04x19 - Mr. P

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ MTV ♪

- Hello? - Hello?

- Chris.

- Listen, I'm gonna come by tomorrow,

and we gotta talk about a couple things.

- I'm pretty positive this is Angelina and the videos.

- [bleep]. - Oh, it's her.

- [bleep].

- Oh, my God.

- It's gonna be really messed up if Chris finds out

on a video on TMZ.

- What the [bleep] goes on in that girl's life?

- All right, so I'm gonna come by tomorrow,

and we're gonna talk.

- [stomping foot] Oh, my God.

Lord, help me, Jesus.

- ♪ Get crazy, get wild, let's party ♪

- Yeah, buddy!

- ♪ If you want to have fun ♪ - The Situation

is under construction.

- This might not have been the best idea.

- We're so classy now.

- On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

- Get the frig out of here, you crazy.

- Um, hello?

- ♪ If you want to have fun and do something crazy ♪

- ♪ Is that all you got? ♪

♪ Yeah, I know you got one question ♪

- What's up, babe? What are you up to?

- I am looking for places for our next family vacation.

I kind of narrows it down to Poconos.

- Nice. Not too far.

- Yeah, it's like two hours away.

So, I'm taking charge of this planning,

because I'm going to make sure this is the best vacation,

even better than Lake Las Vegas,

'cause I'm gonna make sure there's so many things to do.

I want everybody to bring everybody that they love.

This is going to be the biggest vacation ever.

- Hello, Pennsylvania Inn. How may I help you?

- Hi. I was calling-- - Hi!

- Hi, I was calling 'cause I wanted to book a trip.

What do you guys have for kids to do?

- Our hotel is an adults-only. - All right.

Do you have a barber shop?

- We do not have a barber shop.

- That means you would be cutting your hair.

- We'll call you right back. - All right.

Just trying to make sure the food is good.

Like, how's the chicken tenders?

- We're a fully vegan resort. - Oh.

- Oh, my God. Are you kidding?

- Ugh, I wouldn't want to stay there anyway.

So-- - We're very luxury.

- Yeah. Calm down.

- ♪ What you got now, show me what you got now ♪

[phone line trilling]

- Hello? - Ron.

- Hey, what's going on, Ang? - What are you doing?

- Nothing. just doing stuff around the house.

What are you up to?

- Chris called me. He was like, "I'm gonna come home,

'cause we need to talk."

- Oh, man.

I had workouts that lasted longer than this marriage.

How 'bout you? Do you want to work it out with him, or--

- I want to see how things go.

Like, I want to see what he wants to say.

I want to see if we can go to therapy and stuff.

Like, I mean, we never went to therapy before.

Maybe we could actually do it this time.

- Therapy's great. You guys love each other.

You just gotta learn how to express it.

- Yeah, exactly.

- You know, and it'll kind of squash a lot of the rumors

that are going around as well, you know?

- What rumors exactly?

- About that Old Bridge and chicken fingers,

and all that other stuff, you know?

- Listen, at this point, I don't know

who made this rumor up,

and it's, like, total [bleep].

There's no videos of me banging anyone,

and there's no videos of me kissing anyone.

So mind your own [bleep] business.

- Face it head-on, together, you know?

If you love him, that's what you should do.

- Ron, why does it sound like you're getting

a [bleep] right now? [laughs]

- What happened? No, I'm not.

I'm just-- [grunts]

- Oh, Ron.

- This one looks like the most family-friendly.

Oh, they are currently open. Indoor pools.

both: Splash zone. Water slide. Hot tub!

- Oh, my God, CJ's gonna run this place.

I feel like the roomies are gonna love the Poconos resort,

and there's just so much for everybody to do.

I think it'll be a good time.

All right, so I think this is it.

I'm just gonna book it.

I feel like this is gonna be a big celebration.

[phone line trilling]

- Hello? - Hey.

- What's happening?

- So, I booked the resort for our family vacation.

- Ooh, where are we going?

- We are going to the Poconos.

- Oh, my God.

Mike and I, our first trip together,

when we were in college, we went to the Poconos.

This is, like, mind-blowingly insane right now,

because years ago, like, my husband and I,

on our very first trip ever,

came to the Poconos with my family.

And now we're coming full circle.

We haven't been back since.

- So, it was meant to be, then, that I found this place.

- Yes. - All right. Let me call Vinny.

- Ow. [phone rings]

- Oh, wow. Hello, sir.

- Don't sound excited.

- Okay, Vinny Jumps.

So, I just wanted to call you

and let you know I booked our trip,

and we are going to the Poconos.

And if you want to bring your jump rope,

you can bring your jump rope, creep.

- Ay!

♪ ♪

[phone ringing]

- Hey, what's up, Deena?

- Hello. What are you doing? - What's funny is

I'm trying to get some tan from the real sun.

This takes so much longer than the fake and bake inside.

[both laugh] - So, I just wanted

to call you and let you know

I booked our trip to the Poconos.

- Poke-a-who?

Deena, I'm in a relationship. I'm not poking anybody.

- Well, Nikki--I want

Nikki to come. - Oh.

- I want it to be, like, everyone--like, everyone.

