06x08 - Dancing with the Chooch

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ MTV ♪

- There's my guy. There's my guy!

- What's up, man? - [laughs]

What's up? I'm excited to see this chooch.

My boy, my best friend, Vinny, is on "Dancing with the Stars."

So me and Mike, we are in LA to support him.

- Oh! - Oh!

- Y'all guys changed. - Come on, baby.

- I remember when you used to work out in the gym.

- I still want us to have a good time, but, like,

just be professional.

This trip is all business.

[upbeat music]

all:Skal!

- Why did I have to fart?

- Please don't do that in public.

- [screams]

- Why are we good at everything?

- 'Cause we're cool. [laughter]

- We have literally four hours before our flight.

- b*tches, are we going to the airport as maids?

[upbeat music]

- Yeah, buddy!

- Party's here!

- The Situation is under construction.

- We're so classy now.

- On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

- Get the frig out of here, you crazy!

- Um, hello?

♪ ♪

- ♪ Caught me chillin' in the backseat ♪

♪ Dressed like I'm fancy ♪

- Chooch, where you at?

It's premiere day.

- Vin, you almost ready?

- Premiere day, chooch.

- Come on, my guy.

- Yo, yo, yo.

- There's the man of the hour.

- I'm about to go.

It is premiere day, and I am getting a little bit nervous.

I feel like everything's riding on it,

like, the whole world is watching.

- Ah, well, I mean-- - They are.

- Definitely. - Yeah, yeah.

- We all are. - Definitely. We all are.

- I have the moves down.

You know, I've been rehearsing this dance

for more than two weeks now.

The last thing that I have to do

is just go ahead and perform it.

- Are you sure? I mean, listen,

we could put everything on hold, call the wifey.

- I'll change my flight right now.

- You guys-- - I'll change the flights.

- Nah, you guys got your flights, and so--

- No, I'll change my flight right now.

- No, no, you're good. - Exactly.

- Mike and Pauly really wanted to come out to LA

and support me, but I don't want them

to come to the first show, because this is distracting.

[sighs] I don't know, I'm feeling some pressure, so--

- All right, all right, all right, all right.

- So these guys gotta get out of here.

- Let's do a little MVP before you go.

- Oh, hell yeah.

- I say we say "premiere night."

- M. - V.

- P. all: Premiere night!

- Let's go! - It's your night, kid.

- Let's go, baby. Let's go, baby.

- This is your night, kid.

- Let's go, let's go. Thanks for coming.

Love you guys. - We'll lock up.

- And don't f*ck up like you did at the wedding.

- ♪ I don't wanna go on, go on ♪

♪ I do it, I wanna be ♪

♪ Forever young and free ♪

- I did my job.

Yay, "Dancing with the Stars."

I'm gonna invite the girls over

so we can watch "Dancing with the Stars"

in my theater to cheer on Vinny.

- "Dancing with the Stars" party.

- You have to fix your eyelash.

- I know.

I've been punched.

- Hello? Hi!

- I got wine.

- I love walking into that.

She has an eyelash thing.

- Do you have glue?

I'm so excited for Vinny.

He's gonna be on "Dancing with the Stars."

Mike did it. I did it.

And Vinny, he's just really good on stage

in front of people.

So I feel like he's gonna k*ll it.

[gasps] - You're a mess.

- Premiere day.

You've got this.

You've got this, Vinny.

I've never danced live before.

I've never danced at all before.

You know what I mean?

There's no, like, missing a step

and then doing it over again.

The nerves are just getting started, baby.

[phone ringing] Hello?

- Tonight's the night, Vin. Tonight's the night.

- All right, bro, I'm focusing.

You don't gotta keep calling me.

It's on Disney Plus.

- I'm focusing.

I'm about to hit the stage.

- You know it, bud. Go be the greatest.

- All right. - Your mom, me, and Tona,

we'll be watching it too.

- All right, tell everyone I said hello.

Love you. Bye.

[phone ringing]

Hello?

- Thinking what I'm thinking? I can push my flight back.

- Yeah. - I say we watch it,

and then we party with him after,

'cause he said he just didn't want us there.

- I mean, listen, he wants the support.

- Yeah, and he's gonna wanna celebrate with us after.

- We could make good use of this apartment.

- Yep. - I'm wondering if this guy's

got any snackers in the crib.

- Here we are.

No turning back now.

- Oh, hi. - Grab a glass of wine.

- I can't believe this.

- He's probably peeing his pants.

- Oh, snap.

- It's empty.

- Yeah.

- What is this? - Wow.

- There's, like, three kernels of popcorn in here.

- Electrolyte-infused popcorn? Like, how is it--

- Ugh! - Really? It's that bad?

- It's Styrofoam.

- It's electrolyte-infused popcorn.

- It's Styrofoam. Ew.

Grass-fed beef sticks.

Zero sugar. - Ah.

- If you pay extra, can I get some sugar?

- Oh! - [laughs]

- It tastes like dog food.

I gotta get that taste out of my mouth.

Grain-free tortilla chips.

Actually, these are not bad.

- They're not bad. - Not bad.

- I'm gonna hook this. Let's hope it works.

- Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck--

- Shut up, Nino. - [laughs]

- I'm stressed out as it is.

You know what?

I hope this thing works.

Okay.

- From "Jersey Shore," Vinny Guadagnino and Koko Iwasaki.

- It's starting!

- Stop! - Go, Vin!

- Hey! - Vinny!

- There he is. There he is.

- Vinny!

- Knock 'em dead.

