07x19 - The Meatball Party

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ MTV ♪

- Beep beep! [screaming]

[upbeat music]

[air horn bellows]

- Party's here.

b*tch has still got it.

- I recognize today as "Jersey Shore" Day.

- Yeah, buddy!

- f*ck off, Sam. f*cking b*tch.

- What?

- I feel like I'm talking to a child who just had a tantrum.

- b*tch bought a $, house because of me.

- Welcome to Nashville, mama.

- Yes.

Yeah!

- What do you want me to do? - Watch me poop.

- No. - Cool.

- What's up? - Hey, Ron.

- Hi.

- Hey. How are you?

- Going on a vacation with your ex is not ideal.

- Ronnie. Nice to meet you. - Justin.

- Awkward.

- I'm , you know?

- You're ready to settle down?

- I want a girlfriend.

- We just have to find him somebody that's okay

with their boyfriend taking a shower on stage.

- Oh!

- Are you friends with her?

- Sam?

No, you're allowed to do a f*cking TikTok,

and I can't do what the f*ck--

- No, you can be a shitty person and DM fan pages.

f*ck you, b*tch. - f*ck off.

- This Sam and Angelina, are they married?

- Oh, no, no. They're just roommates.

- Just friends.

[all screaming]

[groaning]

[all screaming]

- We have one last thing to do,

find out the gender of our baby.

[blasting]

- [screams] Let's go!

[yelling]

- Whoa!

You were using her. - [screams]

- Oh. - Oh, my God.

- You're a psycho. - What is funny about that?

- Get off your high horse.

- We're back, Miami!

- He was grinding with multiple women.

- This is gonna be bad.

[upbeat music]

- Yeah, buddy!

- Party's here!

- The Situation is under construction.

- We're so classy now.

- On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

- Get the frig out of here, you crazy!

- Um, hello?

- I'm still the sweetest b*tch you'll ever meet.

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

- There's a cat staring at us through the window right now.

No, Angelina, no.

There's too many in this house as it is.

♪ ♪

Meilani, your glasses just came in.

- This is not the right prescription.

I feel dizzy.

- But you look fabulous.

- ♪ We taking over ♪

- Romeo, are you ready for baby number three?

No? All right.

Oh, my God, we got a flat tire.

- Yeah, buddy. - Get in bed, please.

- [farts]

- ♪ Head to toe, I'm designer ♪

- Is that a deodorant stain?

♪ ♪

- I got some dinner.

- Oh, thank you.

- Did you go to the doctors today?

- Yeah, I had to get bloodwork.

- Oh, that's the worst.

- So much has been going on in my life.

Tonight, I could start my shots.

- Oh, yeah? - Yes.

- You're gonna sh**t yourself?

- Yes.

I've basically been going down that process of IVF

so I can get pregnant with Justin.

Usually, I feel like I'd be like,

I need to get married and, like, whatever.

But I'm so secure in this relationship

that for me, it's not my priority to get married.

I'm getting older.

Like, I'm gonna be next month.

And every year you get older, your eggs diminish.

So for me, I just want to do what we have to do now,

before it's too late with having children.

Why do we have to wait two years to get married,

and then what? - No.

- Then, what, I bite myself in the a*s?

I'm gonna be, like, .

And then-- - Yeah.

- What if I can't have kids by then?

I come from a very large Italian family.

My sister has four kids.

My other sister has one kid.

And I always, like, dreamt of having kids

so they can grow up together with their cousins

and be close.

Like, I just have dreams of having a family one day.

- Are you excited? - Yeah.

Are you? - Mm-hmm.

Are you thinking about names?

- No. - Not yet?

- I don't like to talk about it until it happens,

because you know, the history and everything.

My uterus has gone through a lot.

I suffer from endometriosis.

It's scar tissue, basically, that grows on your uterus.

And because I just have this issue,

it's harder for me to get pregnant.

I don't want to tell, like, anybody, like, in the group,

just 'cause, you know, like,

I don't know if I can carry a baby.

So I don't want to tell people and then have,

like, the heartbreak of, hey,

I can't get preg-- we can't get pregnant.

- Yeah.

- My biggest fear is not being able to get pregnant one day.

Hold on.

So that's also why I don't want anybody to know.

Like, I'm surprised I'm doing this, because, like,

that's very private.

And, like, it would be such a huge letdown.

[somber music]

It's just, like, a lot.

It's a lot.

♪ ♪

- There's nothing you can do.

You just got to hope for the best and, you know--

- Yeah. - Things will happen.

- I feel really lucky that I have Justin.

He makes me feel very secure,

and he makes me feel really loved.

And I think that is so nice.

And I just--it makes me want to have his kid even more.

I'm like, damn it.

- So how long do you have to do the shots and stuff?

- Like, two weeks, I think. - Mm.

- I have to, like, psych myself.

Like, all right, you're gonna do this.

- I'll help you.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

- Aw.

[gentle music]

♪ ♪

I have to inject, like, IUs.

- Do you need to watch the video on this one, too?

- Yeah, I just got to look at the video,

and then I should be okay.

- Twist the blue and yellow sections to separate.

- Okay, pause it.

This whole process is way more intense than,

like, you can ever think.

Looks clear, right?

- -.

- Did you just - me?

