01x01 - Pilot

[bunniefuu]

[phone rings]

[ringing stops]

[sighs]

Who's asking?

[upbeat jazz playing]

You don't have to be up.

Oh yeah?

Stay home.

Stay home, with you?

Yeah.

And read comic books all day?

Yeah.

Okay.

I'll just tell them I'm not coming.

You can just be a little late.

I-I'm so late.

[Andrea screams]

[Jeremy laughs]

Who's asking?

Who's asking?

Who's asking?

It's-- I'm just so--

It's okay. Yeah.

-I'm still waking up.

-Sure.

But it will go. It'll go. We'll do it.

Who's askin'?

[Jeremy moans]

[Andrea moans]

[sighs]

-[Andrea] I've gotta go. I'm so late.

-[Jeremy] It's--

[Andrea] I have to go.

Yeah. I need my arm.

I need to take my arm to work. Thank you.

[Jeremy] Okay.

[Andrea sighs]

I'm-- I'm still wakin' up. It's just--

No, no, it's fine.

I'm just-- I'm so late, J. I gotta move.

f*ck.

[upbeat jazz continues]

Who's asking?

[clears throat]

Who's asking?

[phone rings]

Hey, man. What's up?

Uh, I gotta leave here pretty soon.

Should be, uh,

up there in an hour.

Oh. Okay. Cool.

To run lines.

Yes. Right, right. Of course. Um

-You got the sides, right?

-Uh

[Seth] I emailed them

to you on Monday.

Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I got 'em. I got 'em.

-It's a cool script, man. Cool role.

-[Seth] Yeah.

Yeah, no, should be

a good one. I'm excited.

[Jeremy] Yeah, you should be.

All right, man. Get over here.

Let's get into it.

[Seth] All right.

I'll see you in a bit.

Oh, hey, Jer-- Jeremy.

Yeah.

Don't be stoned.

-Uh, for sure.

-[Seth] Fine.

-[Jeremy] Yeah, of course.

-Later.

[Jeremy] Yeah.

[upbeat music playing]

[pants]

[phone dings]

Oh.

What do we have here?

Hello, Cassandra.

[Jeremy exhales]

[phone ringing]

f*ck.

[ringing stops]

Jeremy!

[pants]

[dings]

-[ringing]

-f*ck!

[Seth] The guy in this photo

is wearing glasses.

I wasn't wearing glasses last night.

Happy New Year, Coach.

-That was good.

-Yeah. How's that?

Yeah, yeah. It was good. It was solid.

Is that, like-- [whistles]

Like, like, I want-- Was the ending,

like, laser-- like, focused in.

Yeah. I was, like,

a little uncomfortable almost.

-It was good.

-[Seth] Oh, good.

That means, like,

I was carrying the power.

[Jeremy] Yeah. I guess

that was my only, like note, um,

is that,

there is, like, one time when you say,

uh, you say "wouldn't it" twice.

"and that wouldn't it" and then I think

you said "wouldn't it" again.

-[Seth] Can you read the line?

-"You like what you see?

Wouldn't it just be phenomenal

for me to look you

right in the eye and confess?

Wouldn't it save you

all this work and time?

-Phenomenal, am I right?"

-Two "wouldn't its"?

-Yeah, two "wouldn't its."

-Gotcha, gotcha.

It's just all about the delivery

of the last line

settling back into that and then

-Yeah.

gettin' out of there, so

That last line

is kind of a trap, isn't it?

Well, a little bit, it can be,

as long as I'm committed--

[Jeremy] Well, let's just try

some different choices.

Try it like, you're, like, sad.

Inside, you know?

Happy New Year, Coach.

Hmm.

I feel like there needs to be,

like, um, like, a little pain

to your charac--

like, okay, so try it like you--

-All right, maybe--

-Try it like you just--

Like you just got s--

like, stung by a bee.

But you are trying to hide the pain,

like, internalize the pain.

Like, internalize,

like, that's some intense pain.

[sniffs]

Happy New Year, Coach.

I think the first way

you did it was great.

-In the scene?

-Yeah.

When was that?

I dunno, I just wanted to try

some new motivations.

-Okay, okay.

-But you're good.

You-- You loosened it up.

-You're good.

