05x24 - Dren

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ MTV ♪

- I really want to jump out and run across the field.

- I bet you won't.

- I'm going out in the field!

- Why do you think [bleep] people are contacting Mike?

Because my P is so good.

- That was about three guys at once.

I initially thought that nothing would ever happen

between Angelina and Vinny.

But I'm starting to see single Vingelina.

It's happening.

- Maybe I do have to try it.

- [spits]

- ♪ We went to a winery ♪

- [laughs]

[laughter]

- ♪ I like red ♪

[upbeat music]

- Yeah, buddy!

- Party's here!

- The Situation is under construction.

- We're so classy now.

- On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

- Get the frig out of here, you crazy!

- Um, hello?

- ♪ Time to show out, back ♪

♪ Go ahead, go ahead ♪

♪ Tell 'em, to break it, break it ♪

- I want to dance.

Let's go dance.

I want to dance. - Oh. Oh, no.

- You're such a mom.

You're, like, snapping.

- [laughs]

- Today was such a fun day.

We're still going at it.

[screams]

Get it, b*tch!

- [laughs]

Wait!

[laughs]

- It's longer!

♪ ♪

- Ooh, me-mo-mo.

- What the [bleep] is happening?

What is happening here?

- [shouting indistinctly]

- [laughs]

- What a nice meatball day.

♪ ♪

- ♪ Waking up in the sun ♪

♪ Life is paradise ♪

- I can't wait to see everybody.

I love doing these little vacations.

After Nikki's birthday celebration,

we're finally in San Diego.

Let's start this vacation.

If we're gonna be late for vacation,

a dirty birthday is the reason why.

- Who's ?

- You're .

- Good morning, honey.

- Good morning.

- Babe, we were a band last night.

- I got to get ready.

I need Tylenol, though.

So much happening.

- My boyfriend's coming!

My boyfriend's coming!

My boyfriend's coming!

Not literally.

Yo, Pauly's coming today.

And we have a lot to fill him in on.

What am I gonna wear today?

Can't wait to see that little tan guido.

Should I wear this gray T-shirt?

Should I wear this gray T-shirt?

Should I wear this gray T-shirt?

I don't know.

There's so many to choose from.

- Another day, another Jersey Shore Family Vacation.

This time, we're in San Diego!

Did they hear me?

- Yeah, I think they got you.

- Oh, yeah.

- How you doing, sir?

- Hello.

- We're checking in, please?

- I'll check you in right now. - Turn it off.

- DJ Pauly D?

- You got it.

- That's with a capital D.

I bet you never checked in

with a megaphone before.

Whoa.

What in the world?

- Why is it so messy? What?

Ew.

- [screams]

- What is happening?

What the [bleep] is happening?

- Where is everybody?

Where is everybody?

We are here.

And why isn't everybody up?

And how come I'm the only one yelling?

What the--oh, Snooki's phone.

Oh, she's gonna be looking for this.

We should hide it. She's a meatball.

She can't see up high. We'll hide it up high.

Let's put it right there.

Hide it in plain sight. - No, it's very obvious.

- Yeah, but she's small.

Meatballs are this high.

- Hello, San Diego!

- Is that Pauly?

- Hello, San Diego!

- Pauly?

- Whoa, there's my roommates!

- You guys just get here?

- Hi, Angelina! I like your new nose.

- Thank you!

Oh, my God, I haven't seen Pauly or Nikki in a long time.

But they definitely dodged a b*llet.

Like, thank God they came late.

- I'm [bleep] not done.

If I was them, I'd be so happy

that I didn't have to deal with this [bleep].

Good morning. - Hi.

I can't find my phone.

- What?

- I don't have my phone. - Did you look everywhere?

Where was the last place you remember having it?

Oh, let me-- - b*tch, I don't know.

- Yeah, I mean, we've been drunk the whole time

since we [bleep] landed.

- There's my meatballs.

- Hi. - Pauly!

- What's up?

- How are you? - What's up?

- Happy birthday. - Thank you.

- So I lost my phone. Have you seen it?

- Your phone?

- Yeah, it's missing.

- It's somewhere here.

- You sure it's in this room?

- I don't know.

- Oh. - Oh, here's my glasses.

- I can't believe you lost your phone.

- Where is it?

- Were you watching TV at all?

- Why? - Just wondering.

- [gasps] Oh, my God!

- Why is it up there?

You found it. You found it.

- It was under the pillow.

But I was like, if I put it up here,

meatballs can't see that high. - I can't reach it.

- Here you go. You got some cameos.

- It just [bleep] died.

[laughter]

- ♪ I'm gonna shake it off ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

- I'm still so tired.

[chuckles]

- I'm obsessed with greatness.

- That's the most disgusting--

don't you dare take them all at once.

- I'm excited for today.

- Pauly and Nikki are coming today.

- Oh, I'm so excited.

