03x10 - A Couple Calls for the Check but Doesn't Know the Hand Motion

[bunniefuu]

- [Sam] Tonight, one of
those black and white videos

of 1900s NYC, it's Josh Ruben.

[Sam chuckling]

A Broadway character's
first day in the big city,

it's Anna Garcia.

- Well, gee!

[Sam laughing]

Ah! Taxi!

Times Square!

I love it here! Rats!

- [Sam] And a melodramatic
teen coming home

after a first date, it's Hannah Pilkes.

[Sam laughing]

- Don't ask me how I am.
Don't ask me how I am.

Don't ask me how I am. [crying]

[Sam and crew laughing]

No one's ever gonna have sex with me!

- [Sam] They're all here to...

- [Players] Make some noise!

[cheerful music]

- Welcome to "Make Some Noise",

the game so good we spun it off unchanged.

I am your host, Sam Reich.
Here's how the show works.

I have here a series of
improvisational prompts

our players have never seen before.

Isn't that right, players?

- Who is that?
- [Josh] Wait a minute.

- What is it?
- They will,

to the best of their ability,
fulfill those prompts.

I will award them corresponding points,

and the winner will go home
with the coveted golden ear,

which can be unwrapped to
reveal a chocolate ear.

Players, are you ready to rumble?

- I'm ready to rumble.
- I am as well, Dad.

- We're ready, Father, to rumble.

- Ready to rumble.

- I'm thirsty.
- She's parched!

- Sister hasn't had a liquid in nights.

- I'm a human raisin.

- This is the craziest episode already.

- [Anna] You heard it here first, folks.

- Nickname our episode Squiggletown,

'cause we're about to get-
- Squiggly.

- They're all here to...

- Squiggly!
- Yeah, great.

First, a little warmup game.

This is a little minigame

we like to call Take Some Direction.

How it works is, players, I
will give you a line of dialogue

to repeat over and over and over again.

As you do, I will give you direction,

micro-adjustments, if you will,

to incorporate into your performance.

Josh, your line is,

we're going to need a bigger boat.

- Okay.

- No direction to get started, and action.

- We're going to need a bigger boat.

- Anna, give me a little bit more.

- We're going to need a bigger boat.

- Hannah, give me a little bit more.

- We're going to need a bigger boat.

- Josh, weirder.

- We're going to need a...

A bigger boat.

- That was weird!
- [Hannah] That was weird.

- Anna, like a cheer.

- We're gonna need [claps] a bigger boat!

- Nice high kick!
- Thank you.

- [Sam] Hannah, hanging on by a thread.

[Hannah chuckling darkly]

- We're going to... [chuckles]

We're going to need a bigger boat.

- Josh, like a pickup line
that isn't going to work.

- We, um...

[Sam and crew laughing]

We're gonna-

- Stop it! So much tongue!

- Ew. Get that in your mouth.

- We're going to need a bigger boat.

- Anna, like a pick-up
line that is going to work.

- I don't know about you, but...

We're going to need a bigger boat.

- Yeah, Josh, that's how it's done.

- It worked.

- Hannah, without letting
me lose sight of your teeth.

[Sam and crew laughing]

- We're going to need a bigger boat.

[Josh laughing]

- [Sam] Josh, like an
alien trying to blend in.

[Josh groans bizarrely]
[Everyone laughing]

- We're going to need

[Sam and crew laughing]

a bigger boat.

- I love that that's trying to blend in.

- What is it like normally?
- Anna, with the vibe of,

oh no, the smaller boat is
right behind me, isn't it?

- Uh...

We're gonna need a bigger boat.

- [Sam] Hannah, like Emma Stone.

- Um... [chuckles]

[Josh laughs and Anna shrieks]
- [Sam] Love that!

- We're gonna need, like, a bigger boat.

[Sam laughing]

[laughs] Emma Stone.

- Josh, like the Crypt
Keeper setting up a pun.