-All right, let's do it again.

[Seth] You should be

going in on this, man.

Did you call your reps about it?

Nah, I mean, I'm not--

I just can't jump back into it

with, like, a feature audition.

I haven't auditioned in a long time, dude.

I feel like the longer

you're out of the game,

the more rusty you're gonna be.

[Jeremy] Yeah, well, I don't know.

That's not necessarily true.

I mean, I feel like

when I go in there now,

all they see is Luke from Eternal.

Why try to fight that? Why not just wait

until some time has passed, you know?

That's exactly what got you

in the room though.

It's also, dude, it's been--

it's been five years.

Like, the show's off the air.

f*ck. Five years.

People need to see you

and they need to see you now.

You gotta get in rooms.

Yeah. You're probably right.

You're probably right.

I'll get into it again,

just, you know, not this time.

This is all you, dude.

This is all you, buddy.

Where's, uh, where's Andrea at?

She's shootin'.

-Oh, yeah?

-Yeah. She's down at the studio.

-Is she?

-She left this morning.

Did you see her on her,

uh, Snapchat last night?

What was that-- What was that g*n

that she was sh**ting?

Um

[Seth] Your wife's a badass.

Yeah, that was--

Yeah, that was pretty dope, right?

Feds, man. Show is k*lling it.

Yeah. Yeah. It really is.

You need to, uh, just, like,

walk around that set and be, like,

"Hm. I'm available. Here I am.

Hire me.

Hi, I'm Jeremy. I act.

You might know me from Eternal."

"Oh, you're from Eternal?

No, you're, actually--

We can't have you on the show."

[laughs]

-What are you lookin' at?

-Uh

-What is that?

-This is, um,

let me just show you.

[Jeremy] That is, uh, Cassandra.

Who's Cassandra?

I guess she's in LA supposedly.

I, uh, I dunno, dude.

She just DM'ed me, like, this morning.

You been talkin' to her?

[Jeremy] No, I mean, I kinda just said hi.

You know?

She said hi, I said hi.

I was just being polite.

-What's the endgame here?

-Dude, it's harmless.

Nothing's gonna come of it.

I'm never gonna see this girl.

How do you know that?

What if she continues to text you

and starts texting you more and more,

and then you're asleep at night,

and Andrea gets up to go to the bathroom,

and then she happens

to text you at that time.

Nah, that's not gonna happen.

[Seth] Then Andrea looks at your phone

and then-- [snaps fingers]

Just want to be devil's advocate

for a second.

Well, Andrea doesn't check my phone.

I don't check her phone.

We respect each other's privacy.

That's kinda takin' advantage

of respecting each other's privacy

a little bit.

Yeah.

You're right.

[Seth holding tongue]

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I,

J, K, L, M, N, O, P,

Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X,

Y and Z.

Seahorse. Shine shoes.

With a shell, by the seashore.

Seahorse shine shoes with a shell by the--

Who--Who's askin'?

Back it up.

[romantic music plays]

[inaudible]

[car honks]

[sighs]

[sniffles]

[elevator dings]

-[man] That's what it's called.

-[woman] Okay.

Yes, it's out in the desert--

[woman] No! You gotta come

to Trayton's birthday party.

-I'll be there.

-Okay. Saturday. Ten-thirty.

-Of course, I'll be there. Your house?

-It's a spooky-- My house.

-Okay, cool.

-Spooky theme.

-[man] Sweet.

-He's gonna love it.

He misses you.

Aw. I'll text you about it.

You just give me all the info.

-Okay, I'll just text you.

-Cool.

Seth! What's goin' on, dude?

How ya been, how ya been?

-Good to see you, dude.

-Yeah, it's been, like, a few months.

Yeah, yeah. Listen, it was, um--

-The Run.

-The Run. Yeah, it was The Run.

-Yeah, it was great. It was cool.

-Yeah.

You ever hear anything back on that?

-Oh, I actually got it.

-What?

-Yeah, I got it.

-Oh, wow.

-It was-- It was

-Damn.

south of, uh, uh--

we were, like, right in Spain.

Right in the middle of Spain.

Yeah, it was beautiful.

Great time of year. It's, like--

-Dude.

-[sighs] It's the best thing.

-That's awesome. Congratulations.