- Want me to give up this sunny weather for the snow

is what you're saying.

- Yep. - All right.

- Hello? - Hey.

- Hi. - I just booked us

a family vacation to the Poconos.

- Really? - Yes.

- So-- - Poconos?

- Yes. - Ooh.

- I'm, like, gonna rent out the whole place...

- Ooh.

- So we don't have to fight over a bed this time. Angelina!

- You're stressing the pregnant woman.

- You have to sit on my [bleep] bed, I get it.

- You're stressing out. - Shut up.

You got the god damn bed. She's turning red.

- This is gonna be fun. - It will be fun.

- I'm trying to figure out, though, on my end,

if I should invite Chris or not.

- Is he back is the house? - No.

But he's, like, trying--he's, like, saying he wants to.

- You know, it just seems like Angelina

and Chris' relationship status

goes just, like, on and off every day.

They just have, like, a really dysfunctional relationship.

- I'll think about this, and then I'll let you know.

But I'll definitely come, obviously.

- All right. Yeah, it'll be fun.

I just hope, you know--I don't know

what's gonna happen now.

This should be interesting. If Chris comes--

- Yeah, how are you supposed to have him around,

everyone knowing that these videos are out there?

♪ ♪

- Hello? - Hello.

- Chris? - Yeah, what up?

- Hi.

- I should be there in a little bit.

I'm almost there.

- All right. - I'm on the way.

- Okay.

- See you in a little bit. - Bye.

Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God.

[exhales] All right, this could be good.

Or this could be bad.

Don't bite him, 'cause I know you haven't

seen him in a while.

♪ ♪

Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

- Hello?

- Oh, Mother Mary Joseph, mother[bleep].

You have a full-grown beard?

- Cheers to you not being a [bleep] dramatic b*tch.

- Cheers to you going to [bleep] yourself.

- Cheers to this guy in Old Bridge and Angelina.

- What?

- You just ruined everything.

- This could be the beginning of the storm.

- Poconos are ruined.

- Now, Angelina's gonna come in hot,

thinking that we're gonna attack.

- Oh, [bleep].

♪ ♪

- All right, do I look bad?

I look decent.

Oh boy. it's been a month since Chris moved out.

So, I have a knot in my stomach a little bit,

and kind of, like, just,

wow, like, it's happening, like, he's coming home.

- Hello?

- Oh, Mother Mary Joseph, mother[bleep].

- What? Peanut!

- You have a full-grown beard?

- Yeah.

- How are you jacked as [bleep]?

- I'm not jacked.

- You got jacked.

- It's called pushups.

- Damn, he looks pretty good.

Like, he's got a beard.

Like, that's hot. I don't know,

I think that's hot.

And he's got muscles now.

Wow, a breakup really does a body good, huh?

- Yeah, it does. - Wait, wait, wait, wait,

does this mean that you're staying, with the suitcase?

- Well, I have a couple things.

- A couple things in that big thing?

- Yeah. - What the [bleep]?

I'm very surprised to see Chris with a suitcase,

because we didn't really discuss him moving back in,

but he's got a full-blown suitcase up in this b*tch.

So, why do you have a suitcase?

- I have a couple of items there.

- A couple of items in that big-a*s suitcase over there?

- Yes. - We'll see how it works.

But I took all the drawers in our bedroom, for me.

- [exhales]

[tense music]

- So.

How's your mom? - Good. Yours?

- How's your brother?

- Good.

- How's your friends? - Good.

- You've been out with them a lot.

- I have.

- I mean, you were out every night.

- I wasn't out every night. - Oh, yes you were.

Oh, get the [bleep] out of here, Chris,

you were out every night. - I wasn't out every night.

- You were posting on Instagram every [bleep] night.

- Why you looking at my Instagram?

Thought I blocked you.

- I have a fake page.

I was stalking you.

- What, I'm not allowed to go out?

You were out too.

- Yeah. I was home more than you think.

With Peanut.

- Oh, please. - Right, P?

♪ ♪

- Hey, girl. - Hey.

So, I just wanted to call, because I booked the trip.

So, we are all...

- Oh, you did? - Ready to go.

Yes. And I actually spoke to Angelina.

- Really?

- She's definitely coming.

And she--she said that her and Chris are talking,

so, you know, it's a day-by-day thing,

but there's a possibility that he is gonna come.

- Ooh. Well, hopefully there's no drama.

- So, my question is, though,

we have these freaking stupid videos from this woman.

♪ ♪

- These videos kind of fell in our lap.

And we should actually all come together

and try to figure out a way

we're going to approach Angelina about these videos.

- Yeah. But she has no idea

that you guys have seen this video.

- I don't think so. If the videos get out there

to the social media world, that will be a disaster

for both Chris and Angelina.

We have to get together and fix the situation.

But welcome to my life. - I know.

- There's always some kind of drama.

But listen, this is your drama too.

You're Italian by association.

- By penetration. - And penetration .

[both laugh]

- You're dirty. - I'm dirty.

- See? At least you admit it. I knew it.

- I really think we should bring them to Angelina,

but during the trip,

because I don't want her to spiral

and not come to the trip, and then we're all on vacation

and we have no idea what's happening with her.

