02x20 - Birdman

[bunniefuu]

[ Up-tempo music plays ]
good morning!

Good morning.

Good morning.

[ Roars ]

Good morning.

Good morning!

Hey,
uncle grandpa.

Want to see something
really cool?

If it's those devil sticks
again, then no.

Right now
I'm helping pizza steve

Catch some sick air
on his new kite board.

What?

[ Metal music plays ]
whoo! Yeah! Whoo!

Power slide!

Get off
my property!

Isn't that
a little too dangerous?

That's exactly what I said,
but pizza steve informed me

That his middle name
is "too dangerous,"

Which came
as a total shock

'Cause I always thought pizza
steve's middle name was walter.

What the -- oh no!

Heeeelp!

Aaaahhh!

[ Panting ]
pth!

Ugh.

Aaaaaaaah!

Pizza steve,
I'm so sorry!

If only mr. Gus
hadn't distracted me

With those
lame devil sticks.

My... Shades.

Ow.

My shades
are ruined.

Nooooo!
[ Groans ]

[ Grunts ]

I'm sure he'll be fine,
uncle grandpa.

But I think we better fix
that hole on the roof

Before something
gets in the rv,

Like a squirrel
or a mou--

Not now,
mr. Gus!

Can't you see
we have an emergency?

Pizza steve's cool-dude specs
are ruined.

[ Crying ]
owww.

Hang in there,
little buddy.

Well, time for another solo sess
of devil sticking.

Okay, done -- your brand-new
cool-dude shades, pizza steve.

Now you can go back
to ignoring people

By not having
to make eye contact.

Ohhh.

Can you bring them closer,
uncle g?

Anything for my handsome,
little munchkin.

[ Glass shatters ]
ooh.

Cute, little baby.
[ Smooches ]

Here. Tell me what you think
of these bad boys.

Hmm. The tint
has a nice gradient.

Tipping angle
is a bit misaligned.

Could use
a little more 'tude power...

Ohhhhh.

Yeah,
I guess they'll do.

Oh, pizza steve,
you've made me so happy.

Oh, thank you,
thank you, thank you, thank you.

Okay, uncle g,
you're welcome.

But I still need
my recovery space.

Anything for my main squeeze,
pizza squeeve.

[ Scratching ]
w-w-what's that sound?

Mr. Gus. Mr. Gus.

You're the sassy smart one
in the group.

Where's that mildly irritating
scratching noise coming from?

Told you to fix
that hole in the roof.

Now there's probably something
living in our attic.

We have
an attic?

It's really dark up here.

Try feeling around
for a light switch.

Okay,
but I don't know.

Doesn't seem like there's
anything... Around here.

Hmm. These feel
kind of weird.

Oh!
Hello, harold.

Do you know where I could find
a light around here?

Wow!
Thanks, little fella.

And here's
your reward.

[ Smooches ]

Now to get to the bottom
of that scratching sound.

Hmm.

Just a bunch
of worthless junk.

I'm not seeing
any scratching action, guys.

Huh?
Yeah, buddy.

Nothin' to it
but to do it.

Lightweight, baby.

There's a giant bird
up here

Working out
and getting totally ripped.

Wait -- did you just say
a giant bird getting ripped?

That's right.

Looks like he's focusing
on traps and lats today.

Nothin' to it
but to do it.

Yup yup.
Traps and lats?

Whoo-hoo! Yeah.
This is worse
than I thought.

Birdman: yeah, buddy!
You know what this means,
fellas?

Birdman has come to roost
in our rv.

Birdman?

Every 500 years,
birdman circles the world

In search of a convenient place
to perch.

Once he's chosen
his roosting nest,

He forces his way into the home

And makes himself
as comfortable as possible

For as long as he wants.

I can't believe we're
talking about some lame bird

When pizza steve's shades
are ruined again.

Oh, dear.

Uncle g's gonna make it
all better.

Guys, wait up. What are we
gonna do about birdman?

I'm telling you,
he's trouble.

Ehh, lighten up,
mr. Gus.

I'm sure he won't affect
our lives at all whatsoever.

Birdman:
hoo! Yeah, buddy!

Lightweight, baby.
Nothin' to it but to do it.

[ Rooster crows ]

Yeah, buddy! Hoo!

[ Snoring ]

Huh?

Hey, who poked holes
in my pizza box?

Pizza steve can't stay fresh
with a busted roof.

Huh?

This will not fly.

[ Grumbling ]

Can you
believe this?

Somebody ate
my pizza bed

And ruined yet another pair
of my shades!

I told
you he was trouble.

That birdbrain
used my exercise gear

And didn't even towel off
the seat afterwards.

So I've written him
a strongly worded note.

"Hey, guys!

Please wipe down
after a good sweat.

I'm not mad, just want
to keep a tidy, organized house!

Ha ha!
Thanks -- mg."

Forget leaving notes.

Birdman has got to go.

Where's uncle g?

[ Roars ]

Uncle grandpa! How're we
going to get through that?

[ Roars ]

Don't worry about it,
genius.