-Yeah, it's awesome.

How's, uh, Isabella?

Oh, um, she's good. Yeah, I think so.

Like, she posts a lot of stuff.

She's workin' a lot.

-Bulgaria.

-Yup, yup. Yeah.

Looks pretty cool. Picking Daisy.

Dude, that show is, like,

it's goin' to the stratosphere.

Every-- Every time I see the ratings,

it's, like, "Wow.

I can't believe it's, you know-- "

Yeah. Well, we, uh--

We're not seeing each other anymore.

Oh, I didn't know that, dude.

I'm so sorry.

-Cool, dude.

-Awesome.

-Go, um, go book it!

-Yeah, dude. All right.

-Break a leg, all right?

-All right, see you later.

[suspenseful music plays]

Jesus Christ.

[Sonny] It's overwhelming, but I need--

I need to have a bigger shop. Yeah?

-Hey. You want a drink?

-[Jeremy] Yeah! Cheers. Right on.

-[Sonny] It's a little smokey.

-[Jeremy] Whoo.

[Sonny] Uh, how you been? What's new?

You know, I haven't auditioned

a lot lately

so if it's, like, if you don't audition,

the jobs don't really--

I feel like you were saying that

last time you were in here.

That's true, that's true.

I was. Honestly, Andrea.

You know my wife, Andrea?

We bought the house together.

I haven't really been able to cover

as much of the mortgage

as I would've liked, you know? Lately.

I'll-- I'll pull my weight here eventually

but I'm kinda doin'

the stay-at-home-husband thing,

I guess, right now.

Yeah. It works. It works.

You know, you're always on the right path.

What do you think about that?

It's cliché, it's generic.

But you stop and think,

"Is this the place where I need to be?"

Do you feel that this is where

you're supposed to be?

Uh, yeah, man.

I mean, I don't know. [chuckles]

[Sonny] You got this. You got this.

I know you got this

because I've been your show

[moving string music plays]

[Seth clears throat, sniffs]

Yeah, that was great. Yeah.

Will there be callbacks, or--

No, I'll let you know, okay?

Thanks. All right, uh, Seth.

[clears throat]

-You're up.

-[Seth] Yeah.

[woman] April,

can you come run camera for me?

Yeah. Mm-hmm.

[Seth] The guy in this photo

is wearing glasses.

I wasn't wearing glasses last night.

Happy New Year, Coach.

-All right.

-Good. That's really good.

-[Seth] Yeah?

-Great. What's your name again?

-Uh, Seth.

-Seth.

Where did you go to school, Seth?

UC Davis.

UC whe-- What did you study?

Well, theater.

There's a theater department in UC Davis?

-[Seth] Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

-Really?

-[Seth] Uh, yeah, yeah.

-[speaks indistinctly]

Weird. That really surprises me.

You're great. What year did you--

When did you finish?

Oh, um, actually I didn't finish.

Yeah, I booked Eternal.

And so it-- it took me out of school.

What is-- What is Eternal?

I told you about it. It's like a--

It's like a big TV show

about, like, vampires.

Like, teenage vampires.

[director] Oh, it was

like a soap opera kind of thing.

No, it was, yeah, it wasn't a soap opera.

It was just, like, a teen drama.

Um, yeah.

Like a-- Like Twilight.

-Like Twilight.

-Okay.

But-- But better than that.

Huh. I've never seen it.

I knew that was a thing though

for a minute.

I mean, you're really--

you're really a great actor.

-Uh, yeah, so

-Thanks, man.

We, uh-- I actually I wanna do,

you know, I wanna do the next scene.

-If that's okay.

-Okay, good.

Uh, I only got one set of sides.

This isn't really--

uh, there's not many lines here.

It's gonna be an improvised scene.

It's more kind of sounds

and physicalities.

So did you do any physical work

at the UC Davis theater

program department?

Um, uh, yeah. You know, we had to play

to the theater, so

-Cool. Cool, so--

-I was in a lot of big stuff.

So, yeah, just, like, you know,

imagine in Jurassic Park

they did the little, uh,

ba*ls on the sticks for the dinosaurs,

stuff like that. That's kinda what

we're gonna do here.

So this, the pillow is gonna be

your love interest, Kara.

