[birds calling]
[seagulls crying]
ADULT SASHA (VOICEOVER):
I struggle now to remember
much of my childhood.
It only comes back to me
in small fragments,
and even those memories
are hard to trust.
I do remember his maps.
It's true I spent most
of my life being angry at him.
The older I get,
the more I feel
like I never even knew him
at all.
My image of him now, I know,
falls flat
compared to reality.
Thank you for your memories.
They're all I have now.
[children giggle,
talking indistinctly]
[giggling]
CHILD: I have four
pillows in my car.
[indistinct chatter]
[gentle classical music]
[motor slows to a stop]
[vehicle door closes]
[vehicle doors closing]
MOTHER: Okay.
Boys, grab each one thing,
and come with me in the house.
Now.
[both speaking Hungarian]
FATHER: Jeremy, help me
with the mattress, please.
Ah!
[insects chirping]
[device clicking]
[music box playing light tune]
SASHA: I am Miss Mousey.
[device clicking]
[camera shutter clicks]
Closing her eyes.
She's eating your leg.
[camera shutter clicks]
[Mother speaking Hungarian]
Mm-hmm.
[children humming]
[children continue humming]
[laughing]
- [speaking Hungarian]
[door opens]
SASHA: Mom, your car keys.
MOTHER: Oh, thank you.
FELIX: Come on!
Get out of my way, come on!
MOTHER: Come.
[door closes]
[car doors open, close,
engine turning over]
[child shouts]
[children giggling]
SASHA: "And eventually
become an evergreen forest.
"The first plants
to occupy a disturbed site
"are called pioneer species,
the process of processing
into forest called succession."
[camera shutter clicking,
film whirring]
[seagulls crying]
NARRATOR (ON TV): The heron
has two methods of fishing,
either he waits
for the prey to come to him,
or else he st*lks it
very carefully.
[seagulls continue crying]
[birds calling]
NARRATOR (ON TV):
While one protects the nest,
the other fishes
to meet the daily increasing
need for food.
[children speaking
indistinctly]
As time passes, the ritual
exchanges between adults
become less and less frequent,
and the strong bond
between them begins to weaken.
By the time they finally
leave the colony,
these bonds will have
completely disappeared.
His flight path is sometimes
obstructed by other birds.
The direction
and force of the wind
can also prevent him
from landing,
so he takes off again
and tries a new approach.
[seagulls crying]
MOTHER: No, please,
no touching!
NARRATOR (ON TV): The young
herons have now reached
their full growth
and are left on their own.
[heron squawking]
They find food either guided
by their instinct
or by following the adults
to the feeding grounds.
[seagulls crying]
[car doors open]
[car doors close]
[engine turning over]
[cheerful music]
[children chattering
indistinctly]
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
- Come on, let's go.
- Yeah.
EMMA: Let's go
to my place first.
BECKY: I can't wait.
ASHLEY: Maybe you can ask your
mom if we can go in the pool.
I would love to go in the pool.
We could borrow some
of your swimsuits.
EMMA: Let's go.
Right over here.
[child giggles]
Did you do your dance?
SASHA: Yes, I did do my dance.
BECKY: I didn't see you!
I know.
EMMA: You have to do
a dance before we do it.
ASHLEY: Make sure
you do a dance.
EMMA: It's our tradition.
[all shouting happily]
CHILD: Wait...
[continues indistinctly]
BECKY:
Wait. She's right there.
[distant telephone ringing]
[object crunches]
[children whispering
indistinctly]
[loud crash]
SASHA: You guys!
[door swinging open]
Help.
NEIGHBOR: Stay calm.
SASHA: Help.
NEIGHBOR: Here, grab a hold
of this. Stay calm.
Here we go, here we go.
Yeah, just hold on.
Why did you do that,
sweetheart?
- [humming]
[vehicle engine roaring]
[continues humming]
FATHER: He wants to upset me.
He wants to upset you.
[Mother speaking Hungarian]
[Father speaking Hungarian]
MOTHER: He's--he's troubled,
but he's not crazy.
FATHER: And--
MOTHER: Crazy means
something else.
I just don't want you
to say something
like this about my son.
MOTHER: I mean, it's crazy
to leave him like this.
FATHER:
That's what they told us--
don't react, just let him
get bored of his own jokes.
[door closes]
Please check on him, please.
[door opens]
Is he still out there?
SASHA: Mm-hmm.
- What do you think about
Jeremy--how he's behaving?