We have to navigate, in the most cautious way.

If Chris is there, how are we gonna show her without, like--

- And then, again, like, I don't want to hold on

to these videos for too long,

'cause then it's, like--we don't know

what this girl is gonna do with them.

- Where's your wedding ring? - Where's yours? Okay.

- It's been very lonely here. - I've been lonely too.

- I didn't like being abandoned, honestly.

Even if you were mad, even if I was mad, you know,

running away from problems

is just not the way to do it, I feel.

My father, as a kid,

abandoned me and my two sisters and my mother.

So, for my husband to know all these things and abandoning me

the way he did was just totally sad and wrong.

I want to actually have been able to say, like,

we tried to work on our marriage, at least.

- Yeah, of course.

- Like, I don't want to just throw in the towel.

- Yeah, well, I think

we should go to therapy. And I think that...

- Now you want to go to therapy.

- We need to communicate better.

- You actually believe--like, you're actually not

just saying that? Like, you're serious?

- No, I'm serious. - Chris and I were fighting

so much, and we would say a lot of nasty things to each other.

That's the problem in our relationship,

and that's something that we need to fix.

- You know, when we were apart,

it didn't feel the same.

Felt like emptiness without you.

- Yeah, I felt the same way.

But I don't want to go back to what we--how it was.

- No. - I can't do that again.

- I know this. We gotta take baby steps, I think.

- I'm letting Chris back in because,

no matter what issues a couple has,

you have to try to work at your relationship.

If I just throw in the towel now,

it makes me a failure, I feel, and it makes him a failure.

So, what's gonna be the sleeping arrangements.

- You're gonna sleep on the couch,

and I'm gonna sleep on the bed.

- Well, actually, I have been sleeping on the couch,

if you must know,

because you took the [bleep] TV from our bedroom.

- It was my TV. - It doesn't matter...

- All right. I'll-- - What it was.

- Well, I'll bring it back.

- Yeah, well you should have brought it back right now.

- Well, I didn't plan that.

- Because it wasn't really nice that I had to come home,

and there was no TV up there.

- You do know that there's other TVs in this world.

- There's one other TV here, Chris.

- I'm saying there's stores that sell TVs.

Are you aware of this? - I have a bad back. I can't--

- Best Buy, Walmart. - I understand, but--

- I mean, the list goes on and on.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

- CJ, we're gonna pack for vacation.

You want to help Mommy?

Can you say "vacation"?

Very cool.

- I need my hats, scarves Is it "scarves" or "scarfs"?

I was born for winter vacation.

I got gray sweatpants on top of gray sweatpants.

I got light gray, I got charcoal gray.

'Cause if you only wear gray,

no one can tell the difference if you wore it already.

My clothing choice is just like a reflection of my mood--just,

like, gray, black, beige, repeat.

Maybe a little navy blue or forest green,

if I'm feeling crazy.

Yeah, I think Pauly would like this.

He loves when I wear gray.

- Poconos, oh yeah! - Yay!

- ♪ Take a deep breath side by side ♪

♪ I know we can make it 'cause we're killin' it ♪

- And we're off, honeys.

How long do these appointments usually? Half-hour?

- Yeah, probably like a half-hour.

It's a quick one today. - All right.

- I wish you could come in with me

and see the ultrasound... - Uh-huh.

- And, like, hear the heartbeat.

- I know, I know, honey.

Corona's just still rampant in the streets.

It's such an awesome journey, the journey of pregnancy.

It really is. My wife has this awesome glow about her.

We're such a couple that's, like,

really in the present moment,

and we're so very grateful at all times.

- Oh, he's kicking. - Oh, stop it, he's kicking?

- Yeah.

- He wants to speak with his daddy, probably.

That's probably that it is.

- You gonna keep yourself occupied in the car

while I'm in there?

- I have a couple ideas.

- Okay. Well, maybe we'll get, like, lunch afterwards.

- Yeah. I'm actually starting to get hungries myself.

Okay, here we are, honey.

- I gotta put my mask on.

- All right, text me if you need me.

- All right, wish me luck. both: Love you.

♪ ♪

- I'm getting a little hungries right now.

When the cat is away, the mice will play,

and here we are, the Burger King app.

I'm getting the Whopper meal. Yes. Ooh, customizable.

Yes, I'll take more cheese and more bacon. Deliver here.

Yep. Boom. It's happening.

What she doesn't see may not hurt her.

Let the fist-pumping begin.

- ♪ It's a vibe, it's a mood ♪

♪ And I'm feeling good, how 'bout you? ♪

♪ Yeah, I walk like I talk ♪

♪ Want a taste of my sauce? ♪

♪ You can't mess with my shine, so boss ♪

- Today, I'm on my way to Lucco's,

my favorite restaurant in my town,

because I really want to sit down with Angelina.

I saw her at Mike's sobriety party but, like,

we didn't have a conversation about the wedding.

- That was so [bleep] up.

- I'm quitting, I think.

- Quit? - I think this is it.

- Yeah? - This is not fun.

So, I just want to clear the air and be like,

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to ruin your wedding."

This--this feels dramatic.

So, let's just move on.

Ooh!

Thank you so much. - Of course.