So excited to see Nikki. - I'm very excited.

- How come Angelina wears sexy lingerie when Vinny's here?

- They were flirting hardcore yesterday.

- No, I was not. - Like, talking about sex.

- They're both single.

- I think you guys should just do it.

- They already did, no?

- Why do you think [bleep] people are contacting Mike?

Because my P is so good.

- Maybe I do have to try it.

- What's the tea?

- Well, I mean, all these men are fighting over my vag*na.

There's a reason why, because I got that WAP.

- Oh, my God. - [laughs]

- WAP, means wet a*s [bleep].

- [bleep], yeah. It's--

- [laughs] - It's a thing. It's a thing.

- Angelina--she's all of a sudden got the WAP.

I'm like, what?

Never heard that before in my life.

- Like, the [bleep] cyclone. Like, it sucks you in.

And then once it sucks you in, you thing don't want

to come back out of it.

- Damn.

Her vag*na is like the Bermuda Triangle.

- If someone has got the WAP, someone else

is gonna co-sign that.

Where's the co-sign? Where's the receipt?

- Vinny is trying to downplay my vag*na.

I said, Vinny, give me a [bleep] break.

- Vinny's downplaying your vag*na?

- Vinny had that WAP.

He never mentioned it.

Funny.

[laughs]

- Girl, I've never heard somebody talk

about their vag*na this much.

- Power of the [bleep].

- Oh, my goodness. - Hey, what's up?

- Oh, damn, what's up.

It's my guy right there.

The godfather, man.

Missed you, my guy.

- Missed you too.

- She couldn't wait for you to get here.

- I know. - She couldn't wait.

- She was giving us the lowdown. Holy moly.

- There was a lot of fireworks on the first day, my guy.

A lot of fireworks.

- I was just telling him everything.

- Eventually we got to the root of everything.

It's the WAP. - She was telling us

about her [bleep] just before you walked in.

- And not only was three people coming after the WAP.

But when she went over overseas,

international waters, she said

everybody was after the WAP as well.

- That's the reason why Vinny's still single

because he had the WAP.

How long have you known her? - years.

- , years?

When have you ever seen her in sexy lingerie?

- I know. - Because Vinny's here.

- They were really flirting. I'm telling you.

- I mean, he hasn't seen it in years.

I'm wiser, older, better.

- When you think about it, her WAP is in every vacation.

Even in Miami, the whole period [bleep]

came from her WAP.

- Every single thing in life

just goes right back to the WAP.

- I done lost my Chapstick.

Is it in there?

[laughter]

- Oh, my God.

Maybe that's where the beach is.

- Where's the beach?

- It all got sucked up in here.

- All got sucked up in the cyclone.

- No wonder why I feel a little heavy some days, damn it.

- Oh, my gosh. Anyway-- all: Hey!

- What the hell?

- God, I've missed you.

- Are you still in your pajamas?

- Yeah, I gotta change. - Same, okay.

- We just had a two-hour conversation about her WAP,

and he can't find better.

- Morning.

- It's safe to say that everything I miss

on this vacation so far has to do

with Angelina's vag*na, and I'm all caught up.

[laughs]

I just can't believe that it all came down to the WAP.

- She had guys crying over it, bro.

- That guy housesitting?

- Hi, are you in my garage?

- Wait. Time out.

She's FaceTiming a guy at her house in the garage.

- She got a dude staying at the house right now.

- I know. - Give me the first letter.

- V. - V?

Is it Vinny?

[laughs] Stop.

- His name is Vinny. - His name is Vinny.

- You got to be [bleep] me.

- Of course it is. Just admit it.

Just admit it, girl.

You want this D.

- No, thank you.

- Hey.

- Hi, everyone.

- All right, so I was thinking, for today, guys,

we go to a wildlife preserve.

- Bunch of animals going to see the animals.

- So it's called Lions, Tigers, and Bears.

both: Oh, my. - Stop lying.

- A wildlife preserve. - Feed the guidos.

- Hey, we feed Vinny to the lions.

- I agree.

I think we feed Vinny to the lions.

- Angelina's going in lingerie.

- [bleep] yeah.

[upbeat music]

- Angelina, stop, bro.

- We're gonna have to pack a little bag.

- Okay, you could do backpack because I only have mini bags.

- Angelina, get out of here.

[bleep]... - Your room.

- You're thirsty.

- [laughs]

- You're thirsty for me.

- You know you want it, dumbass.

Yeah?

- What are we doing?

- We are going to pack a cooler with beverages.

I love planning.

It's like my best thing.

Honestly, I would probably be a party planner

if I wasn't here.

- Ew.

- We have to empty this.

- It looks like piss water.

- Yeah, we have to empty this.

- Where? - I guess outside.

- In the tub?

- Of course we're gonna bring drinks

because, you know, who doesn't like a nice wine?

- Ow.