SASHA:
I don't know.
MOTHER: Why do you
think he's like this?
- I don't know, Mom.
FATHER:
How did it go?
MOTHER:
Why is your hair wet?
- We played in the sprinkler.
[phone ringing]
Um, yeah, we've seen him.
Yeah, he's just acting out.
No.
No, I appreciate it.
[chuckles]
Um, yeah, yeah.
No, I'm--I'm with you.
Yes, yeah.
MOTHER:
Who was that?
FATHER:
Jason, from across the street.
[sighs]
He wanted to let us know
that our son
is dead on the front step.
- I told him we are aware
and not to worry.
He will come back to life soon.
[chuckles]
- Hmm.
[birds chirping]
[cereal rattles in bowl,
liquid pouring]
HENRY:
I woke up at 6:47.
FELIX:
Same, around maybe 7:00.
Did you know that
in the ocean--
you know a fun fact
about dolphins?
Want to know a fun fact?
Sometimes dolphins will find
a puffer fish and g*ng up on it
and bite onto it
and then toss it around
like a football
just to get high.
It's true.
[dishes clattering]
HENRY: Stop it.
- I don't want
to watch you eat.
Boys, do you know
where's your swimsuit?
HENRY:
I don't have one.
MOTHER: Okay, then you
should wear these underwears,
so no one will notice anyways.
FELIX:
Yeah.
- [speaking Hungarian]
[door closes]
[thumping]
[thumping continues]
MOTHER:
Sasha, come.
Let's go.
Bye.
[door closes]
[thumping continues]
[ball bouncing,
thumping continues]
Jeremy.
Come.
Jeremy.
Jeremy!
Jeremy, come!
Come with me now.
[car door closes]
Seat belts on.
[engine turning over]
[ball bouncing]
- You can't do it.
It's too heavy, dude.
It's, like, 50 pounds.
[child straining]
HENRY: There's not a lot.
FELIX: Let me see.
HENRY:
Like, four.
FELIX: Oh, there's a decently
big one right here.
Oh, he lost an arm.
SASHA: Aw, put him back!
Put him back!
[waves crashing]
[seagulls crying]
[children chattering happily]
[children cheering]
SASHA:
Don't.
[rock splashing]
[rock splashing]
[indistinct chatter]
[seagulls crying]
[insects chirping]
- Did he take
the money I gave you?
Hmm?
HENRY:
No.
MOTHER: Come on,
let's go to the car.
[thunder rumbling softly]
[Sasha sighs]
[children chattering
indistinctly]
SASHA:
Where's Jeremy?
FELIX: Where's Mom?
Where's Jeremy?
There's Mom.
[thunder rumbling]
[car door opens, beeping]
[engine turning over]
CHILDREN:
704, 705, 706,
707, 708, 709...
710, 711, 712,
713, 714, 715.
[vehicles passing by]
[dramatic music]
MOTHER:
Come. Come now.
[car seat rattling]
Stop it.
Do you want me to crash?
[sighs]
- [slurps]
- My friend
Don't just sit there
and ruminate
With your navel
to contemplate
It's a beautiful day
outside
Time's passing you by
FELIX:
Ah!
HENRY:
Here, Let me try.
Ah, damn.
FELIX: It didn't even land
over there.
[gentle music]
HENRY:
Oh, that was so close.
[indistinct chatter]
FELIX:
Yeah, sure.
Just don't sell me
the sausages.
[keys clacking]
- Dad, where's Mom?
FATHER:
She's at her appointment.
- What kind
of appointment?
Dad, what kind of appointment?
- Come, draw something for me.
Ta-da.
Sit.
- Yay.
Ooh.
What's this do?
- Try.
[mouse clicking]
- [gasps]
Wow.
- That's nice.
- Now, I need to--
FATHER:
That one.
It's going to be Miss Mousey.
SASHA:
Yeah.
FATHER:
I know.
SASHA: Ooh, that's big.
FATHER: That's one ear.
Can move it back.
SASHA: Oh.
Wait, wait, I'll do the bucket.
FATHER:
Pull some way just a little.
SASHA: Oh, no!
HENRY: Yeah, and then this, you
have to do it, like, slowly.
And can you take this?
A boat.
FELIX:
Yeah.
There we go.
Yeah, dude.
HENRY:
Hey, mine has water.
FELIX: Hey, blue boat
is still alive.
HENRY:
And so are mine.
FELIX: Looking kind
of rough, though.
