02x02 - The Ticcer

[bunniefuu]

Colin sucked George Washington's
d*ck -- Colin gave Tootsie

gonorrhea, and Tootsie gave
Colin gonorrhea -- g*dd*mn!

My name is associated
with a lot.

Listen, no one's safe.
No one is safe.

I can tell you that.

It's not bad, it's just --
agh, God.

I have Tourette syndrome.

f*ck you, b*tch.

And me and Colin are not
married yet.

-[laughing]
-Run! Run! Sprint!

Do you guys let
the alpacas be at weddings?

We haven't started
a single thing.

-No wedding planning done.
-Yeah.

Nothing.

So that's the first thing
we're thinking about

is if alpacas are coming?

'Cause you haven't really
asked me for any help, so...

That's our first child
that's engaged to be married.

I would love to be
super-involved.

-Yeah, honey.
-OK. [larynx squeeze]

This is about me and my dad
because I need clarity.

I heard that Colin asked
for y'all's blessing,

and you said that there was
no blessing to give.

I mean it to be like, "I'll do
whatever Baylen wants to do."

That is my blessing.
That is my like,

"Hey, if Baylen's OK,
we are OK."

What's really sunk in that...
now it's them,

it's not her, it's them.

We have been talking
about our marriage,

and it started
with some premarital counseling.

I thought everything was fine,

but this is
definitely a curveball.

So I don't want you guys
to be offended,

but I think some premarital
counseling

would be a good tool to have.

Right now, I feel weird

that my parents are bringing up
premarital therapy.

I'm sure this wasn't
the birthday gift

Colin was expecting.

[larynx squeeze]

[Julie]
It's not to test your fit.

This isn't like, "Let's see if
we fit, and if we don't,

we're breaking up."
That's not...

-And you and Dad did this?
-Yeah --

that's not the -- mm-hmm.
-It was a requirement

to get married in church.

It was a requirement
in the Catholic diocese.

You know, like,
we want you guys to really,

like, get everything
that you can in your corner.

-Get as grounded as possible.
-That's exactly it.

I finally feel like things are
in a better place

with the Duprees.
It's my birthday.

We're all getting along
and having a good time.

And then premarital counseling
popped up,

and it's a complete shock.

That's important stuff.

It really is,
because life is tough.

Yeah, it is.
You add children and --

f*ck them kids.

It doesn't hurt to,
kind of, tackle

some of the other intricacies

that will come into play
as your marriage develops

over the years.

I know that Allen and Julie are
always just trying to help,

but I just hope
that they don't think

Baylen and I's relationship

is not a healthy relationship.

All right, guys.
It's getting late.

Thank you for having us.

I appreciate you guys
for coming.

Yes -- I was, like,
nervous about saying anything

'cause I didn't want you
to be offended.

Please don't be offended.

[Baylen]
I don't feel offended.

I want you to be
the opposite of offended,

I want you to be like...
-We want you to be able to --

..."OK, they want it
to work."

I think this suggestion could be
perceived a little harshly

only because Al was
a little tough with Colin.

I'm very confident that Colin
is committed to Baylen,

but I do have some reservations

about how healthy,

and happy the relationship
will be...

-Love you.
-...if you don't make sure

that you're growing together
as a team.

[sighs]

So what do you think?

-Of the marriage counseling?
-Are you offended?

Um...

[Baylen]
It's hard to read you sometimes.

It's our relationship,
our marriage, and given...

the history, like,
it's not always been like,

a easy pathway
with your parents.

You know that.
It's been kind of rocky, so...

OK.

I think it really just comes
down to her parents being

really overprotective
and wanting

the best for Baylen.

And I feel like I'm trying
to do everything in my power

to show that to them,
that I want the same thing,

that we're on the same page.

And sometimes it just feels
like it's never enough.

I just appreciated them
bringing it up personally.

[Colin]
Mm-hmm.

'Cause I didn't look at it
as a bad thing.

OK.

I think for right now,

I just want to take some time
to think it over,

maybe...
-Suck d*ck.

...talk to my parents,
family members

that may have done something
like this, and kind of get

their opinion on it as well.

[upbeat music plays]

Good morning, everybody!
Good morning.

Today, we're taking
our first tour

of a possible wedding venue.