I thought, we're gonna go to the doctors,

and they're gonna insert whatever,

and we're gonna be pregnant like that.

And that's just not how it works at all.

- All right, now release

and then plunge it in.

- I have to take hormones and shots for two weeks

so they get your eggs nice and juicy and thick,

and then they'll basically take your eggs out,

introduce it to the sperm.

They fertilize, become an embryo.

And then they will transfer it into my uterus,

where, hopefully, it sticks to me and I get pregnant.

This sucks. [video playing]

- All right, now, where's the cap for the needle?

- I'll do it. Just don't come near me...

- Where's the cap? - Because I don't want

to stab you. [clattering]

[laughs]

- ♪ In your mind, I know we're through ♪

- What the f*ck?

- ♪ But I just can't get used to never ♪

- [sighs] So the heater's not working.

- Hey.

- Do I do a factory reset?

- Maybe. [laughs]

- Come on.

- Where is Vin?

- I don't know. Why don't you tell me?

Since Tucson, it's been an up-and-down

roller coaster between me and Vin.

- So you're home alone?

- Yeah, he's a nomad.

One time, he didn't come home for two weeks,

and he admitted that he wanted to work

because he didn't want to be around me.

Remember Christmas? He f*cking left me,

and he went to his mother's house.

And then I was home by myself on Christmas.

- You've told me he's just, like,

always missing, never there helping.

- Year number two.

He's always gone.

This morning, he left the house,

and he was at the gym for four hours.

I don't know what the f*ck is going on.

It's a little f*cking weird.

- It's not normal.

- It's embarrassing.

I mean, I've been avoiding the roommates

because I don't want to talk about it.

Right now, . and I are just working on things

and trying to figure out where we go from here.

I literally bought this house thinking that I was gonna

have a family in this house,

thinking this was gonna be my forever home.

Like, I see, like, school buses pulling up

in front of the f*cking house at : a.m. every morning,

and I get upset, because I'm like,

oh, look, that could be my kid going on a bus.

Like, something's f*cking wrong with me picking men.

[somber music]

- ♪ She's a good girl, she's my best friend ♪

♪ She's my bubble gum pop and rolling ♪

♪ She's a good girl ♪

- Thank you.

- ♪ She bring the rainbow when it's raining ♪

- Oh, my goodness, she still has her Christmas stuff up?

It's, like, Valentine's Day.

Meatball? - Hi.

- I figured the kids are in school, so let me stop by...

- Yeah. - See how my meatball's doing.

- Same, I got a lot of sh*t going on,

always traveling with Sissy and then the kids.

Lorenzo was wrestling, so it's a lot.

- I feel like you're traveling a lot.

- Yeah, I'm tired.

Oh, Rocky, you're blocking the shot.

[dog whimpers] - Oh, my God.

I've been throwing parties left and right.

I had the Halloween party.

I did Christmas. - Your New Year's.

- New Year's Eve.

But I miss everyone.

We have to plan something to get us all together.

- Let's do a party.

- I would love to throw a nice party.

- It should be a theme.

- Why don't we make it meatballs?

- Meatballs?

- Yeah, it should be a contest.

- Who has got the best ba*ls?

- Yeah. - Fun.

[phone rings]

- Nicole's calling me.

- Hey, fam.

- Hey, hey. What's up?

- It's the meatballs.

- What's happening, guys?

- So we have an idea.

- Oh, God.

- Me and Deena are gonna throw

a BYOB party.

- Bring Your Own Booze?

- No, Bring Your Own...

both: ba*ls!

- What?

- Oh, my God.

- No, meatballs. Bring your own meatballs.

- Ohh.

- The meatballs are throwing a meatball party?

- Yeah, but it's not just a party.

- We're gonna do an entire competition.

- Challenge accepted.

- But it's not how much you could eat, Mike.

- Everybody is bringing their own ba*ls.

And whoever's taste the best wins a trophy.

- So we're all gonna put each other's ba*ls in our mouth

when I get to your house?

- Yes. - Yeah.

- So make sure you come on an empty stomach,

'cause we're eating a lot of ba*ls.

- Okay. Well, I like eating ba*ls.

- Don't tempt me with a good time.

- Count me in, ladies. - I'm excited.

It's gonna be fun.

- Let me see what I can cook up.

- All right, we can't wait to taste your ba*ls.

- All right, guys. I will see you soon.

- Bye. - Bye.

- Oh, my God.

- This will be fun.

Who doesn't like ba*ls in your mouth?

[laughs]

- What's this?

- I just want to see if I have siblings

and what they look like. - [gasps]

- Never heard of a Jamaican cooking Italian.

- She's back. - I am back.

- Hi. - It's uncontrollable.

- Oh, really?

- It's literally disruptive to my life.

- Have you spoken to anybody?

- ♪ I think we're living our best life, best life ♪

♪ So ooh, this is our best life ♪

[cheering]

♪ I think we're living our best life ♪

- It's been a few months since the release of my book,

"Reality Check: How I Overcame Addiction, Loss, and Prison."

- Loved it. Loved you.

What a beautiful soul. Beautiful story.

- Oh, my God. You're gonna make me cry.

I've been touring the country, doing book signings.

- It's inspirational on so many different levels.

- You know, I can relate to going through trials

and tribulations. - Oh, hell yeah.

