01x03 - Family Dynamics

[bunniefuu]

I'll handle it, Ana.

You have five minutes to leave.

Or else, I'll call the police.

Are you insane?

It's two a.m., as*h*le!

What's wrong with you?

Is my baby girl asleep?

- Bring her so I can see her.

- Ugh.

Like this? Regina would get drunk

just from smelling you.

I miss her, Mariana.

I'm entitled to see her. Aren't I?

- Yeah

- I'm also entitled to kick you out

- if you don't leave right now.

- Shh!

- Don't make me take drastic measures.

- Mmm.

What measures? Don't be ridiculous,

you can't even stand upright.

I'll sue you for ali

Parental "alli-en-iation."

- "Parental alli-en-iation."

- Uh-huh.

It sounds funny,

but has nothing to do with aliens.

- Shh.

- Uh, uh

Shh.

Listen, Mariana, the law is on my side.

What's the point of involving lawyers

and judges in this?

We can come to an arrangement.

Forget it, Pablo, no way.

And tomorrow,

when your hangover is k*lling you,

I hope you realize

how much bullshit you just talked.

Oh she slammed the door on my face.

No, no, no.

You you'll regret this!

A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES

Ceci, please ask your father

to hand me a napkin, will you?

Sure. Dad, will you Okay, thanks.

Here, Mom.

- Thank you, dear.

- Sure.

Rodrigo, tell your mom

she has sauce on her chin, please.

Right here, Mom.

No, Rodrigo, tell her it's a bit lower.

A bit lower.

What's going on?

This always happens

after they've had a fight.

Sweetie, how is

your science project going?

Great, Mom, I just need you to check it.

- Can you check it right now?

- No, sweetie, I have to go.

I can do it.

No, thanks, Dad. I can wait until tonight.

My darling.

Vale!

Awww!

- Oh, baby!

- She's been laughing a lot lately.

- Really?

- She likes raspberries.

Vale!

- Yes.

- So cute.

- Ay, ay!

- Hey, careful.

Here, Vale. Sweetie!

Ohh

Here. There.

Who likes raspberries?

Brr, brr, brr, brr!

Alta, will you bring us more juice?

Please, thank you.

Oh, come to Mommy.

- Come to Mama.

- Yes, go to Mommy.

Stop, you'll make her throw up.

What? She was having a blast.

Kids, tell your dad he's being absurd.

She's not having a blast.

What she has is gas.

She says

You're the dad, for God's sake!

I'm not suing her.

I just wanted to scare her

so she'd let me see the baby.

Conrado says

she kicked you out with a p*stol.

I said she had eyes like a p*stol.

I say you sue her. Use your lawyer friend.

I don't know.

She'll come round on her own.

When has Mariana ever been reasonable?

Don't be a p*ssy.

When we actually file a lawsuit,

Mariana will negotiate, bro.

You think so?

- No!

- Goal, goal. Goal.

Goal.

Trust me, dude.

Yeah, dude.

- That's what I mean. We're men here.

- You bet we are!

Aah!

Boo!

Ay, ay, ay!

Coo, coo, coo!

Ay, ay, ay, ay!

Oh, my sweet baby.

Maybe if you spend more time

with Valentina,

you'll bond with her.

- The issue

- I have no issue bonding with my baby.

She's not laughing

because Juan Carlos almost made her vomit.

I don't need your advice

on how to raise my daughter.

Ah! Hello.

Hello, you!

Why did you take this route, Ramón?

You know the stoplights

are always out of sync.

I followed Waze.

Ana it's me!

Oh, hey!

Hey, girl! How was your delivery?

- Super great. Mm-hm.

- Oh, I'm glad.

You have no idea,

we've missed you at bridge, all of us.

The girls wanted to go to the hospital.

I said it was unnecessary,

because when you've just given birth

the last thing you want is visitors.

Especially at your age.

Huh.

Anyway, it went great.

- Really? Mm-hm.

- Yes, yes.

- That hospital treats you like a queen.

- I know.

- I felt like I was at the Four Seasons.

- Oh, yeah. I saw the pictures you posted.

Those pictures

didn't do the suite justice.

- But what mattered was the baby.

- Sure.

- She must be so huge.

- Huge.

- A giant!

- Yes.

We're all dying to meet her.

So, we're playing bridge

at your house on Friday, okay?

Uh You mean this Friday?

Yes, I'll send it to our group chat.

Friday at Ana's. Whoo-hoo!

Whoo-hoo

- Don't you cancel on us.

- No.

- Love you! Love you!

- Okay, great. Bye.