Did you read the--

you read the script, right? Yeah?

Yes. Yeah, yeah.

The scene in the trailer where they--

-You know.

-[Seth] Oh.

What do you wanna say?

Where they consummate their rela--

-Where they have sex with each other, so.

-Oh, where they--

Yeah, so just--

just use the pillows sort of,

as-- as your scene.

-You want the pillow to be her.

-Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Okay. Need me to just kinda--

-Okay, okay. Yeah, yeah.

-So whenever you're ready,

just, like, come dive right in

and-- and just--

We're gonna kinda start

in the middle of this whole thing, so

Yeah, um-- [clears throat]

[director] You know, can you actually,

can we get it from the opposite angle?

-It's gonna be a little better for us.

-[Seth] Oh, okay.

-[director] If we could go--

-[Seth] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That way April can see your face

and not, you know

-Yeah

-the other side of you.

[April] Both look great though.

[grunts] This way?

[director] Yeah, right. Go right for it.

Are you guys recording this?

[director] Yeah.

We're recording everything.

We're ready. Go for it.

And you're inside of her

and good.

Great.

And we're closer to the end now,

so it's a little faster.

Really go for it.

Really bring it home.

This is a very, like, passion-

Imagine you're covered in sweat.

-[Seth grunting]

-It's the middle of summer.

That's great. Can we do

Mednocino Farms for lunch?

-Oh, yeah. I love Mendocino Farms.

-Yeah.

-[Seth grunts]

-[director whispering inaudibly]

Don't finish yet!

[Seth] Good?

Just a little bit longer.

[director] Yeah, put in some stroking

with your humping.

[pants] Some what?

[director] Some stroking with the humping?

-So it's a little bit of both.

-Okay.

[director] It's sexual,

but it's also aggressive.

[casting director] It's a dichotomy.

It's a dichotomy

[director] Sort of like--

[casting director]

we're still trying to get.

[director] And you are coming up

to the summit of Mt. Everest.

And you're almost there.

And you're really gettin' after it.

Really gettin' after it.

And you are finishing.

-Good. And you are still finishing.

-[Seth grunts]

And it's great. And it's fantastic.

And you are done!

Great, great. Now, love. Now there's love.

Go ahead and just caress her face

a little bit.

Nice. And kiss her

right on the forehead there.

It's great. Go ahead

and say her name for me.

[dings]

Hm.

[dings]

[inhales]

[exhales]

Hey, it's me.

I'm just, uh,

I dunno, I'm just callin' to say hi.

I hope you're having a great day.

It's beautiful out there.

Um, yeah, just here holdin' down the fort

so just give me a call

whenever you get a chance, all right?

I love you. Bye.

Seth Stewart?

-Yeah.

-Oh, my God!

I don't want to, like,

freak out too much.

-It's nice to meet you.

-I'm, like, your biggest fan.

I watched your show every night

of, like, every Thursday night of college.

Like, a lot of people were Team Luke

but I was Team Damien

till the very end. And I--

There we go.

[fan] I can't believe.

I can't believe it.

-I appreciate that.

-I wouldn't-- [chuckles]

[Seth] Um, all right, smile.

Okay. Now, uh, Damien.

Oh, okay.

-Love you! You still got it, man.

-There you go. That's right, I know.

Are you still acting?

Uh, yeah. Yes. Definitely.

-Great!

-Absolutely, yeah.

What are you working on?

Kinda workin' on working at the moment.

-It's, like, you know--

-Oh!

Trying to see what that next gig

is gonna be, but we're out there.

-You know, we're gonna find something.

-Oh, you will.

Yeah. I just came

from an audition, actually, so

-Oh, how'd it go?

-Crossin' my fingers now.

It was, uh,

it was good. It was interesting.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-Very cool.

-All right.

-[fan] So good to see you.

-Hey, very nice to meet you.

Break a leg. Good luck.

[upbeat music plays]

Push it.

[phone rings]

Hello?

[man] Hi, Seth,

I have Jason Riess for you.

Great, thanks.

Seth, how are ya?

[Seth] Good, just running

off that audition.

Oh, yeah, well, you should be happy.

-It went well.

-Yeah? Really?

Yeah, it was really good, man.

They said you did a great job.