HENRY:
Yeah.
Look at this.
FELIX:
You want one?
- No.
HENRY:
You wish.
[classical music]
[indistinct chatter]
[laughter]
[camera shutter clicks,
film whirs]
FATHER: Just try to find
nice shapes.
And focus
on the arrangements, okay?
Mm-hmm.
Nice so far, nice.
Lesson number one,
never do that.
Henry.
Time, now.
SASHA:
Who is that?
HENRY: Wow.
FELIX: Me.
FATHER:
Time is going backwards.
It's a time warp.
FELIX:
Yeah.
HENRY:
It's awesome.
SASHA:
That's really cool. Wow.
FATHER:
You spot instantly
during this--
[knocking]
Jeremy, can you put it
in the fixer, please?
[footsteps approaching]
How did it go?
- Hmm?
FATHER:
How did it go?
- What do you mean?
It was terrible,
but what is this?
What are you doing?
You're not working.
Where is--where are
the children?
- I was showing them something
in the darkroom.
It seems like
you don't really see
that we are
in a crisis somehow.
FATHER: So...
Badly, I guess.
[Mother sighs]
Did they have any advice
this time?
[Mother scoffs]
- You can listen
to this whole thing.
- He let you record it?
[button clicks]
PSYCHIATRIST (ON TAPE):
It's difficult.
You're correct, yes.
It's not clear entirely
what's causing this disruptive
behavior,
even after meeting
with him several times.
MOTHER (ON TAPE): Can you say
what he was telling you or no?
PSYCHIATRIST (ON TAPE):
No, I can't tell you that.
But I can tell you
my professional opinion.
MOTHER (ON TAPE):
You mean a diagnosis?
PSYCHIATRIST (ON TAPE):
I know that's
what you're after,
but a diagnosis is not always
as helpful as you might think.
MOTHER (ON TAPE):
You don't have one?
PSYCHIATRIST (ON TAPE):
[scoffs]
While areas of weakness
have been identified
in his learning abilities,
they do not alone
seem sufficient enough
to account for the level
of social difficulty,
the relationship issues,
the adaptive-living issues
you reported to me.
As far as a diagnosis
is concerned,
I would really only feel
confident
in suggesting
that Jeremy has signs
of what we would call
oppositional defiant disorder.
MOTHER (ON TAPE):
What is this?
PSYCHIATRIST (ON TAPE):
It's what it sounds like--
PSYCHIATRIST (ON TAPE):
That somewhere along the line,
he decided that he's the boss.
And you just have to show him,
and I mean really show him,
that that's not the case.
You are the boss.
[Father snorts]
[button clicks]
FATHER: Sasha.
You're too old for this now.
And too big.
- Aw, but I can't sleep.
MOTHER:
Oh, you.
[TV switching on]
MAN (ON TV):
I'll slide this off.
It's so flavorful.
WOMAN (ON TV):
Look at that, folks. That is--
- We are having now,
um, a girls' night.
- Well, am I kicked out?
- Uh-huh.
Sasha, Miss Mousey, and me,
we're sleeping here.
You can sleep in her bed.
FATHER:
Ay, ay, ay.
SASHA: Bye.
- Good night.
FATHER:
Night, night.
HOST (ON TV): I'm going
to take the spit rod.
And you forget about it.
WOMAN (ON TV): You just
set it and then forget it.
WOMAN 2 (ON TV):
You just set it and forget it.
WOMAN 3 (ON TV):
Set it and forget about it.
MAN (ON TV):
You set it and forget it.
AUDIENCE (ON TV):
Set it and forget it.
[Father shushing]
[indistinct chatter on TV]
EMMA: Oh, no.
Can I run through it?
[squealing]
SASHA: Let's keep it going.
It's going so fast.
Guys, look
how fast it's going!
[children shouting happily]
Wait, she's gonna pick it up
and pop it this time.
Emma!
Drop it!
Okay, okay, okay.
[children scream happily]
Pick it up.
EMMA: Pick it up.
CHILDREN:
Three, two--
[all screaming happily]
EMMA: Everyone try to get me.
SASHA: Okay.
EMMA:
Not yet, not yet!
Now, now.
[children screaming happily]
[vehicle approaching]
[vehicle door opens, closes]
FATHER:
Can you hold this for me?
[vehicle door opens, closes]
[knock on door]
[footsteps approaching,
door opens]
POLICE OFFICER:
Ma'am, is this your son?