Last time we take this route, Ramón.

Sorry, ma'am.

Hello?

Ms. Mariana Herrera?

I'm calling on behalf

of Mr. Conrado Fuentes

to schedule negotiations

with our client, Pablo Sandoval.

Mr. Conrado asked me

to deliver this message.

If you refuse to negotiate,

things can get really ugly.

Your wannabe dad is an as*h*le, sweetie.

NANNY WHIP

Hello, darlings.

I am Nanny Whip.

On this video, I will force you

to learn humiliation

and punishment techniques.

For that naughty boy you have at home.

Oh, Nanny Whip has great tips.

Yes. I mean, yes, but

I asked for bonding videos.

You you know, bonding.

Not bondage.

Damn autocorrect.

I think, bro, that this time

you should call a time of death

on your marriage.

No, way, Víctor.

We've been married for 20 years.

That's exactly why,

20 f*cking years is a lot.

And when love runs out, it just does.

Are you spending the next 20 years

going through the motions?

Do you love her?

Of course I love her.

She's my kids' mother,

don't be ridiculous.

Don't give me

that "my kids' mother" bullshit.

I want a real answer.

Do you still love her?

Something to think about.

I'm going to shower. See you.

EARLY STIMULATION

- This.

- This one.

- Yes.

- Yes. This actually looks fun.

Yes. How do people have time for this?

It's only during office hours.

My cousin works in one

that's for working moms.

- Oh, really?

- Yes.

- Only overachiever babies go there.

- That's it.

- That sounds like the perfect place.

- Yes.

- Yes.

- I'll sign you up.

- Please.

- Okay.

Thanks. Who would've thought?

- Pablo isn't here.

- Are you sure?

I just heard his voice.

My client, Mr. Sandoval, isn't here, okay?

Conrado, quit the bullshit,

Pablo never leaves early.

- Mr. Conrado, to you.

- Don't be stupid.

Let me in. Pablo!

Pablo!

Mariana?

- Where's the baby?

- At home with the nanny.

No way I'd bring her here.

Anything you have to say

to my client, you can say to me first.

Pablo, you're crazy.

You're suing me, really?

Since when do you listen to this idiot?

For f*ck's sake!

"Stupid, idiot."

This won't look good in court.

- What court, Pablo?

- You left him no choice, Mrs. Herrera.

I'm not "Mrs." How dare you?

Hey, Pablo! Pablo!

You're sh1tting me!

Pablo, be a man!

Damn.

Mom,

I don't want you to call him.

I was just venting.

I don't want you to call Pablo.

Besides, you won't fix a thing

by calling him.

No, we won't beg at his feet.

You know what?

If he wants to sue me, let him sue me.

Yes.

I have to go, Mom.

We'll talk tomorrow. I love you too.

Bye.

- Who's suing you?

- That idiot, Pablo.

His friend talked him into suing me

for visitation rights for Regina.

- After what he did to me.

- What did he do?

Tell me.

This one's from my grandma. Isn't it cute?

What's wrong?

I've been thinking, Mariana,

I'm not ready to be a dad.

At least not right now.

"Not right now"?

I'm not I'm not offering you a beer.

You could've said so five months ago.

I didn't know what I was saying.

What am I supposed to do about this?

You said we'd be together forever.

I'm sorry, Mariana. I just realized

how much trouble having a baby is.

f*ck you!

"f*ck you."

Let's spice it up with "dumbass."

"Those were the words that the defendant

used in an unwarranted

and unnecessary fashion

to refer to my client."

Yes, just add that I was happy at first.

"I must also underscore

that my client

was very happy."

I'm going to be a dad?

This is the best present ever.

Are you crying?

Sorry, they're tears of joy.

You and I will be together forever.

So you don't think

we should have an ab*rtion?

What? No, no, Mariana.

You and I love each other.

This baby is proof of that.

Imagine how cute it'll be.

With your eyes.

My nose.

She doesn't have your nose.

What? Mariana says I have a button nose.

Sure. What happened next?

What do you mean?

It went to sh*t thanks to you.

Hell, no! How is it my fault?

You f*cking idiot.

Are you having a baby right now?

Holy sh*t, dude. Your life is over.

Why didn't you get an ab*rtion?

I don't know, dude. I don't.

Five months?

And you're only telling us now? f*ck!

First, we wanted to know

if it was a boy or a girl.

And to make matters worse,

you're having a girl.

What if she brings home

a pothead boyfriend like him?

Oh!

Father-in-law!

- Gramps!

- Mm.

You should bail, man, before it gets ugly.

We won't include that.