- Oh, [bleep]. It's happening.

[tense music]

- Thank you. Oh, God.

Considering that Nicole went on her podcast

and said that she'd rather chop off a limb

than ever talk to me again or see me again--

- Can we confirm Nicole is returning

to the show to confront Angelina?

- I'd literally rather lose a limb. Please leave me alone.

- Yeah, I kind of am a little, like, shocked that Nicole

actually invited me to this brunch today.

Oh, hey, girl.

- Hey. Thanks for coming. - Thanks for meeting me.

Look, you already got a martini.

You're starting without me.

- I did. Thanks for coming. - I know.

It's been a minute. You took a longer break

than I expected, and I was very upset.

- I needed it. Here's my thing. - Go, go, go.

- I want you to know that I didn't maliciously mean

to hurt your feelings or ruin your wedding.

I'm not that kind of person.

I would never try and do that to somebody.

So, when we--when we knew we were gonna do a speech,

we sat down, we were at the bar,

we were drinking.

And we were like, "Let's just make it funny."

She doesn't take herself seriously,

which I love about her.

- Yeah. - You are the fly

to my [bleep]. You are the dump to my island.

- Yes. She's gonna crack up.

So, that's where I was coming from,

with calling you--with my speech, and what I said.

I thought it was gonna be funny.

You're the fly to our [bleep].

You are the dump to our island. all: Boo!

- Oh, my God. - And I felt bad.

And I just felt like it went overboard and way too crazy,

and I never meant to hurt your feelings.

It was literally--we were trying to be funny,

and we were drunk, and it was stupid.

- And it just didn't land right.

- And it just snowballed. Yeah.

- Yeah. - Yeah. And I regret it,

and it was terrible. And, you know,

we probably should have said it at your bachelorette party.

- Facts. - You would have loved it.

I know you would have loved the speech...

- I know. - If it wasn't at your actual

fairy tale wedding.

- Yeah. The joke just landed wrong,

and I should have reacted the next day, but I didn't.

Finally, the day has come where we could sit there,

break bread, and, like, just be done with all this.

'Cause it's been so long, and I'm just over it.

I don't want this drama anymore.

- And I'm sorry that happened.

- And I'm sorry I did what I did too.

- I'd rather cut my left tit off

than ever talk about this again.

- Please.

♪ ♪

- Where is this delivery guy at?

Listen, out of nowhere, man, it's cheat day, baby.

Treat thyself.

Excuse me! Sir.

BDS needs to eat.

Thank you, sir. Love you so much.

- Yeah. Have a good one, man. - Have a good one, brother.

- Thank you. - It's happening!

Whoo! We're in a time crunch.

BDS is a good connoisseur, okay,

and when I'm on the road, I take my foods very seriously,

so I have a foldable table inside of my car,

so I can eat in style, baby.

Chill dine with my fine china right now.

This is what happens when preparation meets luck.

BDS having it his way, kid. All right, it's going down.

I gotta handle this very quickly,

or I'm gonna get caught.

- ♪ k*ller, venom perfected ♪

♪ Better believe that I bite ♪

♪ They say I was born for the fight ♪

- ♪ My body incredibly tight ♪ - Yes!

- ♪ I got you locked into my sights ♪

- ♪ Ha, game over ♪

♪ Call it overexposure ♪

♪ My light made you lose your composure ♪

♪ Got venom, like I told ya ♪

♪ Red hot sting, I'm your poison ♪

♪ No cure, no avoiding ♪

- The evidence is about to be gone.

♪ ♪

It was so worth it.

[phone ringing] Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Honey, what's happening?

- Are you here? Because I'm about to come out.

I'm done. - I'm here.

- All right, I'll be right out.

- All right, I'll see yo in a second. I love you, bye.

Oh, my goodness, it's happening.

Oh, my goodness. Ahh!

It is very important to get rid of all the evidence,

because this is a covert operations.

♪ ♪

Hey, honey. You look great, honeys.

- What's happening? - Nothing, honey.

I was just cleaning out the car when you was not here,

because I had some time on my hands.

- Cleaning out the car? It kind of smells like Burger King.

- What?

- Cheers to being friends again.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

- How's your family doing? Like, how's the babies?

How's everybody?

- Everybody's really good. How are you and Chris?

- So, we had, like, a little up and down.

Like, we're--you know, we had some rocky stuff going on.

But he's back in the house now.

So now, we're gonna try the therapy out,

see how that works. - Mm-hmm.

- I remember that.

Angelina hasn't gotten pounded out in a long time again.

all: Angelina hasn't gotten plowed out in a long time.

- Why don't you sleep with Chris?

- Every time--every--because we got into fights,

and it'd turn me off,

and then he turn-- got turned off,

and then I got turned off, and then he got turned off,

and then I got turned off, and then he got turned off.

- Just have a glass of wine and make out.

- I did that the other night, actually.

- You did? - Yeah.

- With him? - Yeah. Mm-hmm.

- What'd he do? - We didn't have sex.

- You just stopped? That's so weird.

I never just make out with my husband and stop.

- When you look at your husband, do you say,

"Oh, my God, I want to [bleep] him"?

- Mm-hmm.