- This is going to be a friggin' blast.

- Oh, [bleep]!

Deena.

- I didn't realize there was glass in there.

- Oh, look, there's a drain.

Oh, my God.

How perfect!

- Look at that.

- Awesome.

- We did God's work today.

[burps]

- Oh, I smell a hot dog.

- My burp?

Ew.

- I thought it was from the baseball stadium.

- I just burped.

- Ooh, I smell a hot dog. [laughter]

- Somebody is having a snack, and his name is Meatball!

- [screams]

Welcome to the meatball crew.

- Happy birthday, Nikki! - Happy birthday, Nikki!

[all cheering]

- You should put that on your lap, like a gentlemen.

- Ooh, thanks.

- Who done call me?

- You're calling Jionni.

- [snorts] Babe.

- Dren is at full force right now...

- Oh.

- And she is a savage.

- Give me that titty, b*tch.

- Yeah, get her.

- ♪ Move, move, pick up the shoes ♪

♪ Go and step to this rhythm, I'll be blowing your roof ♪

- All right, now we have to go and get ice.

- Ow! You pushed me.

- Ice.

[screams]

- So guys, it's Nikki's birthday,

and I want her to feel like part of the family.

So I made her a scrapbook.

- Very cute.

- You would do this.

- things we love about you

and things you should know about Pauly.

- Is this gonna cause a fight?

- No, it's, like, funny stuff, like he's loud.

- Well, that's a given.

- And then I figure we could all...

- Oh, my God.

- Add something else into it.

- I want a [bleep] scrapbook. - Yeah, me too.

- [bleep]. - Yeah, me too.

Why didn't I ever get a scrapbook?

- You give Nikki a scrapbook and not me a scrapbook?

- I want one. My scrapbook-- I want my own scrapbook.

- You guys are giving me a headache.

"I want a scrapbook. I want a scrapbook.

I should have had a scrapbook."

Just sign the [bleep] scrapbook.

- Must be nice to get a scrapbook.

- Very pretty. [laughs]

- I literally just want you to punch me.

- Are you gonna backhand me again?

- Oh, my God.

[screams]

- I'm having a drink.

- Oh, God.

- Yeah, there's vodka in the cooler.

- There's vodka right here.

- So who's Vinny from Staten Island?

- She's FaceTiming a guy at her house in the garage.

- How's the WAP?

- Don't [bleep] ask that, Vinny, [bleep].

- Is he a good lay or is he a good person?

There's a difference. - He's actually both.

- Is he hot?

- He's jacked-- he's jacked as [bleep].

But right now I'm just--

I'm just not at that point

of actually seeing a future with anyone right now.

Right now I'm gonna enjoy myself.

- And that's when the best part happens.

Live your best life.

- I get [bleep] pictures in there.

I get guys--

- Oh, my God.

- I'm like, your [bleep] don't even look good.

- That's not hot.

- Nasty. - Sick.

- Somebody's sending Angelina [bleep] pics.

- What the [bleep]?

- I don't want to see it!

- Jenni.

[laughter]

- My grandmother always taught me--

she's like, [bleep] are ugly.

They look like aliens.

You know what I mean?

- But vaginas are nasty too.

- Everything's nasty.

- It's so true.

- It's like sea creatures.

- [laughs]

- There he is.

- Oh, hi, Chris.

Is there alcohol in that cup?

- What's up, losers? - Ugh.

- Everybody coming from here, did you miss me?

- Stop!

[megaphone blaring]

- Can we burn that thing?

- There's a Sorrentino.

- Is that food?

- Onto the animals now.

- Yeah. - Let's roll.

- I can't tell if it's warm or cold here.

- Cold. - Can I have the front?

I like the front because I puke everywhere.

- We'll see you guys at the sanctuary.

- Do you think bears like meatballs?

- Bears might like meatballs.

- [gasps]

I don't want to die.

- That's so [bleep] weird.

- How did you meet him?

- Instagram.

He's only .

- No way.

- What?

- Did you bring us out here to k*ll us?

Where the [bleep] are we? - [laughs]

- The sanctuary.

Whoo!

- We're here.

- Tigers and Bears. Oh, my.

- Oh, look at that tiger.

- Oh, my God. - Oh, he's beautiful.

- Is this the Jungle Book?

- We're in Africa.

- Holy [bleep].

This is, like, legit.

- You guys ready to see the tigers?

- Yes. - Oh, my God.

- Oh, sick.

[low growling]

Wow, look at them.

- Oh, my God.

- Wait, where do I pee?

In a bush?

- Oh, look at that tiger. - Where?

- [roars]

- Oh, it's white.

- Hi, Deena.

both: Nice to meet you.

- Thank you for having us today.

- Whoa, why is he looking at me like that?

He's hungry.

- Mom. - Welcome out here.

This is Lions, Tigers, and Bears.