Uh, but listen.

They decided that they're gonna go

in a different direction

with that character, okay?

[gulps]

[Seth] What direction are they going in?

[groans] They said

they're gonna go "ethnic."

-Really?

-Yeah.

Listen, man. These things happen, okay?

You know, half the time

they don't even know

what they're looking for in there.

All right? The important thing is,

you made a good impression

with the casting director

and the director.

It's a big deal, but it's in the past.

On to the next.

[Seth] Yeah. Right. Uh, on to the next.

On to the next, babe.

Listen, I gotta take this call, okay?

So just hang in there, all right?

-B-b-b-b-bye!

-Thanks.

[upbeat music continues]

Oh, sorry.

Oh.

[chuckles] Hey.

Hi.

Hey.

Uh

-It's Seth, is it?

-[Isabella] Uh--

-[Seth] Hi.

-Oliver.

-Oh, yeah, yeah. That's right.

-[Oliver] Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you, man.

H-How are you?

-What?

-How are you?

Uh, good.

-Yeah? Yeah?

-Tired.

Um

[Seth] How-- How are you?

I'm good. I'm really good, yeah.

How was Bulgaria?

It was actually incredible.

Stunning, yeah.

-Yeah, it's--

-Quite beautiful.

It's the most romant--

It's just really--

It's just-- I-- Just go.

Just go. One day.

-[Seth] Really beautiful place, huh?

-[Oliver] Yeah.

-Nice. Well, congratulations. I'm, uh

-[Isabella] Yeah.

-It was nice to meet you, man.

-[Oliver] Yeah.

[Isabella] Okay.

Um, uh, sorry.

There you go-- Thanks.

-[Seth] Bye!

-[Isabella] Bye!

[phone rings]

Yo.

Are you home?

Uh, yeah, what's up?

You got whiskey, right?

Yeah.

Then I'm comin' over.

Hey, do you want a banana, dude?

This is about to go bad.

Uh, no. I'm good. Thanks, man.

[Jeremy] You f*cked a pillow.

[Seth] Mm-hmm.

-Are you kidding me?

-Mm-mm.

Why would you do that?

'Cause the director asked me to.

On camera?

Like, it was on tape?

-Yeah.

-Oh, my God.

I respect the commitment, man,

but that is, uh--

that is f*ck' intense.

I'm a little bit worried about you.

That wasn't even the worst part of my day.

I ran into Isabella.

[sighs] I'm sorry, man.

She wasn't alone.

-Mm-hmm.

-Shocker, as well.

"I was in Bulgaria sh**ting this movie

and this British guy was my lead

and I fell in love with him."

Whoa, whoa, whoa, dude. It's not love.

You're right.

She probably thinks it's love

but it's not love, man.

It's just a rebound.

And it's-- it's her way

of moving on, right?

And she was lucky enough

to have a movie to go do

that helped her move on.

Right? And she found that co-star

and that on-set romance.

And that's just what happens, you know?

You've done it.

I've done it. I-- I'm married

because of it, you know?

So don't-- don't think too much

into it, dude.

It's just the natural progression

of things.

I need to work.

It's time to work.

I dunno. Even a play.

Like, I need to get on stage. Something.

Yeah.

I'm not good. I'm like,

-I dunno.

-You're rotting?

-I feel like I'm falling apart.

-Falling apart. Yeah.

It's not-- It's not a good place to be.

Yeah, it's-- it's a terrible hole.

But, um, but you're gonna

climb out of it, man.

-[inhales] Yes.

-I'm gonna help you, all right?

Whoa. Damn, dude.

Holy sh*t.

[chuckles]

-One, two

-[slurring] Okay, okay.

three.

Mmm. Oh, God. I drank a lot.

Jesus, man.

[phone rings]

Hi.

Hey, you. How's your day?

Uh, it's good.

Yeah, it's pretty good.

I mean, we're really behind.

-Oh, that sucks. I'm sorry.

-Yeah.

[Andrea] What are you doin'?

Ooh, just talkin' Seth down off a ledge.

He had, uh, a pretty shitty day.

Ran into Isabella

with her new guy.

sh*t.

Uh, he'll be fine.

You know what he's like.

He's just gotta stop putting

so much pressure on himself.

