05x09 - Evil Pizza Guys

[bunniefuu]

[beeping]

[theme music]

[laughing]

[gasp]

Mamma mia!

[screaming]

[explosions]

[music playing]

ALEX: Hmm.

Uh, girls?

Does euro villain Lars
Van Der Baddie get

filed under L, V, or D, or B?

Ugh.

[gasp]

Beats me.

By the way, how many euro liters
are in a 12 cup coffee pot?

I'll have to get back
to you on that one.

Right now I'm a little
busy euro photocopying.

[beeping]

PHOTOCOPIER: Error.
Error.

[non-english]

[sigh]

Is it me, or are
these missions Jerry has

us working on incredibly lame?

Totally.

I thought when he brought us
to Euro-WOOHP for his R&R trip

we'd be doing new things, not
cooped up in some dingy office.

[sigh]

If only Jer was here
so we could complain.

Hey, maybe he can be.

After all, think
about where we are.

[gasp]

You're so right, Sammy.

We can WOOHP him!

[evil laughter]

I'm sure one of these
buttons will do the trick.

[sighing]

Hmm.

[tap]

[gasping]

Clover!

Oopsie.

Err.

[beep]

[grunt]

Clover!

Sorry.

[grunt]

[beep]

[grunting]

Hmm?

Hey.

Oh.

[grunting]

[beep]

[rumbling]

Clover!

OK, OK.

This next one has to be it.

[grunting]

Hiya!

OK, everyone.

I expect a fair fight.

No splashing, no
pushing, no blowing.

Now, good luck and may
the best captain win.

Ready!

Set!

Launch!

What in the world?

Ah!

[gasping]

[screaming] Ohh my!

I can't believe it.

I've just been WOOHPed!

[grunt]

I wonder what's
taking Jer so long.

Like, maybe I should
push that button again?

[gasp]

[grunting]

Oh, please!

Once is more than an enough.

[grunting]
[cheering]

Hey!

It actually worked.

Sorry for the harsh WOOHPing,
Jer, but really need to talk.

Yeah, all this office
work is driving us crazy.

As in you better give us
some major euro freedom,

like pronto.

[electric frying]

After what's just occurred
I quite agree that you

could use a little downtime.

[cheering]

[giggling]

Indeed.

But before I let you go, I have
a little something for you.

Don't bother, Jer.

We won't need any gadgets
while we're off sightseeing.

I don't know about
you girls, but I

have got a serious Rome Jones.

Oh, I'm not giving you
any spy gear, Samantha.

[gasp]

You mean, you're giving us
a totally sweet euro ride?

Something like that.

[gasp]

[trumpet playing]

[gasp]

Wow.

When you said little something,
you meant little something.

But how are we supposed
to fit in there, Jer?

I mean, this is WOOHP,
not clown college.

Though the Micro
appears small,

it's actually quite
roomy on the inside.

Plus it's compact design
makes parking a snap.

Cheerio.

[screaming]

[engine noise]

Roomy on the inside?

As if.

Mmm.

Uh, Al, are you sure this
is the right way to Rome?

According to the
Micro's digi-map we should

be there right about now.

Ha!

Hmm.

Mhm.

Alex!

That isn't Rome, it's
a smear of chocolate.

Oops.

It must've dripped out of
my afternoon euro pastry.

[tire screech]

Well, what are
we going to do now?

We're totally lost.

No worries.

We can just go to that
cute little village

and ask for directions.

[engine noise]

Why do cute
villages always have

to have cobblestone streets?

I don't know, but we
better pull over before we

and the Micro come
apart at the seams.

Are you crazy, Al?

There's no way I'll
be able to squeeze

into that puny little spot.

Just d-d-do it before we
all t-t-toss our crepes.

[screeching]

[hissing]

Wow, I guess Jer
wasn't kidding when he

said parking would be a snap.

Wow, girls, this place
is big time beauteous.

Apparently, we're the
only ones who think so.

As in creepy Italian
ghost town much.

Maybe everyone's
on summer holiday.

Good point, Alex.

Except for the part
where it's March.

[grunt]

Besides, that
doesn't explain why

all the store's
doors are wide open,

and everyone's cars
are still here.