It's not relevant information. Mm-mm.

Pablo sounds like a real jerk.

He never came back?

Not until now.

Turns out he wants to be a dad after all.

Well, you're right.

Hey, I don't want

that jerk near the girls either.

Go see Laura Villa tomorrow,

she's the best lawyer in Mexico.

A real shark.

If Pablo wants to fight,

we'll give him a fight.

Okay.

There's my sweet baby!

Oh, my Valentina.

Oh! Oh, oh oh!

Don't worry about it,

it's a matter of time. Honestly.

Go to sleep, Mom.

I'll finish it.

No, honey, we'll do it together.

Oh, the letters are turning out great.

They're better than the old ones.

Yes. Dad wouldn't have pushed me.

I would've lost.

No, Ro. Don't judge him.

But you were the first to laugh

when he offered his help.

Yes, and that was wrong.

Dad is good at some things

and I'm good at others. That's why

we complement each other

and make a great team.

Look, is this okay?

I'll be home late today,

I'm taking Valentina to Funboree.

I want to spend more time with her.

- I'll go on Tuesdays and Thursdays, okay?

- Okay.

Mom, this Thursday

is my science fair, you always come.

- Oh, sweetie.

- What if something goes wrong, ma'am?

- We don't want Rodri to lose.

- Nothing will go wrong.

Everything will be okay.

I'll go with you, okay?

Yes, that's a great idea. Hm?

You spending more time

with Valentina is a great idea.

That's what it's about.

- Being a team.

- Mm-hm.

Oh, get a room!

Look, darling!

Look, hey!

Blow slower.

I know how to make bubbles. Thanks.

Sorry I'm late, I had to stop by the vet.

But you know what I mean,

since we're both mothers.

Ana already filled me in on your case

and that huge jerk, Pablo.

All men are the same.

Right, Marjorie?

That's why Daddy can't see you anymore.

Still, he has to pay for her shots,

grooming and therapy.

There's a lot we can do.

- Get him the electric chair?

- Mmm

No, I'm afraid

there's no death penalty in Mexico.

I was kidding.

First come the ants ♪

They're all good friends ♪

They march in a row ♪

They'll run together ♪

Maybe she doesn't like music.

Some babies aren't musical.

She loves music.

In the womb, she listened

to Rachmaninoff, she loves it.

But thanks anyway.

Mariana, this is no joke.

Pablo can get custody of your daughter.

- What?

- Well, he can try.

But don't worry,

I've never lost a case.

Do you remember #ScrewMen?

I made it a trending topic.

You're in very good hands.

Trust me. Right, Marjorie?

Nimo the bunny hid ♪

Boo! He hid ♪

Boo! He hid, boo! ♪

He hid behind his ears ♪

Boo! He taught me the peekaboo game ♪

He hid behind a scarf ♪

Boo! ♪

And he blew it away ♪

Boo! He taught me the peekaboo game ♪

She's not following you.

Well, it's this "rabbit" thing.

Valentina is too sophisticated for that.

Ah. Or you should spend

more time with her.

I'm doing the best I can.

My work is time-consuming.

It's different for those of us

with high-responsibility jobs, you know?

Yes. Well, Rebeca is the Creative Director

at Walter Bronson.

And Leticia has

her own real estate agency.

And, in fact, I am the CEO

of a food packaging company.

And look how well she follows my "boo!"

Boo!

Coo!

There's a great pedagogue,

Harriet Lupkiss.

She's an expert on bonding

and early development.

- If you want, I

- I know who she is, thanks.

I've read all her books.

Why are you reading this crap?

Her methods are outdated.

Really?

Who do you recommend?

Please don't say Nanny Whip,

that woman is scary.

No, I don't know who that is.

I read several authors

as research for my app.

And I think

I could recommend Peter Locust.

He's essential

for understanding Betsy Nest.

On second thought, for this age

it would be good

if you started with Walter Crenshaw.

He's great for the first months.

Yes, okay. But I don't have

the time to read all that.

I know!

Why don't you come to Funboree with me?

I'm better at hands-on learning,

maybe you can give me tips.

Sure, I always wanted to go

to a place like that.

Really?

It's settled, then.

Do you think I wanted

to invite them?

Well, just uninvite them, Ana.

Why do you care

about those bridge-playing snakes?

That's precisely why,

because they're snakes.

I thought going to Funboree

was for Valentina.

Yeah.

That too.

I k*ll two birds with one stone.

When did we start having

such different views in life?

What are you saying?

Maybe we should go to couples therapy.

No.

I know a lot of things

have changed lately,

but there's no need

to tell our problems to a stranger.

