03x15 - Mother Bub

[bunniefuu]

Past participle comido, comiendo, comido, comiendo, comido.

Good morning, Rob.

Buenos dias, buenos dias, buenos dias.

All I said is good morning.

Bub?

Yeah, now what?

How can you say now what?

I just got up.

Well, now what?

Now that you just got up.

I can't find a clean shirt.

Well, look in the washing machine.

Okay.

Okay.

Now don't slam the door when you come back in.

Vendree, Vendron, Vendree, Vendron.

Boy, it sure is a good thing I wasn't born a Spaniard.

I'd really be in trouble.

So would the Spaniards.

Hey, Bub, do you know what dangling participles are?

Yeah, and I wish you'd keep them off the paper.

Thanks a heap.

Bub?

Yeah?

The only shirt I could find was wet.

Well, put it on and go out in the sun.

Bub, if you want a ride to the market, you better hurry up.

All right, I'm ready.

What about breakfast?

What about it?

Well, I haven't had any yet.

Well, oatmeal time around here is 7.30 sharp.

Bub, I'm going out and start the car.

All right.

I thought I told you not to slam that door.

Boy, I not only got to wear a wet shirt,
but on an empty stomach.

How about yesterday's shirt?

It's got a button on it.

Well, put it back on.

How?

With a pin.

How else?

Es de esta man era.

It's this way.

Robbie?

Es de esta otra man era.

It's another way.

How long before I'll start liking girls?

Es de...

I'll give you a couple of years.

Why?

I just wanted to know how long it'd be
before I get someone to saw my buttons.

Well, don't hold your breath.

Have you got a pin?

Yeah.

Es correcto.

That's right.

Thanks.

I'll get it.

Hello?

Yeah, this is me.

Is this you, Sudsy?

Yeah.

What are you doing?

Well, I guess I can come over.

Okay, see ya.

That was Sudsy.

¿Qué le pasa?

What's the matter with him?

Well, he wants me to come over.

¿Qué es lo que pasa?

What's the matter?

He saw something he wants me to see.

¿Qué import a?

What does it matter?

I don't know.

Nothing, I guess.

¿Ella está aquí?

I'll see you, Rob.

¿Ella está aquí?

Quiero UN taxi, por favor.

I want a cab, please.

See you, Rob.

Guarde El cam bio.

Keep the change.

So long, Chip.

Have a nice day.

Oh, don't worry, Robbie.

I will.

Be careful.

Sure, Robbie, I will.

Hurry home.

No hablo.

Don't worry, Rob.

I will.

Boy, I bet Sudsy has all his buttons.

Hi, Chipper.

Hi, Chip.

Boy, am I glad to see you.

Very glad to see you.

Hi, tr*mp.

Hi, Rob.

Mike.

Say, haven't we seen him someplace before?

Yeah.

Yeah, the face seems familiar.

You know me.

I'm the fellow that pays the bills around here.

Oh, yes.

Suddenly, I remember.

Boy, it sure has been not a long time
since you got that new rocket into orbit.

Well, I think so.

It hasn't come down yet.

Dad, there's some cold soup if you're hungry.

Oh, good.

Good.

Hi, Steve.

I'll get it.

Douglas, President.

Who?

There's right here.

It's for you.

Probably the plant.

Hello.

Yeah, Dave.

I just got in.

You going to be home for a while this time, Dad?

I hope so, Chip.

What was that, Dave?

My birthday is next week.

Oh, you just had one.

That was a year ago.

Golly, I guess it was.

Oh, no, everything went fine, Dave.

I'll get your suitcase, Dave.

Thanks, Mike.

There were a few problems, but nothing.

You weren't here on my last birthday.

Hey, Mark, why don't you leave the suitcase by the door?

It's never home long enough to unpack anyway.

I'll go.

Or the birthday before that.

Well, Dave, there's a great deal of work
to be done before we take a shot at Mars.

You haven't got enough clean shirts to go to Mars.

As far as I'm concerned, the nuclear
electric engine is the answer.

Yeah, of course.

Excuse me, Dave.

Chip.

Don't go, huh?

Look, Dave, I haven't had a chance to say
hello to my family yet.

Yeah.

All right, fine, I'll see you tonight.

So long.

Chipper.

Stop.

At Arbison's toy shop, too?

Sure we can.

I don't know how long it's been since I've
been in a toy store.

Bub, Chip and I are going out.

Now, Chip, this is quite a toy, but... It's got everything.

$100, huh?

You started with the crank.

The crank?

Yeah, it's a new gimmick.

Well, what won't they think of next?

What do you hear the horn?

That's a new gimmick, too, I suppose.