- Every time? - Mm-hmm.

- Hmm. - I'm like an escort.

I would love for Chris

and Angelina to work things out,

'cause I feel like they're both soulmates.

But the fact that she's not having sex with her man,

'cause she doesn't want to, that's scary.

'Cause I always want to bang Jionni.

He whips it out, I'm like, "Yeah. I'll take it."

Even if we're mad at each other.

- Cheers again.

- Cheers to, please, never fighting again.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

- No more. No more, ever again.

- Cheers to never fighting again

and just having a good time.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

- Yes. - Thanks.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

Drinking buddies back.

- Cheers again.

- Cheers to you not being a [bleep] dramatic b*tch.

- Cheers to you going to [bleep] yourself.

Cheers again to life, happiness...

- And pursuit.

Cheers to you not starting dramers.

- Oh, [bleep] chill. Cheers--

- Can I do a speech? - Go ahead. Go.

- Angelina, you are the olives to my martini.

- I love that. Cheers. Yes, I love martinis.

- We're on, like, our seventh cheers, and I'm drunk.

Cheers to this guy in Old Bridge and Angelina.

- What? No.

What the [bleep]? You're kidding with me right now.

- There's evidence. - Oh, God.

- ♪ Come and get me ♪

♪ Like a ball of wire ♪

- Cheers to this guy in Old Bridge and Angelina.

- There's no guy from Old Bridge.

- Girl. - And there it is.

I knew that it could [bleep] not be as perfect

as I thought it was gonna be.

Here we go.

- The streets are talking. - Oh, God.

The streets. Come on.

- No, I'm not kidding. There's evidence.

So, word on the streets is that Angelina is hanging out

with this guy in Old Bridge.

But do you have a boyfriend?

[tense music] - [sighs]

- A [bleep] full-on boyfriend? - Yeah.

- You mean a guy friend. A friend.

- That you sleep at his house? - No.

A friend that I hang out with.

- There's timestamps. - Multiple friends.

- There's timestamps-timestamps when you leave his house.

- Unless you have a video of me [bleep] somebody

or kissing somebody, it don't--it's not [bleep].

I'm trying to take the high road here.

But if there is videos of me, those videos are nothing.

- So, the speech was for nothing. All that drama.

- Oh, stop it. I'm not doing anything.

Listen, I don't throw in the towel in marriage.

I got married for a reason,

and I'm gonna take it seriously.

You know, I'm glad that we are having this brunch right now,

because we definitely needed it.

We needed to clear the air and get on with everything,

get on with our lives already.

- Okay, let's go. - But I don't need people

prying and getting involved and trying to figure out [bleep],

trying to [inaudible] things on me.

Thank you. Like, I don't know if I want to go

with the roommates on the trip

if everyone's gonna be so, like, involved in my marriage.

- Talk soon, for another boozy brunch.

- A drunken day. - I literally have to

call Deena right now and tell her what happened at brunch.

Because I sat down with Angeliners, we drank,

and we didn't fight each other.

Where are you right now? 'Cause I want to see you.

- Text me where you are, and I'll meet you.

- ♪ Time to tell, you ain't gotta ask ♪

[knock at door] - Neighbor?

- Yeah. - Hi, neighbor.

- Hey, what's up? - Did you see this video?

- What is it?

- I don't even know why I'm smiling,

because I think it might have screwed up all of Poconos.

- No. - Yes.

- Stop. - Yeah, Nicole [bleep] up.

Just straight up, she [bleep] everything up.

- You're shy! - They were out

to lunch together. - They seem a little drunk.

- Cheers to this guy in Old Bridge and Angelina.

- Oh, my God. No. That's-- - [laughs]

She just ruined everything.

- Yo. Yo, that's gonna ruin everything.

- I am dying right now, for the fact that Nicole

is taking what we wanted to handle with kitten gloves

and making a joke out of it, and cheersing to him.

And I have a really big feeling that this is actually

going to cause a major problem with the Poconos.

- I agree. This could be the beginning of the storm.

- Poconos is ruined.

[intense music]

♪ ♪

- Party's here!

Hey, move it a little.

Can you move up a little, sir? Sorry, I'm drunk.

- Oh, my God, I can't. - Do you miss me?

- Yeah, I miss you. - I miss you. How do you feel?

- I feel good. I'm--I'm ready to pop.

- Yeah. - Just trying to get ready

for the trip. - Yeah.

- Why don't you come on the trip with us?

- I can't swing it. - Okay.

- So, I just sat down with Angeliners.

- Yeah. So, how did that go.

- Honestly, it was pretty good.

We just talked about the wedding.

Obviously got that out of the way,

because I don't want to talk about that ever

again in my life. - Yeah, same.

- I feel like we're all over it.

And I asked her about Chris, and she was like,

"I'm just trying to have a good time.

I don't know why people are trying to, like,

ruin my relationship."

I was like, "Well, the streets are talking." I said that.

- Oh, my God. - She's nervous.

- I'm nervous. - She's like, "I don't know

why everyone's talking about my marriage."

- Oh, my God.

Snooki is back dropping full-on chaos.

All of our hard work. The boards.

We've been planning this, strategizing, for weeks.