In that case, our
sightseeing trip

just turned into a spy mission.

[footsteps]

Except for the
eerie silence, I'm not

catching anything too unusual.

[screaming]

Alex?
Alex?

Where'd you go?

ALEX: Down here!

Oh no!

Ugh.

I'm fine.

Just stumbled into a crater
filled with some kind

of weird red goo.

A goo that smells
like marinara sauce.

[expl*si*n]
[gasp]

What was that?

I'm not sure.

But I don't think we should
stick around to find out.

[explosions]

I guess now we know why
everyone in the town fled.

This place is under attack.

[explosions]

[screaming]

[explosions]

[screaming]

Look out!

Come on, we can hide in here.

[explosions]

[sigh]

Oh!

Good choice, Sammy.

These fuchsia baguette
bags are to die for.

[giggles]

Ah, Earth to Clover.

Now is not the
time for shopping.

We're having you notice that
it's raining calzone bombs.

As in mega-sized
baked turnovers

of pizza dough filled with
veggies, cheese, and sauce?

Yeah!

The same sauce I
fell into earlier.

[gasp]

She's right.

And boy, do they pack a punch.

And there goes a
giant flying pizza.

[expl*si*n]

[explosions]

[grunt]

Hmm, look kind of yummy too.

JULIANO: I told you, brother.

This town ain't big enough
for both of our pizza shops.

Aha.
- I agree, brother.

Which is why it would to be
a good time for you to leave.

[grunt]

[expl*si*n]

Saa!

[g*nsh*t]

[explosions]

[grunting]

[expl*si*n]

[gasp]

Feuding pizza brothers?

OK, it's official,
Europe is way whacky.

At least now we know it's
not us who's being targeted.

[grunting]

[grunt]

[expl*si*n]

[grunt]

[expl*si*n]

Still, we got to
do something fast.

Or not only is the town
going to be destroyed,

but we're going to be majorly
caught in the crossfire.

I'm with you, Sammy.

On account of there's no way I'm
getting taken out by takeout.

I've got an idea.

Quick, grab as many
belts as you can carry.

[grunting]

I don't know, Sam.

over accessorizing
is a major fashion

offence, even on spy missions.

Just trust me, and
follow me up to the roof.

[grunt]

[gasp]

[sigh]

[grunting]

[screaming]

Look out!
[explosions]

[grunting]

[coughing]

What part of,
trust me, includes

crawling through grossie
old smoke stacks.

[coughing]
- Yeah!

The human chimney sweeper team
totally trashed my outfit.

OK time to stop complaining
and start improvising.

- Uh, I don't follow.
- Don't you see?

I'm making my very own
batty nabbing bungee belt.

[whooping]

[grunt]
[whooping]

[grunt]

[whopping]
- Yeah!

Huh?

[whopping]

Haha!

Awesome idea, Sammy.
Ya!

Ya!

[whopping]

Now, let it rip, Al.

You got it.

[laughing]

Take that, you
second rate hack.

[explosions]

[grunting]

Who are you calling second
rate, you no good has been?

[grunt]

[expl*si*n]

[whopping]

Huh?

[thud]

[grunting]

What's happening?

What's happening is,
you're totally busted.

OK boys, start talking.

Yeah, as the victim
of an unwanted saucing,

I demand to know exactly
what you're fighting about.

Ah, It's simple.

Me, Juliano, with my
signature calzone,

I'm the best pizza
maker in the town.

Please, it's me, Giuseppe,
and my exquisite pepperoni

pizza, who's the number one.

So let me get this straight.

You're willing to destroy an
entire town and each other,

just to prove who's
the better pizza chef?

Yes.

Hello?

Overly dramatic much.

Huh?

Hmm.

Look, all we've got to
do is a little taste test

and we can end this
feud once and for all.

Hey, that's a
great plan, Clover.

Yeah!

Bring on the grub.

[laughing]

[laughing]

Hmm.

Ha.

[grunt]

Hmm.

[music playing]

[whimpering]

[chewing]

So what do you think?

Mmm, excellent
choice of flavors.

[grunt]

And mine?

Wow, Amazing
blend of textures.

Ahh!