But before we leave,
I need Colin's help putting in

hair clip-ins that I bought.

For Narnia!

Can I have some help here
trying to section this?

-Help doing what?
-Do you know how to section?

-No, I do not.
-OK.

I don't know how you do
your own f*cking hair.

It's called, I wake up,
put water in it, and I go.

You bend over
the sink and you f*cking...

Put water in it and go.

[Baylen] So a few months ago,
I asked Colin to trim my hair

because I was like,
"You know what?

She's looking
a little bit dead."

And that led to my hair
being chopped off.

-Colin?
-Yeah?

Agh...

You just...

pulled my hair off.

To help my baldness,

I got webbed-in
hair extensions.

I am now luscious
Goldilocks, OK?

I feel like I've just
added life to my head.

I was more relaxed
at the salon,

and so I wasn't ticcing
as much,

but the next day, I was yanking
on my exten -- my weave.

g*dd*mn!

I was pulling on my hair
extensions,

to the point where
it was painful,

'cause the webbed-in
extensions

is sewed
into your head.

I had them
for a solid two weeks

before I had to get them
taken out.

-So tease the hair.
-Mm-hmm.

[sighs]

Now I'm trying to clip in
extensions,

which I hope don't
set my tics off as much,

'cause I can take them out
when I need.

Get all that sh*t
out of here.

sh*t.

sh*t --
[thud] -- sh*t.

[thumping]

Weenie.

[under breath]
Oh, oh, oh -- OK.

Alright, alright.

Doing Baylen's hair and trying
to put these hair clip-ins

into her hair...
-It's a struggle.

Yeah, it's a struggle.

It's especially hard
for me to sit still,

getting my hair done,
getting clip-ins.

Just sitting still in general
is not good.

Is not good.

It's not working.

-So, no to the hair?
-This isn't working.

-We're saying no to the hair?
-Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

OK...OK.

Just add hair
to the list of things

that are more complicated
when you have Tourette.

I'm excited

that we don't have to do this
for another two hours

and we can go
and see our wedding venue.

[Baylen] First question,
"Do you guys allow alpacas?"

And no?
Walk right out.

♪♪ The city below
Is calling my name ♪♪

I know we've looked at a lot
of wedding venues online.

I can't make up my mind
with what I want

and what I like,

but, I mean, I'm not
the biggest fan of indoor.

Today we're going to look
at an indoor wedding venue,

and I don't really know
if I'm going to like it

because, like, I want, like,
scenery in the background

while we get married.

I think that we should be open
to an indoor wedding venue

because thunderstorms trigger
Baylen's anxiety

and make her Tourette's worse.

-[Baylen screams]
-Oh...

[Baylen humming]

If it were to somehow
thunderstorm on our wedding,

it would just make it easier

if everything's already indoors.

[larynx squeeze]

It is actually...

f*cking dumbass!

f*cking state law bullshit,

Exit!
One weenie.

Traffic...info...call!

Weenie, weenie, weenie.

I'm losing my f*cking mind.

Why am I on this side?

I'm just gonna start looking
this way.

g*dd*mn, sponsored by --
[screaming] Joe Biden!

-[Baylen sighing]
-Just look down.
Look down.

When I see road signs
and I repeat them,

it's because
of my lexilalia.

Lexilalia is a complex vocal tic
that can also be

associated
with many other conditions,

but also can be
included in Tourette.

I read something,
then I vocalize it as a tic.

So, have you thought
any more

about the premarital counseling?

I personally
don't have a problem

with trying the therapy.

Yeah, it just makes me think
that, like, your parents think

our relationship
isn't as good as it is.

They brought up
premarital therapy

out of the love
that they have for us.

-Yeah, but, OK.
-What?

If someone gets involved

in our relationship
or marriage too much,

where does it end?

There's got to be a line that's
got to be drawn somewhere --

where does it end?
-[Baylen] Yep.

Am I marrying Baylen,
or am I marrying Baylen,

Julie, and Allen?

Are they gonna be over
every single day,

involved in our household

every single day,
or are we gonna be able

to have our own marriage
and family?

I mean, I would love to have
my parents over every day.

I mean, I'm not even gonna lie.

Family's really,
really important.

-You OK?
-What?

You just said, "I would love
to have my parents over

every single day."