[high-pitched] - We're going to
need a bigger boat! [cackles]

- [Sam] Anna, like your
lucky craps sh**ting phrase.

[gruffly]
- We're gonna need a bigger boat!

- Whoa!

- And finally, Hannah, while
reporting in a hurricane.

[gasping]
- We're.. we're-

- We're going to need a bigger boat.

- And that's a minigame!

[cheerful music]

That brings us to round one.

- Let's go.
- Let's go.

- Let's do this.

- And then us, and then
the three of us in a line.

- And one.
- And a caboose! Good.

- Josh.
- Ha!

Why?
- No!

- No, not me.
- No!

- Godzilla versus Josh Ruben.

- As they say on my merch, no problem.

- Wow, on his merch.

[Josh mimics an echoing roar]

[Mimicking distant explosions]

[roars]

[explosions and roars continue]

- Yeah, okay! Let's
go, you f*cking lizard!

[Josh roars and inhales]

Oh yeah, I can blow back
too. [exhales sharply]

[Josh breathing fire]

[Josh screaming]

This is very unevenly matched!

This is extremely unevenly matched!

He's doing it again!

[inhales]

[Josh roars and breathes fire]

Not again!

[Sam and crew laughing]

[weakly]
This is not evenly matched.

This is not evenly matched.

[mimics jets flying]
Oh, now you show up?

[Josh mimicking g*nf*re and roaring]

[Hannah laughing]

And I'm just back here burning like,

it's a little too late for
me, I'm a skeleton now!

[buzzer buzzing]
- Yay!

- Wow, Joshua.
- So Godzilla walks like this?

- Well, he got that wedgie.
- That's right.

- "Godzilla Minus One" points for you.

- That was a blockbuster though, so-

- And Anna.
- [burps] Yep.

Excuse me!

- The Simlish Pledge of Allegiance.

[Anna speaking Simlish patriotically]

[Anna speaking Simlish]

[Anna speaking Simlish]

[Anna speaking Simlish]

[all laughing]

...America.
[buzzer buzzing]

- [Sam] Damn!

- I played a lot of "Sims


- A little bit in common
with the e-girl dances.

- Oh, absolutely.
- [Sam] Yeah, yeah, yeah!

An absolute mother lode
amount of points to you.

- Oh! He knows the hacks.

- Hannah!
- Okay.

- Accepting an Oscar

while shimmying your way out of a wedgie.

- First of all, I want
to thank Megan Scoops,

whom without, Dung Beetle
would never have been possible.

I want to thank John Favastooz, who...

And if you could just
hold this for one second.

- Sure.

- Who, thank you!

Who, without whom,

I would've k*lled everybody on set!

And I want to thank my mom,

who I'm estranged from,

and my son,

who I am estranged from,

and go ahead and just pull it, thank you.

- And [buzzer blaring]

I will cut you off there, Hannah. Yeah.

A lifetime achievement
amount of points for you

- I definitely got kind of
the least amount of points.

- Yeah, someone's not
going home with the ear.

- It's chocolate, and I want it!

[Everyone laughing]

- Josh.
- Ah!

- Josh.
- Yeah.

- Josh.
- Huh.

- Josh.
[Josh barks]

Josh.
[Josh meows]

Josh.
[Josh snorts]

Josh.
- Yes?

- Hannibal Lector at Sweetgreen.

- Let me see. What do I want?

I want some of those croutons

on top of some of that arugula.

[Sam laughing]

I want the Clamato on top
of a broken up tomato.

I want you to mix it up with
a little bit of olive oil,

some vinegar, and a nice [gasps]

heart of palm.

[Sam laughing]

And then I want to ask
you about what it was like

when you were a child,

before, before you started
working in a salad place.

Did you take your little tongs out

to play with your little
fruits and your vegetables?

Taking out raisins? Did you, Anna?

- What?

- Oh, I bet you were a
strange, strange little boy.

[Josh breaking into
laughter and crew laughing]

Weren't you? Did you cry?