He gave us this address.
MOTHER:
Yes.
POLICE OFFICER: Your son
was caught shoplifting.
We apprehended him
in the parking lot.
MOTHER: Okay. Can--you--
can you take off these--these--
POLICE OFFICER:
He'll need to appear in court.
- Man, talk to me!
What's happening?
[objects clatter]
Are you out of your mind?
Calm down. Stop it.
Talk to me.
Hey. Talk to me.
JEREMY:
Get away from me!
Get away from me!
FATHER: Stop it. Calm down.
Calm down.
Calm.
[mouse clicking]
[King Crimson's
"I Talk to the Wind" plays]
- Said the straight man
To the late man
Where have you been?
I've been here,
and I've been there
And I've been in between
I talk to the wind
My words are
all carried away
- Can I try?
- Yeah.
- I talk to the wind
The wind does not hear
The wind cannot hear
I'm on the outside
looking inside
SASHA: Whoa.
MOTHER: Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
And...
we are putting it here.
SASHA: Like this?
MOTHER: Yeah. Like...
Yes.
SASHA:
Can Emma come over for dinner?
MOTHER:
Um...
I don't know. I-I...
I think it's not a good idea.
So I'm really very, very happy
that you are making friends,
and you can go
to their houses anytime.
But, um...
I-I don't want you
to feel embarrassed...
because what
is happening here, you know?
SASHA:
I'm not embarrassed.
MOTHER: But you don't know
what people are saying.
So it--you know,
it feels natural for you,
but it shouldn't.
SASHA:
What do you mean?
MOTHER: If Jeremy is
coming home by the police,
then people are talking
about it.
You know?
You--Yes, I think it's--
it's--it's better like this--
believe me--
to keep it separate, you know?
[sizzling]
[footsteps thudding overhead]
[door opens, slams]
- Jeremy!
- [sniffs]
[roof creaks]
MOTHER:
Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
FATHER:
Devil got into you?
Out of your mind?
Hey, stop this now, okay?
Come down.
MOTHER:
Jeremy, can you hear me?
Please, get down, please.
FATHER:
Jeremy.
MOTHER:
Jeremy...
look at me.
Look at me, please.
Jeremy.
Get down, please.
[distant siren wailing]
[water running]
[water stops]
[water splashing]
[insects chirping]
[glass shatters]
[gasps]
[distant dogs barking]
[door opens]
Jeremy...
what have you done?
[Jeremy breathing shakily]
[Mother shushing]
MEAN GIRL 1 (ON TV):
Oh, there she is.
She's such a loser.
MEAN GIRL 2 (ON TV):
I know.
What a geek.
[laughter]
Get lost!
WOMAN (ON TV): Words hurt.
Don't be a part of it.
NARRATOR (ON TV):
The North American house hippo
is found throughout Canada
and Eastern United States.
House hippos are
very timid creatures,
and they're rarely seen.
But they would defend
their territory if provoked.
They come out at night
to search for food, water,
materials for their nests.
The favorite foods
of the house hippo
are chips, raisins,
and the crumbs
from peanut butter on toast.
They build their nests
in bedroom closets,
using lost mittens,
dryer lint,
and bits of string.
The nests have to be
very soft and warm.
House hippos sleep
about 16 hours a day.
WOMAN (ON TV):
That looked really real.
But you knew it couldn't
be true, didn't you?
That's why it's good to think
about what you're watching
on TV
and ask questions,
kind of like you just did.
A message from Concerned
Children's Advertisers.
[door opens]
- Hi.
FATHER: Hello.
- I'm from Social Services.
We had scheduled a house visit.
- Yes.
- Thank you.
FATHER:
This way, please.
FAMILY SUPPORT WORKER:
I wanted to come by
and see how things are
with Jeremy.
MOTHER: Oh, we have moved
so many times.
And I always worry
what the neighbors
are thinking of us,
that maybe we are bad parents.
The thing is that now
in the last couple of days,
there were some, uh...
some moments were not that easy
with him again.
[trampoline creaking]
[indistinct chatter, laughter]
[creaking continues]
[somber music]
- She suggested...
Um...
to, um...
She takes him away.
And...
and I...
I said yes.
I just--I said yes.
MOTHER (ON PHONE):
It is like some big ping-pong.
The doctor says to talk
to the psychologist.
The psychologist says,
you need to call the police
when he's acting like this,
but the police do nothing.
ADULT SASHA:
Mm-hmm. I know.
