02x05 - NICK

[bunniefuu]

[man whistling
12 Days of Christmas]

[deep sigh]

I love Christmas.

[resumes whistling]

MAN: Hello?

Dr. Avison?

-Yes?
-Oh, thank God, it's you.

I was hoping you could find it
in your heart

to take a new patient tonight?

This is my private home.

How did you get this address?

Do you not take walk-ins?

No. It's Christmas Eve.

I know.

It's a difficult night
for so many,

especially the lonely.

I just need someone to talk to.

I'm sorry, I can't.

Is that because
it's Christmas Eve,

or because you have
another patient?

Because I can assure you,
whatever is going on with

this other guy,
I've got it way worse.

Look, I-I'm trying to be
patient with you...

No, I'm trying to be
a patient with you, get it?

-Okay, good night.
-Santa! Wait.

Oh, my God, it's you.

I missed you so much.

Nobody believes like
they used to.

[phone unlocks]

Oh, oh, good.

You're calling Nick
to cancel, huh?

It's fine, he's a new patient.

No, you're an intruder.

I'm calling the police.

How did you know all that?

Okay, okay, okay, you got me.

I'm sorry, I... I lied,

but there's a very good
explanation, okay?

It's just the holidays.

They're so...

Wait, what is that?

What?

Something on your face.

What? Where?

-No, it's on the other side.
-It's right here.

[grunting]
[snapping]

Oh, that's a nice
holiday sweater.

I like those glasses, too.

[door knocking]

Hello?

MAN: Dr. Avison?

Yes?

It's me, Nick Green.

We spoke on the phone earlier

about an emergency
new patient appointment.

-Yes, yes.
-Of course, of course.

I'm so glad you're here.

I just need a moment.

I'm wrapping up
one last present.

Okay. Thank you so much
for seeing me tonight.

You're a lifesaver.

[eerie theme music]

To top it all off,
I'm totally f*cking broke.

I have nothing.

I have no friends.

I'm just so sad.

Yeah.

So sad all the time.

Well, Nick...

I'm really proud of you.

[sighs] Thanks.

I can't believe
you're still alive.

What?

I mean, were you not
listening to yourself?

Dead mom, divorce, money issues,

about to spend your first
Christmas Eve alone?

I've had patients k*ll
themselves for much less.

I mean, I gotta be honest,

I don't know what
to do with you, Nick.

I mean, I guess there's...

There's one thing we could try.

It's a little dangerous, though.

What?

Okay, Nick, scoot over.

Okay? It's okay.
It's okay.

It's okay. All right.

Nick, are you a believer?

In what?

You have not once
mentioned the big guy

in this entire conversation.

You mean like God?

No, the big guy.

Up north.

Way up north.

[whistling Joy to the World]

I can't believe
I'm going to do this,

but I'm working on
an experimental new therapy.

Very dangerous.

It's called Come to Santa.

-Um, I don't...
-It's just like Gremlins, okay?

Look, you're about my age, remember?

We saw Gremlins
as young boys, right?

And remember when Phoebe Cates,

she gives that
beautiful monologue,

her dad comes down the chimney

dressed as Santa Claus,
and he dies.

And it messed us up.

Because we stopped believing
in Santa way too young,

and we associate
that trauma with him,

and with our dads.

That horrific trauma.

I'm telling you,
you give me one night

and I can fix you, Nick.

-Oh...
-But I do need to film it.

-Um...
-I'm will waive your fee.

I'm going to pay you $1,000
for your time.

Look, man, this...

I'm pretty skeptical
about all this.

Oh, oh, you're skeptical?

Oh, Santa. Santa.

He's skeptical. He's skeptical.

You wanna know
why you're skeptical?

Because you don't believe
anymore.

You don't believe in anything.

That's why we have to go
all the way back,

all the way back to Santa.

Because if you can
believe in him, Nick,

you can believe in anything.

Even that you can
be happy again.

-Um...
-Come on, what're you gonna do?

You're gonna go home,
you're gonna slit

both of your wrists
and bleed out in the bathtub?

That's lose-lose for both of us.

Let's do it.

How you doing in there, buddy?

Oh!

Sweetheart, look at you.

How do you feel?

Honestly, uh,

I always wanted
Christmas jammies.

Yeah, me too.

My mom, she... my mom
worked all the time.

