02x05 - To Your Health/Golf Brawl/Tom's Swan Song/King Spike the First and Last

[bunniefuu]

[theme music playing]

[shrieks]

[shrieks]

[thud]

[gasps]

Tom!

Look at yourself.

You're an even bigger mess
than the one you're making.

Well, not today.

We got a tip that the
city health inspector

is making a surprise
check of all the hotels.

Clean up your act this second,

and especially keep the hotel
free of any dirty rodents!

Or you can kiss your
comfy home here goodbye.

[gasps]

Welcome. I'm the manager here.

Let me just say
right off the bat

that I am obsessed with
keeping the hotel clean.

I clean it every
day, every hour...

I mean, uh, every five minutes.

Which reminds me, it's time
to disinfect the front desk.

Clean, clean,
clean, clean, clean.

Oh, this is not as
dirty as it seems.

Oh, a baby must have
dropped his bottle.

Oh! Not sure how
that got there.

Look at this cat. He's filthy!

Why, he's tracking in
trash from the street.

Disgusting.

You just made the
list, my furry friend.

That's strike one.

[jerry laughing]

[whistles]

[laughs]

[sneezing]

Sneezing. That seems
like a health hazard.

[continues sneezing]

Oh, my goodness!

Now this mangy cat has sneezed
all over the salad bar.

That's strike two, pal.

That cat is just visiting.

[screams]

Ants! Inside?

[screams]

A kid probably
broke his ant farm.

Well, the carriages do
go around the block.

[heavy footsteps]

The park zoo is nearby.

[pig grunts]

Okay, I got nothing.

Oh, that's it.

This place is done.

Tom, you are out of here.

[laughing]

We're doomed.

The health inspector is going

to completely shut
down the hotel.

[screams]

[whispers]

[whirring]

[exhales]

Ah, where am I? What happened?

There was a blackout
just as you entered

and you, um, fell on
your head in the dark.

How about you begin
the inspection,

if you feel like it?

Congratulations.

You passed the inspection
with flying colors.

[scatting]

Tom, you saved the hotel.

I'll get a reward for you.

- Tom!
- [screaming]

[scatting]

[squeaks]

[grunts]

[laughing]

[dings]

[siren wailing]

[ball shrieks]

[laughing]

[alarm blaring]

[yells]

[laughing]

[cheering]

[screams]

[thuds]

[screams]

[screams]

[camera shutter clicking]

[glass breaking]

[instrumental music playing]

[slurps]

[coughs]

[instrumental music
continues playing]

[coughing]

[slaps]

[instrumental music
continues playing]

[shrieks]

[blows raspberry]

[music intensifying]

[thuds]

[gasps]

[instrumental music
continues playing]

And so the high and mighty king

lived royally ever after.

The end.

[snoring]

Not bad considering
dogs can't read.

Boy, them kings sure
knew how to live.

First rate chow,

live entertainment.

Peasants waiting on
them hand and foot.

If anybody deserves to
relive them days, it's me.

[thuds]

[glass breaking]

- [clangs]
- [glass breaking]

[squeaks]

I am sick and tired of youse two

always making a
racket around here.

It's getting to be a
royal pain in the...

Royal?

That's it.

I hereby declare myself
the king of this castle.

From now on, youse two obey me
or it's off with your heads.

Hey, that felt good.

Now show your king some respect.

[shouting] Bow down!

That's more like it.

Now, a cape and a
crown seems in order.

[shouting] That's an order!

[loud thud]

[snaps fingers]

Not bad.

[stomach growling]

But the inner king is hungry.

What say you fix me a
snack fit for a monarch?

- [dishes clattering]
- [snaps fingers]

Now for some after
dinner entertainment.

Okay, let's see.

Ah! Jousting!

The sport of kings.

[amusing instrumental
music playing]

[intense music playing]

[thuds]

Must be off-season.

Here's a perfect way
to end the night.

A ride in a king's carriage.

[panting]

[tires squeaking]

Don't get any ideas, Gigi.

[yawns]

Me thinks it's time to
prepare a royal bed chamber.

[gasps]

That's the lobby
to youse two mugs.

[snoring]

[sobbing loudly]

- Quiet!
- [screams]

What's all the ruckus?

[groans]

Oh, dogface thinks
he's a king, huh?

Well, I know how
to get to a king.

I've seen the Shakespeare show,

Hamlet in the park once.

You got to go for the psyche.

Here's what we do.

Costume.

Makeup.

Atmosphere.

On with the show!

Spike! Youse must listen to me.

Spike!

That's King Spike
to you, peasant.

No, Spike.

I am the ghost of
your father, King Rex.

And I'm here to tell you

being a king ain't all
it's cracked up to be.

Go back to being normal,

and leave Tom and Jerry alone.

And that handsome
alley cat Butch, too.

Nuts to that.

They're always making a
racket, causing trouble.

No, son. They are
your fellow creatures.

Live and let live,

and you will be truly happy.

Don't end up like your dad.

[exclaiming]

Huh?

Hey, you're not my pop.

He's alive and
well in Tampa Bay.

Uh... It was all a dream.

Go back to sleep.

No applause, please.

Exit stage left.

Youse guys are really
going to get it now.

[objects clattering]

[barking]

Oh, son.

I was just helping my
pals here exercise.

Let's all go back to sleep

and forget this
king business, huh?

[both] Phew!

And they all live
happily ever after.

Especially me.

[chomping]

[theme music playing]