- I just couldn't put it down.

- Listen, that is the biggest compliment.

- Sober a year this fall. - Ah, man.

For that one, man, come here.

Come on. Sober a year.

Come on, now.

The book is doing amazing.

I'm now known as The Publication.

- Can you sign my book for me, please?

- Oh, my God.

What are you doing here?

I've been really touched by all the support

that most of the roomies have given me

throughout my big book launch.

There he is. What's up? - What's up, man?

- Yeah, it was a really pleasant surprise...

- Oh, of course. - That you came out, man.

- Of course. - I'll be honest with you.

- I am definitely proud of Mike.

To be on top of the world and then lose everything,

this is gonna give hope to people

that are going through things that they need to overcome.

Have you been inspiring people with addiction?

- It's definitely people that are suffering from addiction,

but also people suffering from mental health issues,

depression, anxiety, overcoming obstacles.

You know, the book is definitely--

- Everybody has their own issues.

- You, um, continuing the therapy?

- Yeah. I've been doing it for about two months.

I've had an anxiety disorder my whole life.

- What do you feel?

- Anxious. Not myself.

- Loss of breath and all that kind of stuff?

- Yeah, like a real attack.

My brain just doesn't work anymore, dude.

I can't think. I can't sleep.

Bro, I can't [bleep] function.

- There is an out right now. Relax.

- And sometimes it's manageable,

and sometimes it's literally, like, disruptive to my life.

- No one is ever % all the time.

- No. That's what I had to learn.

There was a time recently that it was really strong.

And I'm like, you know, I just need a therapist to talk to.

And that's helping me just live with it.

It's like a tool to... - Yes.

- Better myself. - No one is perfect.

We're all doing our best. - Yeah.

- That's it. - Yeah.

And everyone's going through their own sh*t.

- Exactly.

- I think that a lot of people could benefit from therapy,

and I want to share that with people

to hopefully help them get through things.

- So what's happening with-- uh, with everyone else?

Have you spoken to anybody?

- Uh, just as much as you have, pretty much.

- Yeah. I speak to you every day.

I speak to Pauly. I speak to Nicole.

I speak to JWOWW.

And to be honest with you, Angelina,

there's been really nothing.

When we left the last vacation, I did have,

like, a nice conversation with Angelina to let her know,

we're always gonna be there for you.

You're the sister we never knew we needed.

- I love that.

- You raise your hand, we'll be here.

And-- - Nothing.

- Since then, there's been really nothing.

She doesn't reach out.

She doesn't call back.

She didn't get a book.

- Wow. - Um, yeah, exactly.

I'm hurt, to be honest with you.

I've been a good friend to Angelina for a very long time.

I've supported her through thick and thin,

but now I feel like it's one-sided.

I put the effort in to be your friend,

and I just want that to be reciprocated.

And she just ghosts everybody for, like, six months.

- Yeah. Wow. - I'm sick of it.

I just feel that myself and Angelina

have gone in separate directions.

She also went below the belt

and "besmudged" me on social media,

and I didn't appreciate that.

So it's time for me to do something different.

It's just, like, one thing after another.

She just hasn't been a good friend,

so she was not invited

to Mia Bella's first birthday party.

- Oh.

Ah, no.

I get going the tough love route

to see if maybe excluding her will wake her up a little bit.

But this is not gonna be well received from Angelina.

- But I'm tired of doing the same thing every single year.

She hasn't spoken to us.

I'm drawing a line in the sand.

Something's got to give.

- ♪ Maybe I'm a bit anxious ♪

♪ Maybe I'm entertaining ♪

♪ Maybe I'm not okay ♪

- Yay.

Today is a really big day.

Mia Bella is turning one year old.

We got to use Uncle Pauly's stuff,

'cause that doesn't move.

We invited all our family, all our friends.

And we're gonna have a massive celebration for her.

Thank you.

That was great.

- I'm gonna turn the car on.

- You got to get the kids loaded, honey.

- All right. Sit down, mister. Come on.

[baby crying]

- We got to go, honey.

- ♪ Makes me wanna throw up ♪

♪ Makes me wanna throw up ♪

- The girls are on their way.

Sam's bringing Justin.

JWOWW's bringing Zack.

Vinny couldn't come. Pauly couldn't come.

- That's okay. - But I'll be honest with you.

I didn't send out the invite to Angelina.

- No, you don't want that energy.

I can't deal with any kind of negativity

or any kind of drama or energy at this stage of my pregnancy.

So I kind of agree with him,

that she probably shouldn't be at this event.

- If you're not being a good friend,

I'm gonna put up a boundary.

And I have every right to.

- Agreed.

- [gasps] We're here.

- Yeah.

- Check out everything.

We have the dessert table. - So cute.

- ♪ I've got the blessings, I've got the best things ♪

- In the Italian culture, the baby's first birthday,

we do it big, all the decorations,

the food that's coming out, the DJ, Mia Bella's dress.

I mean, it looks like a wedding.

[laughing] I said it looks like a wedding.

- This is your party.

- ♪ I'm a trendsetter, what do you do ♪

♪ I make the rules, yeah, I make them debut ♪

- Come on, sweetie. Just run in.

Run, run, run, run, run. It's freezing.

Go.