She didn't have any money.

We didn't have any money.

There was hardly any presents.

Yeah, that's what happens
when dads leave their sons when

they're seven years old
and they never come back.

I-I never told you
when my dad left.

How do you know that?

You know, Nick,

This is not your fault.

-What?
-It's not your fault.

-Yeah, I know...
-It's not your fault, Nick.

-I know...
-It's not your fault.

I never I thought it was.

A lot of other people
had it way worse.

-No!
-Jesus.

Sorry, I didn't mean
to frighten you,

but that is a hard no, Nick.

Okay.

Trauma is relative,
and this is your trauma.

Your daddy left you, baby.

He left you with nothing
to believe in,

not even Santa, okay?

Okay?

Okay.

I know. Okay.

Well, congratulations, Nicholas.

You just passed step one.

Merry Christmas.

Is this absolutely necessary?

Yes, it's absolutely necessary.

Come on in and close the door.

And...
[door closes]

Come sit on Santa's lap.

What happens
in Santa's workshop,

stays in Santa's workshop.

Come on.

-Come on, come on.
-Okay.

-There we go.
-All right, now,

tell Santa what you
want for Christmas.

Um, I...

I want to be happy.

-Nah, that doesn't work.
-That's not a thing.

Okay? I need
something specific.

What do you want?

You mean a toy car or something?

No, Nick, I don't mean a toy car

because you're a grown man.

I can feel your fully
descended testicles

on my leg right now.

Something specific.

What is at the root
of your trauma?

I-I don't know.

I don't know what's at
the root of my trauma.

Yes, you do, we've been
talking about this all night.

Come on.
It's your...

Your...

D.. da...

My dad?

Yes, Captain Obvious!

You want your dad to come back
on Christmas morning,

and Santa can help

bring him to you,
but you have to ask.

Listen, I appreciate what
you're trying to do here,

but I honestly... I don't
think this is for me...

Oh, for the love of Frosty.

All right, get the camera.
Come on.

I wasn't planning on doing this
until much later in the process

but you forced my hand,
you doubting Thomas.

You want proof Santa's real?

Come on. Come on.

You ready?

Yeah.

There it is.

Took this picture when
I was ten years old.

In a room not unlike this one,

except it was much darker.

Had my Polaroid camera hidden
under my pillow.

I heard the footsteps
coming down the hall,

the creak of the door.

Saw the white beard peeking in.

He said, "Shhh,

don't tell anyone."

And then I snapped the picture!

I know, I know.
It's a shock

when you see him in the flesh
for the first time.

I mean, I myself,
I can barely remember

anything from that night.

How do you know that
wasn't just some guy

in a Santa suit that
came into your room?

What are you talking about?

I mean, that could've
been anyone.

[scoffs] I don't think so.

No.

He brought presents,

and there was the celery
and the carrots.

Oh, and he left a note.

Yeah, the parents do all that.

No.

No, don't you project your
daddy trauma onto me?

What're you, what are
you trying to say here?

That it wasn't Santa
that came into my room,

but just some random guy?

And the reason I can't
remember it is because what?

Because he r*ped me?

-Oh...
-That's, that's insane.

Where'd you get a crazy idea
like that from?

Um. Look, man...

This has been super helpful,
but here, I...

No, no, no, no, no, no...

-I just...
-Don't turn this around on me.

Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh.

I think you got some
things you gotta process.

This is your trauma, not mine.

We're working on you tonight.

I am fine.

I am fi... I am fine!

[descending footsteps]

Okay.

Dr. A?

♪ Deck the Halls
with boughs of holly ♪

♪ Egg-a-egg-a-nog,
a-nog-nog-nog ♪

You're just in time
for caroling and egg-a-nog.

-Here, here...
-No, I... look.

Um. Thank you.
But, um,

I, I, I gotta go.

-No, no, no.
-Why do you need to go?

We're almost done
with the program.

-Come on, have some nog.
-No, no, maybe, um,

you mentioned earlier,
a thousand dollars.

I was thinking maybe
I could just take half.

Maybe...

Could, could we do that?

You want half of the money

because you've finished
half of the program?

Yeah.

You feel good about that?

I... I feel
pretty good about it.

So if you went
to the blood bank,

and you gave them half a bag
of blood, you'd ask

for half the...
that's not how it works.