Yeah, it's the latest.

Try it.

No, I'd better not, Chip.

Go ahead, just once.

Now, look here, fellas.

I'm sorry.

Don't worry, everyone has to try it once, I guess.

You know, I wouldn't mind having one
myself if I could get in it.

I can get in it.

Well, a couple of other fathers were in today.

Each bought one.

They did, huh?

Probably oil men.

Here's something that intrigues the adults.

Space age toys.

Well, what do you know?

Dad.

This is my favorite.

Amazing.

This liquid fuel unit looks like the real thing.

I think you need a lunar heat shoe, Carol.

You know, direct sunlight reaches 212 degrees on the moon.

We don't have much trouble with lunar heat in here.

You've seen this little fellow before.

Now, everything's A-OK.

Now, if we were outside and had a room,
and it was loaded, of course, all I would

have to do was count down and pull this string.

Five, four, three, two, one.

That's who loaded this thing.

I've done that this week.

You're really good, aren't you?

Dad.

Dad, if you do plant the toy, how about the car?

Oh, now, Chipper, I don't know how that
would fit into the budget.

We'll have to think about it, huh?

Why don't we go get that soda?

Sure.

Thanks for the demonstration.

Only at Sears.

Hurry in.

Hi, Dad, come on in.

Get the car yet?

I'm not sure.

What's that mean?

Well, Dad's thinking about it.

From my house, that means... Dad's
thinking about it, but Mom ain't thinking about it.

When you get the car, can I drive it?

What do you give me?

How about my genuine petrified lizard?

You throwing your tiger's tooth with the silver filling?

Uh-huh.

Okay.

I hate to interrupt anything, but would
you guys like some orange juice?

Sure, Bub.

Thanks, Mr. O'Casey.

I know it's quite a trip out to that
kitchen, but do you think you could make it?

I know a shortcut.

A shortcut?

I think you would.

Just as he gets your feet down off my couch.

He sounds a little like my mom,
and a little like the bulldog next door.

I've got a bulldog, either.

Hey, I know how you can sense that car.

How?

Dads will buy their kids anything when
they're sick, so you're sick.

Yeah.

With a little luck, I might even feel worse than terrible.

Oh, Bub.

When's Dad going to be home?

Well, you know how those night business meetings are.

Uh-huh.

Where does it hurt the most?

On my back.

But you're rubbing your stomach.

Well, the pain.

It goes all the way through.

Maybe just some ice cream would help.

The bag gets here.

Well, what kind of ice cream do you think
would help the most?

See, I can.

Okay.

We have peach pecan?

Well, it might taste a little like tutti frutti.

Bob?

Yeah?

Maybe some peanuts on top?

Naturally.

I.

Got away from that meeting as soon as I could.

Is Chip feeling any better?

Well, he can't be too sick.

He just ordered peach pecan ice cream with peanuts.

Oh.

Well, maybe he's got a fever.

Fever my foot.

He's just putting on a knack to get something.

Well, Chip wouldn't do a thing like that, Bub.

He must really be sick.

Yeah?

Boy, Susie, you sure got great ideas.

Yeah, I've got paint I haven't even used yet.

Huh?

Huh?

Susie, Susie, all of a sudden I really don't feel good.

Yeah, see ya.

How was the meeting, Dad?

Oh, it went very well, Chip, thank you.

Well, good night.

Chip, why don't you come into my room with me?

I want to talk to you.

Well, it's pretty late.

Oh, I think you can manage to stay up a
few more minutes, then.

Sit down.

Now, tell me, why the big act?

Well, Sudsy said if I got sick, he'd buy me the little car.

Oh, he did?

He said I could work you, because you're a
father, and fathers are patsies.

He said you could work me because fathers are patsies?

Do you think I'm a patsy?

Guess not.

What other bits of advice did Sudsy give you?

Well.

He said that it's mothers that stop everything.

Because I don't have a mother.

I got a real setup.

Oh.

I'm sorry, Dad.

I'll never do a clunky thing like this again.

Maybe we don't have the best setup in the
world around here, but I think Bub does a

pretty good job of mothering us all, don't you?

Who wants a dumb old mother?

I'm lucky I don't have a mother messing
everything up for me.

They yell at you and barge around and pat
you on the head and worry about you, too.

Sure.

Chip, listen to me.

Mother's a tough, fuzzy, I don't know, he's that one.

Do you remember this picture?

Who's that funny looking kid?

That's you.

It's your first birthday.

Your first birthday cake.

Did my mother make it?

No, no.

No, this picture was taken after, uh, well,
right after Bub came here to take care of us.

It's the first cake he ever baked.

It was pretty good, too.