- Do not speak while he's dancing.

- Vinny!

It's happening! [shrieks]

- Oh! He's dancing! - Oh, my God!

- Dancing the salsa with his partner Koko Iwasaki,

it's Vinny Guadagnino.

- There's my boy. Show them what you do.

- Shut up.

[sighs]

- Go, Vin!

Oh, my God.

- What kind of dance is this, Nicole?

- The cha-cha. - Cha-cha?

- He's doing the cha-cha.

Go, Vin!

Oh, I'm gonna scream. - I'm gonna throw up.

- I'm gonna throw up. - Oh, wow!

- [shrieks] Stop!

- I didn't know he could move like that.

- Get it, Vinny. Get it, Vinny.

- Hey.

- Oh, there he is. - Oh, he did that move

that he showed us. - Yup.

[upbeat salsa music]

♪ ♪

- Ah-h*! - All right!

- [indistinct speech]

[all cheering]

- Bro, he nailed it. - He k*lled it.

I think Vinny did amazing, and I'm so proud of him.

I'm thinking to myself, like, this boy can go far.

I mean, he's really putting in the work.

- I don't get it, Vinny, because, you know,

this, out of all the dances, is a club dance.

- Yo. - And you didn't show me that.

It was rough.

- It was rough? - It was rough?

- He's not a dancer.

What the hell is happening?

- It's different from the Chippendales, isn't it?

- A little bit, a little bit.

- He just said it's not Chippendales.

- Yeah, I know.

- I don't see any of them doing Chippendales.

- Yeah.

- You let her do all the work.

I kind of felt like I wanna see more of you.

- They're coming for my boy.

- I'm sorry, Vin.

I really wanted you to come out and knock my socks off.

But unfortunately...

- I'm gonna knock your socks off.

- Tonight, that just didn't happen.

- All right, let's see his scores.

I'm annoyed.

- Carrie Ann Inaba.

- Four.

- A four? - A four?

- Ohh. - Oh, come on.

- Five.

- He didn't mess up, so how could they give him a four?

He didn't mess up.

- They look sad. - Stop, I'm gonna k*ll someone.

- Oh, Vinny's face just broke my heart.

- That's low, but we are hoping that we can keep you back here

and get you back next week.

- Doo-doo.

Doo-doo.

- Um...

sh*t, he's not gonna be happy.

- The judges have been very hard on Vinny tonight,

and also, this chooch does not want us here.

- I don't know. We probably ought to leave,

pretend like we didn't even see this.

We was on the plane the whole time.

I ate all his chips.

Abort mission. - Yo.

Let's get out of here, man. - Put these cutlets back.

- If I was this dude, I'd probably be pissed.

So I think it's time for us to go.

- He ain't even gonna notice that--

- Mm-mm. - About these cutlets.

I'm pretty positive you had three cutlets the whole time.

Yo, did--did they say he made it?

They didn't say yet? - Mm-mm.

- Yo, grab your phone and vote.

- Voted.

Let's go out of here or I'm not making my flight.

- Try to send some food to his house.

- Good idea. - Where do you find

Styrofoam popcorn, though? - I don't know.

- They're voting somebody off tonight,

and Vinny just got all fours.

- So how do they vote someone off, though?

Do they vote it by lowest score for tonight?

- Lowest score tallied with the votes.

- Did you ever get a four?

- No.

- We should--we all need-- - We need to vote right now.

- That's pretty scary.

- , right?

- No, . - Okay.

- And then say on Twitter, tell everyone to do it.

- Okay. - Here's my phone.

Vote for me, too.

Here's my phone. - Wait.

- What is this? What are they doing now?

- Oh, it's elimination. - Stop.

- Yeah. - God, it's happening.

- Come on, Vinny.

- This next couple who are safe are Wayne and Whitney.

- Come on, Vinny. - Why isn't he getting picked?

Oh, my God, no.

- Oh, no.

- Charli and Mark.

- Of course, Charli.

- There's four left. There's four left.

- And... - You ready?

- Yes, sir. Oh, wow.

- I was trying to be a little subtle tonight.

I kind of wanted to make a statement.

- That, you did.

- A felon?

Oh, no.

Oh, f*ck no.

Calling me a felon?

Saying I should have got arrested?

Like, are you f*cking kidding me?

Mike is tweeting bad stuff about me.

- Mike and Ange, they're always fighting.

- Isn't he the one that's an actual felon

that didn't pay his f*cking taxes

and can't even vote for a president?

- ♪ Pedal to the metal, all gas, no brakes ♪

♪ Pedal to the metal, all gas, no brakes ♪

♪ Pedal to the metal ♪

- In th place with points,

we have Vinny and Koko.

- What is this? What are they doing now?

Is this-- - Oh, it's elimination.

- Stop. - God, it's happening.

- Come on, Vinny.

- The next couple who are safe are Wayne and Whitney.

[midtempo music]

- Come on, Vinny! - Why isn't he getting picked?

- Come on, Vin.

- Oh, my God, no.

- Oh, no.

- Charli and Mark...

- Of course, Charli.

- There's four left. There's four left.

- And Vinny and Koko.

[cheering]

- He's safe! - Let's go, b*tch!

We did it!

[bright music]

- Yes!

Love you, boy!

- He's safe. - Oh, thank Christ.

- Oh, my God, I got goosies.

- I knew it. See?

- [speaking Italian]

- [laughs] - Yeah.

- Cheers to that. - We'll see you next Monday.

- See you there. - Every single week.

- Come on, Vin.

