03x09 - Holy Drama

[bunniefuu]

- I [...] got to you.

- I'm [...] ten years older than you, bro.

- You can disrespect your man any day of the week,

but we are not gonna disrespect mine,

and that's what I'm gonna [bleep] checkmate you,

real quick.

- Jenni is obliviatedly drunk, and all of a sudden,

I just feel this big hand just, like, right on me.

- I mean, Jenni is jealous over everything.

Like, if she knew what was going on,

she would k*ll both of you.

♪ ♪

- ♪ Here I come ♪

- Yeah, buddy!

♪ ♪

- Party's here!

- The Situation is under construction.

- This might not have been the best idea.

- We're so classy now.

- On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

- Get the frig out of here, are you crazy?

- Um, hello?

- ♪ Here I come ♪

- ♪ So what the business is ♪

♪ Lady, who you came with ♪

♪ I can tell what you drinkin' ♪

♪ By reading your body language ♪

So distinguished, and her walk's the meanest

♪ I mean, mean, and sippin' pure ♪

♪ Dreamless ♪

- What the [bleep] is going on?

There's some weird [bleep] happening

between and Angelina.

He's been buddy-buddy with her,

grabbing up on her in the club.

If JWOWW knew what was going on,

she would not like that.

- I drank way too much tequila. - Oh, I can tell.

I don't think I've ever seen you this drunk.

- I've never been this drunk.

- Well, good thing you have a handler.

It is time for bed. The meatballs are wasted.

Jenni can't open her eyes.

It's past 's bedtime.

I just want to get to sleep without a w*r happening.

- You would get the trophy for being the biggest d*ck.

- Come on, Angelina. I'm tired.

I don't feel like dealing with this.

- I don't know. I just think he's creepy.

If you're in a relationship with somebody,

you don't go out and grab another girl.

I don't care if it was my side.

I don't care if it was my a*s.

It's just-- it was just weird altogether.

- I'm over it. I'm going to bed, I guess.

♪ ♪

- Yeah, me also.

- [hiccups]

[upbeat pop music]

- ♪ No time for racing ♪

♪ She's telling me right now ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Then you can show me how ♪

[alarm beeping]

- No.

Oh, my God.

So waking up this morning,

I am seriously still drunk right now.

Like, every part of me has tequila in it.

I don't know where I am.

I am so confused.

My outfit is still on.

Like, no recollection of how I got back to the hotel,

and we have to go to the airport in an hour.

- [indistinct].

- I think I drank too much.

[indistinct].

I can't right now.

I'm ready to go on the plane and go home.

- I gotta give you a hug. You're a good roommate.

Me and Angelina really bonded this trip,

and I wasn't expecting that, you know,

'cause she's so raunchy and stuff,

but I just really needed to get to know her on my own,

and me and her hit it off.

You know, she's fun. I have a good time with her.

- I'm gonna miss you. - Me too.

♪ ♪

- Ready? - Ready for what?

- To get your a*s up. - [indistinct].

- You still smell like tequila.

- [chuckles]

- If you don't leave Vegas like this,

then you didn't really experience Vegas.

♪ ♪

[groans]

- Bye, Ang. - Bye, best friend.

- Oh, God. - I'll call you.

- Oh, wait a minute. You're gonna call me for what?

To talk to me about-- - About--yeah, we're just--

we can talk now, 'cause we're friends.

- Oh, jeez.

- I think did great with the roomies.

I really wish I remember more.

I don't, so, I'd like to say he did good.

Yep, from what I recall.

- Oh, look, that's where you died last night.

- I don't remember anything. - sh*t.

- I just knew to go home.

- I remember...

- Good morning.

- Hey. - Last night was crazy.

- Yeah.

I heard you fought with last night.

- Yeah, no, it was bad.

- The weirdest thing is, I saw everyone--

I saw you guys dancing at Drai's, and he was--

- You saw it! You saw it! - He grabbed you.

- You saw it. I saw your face.

Thank God. Thank God you--I--

- What the [bleep] was that? - I wasn't dreaming.

- Nah. Jenni was right here, grinding.

You were next to him, and he grabbed you like this

and was touching your a*s and was, like, going like this.

- Oh, his hand was all over that [bleep].

I'm like... [gasps] - That was weird.

- I was like, "Stop."

And she didn't even see it.

She didn't see it because she was--

- No, she was, like, in his legs.

- I don't know, I can't put my finger on the kid, I really--

- That whole situation was weird.

Yeah, I mean, I wouldn't do that.

- I'm actually happy that somebody did see it

other than just myself, thank God.

'Cause at this point, I don't trust

anything about this guy.

In all honesty, like, I felt that he got

too comfortable way too quick with me.

- Yeah. - I don't know what to say.

I just--I feel like it was just, it wasn't normal.

- Even though I don't like Angelina,

like, I actually agree with her right now

that that was kind of a shady situation.

- He said, before he left,

that he's gonna call me to say hi to me.

♪ ♪

- That's odd.