I don't remember it.

No, of course you don't.

But I'll bet Bub does.

I remember you, uh, you took a big fistful of marshmallow
frosting and clobbered him right over the head with it.

No kidding.

Oh, here's, here's one of your first day at school.

Bub took you.

He said he'd take you the first three times,
and from then on, you were on your own.

Yeah, but I saw him watching me from behind a tree one day.

Oh, and a couple of bullies were giving
some of the younger kids a bad time,

and, uh, I guess Bub didn't want you to get hurt.

He sure got clunked in the eye with it.

That apple hair throwing at me.

Yeah, he got quite a shiner, didn't he?

Yeah, it was purple and blue and green.

Yeah, yeah.

And the one he painted on you to match his
wasn't too bad, either.

Yeah.

You remember the time you gave Bub the measles?

Oh, yeah.

We had a contest to see who had the most spots.

Yeah, and Bub won.

Yeah, but he counted the spots on top of his head.

It wasn't fair, was it?

Sure wasn't.

Dad?

Hmm?

Can I have these pictures put on my bulletin board?

Sure you can, Chip.

Here, give it a blow.

Is it okay if I dream about getting a little old car?

Sure, it's okay.

Can't stand its suffrage.

Okay, Camille.

Very important automobile toy.

Whenever you want something around here,
why don't you do as I do?

Save stamps.

Yeah, Dave.

Oh, it's, it's, uh, it's nothing.

He's all right.

Yeah.

Oh, no.

Oh, look, Dave, can't you send someone else?

No, but it's just that I wanted to be home this week.

It's Chip's...

Yeah, I understand.

Yeah, of course.

Okay.



Flight 527.

What airline?

Okay.

Yeah.

All right.

Okay, then.

It's a good thing you didn't unpack that.

Yeah.

Where to this time?

Washington.

Of course, it's urgent.

You're not going to miss Chip's birthday again.

I'm afraid I am, Mike.

Just can't be helped.

I'm.

A genuine petrified lizard, and I get to
drive that little car?

By the time I get that car, I'll be older
than your petrified lizard.

That's what you think.

Somebody get that.

Chip, answer the door.

I got it the last time.

Don't strain yourself, Chip.

Douglas residence?

Sure is.

Sign here, please.

Yeah.

Hey, Chip, look at this.

Boy.

How about that?

Boy, what a b*mb.

Oh, my God.

Gosh.

See, I told you fathers are patsies.

Well, what do you think, Chip?

Man, oh, man.

Gosh.

Wish I could stay, Chip, but Mom's expecting me home.

You can use it this morning.

I won't need it till the staff.

How do you like it, Chipper?

Did you really get this for me, Dad?

Yeah, we call it a going away present, huh?

Boy, thanks a lot.

Well, Bub, how do you like it?

I ordered it for him first thing this morning.

When are you going to get him the next time he calms you?

What did you pay for the thing?

Well, it, uh, it was around a hundred dollars.

Around a hundred dollars?

Well, I know it was kind of expensive.

Well, you must be out of your mind.

Well, that kid won't play with
that toy more than a day or two

when it'll wind up in the
garage along with that other junk.

Besides, where is he going to drive it?

Around here.

Look, Bub, it's already here.

I can't very well send it back, can I?

I'll take care of that part of it.

I'll...

Gosh, Bub, Dad said I could have it.

Yeah?

Well, it might be okay with your dad,
but it's not okay with me.

Why can't I have it?

Because I say you can't, that's why.

Well, gosh, Bub.

No!

Well, I haven't practiced in longer.

I guess you better send the car back, Dad.

But, Chipper, I thought you really wanted that car.

Well, I can get along without it.

I guess I'm stuck with Bub.

Where are you going?

Over to Sudsy's.

You tell him he hasn't got anything I haven't got.

How about combing out that pile of straw
that you call hair?

You're commencing to look like tr*mp.

Okay, Bub.

I'll be back here in time for lunch.

What do we have?

Homemade spaghetti, if the delicatessen's open.

Okay.

Come on, Dad.

Have a good trip.

Goodbye, Chipper.

You know, I don't understand it.

You're telling me he can't have something
and he likes you for it.

How could you understand?

You've never been a mother.

Well, I'd better get going.

Yeah.

Now, don't you worry about anything around here.

I won't.

Not right.

I will.

And take care of yourself.

I will, Bob.

I mean, Mother Bob.

Don't you forget it.

Look,

up in the sky, it's a bird, it's a plane, it's
not Superman, it's My Favorite Martian.

Stay tuned for two episodes of My Favorite
Martian during this twice as nice morning on TV Land.

My Favorite Martian.