Is this what our marriage is
gonna be like?

-Are your tics OK?
-Yeah,

I'm gonna take my shoes off,
'cause you see

how it's like around my ankle?

When I hold my tics in
at the venue, later on,

they will all come out at once.

I'm experiencing a dystonic tic
in my foot and in my leg.

So when my foot's locked,
I'm twisting my ankle

to the point where I want
to snap my ankle off.

Come on, Bechs!

Hoo-hoo-hoo!
g*dd*mn!

This is actually
our team mascot,

The Ticcer.
That's me.

The Ticcer's here!

[Colin]
You just said, "I would love
to have my parents over

every single day."

Is this what our marriage is
gonna be like?

I know how close you
and your parents are.

Close d*ck.

But you're becoming more
independent, and do you think

your parents being so involved
is them not being...

able to fully let you go?

I don't think they ever will.

I do think that my parents
hold on a little bit more

because of my Tourette syndrome.

It's gonna be
a constant juggling act

throughout our relationship.

I hear you.

I do see where my parents are
coming also

with the premarital therapy,
because the relationship

has worked out
and they've taken it.

Have your parents taken it?

My parents did take it,
they went through the church,

but they did do
something similar.

So I talked to my mom
about premarital counseling,

and she thinks
that it would be good for us.

However, I still am
on the fence about everything.

I mean,
what if it opens up stuff

that we just aren't ready
to deal with?

So, I mean,
let's make the best of it,

and maybe it could end up
being really helpful.

♪♪ If your heart's been aching ♪♪

♪♪ Drop the weight
You'll live without ♪♪

[Colin speaking]

[Baylen]
Yeah.

It's so pretty!

♪♪ Just be it now ♪♪

[Colin]
So CrystalView
is about 30 minutes away

from where we live.

At this point,
we really don't know

what we want versus
what we don't want.

We're really just, kind of,
looking at all the options

to figure that out.

This is even better
than the website.

[Baylen]
It's so pretty.

You know how to work one
of those?

I'm going backwards
into the revolving door

because I don't want to touch it

because of my OCD
and having a fear of germs.

I'll wear, like, long sleeves

to purposely, like,
touch things.

Or you'll just wait ten feet
back and wait for me

to open the door.
-Yeah, yeah.

[clicks tongue]
OK.

[sumptuous music plays]

[Colin]
Oh, my gosh!

This is pretty.

My first impression
of the wedding venue

when we walk in
is breathtaking,

because of the stairs
and the flowers

and everything being white.
But it's very echo-ey.

And with my tics, it just
makes me very insecure.

Hey, Colin.
Hey, Baylen --

how are you?
-It's nice to meet you.

-Nice to meet you -- Amanda.
-How are you?

-Colin.
-Nice to meet you.

Welcome to Crystal View.

-Lots of bling.
-So -- lots of bling.

Lots of glam,
we love our chandeliers.

[larynx yelp] -- g*dd*mn.

I don't think we've had anybody
get married here

that's had Tourette's syndrome,

but we are aware of tics,
and I think

it's important
with our knowledge to create

an environment and an atmosphere
that's comfortable

for that individual,
and that's what focus today.

-When did you guys get engaged?
-Last year.

-I love it, I love it.
-So you've had some time
to think --

have you thought about
colors, theme,

anything for the big day?

-I love where it's like,
very colorful...
-Yeah.

...and very bright,
and I love oranges and pinks.

-She loves flowers.
-Yes, I love flowers --
I'm obsessed with flowers.

Perfect.

I found a baby-pink dress
that I really, really liked.

-No.
-And I showed him
and he was like, "No."

So I was like,
"OK, well, I guess that's it."

There's certain things
that can have color

and then other things, like --
-And I listened!

-You're not showing up in
a pink dress or a purple dress.
-And I listen.

-It's just not going to happen.
-But I listen.

That's the thing.
It's like, if he says,

"I don't really want to be
in a pink tux,"

I'll be like, "OK, can we have
a pink bow tie?"

So there's different ways
that we incorporate it,

but I don't really
want the wedding...

What?

-Nothing.
-Fine, I'll stop talking.

So the ceremony space is
really a hop, jump, and a skip

from your reception space.

Welcome.

OK.

[Christina]
I call it the "Bridgerton" room.
No, I'm kidding.