Vinny is saved, thank God.

I was so worried because it sucks

to be eliminated from a competition,

especially "Dancing with the Stars."

It's, like, once in a lifetime.

So I'm happy for him.

Cheers to Vin.

- Round one. - Cheers to Vinny!

[cheering]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Oh, Vinny, Vinny, Vinny, Vinny.

Oh, Vinny, Vinny.

- Why'd they have to go so hard on me?

- They did, Vin.

- I mean, I guess--

I did--I did one-- why are you crying?

- That old b*stard, that old b*stard.

- Vin, they were so mean to you.

- Vinny, your mother, she--

- Me and someone else were saying that too, like,

we--we messed up, like, one little thing,

and they're like, oh, it was horrible.

The good news is, is that I thought

I was going to go home.

- Oh, you did think you were going?

- Yeah, I think I had the lowest score. [laughs]

- You did, but then people voted for you.

- All right. - Love you. Love you.

- I'm gonna go back inside to do press.

- Okay, congratulations. - All right, all right.

- Congratulations, Vinny. Bye. - Love you.

- "Dancing with the Stars," it's definitely

a lot tougher than I thought it was gonna be.

So the focus has to be on dancing, and that's it.

- He was like, Ma, why are you crying?

He's always saying that to me since he was two.

[laughter]

- Hello? Ma'am?

- We're here! - We're here for the show.

- Week two, b*tches. - Two.

- Week two, time to redeem myself,

focus on this quick step.

- I want you to envision Elvis.

Like, you are Elvis.

"Thank you very much," and he does, like,

that little, like--

oh, my God, Vinny, yes, this is great.

This is great. - Wow.

- Good. - All right, Vinny!

Right on, baby! - Oh...

- Does he have mutton chops? - My God.

- out of for Vinny and Koko.

That's points higher than last week.

How do you feel? - Started from the bottom,

now we're here.

- Oh, my God! - Aw, he did his thing.

- Nice, Vinny.

- It's all starting to make sense.

- ♪ You can't stop us now ♪

- Rumba. - Is it hard?

- Do you think his d*ck got hard?

- Oh. - Look how sexual.

- His pee-pee's coming out of his pants, though.

- Oh, my God, Ange.

[cheering]

- You're really, really fun to watch.

- I'm trying, I'm learning this every week,

like, for the first time.

I wanna formally, officially

invite you guys to come to LA.

- Oh, hell yeah.

Let's get it, man.

- It's official.

Mike and Pauly are coming back to LA.

- ♪ All this money is what I choose ♪

♪ Get it all, never hit snooze ♪

♪ I got that paper chase ambition ♪

- Dude. - What's up?

- We are here.

We are back. We are back in LA,

and this time, we're there to actually support our boy,

actually go to the show.

- I'm happy to now sit in the crowd and cheer our boy on.

- They've been talking a lot of sh*t.

And I got something to say.

- Exactly.

- Bro, they were going hard. - Yeah.

- They were going hard. - Exactly.

- I'm like, take it easy. The guy's

not a professional dancer. - Exactly.

- He's trying. - I'm like,

are they "prejudence" against Italians?

- Yeah, they're "presidents" against strippers.

I'm excited for the show, man.

Does it bring back memories for you?

- It does.

The foot is sort of on the other shoe, I guess.

[buzzer blares]

- Yo, Paola didn't bring no food this time?

Last time, she brought them cutlets.

- Well, this time, she kind of brought

some sausage and peppers.

Hey, what a pleasant surprise.

- You think you can handle it?

- Yes, yes. - To surprise my son?

- This is in good hands.

They were sliced thinly. - Oh-hoh-hoh.

- Next thing you know it, I had--

- Don't even tell me.

- Yo, I had a little bit of a taste test.

If he brings up anything about sausage and peppers,

you know, I gotta plead the fifth on this one.

[upbeat music]

- Here we are. - Let's go. MVP in LA.

Let's go.

[doorbell ringing repeatedly]

- Yo. - That's a cool doorbell.

- I hear you. I hear you. - Come on, man. Let us in.

- I remember that doorbell from last time.

We're going to the show tonight, boy.

- There's hotels out here, you know what I mean?

- We goin' to the show tonight.

- Now that, like, I've had bad weeks,

I've had good weeks, I'm kind of ready

for Mike and Pauly to show up.

I kind of feel like I have nothing to lose,

and now is the perfect time for them to come watch me.

- It's a big night tonight. It's week four.

- Yeah. - It's week four.

- Mike went home on week four. - I know. I know.

I have to--no.

When I heard Mike went home on week four,

I kind of thought, like, damn,

I hope I get farther than Mike. [laughs]

You know, you guys are here for a good one.

It's Disney night. - Yeah.

- Ooh.

- I'm doing a song from "Luca." - Yeah.

- What are you wearing tonight, man?

What's the outfit tonight?

- I'm dressed as, like, a little boy

and sh*t, you know?

- So you don't gotta change?

[laughter]

- I'm just happy you guys are here,

and it's been rough, you know?

I've been at the bottom twice, and I don't really

have people with me in the audience and stuff.

- Yeah. - I miss the East Coast though.

- Yeah. - I miss foo--I miss home.

Oh, speaking of, did my mom give you anything to give me?

- Not me. - No?

- Nah. - She didn't drop anything off?

She said she might give you something.

♪ ♪

I miss my mom's cooking.

- Yeah, same.

- ♪ Let the drop top on a whip top, top ♪

♪ On a whip t-t-top, on a whip, yep ♪

- I gotta go to rehearsal.