We are an accredited exotic animal sanctuary.

Being a sanctuary, we are here because we rescue animals

from neglect, unwanted abuse situations,

people that buy animals illegally or legally.

We're gonna kind of get going on a visit,

and we'll meet a lot of the different animals

that have come from really poor situations,

and we've been able to give them a forever home.

Are you guys ready to meet the first two tigers?

- Yeah. - Yeah?

Okay.

- Lions, Tigers, and Bears Sanctuary--

this place is huge.

This is no zoo.

It's an actual habitat.

- Nola is the white tiger.

Mocha is the orange tiger.

And she is definitely the more dominant, as you can see.

She's up at the front. He's staying in the back.

He's respecting her decision... - Oh, so she's the boss.

- To be the feeder right now. - The power of the P, right?

Even in the jungle, the power of the [bleep] conquers all.

- We're gonna go in right about mouth level to her,

get the fork points through the same piece of chain link.

- Are you hungry?

Go, D!

[tiger growls] - Ooh!

- Whoa!

- Got it.

- Okay, we're gonna head down

to the black bear habitat next.

- She's got the cooler in the back.

- Black bears are omnivores,

so they eat a diet similar to ours.

They eat a lot of fruits, vegetables.

So we're gonna head over here to our right-hand side.

- Whoa, look at that bear.

They're huge.

- He's [bleep] massive.

- Oh, God.

- I'm sweating.

- Okay, if you look to your right-hand side,

somebody is having a snack, and his name is Meatball.

- [screaming]

- Meatball! - What the hell?

- Look at is-- aww, he's so cute.

- They're healthy bears.

- He was a bear that was a nuisance--

- Meatball! - Called a nuisance bear.

- Oh, my God. That makes sense.

- It's called a nuisance bear.

- [laughs] I bet you he can drink,

and he can be a good time.

- He was going down the streets in a neighborhood.

He was getting in trouble.

- No, no.

- Come here. - Why?

- I'm taking you back inside. - [crying] No!

- So he was drunk and acting disorderly.

Yeah, he was a troublemaker.

- Get the [bleep] off. Get off.

The fact that the bear's a nuisance and we are--

I mean, welcome to the meatball crew.

- Party's here.

- ♪ Wow, wow, wow, wow ♪

♪ Ooh, you know you bad ♪

♪ Talk, talk, talk, better handle that ♪

♪ Haters get out of line ♪

♪ Don't let us stop your stacks ♪

- They love a sweet treat sometimes.

So we're gonna make some peanut butter and jellies

for them to feed.

We're gonna test your peanut butter and jelly skills.

I think we should do a relay race.

- Relay race. Yeah.

- Okay, line up here in the front.

- A race. - Are we racing?

- I can't even "bear" to watch. [chuckles]

- One, two, three, go!

[all shouting]

- Everybody is scrambling.

You can tell who's actually made a peanut butter and jelly

sandwich and who hasn't.

- Go, baby, go!

- Clearly, Nikki's made them before--too good

that she's taking her time with it.

But this is a race. Give me that knife.

I need to go a little bit faster than that.

[indistinct shouting]

- Come on, Team Buckner!

- Come on, Mom.

Snooki, Snooki.

- But I'm a mom, and I know how to make

these [bleep] really quick.

- Snooki, Snooki.

- Go b*tch, go b*tch! - Whoa!

Whoa! We win!

[all cheering]

- Boom, the sandwiches are done in seconds.

And hi, we win.

Thank you.

- We have the winners right here.

[all cheering]

- Babe, you took too long on your sandwich, man.

- Here you go.

- So we are feeding Blossom right now.

- Can I go inside the cage and everybody feed me?

- [laughs]

- I'm hungry.

- Mike is drooling right now.

He's so jealous that the bears get to eat this

but he doesn't.

[laughs]

- If I was a bear, y'all could feed me fettuccine,

diet sodas, funfetti cupcakes, chicken fingers, bangers.

Big Daddy Sitch would love to be one of these bears.

And sit back in the cage, get loved up on.

Wow, I can see it now.

Big Daddy Sitch at the Sanctuary.

We got a good situation.

- So guys, I do have one more surprise.

- Ooh, really?

- All right, let's go.

Seems like group chat

is the problem with all of the issues

that are happening.

- I'm sending it to the squad right now

because I am shooketh.

- It was our group chat. Deena started it.

- It all stems from group chat beef.

[message notification]

- What the hell?

I'm gonna have to send this to the squad.

- So I called Lions, Tigers, and Bears

to see if they can help me come up with a funny way

to just end it.

I saw that you have beef in a box.

- They're called Enrichment Boxes for the animals.

- If you could put "Group Chat" on the box--

- Group Chat?

Oh, my God.

- So guys, the tigers are going to

basically tear apart a box.

I put "Group Chat" on it.

Since Angelina is not in it, we put all of our beef

in this box. - The beef? Get it?