- Why is it so much colder here?

- The ocean.

- Well, f*ck the ocean.

- Hey!

- Hi. - Oh, my God.

Look at this.

- Hi, baby.

- Cameron, don't throw the ball.

- This is so cute in here. - Hey.

- Thanks for inviting me. - Yo, thanks for coming.

[phone dings] - Nicole's gonna be late

because her Uber Tesla had to get recharged.

- Oh, my God.

[upbeat music]

- I feel like a d*ck because I don't like

to be late for, like, my friends' occasions.

Sorry I'm so late. - Oh, my God, stop it.

- I didn't know that you have to charge your Tesla

or, it, like, breaks down.

- Who picks you up and then says,

I have to go charge my car?

- He was like, I'm not gonna make it,

so we need to stop and charge.

I feel like Teslas are robots.

I'm not into this new-age sh*t.

[phone trilling]

- Yeah. What's up, family?

- Hey, Pauly. - What's up?

- She's over there.

Even though Pauly is super busy,

he always checks in.

- Aw. Naw, man.

I know you got a busy schedule.

I do think that Angelina can take

a page out of Pauly's book.

Thank you so much for sending a gift.

You are definitely missed out here.

He always gives the extra mile, and that's what really matters.

- So where's Vinny?

- He texted me that he couldn't make it.

- It was something to do with family,

but all the girls are here.

- Not all the girls are here.

- Yes.

- Ooh, is there tea on it, or does she--

- Not really.

She blocked me, like, a month or so ago.

I just woke up one day, and I was blocked.

I don't know what's going on.

- I think I'm still blocked.

I don't know.

- You're % blocked.

- Every week, she's deleting her social media and,

you know, kicking out her fiancé.

I mean, listen, I really wish things were different.

She's definitely going through it,

but I don't want that to be a part

of my-- my baby's first birthday.

So I'm gonna just put a healthy boundary there,

and hopefully she works through her own stuff, you know?

- Yeah. - Yeah.

- I just want to stay clear.

- Same.

- You know, whatever goes on with Mike and Angelina

has nothing to do with me.

But I'm a little nervous.

The meatball party is coming up, and none of us

want to see this turn into a full blowout.

- I'm just giving her some space right now.

Hopefully, whatever she's going through, she figures it out.

I don't know. - That's fair.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Everyone's there but me.

Wow.

- [indistinct]

- Why don't you look at it for yourself, and you let me know?

- Oh, damn. Nice.

When was that? Is that old?

- No, this is new. - sh*t.

It looks nice.

Everyone looks good.

Mia Bella's Winter Wonderland.

Oh, it's for her birthday, right?

- Why are we not there? - I don't know.

- What the f*ck? What's going on?

Is it something I did?

Angelina wasn't invited to Mia Bella's birthday.

- Maybe our invitation got lost in the mail.

- No. It didn't get lost in the mail.

I was one of the first roommates

to meet your child, Mike.

Look how cute and tiny. - Oh, my God.

- Hi, baby. - He's tall.

- How precious. - Yeah.

- Does she poop a lot?

Why was I not invited?

Talk about a slap in the face.

What an as*h*le.

- It's something you should bring up.

- This is who--

oh, of course I'm gonna bring this up.

[country music]

- ♪ Woo-hoo ♪

[rooster crows]

- Let's see if we got any eggs today.

Ooh, this is liquid gold right here.

[rooster crows]

We call that one Cluck Norris right there.

All right.

Farm to table.

We're making meatballs today, baby.

Honey, fresh eggs from the backyard.

- Oh. - We will need these.

[upbeat music]

- Meatballs is my specialty.

I would make them with my grandma.

That's how I learned.

Garlic and onion is, like, the base of every Italian dish.

- I'm super excited for the meatball party.

My secret ingredient, sugar.

- Yay!

- I don't even think I have any meatball recipes.

f*cking meatball sh*t.

[clattering]

If cat hair gets in a meatball or two, sorry.

♪ ♪

- Wow. Look at this.

The roomies are gonna be really impressed by my meatballs

that I made all by myself.

[dramatic musical sting]

- Okay.

- Come on. I'm not making my own meatballs.

- Can I just-- - Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. My arm's tired.

Sub.

My mom, to meatballs, is like what Walter White was to meth.

- A little secret. You got to use bread.

- Mm-hmm. - Now, see the cheese?

You can't be cheap with the cheese.

I put a lot of onion, because it makes it sweet.

Then we're gonna do the garlic.

- It's like having a cheat code.

I'm sure if I really put my mind to it,

I can figure it out.

- Go ahead. - Cut it?

- You know how to cut an onion, right?

- Yeah.

- No, you got to take the peel off.

- Oh, oh.

You didn't see that.

[upbeat music]

- ♪ I gotta hit the beat ♪

♪ Oh, I gotta hit the beat ♪

- What are you making? - Meatball sliders.

Everybody else is gonna be making traditional meatballs,

so I have to switch it up and make it a little bit different.

- So how are you feeling from this weekend?

- I feel like people don't really understand

what goes into it, unless you, like,

do it. - Mm-hmm.

- The shots and stuff was a lot.

- You go very slow.

- Okay.

- Party time. - Oh, my God.

IVF is not easy.

I'm definitely putting myself through a lot.