MOTHER (ON PHONE):
I-I just can't get over this.
ADULT SASHA: Uh, I don't think
anyone expects you to.
It's a very complicated
situation.
And I think, you know,
you know that.
MOTHER (ON PHONE):
[sighs] I just worry
that if someone else had
him...
Maybe--you know,
maybe it was me.
It's my fault.
That maybe with someone else,
he could be a superstar.
[clacking]
- How are you all?
How are your days?
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
Thank you for meeting me.
Hi.
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
Hi. Come right in.
Hi.
Nice to meet you.
Hi.
Hi. Hi.
Nice to meet you.
[clears throat]
Hi.
SOCIAL WORKER: Hi.
SOCIAL WORKER 2: Hello.
ADULT SASHA:
How's everybody doing?
SOCIAL WORKER:
Good.
- As you can tell,
you're on camera.
And I'm a filmmaker,
here to present you
with a case file.
There is an eldest child
who's presenting issues
within the family,
some risk-taking behaviors,
and was assessed, treated,
evaluated
over the course of many years.
The family sort of rightfully
felt some frustrations
in--in their availability
to care.
And so I would love
to get a sense
of how you see this case
and assess it
and see how those options
are different now,
how the case might be handled
differently now.
SOCIAL WORKER:
How old was the--
how old was the child
when he first started
experiencing some
of these things?
ADULT SASHA: Um, I would say
there was an observation
of, um,
sort of behavioral concerns
at, like, three or four.
But 14, 15 years
was really around the time
things started escalating.
- Right.
ADULT SASHA: I have
some information here about--
that give some insight
into his goals.
- Sure.
ADULT SASHA: Uh...
I'll just read it to you here.
He describes the best time
of his life as,
"can't think of one."
He says the best thing
that could happen to him
would be to be rich and famous.
He feels the worst time
of his life was,
"when I got caught stealing
twice in a row."
He feels the worst thing
that could happen to him
would be to, "be like a junkie,
to have a life I don't like."
He describes his three
wishes as,
"to have something to travel
through time in the universe,
to have lots of money,
and be old enough to drive."
There are suggestions
of personality disorder.
And then there's sort of
a back-tracking of that.
So--so...
there's a lot of confusion,
I find, in the document itself
about how to assess
his well-being,
his sense of himself,
his sense of himself
when talking
to different professionals.
Um, but this is what we have
of how he felt.
Uh, I'm curious how that
changes anybody's perspective.
- The report talks a lot about
requiring considerable support.
Um, and I know that this is,
you know, 20 years ago.
I wonder what sort
of support was available
for this young person.
Now, I think us as
social workers, we see that--
fast-forward 20 years, there's
still not a lot of support
out there to help transition
these folks from crises
to stabilization
and--and going down a path
that's going to be, uh,
helpful and--and goal-oriented.
And so I can't imagine what
it looked like 20 years ago.
SOCIAL WORKER:
I mean, the piece that I read
about around having
a little bit of respite,
I think, sounds important,
provided that it's qualified
with it not being punitive.
I think that's
really important.
If this young man--he's
the eldest, you're saying,
just so I'm clear in terms
of the family history?
ADULT SASHA: Yes.
- He's the eldest.
And he is the result
of the mother's relationship
with another man.
And the younger three children
are the mother's relationship
with a different
biological father?
ADULT SASHA:
Yes, that's correct.
- So as the eldest--
And given what
I'm hearing here,
this whole family is in crisis.
They're feeling, I'm sure,
at their wits' end,
um, and probably
holding two things--
wanting to get their son help
and protect
their other children.
- Right, so the suggestion
would be to sort of, uh,
ask the family to implement
more of a structure
to involve and provide.
SOCIAL WORKER 2:
With support, you know?
ADULT SASHA:
Yeah.
- Because they're
not necessarily feeling good
about him.
So how does--
how do we change that
and using things
he's interested in?
ADULT SASHA:
Yeah.
- And so sometimes,
voluntary placements
can be a good intervention
and then looking
towards reunifying the family,
and doing that work
to help reunify the family.
And sometimes it could, yeah,
create these voids
and vacuums
and more problems, right?
And often, um, it's hard to see
what the outcome's gonna be.
And the initial decision
is just made on--
is more made on,
okay, the here and now,
what's happening
intersectionally,
in terms of, like,
risk and--and danger
and best interest of the child,
whatever that means.
And so, um--
so it's hard to predict.