We have rehearsal all day. - You need to go.

- I wanna come to rehearsal. - Rehearsal?

- Yeah, I wanna see what it's like behind the scenes.

Big day today, boy. - Let's go rehearse.

- Big day today.

- Why are you bringing your suitcase?

- I don't know. [laughter]

- ♪ Every summer, huh ♪

♪ We gonna run amok, make your head pop ♪

♪ Rock, rock it and drop, don't stop ♪

- Me and Chris just bought a new house.

We moved in a couple weeks ago, but...

You're a mess.

Pure Deena fashion, I, like, already decorated

so the boys felt more at home.

So it's like we've been living here for, like, the last year.

The girls are coming over.

None of them have seen my new house yet,

so I'm really excited for them to see it.

- Fancy.

Seeing this new house, I'm like,

oh my God, it's a mansion.

And I'm so confused because I feel like she was just

yelling at us about her old house.

- Ooh, I have a stone house.

I have a f*cking stone house.

Why do I need aa a million-dollar house?

- Dang, she has two doors?

Which door do I go?

- I don't need to show off my money.

- Deeners, are you rich?

- It's like, actually, I'm living smarter.

Hey, I'm in the kitchen.

- Your house is beautiful.

- Thank you.

I don't need a house like Mike. - Your house is gorgeous.

- I don't need a house like Jenni's.

I don't need a house like yours.

- You have two doors in the front.

That means you're rich.

- Ooh, I have a stone house.

- What a nice place.

- Why do need an a million-dollar house?

Just to show it off?

[in slow motion] Ooh, I have a stone house.

I have a f*cking stone house.

Yeah, I love it. It's, like--it's--it's me.

- Wait, so I feel, like, cozy vibes like your old house.

- Right? - But it's bigger.

- Right? - Can I come in?

- Hey, we're in the kitchen. - Hey, girl.

- Hello. - Hi, ma'am.

- I love your new house.

- Hello? - Come in!

We're in the family room.

- How are you guys? - Welcome, welcome.

- Do you have tinsel in your hair?

- I do. - She's . I love it.

- You wanna feel it? - Is it actual tinsel?

- That's so funny. It's tinsel?

- Yes. - It's real tinsel.

- Are you keeping this for New Orleans?

- So all of a sudden, we get a text from Pauly.

Pauly just texted me.

Next family vacation is NOLA.

And I'm like, why not?

- I'm gonna be out in NOLA.

I got a show out here, and I was trying

to get the g*ng together.

- Have you ever been to New Orleans?

- NOLA, NOLA. - NOLA.

- Do we need to bring beads? - What do you need beads for?

Are you not seeing enough boobies?

- Are you ready for New Orleans?

- We had such a good time when we went there.

- God, New Orleans,

that's where my bachelorette party was.

- Bachelorette party!

[screaming]

- Angeliner!

[screaming, laughter]

- And now I am divorced,

so I'm not really feeling going there.

It's bringing up bad memories for me.

- At least this trip, we're going in--

in good spirits, all of us.

- Can we find spirits down there?

I wanna do something really f*cking scary.

- Wait, I just came back from Salem, right?

When I was in Salem, I bought mad,

like, witch spell books.

- Let's do it down there. - Ooh.

- I'm not doing anything that's gonna upset spirits.

- No, I have everything we need.

- Let's do it. - Well, I'm not doing anything.

- Do you have the ingredients?

- I have a f*cking pendulum thing.

- What does it mean?

We're not doing anything like that in this house.

- Don't do it.

- It's not gonna bring anything bad.

It's just-- - I don't care.

Listen, I don't want people to talk

about bad juju in my house.

My house is good vibes only.

- I've done it in my own house a million times.

- I don't care. That's your house.

We're not doing that in my house.

- But nothing bad happen-- - Don't do it here.

- We're not doing it in my house.

- I'm so excited. - Can we do it?

- Can we do it? - Don't f*cking do it

in my house! - Come on! Why?

- Because I'm telling you right now

we're not doing it in my house.

- I'm telling you right now.

- No, we're not doing it in anywhere

around my house. - It's not like that.

- And if you guys do it in and around my house

and I see that you do it around my house...

- Oh, my God. - I'm really am f*cking

not talk to you guys ever again.

- Oh, my God.

- We're not doing that sh*t. I'm telling you right now.

- Mom's mad. [laughter]

- f*ck, b*tch. - No! No!

- ♪ Hold me, hold me ♪

- This place we're going to, it's just like a dance studio?

- It's like a dancer's hub. - Ah.

♪ ♪

- Knock-knock. What up, champ?

- Oh!

- Hey.

- I brought the g*ng with me.

- Oh, my goodness.

- This is Pauly.

- Nice to meet you.

- You guys have met on FaceTime.

- Nice to meet you officially. - Yes.

- Nice to meet you. - Okay, so should we dance?

- Yeah, let's get started. - Are you guys ready to dance?

- I don't know. - I mean--

- I don't know about dancing.

Being back in the studio, it's very nostalgic.

But I'm a spectator today.

- Right, down, a-tap, tap, tap. Nice.

- This is exciting.

- You go one, two, three. Nice.

- I'm praying Vinny, like, goes--

- All the way. - Furthest.

Yes, I would die.

- Speaking of the devil, remember I was telling you,

Jenni, in the back of the van when we were in Solvang

about the guy, Vinny. - Not our Vinny?

- No, not our Vinny. - Yes.

- You guys are so cute together.