- I think she's moving a little too quick, in my opinion.

- Yeah. Jenni has the blinders on too.

- That's another thing. - 'Cause she's in love.

I know that Jenni is looking through

Zack-colored lenses right now, but if Jenni finds out

about this whole thing, she's gonna flip out.

- Oh, God, Vinny. This is gonna be a problem.

♪ ♪

- ♪ You're talking backwards and upside-down ♪

♪ ♪

- All right, Gigi, let's get ready for the baby.

I'm so excited for a new baby.

Honestly, I love being a mom.

See the baby's mouth?

No, let's be nice to the baby.

You don't really cry when it comes to the third one.

With Lorenzo, I remember, like, how emotional it was.

Sissy, I was like, "Oh," but Angelo, I'm like,

"Look, just get out. Let's go."

- ♪ I'm not any higher now ♪

♪ ♪

♪ You got me, you got me good ♪

♪ ♪

[upbeat pop music]

- ♪ Lights flashing ♪

♪ So turn the music down ♪

♪ ♪

♪ I want to see the ♪

♪ Lights, lights, flashing ♪

- So, last night was my final show in Chippendales.

I'm all done.

But before I leave Vegas and the Cromwell,

I'm stopping at my boyfriend Pauly's house

to hang out with Ronnie and Pauly one more time.

Pauly don't live with his mama no more!

Been waiting so long to do that to him.

[doorbell resounds]

- Yo, what's up, handsome? - What up, dude?

- What's good, man? - What up, dude?

- How are you? - This guy got "guylights" now.

- Got guylights! - Oh!

- And they on point too, so you know...

[laughter]

- The guylights are back.

We got Ricky AKA Ronnie Martin back in the building,

and I'm just like, "Yo, the guylights

are what got you into this mess in the first place."

Remember, before Miami, everything was all peaches.

- You think you can control yourself?

- Yeah, of course I can control myself.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

- Had the guylights...

- ♪ You ain't heard, you ain't heard ♪

♪ I'm the man round here ♪

♪ Money, hoes, and clothes, that's the plan round here ♪

♪ Couple freaks in the club, girl, do yo' thang ♪

♪ Back it up on the young ♪

[door slams shut]

♪ That's why I came ♪

- Guylights started that [bleep].

They get to your head. I'm telling you.

It's that bleach.

- So Vinny's done here, man. His residency's over.

You must want to eat, bro.

- I know, I've been eating air and water since I've been here.

Being a stripper is hard.

I was onstage five shows a week,

so I couldn't really, like,

fall off the diet too much, so it's been tough.

[doorbell resounds]

- Hold on, let me get this.

Now that Vinny's good to eat some real food again,

I got a surprise for him.

Thank you.

- All right. - Oh, my God.

- What the hell?

- This [bleep] ain't keto, my dude.

I got pizza, I got snacks,

I got everything Vinny couldn't eat for months.

We're gonna carb up.

Boom! Carb.

- Wow.

It has been months since I've had a carb.

I am about to [bleep] this pizza right now.

If this pizza had a hole, I would be giving it a baby.

- Let us pray. - [laughs]

- Dear carb gods,

we're sorry for our fake Italian friend here

that doesn't eat carbs anymore.

Today, he will go back to his roots

and eat carbs again.

Amen.

- Amen.

- Father, Son, Holy Ghost, amen.

- [speaking indistinctly] - Wow.

All right. Here we go.

[cymbal shimmering]

♪ ♪

I haven't seen a pizza in so long.

♪ ♪

The smell of the cheese and the flour,

just oozing through my nose.

I am like a crackhead seeing crack for the first time

in five months after being clean.

♪ ♪

- Ooh.

- The sugar, the taste-- it's amazing--

but something's not right.

♪ ♪

It's not time yet.

- What the hell? - I just can't.

- What?

- I needed that little bit

just to be in my mouth,

but I'm a spitter.

- [laughs]

- Don't you do it! Don't you do it!

Not in this house! He's still eating like a bird.

Eat that [bleep] outside.

- Angelina's trying to turn it into something

like he grabbed her.

She [bleep] kissed him.

- Jenni is saying Angelina tried to kiss Zack.

- Don't cry. - I'm stressed out.

I've lost so much weight over all this.

This could ruin my future marriage.

- If the kiss is how he explained it,

she's gonna have to deal with me.

- ♪ Uh ♪ [horn blares]

♪ Yo ♪

♪ All I care about is counting money ♪

[cell phone chiming]

- Hello? - Are you coming?

- Yeah, I'll be there in a little bit.

- I appreciate it. - All right. Good-bye.

How did I get myself into this?

So it's been a little awkward since we got back from Vegas.

What happened was,

we were in a group chat talking about the night

Jenni was drunk in Vegas with .

I made a comment like, "Yeah, and how about when

Zack was dancing with Angelina?"

Angelina says that Zack was grabbing her.

She doesn't like .

She's saying his intentions aren't good,

and that really pissed off Jenni.

- Angelina's trying to turn it into

something like he grabbed her.