I'm glad that part's over with. - Me too.

I felt bad for you. - I feel bad for you.

You had to deal with my craziness. [laughs]

I just got off all these hormones

from the egg retrieval, and that is putting me

in, like, a menopausal stage.

Like, yesterday, you know,

I wasn't, like, feeling that great.

- Yeah, it's, like, a lot.

- Headaches, hot flashes, mood swings, depression.

Like, all these things are happening to me right now.

Like, poor Justin. [laughs]

Honestly, I feel so bad for him.

- I'm used to it.

I'm just kidding.

So what's the next? - We just wait

and have to see if we create an embryo, so I don't know.

- It's a waiting game, I guess, right?

- Yeah.

It's hard, because my body is not like a normal body.

People that do struggle with endometriosis

have a harder time getting pregnant.

I have a higher chance of miscarriage,

so I may be doing all this and putting my body

through this wild ride, but there's a significant chance

that it won't work.

If we can't have a kid, I don't know.

I mean, I'll be devastated.

- Well, you can only hope for the best.

I mean-- - Yeah.

Just leave it up to God. - That's it.

- Thanks for being supportive with it all.

- Yeah, of course.

- I love you.

- ♪ Hey, I'm gonna leave it ♪

♪ I'm gonna sing it ♪

♪ I'm gonna leave it ♪

- [groans]

Oh, my God.

If my implant breaks again.

Hello?

- Come on in, ma'am.

Do you need help?

- Yes.

- How's your house doing?

- Ugh, a mess.

So tomorrow's the meatball party.

But my house is currently being renovated,

and I don't have a functioning kitchen,

so I'm at Nicole's to use her functioning kitchen.

Are you ready to crack one open?

- Why do you have vodka?

- Vodka sauce.

- Oh, you're going in.

- Mmm. I love f*cking vodka sauce.

It's my favorite.

I really just like alcohol, okay?

- Can you help me? 'Cause I don't make meatballs.

I want to make traditional Italian meatballs

like my grandma used to make,

but I don't know how to actually make them.

- So where do you get your meatballs?

- I order from the Italian pizzeria.

- [sighs] Great.

I'm really looking forward to also making Nicole's ba*ls.

[traditional Italian music]

What kind of meatball doesn't know how to make meatballs?

Let's be f*cking for real.

- All right. What are we doing?

- First, let's prep.

Where's your seasoning?

- Um...

- Do you have gloves?

Do you have a cutting board?

- Bro, this isn't a f*cking restaurant.

[electronic music]

♪ ♪

- Meatball party.

They're gonna love my meatballs.

Since I can't make it to this meatball competition tomorrow,

I'm going to ship, overnight, something special.

These things smell amazing.

And I want to win this thing,

so I'm bringing in my secret weapon.

- That's not how you taste something.

- It's just about ready.

She's back. - I'm back.

- ♪ I'm gonna pop right now ♪

- Who is that? - I got a girlfriend.

- Hi. - What the hell?

- I got my side and my main piece.

- Angelina! [all exclaiming]

You just poured wine on me, b*tch.

Hi.

- Who ever heard of a Jamaican cooking Italian?

- I think if it's too good, they'll know that I made that.

- I don't want to get caught in a lie.

So technically, I did make them. [laughs]

So me and Nikki, we're great.

We've been together for over four years now,

and this is the longest relationship I've ever had.

I'm not an easy guy to date, because I'm never really home.

- Well, you think of it that way, but I like when you leave.

- Come on. - [laughs]

That's when I get everything done.

I started a business, BAIR BIKINI.

- And it's a successful bikini line.

- Growing up in Jamaica, it's part of the culture

to pretty much wake up in a bikini.

And I wanted to have something to show for that,

so I designed this collection.

- This is nice quality. Wow.

- I know, right? - It's really nice.

- It's been a really long process,

but I missed everybody so much.

I'm so happy to be back.

- So who are you looking forward to seeing the most?

- I love Lauren, obviously,

but everyone has their own little things

about them that I love. - What about Vinny?

- I'm sitting next to Pauly.

- Sit on the floor.

- You're the side piece, not me.

- Oh. - Oh. [laughs]

- Oh, Vinny, your beard grew in.

- Shut up. - Yeah, me too.

- Ew! - Oh!

- I hate when your side piece and your main piece fight.

- Oh, sh*t.

- Vinny's just--he's like--

he's like the little thing on your shoulder

that you just want to, like, flick off.

- Whoa.

- But I love Vinny, too, in his own way.

And I'm ready to just share more experiences

and memories with you guys.

- Beautiful, my love.

Ew, man. - [laughs]

Lipstick.

- These things smell amazing. It's getting me hungrys.

- I feel like we should keep them for ourselves.

- [laughs] Same. - And maybe, like--

can we, like, DoorDash them meatballs there?

- Yeah, 'cause I'm hungry. These are looking too good.

- What do you eat that with? - Italian bread.

That's what I like to do. But obviously--

- Like, a meatball sandwich?

- You could put it in your pa-- put it over your pasta.

- Yeah. - Rigatoni is my favorite.

What's your favorite pasta?

- You know they're all the same, right?

It's just shaped different.

- I got to go.

"It's all the same"? - It's the same--

- Then why do we have different ones?

