doing?

I'm slow.

I finished deliveries.

Now I go up and do two hours of homework,
and then I go back to the grocers to clean up.

I figure if Dad stays away a week, I'll make it.

A meeting in Washington was called off.

Your dad's back.

He's at the office.

He'll be home tonight.

Oh, no.

Rob, it's been a long time since I shot
serious pool, but if those girls are still

hanging around, I'm going to get your money back.

Uncle Charlie, you haven't got a chance.

They're sharks.

Maybe, but they can't shuffle a pool table.

Where'd you get that hat and that tie?

I got them 20 years ago when the old Betty
Jane put in at Galveston.

Howdy.

Hi.

You all got a pool table I could buy?

Buy?

I mean rent.

Yes, sir.

Table eight.

You don't have to pay till afterwards.

Well, you folks do things different here.

Where I come from, we always pay in advance.

Well, don't you have anything smaller, sir?

I can't change a 50.

Can't change a $50?

Bill, trying where I come from, that's an insult.

Very well, we'll send us out a boy later.

Right over here, sir.

Howdy, Tex.

Well, how'd you all know my name?

I just figured.

This is my friend Carol, and I'm Donna.

Hi.

Howdy, gals.

My name is Tex, and I'm pleased to make your acquaintance.

Oh, what are you doing so far away from home?

Oh, just flew up on a little business
between bank and bank, mine and his.

Had an hour to k*ll while they overhauled my plane.

I brought the little two-engine job.

Having to see this place reminded me of my living room.

But I sure enjoy the pleasure of your company.

Oh, this is going to be so much fun.

Yes, yes, yes.

Um, how do we begin?

Oh, well, now, you see, you take this here
white ball, they're already racked up,

and you hit this here white ball like this.

Oh, shucks, huh?

I was supposed to hit them and knock some
of them in them there holes.

Oh, is that what all those holes are for?

Yeah.

Well, why don't we play a game, uh, just for fun?

Oh, why not?

I did it!

I did it!

Oh, why don't we gamble a little, you know, play for
money, just to make the game more interesting for you.

Something small?

Oh, well, that would be fun, uh, but no
high stakes, uh, let's say, uh, a dollar a ball?

Fine.

Uh, don't you use chalk?

Sandpaper.

It's the only way.

It's the only way to fly.

Three ball in the corner pocket.

Four ball.

Massey shot.

Massey shot?

Where'd you learn that?

From Mr. Massey.

Come on.

Fifteen ba*ls.

Nine ba*ls.

Here's one I learned in Port Said.

Your, uh, your trip cut short?

Yeah, it wasn't.

Well, welcome home.

Thanks.

I've got your golf clubs here.

Fine.

Guy did a real good job on the grips.

Well, that's great.

Oh, excuse me.

I want to go over and talk to Chip a minute.

Just stick them in the closet, will you, Ram?

Okay, Dad.

Boy, thanks, Uncle Charley.

For what?

Just because a couple of squabs thought I was a pigeon?

Hey, Chipper, it just seems to me you're
using a lot of wasted motion.

Now, instead of breaking the leaves up
into a lot of little piles, why don't you

start at one end and, well, here,
I'll show you what I mean.

Now, uh...

Hey, Chip.

Chip?

You want it on the phone.

Okay.

That's Elvis.

I'll be right back.

Oh, okay, Chip.

Oh, hello, Mr. Douglas.

Oh, uh, hello, Miss Ferguson.

Chip just went to answer the phone.

Oh, well, would you, uh, give this to him for me?

Oh, yeah, sure.

Oh,

we're doing a very good job.

Thank you.

Steve?

Oh, hi, Dave.

I was just raking the neighbor's leaves.

So I see.

I was helping Chip.

Now, Steve, I just dropped by to tell you
that General Baker's back in Washington.

He's waiting to talk to us.

Oh, good, good.

Now, you know, Steve, when this deal goes
through, there's a bonus in it for you.

So maybe you won't have to, uh, peddle
papers or wash cars or rake the leaves.

Actually, Dave, the reason I've been doing
these things is...

Don't tell me, Steve.

Let's keep it your secret.

Now, we'll fly to Washington tonight on
the 7 O'clock plane, and we'll be able to

see General Baker first thing in the morning.

Oh, fine, fine.

That'll give me time to wash up and
pack and, uh... And, uh, finish the leaves.

Yeah.

Now, I'll see you, Steve.

Okay, Dave.