- Oh, God.

- Anytime you're on Jenni's bad side,

you're also on Nicole's bad side,

so Nicole starts to text Angelina, like,

as Jenni's little attack Chihuahua...

[dog barks]

And was like, "What are you saying about Zack?"

- She's texting me saying, "What happened in Vegas?

Did you make it a big deal that he was dancing with you?"

- So now it's an all-out w*r.

- She [bleep] kissed him.

- Jenni is now saying that Angelina tried to kiss Zack.

- How [bleep] dare her?

- Angelina's mad that everyone's teaming up on her,

that this is gonna ruin her engagement,

and they're all about to get together

for Deena's baby's baptism

in just a couple days.

It's insane.

♪ ♪

Where do I really even start?

[doorbell chimes] Hi.

- Hi.

Are you going to the baptism?

- Yep.

- Is Ron? - I think everybody but Pauly.

- Angelina? - Mm-hmm.

[laughs]

- I haven't seen her since Vegas.

So what happened that night?

Do tell.

♪ ♪

[phone line trilling]

- Hello? - Hi.

- What's up? - I'm on my way to Deena's,

'cause I don't know what the hell to do at this point.

- Chris, come on.

I wouldn't touch that kid with your [bleep].

Stop.

The lies about me kissing are so upsetting

because this is something that has really been taking a toll

on me and my fiancé and our relationship.

- You know what, [bleep] them all,

because the truth's gonna come out anyway.

- All right. Well, I'm about to pull up.

- All right. - I love you.

[line beeps]

[bleep].

I'm kind of, like, in a bad place right now,

because I don't know who to turn to,

and this could potentially ruin my engagement

and my future marriage if something is not done here.

- Hi. - Hello.

- Thanks for coming by. - How are you?

Hi, Mama!

I feel like me and Deena, after Vegas,

really have a bond now,

and hopefully she could help with this whole situation.

- I don't even know where all of this even came from--

like, him grabbing you

and you kissing him, and I'm like,

"Where the [bleep] is all this happening?"

- The grabbing me thing, it did happen.

- But what did Zack do?

He just moved you out of the way?

- He didn't move me out of the way.

He grabbed me.

I felt it was a little inappropriate to do that,

especially when his girlfriend was incoherent.

She didn't even know her own name,

and then she face-planted into the Drai's floor.

- [groans]

♪ ♪

- I wish I saw all of this. Where the [bleep] was I?

Whoo!

- Drop, drop it like it's hot.

- I don't fricking know.

- Like, I mean, I was there, but I really wasn't.

It was, like, the first time ever I blacked out.

- Yeah, you were blacked out.

- I just don't like being that person that's like,

"I don't remember any of it,"

but I'm glad that I was that level,

because if I would have saw that...

- Saw what? - Her kissing him,

and I was in a state of mind that's like--

- But that's the part where she is,

like, denying ever happened.

- So you were the sober one. - Maybe--

well, I didn't see that part.

- Oh. - I saw a separate part.

- Mm-hmm.

- I saw him dancing with the two of you,

and then he, like, reached around, like, you know,

and probably touched, like, this area right here,

to, like, dance with both of you, which was weird to me.

♪ ♪

- Whatever, that's, like-- to me, that's harmless.

I thought she was actually doing it to just, like,

get under our skin, 'cause we were fighting.

- Mr. , you know me for minutes, brah.

- Oh-h*-h*! - Oh, my God!

- See, now you're just being an a*s, because--

- No, I'm not. - Yeah, you are.

- You're being an a*s to him. - I'm not being an a*s to him.

- That's when I step in.

But it was weird, because, like,

in between, she was fine at the hotel.

And I remember being in the shower,

and Zack's like, she's outside asking for a threesome.

- Are you banging? Is your schlong out?

- What are you doing?

- What are you doing in there?

- Sleeping. - What--leave them alone.

- No, you weren't.

Coming in. Threesome.

- No, you're not. - Okay, enough.

- Were you there for that? - No.

- I don't get it.

Angelina is so worked up about ,

but the girl has no boundaries.

From what I was told,

"We were kissing like this," he said...

- Who is "we"? - Me and Zack.

- Okay.

- And then she came in like this,

and she, like, kissed him right here.

- Oh, [bleep]. - Exactly.

- She might have been-- you know, she gets drunk,

she forgets things too, so she might have been--

- I hate that excuse.

- Of course, Jenni's using the same excuse too.

I can tell she's sticking by her man, rallying behind him,

and she is not gonna take Angelina's side.

- Did you and Jenni talk? - No.

She texted me that crap that I kissed her boyfriend,

and you know I didn't kiss her boyfriend.

I just feel the tension with me, Nicole, and Jenni,

which, to me, I don't understand.

Nicole, you weren't even there!

How do you know that this happened?

So I don't know what to do.

If Jenni doesn't like me, Nicole doesn't like me.

If Jenni likes me, Nicole likes me.

I feel like the odd person out,

and I feel like I need, like, a friend here.