Does that look the same? - Yeah, it's the same color.

- Does that look the same? - It's the same color.

- Does that look the same? - It's the same ingredients.

- That's like saying all cars are the same.

They all drive you.

- No, you just--you shape-- it's shaped--

- They all have doors.

- They shape them... - Are you okay?

- Or cut them.

[laughter]

- Peanut, what am I gonna make?

Rachael Ray, where are you at?

Listen, I'm not Susie homemaker.

I'm sorry. Martha Stewart, love ya,

but that's not me.

Let me see how it feels to have ba*ls.

Ooh, it's cold!

Okay.

Oh! Oh!

[screams]

How do you people walk around like this all day?

Ooh. I'm gonna--f*ck.

I'm still putting it in the pan.

[laughs] There's one in my as*h*le.

We're gonna cook these for Mike.

[laughs]

And you know what? Rightfully so.

I was not invited to Mia Bella's birthday.

What the f*ck? I was very taken back.

And I texted Mike, "You're a piece of sh*t."

And then, after that, I blocked him.

- She texted Lauren yesterday,

"I am hurt that I wasn't invited."

- But the last text message, if you looked at that thread,

was from August of last year... - Exactly.

- The day she sat here... - Exactly. Yes.

- And I had to deal with stuff with ..

- Sometimes I'm like, why are you with me

if you hate me so much?

He's like, I don't know.

- Ange, this sounds like red flag central.

So that's the last time I spoke with her one on one.

- Yeah.

- It looks pretty damn good.

- Why?

It's not poison.

I'm not sure how this is gonna go,

because I'm pissed the f*ck off.

- Fine.

I'm ordering f*cking meatballs, okay?

If Mike starts talking his crap,

I'm going to f*cking lose my sh*t.

I don't know what his problem is.

- You've always been a friend to her.

You've gone there to help her

when she was having issues with Chris.

- I'm, like, in this house alone.

- I can only imagine how stressful it is.

- You've gone there to be an ear to listen

when she was going through stuff with the girls.

- Take the high road. Send them a text.

Extend that olive branch.

It goes a really long way when you do that.

I was there when she had problems with ..

- Yeah. - I made her the sandwich.

When I have a bad day, I have a sandwich.

- Thank you.

- Relationships are a give and take,

and there hasn't been any reciprocation

with her. - No.

- Do you think it's gonna be awkward

because he didn't invite her?

- I feel like she's not gonna push it under the rug.

- If both of them are there tomorrow,

I wonder if she's, like, annoyed

that she wasn't invited.

- Maybe she'll just be like, good vibes only.

I don't know. - Oh, really?

- The only thing consistent with Angelina is chaos,

and that's the only thing that I can project.

- f*ck you.

- Why is it always my house?

- ♪ Ding, ding, here comes the winner ♪

♪ Bling bling on my finger ♪

- What have we got to do here, roll these up?

Because I got a meatball party to go to.

- Okay, we're almost there.

- I've got this meatball competition in the bag.

You can't compete with a traditional Sicilian mom.

- Are they good cooks?

- Sammi, I don't think she cooks.

Angelina, I don't think she can boil water.

Nicole, I don't think she cooks either.

They don't make 'em like they used to anymore.

- I know, Vinny. You got to go to Sicily

and get one in the--

- No, they have no teeth.

- They have no teeth? - Yeah.

- So? You know a lot of dentists.

You got me teeth.

- Ma.

I'm still single, still, you know, looking for the one.

I've been doing stand-up comedy more.

I graduated from the College of Staten Island.

- [laughs] - Exactly.

[laughter]

I'm a reality star transitioning into a comedian.

My pronouns are ha, ha.

- Ha.

Wait, is that funny? Wait.

- I've been starting a podcast.

I've been doing charity work.

I'm past now.

I'm closer to .

You can't just be a stripper forever,

so I'm trying to find more purpose, meaning in my life.

- So how's the therapy going?

- Therapist has been helping a lot with sleep.

- When you was talking about how your brain talks to you

and stuff, you know, I never looked

at it that deep, you know?

- But it's an ongoing process, and therapy just

kind of helps you navigate challenges

that are uncontrollable.

- It gives you the path.

- Yeah, the right choices to make.

- Right. Your therapist, I liked him.

He's very nice. Very handsome.

Does he know you have a single mother?

- Ma. - Is he married?

- He has a girlfriend. - Oh, really?

- Mm-hmm. Sorry. - Serious girlfriend?

- This is weird.

- So I like small ba*ls.

- Oh, I like big ba*ls.

- What is the benefit of big ba*ls?

- A lot of "spermies."

- Oh, I was thinking, like, they just take longer to cook.

- Oh, I thought you meant--

[laughter]

I thought you meant real ba*ls.

- What's this?

- Oh.

I just want to see

if I have siblings and what they look like.

[dramatic music]

So I bought a DNA test.

- Shut the f*ck up.

- I'm not saying, like, I want to meet them.

I just want to see what happens.

You know, I'm adopted.

All I know is that I was born in Santiago, Chile,

adopted at six months.

My parents got me at the airport.

Boom. That's it.

- So what made you decide to, like, look into your family?

- Honestly, Angelina's sh*t.

- I have been able to locate Angelina's father.

- [gasps] - Oh, my.