Are you considered exclusive? - No.

I'm like, I'm taking my time in life.

You know what? We're getting a little bit more serious.

- What are you doing, cooking? It smells good.

- Uh, I didn't even start yet, really, actually.

Things have been heating up between us,

and we're definitely moving along in our relationship.

He's from Staten Island, and, yes, his name is Vinny.

What are the f*cking odds of that?

[laughs] Oh, my God.

- There's so many other names in the world.

- I know. Why me?

- And you're dating Vinny from Staten Island.

- Why me?

- Oh, my God.

Like, what is happening?

Like, she literally was grinding

on our Vinny in the Carolinas.

- Oh. - Whoa!

- That's how you get pinkeye.

- You like him. Just say it.

- I've always liked him like that.

I would date Vinny, full-blown.

- Wow.

When did this become a thing?

- Are you, like, girlfriend-boyfriend?

- I wouldn't say that. Like, it's weird.

Like, we don't really wanna, like, put a label on things.

I mean, he's already got a toothbrush in my house

on his side, so I even say it's his side.

Think about that.

- Are you gonna bring him to NOLA?

- I don't know. I don't know.

What do you guys think I should do?

- Are you prepared for that introduction?

- And they're gonna ask him a lot of questions.

Just--I mean, they did that with Chris.

- You seem like a normal, normal guy.

Why do you like Angelina?

- We really do love each other.

- It's the last vag*na you're gonna have

for the rest of your life, though.

- It's real good, though. - [laughs]

- It's totally up to you,

whatever you feel comfortable with, you know?

- I don't know.

[hard rock music]

- Ready?

Again.

Are you nervous because they're watching you?

- Yo, let's let them do their thing.

Come here. Come with me real quick.

I think it's very important for Vinny

to properly promote himself

during this "Dancing with the Stars," so I have an idea.

- I always know when they act suspicious.

- This is his car, right? [laughs]

- Hopefully. Is this his car?

- We'll just hit up every car in the parking lot.

[laughs] Vote for Vinny!

- I think I'm gonna do "I have pinkeye" on this one.

- [laughs]

- One, two, three, and four.

- Go, chooch!

[laughs] So cool.

- I don't understand why he didn't

want us to come out here, man. - I know.

He's like, don't embarrass him.

We would never embarrass him.

- Oh, we're so low-key.

- Yeah.

- Uh...

Yo, wait, wait, we got a situation.

- What happened?

- I think you spelled your name wrong.

- Oh, sh*t.

- Oh!

- Wait, what?

- Is this fixable? - Of course.

I used to do this in school.

Feel me? - Okay, okay, okay.

Do you think he'll know we did it?

- Nope.

Does anybody know how to spell MVP?

- ♪ My cookie caught a million ♪

♪ The hills'll make you mad, man ♪

- Five, six, seven, eight.

One, two, three, and four.

- Did you wipe off the fingerprints?

- Uh-huh. - Okay.

- Look at what we just did, man.

- It's gorgeous.

- I miss my mom. [laughs]

I put "MVP" on the roof, man.

I just wasn't sure how to spell it.

- Where were you? - Oh, nowhere.

- Uh, we actually just went outside.

- Just went to freshen up.

- So suspicious.

They were up to no good.

- What are y'all getting into?

- I need you guys to teach me how to beat the beat.

- Oh, wow. - There's a little section--

- Wait a minute. Is she cool enough for this?

- Ah. - She passes the beat check.

- Wow. - She passed the beat check?

- Over on the East Coast, especially in Jersey,

you know, we don't pump our gas.

- We pump our fists. - Pump our fists.

Koko, let the fist pumpin' begin.

It's time to beat up the beat.

- All right, but just so you know, once we teach you this,

there's no going back.

- This is so cool!

- Start beating up the beat.

Just feel it.

- Right now we're building. - You just start on the floor?

[upbeat techno music]

- Wait.

- What's happening?

- We don't know what's happening.

- [laughs]

- We know we're about to beat it up.

Ready? - Is it now?

- And when you get through, the opportunities are endless.

- And then from here, you just go off?

- Yeah.

- And you just feel it.

Oh, oh, oh! - Go!

- Oh! - Go!

- Oh! - Go, go, go, go, go!

Go, go!

- M. - V.

- P. - K.

all: Let's go!

- Let's go.

- Who did this?

- Of all the nerve! Vandals! Vandals!

- What the hell?

- This is a rental. - Oh, look.

- DJ Pauly D. - Pauly D did not do this.

- Oh, okay.

- Did anybody see what went down over here?

Vandals. - Oh, sh*t.

- You can't park your car anywhere.

Vandals.

Do they have cameras out here? Vandals.

You never know. We should call the police.

- Yeah, we should.

- Yeah, but--but, Vinny, if you call the police,

man, don't-- I can't be around, man.

I'm a--I'm a prior felon. I'm a felon.

- The cops that come for you wear suits.

- Yeah, true, true. - Facts.

- ♪ Work something, girl ♪

♪ Let me see you move it, go ahead ♪

- I feel like going into this trip,

it's gonna be a lot better than San Diego.

- I'm f*cking not done!

- Well, actually, obviously,

you guys are on Twitter, right? - Yeah.

- I mean, Twitter is a big thing in this family.

- sh*t. - Hold on.

- Why? What did you do this time?

- But this time, it was not you, and it wasn't me.

Mike took it upon himself to insert himself

out of nowhere tweeting bad stuff about me.

What the f*ck?

[dramatic music]

Weeks ago, our episodes were airing.