♪ ♪

- I don't really want to get involved, because,

you know, like, I love both of you,

so I just don't want to get pushed in the middle of this.

♪ ♪

- This is, like, upsetting. I'm gonna, like, cry.

- Don't cry. Why are you gonna cry?

♪ ♪

- 'Cause it's sad,

because I'm going through this all the time...

- Don't cry. Don't cry.

- Even my fiancé is like, "Did you do that?"

I'm stressed out.

I lost so much weight over all this.

This can break up my engagement, you know?

Like, just her saying that-- my fiancé thinks

that this actually happened, and this is why I'm upset.

Do you get what I'm saying?

I never did any of this. - Right.

- She's trying to say that I did,

and now I'm gonna have to freaking defend myself

against this girl and her posse over there,

and now I'm gonna be alone,

and then you don't want to get involved,

because you don't want to deal with this drama,

but I just kind of need a friend at this point,

in the house.

- No, I get it. - It's sad.

- I am your friend.

But you need to talk it out. You really do.

- Okay, it's tough, because it's like one narrative

against the other about this, and...

- Yeah. - There is a truth somewhere.

- I don't trust Angelina.

I truly believe that.

He's just not capable of lying.

Like, there's nothing for him to gain out of that.

- I don't know where that girl's head's at, man.

I'm scared to go to your baptism soon.

- No. There's nothing happening at the [bleep] baptism.

I'll k*ll people.

Baptisms are big things in Italian families,

so if anybody starts anything at my son's baptism,

I will never be able to forgive them.

- The true truth will come out, and then it could be addressed.

- Hopefully.

- Look, I want to say that, at a baby baptism,

everyone's gonna be cordial, but there is the possibility,

though, that Jenni will grab Angelina by the hair

and drown her in the holy water.

- If the kiss is truly how he explained it,

then she's gonna have to deal with me.

- ♪ Pull up, 'bout to roll up ♪

- ♪ Uh-huh ♪ - ♪ Stayin' on my grind ♪

- We're all in town for Deena's baptism tomorrow,

so today, I am getting in some bro time with Ronnie.

- Before we walk in, we don't really have,

like, any beef, right?

- Yeah, right. - Like, we're all fine?

- When you have a friend that's coming out of recovery,

you gotta get creative,

'cause you're not gonna go to the bar anymore,

so we're gonna go do a fun activity

that doesn't involve throwing back shots.

We're gonna go throw axes.

- ♪ Gotta get it ♪

- Gonna reach up, pop it right in like that.

It's real easy, right? - Real easy.

- It's real easy. - Just like that.

- Just like that.

- Ooh! Four! - Hey!

- I'm [bleep] standing over here.

- Oh! - Whoo!

- Oh! - Two at a time.

- [laughs]

- All right. All right.

That's bad. Ron, you gotta hit one.

Come on.

- Hey! Hey, I got one!

- Speaking of throwing weapons, how's Jen?

- [laughs]

Speaking of burying the hatchet.

She's good.

- Oh! That was close.

So are you guys together right now?

- Yeah, bro.

- Record screech, like,

"Oh, God. Here we go again."

- After that [bleep] that went down in Vegas,

we broke up for, like, a month or two.

- Oh, really? - Then I--

yeah, and then I finally just got to a point

where I was like, "Bro," like--I was like,

"You want to go see a therapist and, like, get some help?"

I'm like, "'Cause we need to figure something out."

Getting help and therapy, you learn to be with somebody,

and you learn, you know, what not to do and what to do.

It's so much hard work and effort,

but at the same time, it's starting to work.

We've been better since, bro, you know?

- Listen.

You guys are persistent. You want to be together.

- Yeah, so-- - You know?

- Exactly, right? - I gotta give you that.

- Yeah, yeah. - Like, as crazy as it is--

- Yeah, no, I know.

- You want to [bleep] make it work.

If they are working out and it's been quiet on TMZ,

and he tells me that they're going to counseling,

then maybe it's working.

- You talk to Mike at all?

- I've talked to him just through email.

- Yeah. I talked to him on his birthday.

- Yeah. Me too. - Yeah.

- It's just, he didn't get out as early as we thought.

all: When? - When?

- June? - Oh, my gosh!

- He got our hopes up when he said

he was gonna get out, you know? - Yeah.

- I got so excited thinking

that he was gonna come home early,

'cause he deserves to come home early.

Like, no one thought that he was gonna do the whole time,

because they gave him a lot of time for his crime.

He'll be out before we know it, and we'll look back on it--

I can't believe it's, like, almost over, you know?

- He has, what, a month left, if that?

- Yeah. So Pauly's in town.

And he's Djing at Headliners for, like, a--

- For the cancer event, right? - Yeah.

I think I might drop by there if you want to go.

- We should go to dinner, if anything.

- I'm down. Oh!

- Ah!

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- All right. On my way.

So I will take that, thank you.

Food called me in Chili's.

I'm loving this app.