-[all laugh]
-[Baylen] Pretty much.

The vow exchange typically
in between the mirrors,

and then theater-style seating
on both sides of the column.

And then the magic fills in
all the gaps with the florals

and the columns
and all the beauty.

[Colin]
Yeah, that's nice.

[Baylen] This place
is really fancy-smancy.

It is very blingy.
It's very blingy.

[Colin] Can we see
the reception space?

-[Christina] So let's
head on that way.
-All right.

[Colin speaking]

I can definitely tell that
Baylen's holding in her tics.

I don't want her to go
through that.

I always want her to feel free
and be herself.

I still want to see
the rest of the venue,

but this does make me think

that this might not be
the right one for us.

Here's the ballroom.
Welcome to the grand ballroom.

[Colin]
Oh, wow.

-This is massive.
-[Baylen]
This is definitely grand.

-[Colin] It's really nice.
-[Baylen]
I like these chandeliers too.

-I have a question.
-Yes.

Have you guys ever had alpacas
at a wedding?

-Absolutely,
in the tent outside.
-[Christina] Yes.

-The bride made the exact
same face on that day.
-Yes, yes!

-Have they been allowed inside?
-No.

Colin,
that's not a deal-breaker.

I told Colin, I said,
"Deal-breaker, no alpacas."

We're having a white horse
for an upcoming event.

So we love animals here.
We love animals here.

We don't like horses.
I'm petrified of horses.

-[Amanda] OK, sorry.
-He's like, "Yeah.

"Let's get all the horses --

let's ride horses in here."
-[Amanda] We'll stick
to alpacas for now.

That would be sick
wedding photos!

Us on a horse?

You love alpacas that love
to kick people.

I like horses.

The one animal
that I'm more than afraid of is

a meaty horse.
Like -- your mom's a wh*re!

Marlene's a dirty,
filthy horse.

Sorry.

I feel like I just heard
Marlene and heard the word

"wh*re," and that's
how we integrated.

So we won't be going down
to see her

until the tic goes away,
actually,

'cause I don't actually
want to make

eye contact with her
when I say that, so...

-Thank you guys so much.
-Thank you.

-[Amanda] You're so welcome.
-[Christina] Thank you so much,
thank you.

-Thank you.
-Lots to talk about --
have a great day.

-Thank you -- yeah.
-Do we go up this way?

All right, so --

How did you feel
about everything?

I feel like you already know
what you want to say,

so go ahead.

It's too glam for me.

It was great
that they allowed, like...

the alpacas.
-Mm-hmm.

But I want, instead
of the place to be luxury,

we make it look luxury,
if that makes...like, any sense.

I feel the same way.

I think it's just a little bit
too boozy -- bougie for us.

-Boozy, bougie d*ck.
-Boozy, bougie.

-Definitely CrystalView --
I can see the name now.
-Yep.

The Crystal, really --
crystal meth.

Joe Biden does crystal meth!

Joe f*cking Biden
and J-f*cking-B

do crystal meth together
in my basement.

[Colin]
That's a crazy combo.

[Baylen]
JB is the head of photography,

and he is always
in my peripheral vision.

So that is where
the tic comes from.

Our director of photography
right here doesn't do
crystal meth.

Yeah.
Nailed it -- [blows raspberry].

[short whimper] -- [chuckles].

wh*re!
W-H-hockey-sticks-O-R-E.

-[thud] -- ow.
-Are you OK?

[light knocking]

[heavy, shaky breathing]

-I'm gonna -- I'm gonna take --
-Are your tics OK?

Yeah, I'm gonna take
my shoes off, 'cause you see

how it's like around my ankle?

[Baylen]
When I hold my tics in
at the venue,

it's incredibly painful.
It's uncomfortable.

And later on,
they will all come out at once.

I'm experiencing a dystonic tic
in my foot and in my leg.

It's basically like
a locking and a twisting.

So, when my foot's locked,
I'm twisting my ankle

to the point where
I want to snap my ankle off.

[Baylen]
Weenie.

[sighs]

During the tour,
did you hold your tics?

Maybe a little bit,

'cause I started ticking,

and it was like, echoing,
and I was like, "OK."

My wedding day has been
something that I've always

dreamed of, and me holding in
my tics would look

like a disaster.