Did you-- Did you know about this guy?

Yeah, like, she told me about him.

I really gotta go, J.

They're calling me to set.

I can't-- I can't talk.

Oh, okay. Um, what time are you off?

We're so-- We're so behind.

I'm gonna be here till,

like, three AM at least

so don't wait up, okay?

Yeah, hey, I just--

Before you go, I wanted to say, um,

I'm-- I'm sorry, if, uh,

things have been a little bit off

between us lately.

I've just-- I've been in a weird headspace

but I am really looking forward

to this weekend,

spending some quality time

getting back on the same page, you know?

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no.

Listen, don't worry about me, just, um,

have fun with Seth tonight, you know,

just be there with him

[Andrea] And, um, I really got to go.

They're calling me now.

Um, I'll talk to you later, okay?

-Okay, love you.

-[hangs up]

[upbeat music plays]

[inaudible]

Oh, f*ck!

We've been using a one?

-Yeah.

-A one dollar bill?

Yes!

Jesus, use a--

That's disgusting. Come on.

This is a hundred.

-A hundred? Really?

-Yeah.

That's, like, bad for you.

You don't want to use a one.

-But a hundred is better for you?

-Yeah.

You kidding me? [sniffs]

Here, you have that little more

right there.

Can we take another shot?

-Think of something to--

-Uh, to, um

-I'm gonna take this.

-Okay.

Like, I-- I was looking forward

to being 30.

I think that's my point.

I was looking forward

to being 30 because I feel like

everything from my twenties

was gonna be done.

I'm gonna take all the experience,

all the time that I had in my twenties,

apply it to my thirties.

Be that much more knowledgeable.

And more experienced.

-And more successful.

-Mm.

Maybe being 30 is just slowly

but surely realizing

that you don't know f*cking anything.

[Seth] No, that's your twenties, dude.

[Jeremy] What did you learn

in your twenties?

How not to f*ck up.

How not to f*ck up?

Not to do dumb sh*t.

Oh, well. Yeah.

Don't be an idiot.

Yeah. I guess that's what

you're supposed to learn.

[Seth] Mediocrity is not good.

I don't want mediocrity.

I don't want to be mediocre.

Hey, hey.

You can't fail if you don't try.

[sniffs]

Who's that?

That's her best friend.

Who's best friend?

That's Cassandra's best friend.

-That's her friend?

-Yeah.

They're together tonight.

-Right now?

-Yeah.

Call her over.

-f*ck no.

-Mm-hmm.

-Bring her over.

-No, no, no, no, no.

Now, dude, I need this right now.

-Come on!

-Are you f*cking kidding me?

-Come on!

-I got in trouble the other day

because I left that window

in the dining room open overnight

and-- and rainwater got in.

-[Jeremy] I know, she's beautiful.

-Come on.

She's beautiful. Why don't we just--

Why don't we just meet them out?

Why don't we meet them out?

-No, no. No, no, no, no, no.

-That's the solution.

They're already going out.

-They don't want to come over here.

-No, no, no, no, no, no.

We'll just go over there

and hang out with them.

It'll be totally-- It'll be fine.

And then we'll all have a couple drinks

and I'll come home.

Stop! I'm not going out

in public right now.

Why not? You're being so dramatic, dude.

Look at me, look at me.

Does this look like somebody

who wants to be in public right now?

-I'm a f*ck' disaster.

-No!

I'm on cocaine.

I'm gonna bleed in-- in public.

I don't want a nosebleed in Hollywood.

What a f*ck' cliché, dude.

I don't want to be a cliché. Can we just--

Can we not? You f*cked a pillow today.

Dude. [sighs]

[Jeremy] I'm sorry.

That was below the belt.

Dude, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, man.

I want to just drink some liquor with you.

Like, to have a couple friends over.

Seth's friends.

For some reason, if Andrea ever finds out,

they're Seth's friends.

But if I get in trouble,

I'm blaming it on you. That's cool, right?

Well, you're not gonna get in trouble.

All right but if I do, it's your--

-It's on you.

-Just don't hook up with her.

Can you talk to a girl

without hooking up with her?

-Yeah, of course I can.

-Okay, that's fine.

What kind of question is that?