Did you cry when your mama said

you couldn't have any more cranberries?

Did you cry when she said you can't put

any more cranberries on the-
- Oh, sir, please!

- Were you putting all kinds
of dried fruit on salad?

It's a weird choice. It's weird, Anna.

- Oh, sorry, you forgot the...

- You want it mixed?
- Yes.

- And cut,
[buzzer buzzing]

with the button provided
from player number three.

- Hell yeah.
- Thank god.

- I think we'll say 12 points for you.

- Oh, did you give me 12 points?

Is that what you gave your
friend, your friend on the farm,

your friend who talked like a little-

- You know what you look like to me?

You look like an improvisor.

[Anna and Josh gasp]

- Anna.
- Hi, Sam.

- A teenage manic mutant
pixie ninja dream turtle girl.

[Everyone laughing]
- [Anna] So many...

[Anna gasps girlishly]

I'm here to fight crime!

[Sam laughing]

- Oh no, it's a teenage
mutant ninja pixie...

Pixie ninja turtle girl!

- That's right, and I'm here
to beat the sh*t out of you.

- Oh, I'm just a brain.

Can you just explain
something to me real quick?

So you're a mutant-

- I see something in your eyes.

- Oh. Oh, wait, you're
actually going to listen to me?

- Wait, I'm going to put a record on.

- Oh, okay.

- My dad used to play this record for me.

♪ Three little birds by my window ♪

♪ And they told me I don't need to worry ♪

- The thing is-
- Yeah?

- It's tough being a
teenage manic mutant pixie

ninja dream turtle girl.
- Turtle girl.

- Some days, I don't know,
I just want to run away.

Get away from all this
and leave this town.

And then I see you.

- You seem so available,
and yet totally unavailable.

- I refuse to go to therapy.

- I was kind of hoping we could just f*ck.

- No, but I can fix you.

[nunchuck noises]
- [Josh] I wanted-

[Sam and crew laughing]

- Oh sh*t!

[Josh in distress]

- And I will...
[buzzer buzzing]

Oh my god.

I can see Anna going, "Now
bring the ninja turtle back."

- [Anna] Yeah! Yeah.

- Got a little carried
away with the other part.

- 400 billion points to you.

- I'm f*cking sweeping up!

- Hannah.
- Mm.

- Off-brand Bond villain vag*na Plenty.

[crew laughing]
[players snickering]

[Sam laughing]

- Mm-mm.

- All right, vag*na. Oh my god!

[odd foreign accent]
- Did you notice the odor?

In 20 minutes, you're gonna drop dead

on account of my [indistinct].

- Yeah, you can keep the gold.

- Come here. Come closer.

- I don't want to.

- [Anna] Are you? Are you-

- No, you don't get to k*ll yourself

till you get a closer look.

- Please!

- Get up close and
personal with my nethers.

- Please, please!

- All right, I'll get up to you.

[Josh screaming and groaning]

[everyone laughing]

[Josh imitating g*nshots]

- She straight-up k*lled-

- [Anna] Please don't look at me.

Please, vag*na Plenty!

- Let me show you something.
- Oh god!

The back!

[Sam and Josh laughing]
[Crew laughing]

- I want you to watch me
do a very small dance.

- Okay.

- Is it working?

- I have to go in.

- Ah! Please!
[buzzer buzzing]

Please make it stop!
[buzzer buzzing]

- Perverts!
[buzzer buzzing]

- Can I just say, for the record,
I have now died like this,

like a Muppet going down a blender...

That was unhinged. Oh my god.

This is the squiggle show.
- This is the squiggle show.

- This is the late night squiggle show.

- This is not your mom's squiggle show!

- We'll say points, 30 points, for you.

[cheerful music]

Which brings us to our second minigame.

This is a little minigame

we like to call Choose Your Character.

Josh, I'm going to ask
you to come over here

to the play space just
in front of the door.