No, you and I

can fix all our problems alone.

I'm going to bed.

Mariana

Shh, shh. We agreed you wouldn't speak.

Anything you say

can be used against you.

Marjorie. Behave.

She just hates

the smell of testosterone.

It's nice to see you, Conrado.

She was my teacher in college.

You haven't passed my class.

Colleague

we should negotiate

to reach the best outcome.

Negotiate? Conrado, no.

We, my client and I,

are not here to negotiate.

The only reason we're here today

is to insist you drop

such a ridiculous lawsuit.

Ridiculous?

For starters, it's riddled

with spelling mistakes, but

since I'm not your Spanish teacher,

we'll pay no mind.

On the other hand,

I did a background check

on your client, Mr. Sandoval.

What I found is quite alarming.

He lives in the service room

of an overcrowded building.

Well, lower rent costs.

And he has

a marijuana plant in his bedroom

You told her about the plant?

No, I didn't tell her anything, I swear.

Your client

could end up in jail, colleague.

Jail?

But Mariana is the one that has a minor

kidnapped at a stranger's house.

Oh, right. Because her mommy

had no money to pay for rent.

Did you tell him about my mom?

Not a word, no.

You graduated two years ago

and you're not practicing.

At least I have a job.

- I'm creative, I handle social media.

- Like mine.

Mm-hm. I was working on a maternity app

with you, I don't know if you remember.

Yes, you bailed on it.

Just as you bailed on me

when I was pregnant. Remember?

Yes, then you dated a chick.

A l*sbian!

What kind of example is that

for the baby? Huh?

Conrado, I am a l*sbian.

I'm sorry, ma'am.

That's not what I meant.

You're a sexist caveman.

And you're an uncaring mother.

f*ck you!

I guess I'll see you in court.

Conrado, when will you finish

the assignment you owe me?

Remember, this is your last chance

to improve your grade, colleague.

I'm almost done, ma'am.

Make yourselves at home.

What, dude?

I just have to do

a spellcheck, that's all.

Pablo can't find out,

but Laura said we can get full custody.

Are you sure that's what you want?

I think the girl needs her father.

Oh, what for, Mom?

So he can break her heart? No.

Sometimes it's better not to have a dad.

Come on

You would've liked Anuar

to have been there for you, right?

Why take that away from Regina?

You said she'd negotiate.

You said we had it in the bag.

f*cking idiot.

Well, these procedures are long.

But when Regis turns 18, she'll be able

to decide if she wants to see you or not.

When she's 18?

No way, dude.

Well, kids grow very fast.

And girls even faster.

Just follow my lead, okay?

What lead?

Hmm. Hello.

Ana.

I didn't think you would be back,

given how badly it went last time.

Ah

I assume this is your eldest?

Who, her? No, she's Mariana, my au pair.

And this is her daughter Regina.

Oh, she's beautiful.

I'm glad you brought her.

Too bad this place

- isn't really affordable for everyone.

- Hmm.

You'll love it.

Hey, I was just reading Harriet Lupkiss

She's a wonderful pedagogue.

She says we should start this

when they're two months old.

Oh, Christie, but Harriet Lupkiss'

theories are way too obsolete.

I get why you brought her up,

she's very mainstream, right?

But there are much better authors,

- way more advanced.

- Yes.

Mariana didn't know a lot about

early development at first,

but I've taught her quite a bit, right?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, my boss knows a lot

about early development.

I mean, I know a little.

I just read so much.

Hmm.

Tell Christie

about the authors I showed you.

Which is your favorite?

- There's lots.

- Yes. Mmm!

- Peter Locust, for instance.

- Mm-hm.

Essential for understanding

Betsy Nest.

But, truth is, the one I like the most

for this particular age is

- Walter Crenshaw.

- Yes, exactly.

HANS BREMEL SCHOOL - SCIENCE FAIR

And so, it's not as exact,

for the elements that define

the stability of the chemical

and atomic components are

CHEMICAL BONDS

Are

atoms with two charges,

one positive and one negative.

And they vibrate

They vibrate

and never stop vibrating.

And

What happened?

Nothing, I got nervous.

I also get nervous when I speak in public.

You know what I do?

You picture the audience naked?

How did you know?

You got that from a movie, Dad.

That doesn't mean it doesn't work.

Imagine the judges naked.

Ew.

They're old.

Well

imagine some hot girls.

Shall we?

Whoo!

This exercise works wonders,

kids learn the colors very fast.

Ana

Yes, I know, I read the color book.

No, it's not for them to learn the colors.