Well, I dunno, dude. I--

I'm sorry. I am sorry.

I didn't mean to offend you.

Andrea's gonna be over at three AM.

-Okay, okay, okay.

-Three AM.

Okay, okay, okay,

all right, all right, all right.

So, you invite 'em over.

We just hang out.

We just-- It's a nice, like-- f*ck, man!

I need some female companionship

for a little bit.

We just hang out

with some girls for a little while.

And then we make them leave at two. Two.

Twelve-thirty.

One-thirty.

They leave at one.

[indistinct chatter]

["Hey Jacques!" by Babetown playing]

[music ends]

And they're gone.

You know psst. Oh!

[moans]

I'm, like, so exhausted.

You know, I just

Thanks for having us over.

That was, yeah.

That was really fun.

A lot of fun.

It's been a really good time.

You know? You know.

[romantic music plays over stereo]

f*ck.

[clears throat]

-Okay.

-Yeah, I'm sorry.

-No, I--

-I'm the one that's married.

Okay.

I'm sorry, this is-- this is on me.

-Did I misread something?

-No.

No, I sent you all the

[sighs]

I just--

I mean, I'm sorry.

That was my fault. I shouldn't have

-It's not your fault.

-done

Listen, you know I'm me.

put you in such a weird position.

I am gonna get an Uber.

And get myself out of this situation.

Okay, I can get you an Uber.

-I can easily get you an Uber.

-Please.

You've done so much tonight.

Oh, f*ck.

I appreciate all of this.

Um, but, I will get out of your hair.

-You su-- You're good?

-And I will find

my way outta here. Yeah.

[music stops]

[pants]

I don't really think you love me

Like I love you ♪

[slow ballad plays]

-Hi! Good morning.

-[Seth chuckles]

We got some Advil. Want some?

I'm okay, thank you.

-Sorry. Just--

-Yeah.

You're in SC?

Yeah. USC Law School.

You remembered. Nice.

That's impressive, though. Law school.

-Super busy, but, you know.

-Yeah.

I was thinking, um, this is a mess,

but I can clean this up

and we can cook some breakfast.

No, I'm-- I'm good. Thank you.

Oh. Okay.

I-- How about I make you some coffee?

I'm fine. Thank you, but I'm good.

Oh, okay. Um

Um

I don't-- I don't date actors.

It's a thing I have, so

Ah, my-- my Uber is here.

So I'm just gonna grab my stuff and

Oh, you gotta--

Um, it's that way.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-Okay. Thanks.

-Well, here-- [chuckles]

Sorry, so rude.

-Okay

-It was fun, it was good to, uh--

Yeah. Great.

-Um

-Bye.

Hey, uh, wait up!

One sec. I was just, uh,

I was thinking

about w-what you said in there

about not dating actors

and I respect that but, uh,

technically I'm unemployed

right now, so

Not an actor.

Honesty. I like it.

Hey, excuse me. Are you Jeremy?

Uh, no, but he-- he lives here.

Oh, okay. Pest Control.

I have an appointment. Can I speak to him?

[Seth] Yeah, one second. I'll get him.

-[Seth] Jeremy! Hey.

-[Jeremy groans]

Uh, pest control guy is here.

He needs to see you.

f*ck. Where's Andrea?

Uh, I don't know.

She's not in the bedroom.

[Jeremy] What?

[Seth] There he is. Up and at 'em.

That a guy. He's outside.

You got laid, huh?

You're way too f*cking chipper.

Hey, man, sorry, my wife,

she probably scheduled this.

Got our wires crossed.

Oh, my God.

Are you Jeremy Davis?

[laughs]

Dude, my little sister loves you.

Now I do, too. I'm tellin' you.

Oh, that's awesome, man.

You gotta say thanks

to your sister for me.

-I absolutely will.

-That's fantastic.

And the fourth season, to me, is the best.

And you've been served.

Have a nice day.

What the f*ck, man?

[sighs]

[water running]

Hey, have you ever thought

about takin' any classes?

Like, an extension?

What?

She's divorcing me.

[Jeremy] Oh, f*ck.

[coughs]

[Seth] Oh, God. Let it out.

Let it out, man. Let it all out.

[indistinct chattering]

["Hey Jacques!" by Babetown playing]