- Are you f*cking kidding me? - Oh, my--

- Angelina's paternal family. - Do you have pictures as well?

- I've got some pictures.

[all exclaim]

- Oh, my God.

- Like, I want Pamela to, like, come over and show me stuff.

- [gasps]

This is like a whole new world.

- I'm excited to talk to Angelina about this.

I feel like she'll understand what I'm going through.

She'll help me with, like, any feelings that I have.

This is, like, a big deal, I feel.

I always think, like, do they know it's me?

- Oh, and then that. - Because "Jersey Shore"

definitely played in Chilena.

- Imagine they were looking from afar, like--

- And then they saw what I was doing,

and they were like, ugh,

thank God we gave her up.

- No.

- Like, watching me get arrested.

- Be f*cking proud. Look at you.

You're f*cking Snooki.

- Look at me.

Look at us.

- Let's check these meatballs out.

Oh, wow.

Winner, winner, chicken dinner. - You're welcome.

- Mmm. Perfect.

- Yeah? - Thanks, boo.

[doorbell rings] - Hello.

- Hello. - Hi.

Whoa, so heavy. - Yes

- Wow. - Are they good?

- No one could be mad with these ba*ls in their mouth.

- I hope other people feel like that.

- Oh, sh*t.

I forgot to put eggs in it.

- [laughs] - I was talking

about, like, stuff.

I didn't even think.

- Between me and you,

I made these, okay?

- You did a great job. - Yeah. Thank you.

And I worked hard for these.

- You can do this part, because it's just stirring.

- Well, can I do the eating?

[phone rings]

Hello.

- Oh, what's good, my guy? How are you?

- Bro, that's so amazing.

I'm % down.

Thanks for thinking of me. I love that.

Is this the same weekend as the--

[epic music]

[epic music]

- Amazing. Well, thank you so much.

I'm looking forward to it. - Absolutely, bro.

- Bro, how cool is that? - Wow.

- I get to show the world that I'm not only just a DJ.

I'm actually an athlete. - [laughs] Okay.

- I got to tell the crew to come out for that.

- Oh, yeah.

- Last time Vinny was in Vegas, he was stripping.

I hope he keeps his clothes on this time.

- [laughs]

- When it comes to Angelina, I got to take a stand.

What's up? How are you, Satan?

- Oh, my God. - Excuse me?

- And the meatball day turns to sh*t.

[upbeat Italian music]

♪ ♪

- I'll be back.

[doorbell rings] - Hey, Meatball.

- Hi. Happy meatball day.

I have a bunch of stuff.

I think I got enough balloons.

I'm gonna float away.

Okay.

I can't see anything right now.

- That's a lot of balloons.

- It's a meatball party.

You have to have a lot of decor.

We have little meatball straws, cute signs, cute apron.

These are, like, little meatballs.

Stop. Look at how cute these are.

- What the f*ck is that?

- It's a spaghetti and meatball hat.

- They're really ugly.

- Oh, it's not cute?

We just want this meatball competition

party to be perfect.

- Ew. These literally look like poop.

- I'm sure Angelina has hurt feelings over Mia Bella's

birthday party, but I'm hoping that everyone

is like, it's a meatball party.

Let's leave the drama at the door,

and let's just enjoy each other's meatballs.

- It might be chaos.

- Look, in case things get heated,

I got a stress meatball,

in case somebody gets annoyed or aggravated.

Then they can just-- - Perfect.

[upbeat music]

[line trills]

- Oh, my God.

Angelina, what's up?

- [sighs]

I'm a little skeptical about going to this.

- Skeptical for what, a meatball party?

- Well, because Mike didn't invite me

to his daughter's birthday.

I just don't understand why.

Just do me a favor. Pray for me, okay?

- Okay.

- Bye.

- [sighs]

And the meatball day is about to turn to sh*t.

[line trills]

- Yo.

- Angelina just called me.

- Oh, God.

- The first thing out of her mouth,

"I can't believe I wasn't invited."

- Ugh. It's too early in the morning for this.

- We're all going with the intention of having,

like, a great meatball day.

And I don't know if that's what it's about to be.

- [sighs]

[upbeat music]

- ♪ Yeah, let's go, let's go ♪

♪ ♪

♪ I'm about to seize the day ♪

- What up?

It has arrived. - What is it?

- It's a football tossing thing

so I can practice for the big game.

I mean, I'm good at football,

but even pro athletes have to practice.

- I think this is for kids.

- Who said that?

- The box.

Ages and over. - Exactly.

And how old am I? Older.

Here we go. Here we go.

- You're the one supposed to be catching the ball.

[screams]

- Oops.

- It went into the neighbor's yard.

- Well, that wasn't supposed to happen.

Well, now get the regular football, man.

All right, so we're gonna do a play right here.

So you're gonna be the quarterback.

- What? I don't know American football.

- You got to say, hut, hut, hut.

And you're gonna hit me right over there by the white fence.

- Hut, hut, hike? - No. Hut.

Hit it with more bass.

Hit it with more bass. - Hut, hut, hut.

[laughs] - Come on, man.

We're gonna lose the game.

Maybe she isn't the best person to practice with.

- Hut, hut, hut.

Hike. [laughs]

I did exactly what you told me to do.

- Okay, madam.