- What are you doing?

- Oh, sh*t!

Oh, sh-- - Oh, my God.

- And Mike decided to start Twitter beef with me.

Oh, hell no.

Calling me a felon?

Saying I should have got arrested?

Like, are you f*cking kidding me?

A felon?

Oh, no.

Oh, f*ck no.

Mike, you like to f*cking, like--

like, do me dirty for some reason.

Like, I can't even call him a friend,

to be honest with you, anymore.

- I saw those tweets. - Yeah, I saw those.

- But then--but then they were deleted.

- You can't post something like that and then delete it

and then think I'm not gonna see it.

- I thought that we were all going

into this trip happy-go-lucky.

- You thought wrong, girl.

- Well. - Well.

- Oof.

Mike, I'm a little bit hungries.

- Yeah, right down the street, there's this place,

Fratelli's, Italian place.

- Ooh, Italian?

- Yeah, we get some ravioli and some cutlets.

- Now you're talking. - You know?

Listen, Big Daddy Sitch knows

a good Italian spot when I see one.

It's happening. We need a good ravioli.

- It's different out here, man.

- Yeah, it's hard to find good Italian on the West Coast.

- Fratelli's.

Leave it to Mike to find an Italian place in LA.

Let's go.

- Do you guys have chicken parm?

- What about meatball parm?

- Ravioli?

- Lasagna?

- Fettuccine? Linguine?

- Bro, this ain't Italian?

Stop it.

- Yeah, this is not Italian, man.

This is not an Italian restaurant, Mike.

This is a French café.

all: Oh.

- You know what? - So that's the vibe?

- Now that you say it, I'll try a little espresso.

[bird caws] - Whoa.

- Oh, snap. - Is that bad luck?

Dude, we don't need no bad luck today.

Mike, look that up, black crow.

That means something. - I think it does.

- Everybody keeps trying to take me down, like him,

and it just keeps not working.

So just bow out gracefully, m*therf*cker.

- "If you see a single black crow,

"this could be a sign from the universe

"that's telling you that things

are about to change in your life."

- [laughing] Oh, my God, bro.

I don't like this crow.

- Mike, you like to f*cking do me dirty, for some reason.

- Like, this is a sign. That's a bad omen.

Like, why did that crow come here right now?

Out of everybody they could have been, he was right there?

- Isn't he the one that's an actual felon

that didn't pay his f*cking taxes

and can't even vote for a president?

Let's not f*cking go there.

- This is not gonna end well.

Why can't we go into one trip happy?

♪ ♪

- ♪ Let's get on the floor ♪

♪ Get on the ground ♪

- I know we were expecting Italian.

But listen, don't give up on BDS yet.

I got something else up my sleeve.

- Something else?

- We all know that if you fail, you try, try again.

And we gotta stay true to our roots.

- Yeah. - And I gotta grab our pizza.

- Oh, my goodness.

- You guys have Mike "The Situation" pizza?

- Ah, look at that.

Well, Mike, you outdone yourself this time.

You promised me Italian, you got me Italian.

- When we saw that crow, I knew that we had to take,

you know, evasive action. - Yeah.

- BDS has gotta try me some before I buy me some.

- That's good? - Yep.

Pepperoni never taste so good.

- All right, no more bad omens then.

- No, it's over.

- We have to get ready for the show.

- ♪ I've been making millions ♪

♪ And I spend it on the dance floor ♪

♪ Every time I run out, I go out and I just make more ♪

- Do you guys wanna watch "Dancing with the Stars"?

both: Yeah.

- Yeah, and it's Disney night.

But the boys are there. Maybe we'll see them on TV.

Your bar, Deener!

- Oh, yeah, you guys haven't been--

- Are you insane?

This is a meatball's dream.

- Oh, you have mad alcohol.

I love that.

- This is my heaven.

I feel like I'm at Applebee's.

Cheers to Vinny.

- Cheers to... - Cheers.

- "Dancing with the Stars," Vinny.

[dramatic hip-hop music]

- ♪ Trying to reach another level ♪

♪ I'm not done yet ♪

- Mike, you just about ready?

- Yeah, man, I'm just doing last looks, maine.

- We're gonna be late for this chooch.

- You ready? - Yes, sir.

- Where you at?

- Oh, wow.

♪ ♪

- Yup. - Oh, damn.

- Yup, I was trying to be a little subtle tonight.

- I see that.

- My bruh. - Looking good, my man.

Fresh.

- You know, it's not every day

that we assemble in LA MVP-style.

So I'm like, you know what? - True.

- I kind of wanted to make a statement.

- That, you did.

I'm gonna be a little embarrassed because I'm gonna

be on live television as Vinny's friends

with this guy in that outfit.

Matching loafers.

- Exactly, yeah.

You ready? - Yeah, let's hit it.

- All right, let's get it. - Let's go.

You look like somebody I wanna beat up.

- ♪ And you know we runnin' ♪

- Guys, let's go around the room.

Ask genie for one wish.

- Wish Vinny to make it to the next round.

- You want me to do my personal or no?

- No, do personal first.

- Okay.

- You're not saying what it is?

- No, I'm not telling you.

- I kind of-- I wanted to blend in tonight.

- Oh. - Awesomely.

- Uh-huh. [laughter]

- Ew! Look at her. Ew.

- I wish for d*ck in my life.

- Oh, my goodness gracious, great ba*ls.

- Hello, we're here to see the chooch.

Oh, there's the chooch. - There he is.

- Okay, let's do it.