You gotta give the full bag
of blood, Nick.

Come on, I think
you're just nervous.

Have some nog.
Let's finish this thing.

I don't like nog...

Well, that's part
of the problem.

You need to get in
the Christmas spirit.

But I'm lactose-intolerant.

Well, this is soy nog,
so it's okay.

-I just don't like to...
-Drink the nog, Nick!

Yes!

Okay. Down the hatch.

-[Nick sighs]
-Come on.

And then like...

Yeah, absolutely, absolutely.

Yes!

Now all we have left

is the grand finale, Nick.

-Grand finale?
-Yes.

Tomorrow morning when
Santa comes down that chimney

right there and we get final
proof that he's real.

When you finally
come to Santa...

-Tomorrow? No, man.
-I gotta get home.

What are you going
to do at home, Nick?

What are you, gonna watch
Looney Toons cartoons on a TV

in your sad trailer where you
put a g*n in your mouth

looking at pictures
of your dead ex-wife?

-I don't know what that is.
-Is that Gremlins?

No, that is Mel Gibson
in Lethal Weapon.

Gremlins is when the guy
falls down and breaks his neck.

-Come on, just stay...
-Look, man...

I don't want any more nog, man.

Look, I'm trying to
be nice, okay?

But you clearly have
issues with your dad, okay?

And I, I don't...

Stop saying my dad r*ped me.

That's not cool, especially
on Christmas Eve.

-Come on...
-I'm sorry, where's...

Where's my bag?

My bag?

-Your bag?
-Yeah.

I don't know.

Where'd you leave it?

I left it...

I left it down...

Oh.

Wait, are you okay, Nick?

I'm fine...

Wait a minute.

Did you have too much egg nog?

Wha...

Oh, no.

[snoring]

Twas the night before Christmas

and all through the house,

not a creature was stirring.

[breathing calms]

Good night, sweetheart.

[whispering]
Nick.

Nick!

-[moaning]
-Nick.

Wake up. Wake up.

It's Christmas.

It's Christmas!

And Nick, he came.
[Joy to the World playing]

Oh, he came,

and brought prezzies!

And the carrots and celery.

He ate it all.
Nick, Nick.

I filmed it. I got proof.

Come and see. Come and see.

And the best part is,

I don't think anybody got r*ped.

Okay, sit. Sit, sit.

Come on. Sit.

Here. Look.

Look.

Oop!

Sneaky little bugger.

[on tape] Okay.

Here we go.

Ooh, you're heavier.

[grunting]

You're little, but you're heavy.

Is this... is that's Santa?

-No, that's...
-that's... that's somebody else.

-Oh...
-Shh, shh, shh.

Wait, here's my favorite part.
Look, look, look, look.

Oh, what's that?

Oh, it's your prezzie!

Nick, it's your present!

Come on, don't you wanna
open your prezzie?

Come on.

Where am I?

Okay, all right.

Come on.

You need a little help.

A little help here.
Here we go.

Ooh, it's a big one.

Oh, sounds like
a good one, Nick.

It sounds like a good one.
Come on!

Open it. Come on.

Where's my bag?

Y... your bag?

Nick, who cares about your bag?

It's Christmas, and Santa came.

Come on! Okay.

Here we go, here we go.

Ooh!

Where is it?

It's really deep in there.

Okay. Okay.

Nick. Nick!

It's in there.
It's in there.

My bag?

Yes, it's your bag.

Go get it.

-D... Dad?
-Yes! Yes!



And this whole time, he's been
living two towns away.

And Santa brought him to you

on Christmas morning.

Nick, how do you feel?

-[head splatters]
-Oh, jeez!

Wait. No, no,
no, no, Nick, no!

No, don't leave, don't leave!

Nick! Wait!

You haven't forgiven him yet!

[singsongy]
Nick?

Nick?

Nick?

It's okay.

You didn't need to run away.

I'm not going to hurt you.

Oh, somebody taking a tubby?

Where are you?

Seriously.

Oh.

Okay.

Shh.

Don't tell anyone.

[floor creaks]

Ooh, come on, Nick.

[hangers clatter]
[screaming]

[loud thudding]

Nick?

What happened?

[laughing]
Oh, sweetheart.

You fell!

Huh.

Just like Gremlins.

[eerie theme music]