So who's the winner?

It's a tie.

Your both way talented cooks.

Huh?

Which is why you should
give up the silly argument

and go into business together.

You think so?

Really?

Totally.

OK, si.
I'll do it.

Me too.

Good.

Now shake on it.

Now, if you can promise to
behave yourselves and stop

fighting, we'll let you leave.

Deal.

Arrivederci.

I don't know about you
guys, but after all this feud

settling I'm completely wiped.

Me too.

What do you say, we resume
our Rome trip in the AM?

Fine, but with all the
hotel owners out of town,

it looks like we're going to
have to sleep in the Micro.

No!

Are you nuts?

There's no way I'm
sleeping in that shoe box.

Sorry, Clover.
We don't have much of a choice.

Fine, but I'm warning
you, hatchbacks are

so non-beauty sleep conducive.

Not only will we
join forces, but we'll

become the greatest pizza duo
in all of Italy by any means

necessary.

[music playing]

[cat meow]

[yawning]

Morning, ladies.

[gasp]

Jer!

What the heck are
you doing here?

There are some
strange abductions

occurring all over
Italy that I'd like

you ladies to check out ASAP.

What kind of abductions?

It appears that the
best pizza makers in Italy

have been reported missing
throughout the country.

[gasp]
[thud]

- Pizza makers?

I wonder if Giuseppe and
Juliano are in danger.

Giuseppe and Who-liano?

Juliano.

As in the feuding pizza maker
brothers we met last night.

That I don't know.

But I do know where each
of the crimes occurred.

Milan, Venice, and Florence.

Hey, Alex, queue up the
Micro's NAV system, would ya?

Ha!

It's just like I thought.

The abductors are making
their way south toward Rome.

Then that's exactly
where you need to go.

Well, what are
you waiting for?

Slap some gadgets on us.

Very well then.

Today we have the laser
lipstick, the helping hands

extender glove, and the
cool breeze high velocity

propeller beanie.

Good luck spies.

Forget it, Jer.

There's no way this puny
Micro is going to cut

it on a major spy mission.

Oh really?

Try pressing the horn.

Huh?

[trumpets playing]

[gasp]

Jerry?

Why didn't you tell us
about that function sooner?

What?

And ruin the comic effect?
Na.

[laughing]
[sigh]

[engine roaring]

[tires screeching]

Huh?

[beep]

[tires screeching]

[screaming]

[plane flying]

I can't believe
it, I'm finally

going to see Rome, the
most cultured, romantic,

historically rich
city in the world.

Uh, Earth to Sam.

Now who needs to focus?

Yeah, we're on a
mission, remember?

Hello?

It's called multitasking.

Hey, maybe I can join that
tour group down there.

[plane flying]

[gasp]

That tour group looks
like the abducted

pizza chefs Jer showed us.

And they're being led
by Juliano and Giuseppe

with some sort of super
strong dough shackles.

When they agreed
to work together,

I didn't think it was
going to be toward evil.

Come on!

Bah.

[non-english speech] You
call yourselves chefs, well,

you're no match for our
Krypeletosta titanium

infused secret formula dough.

Now hurry along.

The sooner we get rid
of you, the sooner

the world will only have our
delicious cooking to enjoy.

OK, if your plan was to take
the restaurant world by storm--

Hmm.

--you're going to need
some serious schooling

on your people skills.

[grunt]
- Huh?

[grunt]

We've got our people
skills covered, missy.

Si, as in, we're skillfully
rounding up all of the people

who are our competition, ah.

Yeah, right!

You're going to have to
get through us first.

Hiya!

[grunting]

[thudding]

[grunting]

Oh, where'd these
guys learn those moves?

What?

You think being a chef
is all sugar and flower?

Look out!

Olive oil slick.

[screaming]

[thudding]

[grunting]

[sigh]

[laughing]

[footsteps]

Gross.

This is like a hot oil
treatment gone way crazy.

Where do you think these
creepy cooks are taking us?

I think I have a
pretty good idea.

[gasp]

That's the Roman Colosseum?

It looks way smaller
in real life.

That's not the real
Colosseum, that's a restaurant

built to look like it.

Except, what's
with the weird roof?