And I've seen it,
in the instances
that I have been involved with,
go quite well
and not go so well.
It's just hard to say.
- Hmm.
[solemn music]
SOCIAL WORKER (ON LAPTOP):
Simple, straight-up assurance
is such a strong currency,
just providing
that reassurance
to--to the parents
that, okay, you're feeling
a vortex of things right now,
and it's okay.
Similar to what we're training
the parents
to teach the child--
it's okay that you're feeling
those things
without feeling these things.
And this is why
you're feeling them.
And you have every right
to feel these things.
And I think even just
that currency of reassurance
can just maybe--just maybe
help them take that breather
and try again,
try again tomorrow.
[audio warbling]
MOTHER:
She suggested...
Um, to...
Um...
[wind gusting]
WOMAN (ON TV):
I'm getting married, Walter,
and I'm also getting
as far away
from the newspaper business
as I can get.
MAN (ON TV):
What?
WOMAN (ON TV):
I am through.
MAN (ON TV): You can get mad
all you want to, Hildy,
but you can't quit
the newspaper business.
WOMAN (ON TV): Oh, why not?
MAN (ON TV): I know you.
I know what quitting
would mean to you.
WOMAN (ON TV):
And what would it mean?
MAN (ON TV):
It would k*ll you.
WOMAN (ON TV): You can't
sell me that, Walter Burns.
MAN (ON TV): Who says I can't?
You're a newspaperman.
WOMAN (ON TV):
That's why I'm quitting.
I want to go someplace
where I can be a woman.
MAN (ON TV):
You mean be a traitor.
WOMAN (ON TV):
A traitor to what?
MAN (ON TV):
A traitor to journalism.
You're a journalist, Hildy.
WOMAN (ON TV): A journalist?
Now, what does that mean?
Peeking through keyholes?
Chasing after fire engines?
Waking people up
in the middle of the night
to ask them if Hitler's
going to start another w*r?
ADULT SASHA:
Hecky?
Ready?
Yeah.
I've been working
on, um, a project
that looks back
at my time with my family
and that period
of time in my life.
And, um...
I thought of you
because you, in many ways,
are the key to those memories.
And I'm just so grateful
to talk to you about it.
It's funny
because I remember these...
more feelings,
these moments of chaos.
And then I remember moments
that, you know,
were not so disruptive, um...
not so--not so dramatic.
And I remember Jeremy being
you know, as sweet
as he was unpredictable.
So it's very hard to--
to square some of my memories
sometimes of that time.
BONNIE (ON LAPTOP):
You know, he...
he certainly was struggling.
And, you know, that was,
I think,
why your parents reached out
for as much help as they did,
because he just--he really--
yeah, I don't--
I just--you know,
your mom, in particular,
just didn't know what to do or
where to get the help for him.
ADULT SASHA: Yeah.
BONNIE (ON LAPTOP): Such a--
I really had a lot of respect
for your parents
and everything
that they were trying to do
to raise you
and your brothers.
ADULT SASHA:
Mm.
BONNIE (ON LAPTOP):
In many families,
they hit a breaking point,
and it becomes unsafe
not just for that person
that is going to move
into a home--a foster home,
but it becomes unsafe for
the other people in the home,
and it's
a very difficult decision.
So...
ADULT SASHA: Yeah.
BONNIE (ON LAPTOP): He had
some pretty unique behaviors,
and they were really upsetting
for your mom.
She was always very worried
about...
you know,
where that would lead,
and disappointed
in the services and support
and answers that she got.
She didn't get answers
that really made sense
or that were supportive.
ADULT SASHA: Yeah.
BONNIE (ON LAPTOP): He
didn't have a lot of friends.
And when he would come
out of his room,
he just had the ability
to just take whatever
was happening in the room
and just upset it and spin it.
And, you know,
he demanded a lot of attention
in that moment.
And so I do remember
that he would have gasoline
in his room.
He just would have it--
not very much,
but he would have some
in his room.
And I remember your mom
being so scared,
because he had made this
threat that he was going
to burn the house down
with everybody in it.
I can't even imagine, as your
parents, being in the house,
you know, knowing that
that threat has been made
and there are things in place
that could make it happen
in a split second.
You know, that's something
I always wondered,
you know, is maybe why
he didn't get a diagnosis.
But we'll never know.
We'll never know, you know,
the truth, I don't think.
It's really hard
to sort of sort that through.
Um...
but he...