Simple rules, Anna and Hannah,

you're in the character
customization screen

of a video game, you know,
the type that lets you

change your character's
face, body, everything.

- Uh-huh.
- Josh, you be the character

on that screen, make sense?

Josh just winked at me. It was real cute.

- It was really cute.

- The name of this video
game is Muscle Punch.

Take it away whenever you're ready.

- Okay, we want him to be the
strongest in the bone yard.

- Definitely. I wonder
why he's Winnie the Pooh.

Just a shirt, no bottoms.
- Oh, bother!

- I'm gonna make the calves huge.

[Josh imitating adjustment sounds]

[Anna and Hannah chuckling]
[Sam laughing]

- Oh, bother!

- I'd love to add that
he has a sort of secret.

[Sam and players laughing]

- Okay, and now his fingernails.

He hasn't clipped them in 17 years.

- Ooh, lots of rings.

- Rings, rings. On the nails, too.

[Sam laughing]

Let's put his gravity on pretty low, huh?

- [Hannah] Yeah.

[Sam and crew laughing]

- Even lower gravity, probably.

Okay, wait, that's too low.
- [Hannah] Okay, okay, okay.

- Put it back up.

- What about a really heavy top hat

that kind of weighs him down?
- [Anna] Yeah.

And the top hat is straight,

and then it's really big on top.

There's a donut on top,

so it sort of sets him
off balance a little bit.

Okay, and let's make the
voice really, really high.

- Ooh, I love high.

- Oh, bother!
- I hate it, I hate it.

Back down.
- Oh, bother.

- What about if he spontaneously raps?

- Yeah, let's do that.

- Ha ha, yeah. Ha ha, yeah. Oh bother-

- Less "Hamilton", Less "Hamilton".

- I'm a bear, got a secret.

[Sam laughing]

- Wait, let's make it more spoken word.

- I'm a bear, with a secret.

- Okay, but he feels weird about it.

- [Hannah] Yeah.
[Josh whinging]

- And let's make his muscles
really big so he can punch.

- And cut! That'll do it.
[buzzer buzzing]

[cheerful music]

That brings us to round
two, where our players

will now test their
talents in teams of twos.

- What?
- Josh.

- Yeah.
- And Anna.

- Yeah.
- A couple calls for the check

but doesn't know the hand motion.

- Oh my god, this was such a great dinner.

- It was so good, and the
cacio e pepe was incredible.

- Yeah, it was pretty awesome.
Do you want to take off?

- I would love to go.
- Okay, cool.

- Cool, so shall we get the check?

- Yeah.
- Okay.

I'll get the check.
- Yeah, yeah.

- Woo-doo-doo-doo-doo!

Hello! Why don't you call for the check?

- Yeah, I want it. I want it!

- He wants it!
- I want it!

- Hey, he wants it!

- Sorry, didn't see the signal, so-

[crew laughing]

- Okay, that's fine.
- Yeah, yeah, no.

We're gonna get out of
here. It's okay, sweetie.

- I would like the check.

- Yes, does that work?

- The big ones. I would like the check.

- The big one!

- I'm going to need you guys
to bring it down, please.

[Sam laughing]

- Sweetheart, I want to go, but-

- The check.

- I'm going to try something else, okay?

- Go for it.
- Okay, cool.

You-
- I?

- Get on my back.
- Okay.

- Okay, and now scream.
[Anna screams]

- Did you want the check?
- Yes!

- And cut!
[buzzer buzzing]

- Please, we need the check!
- Please, please, please!

- Sometimes that's what it takes.

- That's the universal signal.
- Oh my god.

- Sorry for doing that.

- Oh my god, our poor
sound, shaking his head.

- Oh my god, I'm sorry!

- Let's say 45 points with
gratuity to the both of you.

- Hey!
- Hey!

And the gratuity could be a
thousand million percent, even.

- Anna.
- Sam Reich!

- And Hannah.
- All right.

- The friendship between
two straight people

who will both come out in college.

