03x18 - All the Players Came

[bunniefuu]

Remember when we owned the shop?

Remember when we owned the shop?

Many years ago.

Whazzup?

Mr. Jim, how you doing?

Hey, tommy.

You got the best hand, big boy.

Martin, you remember mr. Mackey?

Mr. Mackey who owns the mackey theater?

Oh!

Hey!

He is i, and I is he.

You own the theater, right?

That's where I learned the meaning of bump and grind.

That's the first place I saw the rear on pam grier.

How are you seeing something?

You're blind.

He got you on that.

I'm so glad you enjoyed the theater.

I'm inviting you down for the closing show tonight.

Whoa!

What you mean, closing show?

I took out a loan to remodel,

Got behind on the payments.

Now the man is putting me out.

Sorry to hear that.

No pity now. Just have your asses down there and help me tonight.

We down with you. We there.

Oh, man.

Y'all see the man, how sad he looked.

I almost saw a tear.

We can't let him go out like that.

That's where we saw all the old seventies flicks.

Remember blackula...

The return of blackula...

The bride of blackula...

All of them, man.

Back in the seventies, they had real movie stars.

I'm the first one to comb isaac hayes' beard.

Bet you broke many a pick, too, didn't you?

Captioning made possible by warner bros.

♪ Lawrence ♪♪

We're going in three minutes,

Ahh, yeah, yeah...

All right, y'all,

What's everybody looking so sad for?

We got to see black caesar, foxy brown,

And sparklefor $.

I'm kind of feeling sorry for mr. Mackey, you know.

Don't worry. He'll be all right.

I know he'll be all right.

I got a plan to save the theater.

I'm organizing a fund raiser.

Go ahead, dog.

Like lou rawls.

No, baby, in martin's case that's lou smalls.

She's something, ain't she.

I wasn't even talking to you, scary j. Bligh.

I'm goin' down till you ain't around.

Come on over here. Let me talk to y'all.

I'll tell you what's happening.

Would you join us, hershey bar?

Check it out.

All right, now, peep this.

Are you with me?

I'm gonna throw a player's ball down at nipsey's.

It's gonna honor the people who paved the way for us.

Who are you gonna get?

Cool. Cool. You asked me that.

You might know him. Antonio fargas.

Huggy. Huggy.

Let's see, uh, we got rudy ray moore.

Dolamite.

Yep. Yep. Yep.

And, uh, for the fellas, pam grier.

Give it up.

And whoever else stops by.

What do you want us to do, then?

Ah, baby, damn.

Y'all pose a dilemma when you ask me that.

Hey, guys.

Baby, you cool. You ain't got to do much.

Cole, tommy, what I'm gonna need y'all to do,

Is get some volunteers from the neighborhood,

To help us decorate the place.

I want it to look player's style.

O.k., Pam.

As bad as you talk to me, I ain't helpin' you with jack.

I was just gonna see if you could get cujo down here.

Just go over there.

Yeah. You know what I'm sayin'?

I heard everybody and they mama gonna be at the ball.

This benefit is bringin' all the players out.

You know, back in the day,

Gettin' ready to go out was an event in itself.

That's right. Ain't that right, bro?

You ain't said nothin', baby.

Y'all forced me to come out of retirement.

I wonder who my competition will be.

It won't be nobody up in here.

Oh! Oh!

Jerome's in the house.

I said jerome's in the house.

Watch your mouth.

What's happenin'?

I came down here to get my little ya-ya...

I saw you down in the little road,

That little girl was something else.

I'm gonna try to get with that

As soon as I get a chance.

What's happenin'? The player of the year

Is in it to win it.

I'm gonna take the crown.

In just about a minute.

You better get out of here with that

Fake-a*s bootsy collins process.

Fake?

Let me tell you something.

You're fake and a fraud, and part-time broad.

Look, you jive-time turkey.

Are you challenging me...me, for player of the year?

Let me tell you something.

I'm the mayor of debonair.

And I'm about to be player...

Extraordinaire.

So there.

You ain't said nothing but a word, chump.

I see you ain't got no new lines... Huggy.

And I can see you ain't got no new teefus neither...

Yuck mouth.

Yuck mouth.

That's the second time somebody's called me yuck mouth.

Damn it, the dentist messed up my teeth.

I'm going to get my teeth fixed.

I'll see you at the player's ball.

That's all!

♪ Yeah, uh, yeah ♪

♪ You need to get up, get out and get something ♪

♪ Don't let the days of your life pass by ♪

♪ You need to get up, get out and get something ♪

♪ Don't spend all your time tryin' to get fly ♪

♪ People, you need to get up, get out and get something ♪

♪ How you gonna make it if you never even try ♪♪

Y'all bad, man. Y'all bad, man.

O.k.!

O.k.!

Whoo!

We're gonna be back in just one second.

Keep everything goin'.

Oh, coolio, what's happenin'?

Welcome, man. Welcome.

I just thought I'd slide...

Slide...

Slippity slide on down and check out the player's ball.

Take a fantastic voyage to your seat.

Welcome, ladies.

All right.

Baby.

Look at all these people.

It's the player's ball. It's a player's thing.

Oh, my goodness. Oh, man...

Oh, my goodness!

Martin, man, I don't know how to thank you.

I never thought that this many folk

Would show up for the old theater.

I told you it would work.

We gonna keep the show going,

So let's get you to your seat.