Your mom's a filthy, fat wh*re.

I could have a tic attack
in front of all my guests,

because it's pretty much bound
to happen

when I hold my tics in.

[short whimper]

Between my Tourette's --

I have Tourette's
syndrome stupid --

and my OCD,
obsessive-compulsive d*ck,

I'm not like every other bride.

So who knows what we have
in store for us?

Me and Colin just looked
at our first wedding video.

Baylen's my first kid
getting married.

And as a mom, I've poured
my heart into her.

So a little part of me feels
like a tiny bit left out.

♪♪ Sunshine, I feel alive ♪♪

♪♪ And nothing's
Gonna stop us now ♪♪

Come on, Bechs.

[Baylen]
Have a good rest of your day.

With my tics, I don't drive,
so today I took a rideshare

from D.C.
to Bechnir's baseball game.

It's his first game
of the season,

and I haven't been to one
of his games in a long time

because there's a lot of things
that will set my tics off.

For example, I purposely missed
the beginning of the game

because the silence...

during the National Anthem is
a huge trigger for my tics.

I tend to just be cussing away
and everyone's just

looking my way.

So there's a rhyme
for the day.

Oh my God!
And all that rhymed!

Whoo-hoo, whoo-hoo,
whoo-hoo, f*ck you, Kevin.

Hey, baby!

[Baylen]
Hi.

But these are parents
with Bechnir's team.

All of those people know
my mom.

All of those people know
that I have Tourette.

So it's a safe space,

and I'm here
to support Bechnir.

-How was your trip?
-I shopped the whole way here.

-You did what?
-I shopped the whole way here
on my phone.

Of course.
Shocker.

-Yeah.
-[Julie] Bechy's playing
shortstop.

Hi, Bechnir!

Oh, my gosh!

Double d*ck -- zero.

That's where he's playing.

-Yeah. Yeah.
-OK.

Only Bechs would pick out
a pink glove.

Yeah, he used to play center
field, but now he's shortstop.

[Baylen] We need to get him
pink cleats, too.

[Julie] Mhn-mhn.
No, he's fine.

[umpire]
He's out!

-Loud.
-Confident -- he's a lot.

-Are you guys talking about me?
-No.

Make room.

You're going in the middle?
OK.

[Baylen]
"Make room."

I heard you were saying
something about my confidence.

-What's wrong with it?
-Nothing.

-Nothing's wrong with it.
-We love it.

-[woman] All right --
-Come on, Bechs!

-[Julie] Oh, Bechs, jeez.
-[umpire speaking indistinctly]

OK.

Got a little star in the fam.

Yeah -- did it actually hit
the fence, did it?

[short whimper] -- whoo-hoo!
whoo-hoo, whoo-hoo!

g*dd*mn!

It means a lot to me
to have been at my game,

'cause she hasn't been
to one in, like, a year,

so I've improved a lot.

Like, I'm at top-notch
right now.

So what's new with you?

What have I been missing
out on?

Me and Colin just looked
at our first wedding venue.

It was beautiful.

-A little bit
too bougie, too glam.
-Oh my God...

They had 260,000 crystals.

Baylen's my first kid
getting married,

and, as a mom,

I've poured my heart into her,
so a little part of me feels

like a tiny bit left-out.

Another reason why
it just really didn't work out

was I held my tics in

to the point when I got out,
my legs locked,

and I don't know
why I held them in

other than the fact that I was,
like, echoing

through the whole place.

Oh, well, that is, that's,
like, awkward, though,

that you felt it necessary
to be holding them in.

Honestly, it wouldn't hurt
to get back in to see Dana

and talk to her about some
of these concerns just to,

like, readdress with her.

Dana is Baylen's CBIT
therapist,

and CBIT is a technique

that Baylen uses
to manage her tics.

When you have that urge to say
an obscene word,

breathe in through your mouth
and out through your nose.

That sensation will go away.

-[Baylen] It's just hard
to like, get there.
-It's just hard.

I know that Baylen still meets
with Dana virtually,

but I also think it would be
smart for her to plan

an in-person session soon.

[Baylen]
That's a good idea.

I'm gonna schedule another
appointment with Dana.

f*ck Dana.

So speaking of therapy,
how are you feeling

about premarital counseling?