- So, our true stories?
- These are personal prompts.

Personal prompts, Sam.

- Hi. Hi.
- Hey, you.

Oh, sorry!
- Oh! Oh my god!

[Cheering from crew]
[Sam laughing]

- Whoa. Gee.

That was...[giggling]

- That was-
- Not something I would enjoy!

- Same. It's like, don't do that again.

- Don't do that again.
I wouldn't do it again!

Stop.

- Should I do it back?

- Yeah, just to see what
it was like, as a joke.

- Yeah, as a joke,
'cause you did it to me.

[Sam and crew laughing]

- Fist bump!

It was just bottoms
that bumped, I noticed.

- Your butt looks great,
girl! You're at the gym?

- Thank you, I hope I'm
making the boys turn.

- I bet you're making
the guys' mouth foam.

- Hey.

- Ew.
- Hey, how you doing?

[Sam and crew laughing]

- So, listen.
- Yeah.

- Strictly friends talking.

- Yeah, strictly friends talking.

- Don't break eye contact when
I say this. You're amazing.

- That's literally how I feel about you.

- You're literally the
best friend I've ever had-

- You're my best friend I've
ever had in my entire life.

- You're the best.

[Infatuated babbling]

- It's like I wish we could
be closer. I wish we could be-

- I wish I could climb
inside of you and live there.

- I wish I could live in your mouth

and feel the moisture of your mouth.

- You can.
- Hey, Hannah!

- Stop!

[Sam and crew laughing]

He's such a cutie.
- He's really...

He's hot!

[buzzer buzzing]
- And I will

cut you off there, god!

- That one seemed to
come naturally for us.

[Anna laughing]

- Hey, girls!

- No.
- No, thank you!

- One whirlwind of an
upcoming summer break

for the both of you.

Hannah.
- Yes.

- And Josh.
- Ah!

- A driverless car flirting with a cop

to get out of a ticket.

- Woo-woop!

Roll it down.
- Rolling down.

Hello, Officer. How are you?

- Are you aware what you were doing?

- I am an automatic car. I'm a prototype.

What are you up to?

[Sam and Anna laughing]

- I was just patrolling the street,

and I noticed you were going a bit fast.

- Oh, fast like physically, or...

[Sam, Anna, and crew laughing]

- Yeah, that's the one.

- Well-
- Where are you from?

- Well, I'm from a plant outside of Texas.

- Beautiful this time of year.

- Sorry, my artificial
nose had a bit of an itch.

- You need a hanky?
- Actually, I'd love that.

If you wouldn't mind scratching it for me,

we could just pretend
I didn't itch myself,

'cause I'm an automated car.

Ah.
- Where do I...

I don't know where your nose is.

- That's good, that's good.
My sensors are aflutter.

Uh, uh, uh. Thank you.

- Okay, can I get your
license and registration?

- Yes, it's 29244411XBB6.

- Hey, I heard you calling for backup.

Damn, I want to f*ck this car!

[Josh and Sam laughing]

- It's all yours.

- Door open.

- How does this work?
- Am I in you now?

- Okay, let's go. Yeah,
that's pretty much it.

- And I'll cut this off
there. [buzzer blaring]

- [Josh] I'll never forget her.

- [Sam] Very sweet.
- I thought that was great.

- We will say 30 points
over the speed limit

to the both of you.

Josh
- Huh?

- and Anna.

- And me?

- Two gamers speedrun a relationship.

- Hey!
- Oh, hey, wow.

Nice to meet you.
- Okay.

- All right, cool.

- Okay.
- Want to move in?

- Yeah, let's move in.

I'm pregnant.
- Yeah. Oh sh*t, okay.

Pretty stressed out now.

- I'm stressed out too.
- Yeah.

- I feel like you're not
communicating well with me.

- I'm having an affair.
- Oh, okay.

I have to beat the boss, at work.

- I'm gonna help you.

- Okay.
- I want to do it with you.