The character that I saw,
the person that I saw
certainly demonstrated
or looked like someone
who was really suffering,
who was really struggling,
who was really...
alone and isolated and...
invested in...
yeah, invested in the chaos,
really invested in the chaos.
I hope someday
to be able to, you know, be
in the presence
of your parents again.
They're both
very strong people.
They're very resilient,
you know?
And I have a lot of respect
for them, for sure.
So I hope someday that
I cross paths with them, too.
- [crying]
[breathes deeply]
[exhales deeply]
[door opens]
[engine turning over]
[soft classical music playing
on car stereo]
[music growing louder]
[child speaking indistinctly]
[boat engine rumbling]
[music stops]
[phone beeps]
[children chattering
indistinctly]
[woman speaking indistinctly]
- Hello.
- Hi.
Uh...
- You're from
social services, yes?
- Yes, sorry, that's right.
It's nice to meet you.
FATHER:
This way, please.
ADULT SASHA: Do you mind
if I look around first?
FATHER:
Yeah, that's fine.
Miss Mousey.
ADULT SASHA:
Mm.
ELMER FUDD (ON TV):
[chuckles]
First we will hear a waltz
written by Johann Strauss.
[boing]
[chuckles] And as we hear
the "whythmic stwains"
of the haunting "wefwain,"
"wisten" to the whistling
"whythm" of the woodwinds
as it "wolls awound
and awound"
and comes out here.
[boing]
[fabric ripping,
Elmer Fudd chuckles]
[waltz playing on tv]
[Adult Sasha sniffling]
[child giggles]
[door opens, closes]
[Gandharvas'
"The First Day of Spring"]
- Come on out
Don't just sit there
catatonic
I'm feeling supersonic
The warm wind
is sweeping by
The sun's full in the sky
And there's
no way of knowing
No way to know
ADULT SASHA:
Can I turn this light on?
FATHER:
Yes, it's okay now.
[switch clicks]
[switch clicks]
ADULT SASHA: Hi.
MOTHER: Hi.
ADULT SASHA:
It's nice to meet you.
MOTHER: Nice to meet you, too.
FATHER: Please, have a seat.
ADULT SASHA:
Thank you.
Hi.
MOTHER:
Hi, hello.
ADULT SASHA:
Um...
how are you both doing?
MOTHER:
Yeah...
we are fine, thanks.
ADULT SASHA:
How are things with Jeremy?
MOTHER:
You can talk, too, you know?
- Yes, I will.
But, please, you start.
- Um...
[sighs]
It feels like...
somehow, I'm cursed.
He's...
so troubled.
We tried everything...
[inhales deeply]
Mm, therapy...
special school, homeschooling.
It didn't work.
He doesn't want to listen
to anybody.
Not us, not any adult
could ever control him.
Mm...
he was six years old
when one day something
happened with his eyes.
You can tell this, no?
- We were playing catch
with a ball,
just back and forth and...
When, suddenly,
he could not catch it anymore.
I would throw it
for him, and...
his hands would cross the air
in front of him.
But he just could not see
the ball anymore.
It was something very strange,
but his eyes
just suddenly went crossed.
It was very bizarre, and...
and I think it scared him.
It scared us, too, of course.
- Yeah.
So I don't know.
[inhales deeply]
This is one of the unlucky
things that comes to my mind.
Mm, he had to get
these big glasses
with such a very young age.
And I think because of this
and from his accent
at the beginning...
mm, the kids at the school
were not nice to him.
ADULT SASHA:
You mean he was picked on?
- Yes.
ADULT SASHA: Did he talk
to either of you about this?
- Mm, he...
He doesn't care
about what others saying
about him.
He never cared about...
making friends.
He just--
he likes to be the clown...
to everyone.
He was always like this.
ADULT SASHA: And how is he
with his siblings?
- Mm, sometimes
he's really nasty with them,
but sometimes
he's--he's very sweet.
Mm.
ADULT SASHA: Why do you think
he's like this?
[Father sighs]
- He's uncontrollable,
completely.
He's doing really big
and risky things.
And he can hurt himself or...
others.
And he doesn't care
if he's getting caught.
So one day,
he stole a bicycle from a yard.
And he came home
totally beaten up,
and his face was blue.
I don't know
what he was thinking.
And he told me
it was just for fun.
I don't know what--
What is he thinking?
And...
and he's stealing from us.
- We can't keep any money
where he can find it.
He takes whatever he sees.