- Come on. - Turn this sh*t on.

- It's Vinny Guadagnino with his partner, Koko Iwasaki.

- Aw, Vinny! - Vinny!

- Aw.

- Oh, my God, he looks like a little boy.

[lively salsa music]

♪ ♪

- Perfect so far.

- This looks like a to me.

- Right?

♪ ♪

[cheers and applause]

all: Yay!

- Oh, gosh.

all: Ew!

- Vinny! - What is he wearing?

- Why is he our friend?

- I'm embarrassed.

What are you doing?

- He is not my friend.

He's c*ck-- like, who are you?

Who are you? You are not Pitbull.

Someone text him.

Like, he needs to remove the glasses.

- Take off the glasses.

- He's always hungry, and his shirt's hungry.

[laughter]

- Versace brings out the hater.

Your saltiness only seasons my sauce.

I knew that she was gonna try to betray me,

so I screenshotted the receipts.

- Her plan was you to attack her on Twitter?

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

all: Ew!

- Vinny! - What is he wearing?

- Why is he our friend?

- I'm embarrassed.

- Someone text him.

Like, he needs to remove the glasses.

- Take off the glasses. - You look silly.

- Now, Mike "The Situation" is here, and he was on the show.

Now, did he give you any advice coming in this week?

- Well, I would give him advice and be like,

yo, take your sunglasses off, bro.

[laughter]

- He called him out. Take them off!

- Take off your sunglasses, bro.

- Bruno Tonioli? - Seven.

- Hey!

- With a out of for Vinny and Koko,

you are not at the bottom of the leaderboard.

[cheering]

- Vinny!

- You did it.

Vinny could actually go to, like, the finals.

Like, he is getting through to every single week.

This is crazy.

- We can breathe.

- Thank God he didn't go home on Disney night.

I'd be so upset.

♪ ♪

- Yo, I can't wait to eat something, man.

- My man is safe, man. - Yo, MVP.

- He made it to another week because we were there.

The judges didn't want none of this.

- Yo, yo. - There he is!

[all cheering] There's my dancing queen.

- Oh, Mike's like-- am I--

- k*lled that, bro. - Am I gonna get beat up?

- You k*lled that. - Nah, bro.

- I feel like--I feel like I'm gonna get jumped.

I made it to week five of "Dancing with the Stars."

Mike went home on week four.

So I just beat Mike, and I wanna celebrate

with a banging dinner.

I'm trying to, like, just dance,

and all I saw was Mike's shirt.

- Yo.

- Mike looks like the Taj Mahal,

and not the real one, the one in Atlantic City.

You didn't come underdressed.

You know what I'm saying? - Yo, listen.

- Like--like, you came for costume night too.

- No, no, listen. Bro. [laughter]

- ♪ Yeah, secret weapon, I'm the cheat code ♪

- Bro, you deserve that comment.

- It's not every day that someone in the audience

comes in costume. - [laughs]

I just like when it goes well so I can post it on Instagram.

- This is your table, and your server, Kelsey,

will be right with you. - Thank you. Thank you.

Whoa!

Oh, sh*t, sorry.

- Yo, I'm trying to-- I'm trying to--

I'm trying to be subtle right now.

- Whoo. - Hi, guys.

- Hi. - How are you?

- How you doing? - Good.

- He's always hungry, and his shirt's hungry.

[laughter]

- Your shirt's loud.

- Um...

it's a beautiful shirt.

- Walk me through, like, the outfit process.

- Um, you invited us to front row...

- Okay. - Of "Dancing with the Stars."

So I was like, you know what?

I gotta go get a special outfit for this one.

I went to the Shore Hills.

- Classy. - Classy.

- He went to the mall for you. - I went to the mall.

I went to the Versace store, and I said,

show me your finest.

- Yeah, yeah. - Okay?

I'm like, what do you think is Situation's style?

And they were like, that one right there.

- Yeah. - [laughs]

They took you to the one no one bought.

Right. - Yeah.

They were like... - Say no more, fam.

- That one right there.

- How much was that shirt?

- Oh, wait, I got it. I got it.

$,. - No.

No. No, that's not it.

- Hey. - That's it.

- I mean, it sure looks like it.

- [laughs]

- Yeah, that's it.

- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, are those Versace?

- Yes, sir. - [laughs]

- I think I found the shoes too.

- The shoes aren't expensive.

Versace brings out the hater.

Your saltiness only seasons my sauce.

- It got a little--got a little quiet up in here.

- It got a little quiet. Mike, turn your shirt on.

[laughter]

- It's reversible, you know? - Really?

- No. [laughter]

- Keep 'em coming. Keep 'em coming.

Keep 'em coming.

- The patterns are a little hypnotizing

because it's from Biggie's "Hypnotize" video.

- Yeah. - [laughs]

- It is. Biggie wore this.

- Yeah, literally.

- Biggie literally wore this.

- Can I say something? - Of course.

- Sure. - Okay, literally, like,

this is probably one of the best nights of my life

because I'm with you guys,

obviously, I did well on the show,

and like, I've been going through this by myself.

You know what I mean? - Yeah.

- But, like, to have that and to see you guys there

and you guys taking flights and showing up for me...

- Yup. - It means the world to me.

Like, I'm gonna remember this night, like, forever.

- Hey.Salúd! - Let's go.

- The chooch can dance!

The chooch can dance! - Stop.

- All right, guys. - Head back?

- Let's go back to the crib.

- I gotta grab my stuff, pack up.

- All right, cool. - Yeah, we gotta pack up.