- And tigers destroy this [bleep] beef for good,

and we kumbaya and move on. - Thank God.

all: Yes!

- Walking up to this whole thing

that Deena set up, where it's group chat

and there's tigers and meat inside.

I'm like, yes, [bleep], God, thank you.

[bleep] you, group chat. I can't stand you.

I hate you.

- Oh, my God!

Oh, it's happening.

Oh, no, group chat!

- Oh, my God.

- Oh, my God.

- Group chat, no!

- Group chat is down!

- I [bleep] hate group chat.

I hate it.

- Is that Angelina going after group chat?

- Yes, that is.

- That's a Wet a*s [bleep] destroying the group chat.

- Right now, the symbolism of the [bleep] meat

and the [bleep] and the box and all that [bleep]

means that group chat is done.

- Yo.

It's all--all about the WAP.

- Power of the [bleep]!

- This is awesome.

That's exactly what needed to be done so we can move on

and have fun on this trip.

- Bro, that [bleep]'s soaking wet.

- It always is.

[laughter]

That's why it's the [bleep] WAP.

[low growling]

- ♪ And I remember summertime, you and I ♪

- Oh, wait, you have to wait for Vinny.

- Oh, [bleep] it.

- All right, we're all here.

- Vinny is taking a [bleep].

- Of course he is.

- That was so nice.

- Deena, that whole entire group chat thing--fire.

- The beef was put behind us.

Group chat was literally destroyed

by a bunch of tigers.

- Oh, my God!

- Group chat, no!

- When we get back, let's start getting ready.

I booked a really fancy restaurant

for Nikki's birthday.

We want to do something special for Nikki

because she is turning .

Super bougie.

You know, is a big one.

- You guys changing?

- Yeah, it's a really fancy place.

- I don't want to dress up.

- I don't want any trouble.

So hopefully, Dren will behave.

- Deena, show your tit. - No.

- ♪ Way too high, living my life ♪

♪ All them naysayers ♪

- I'm going to get the kids, so I'll see you at dinner.

- [screams, laughs]

- I smell like a grizzly bear.

- We just got back from the animal sanctuary.

There were some tigers playing in the water.

- Bye, babe, we're gonna go shower.

- Speaking of wet-a*s [bleep].

- Let me get a shower. - Pauly's going to shower.

- Let me get a shout-out, man.

- See you later. - Do you want a water?

- No. - Do you want a wine?

- Yeah.

- Wha!

- [spits]

I just threw up all over my t*ts.

- Everyone's getting ready.

Nicole and I are like, [bleep] this.

We're the dirty stay-outs. We want to drink.

- Cheers.

- We don't need to take forever to get ready.

You know what I'm saying?

I mean, I do, but--

- No.

- This is the first time we're drinking my rosé.

Messy mama's here.

- And now it's gonna take control over me.

- You're chugging the whole thing?

Angelina, you're not even appreciating

the taste of my wine.

- I mean, I'm [bleep] bombed.

Yeah.

I can drink you under the [bleep] table.

- Let's do it.

[burps]

Congratulations.

We could both drink a lot.

But I hold my own.

And I drink very well.

- You look like a beetle.

- [laughs]

You drink very well but then you become Dren.

- [spits]

- [laughing]

- ♪ That, that, that, that ♪

♪ That move ♪

- That girl...

Is sissy coming?

- No, Aunt Nicole leaves tomorrow.

CJ, Bromeo, Cameron, and Vinny, the fourth kid.

- Oh, yeah, he needs a girlfriend.

- You know what?

Angelina's single.

So maybe they can date.

- Oh, my God.

Who were you hanging out with this weekend?

I am praying to all the gods in the universe,

please, do not say anything to Angelina.

- Can we go to the rooms now and get ready?

- I'm not changing.

- You have to change out of this

because you wore this today.

She's in the same clothes.

I mean, all day.

[bleep].

- Snooki, Snooki.

- She's sweating.

- I'm not wearing a [bleep] gown.

I'm not changing.

I'll just wear this.

Why are we getting dramatic?

- I got to [bleep] get ready.

I don't want to stink.

[bleep] no.

Come on.

- [snorts] Come on, partner.

- Can I have a key?

Is your door open over there?

- No, it's locked. - Can you help me?

She doesn't want to get dressed.

She wants to stay in that. I said no.

- I'm not changing.

- Angelina and Nicole are wasted.

They haven't even started getting ready yet.

- Just wear that.

Whatever you want to wear.

I just want tonight to be

a great, great time.

And now I'm worried.

- I'm locked out. I'm homeless.

- Yeah.

- Come on, let's go, let's go, let's go.

- We have company.

- Sorry, Chris. - Buckner?

Hey, we're locked out.

We're homeless [bleep].

- Oh, my God.

If you're that dramatic,

I'm leaving.