- Okay.
- I want to reunite,

and beat the boss together.

- What is it?
- We just want to tell you,

how you're treating her is not right.

- It's not right.
- Okay?

- Just because you fired Amy last week

doesn't mean that I have to
pick up all of Amy's tasks.

You should hire another person.

- You know what? You're absolutely right.

Not only am I resigning, I'm
never going to work again.

- And then we get buried together.

- Yeah, then we get buried.

- That's it! That's it!

- Perfect.
- Super efficient!

Let's say 40 fully optimized points.

- Okay.
- Anna.

- Yes.
- And Hannah.

- Anna, Hannah. Hannah, Anna.

- Two catty teens critique
Josh's performance.

- What's with this guy's f*cking face?

Can his tongue go back
in his f*cking mouth?

- Wait a minute, is he using a watch

that's just like an old-timey one?

- I just got it 'cause I needed one.

- How old do you think he is? 40?

- What's your sign?

- Uh-
- Classic.

[Sam cackling]

- He's always doing bird noises.

Do one, Josh. Do it.
[Josh does a bird noise]

Yeah, what do you think you
are? A human sound machine?

- I just do stuff with my friends.

[Anna and Sam laughing]

- Wait, what about his stance?

It's like one leg left, one leg straight.

What even is that?

- I'm knock-kneed.

- Oh my god, you can't say that, Hannah.

He's knock-kneed.

[Sam laughing]

- f*ck.
- Sorry.

- I think it happens when
you're a baby, and you're down-

- You know that you have the option,

your parents have the option
if you're knock-kneed,

to actually break both of
your knees when you're a baby.

- So why didn't they do that?

[Sam and crew laughing]

- So you're the neighbors always now, or-

- Yeah, and we're gonna be up late!

[Sam laughing]

[buzzer buzzing]

- Yeah, I'll cut this off there.

What an absolute nightmare.

- They're so mean!
- Stop making me do those.

They're so mean!

- I know, it's hard to be mean.

- For sure, yeah.
- Sorry, Josh.

- It's all right.

- Let's say 100 points
to Josh for that prompt.

- Wait.

- And finally, the last
prompt of round two.

Hannah.
- Mm.

- And Josh.
- Ha!

- I'm gonna go.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

- Going home with someone who has

a really specific voice for their pet.

- Is this your spot?

- This is my spot, welcome.
Make yourself cozy.

You want a Negroni Sbagliato
with Prosecco in it?

- I'm a little Negronied
out, but yes, I do.

- Here's a red wine.

- Oh, just red wine. Wow, okay.

- Oh!
- You have a pet?

- Yeah, Nathaniel's coming up.

- What kind of-

[gutturally] Hello, my sweet baby!

[Sam and crew laughing]

There's my sweet baby...
[grunting indistinctly]

Come on over, get in Mama's lap!

[Anna laughing]

Aw, she likes you. Come here.

- Oh yeah? Wow.

- Come on over, meet the
man I'm gonna have sex with.

- Do I have to do that for her to like me?

- Um, she likes-

You can ask her questions
like, how old are you?

How old are you?

- How old are you, Natie?

- That's, what are you-
- How old are you, Nathaniel?

Should I do it more like this? [grunting]

You want to be tell me how
old you are? Oh my god!

- She's licking you!
- Oh my god. How old are you?

- How old are you?
- How old are you?

- I love my dog.
- I love you too!

- I love my hairy, hairy dog.

- You're a hairy little dog!

- Give us a kiss.

- [Anna] Woof!

Woof, woof, woof!
- Aw.

She's really sick.
[buzzer buzzing]

[buzzer blaring again]

- Oh my god.

- I didn't want to say this
in the end of round one,

but this is absolutely
the most unhinged episode

of this show.
- I mean-

- [Sam] It's incredible.

- Now, sometimes, 30%.

- Keep it.

- Think that all of this moment would be-

- I do.

- That it'll be cut for time.