You just hit a few buttons, you go,

you pick up your food, and you're done.

Perfect.

[phone line trilling]

- Hello? - Hey, b*tch.

I got us Chili's.

We'll drink some wine, and we'll catch up.

I haven't seen the girls since the baby,

nor have I drank with them in, like, a year,

so this is gonna be amazing.

♪ ♪

Cheers to girls night.

- Cheers to girls night. - Ooh. Let me join.

- I'm not pregnant anymore.

both: Whoo! - This is my first time

drinking with you since Angelo, right?

- Cheers. - Cheers.

- Mother of three. - God bless.

- Mm-hmm. So how was Vegas? - I don't even remember Vegas.

- She was telling me Angelina did some [bleep].

♪ ♪

- God, I don't want to get in the middle of it.

- Listen, we need to figure out what happened.

- After hearing Angelina's side of the story,

I feel like I'm gonna be playing peacemaker here

between these two groups of girls,

and it's like, I can't.

And where's my wine?

This whole thing is [bleep]ing [bleep] up.

- What happened in Vegas? - What do you mean?

- The [bleep] clown.

Do I have to knock this guy's teeth out?

- Holy [bleep], like,

now Chris is saying he has to punch Zack.

This has gone, like, way too far.

- I'm [bleep] pissed right now. - Oh, God.

What are you gonna do?

- We'll find out.

♪ ♪

- ♪ Hey, I get right ♪

♪ And then I do my thing for me ♪

- You want to hold my hand?

Let me get that door for you.

- Thanks, babe. Three, please.

- Hey. - Hey, what up, my dude?

- When'd you get here?Today?

- Yeah.

I had a show in D.C. last night,

Vegas before that,

and Vegas tomorrow.

It's like... ping-pong ball.

I'm only here for one night.

Unfortunately, I'm gonna miss the baptism, but tonight,

I'm DJing a charity event at Headliners.

- All right, so are you gonna get to the bottom

of this [bleep] with Angelina tonight

so you can stop bringing it up, or...

- I want to know what happened, like...

- I'm gonna reenact it. - Yeah, show me, 'cause--

- So... - I need a visual.

- So I'll be Zack. Ronnie, you be--

- Angelina. - You be Jenni. You be Jenni.

No, no, no. You be Jenni.

- I want to be Angelina. - You're Angelina.

- I want to be the one that makes out with Zack.

- Yeah.

- I want to be the one that touches your a*s.

- Okay. All right.

You stand over here to the left.

- All right. - Pauly to the left.

- Pauly to the left. - Yeah.

- Wait. Who am I? I want to get into character.

- You are Angelina. - Turned around, or like this?

- Turn around, turn around.

So now you're blacked-out drunk, right?

And you're Jenni.

[cheers and applause]

You don't know what's going on.

- She said she blacked out. Did she black out?

- I must have blacked out too, 'cause she said she--

- Jenni never blacked out. We've always blacked out.

- She said she fell, and I was like,

"I don't remember you falling."

♪ ♪

- She turned into a meatball, and I wasn't there to see it.

- So now he's dancing like this--

- Now I'm dancing?

- You're, like, kind of like, "Yeah."

Be Angelina, frolicking, whatever.

- I didn't even see the little grab that Vinny says he saw.

♪ ♪

- What grab? - But he's like this.

He grabs the side of her hip right here...

- But why? - And he starts dancing

with both of them like this.

- Okay. - So he made the first move.

- Yeah. - But Jenni's right here.

- Jenni's right here in between his legs.

- Did she see this going on?

- Couldn't tell you, I-- - Honestly, I was very drunk.

I had a lot of champagne.

- Oh.

A lot.

- Champagne? You're classy! - Yeah.

- Wow. - I mean, yeah, I'm so classy,

I don't remember [bleep].

- I don't know exactly what happened right there,

but all I do know is... - Okay.

- You cheated, so--you cheated. - Yeah.

- And you're not even in a relationship.

- Angelina did come over to my house today.

- Oh, [bleep]. - She was like, "Deena," like,

you know, "I feel like you're, like,

the closest one I have in the house right now,"

because me and her got close during Vegas.

- Oh.

- Oh, and I was like-- she's like,

"You know, I just need one person to have my back."

- Have her back about what, though?

- I think just in general.

I'm trying to defend Angelina to Nicole and Jenni,

but it's hard to defend someone

when it comes to getting so close to someone's man.

I mean, if I was Jenni, I would be upset too.

Like, let's be real.

She's like, "You know, I really didn't kiss Zack.

You have no idea what I'm going through."

- Yeah, what was that about? - I don't know.

And then she just got emotional.

- 'Cause she's guilty.

I would cry too if I was like,

"Damn, I got [bleep] up and kissed someone."

- She swears she didn't kiss Zack.

I don't know what to [bleep] believe.

- Sounds like a game of telephone.

Jenni doesn't know, 'cause she was drunk,

so it's, like, tough.

It's like Zack's word against Angelina's.

- That's why we gotta invite her out tonight.

