[ Up-tempo music plays ]
Uncle grandpa: good morning!
Good morning.
Good morning.
Grft: [ roars ]
Uncle grandpa: good morning.
Good morning!
Hey, lisa, my mom, like,
Packed us sodas.
Do you, like, want one?
Like, okay.
Two sodas, like, coming
Right up or whatever.
Here.
Thanks.
Hmm.
[ Grunting ]
[ Sighs ]
Like, how are we supposed to
Drink soda when it's, like,
Trapped inside these weird glass
Thingies?
[ Groaning ]
I don't know, but this is,
Like, totally all the
Government's fault, probably.
[ Groans ]
I am sooo upset right now.
I know!
Me too!
Life is so hard sometimes,
Stacey!
[ Rumbling ]
Both: huh?
Uncle grandpa: well, maybe I
Can help!
Both: uncle grandpa!
Uncle grandpa: yeah, it's
Me.
And let's not forget my
Associates -- big bad belly bag,
Mr. Gus,
Giant realistic flying tiger,
And pizza steve.
Pizza steve: uncle g, do you
Mind?
I kind of have a big boss on my
Hands here.
Both: hi, pizza steve!
Pizza steve: wait. What?
[ Both giggle ]
Pizza steve: aye chi-wa-wow.
Uncle grandpa: all right!
It's time to open up those soda
Bottles!
Both: yay!
Pizza steve: wait! Uncle g!
Uh...you got to let pizza steve
Handle this one.
Uncle grandpa: I don't know.
This is a tough job.
Are you sure, pizza steve?
Mr. Gus: he could hurt
Himself, uncle grandpa.
Pizza steve: zip it,
Dino bones!
Pizza steve's got this!
Have no fear!
Pizza steve is here!
And, ladies, your problems are
Over!
Oh, yeah!
Let's do this!
Br-r-r-rup! Br-r-r-rup!
Bup! Bup!
Let the soda party begin!
[ Grunting ]
Almost...
There!
Aah!
Nyaaaah!
Hey!
What the --
Wait. What?
Unh!
Mr. Gus: one for you.
And one for you.
You okay, lil' cheese?
Ha ha!
Lil' cheese!
[ Spits ]
[ Both laugh ]
Mr. Gus: lil' cheese?
Pizza steve: mr. Gus,
youare
A --
Big strong dinosaur man!
You're, like, totally our hero!
Come hang out with us!
Pizza steve: [ sighs ]
And so, in light of the soda-pop
Incident at the beach, I have
Come to the conclusion that
Mr. Gus is superior to
Pizza steve in every which way
Possible.
Whoa!
Uncle grandpa: hey,
Pizza steve!
What you doing?
Pizza steve: dah!
[ Stammering ]
N-n-nothing.
Why? What's up?
Uncle grandpa: want to go dig
A hole?
Normally I would love to,
Uncle g, but I can't right now
Because i, uh -- uh...
Uncle grandpa: because you're
Writing in your diary?
Pizza steve: aah!
Nope. That's not my diary.
Uncle grandpa: it's not?
Pizza steve: no!
It's "peter pan," bro.
Uncle grandpa: oh!
I love that story!
Sorry for the interruption.
Pizza steve: no problemo.
Whew!
[ expl*si*n, rumbling ]
Whoa!
Uncle grandpa: pizza steve!
I hit a gas line!
I need your help!
Pizza steve: aw, come on,
Man!
[ Grunts ]
[ Watching beeping ]
Mr. Gus: uh-oh! 9:00.
It's bath/reading time!
Hmm?
"Peter pan"?
I love this story!
Bath time's about to get a whole
Lot more fun thanks to
Tinkerbell and friends.
Pizza steve: [ coughs ]
Uncle grandpa: thanks,
Pizza steve!
Pizza steve: now to finish
Writing about how pathetic I am
In my diary that I left right
Here.
Aaaah!
Mr. Gus! Mr. Gus!
Mr. Gus! Wait!
Mr. Gus: pizza steve, you
Know dang well that my allotted
Bathroom time begins at 9:00.
Pizza steve: I know, bro!
But -- but -- but you took my
Book!
Mr. Gus: upon completion of
My bubble bath, I shall
Relinquish the book.
But until then, I'm gonna soak
In the tub and escape to
J.m. Barrie's enchanting world
Of neverland.
Pizza steve: but, mr. Gus --
[ Thinking ] oh, no!
Mr. Gus has my secret diary!
He's gonna know all of
Pizza steve's most embarrassing
Secrets!
I'd better hatch a plan, quick.
[ Soft jazz music plays ]
Mr. Gus: mmm-hmm!
Time to get the party started!
Man, I'm so excited!
But before I begin, I'm just
Gonna admire the cover for a
Few minutes.
Mmm. Yeah.
Sleep...mode.
Pizza steve: [clears throat]
It's gonna take a tiny miracle
To bust down the bathroom door
And distract mr. Gus so
Pizza steve can get his secret
Diary back!
Did somebody say tiny m--
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I did!
Come on! Move it! Let's go!
Mr. Gus: and now to open the
Cover.
Huh? What the --
♪ Tiny miracle
♪ The robot boy
Mr. Gus: tiny miracle?
What in heaven's name --
Look at me!
Mr. Gus: get back here!
What the heck do you think
You're doing?
Creating a diversion.