Sometimes he's taking things
from the house
and brings them to the pawn
shop just to get a few dollars.
He would even steal
from his siblings.
- Yeah, he thinks that he's...
some kind of gangster guy.
He tried to sell fake drugs
to some boys on the street
at 14 years old.
I...
So we can't...
we can't tell him anything.
He doesn't listen to us.
Grounding, rules--nothing.
ADULT SASHA: Is it true
that he once threatened
to burn the house down?
- Yeah, I know he hates me.
- What should we do now?
That's what
we need to know, yeah?
What are we supposed to do?
ADULT SASHA:
From what I understand,
the best option
would be something
called voluntary placement.
MOTHER: Voluntary placement,
what does it mean, exactly?
ADULT SASHA:
It means he would be placed
with a foster family,
essentially.
FATHER:
Uh, I'm sorry.
T-this is a very hard thing
for us to hear.
I-I'm sure you understand,
we are trying so hard
for--for so many years
with Jeremy.
[Mother speaking Hungarian]
MOTHER:
I need some water.
ADULT SASHA:
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to upset her.
- It's okay.
Uh...
We're just both so exhausted
from all of this.
And we feel like
there is no good options left.
[cup thuds on table]
- Have you ever heard...
about a family like this?
How come...
[Father sighs]
Nobody has to give
their children away?
Just alcohol addicts
or people are beating
their children.
I don't understand why.
ADULT SASHA:
I wish I had a better answer.
FATHER: What if we try this,
just for a little while?
Maybe if he goes away,
he can do better.
And then he comes home.
MOTHER:
Could we see him still?
- [sniffles]
[sniffles]
You will see him again.
You will try many, many times
to keep him at home.
You will do everything
in your power to help him.
[sniffles]
It will consume you entirely.
You won't give up.
But you will get tired
as the years go on and on.
[sniffles]
He will go to foster care,
but it will be
a temporary solution.
You will doubt yourself
as a parent...
and, at times, your life.
You will begin to close
yourself from the world.
[sniffles]
No one will understand.
And it will only worsen.
He, himself,
will have no explanation...
[sniffles]
Other than he cannot manage.
You will beg for change
and solutions.
He will grow into an adult...
[sniffles]
And the help he needs,
he will not get.
It won't get better.
Countless professionals
will come in
and out of your life.
But it won't change.
[sniffles]
Despite what you know
of him and yourself...
you will lose him.
[sniffles]
[door opens]
[waltz playing on tv]
SOCIAL WORKER:
This does not have to be
a permanent solution.
It could also be
a temporary one as well.
MOTHER:
To--to send him...
to a-a totally
stranger family...
Do you think that--
[ambient music]
ADULT SASHA: Did you have
a friend named Elijah?
JEREMY:
Mm-hmm.
ADULT SASHA: How come
I don't remember that?
JEREMY: I think there's
a lot you don't remember.
- "Dear Sasha...
I grew up
with your brother Jeremy."
"We were never really close,
"but he was one of the most
memorable of my friends
from school."
"In grade ten,
we were suspended together
"for stealing from lockers.
"That's a long story, but...
Jeremy wasn't really involved."
"Even though I took the blame,
Jeremy still got in trouble.
And I felt pretty bad
about that."
"He invited me over
to hang out one time,
"and he showed me his maps
of towns and cities.
They remain some of the most
unique art I've seen."
"I would sometimes see him out
with people who were not
very good influences."
"I was really unsure
how to help."
"I began seeing less
and less of him."
"After high school,
I didn't see much of him,
but I would think
of him often."
"Recently, I tried
to look him up on Facebook
but couldn't find anything."
"But I came across you...
and your films."
"That's where I learned
about his passing."
"I am so very sorry
for your loss."
"I saw in your film
what you said
"about being angry at Jeremy...
and your regrets
about that now."
"I also have a brother
who I've been angry with
for most of my life."
"I just wanted to share
my memories of your brother
"and that I always knew him
as a special soul
who had a kind heart."
[seagulls crying]
[distant boat horn blowing]
[Daniel Johnston's "Some
Things Last a Long Time"]
- Your picture
Is still
On my wall
On my wall
The colors
Are bright
Bright
As ever
The red is strong
The blue is pure
Some things last
A long time
Some things last
A long time
Your picture
Is still
On my wall
On my wall
I think
About you
Often
Often
I won't forget
All the things we did
Some things last
A long time
Some things last
A long time
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Blue Heron (2025)
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