This is blowing up our whole plan right now,

because Angeliners didn't know

that we actually had the videos.

And now that she thinks that we have the videos,

she may not even show up to the trip.

And she may, even worse, think that we're out to get her,

when in fact we're there to help her

to get ahead of these videos and go full disclosures.

- And now Angelina's not responding....

- Yeah. - To my texts or anything.

- So, we don't know if she's coming with Chris or not.

- I'm assuming single. - Yeah.

- Or, "Hey, guys, this is my new boyfriend."

- Yeah. Oh, God. Three--threesome!

♪ ♪

- You wanna wheel me a suitcase so I'm down here?

- Did you tell Moses we're doing this today?

- I did. That's why he's sulking.

- This man is--he doesn't like

when we bring out the suitcases.

- When we go on our trip, you want your Harry Potter bag,

or you want your little bag?

- Yeah. - Harry Potter?

- Big boy bag.

- ♪ I got a feeling this town I'm ready to fly ♪

♪ You look like a boy who could show me the sights ♪

♪ You got a first class ticket and a look in your eye ♪

♪ Take me away ♪

- Are you ready for this trip to the Poconos?

- I think so. [laughter]

- I'm thinking that Deena maybe forgot who her roommates are.

We went to Miami, we went to Italy, we went to the Shore.

Now she wants us to go to the Poconos?

In the winter?

- It's degrees. - ?

- There's a % chance of snow.

- For the family, we do it. We're going on a trip.

Poconos, yeah!

♪ ♪

- This is the Poconos family vacation.

- I can't believe we're back here.

I'm so excited. Like, I love the snow.

♪ ♪

- Okay.

This is what happens when you let Deena plan the trip.

Is this where you k*ll me?

I think the driver's gonna kidnap me, k*ll me,

and bury me in the woods, because I'm looking around,

and I'm like, I do not see civilization.

And I'm in trouble.

Cool. No answer. That's great.

♪ ♪

- What are you doing? Dishes? - Putting some dishes away.

- Wow! Is it my birthday? - Nope.

- So, what's up? You packed or what?

- I don't think I'm gonna go. - Really?

- Feel like, I don't know--I don't trust

what the hell they're trying to pull over here.

And, like, they're all, like, too much in my business,

and, like, I don't get it.

- I mean, it's your call. - Do you want to go?

- Well, listen, if we go there, then we tell them

that we're working on things between ourselves,

and it's none of their business.

- If Chris comes with me on this vacation,

what the [bleep] are the roommates gonna do?

Are they gonna bring up this [bleep] about my relationship?

They gonna bring up these, like, videos

and chicken tenders and bull[bleep] that they think

they have on me?

Who the hell knows what

they're gonna try to plop on me

or what they're gonna try to say.

- Plop? What's that? - Plop? I don't know.

- The [bleep] is plop?

- years later,

and The Situations are back.

- Poconos babymoon! - Yes.

both: I'm so excited.

- For me, this is super nostalgic,

because it's been years

since we've been at this Poconos resort.

But I feel very sentimental to be back here with my husband.

- Oh, my God, Deena's calling, honey. Deener.

- Hi. What are you guys doing?

- We're just getting to the mountains right now,

the Poconos resort. What's happening?

- Nothing. So, Chris just called me.

It looks like he's gonna be working late.

So I don't think I'm gonna get up there tonight.

- All right, so you gonna be here tomorrow?

- So, yeah. Have a good time,

and we will see you tomorrow morning.

- Good. Thank you so much. - All right, Deena.

We'll see you soon.

- All right. - We'll see you tomorrow.

Hold on. Wait for big daddy to come on over.

Wait for big daddy to come on over.

I degree think the roommates will like this vacation.

But it's sort of like a guido out of water.

Ooh, honey! - It smells like a lodge.

- Because we've never really been on a cold vacation before.

- You're staying over in the Mountain Laurel building.

- Okay. - And what's great,

you're across the way from a lot of our resort amenities.

- Oh, wow. - There's some go cart tracks

up there, and then it also has some

indoor bumper cars as well.

It's got a skating rink.

And of course, you have to get snow tubing.

Got our basketball gym as well.

Might want to do some mini-bowling

and play some arcade games, too.

Got some campfires, too,

little shuffleboard, bocce ball.

- Bocce ball? - Yeah.

both: Oh, my God!

- Do you know that I made it to the prison championships twice?

- That is fantastic. - Yes.

♪ ♪

- Why is it called the Poconos? - I think it's because

you poke your nose in everyone's business,

'cause that's what we're about to do, poke our nose

in Angelina's business, that's why we went here.

- Can you pull over? I'm just gonna be sitting back,

like, "Can I get a hot chocolate?"

- ♪ Ahh ♪

- Oh, my God, it's cold out here.

♪ ♪

It's a very windy day to be doing boards.

These FBI boards are very delicate, and I have

to slowly but surely, and strategically,

bring these inside without anyone seeing a thing.

- What the hell is this? - I got the boards, honey.

- What?

I'm so over these boards.

Let's just put it on display over here...

- Just put it in an area. - In case we have to have it--

- Because it was really windy out there, honey.