- Angelina says nothing ever happened.

- Should I text her? - Yeah.

- Yeah, but, like, ask her, like, what really happened.

She'll tell you.

I don't know if she's gonna lie.

- Zack's literally like, "I have nothing to hide.

I would never disrespect you."

He hasn't even, like, flinched over it.

- Holy [bleep]. - It's like... believe:

the person that we technically

have known for ten years and a guy that we've met once?

- Well, I put you at separate tables at the baptism.

- That's okay. - Wonderful.

- Because I'm not trying to [bleep] have that [bleep].

- I wonder what's gonna happen when Angelina sees Jenni.

Like, are they gonna fight at the baptism?

Like, there's that much drama right now.

- No drama. - Everyone's going to have

a good time. It's for CJ.

- I'm not. - It's all about CJ.

- Something's gonna happen-- somebody's gonna have one

too many glasses of wine, and...

- Oh, man. - Anybody that brings drama,

I'm saying, "Get the [bleep] out,

and we'll deal with this later."

- Exactly.

♪ ♪

- ♪ Party, party, party, party ♪

♪ Party, party, party, party, party, party, party, party ♪

♪ Party plan, push that system, bring the heat ♪

♪ So the whole world listen ♪

♪ ♪

- Tonight, we have a really big event.

It's one of the things I love to DJ most,

is give back, and this is for the "[bleep] Cancer" event.

- You're in the mix right now with DJ Pauly D!

♪ ♪

- When I say "[bleep]," you say "cancer."

[bleep]. all: Cancer.

- [bleep]. all: Cancer.

- Shout out to my "Jersey Shore" roommates

in the building.

♪ ♪

Hey, you made it.

♪ ♪

Who came to [bleep] dance?

Make some noise right now!

♪ ♪

This is such an important cause to me

because my uncle just passed away of cancer,

so I really appreciate my roommates

coming out to support me for that good cause.

Shout out to my "Jersey Shore" family!

- I'm still hanging out. - All right then.

- Well, Vinny, it was nice to see you tonight.

- Angelina, always a pleasure. - Oh, Vinny, let me ask you,

by the way, what happened in Vegas?

- What do you mean? - The [bleep] clown.

Do I have to knock this guy's teeth out?

♪ ♪

- Holy [bleep], like,

now Chris is saying he has to punch Zack.

This has gone, like, way too far.

- Yeah, he grabbed her or something, like--

I know you were there the whole time.

- No, I saw, yeah.

No, he was just dancing with both of them.

You know, like he, like, Jenni was, like, in between his legs,

and Angelina was there, and then he, like,

was just dancing with them.

I don't know, like, honestly, I'd be upset too,

but we have a baptism tomorrow.

I hope he doesn't do something stupid and cause drama.

I love Chris, but Zack is, like, years younger.

The kid's, like, a wrestler, eats babies

and whey protein all day, you know?

Like, Chris doesn't stand a chance.

Honestly, where that kid went wrong was, like,

as soon as he met her...

- Yeah, he-- - Starting to--

- Exactly. - He--

- Got too comfortable too quick.

- Make her the--we'd make her the butt of the joke,

'cause we're, like, her family.

- Exactly. - Yeah.

Like, when you clown around with me,

I feel like it's so much lighter with you boys,

but when Zack did it, I feel it's disrespect,

and I don't like when people try to--

- Oh, oh, oh. - Oh, oh!

- Oh. - Oh, my God.

- Oh, get down. - Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

- What's wrong with that person?

- Dude, are you kidding me?

She's [bleep]. I feel bad.

- I love how the EMT is like,

"Oh, my [bleep] God."

- This is not-- you are not gonna do that.

- "What do I do?" - "Let's get her a coffee."

- "What do I do?" - All right.

- All right, I know you want to go.

I know you want to go. - I want to go home.

You guys gotta figure this out with the girls.

- We'll see you at the baptism. - The guys are so amazing.

It seems like they actually have my back in this.

- All right, guys. - All right.

- Good night. Bye, Vinny, bye, Ron.

And I'm hoping that when this all comes to a head,

they're gonna have my back then too.

- For the record, you called Angelina family tonight.

- Did I say that? - Yes. That's what you said.

- [in slow motion] 'Cause we're, like,

her family.

- I will never let this go: Vinny calling Angelina family.

[in slow motion] - Her family.

Ah, [bleep].

- I'm so scared about going to this baptism.

I'm dreading today.

Chris has got, like, a real temper,

and I don't know what to expect.

- What a [bleep] dirtbag.

- Oh, [bleep]. Here it goes.

- I'm gonna [bleep] k*ll this guy.

- Shut up.

- What the hell?

[upbeat music]

[singer vocalizing]

♪ ♪

- Hi, handsome! Today's your day!

This is a huge day for CJ.

He's getting baptized. He's going into the faith.

All of our family's coming up.

Maybe if everybody wants to head to the church,

and then we'll be right behind you.

It's, like, a huge thing,

so if anybody starts anything at my son's baptism,

I'll throw all their asses out.