Mr. Gus: diversion?
From what?
Pizza steve!
Thanks for picking that up for
Me.
Pizza steve: ohh! Unh!
[ Hammering ]
Mr. Gus: that ought to do the
Trick.
Ahh!
Sorry to keep you waiting,
Peter pan.
Uh...
Wait. Where my glasses at?
Pizza steve: they should've
Called me pizza smooth!
Uncle grandpa: uncle grandpa
Smash!
[ Grunts ]
Yes!
Pizza steve: hey, uncle g,
Sorry to interrupt, but can you
Smash these into a million
Pieces for me?
Uncle grandpa: absolutely,
Pizza steve.
Hey, wait a minute.
These look like mr. Gus'
Reading glasses.
No, these things were sent
Here from another dimension.
They're pure evil.
Uncle grandpa: yikes!
There's no time to lose, then!
[ Spits ]
All right, here we go.
[ Rumbling ]
Mr. Gus: [ roaring ]
Uncle grandpa: dang it.
I lost count.
Mr. Gus: pizza steve!
Give me back my glasses right
Now!
Uncle grandpa: but,
Pizza steve, you said --
Pizza steve: never mind what
I said!
Give me that hammer!
[ Grunting ]
Mr. Gus: hmph!
[ Sighs ]
Uncle grandpa, can you do me a
Favor and keep pizza steve out
Of trouble for one hour?
Uncle grandpa: sure thing,
Mr. Gus.
Mr. Gus: thanks.
Don't let him leave this spot
Now!
Uncle grandpa: you have my
Word.
Pizza steve: hey, uncle g,
I'm gonna go drive the rv.
Uncle grandpa: have fun,
Pizza steve.
Pizza steve: later, bro.
Fun fact!
You can't take a bath without
Water.
[ Tires screeching ]
Mr. Gus: aaah!
[ Grunting ]
Pizza steve: looks like
Bath time's up.
Mr. Gus: no.
I'm still taking my bath, and
I'm still gonna read
"Peter pan."
And it's happening this time.
'Cause you're gonna be locked in
Here until I'm done.
Pizza steve: but, mr. Gus,
You can't read that book!
Mr. Gus!
Mr. Gus!
Mr. Gus: [ humming ]
Pizza steve: oh, this is not
Good!
Mr. Gus is gonna read all of
Pizza steve's most embarrassing
Secrets!
All of pizza steve's most
Intimate inner thoughts!
There's got to be at least 100
Pages in that diary where
Pizza steve admits that he
Wishes he could be more like
Mr. Gus!
Aaaaaaaaah!
[ Lock clicks ]
Mr. Gus: I'm done with my
Bubble bath.
Pizza steve, about your book...
Pizza steve: save your
Breath, mr. Gus.
There's no need to mock me!
Now that you know everything
About me -- all the sleepless
Nights where I fantasized about
Being a muscle man like you!
Pizza steve's got nothing on
Mr. Gus and his "strapping,
Green physique!"
Could you believe the hundred
Pages where I admitted that all
My girlfriends I ever had in my
Entire life were totally
Imaginary?
And how about the entry where I
Admitted that the real reason I
Wear these cool-guy shades is to
Hide the constant flow of
Tears?!
You know it all now!
Pizza steve's a total train
Wreck.
Mr. Gus: if it makes you
Feel any better, I didn't
Actually read a single world of
This thing.
Pizza steve: huh?
Say what?
Mr. Gus: your desperate
Antics soaked it, cover to
Cover.
And let me tell you, there's no
Way anyone could read a book
With ink thissmeared.
Pizza steve: [ grunts ]
Hey, mr. Gus?
Mr. Gus: yeah?
Pizza steve: you know all
That stuff I just told you about
My diary?
Mr. Gus: uh-huh.
Pizza steve: well, I was...
Just kidding!
L-l-l-later, bros!
Uncle grandpa: hi!
Uncle grandpa here, and I'm
About to show you an amazing new
Product that will revolutionize
The way you live.
Introducing squirrel sweaters!
The only solution for your cold
Squirrels.
Your squirrel wants to go
Outside, but it's too cold!
And your other squirrel wants to
Go inside, but it's also too
Cold!
But with squirrel sweaters,
Mother nature's icy chill seems
Bearable!
And say bye-bye to
Through-the-roof heating bills.
These sweaters pack all the heat
You'll need.
And there's even a sweater to
Fit every squirrel personality!
Formal, casual, business casual,
Holiday, tiger, '80s tv dad,
'90S teenager, see-through,
Sports fan, uncle grandpa fan,
Plus size, and pink.
But that's not all!
Squirrel sweaters are also great
For absorbing spills, storing
Leftovers, ignoring calls,
Ziplining, target practice, even
Patching damaged interpersonal
Relationships.
[ Ting! ]
And if you order your
Squirrel sweater within the next
One but two possum ponchos,
To keep your possums dry in even
The wettest rain!
So order while supplies last!
Uncle grandpa is not
Responsible for the views or
Opinions of this particular
Product.
May cause cramping or intense
Nausea.
Any irritations to your skin
Please consult your physician
Immediately.
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01x45 - Pizza Steve's Diary
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Uncle Grandpa is a magical shapeshifting person that stops by children's houses every day to see how they are doing.
Uncle Grandpa is a magical shapeshifting person that stops by children's houses every day to see how they are doing.