So you can enjoy that.

Cole, there's pam.

Man, I seen pam already.

She rode up here with us.

Where was you at?

I'm not talking about pam. I'm talkin' 'bout pam grier.

Foxy brown,dog.

Where do the judges sit?

Uh...right this way.

You know, I've been a fan of yours for a long time.

You know that, don't you?

I wish willona from good timeswas here.

I remember when I used to have a crush on her.

Excuse me, handsome. Would you show me my seat?

There's your seat, right there.

Never mind, honey. I'll find it myself.

Oh, ja'net, come on, girl. You know I was just jivin' you.

I hope you have a good time.

Look, we're gonna keep the show rollin'.

Please, keep it goin, detroit.

A big round of applause for your emcee...

d*ck anthony williams.

But you know him as pretty tony.

Now, you all know the rules.

You all know the rules. Everything is everything.

So, let's come on, with the come on.

Get down with the get down.

Now, I'd like to introduce you to our players.

The first contestant tonight...

Is mr. Dolamite himself...

Rudy ray moore. Give it up. Give it up.

Love...peace...

And hair grease, y'all.

All right, now,

Our next player is known as huggy bear...

Give it up for antonio fargas.

Andog in the house!

Andog's in the house!

Andog's in the house! Andiggity dog's in the house!

In your mouth!

Hold up! Hold up! Wait a minute!

Stop it!

Now, that's just wrong.

How y'all gonna let him steal my song?

Everybody knows I'm the original player.

From the himalayas.

Now!

Since me and you can't get along...

Let's get it on!

Our first competition for tonight...

Is best player's call.

Players!

Let's hear you call!

Yes, I'm dolamite.

Fine and uptight and outasite.

Yes, I'm divine...

And guaranteed to blow your mind.

And I ain't lyin', baby.

Hey, chicky baby, chicky baby.

[Making bird sounds]

Boo! Boo! Boo!

Hey, girl!

You know what to do.

Bring it on home.

Suky, suky, suky, sue!

Y'all want to hear my player call?

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

I said, do you wanna hear the player call?

Yeah!yeah! Yeah!yeah!

[Boop beep beep boop]

What's happenin'?

Can I speak to sonya?

What's happenin'?

What's the matter?

You can't call nobody?

I want you to get ready for the player

With the coolest player strut.

[Clears throat]

Listen, since you don't recognize a real player...

Why don't you strut your stuff off stage?

Boy, you better shut your mouth

When you hear grown folks talkin'.

Now, sit down.

I want you to get ready for the talent portion of our show.

♪♪♪

Thank you, baby.

Trixie...

Who's the man?

You is. You the man.

And baby, who's player of the year?

You is, catdaddy antonio.

I want to dedicate this song...

To a special lady in my life...

Pammy...

Oh, you are so sweet, jerome.

Not you...

I'm talking about sheba baby.

This one goes out to you, girl.

For all my years, fears, and my tears.

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪



♪ Ah, well, yeah, girl, sho' you right ♪

♪ Girl, I'm ♪

♪ Spinnin' my dime, wastin' my time ♪

♪ Talkin' till I'm black and blue ♪

♪ Can't you see ♪

♪ I want to get next to you ♪

♪ Kick the car door ♪

♪ Baby, I'll step down to ya ♪

♪ You can't break me, mold me, hold me ♪

♪ Whatever it takes to get you ♪

O.k., Hey! Hey, y'all!

Hey! Hey!

That's my baby, y'all.

That's my baby!

O.k., We have our two finalists.

Finalist number one.

Antonio fargas.

And finalist number two.

Jerome.

All right. Whoever gives the best response

To this next question...

Will be player of the year.

Antonio...

What would you do to change the world?

Well, since this world is mine...

I wouldn't change nothing.

You see, y'all are just some squirrels up in the trees,

Trying to get these chestnuts.

Jerome, same question.

You ain't got to get sarcastic.

Why you want to--

Don't start with me.

O.k. Apologies to you.

Let me think for a second.

Yeah, right, right. O.k.

If this world were mine...

All cadillacs would be feet long.

With a diamond in the back.

Sunroof top.

Diggin' the scene with the gangster lean.

Whoo-hoo!

O.k., Everybody!

We want you to know this little gala

Has raised enough money to save the mackey theater!

Oh, wow. Hey, hey, y'all.

I mean, I can't thank you enough.

And the next time you're at the mackey theater...

If you order yourself some popcorn,

The butter's on me.

Well, you're all players to us.

But tonight, there can only be one player of the year.

And he is...

[Drum roll]

Jerome!

Got to give it to you, romie.

You're a true player.

But I gots to give it to you, antonio.

You is a true player, yourself.

Now give me pound on the side that's brown.

Now, see you around town.

Hold it! Hold it!

This party is not over!

Let's put our hands together one more time...

For outkast!

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ One, two, one, two ♪

♪ One, two, one, two ♪

♪ Yeah, we gonna do this thing ♪

♪ Yeah, you know what I'm sayin' ♪

♪ Yeah, uh, uh ♪

♪ So, while I begin to piece my... ♪♪

♪...from far and wide ♪

♪ Now, check it out, with all the afros and braids ♪

♪ Kickin' them gangster rides ♪

♪ Now, I'm here to tell y'all ♪

♪ That there's a better day ♪

♪ Let me hear you, when the player's ball is happenin'... ♪♪