- But you know what, I'm actually happy the boards

made it here, because I'm hoping

they stay here and they rest in peace in the Poconos.

- Oh, my goodness. - Hello, hello.

- Oh, my goodness. Look who it is.

- How are you? - What up, my dude?

Come here. Give me a hug, brother.

- How are you? [bleep] miss you, kid.

- That's nice. What is that, velvet?

- How are you? - Hey, how are you?

- What's up, buddy? - All right, come on.

Let's show him-- let's show him his room.

- Come in. Come in. - This is your room right here.

- Oh, my God, look at this room. Look at this.

- You have a lot of space back here.

- Yeah. So, is you--are you bringing the woman? Or--

- Yeah, she's coming. - Whoo!

- Yay! - Yes. Yes.

- She's excited to meet all of you.

- Nice. - I am really excited.

Sapphire finally gets to meet the family.

But I'm also nervous, because she knows how important

the roommates are to me,

and I want them to see that, you know,

she's a great person, and this is the person

that I have in my life.

- Also, Ang may not be coming. - Really?

- Yeah. You know, we were gonna talk to her when we got here,

because there was someone that had, like, videos of her,

said she was being scandalous in the streets.

- Last time I checked,

Angelina's telling me there's nothing going on.

You know, she has her story.

And I'm like, "Ang, whatever your story is,

just make sure that you can back it up."

- And eventually, we got ahold of the video.

It's definitely a very difficult situation right now,

because we're trying to keep this all in the family.

This video, or this story, could break any moment.

Angelina, she needs to know this.

She needs to have the videos.

She needs to see the videos. It's just not a good situation.

That's supposed side boo.

- Ah!

- This is out in the open.

♪ ♪

[child laughing]

- Guys, please be quiet while I'm driving. I can't see.

- Roads are probably icy, baby. We are in nowhere.

- Kansas?

- Do you not know that reference?

- No. - "Wizard of Oz"?

- Oh, okay. Well, there you go.

I know--I've seen that.

- Yo, what's up, my brother?

I'm in the Poconos. Where is this place at?

- It's next to the tree, by the bigger tree,

past the big pile of snow.

- Oh. It's by the snow. - Yo, what up, my dude?

- Yo, what's good?

What room number are you guys in?

- , brother. We're in your room.

- All right, I'll meet you in there. Bye.

- Whoa, Nellie.

It's a cold one. This ain't Vegas.

- Ahh!

You feel that breeze?

- So cold. - Yo! What up?

- There they are. Hey! - What up? What up?

- What's up? What's up? - Hi.

- What up? What up? What up? [all greeting]

- I tested negative for COVID.

- Positive for other things.

- Whoo. - So, who's coming?

- Uhh, exactly.

- I know Vinny's coming. Talked to him.

- JWOWW and Zack.

- Deener's coming tomorrow. both: Yes.

- Deener's coming tomorrow.

- And then the only one-- the wild card's Angelina,

'cause in just don't know if she's bringing Chris.

- Angelina said she wasn't coming,

and that was, like-- - Last minute.

- Aww, damn. That's crazy. Why would she not come?

- Side piece!

- I knew I smelled Staten Island.

- God, I've missed you!

- What's up? What's up, Moschino?

- Hi, Vinny. - Hey, sidepiece.

- Oh Vinny, your beard grew in. - Shut up.

[laughter]

Oh, [bleep]. What's up?

- Well, we were just getting into thick of it.

- Already? - Yeah, we were. We were.

- Oh God, it's been rough. - We would love your input.

- What are you guys talking about?

both: Angelina. - Videos.

- One thing, guys-- in those videos,

you can't really see the guy's face, right?

- It's me. [laughter]

- Wait, so how do you think we should address it?

'Cause we've been walking about this for way too long.

- Seriously, though. - Don't look at me, bro.

- To be honest with you, with Angelina,

she just throws it all up anyway.

So, she comes in, and she'll say everything.

- She'll say it herself. - Yeah.

- She'll probably-- "I just want to get it

started off by saying that"-- - She'll probably walk

in and be like, "All right, what the [bleep] is up?"

- Yeah. - Like, get it out.

- "All right, let me see these videos."

- We should have, like, a courtroom, right?

And we'll debate it.

- Yeah. - Exhibit A.

- Yo, you guys meet The Investigation?

- I have not.

- This guy has been cooped up in his basement...

- Yeah. - With FBI boards,

tracking this whole situation down.

- Yeah. - I wish you [bleep] had them.

- Oh, you didn't bring it? - Actually, I did.

- No. - What? You brought the board?

- You brought the board? - I did.

This right here, it's a lot of hard work, guys. Okay?

The Investigation has started right here,

- Oh, [bleep]. - Oh, my God.

- [bleep], this guy went to work.

- I feel like I'm on, like, an episode of "CSI."

- What the heck?

- The butt lift section's on there,

like that has anything to do with it.

- It all--bro, it's all connected.

At one time, the IRS had a board like this about Mike.

- Facts. Facts. [laughter]

So, we had the wedding, also known as the Titanic.

- Mm-hmm. - Where the speech happened.

Right around that time right, Vincent,

she got a butt lift, right?