Well, me and Colin
are gonna do it.

-So...
-OK.

It hasn't started,
but, I mean,

I have high hopes
about it.

I feel this deep sense
of relief that they're going

to give premarital
counseling a try,

and I think that they'll be glad
that they did it.

-Ooh!
-That's all right!

-Way to hit the ball, guys!
-[Baylen] Bechnir's team lost?

[Julie]
Yep, they lost.

I'm so glad that you ride-shared
here and came to this.

I know it's not easy.

I know it means a ton to Bechnir

to have Baylen at his game.

The two of them are a lot alike
with their anxiety and

then certain behaviors

that Bechnir is starting
to exhibit.

Thank God he has baseball
right now because I think

baseball really keeps
his mind in a place

where he can put
some of that on the back burner.

-Come on, boo.
-You did so good!

Yeah, we did.
And I love your pink glove.

-I know, right?
-Did you like, hear her?

-[Bechnir] Yeah.
-You did?

[Baylen]
"Yeah, why wouldn't I?"

You heard her before
you saw her?

of course, that's our Bay-bay.

This is actually
our team mascot.

The Ticcer, that's me.
The Ticcer's here.

We should change our name.

What mascot would I even be?

Uh...
a mockingbird.

Ooh, I'd be a parrot,
I'd be a parrot.

Do you still want
to play baseball?

-$1-million-deal.
-No.

If I ever make it,
that's gonna be, like,

$90 million.
-OK, yeah, mm-hmm.

-Maybe if we make it
to the car...
-Yeah.

...we can make
the $90 million happen.

[Julie]
Let's get out of here!

Only $90?
That's not a lot of money.

[Julie] Bechs,
you're so full of yourself!

I love you, though.

Do you have anxiety
about therapy today?

I have a little bit
of anxiety --

therapy for the first time.

Baylen and I are headed to
premarital couples counseling.

We're going in there
completely blind.

So it's really hard for you
to express your emotions.

Does it feel kind
of overwhelming?

Yeah.

Yeah.

[upbeat music plays]

[Toot barks]

[Baylen]
What the heck, Toot?

Oh.

I'm taking my mom's advice,
and I'm meeting

with my CBIT therapist today.

I haven't seen Dana
in a while

because of the engagement,
moving.

Some things that help manage
my tics, other than CBIT,

are having headphones
on or listening to music...

being around my dogs.

However,
with my wedding coming up,

and not wanting
to say certain tics,

it's so important that I meet
with her to get the right tools

to not have those
tics happen.

-[knocking]
-[barking]

-Hi!
-How are you?

I'm good.

My name is Dana Wachter.

I'm a registered nurse
certified in CBIT therapy.

CBIT is an acronym
for Comprehensive Behavioral
Intervention for tics.

So, I love your apartment.

-It's beautiful.
-Thank you.

Thank you -- do you want to do
a walk-through?

That's your flair.
I would love to.

OK, sweet.
OK.

We have the bar stools
because the backs of the chairs,

like, set my tics off...
-[Dana] Mm-hmm.

...to, like, lean my head back.

So instead of having anything
there, it helps 'cause I can,

like, hold on to the things.
-Very good.

The stovetop is electric,
but I also...

learned that I need
a stove cover

because I don't want

to break the stovetop.
-Right.

We also have
plastic, everything.

Tic-proof.

Seeing Baylen's progress,
I am so proud because I always

reflect back
to our first meeting.

She was in tears.
She couldn't control her tics.

She was ashamed by them.
So she's come such a long way.

It's so rewarding to see.

So what did you want to work
on today?

I would like to work on...
d*ck.

[short whimper] --
my, um...

g*dd*mn!
Yeah.

-My g*dd*mn.
-On your g*dd*mn d*ck.

-g*dd*mn!
-Yes, absolutely.

I've had my...

g*dd*mn!

...tic for a long time,

but I don't really know
what set it off.

It's either from a movie
or something that someone said.

But I -- g*dd*mn --
definitely don't want to say it

on my wedding day, so...

So typically,
we would recommend using

a competing response
whenever an urge comes on.

We'll review
your reverse breathing

when you breathe in
through your mouth

and you hold it

and then you breathe out
through your nose

and the reason why
you're reverse breathing

is you're fighting
with speaking --

by breathing in through
your mouth,

it makes it impossible.