I've got
just the doohickey.

Uh-oh.

Ahhhhh!
Yaaaaaah!

Mr. Gus: well,
we can spend all day

Debating the finer points,
pizza steve,

But I think
we can both agree

That our tv should never be used
as a punching bag.

I agree.

[ Weakly ]
birdman must go.

So, buddy g*ng,
who's gonna ask him to leave?

All:
one, two, three!

Monster truck
beats scissors

And monster truck
beats pizza steve's fist.

So...
Dinosaur does it.

What?!
All right.

I guess I'll have to talk
to this guy bird to bird.

[ Metal music plays ]
hoo! Yeah, buddy!

[ Music stops ]

Fear me.

[ Metal music resumes ]
yeah, buddy!

Oooh! Yeah.
Get pumped!

Whoo!
Yep yep.

So,
how'd it go?

[ Sniffles ]

Your turn,
pizza steve.

[ Snores ]

Lightweight, baby.

Come on,
take the bait.

Take it, you bird.

Ugh!
[ Metal music plays ]

Ow! Ow! Oh! Ah! Ow!

Frelp, bly tribed.
[Well, I tried.]

There's got to be a way
to get rid of this birdman!

Well, he's really into
the large-muscle lifestyle.

You have any more
of that protein powder you used

Back in the '70s?

Good idea,
mr. Gus.

[ Pop! ]

Bing!
Highly potent protein powder.

No birdman can resis-- uh?!

Hoo!
Lightweight, baby.

Bawk, bawk.

Whoo!
Yeah, buddy! Mmm.

[ Engine turns over,
tires squeal ]

Now to fix that hole
so birdman can't come back

And take care of this egg
right here. Egg?!

Aw, shucks.

We can't evict
an expecting parent.

Why not?

Because, pizza steve, that would
be "not a nice thing to do."

So what do we do?

We evict the egg,
too.

Okay,
little eggie.

I don't care where you go stay,
but you can't stay here.

Birdman: nothin' to it
but to do it.

[ Metal music plays ]
lightweight, baby!

Hoo! Yeah!
Yup yup!

Birdman's back.

Let's get pumped!

We should've never given him

All that protein powder
from the '70s.

I think
he's gonna charge us, guys.

We need
a distraction.

All:
one, two, three!

Fist mr. Gus means...

[ As mr. Gus ]
it's up to you, buddy.

[ Normal voice ]
come on, pizza steve.
Uh...

Let's get pumped!!

Whoo-hoo-wee!

Yaaaaaah!

Oh, ain't nothin
but a peanut!

At least somebody appreciates
my devil sticking.

Okay, guys, whatever
you're doing, do it fast.

I don't know how much longer
I can hold him off.

Where do we move
birdman's egg?

It's got to be somewhere
that birds like, like the sky.

That's it --
we'll send it to the clouds.

I know exactly how you're
gonna help me do it, buddy.

Oh, no.

If you think
I'm carrying that egg

Up to the clouds
on my kite-board,

You're beyond cray-cray.

Actually, pizza steve,
I was gonna ask

If you could help load the egg
into the egg canon.

But your idea's better.
Ready?

Hop on, buddy.

Not after how you let me down
last time.

Ow.
The time for talk
is done.

Time for action.

Now take to the sky once again,
little flyer.

Oof.

[ Metal music plays ]
whoo! Yep yep.

We're airborne.

Lightweight, baby!
Uaah!

I'm doing it!

Let's get pumped!

Yeah, buddy!

Nothin' to it
but to do it.

I did it! Ah!

Ahhhh!

Don't worry,
pizza steve.

I won't
let you down.

Ooof.

See, pizza steve?
I saved your shades this time.

Great.

Bawk!

Hoo!
Lightweight, baby!

Yeah,
my little buddy.

You guys won't believe
what's back here.

Anyway, bye.

Ohhh. Aaaah. Uhhh.

[ Knock on door ]

Ah,
uncle grandpa.

So, says here
that this is your first visit

In over 5, 000 years.

Wow. [ Chuckles ]

That's wacky.
That's quacky?

Hey, let's get started
by checking your blood pressure.

Hoooooo.

Pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt.

I don't get it,
but let's move on.

Okay, let's have a listen
to those lungs.

[ Roaring ]

All rigthy,
let's try the heart instead.

[ Metal music plays ]

Okay, let's look
at your eyes, then.

No...

Nope, nope, nope.

Noooooooooooo.

No.

This is silly.
[ Whimpering ]

All right,
none of that.

I guess
I'll check your reflexes.

Tell me
if this hurts.

I've seen enough.

Ohhh. Aaaah. Uhhh.

Just give it
to me straight, doc!

How long
have I got?

[ Sobbing ]

In all my years
in this profession,

I have never seen anyone
so... So weird!

[ Gasps ]

It's awesome.
So I'm healthy?

Oh, I don't know.
Probably not.

I'm a duck-tor,
not a doc-tor.

That's good enough
for me.

[ Funky music plays ]

That was quite delicious.