- I'm so full. - Oh.

I made a conscious decision not to wear socks

today with these loafers.

Oh, my God.

And I didn't put baby powder in them to avoid chafage.

- Beauty is pain. - Yeah.

I'm gonna have to hold my shoes and walk out.

- Bro, like, and I am so embarrassed right now.

Nobody wants to see that.

- Yo, the floors are, like, heated.

- [laughs] - People are eating.

It hurts to look good, man.

- I just got a nice pedicure too.

- Can't take this guy nowhere.

- You know you had a banger of a night

when you going home like this.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Babe, do you have the luggage?

- I'm trying to pack, like, the bare minimum

because usually I overpack.

- ♪ Always stuck in the middle ♪

♪ Get paid, get paid ♪

- Backpack, and I'm good to go.

- Oh, thank you. - I got you.

- And wine. - And wine.

- Things have been heating up

between me and Vinny, and he moved in with me.

- I feel like you're a little tense.

- Maybe a little more wine.

- I can crack open another bottle.

- I don't know what the future holds, but I am--

I'm definitely here for it.

I don't know. I just feel like

the last time I went to New Orleans--

- I never been there.

- Well, I went there once.

- Was it a good time?

- No.

- ♪ Dollar bills with our names on it ♪

♪ Gold chains full of rocks on them ♪

- Oh, my goodness. Hey, neighbor.

- Hi. - What's up? What's happening?

Good to see you. - Mr. Drama Starter.

- What are you talking about?

- The Twitter w*r with you and Ange.

- Mike took it upon himself to insert himself

out of nowhere tweeting bad stuff about me,

calling me a felon,

saying I should have got arrested.

Like, are you f*cking kidding me?

- I don't know what you're talking about.

What do you mean? - You're trying to bring

the smoke before our vacation.

- Hey, we all know Mike's insecure as f*ck.

- Yeah. - But I wanna know

why it's okay to go at me on Twitter

when he had nothing to do with the Pauly, Nikki,

and myself fight.

Mike and I just have not been getting along

in the past, like, year, you know?

And it's unfortunate that he tried

to pretend he was a friend, and he was, you know,

basically wearing a mask.

Don't do that.

Don't f*cking do that.

- Angelina is so upset right now.

- Angelina is upset about what?

- You called her a felon.

- It takes a felon to know a felony.

Technically, I just spit out facts.

And now you're telling me she's upset?

- Beyond upset. - Beyond upset?

- Like, flipping out.

- I'll be cordial with you, yeah,

but I'll never forget what you did.

And as far as his wife, she's pregnant.

I would never fight with a pregnant woman.

That is not me.

But this is the f*cking bed I have to sleep on!

- It is about me. - Oh, my God.

- No one's saying you have to sleep on that f*cking bed!

- Thank God!

Lauren, I don't give a f*ck!

- Listen to me.

- Don't talk to me like that.

Don't f*cking talk to me like that.

Lauren needs to step aside

because don't be your man's mouthpiece.

Your man's done enough.

He can speak for himself.

- I knew this might happen.

- I got upset, too, for her... - Okay.

- Because I was like, I don't understand

where all this like-- - Okay.

- Because you went hard.

- This was all Angelina's plan.

Angelina hit me up and said, let's tweet crazy,

because Angelina loves to fight with people.

I knew that she was gonna try to betray me,

so I screenshotted the receipts.

I knew she was gonna betray me, which facts.

She ended up doing, as we speak.

- Her plan was you to attack her on Twitter?

- It says right here, "Let's tweet crazy."

I said, if I say anything you don't like,

just text me and I'll delete it.

There's an agreement in place.

Then she--she--

- "I'm not the other girls. I can deal."

- Yes. "I'm not the other girls.

I can deal with it."

- Oh, my God, she literally told him to tweet

and that she can handle it, unlike the other girls.

Why is she playing the victim right now?

- That's what she does.

I've been saying it for a while,

and I don't mind going at it with her,

because I just know what I'm dealing with.

- Oh, God, please pray for me.

- Most of the time, these arguments

that you have with her, they don't make sense.

- No, they don't. - They just don't make sense.

Maybe she doesn't even remember

the conversation we even had.

- But sometimes you gotta be the bigger person.

- But I'm always the bigger person.

[indistinct shouting]

[dramatic choral music]

♪ ♪

- Warning, warning, warning. - No, no, no.

- Come on now.

- Like, I almost came here ready to fight you for this.

- Yo, yo, you got-- you gotta be careful

because the next thing you know it,

she'll eventually turn on you, I swear.

[tape rewinding]

♪ ♪

- That is f*cking insanity.

- I'm going home. I don't wanna do this anymore.

- You don't wanna f*ck with me.

- This is f*cking crazy.

- p*ssy-a*s f*cking clown f*ck.

- Why are you wanna fight with us?

- We got a situation.

[tape rewinding]

- No more tweeting, though, until we figure it out.

- No, I'm not talking to her.

- Okay. - I'm just taking a step back.

I refuse to utter this girl's name.

- Okay. - She's a lunatic.

- Yeah, okay. - Yeah.

- Okay. Cool.

Thank you.

I can't.

- Are you kidding me?

Like, you can't make this up.

- Hello, Bourbon Street!

Show me your t*ts!

- New Orleans, we are back.

And I don't know who this guy is, man,

but he's kind of a vibe.

- We had a conversation.

- I don't feel like dealing with this bullshit tonight.

Stop it!

- ♪ What a waste of cake ♪