Wonder what's going down at that meatball party right now?

[doorbell rings]

- Hi. - Hey, girl.

- Welcome to the meatball party.

- Yesterday, you should have saw me.

I put frozen ba*ls in my vag*na...

- Why? - And It felt really good.

- What the f*ck?

I hope those aren't the ones you're serving today.

- Ew. - No.

[upbeat music]

- It's a meatball party.

Hello? - Hey, we're down here!

- Come downstairs!

- Ooh, look at the decorations.

- Welcome to the meatball party.

- Jenni, look at our charcuterie board.

- Hey, can I have a wine?

- It's : a.m.

♪ ♪

- Oh, how cute.

[doorbell rings] Hi.

- Hey, Sam.

Welcome to the meatball party.

- Oh, my God, this is so cute.

Hey.

- Hi, Sam.

- Me and Angelina have not spoken since Tucson.

- No, you're allowed to do a f*cking TikTok,

and I can't do what the f*ck--

- Well, you can be a shitty person and DM fan pages.

f*ck you, b*tch. - f*ck off.

Wait. Do we hang these?

- Look, I'm not feeling good today.

I have a lot going on with this whole IVF thing.

I don't want problems with Angelina.

- Wait. Sam, forgot something.

- But you just never know with her.

- Sam.

- Are you playing with me already?

b*tch, I don't need the drama.

- No more.

- You stop too. - Oh, God.

What is this?

- I'm serious.

- Sam.

- Are you playing with me already?

- b*tch, I really don't want to fight with you.

- I don't, either. I'm serious.

I don't need the drama. - No more.

- You stop too.

- I was very upset.

- I don't want problems.

- Okay.

- I have nothing but respect for you.

I would like the same. - Okay.

- Oh, they're hugging. Okay.

Oh, thank God.

- ♪ Mami's so hot and sexual ♪

♪ I could pop a vessel ♪

♪ How could I not express to you ♪

♪ I am so special ♪

[doorbell rings] - Ugh.

Now I got to walk upstairs.

- Hello. - Hi.

- Love how you dressed up for the occasion.

"You don't matter. Give up."

- Some of you need to, you know,

read it in different ways.

- Okay. [all exclaim]

- You know what?

- And here we go.

When it comes to Angelina,

I feel like I'm at a point

where the straw has broken the camel's back.

Where are you guys?

- We're down here.

- Oh.

It's time for me to let her know.

We got to put 'em in the oven.

Hey. - Okay, Mike.

- I got to take a stand, even if it causes some waves.

- Hi, Michael. - What's up, guys?

How are you? - Hey.

- Hi. - How are you, Mike?

- How are you? Hey. - Hi, Mike.

- What's up? How are you, Satan?

- Oh, my God.

- Excuse me?

[dramatic music]

What was that about?

♪ ♪

What the f*ck?

Okay, here we go.

♪ ♪

- It's our time to shine, guys. - Yep.

I'm glad we in real Versace. [laughter]

- I'm not gonna get any numbers from any strippers this time.

- Hold on one second. - Are we doing this right now?

- Oh, my God. [all shouting]

- We're going to... all: Vegas!

- Win, win for the big game.

- Can I meet Taylor Swift?

- ♪ You ain't got no alibi, you ugly ♪

- Nothing to see here. [all exclaim]

Wait, I wasn't ready!

I just remembered, I'm scared of heights.

- I'm, like, scared to move.

all: We're back, Miami!

- This is great.

On a yacht, b*tch. Thank you.

- Where did you take us?

- It's the middle of nowhere.

- Welcome in our underground bunker!

- It's the apocalypse.

- I'm starving.

- Who's gonna be the first sacrifice?

- Everybody's okay with eating me?

- Meatballs tastes better.

- I would eat your a*s. - [laughs]

- All right, guys, we're gonna come back with your sister.

Are you ready to see Luna?

- Nobody knows what I've been going through.

It's really just very scary.

- I mean, we'll be there for you, either way.

- Because, like, I know I'm adopted.

- Everybody deserves to know where they come from.

- I'm gonna cry.

This could be, like, a huge, life-changing year.

- Whoa.

- Holy God.

- You guys want to be together? - I don't know.

- For a long time, I didn't stick up for myself with you,

because you're a beast. - What?

- I would never get clout off someone else's tears.

- She doesn't care,

because she's over it. - She does care.

- You need to be f*cking accountable for what you say.

- Yo, there's some beef over here.

- You have yet to once look at me and say, I'm so sorry.

- Get out of my room. Get out of my room!

- I haven't seen them this upset in a very long time.

- Don't act like I'm stupid, sweetie.

I'm an A f*cking student.

- Are you sure about that? - Mm.

- There is a w*r going on.

- Let Jenni speak.

- Jenni's taking it to, like, another level.

Get off your high horse.

- Hold my earrings.

- We got to handle this beef...

It's a problem now.

Because there might not be any family left.

- Justin has an announcement.

- [screaming] - Why would you do this?

- What? Babe.

- [laughing] - Enough is enough.

- You are using Angelina.

- Okay, I'm using her.

- You don't love her. - Who the f*ck

are you to tell me I don't love her?

- Stop!

- Let me out.

- We ran out of wine.

- There's no wine.

We're gonna die.