I didn't think she was that dramatic about spilling.

- Dren is definitely making an appearance

for the first time since the Poconos.

- Whoo!

- Oh, [bleep].

[hip-hop music]

- Oh, my God!

♪ ♪

- I'm running, you whorebag.

- I have no idea what's gonna happen from here.

- Now I'm annoyed. - Why?

- Because I would never say you can't spill in my room

like I'm Michael Jackson.

- [laughs]

- You can't spill in my room.

Oh, my God.

You spilled. [gasps]

Ah, I'm spilling. - I'm pissed at you.

- [bleep]. - I'm not happy about this.

- I'm gonna get arrested.

both: h*! h*! h*! h*!

- [singing]

- I got to pee.

- I'm not changing.

This is me. This is--this is it.

- [laughs]

- ♪ Freak, freak, freak, freak, freak ♪

♪ That girl was a freak ♪

[upbeat music]

- ♪ I want it all ♪

♪ I want the best and nothing at all ♪

- Is your door open over there?

- No, it's locked.

- What the [bleep]?

- Do you want to go get a key? - Let's do it.

Come on.

- All right, let's go downstairs.

We'll get a drink.

One thing I hate about hotels is, if you ever get locked out

of your room or the room key doesn't work,

you literally have to now go into the [bleep] elevator,

go all the way downstairs.

"Hi, can I have another room key?"

[bleep] that [bleep].

They need to come up with a...punchy thing.

- Going down. - Going down.

- I don't want a water.

- Watch your [bleep] leg.

- Wait, I'm dancing.

Go down on the P. Go down on the P.

Can you press it?

All right, we're good.

- [laughs]

- Oh, my God.

Go!

- Go on. - [screams]

- Well, I guess she's not my friend.

Let's just go out.

- Can I get a room key?

- I would love fun.

Let's do a vodka shot.

Let's get [bleep] up.

- No, no, no shot. Oh, [bleep].

We're doing a shot.

I don't know how I'm gonna accomplish

getting ready right now.

It's really hard to do basic [bleep]

when Nicole is this wasted.

- Yeah, but you love me, right?

- I do love you. - You would die for me?

Can you kiss my cheek?

You love me.

- Cheers.

- Thank you!

- Let's go to the [bleep] main desk.

Hello?

We got locked out of our rooms.

Can we get our room keys?

- Yeah, for sure. For sure.

- Thank you. - Oh, my God.

We're getting out there.

- Let's go this way.

- No, it's this way. - Thank you.

- I'm going this way. - It's this way.

- I'm going this way, you [bleep].

- No, you can't-- you can't go there.

- ♪ Hands down, we the hottest people ♪

- Angelina, where you going?

- Come on.

- ♪ Oh, it's going down ♪

- Ange!

- ♪ I dare you ♪

- ♪ We're up here in paradise ♪

♪ Let me swim in your love ♪

♪ ♪

- I'm trying to fix that one right there, man.

th birthday is a big deal.

They're a really big milestone in someone's life,

so it better be perfect.

What about these sneakers, man?

Yeah, buddy.

- Where are you gonna go? - [laughs]

I told you I was dressing fancy tonight.

It's Nikki's birthday.

She's turning , and I am just so excited

to do a nice fancy dinner.

Are you gonna get changed or are you staying in this?

- You're pretty.

- Thank you.

Not everybody's dressing up.

It is fancy.

So they're probably gonna look a little less fancy,

but it's fine.

Hi, Vin. - Hey, what's up?

- You're not ready yet?

Oh, you're ready?

- Yeah.

- This is a fancy place.

- I don't have any fancy clothes.

- It's gonna be a good night, regardless

of what people are wearing.

- I feel like is like a big birthday, you know?

- Yeah, no, you should definitely

celebrate your friends' birthdays,

when you're with them around the time of their birthday.

- I'm sorry, Vinny.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Ow.

Oh, I got it.

You know--listen, I'm drunk.

Whatever.

I'm just saying.

Vin, will you have a drink?

- Starving.

- Everybody's all ready?

- Except for Angelina, I think.

- It's guacamole!

- [laughs] Nicole!

- Thank you.

- Nicole, what are you doing?

You're spilling liquor all over the floor.

- Wait. Have you met Dren yet?

- I'm sorry that I'm like spilling.

Sorry.

- I think you're getting wet.

- I know.

I'm not perfect.

- Nicole has left the building,

and now Dren has entered,

and Dren wasn't invited to this party.

You can't make eye contact with Dren.

You'll get snapped on.

- I'm spilling everywhere.

- Dren is definitely coming out.

That is for sure.

I did this because I wanted Nikki

to have a special birthday, and hopefully Dren will behave.

- Don't look at me. - [laughs]

- I'm a mess.

- I like Vin with the hat on.

- They look like a couple.

- They look pretty good together.

- [laughs]

- Now they're laughing and giggling.