[deep breath]

-How do you feel?
-Like I didn't need
to say my tic.

-Beautiful.
-[Baylen] Mm-hmm.

Now, sometimes what happens
is, if you're speaking...

-sh*t.
-...and you feel an urge to have
a vocalization,

to stop and do
a competing response

interrupts the natural flow
of speech, right?

So, it's OK to do a less
intense version of the tic,

such as whispering the tic.

Like, I can do it without
saying it, but just make...

-Like...
-Exactly.

Or you can camouflage it as
a yawn, if you want.

That's awesome.
I never thought about that.

Yeah.

I practice my CBIT exercises
pretty much every day,

but it's a lot to do,
deep breathing or masking...

[short whimpers]

...for every tic.

And there will be times
where I do hold in my tics

when I feel uncomfortable.

So me and Colin went to look
at a wedding venue.

It was completely indoor,
and I was just echoing.

And I also did suppress
to the point where, when we left

the wedding tour, my legs were
locked up from, like,

motor tics.
-Yeah.

from almost, like,
holding in all my vocal...

From hearing the echoing.

Remember, we also want
to eliminate triggers.

Maybe go look at venues
that are outdoors...
-Mm-hmm.

...so you won't have that
feeling of, you know --

Being like, trapped almost.
-Yeah...

just like a claustrophobic
maybe, type feeling.
-[Baylen] Yes.

Where that would be eliminated
if you were outdoors.

-I'm excited to look into that.
-And remember...

you have your CBIT therapy
in your back pocket.

-Yes.
-You can use those competing
responses as you see fit.

Whatever feels comfortable
for you at the time.

Yeah.

Thank you for coming all
this way.

-You're welcome.
-Thank you so much.

You've come so far,
I want you to focus on that.

You live on your own now.

-Yay!
-That was big for you,
so I'm so proud of you.

Keep up the good work.

-Thank you.
-Mm-hmm.

Sometimes the CBIT sessions
with Dana can be difficult

if my tics are bad.

Today's went well,
but I would like to do more

as the wedding gets closer

so I can be
the best version of myself

on my big day.

[inspiring electronic
music plays]

Hey.

-How are you?
-[Baylen] I'm good.

How was work?

It was good.

I just got off work,
and Baylen and I are headed

to premarital couples
counseling.

Yay!

I'm going from one therapy
session to the next.

I have my CBIT session
with Dana today.

-How'd that go?
-[Baylen] It went well.

One thing that Dana reminded me
of is that CBIT

is all about removing triggers.

And I remember when we went
to the wedding venue,

it was kind of like,
setting my tics off

or making me feel like I had
to suppress in a way.

-Mm-hmm.
-Now that we know
that it's a trigger,

I would just not like

to see any more indoor venues.
-Yeah, no, I get it.

I think an outdoor venue
would probably fit.

[Colin] Finding
the perfect wedding venue

is like a moving target...

-Pew, pew, pew.
-...trying to avoid the triggers
of thunderstorms...

I have a g*n.

...by looking at an indoor
wedding venue only created

more triggers
that we were unaware of.

So I know that we both filled
out the assessment form,

what do you think is gonna be
something that we should

probably focus on?
-There were so many questions --

do you remember any of them?
-I know the questions.

There's a lot.

So the therapist sent over
an assessment for us

to complete before we got there.

[Baylen]
There was a lot of questions.

There was like
a hundred questions.

I know there was a lot
of sex questions.

OK.

-There was.
-I remembered.

That's the only thing
I remember.

I don't know how
they were worded.

I just remember it was like
one after the other.

Literally.

Literally -- kind of both.

-Both.
-Kind of both.

"Does your partner not
please you?"

Or, like, "Do you not please
your partner?"

"Is there ever times that...

one person's more pleased than
the other and you're upset?"

Just, like, any type of
specific question like that...

was on there.

[together]
No.

Why'd you say it like that?

[giggling] Because I'm nervous.
I don't like talking about it.

[car horn honking]

This guy can suck
a whole bag of dicks.

Suck a whole bag of dicks.

-Colin!
-Sorry.

Suck a whole bag of dicks.

Suck a whole bag of dicks.

And that's how tics start,
ladies and gentlemen,

right there.
Right there.