- Or for quality.
- [Anna] I loved it!

- Whatever you're going to say-

- [Anna] I loved it!

- Let's put it back in the mutual pot.

- How about when you don't like it,

instead of points, you
do stuff to our cars?

[Everyone laughing]

And you lost a mirror!

[laughing continues]

- If we could get a PA out with a crowbar-

- Get the PA. It's a Hyundai Elantra.

Go ahead and go to town on it.

- He didn't like it, Sean.

- I went home with a golden
ear, but my car is ruined.

[cheerful music]

That brings us to our third minigame.

This is a minigame we
like to call Translator.

Anna and Josh, I'm going to
ask you to switch places,

and Josh, you are going in the middle.

Josh is going to be our foreign politician

speaking in a gibberish foreign language.

Anna and Hannah are, in
turn, going to take turns

translating what Josh
is saying, make sense?

- Okay, yeah.

- We have a little bit of
art to inspire you, Josh.

Paul, if I could have that prop, please.

[players oohing]

- Interesting.

- Take it away, Josh,
whenever you are ready.

- Hey, everyone.
- Hey, everybody.

[Josh speaking gibberish]

- I'm gonna let everyone know,

it is my birthday in six months.

[Josh speaking gibberish]

- Invites are going out this week.

[Josh speaking gibberish]

- My mom's here, my dad's
here. You, get out of here.

[Josh speaking gibberish]

- Sparkly juice.

[Sam laughing]

- Ah...

- Let me take a sip.

[Anna laughing]

- Glug, glug, glug, glug, glug, glug.

[Josh speaking gibberish]

I am allergic.
[Josh grunting]

- sh*t, sh*t, sh*t.

[Josh speaking gibberish]

- I actually do have an
EpiPen in my backpack.

[Josh speaking gibberish]

It didn't work.

[Sam and crew laughing]

[Josh speaking gibberish]

[Sam laughing]

I am still having an allergic reaction.

- But scan this barcode,

'cause we're all going to Coachella!

- [speaking gibberish] sparkly juice.

- Coachella's amazing
lineup is so good this year.

- I'm going to drink more sparkly juice

that I'm allergic to.

[Josh gasping]

[Josh speaking gibberish]

- I'm headlining Coachella!

[everyone laughing]

[Josh speaking gibberish]

- It's gonna be me, the Chainsmokers.

- No, no! [speaking gibberish]

- I can only have two VIP passes.

- Please!

- There's gonna be a hologram of me.

[Josh speaking gibberish frantically]

- Tickets are $8,000 and
you can Venmo me directly.

[Josh speaking gibberish]
...listening to me.

- They're not listening to me.

And we won't.

- And we won't.

- Hey, like that ending
quite a bit. [buzzer blaring]

Bravo.

- He wanted help so bad.
- You got it.

[cheerful music]

- That brings us to round
three, where our players

will now hold hands and jump
into the abyss together.

Josh. Anna.
- It's me.

- Hannah.

A stock photographer

asking their models for
super specific scenarios.

- All right, girls, go over
here. Down here, down here.

- Oh, okay.
- Okay.

- Down there. Okay, I'll be up here.

- Just really grateful
for the opportunity.

- Yeah, thank you so much, again.

- All right, all right.
- It's nice to meet you.

My name's Peather. It's Heather with a P.

- Hi, that's so nice. I'm Charlemagne.

- Okay girls, that's actually really good.

Hold that handshake, but two less fingers

on both hands, okay?

Two less fingers on both hands,

but incorporate your other hand.

Incorporate your other hand.

Two less fingers. That's good.

Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it.

Hold it, hold it. Look at camera.

What's your name, Pleather?

Pleather, look at camera
and close one eye.

And little one, what's your name?

- You can call me little one.

- Okay, little one. Little
one, don't look at me.

Okay? Look down.

Look down and think
about the worst moment,

just your worst day ever, okay?