- It looks like they're on a date.

What is happening right now?

- [screams]

- [laughs]

- [screams]

[screaming]

[upbeat music]

- ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

- How is that guacamole? - Yummy.

- Hello? - Let's go, girl.

all: San Diego takeover!

- That was wack.

- I liked it. - Terrible.

- All right, guys, I'm gonna see you later at dinner.

I got to get them in the shower, tubby, bath, to bed,

and I will see you later.

- ♪ Rock a rose gold chain ♪

♪ With my suit and tie ♪

- Deena, you look great. - Thank you.

- I was about to be like, when was the last time

we was on the streets like this?

But we did this in El Paso.

- That's right.

- ♪ Living, everybody party, party, party ♪

- Hello.

- Hi. - We have a reservation.

Hey, how are you doing?

This restaurant is a vibe.

The best part is my family is supporting Nikki.

Now they're having a birthday dinner for her.

It really means a lot to me.

- Happy birthday, Nikki.

all: Happy birthday, Nikki.

- Are you the youngest one?

- Zach.

- Oh, Zach is the youngest one.

- ♪ With the bass down low, bring it ♪

♪ Bring it down slow ♪

♪ With the bass down low ♪

♪ Bring it, bring it down slow ♪

♪ With the bass down low ♪

♪ Bring it, bring it down slow ♪

[cheers and applause]

- Today's feeling really dope.

Nikki is feeling the vibe.

She loves birthdays just as much as I do,

and this is so much fun.

- Whoo! Whoo!

- Whoo!

- Another one.

Gonna get dirty!

- Oh, my God! Wait!

- Hats off to Deena.

She k*lled it at this birthday dinner.

- Whoo!

[cheers and applause]

[all cheering]

- It's their birthday too.

Happy birthday over there.

- Nikki, are you getting any appetizers?

- Do you want me to order? I got it.

- Do you even know the appetizers that are on this--

- They have the same fight at every meal.

- Because Mike orders the whole thing for himself.

[laughs]

- I'm a great food orderer.

- Can we let Vinny take control of this?

I want to see it.

- Ooh, Angelina wants her man to take control.

- I like Vin with the hat on.

That's my thing.

- We're friends-- we're friends now.

- It seems like you guys are okay now.

- They could have sat anywhere they wanted to.

They migrated to each other.

- Pauly, this has been every-- every time.

- Everyone wants Vinny and I to hook up again.

Let's face it.

- I took a photo of them, and they look--

- They look like a couple.

- They look pretty good together.

- I think he's gonna go in for the kiss.

- This one for the books, I'm telling you, bro.

- This is definitely the most intrigued he's been.

- And since she's giving that WAP to everybody,

he might as well get a piece.

- Can't you see it on my face? - I got a great one.

- ♪ You were so cute when you were doing that thing ♪

♪ With so-and-so... ♪

- Is it strong?

- It tastes like a birthday in a cup.

- Oh, you're gonna be drunky.

- Oh, my goodness, honey.

You look hot.

Baby number two tonight.

- But see--see--but see, why do you have to say it out loud?

Why do you have to go there?

- Because they push it,

and then what do you want me to say?

- I know, but like, that's like, stupid.

Like...

- I'm dying to know what's happening over there

in that conversation. - Weird. It's so weird.

- Vinny and Angelina-- they are actually

getting along right now.

It looks like they're on a date.

And I'm like, this is-- what is happening right now?

- Eh.

[ding]

Sorry.

Just put that on your lap, like a gentleman.

- Ooh, thanks.

How come y'all's water looks so crispy and mine looks black?

- I don't know. Mine looks amazing.

- I want ice and [bleep].

- You want me to get you a new one?

- [laughs]

- Now they're laughing and giggling.

- Vinny's single. Angelina's single.

Vinny had sex with Angelina, and it might happen again.

I don't feel like there's anything wrong with it.

So why wouldn't they?

- [laughs] Ah.

- ♪ Let's go ♪

♪ Honey, it's gold, all money ♪

- I let everybody know that I was coming to the party late.

My kids are asleep.

So walking into this party,

I finally have a weight lifted off my shoulders.

Hi.

- Hey. - Hey.

- Hi!

- You made it back!

- Made it.

- Boo.

- You made it, boo.

- Hi.

- It's not very good? - She's good.

They're going to bed.

Nicole is not here, but Dren is,

in probably the nicest restaurant in San Diego.

- Deena, can we dance?

I want to dance.

Let's dance.

[babbles]

[buzzer]

[screams]

- ♪ Walk on by if you want ♪

♪ Came here to play with the funk ♪

- Watch out for the birthday girl.

- This place is crazy.

Nikki's having a blast.

- I like this.

- Vinny and Angelina look

like they're on a date.

- Enough apps for the table?

So we don't want to get--

- Oh, my God.

What are you doing?