-Suck a whole bag of dicks.
-I'm sorry.

-Suck a whole --
-Dude's honking at --

[shouting]
Suck a whole bag of dicks!

I know you're watching.
Suck a whole bag of dicks.

[Baylen sighs] -- f*ck!

Just don't say anything else.
Suck a whole bag of dicks.

[Colin]
I got it.

Should we bring this up
in therapy?

Do you have anxiety
about therapy today?

Do I have anxiety?

Yeah, I have a little bit
of anxiety for therapy

for the first time.
Are you not?

-No.
-OK, good for you.

-I'm super nervous right now.
-All right, we're here.

Let the therapy begin.

[Baylen]
Allen's bald.

We're going in there
completely blind.

Like, we have no idea.

-Hello.
-Hi, Baylen.

-Your room is so nice.
-Thank you --

it's so nice to meet you.
-Can I give you a hug?

Yes -- [indistinct] --
it's so nice to meet you.

-Hi, Colin.
Are you a hugger too?
-Hi.

Nice to meet you.
Sit wherever you'd like.

My name is Amy Begnal.

I am a licensed
professional counselor.

I've been practicing
for the last 11 years,

specializing with couples
for the last eight years.

How does it feel to be
here today?

I was a little nervous before
getting here.

Just therapy scares me.
-OK.

My parents came to him and I

and said that they did
premarital counseling,

basically kind of as,

like, an avenue to grow
the relationship together,

so any way to just make

our marriage as strong
as possible.
-Yeah,

that's a really good --
-f*cking, b*tch.

[Amy]
I've never had a client
with Tourette syndrome.

What I know about
Tourette syndrome is that it is

a neurological disorder,
so Baylen and Colin might have

a little more of a challenge
than your typical couple,

but I'm really grateful
for the opportunity to sit

and establish a safe space
for Baylen and Colin

to be able to open up

so that they can share
really vulnerable pieces

of their relationship.

So before you came here today,
I sent you an assessment

to complete,
a premarital assessment,

that was able to highlight
your strengths

as well as some growth areas,

and I'm just curious,
what were some areas

of strength that really
popped out for you?

Do you recall?

It's definitely not
communication.

Definitely not communication.

It's definitely not
communication.

OK, you seem pretty
confident in that, tell me more.

Yes, 'cause I'm very bad
at communicating.

OK.
Tell me more.

Like everything,
like everything that I can be --

like, I don't know how to,
like, express my feelings.

And then
I also struggle with, like,

everything to do with vocally,
like, sh --

everything, so...

Does it feel
kind of overwhelming?

-Yeah.
-[Amy] OK.

-Yeah, and stressful.
-How frequently do you feel...

overwhelmed?

[Amy] OK.

[Amy]
Yeah.

[Amy]
Yeah.

Is this bringing up
some emotion for you?

-Yeah.
-[Amy] OK.

Yeah.

I mean, I was on board
for therapy, of course I was,

but I wasn't expecting to be in
puddle of tears in five minutes

but I guess that's
what therapists are for,

is to actually say something.

[Amy]
How about you, Colin?

Did anything come up for you
that you thought would be

important to bring up together?
-Um...

I think...

I don't know.
Like, I guess, like...

I've been holding on
to something for a while now,

and it's not easy to say
out loud,

because I know
it's gonna affect Baylen.

It's something that's been
a burden and I can't keep

pretending that it's not.

[Baylen]
I am having a girls' night.

[cheering]

Girls' night with a twist.

Twist that d*ck around,

wrap it, slap it, tap it,
that d*ck.

Holy sh*t,
I look like Bechnir.

[laughing]

This is the first time
that I've had a solid,

tight group of girlfriends.

It's great.

Here soon, I have to make,
like, a career decision.

That is a super heavy burden

that I guess I could say
that I have.

So what's Colin's plan after
he gets out of the military?

He doesn't honestly know.

Because he knows
you can't work a normal job?

I think there is some tension
between my siblings and Colin

because my siblings are very,
very protective of me.

Baylen, I want to show
you something

that we got outside, OK?

My dad's been bugging me
to come by the house to see

something, and I have no idea
what it is.

-What are you doing?
-[Baylen] Yeah, what are
we doing?

No, I'm being serious.