And Pleather, can you look over here,

and just a little bit less teeth, okay?

Good, ready, and up on
one foot, up on one foot.

Only Pleather please, not little one.

Little one, down on one foot.

Okay, three, two, two, two, two, and snap!

Great, now we're going to get really low.

I'm going to come up real high.

- Perfect, low angle's
always the best for women.

- Okay, great, great. Excellent.

I don't want to see either of your faces.

We're gonna get really specific, okay?

Turn away. Yeah, good,
that's exactly what's good.

And little one, just point your butt

towards all my other friends' cameras.

[Crew laughing]

Good, good, great. No,
no, no! Not like that!

Not like that at all!
Natural, natural, natural!

Okay, don't, don't! No, don't!

Don't do it that way! Less specific!

- Trouble's afoot.

- No, that's not right! This isn't right!

- What?
- It feels really right.

- It feels right.
- This doesn't feel right!

Can you do one of me?

[buzzer buzzing]
- And cut.

- Can you do one of me?
- One of me?

- Let's say 18 points that'll be memes

in three years for the lot of you.

- So sort of like crypto.
- All of us get 18 points?

- Do we have to split 18
by three? Which is six.

- Last prompt of our game.
- Ooh!

- And then we go home to our busted cars?

[Sam laughing]

- Yeah, how much damage is
there going to be to my car?

- Will our cars be waiting
for us? Just say yes or no.

- Your cars will be waiting for you.

I don't know how recognizable they'll be.

- I just got word that mine's
just on the 110 somewhere?

[Josh and Anna laughing]

- Josh?
- Ha!

- Anna.
- Yes.

- Hannah.
- Yep.

- Yep.
- Chips?

- The producers at this audition

want to know if you're
open to certain things.

- How are you with
juggling? Do you juggle?

- Yeah, we'd like to
see you juggle bricks.

- And are you comfortable
with heavy things

that you threw up in the air,
per juggling, falling down?

- [Anna] Like bricks.

We're probably gonna have
bricks falling while you juggle.

- Are you comfortable getting very hurt?

- Are you comfortable getting really hurt

emotionally too, like your heart broken?

- Yes, berated emotionally to no end.

- You probably might fall
in love with one of us.

- Are you comfortable
with having a relationship

with one of us?

[Sam laughing]

- Is that something that
you'd be interested in,

and could you point at which one?

- Which one, more decisively?
- Which one?

- [Josh] More decisively?
- More decisively.

You're shaking, you're
shaking. Put the bricks down.

- Seems a little noncommittal.

- [Anna] Point, point.
- Point more decisively.

- Point, point. Oh!
- Oh!

- Who would you have a
relationship with? Wow.

- Wow.
- Wow!

- Wow.
- Okay.

- Wow.
- Well-

- Wow.
- None of us.

- None of us.

- Can you give us just one
moment, just to quickly confer?

- They're amazing!
- They're amazing.

- I'm obsessed.

- I love them. I'm literally gagged.

- I'm gagged! I'm gooped!

- Do you want to-
- You should do it.

It's your passion project.

- You're hired.

- Oh, they don't want to work with us.

- Oh.
- Oh.

- And cut.
[buzzer buzzing]

- Scary stuff.

- And that's just the
pilot of The Squiggles!

Are you uncomfortable? We're not!

- We're confident in what we just did.

- Squiggles do improv
a little differently.

Lots of falling bricks
coming to theaters this fall.

- Yay!
- Yeah, let's say 511 points

willing to shave for each of you.

- Wait, how many?
- 511.

- I was like, nine?

- That brings us to the end of our show.

Our winner tonight...

Hannah Pilkes.

[Josh and Anna cheering]
[cheerful music playing]

Hannah, you are the recipient

of the coveted golden ear.

- Hannah!

- That does it for us
here at "Make Some Noise".

Tune in next time for
more of the game samer.

I'm Sam Reich, and that sounds
pretty good to me. Goodnight.

[cheerful music continues]