- CJ, you ready?

[baby babbling]

♪ ♪

- Chris, I'm [bleep] my pants right now,

because I'm so scared about going to this baptism.

I'm dreading today,

'cause I don't know what to expect.

- Oh, who's gonna be there?

Vinny's going. Ronnie's going.

- John Cena on crack's gonna be there, I'm sure.

- So it should be fun.

- Jenni and Zack will be there,

so I'm a little nervous.

Chris has got, like, a real temper,

and if starts up with me,

Chris will probably kick his a*s.

I need alcohol, stat.

- You nervous to see him?

- Is he nervous to see me

after what he tried to pull on me,

or is she nervous to see me

because she's full of dog [bleep]?

- Can't curse when you go in church.

- All right, I can-- I'll try.

♪ ♪

- ♪ You lift me up, up, up ♪

- Hi!

- ♪ You lift me up, up, up ♪

- Hope when you walk in, it doesn't burst into flames.

- What? Oh, jeez.

It's like, they're in the middle of this right now.

- Oh, God. - Oh, I hate this.

- See that the divine life

which God gives them is kept safe.

- I sit down at church.

I'm, like, trying to just, like, scope everything out.

I don't see Jenni anywhere.

Where's Jenni?

I don't know why Jenni's not showing up right now,

but maybe she's scared to see me

because she knows this is all [bleep].

Hallelujah, thank God, no problems today, hopefully.

- ♪ Right now, the light is in the sun ♪

- I cannot believe my little man is getting baptized.

It just is such a special moment.

♪ ♪

- You have been baptized.

Hallelujah, hallelujah.

- Feels so nice to be surrounded with

so many friends and family.

Just means everything to me.

- Congrats, Mama. - Thank you.

♪ ♪

- Well, Sissy's gonna dance at the party.

All right, I'll see you guys there.

- All right. We'll see you guys there.

- Yeah, I'll see you in a bit. - Okay.

♪ ♪

How cute is this?

- So cute. - Is this a fun party, Mama?

God, this is like a wedding.

- I would say a baptism for Italians

is just as big as a wedding.

We have a DJ.

I have a photo booth, a bar, and, of course,

a ton of food-- antepast, sausage and peppers,

all the good stuff--

and we have a lot of kids at this baptism,

so it better be a drama-free day.

I mean, this is a baptism. It's about faith.

We're Catholic. Let's keep it classy.

Guys, we're taking a shot for CJ.

To CJ!

all: To CJ!

- Whoo!

- Jenni wasn't at the church.

Do you think she's gonna show up to the party?

- I don't know.

- It's probably better for me if she doesn't go.

I'm hoping and I'm praying that she doesn't show up,

because if she does, sh*t might hit the fan,

and then it might become a huge problem.

I think Jenni's gonna gorilla slam me into one of the tables.

- We'll see. - Let's find our table.

- We're at different tables. - You are?

- I think so. Yeah. - What?

- So Deena's terrified that there's gonna be drama

at CJ's baptism,

so she put me and Jenni at one table,

and then she put all the other roomies at another table

so there's no beef.

Hey, over there.

Paul. You could come hang out.

- No, you stay on your side. - Okay.

- We don't want you over here anyway.

- I actually really like Nicole,

but then she got involved in this.

There would have been no problems with me and her

if she would've just minded her own business.

- She'll see. Don't worry. The truth will come out.

- [sighs] Here we go, Chris.

♪ ♪

I told Deena at her house,

"Listen, I will not do anything

"at your son's baptism party, but you know what?

"If the girls come at me,

I'm not gonna back down."

- What up?

- Want to sit here, or you want me to go there?

♪ ♪

- Yeah. - Where's Jenni?

♪ ♪

- They're not here. - Really?

Oh, my God.

I might be able to actually enjoy today.

- It's a party.

Oh.

- Damn it.

Ugh.

Here we go.

- Where's Aunt Nicole?

If Angelina gets out of line at the baptism party,

and if anything is said,

I don't know how I'm gonna react.

Hi!

- You made it!

Hi, Greyson!

Hey!

- How are you? - Nice to finally meet you.

♪ ♪

- I'm not even gonna look up, because I know

that if I look up and I look her in the eyes,

something's gonna be said,

and I'm thinking, "Baptism, baptism, baptism."

- Say "hi." - Can you say "hi"?

- Say, "Hi, Aunt Jenni."

- He doesn't do well at churches

or we would have went.

- Yeah, that's fine. Hi, Grey.

- JWOWW and Nicole sitting at different tables--

it's so awkward.

- My roommate's over there.

One big happy family.

- Deena probably wanted to avoid drama today at all costs,

but CJ is oblivious, he's just a baby.

He's just like... [vocalizes] You know?

And the fact that they're not talking to each other at all,

I think it makes it worse.

- Huh?

- No.

- Go to the bar, get a drink?

- Do you want anything? - Wine.

♪ ♪

- What?

♪ ♪

- I need a pinot noir. - Okay.