It is, Christie.

Or the parachute would have

only one color, not many.

- The book that I

- Eh

You have it at home so Valentina

can see it when she knows the colors.

Remember?

What are you doing?

Christie is right.

I don't care,

you made me look like a fool.

And you said I was your nanny.

- We agreed on that.

- Did we?

- Yes.

- When?

Oh

My baby!

My baby!

My advice didn't work.

- Did you do as I said?

- Yes.

But picturing

hot girls only distracted me.

Second place isn't bad.

There were two of us in my section.

You both did great. For me, it was a tie.

But I always win.

Like my mom.

It's good to lose sometimes, Ro.

I've never been more embarrassed.

It's your fault I got kicked out

of the only Funboree I could go to.

No, no. It's your fault

for living off appearances.

- Forget it, you don't get it.

- I don't.

I don't get why you care

what others think of you.

I just wanted Valentina to smile at me.

Don't beat yourself up.

Look

I won this at a speech contest

back in high school.

It's blank.

I know. It's a participation medal.

I sucked.

We can tell Mom you won first place.

It'll be our secret.

PABLO - PLEASE, MARIANA:(

If your mom catches us,

we'll remind her how much she lies.

Yes.

Dad, I had fun with you

at the science fair.

- Really?

- Yes.

You and Mom make a great team.

I like having the both of you.

Aah!

No.

Okay.

Pablo!

Mariana?

Why are you here?

I've been thinking and

despite what we said, I

Forgive me.

I'm sorry too.

Come in.

Look I know that

there's all kinds of families.

In mine, we were my mom,

my grandma and I, and

It was great, but

it still hurts me that I don't

have a relationship with my dad.

If you're willing, I don't want

to deny my daughter that right.

Hmm?

Look, look.

Go to Daddy, huh?

Hello, baby.

Hello, princess.

Hello.

Hi!

Hey, how are you?

Huh?

Of course I'm willing, Mariana.

This is what I want the most.

Okay, but you can't back down now, okay?

Oh, so cute.

I think you should both

sign an agreement so that

- You shut up, dude!

- Shut up, dude.

Princess, princess.

But one day I'll tell her

we smoked the marijuana plant together.

Yes, baby. Yes.

- Your mom was a stoner.

- Not true.

Yes, she made huge joints,

- like Snoop Dogg.

- Shh!

- Yes, yes.

- Ah!

Oh, she's so beautiful.

Laugh.

You like me, don't you?

Ana.

I want to apologize.

I wasn't fair to you at the Funboree.

All I wanted was to spend

quality time with Valentina.

I know.

You don't have to go

to a Funboree for that anyway.

No?

She hasn't smiled at me once.

Will you let me help you?

Oh, right, you're the expert.

Oh, no, I'm not.

Neither of us are experts

and we don't know everything.

But, look, maybe

if you stop worrying

about whether she laughs or not,

and just play with her,

have fun, try to enjoy it

Come on, try it.

Hello, darling.

Hi, darling.

Who's my baby girl?

Oh! She's laughing!

Did you see that?

She laughed.

You won, friend!

What was that play?

I got confused, friend,

I thought we had her.

Mm.

- Good game.

- Great game.

- We had her.

- Well, whatever.

When will we meet the baby?

That's what we came for,

not for you to win.

- Oh, yeah.

- Please.

- Yes.

- I'll go get her.

Yes!

- So exciting!

- So exciting, huh?

- Want some peanuts?

- Yes.

Oh, sure

Mariana?

Help me. Bring Regina.

What, am I playing nanny again?

Don't ask, just come.

Ugh.

Come on.

Oh.

Let's go.

- Look, girls, meet Valentina.

- Oh, wow!

Look!

She has your eyes, friend.

- Really?

- The same eyes.

And this is Mariana, her other mother.

And Regina, my other daughter.

- Nice to meet you.

- What? Her other mother? I don't get it.

It's not hard.

We're both the mothers of both the girls.

- Right?

- Oh.

Okay

Yeah.

Well, they're both gorgeous.

Divine.

Yes, baby girl.

I knew she was a l*sbian.

- Oh, friend.

- I knew since high school.

Your friends must be having a blast

gossiping about what happened.

Oh, I don't care. Let them talk.

I'm very proud of you, honey.

There's a lot of things

I need to change,

but for my own sake,

not for other people's sake.

And there's a lot

we have to change about our relationship.

That's why going to therapy

isn't such a bad idea.

Thank you.

SCIENCE BUILDING

Hello, Dad.

Mariana, what are you doing here?

I want to heal our relationship.

Right now?