[hissing]

Keep moving.

we're loosing heat.

Whoa, it's like
a sauna in here.

How's about sitting us
on the patio instead.

You'll all be happy to
know that you'll be receiving

the highest honor ever.

Mmm?

[beeping]

Juliano's right.

In any minute
you'll all be baked

into our latest, and the
greatest competitive kitchen

creation, the Stromzoni.

[laughing]

[gasp]

Enjoy.

Enjoy.

[screaming]

[chewing]

ALEX: Ahh.

So those loony brothers
actually rigged this place

up to be a giant stove?

[screaming]

I'm just relieved they didn't
do it to the actual Colosseum.

Reality alert, ladies,
the clock's ticking,

and if we don't
do something fast,

our goose is going to
be cooked, literally.

Normally, I won't get
caught dead wearing

something like this,
but desperate times

call for desperate accessories.

[whirring]

[screaming]

[whirring]

[sighing]

Bad look, but good
thinking, Clover.

Still, it's not going
to last forever.

We need to figure out
how to get out of here.

I vote we go up.

Bungee time.

Huh?

You're going to need
this more than I will.

Oh.

[grunting]

Phew, now I know what an apple
feels like stuck inside a pie.

What have you done to our
beautiful culinary creation?

[grunt]

We got company, spies.

Ahh!

[gasp]

[sigh]

Mamma Mia, look
what those girls have

done to my beautiful crust.

[grunting]

[laughing]

I vote we go down.

[whirring]

[screaming]

[grunting]

Haha, we've got enough
dough to have gadgets too.

[screaming]

Try to keep them occupied.

I have to get those chefs out
of there before it's too late.

[laughing]

[gasp]

[grunting]

Oh, terrif.

How do you even battle
weaponry like that?

[grunting]

Clover, shut down that
pizza slinging catapult.

Why can't you
just deliver pizza

in a car like normal people?

[thud]

[screaming]

Let me down before I
get spinning spy sickness.

[laughing]

[grunting]

[thudding]

[grunting]

Mmm.

This could be one of the
most delicious missions ever.

[music playing]

[whirring]

Oh.

[engulfing fire]

[screaming]

Ow.

Less than a minute before
those chefs are well done.

That dial must control
the temperature inside.

[grunting]

Stick around.

You haven't even
had the dessert yet.

[grunting]

[scream]

[grunting]

[laughing]

Now is when a girl could
really use a helping hand.

Hey.

Hiya!

[crashing]

[screaming]

What are you doing?

That's too hot, you'll burn it.

Hehe, oopsie.

[grunting]

Ah!

[grunting]

Turn down the heat, brother,
she's going to be ruined.

What can I do?

She break our oven.

[buzzing]

[grunting]

Girls, I think this would
be a good time to take cover.

If only I could move.

I'm on it, Sammy.

[laser zapping]

[expl*si*n]

[grunt]

[scoff]

Now you've done it.

Your a stupid
stromzoni did us in.

No.

You're a lousy cook and
you ruined our master plan.

[laughs]

You know, even if the
service was horrible I'm still

going to give you a tip, get
out of the restaurant business,

fast.

[music playing]

[door close]

Bye!

Bye!

Finally, the city
of Rome is in mine.

So what should we
do first, girls?

See some history?
Look for romance?

Do a little shopping?

Ohh, I don't think
I can make it, Sam.

I ate twice my weight
in Italian food,

and now I feel kind of
green behind the gills.

But this is our free time.

Come on, Clover,
what do you say?

It's Rome, the city of amore!

Sorry, Sammy.

We've got a spy in distress.

Hey Alex, you wouldn't
mind making a pit stop back

at the village, so I can buy
that fuchsia leather purse I

had my eye on, would ya?

But you can't go.

I haven't had a chance
to see Rome yet.

Get a grip, Sam.

It's just a dusty old city.

[beep]

[grunting]

[scream]

[trumpets playing]

[engine roaring]

Yee haw!

[tires screeching]

No!

It's not just a dusty old city!

I am not leaving!

There is so many things to
see, all the museums and--

I can't miss the museums!

No!

There are things to learn here!

[jet flying]

[theme music]