- What a [bleep] dirtbag. - Stop.

Zack is right next to me,

and ever since Vegas, Chris has been like,

"Should I knock this guy the [bleep] out?"

I just feel his hand go right on me.

- No! - Uh-huh.

- [bleep] pissed right now. - Oh, God.

What are you gonna do?

- We'll find out.

- Zack might be some wannabe pro wrestler

that makes $ a pop in a high school right now,

but my fiancé will [bleep] k*ll you.

- I'm gonna [bleep] k*ll this guy.

- Shut up.

- Hi! - You made it!

Nice to finally meet you.

- Go to the bar.

♪ ♪

- What?

♪ ♪

- I need a pinot noir. - Okay.

- What a [bleep] dirtbag. - Stop.

I don't know.

Do they have security at church parties?

- I'm gonna [bleep] k*ll this guy.

- Stop.

I'm gonna need one.

♪ ♪

I'm like, "We're at a baptism.

Don't do that to me."

- Please put your hands together

for the little man of the day.

Let's hear it for Christopher John Buckner.

- Let me get another wine. Then we'll dance.

I definitely feel tension in the room,

but, I mean, not my issue.

I'm just excited to drink my wine,

dance on the dance floor with Sissy,

and just have a good time.

Let's go dance!

♪ ♪

- Yeah, Greyson!

♪ ♪

- Honestly, I never thought a baptism could be so fun.

It was like Sunday Funday-- we had a DJ,

dancing, the family all together, good food,

so I'm gonna go to more baptisms.

I'm gonna see if there are any in the area

that I can just drop in on.

- ♪ Fun, fun, fun ♪

♪ We're gonna have a fun fiesta ♪

♪ Fiesta ♪

[dramatic music]

- Don't be mad at me. I didn't do anything.

- Oh, that's cute, Nicole.

- I texted you to let you know

what happened because I black out sometimes.

- She's texting me saying, "What happened in Vegas?

"Did you make it a big deal that he was dancing with you?

I'm hearing that you're trying to kiss Zack."

- Huh?

- I [bleep] up sometimes,

and I get drunk, and I'm like,

"What the [bleep] did I do?"

That's why I texted you,

to be like, "Girl, you were drunk.

This is what I was hearing about you."

- Nicole, I get it, but, like, you know, you weren't there,

so, like, you don't know what really happened.

The people that were there only know what happened.

When I saw those text messages, I was like, "Why"--like, I--

- But I wasn't accusing you. - It was like devil's advocate.

I kind of, like, feel like, all right,

you're her best friend, so you're gonna get involved,

but then I'm like, "Why would she get involved?"

- b*tch, this isn't high school.

- "Why would she get involved?"

- I was helping you out as a friend.

And I'm like, I'm trying to help you.

- Nicole, you weren't there. - So read your texts over.

Because I'm not like that.

I'm not the d*ck that you think I am.

- I don't think you're a d*ck. I just think that

you're defending somebody you shouldn't be defending.

You weren't there. - I'm not defending anyone.

I was just letting you know what I heard.

- Fake news. It's all bull[bleep].

- That's it. I can't do this.

I'm not gonna fight with the girl,

so I know Deena's not gonna be upset with me.

I'm not gonna start a scene.

That's just not what I'm gonna do.

I need to get out of here before something happens,

'cause I don't want to lose a friend over this.

♪ ♪

- Oh, [bleep]. Here it goes. I didn't do anything to her.

- I mean, she probably feel like

your text message issue-- that's why.

- Did you read the text message?

- No, but... - Okay.

- I'm just saying, from what she said...

- Read the text message I sent her.

- Well, she hasn't shown it. - Exactly.

[bleep] me for trying to help her out,

but obviously, it backfired, and I'm annoyed.

♪ ♪

- Oh, God. - What the hell was that?

Do you see what we deal with?

We deal with nothing but [bleep] two-year-olds

and [bleep] cradle robbers.

I'm not doing it.

I got through the baptism,

but I was being cool for Deena.

We're all gonna be hanging out at a new Shore house

in a couple of days, and me and the girls

still have a lot of things we have to settle,

or this [bleep]'s gonna freaking blow up.

- How long are we gonna drag this out for?

We still don't know what she did.

- I was being a friend to Angelina,

and Jenni at the same time.

- We still don't know.

You should have never even have texted her.

You should have just left it.

- Read my text and then talk with me.

- I'm seriously worried about the next time

we're gonna be together.

The baptism, that was, like, a spiritual event.

Like, Jesus was present in the room keeping us safe.

Jesus ain't gonna be in the Shore house.

- Time to try me now. My--

- Try me? Try me?

- I don't even know what is going on right now.

- If you put yourself out in the public with your story--

- What are you talking about?

- Like, this has escalated

into so much personal [bleep].

- [bleep]. What are you talking about?

- Now it's an all-out w*r.

- Put that [...] finger in my--

- I swear to-- - [screams]

[glass shatters]

- That's why people have rematches!