- Mm-hmm. - Okay.

- We thought it was innocent. - Yeah.

- But. - Butt.

- We went into the redo, all right?

- Epic redo, by the way.

- She had her first year anniversary.

- It was all looking good. - It was all good.

And then it all started to down downhill.

- "When you're a liar, be prepared to be exposed.

The wait till be over soon enough"?

- Wow. - Ooh!

- Cryptic. Cryptic. - Wow. Yeah.

- Where do the videos fit in over here?

- That's a good question.

The videos are from October to now, right around--

- October was before the wedding.

- Right around here. I'm trying to pin together

where all this madness is happening.

And then out of nowhere, around this time, the videos pop in.

- Yikes. - You outdid yourself.

- They really are detailed.

- The Investigation, ladies and gentlemen.

- Thank you. Thank you.

- Let's give it up for The Investigation.

- How did it get to this from the wedding,

to a speech, to a redo?

- Yo. - How the hell?

- Yo, this girl got patterns, kid.

- How the hell?

- Oh, honey, did you tell everyone that years ago,

me and the wifey were here on our first vacation ever?

- It's true. - When we were in college.

- Grew so much, from community college to community service.

[laughter]

- Was that some sort of besmudgery, my boo?

- "My boo"? [laughter]

"My boo."

[laughter]

- All right, let's go to dinner.

- Let's go to dinner.

- No, Deener's coming tomorrow. - I'm hungry.

- I got my main b*tch and my side b*tch

on my Pocono vacation.

And I got the Sorrentinos on the Pocono vacation.

- Love your sweater. - Pauly got just a hoodie on.

You know dinner's outside, right?

[laughter]

- Thank you. - All right, thank you, sir.

- After you guys. - Thanks, my boo.

- Couples on one side? - I'm sitting next to Pauly.

- Sit on the floor. - Oh, damn. [laughs]

- Nice and warm in here. - This is a nice Pocono resort.

- Yeah, it's nice. Nice and toasty.

- Surf and turf in the building.

- They got filet mig-nane.

- First dinner back with the crew in a while.

I love when we all catch up,

when we go on these vacations, go on these big dinners.

- They have lava cake. I used to DJ at Lava.

They have chocolate peanut butter pie.

Who made this menu?

- He hasn't been out in a while.

- I hope that Jenni answer Zack show up.

If I had to estimate, she's close to being here.

- Right now, I don't know where Jenni is.

But you never know with Jenni.

She has a lot of responsibilities.

She has three kids--

Greyson, Meilani, -- So she's busy.

- You tooted, Greyson. - Oh, come on.

No farting in the car.

- I'm sorry, Mommy.

- I know she said she's not coming,

but there's definitely a possibility

that Hurricane Angeliners is coming to shore soon.

♪ ♪

- This is relaxation time for Angelina.

So, I've decided that I'm gonna go to the Poconos.

I just want to have fun and hang out.

- Yeah, just want to have fun.

- I don't want any problems between my husband and I.

Chris and I might have huge issues with one another.

But that doesn't mean that I'm not his pit bull on the side.

No dramers in this life.

- At least for the first night. - Oh, hell no.

- Is the water rumbling? - The water is rumbling.

- Ooh, that means she's coming.

- Hurricane Angeliners arrives with no notice, you know?

She's just gonna arrive ashore, and just [bleep] up.

- You know what, we could have squashed this

if it wasn't for that lunch with Nicole.

We actually could have worked it out.

- Yeah. Now, it's-- - We didn't have

bad intentions. Even though we still

have these videos, we don't have bad intentions.

- No. I mean, it is a bit-- - But now, she's thinks that--

- It is a bit funny, but--yeah.

- That everyone's gonna attack her with it.

- Going into this vacation, we have to feel Angelina out.

As much as we want to get ahead of it,

we can't have Angelina

really spiraling out of control too much.

- She needs to know that

they were gonna be sold to TMZ regardless.

- And we're trying to get ahead of it,

and she can act as she chooses with the information we have.

- I mean, I think Angelina thinks, like,

"Hey, you know, maybe if we don't talk about it,

it doesn't exist." That's not how it works.

When you break your arm, you gotta get it fixed.

You just can't make believe it didn't happen.

- They're here.

- ♪ Yes ♪

- Walking into this [bleep], I'm a little nervous,

because I don't know what they're all gonna say to me,

what they're all gonna say to my husband.

It's like another Lake Las Vegas-type [bleep].

Nobody's here. If anybody comes for me

and my husband on this trip, and steps over

our boundary line--all right, I got the key--

then you're gonna have a problem with me and him.

- We're here. We made it.

- Now, Angelina's gonna come in hot,

thinking that we're gonna attack.

- ♪ Everthing's shut down, yeah ♪

- Today's not the day to [bleep] with me.

I'm in a bad--I'm in a mood.

- We were [bleep] around, and...

- In the parking lot?

- Got engaged. all: Oh!

- She said yes!

- Oh, damn, what up? - Let me see these videos.

- They're, like, that.

- Get the [bleep] out of here with that.

- Happening.

- Stop talking about dumb [bleep], though.

[shouting] all: Oh!

- Oh, my God! - Oh, my God!