Did you see that?

- That was like a schoolgirl.

- Like what the--

- She's like, "My man's gonna order for me."

- Oh, my God.

- I'm gonna die.

I'm leaving.

I'm gonna go make friends.

- Okay. - I love you.

- Love you.

- Dren is out and about, people.

She is ready to explode.

- She told me, "I'm gonna go meet new friends now.

Bye." - Oh.

- Can I have a drink?

- Yes. - Oh, God.

- I was gonna go check on her,

but she's just gonna tell me

to go [bleep] myself. - Same.

- Yeah, basically. So I don't--I wouldn't.

- I would love a dirty martini.

- All right.

- You're my best friend.

Oh, my God!

Are you my brother?

Who done call me in?

- What is that?

- Wow, look at that edamame.

- Ooh.

- I'm hungry.

You guys are weird.

I'm sorry, ma'am.

- This food is good.

- That's delish.

- Oh, my God. Let's share.

- Come on.

Stop being bashful.

- Where is she?

Where's my best friend?

- You know?

- How may I help you?

- I'd like to get a large pie.

[laughs]

- A large pie for delivery or pickup?

- Yeah, just show your titty.

- I just want her to eat.

- Yeah, I know.

- Right now, we have to feed Dren.

I'll be right back.

And I have to contain the beast.

I got you a salad.

- Thank you.

- Where have you been?

- Thank you.

I have to--

- Okay, can you eat? Here, let's sit.

Oh, my God. It's time to go.

We need to [bleep] figure out

how to get this one out of here.

Who are you on--

You're calling Jionni.

- [snorts] Babe!

[phone ringing]

- It's normal.

So normal with her.

I have not seen this Dren in a hot minute.

Okay, semi-normal.

Dren is at full force right now.

You want to sit back with us?

Let's go.

And she is a savage.

- Don't look at her.

She's sexy.

- Get it, get it, get it. Get it.

- Whoo!

- All right, she's partying.

- You're pretty.

You're pretty.

- Oh, man.

Nicole is on one tonight.

She's not sitting at the table.

She's been gone.

Like, Snooki want smush smush.

- Yeah, I'm gonna go talk to my friends.

[both laughing]

- Thank you.

- It smells like a fish.

It smells like a [bleep] fish.

- They have sushi.

But your salad right there is very good.

- No, it smells like a fish.

- Don't call Jionni right now.

- I'm not trying. - You're trying.

- I'm eating.

[laughs]

So put it in my mouth, b*tch.

- Oh, damn. - Asparagus with bacon.

Asparagus with bacon.

Fire.

- I'm feeding Nicole the same way I just fed

the tigers and bears and [bleep].

- She may just get a little upset,

and it causes a scuffle that we don't

really want to encourage.

- h*, h*, h*, h*, h*, h*, h*!

- Oh, my God.

What is going on?

This is, like, a friggin' nightmare.

Oh, my God.

- Did anybody order pizza here?

- Heyo!

- We have so much food over here,

and somebody ordered a pizza.

- Right here. Thank you.

- Who ordered a pizza? - Oh, my God.

[laughs] Nicole just ordered a pizza?

- Bam. - In a steakhouse?

- Get it, girl.

- I don't even think BDS would do that.

- Oh, damn. - Well done.

- Damn.

- Thank you, Vinny.

Thank you, Vinny.

- I don't really understand

what Nicole is saying right now.

I'm just like hoping that she just

stops talking to me, because when you talk to Dren,

you might end up in a fight with her or something.

- [screams, laughs]

[buzzer]

- When Dren is here, it's best to stay clear.

- Listen! I am...

I love my life!

Stop!

Oh, [bleep].

- Oh, my God.

- She's good.

- I'm offended.

[bleep] me! [bleep] me!

- Watch the drink.

Watch the drink. Watch the drink.

Oh, [bleep].

- Give me that titty, b*tch.

- Yeah, get her.

- Give it to me! Give it to me!

- This is a birthday that I will never forget.

No, that's not your water.

- Oh, my God.

It's like chasing a toddler.

- None of this is yours.

- Stop. I live here.

Whoa.

All right, so... [babbling indistinctly]

- I feel like I'm in a Coen brothers movie.

- Sit down. - I am sitting down.

- Like, where am I?

What is happening?

But this is definitely very entertaining.

- [babbling indistinctly]

♪ ♪

- Ow!

[shouting] [laughter]

Ow!

- Lift her up.

- [laughs]

- I'm offended.

I'm offended.

- [screams] - I think she bit me.

- Oh, my God! [laughter]

- Angelina and Vinny are flirtatious.

- Something's brewing there.

- I'm not gonna lie, I'm kind of intrigued.

- This is, like, a Staten Island

version of "The Notebook."

- Vinny and Angelina

are gonna make out on a gondola.

- Oh! [all shouting]

- Oh, my--