05x04 - Stag Party

[bunniefuu]

[steam hissing]

[woman] How often do you get treatments?

[Pørni] Not very... I mean, never, really.

-I've received some as gifts, though.
-[woman] Yeah.

That's what I thought.
You should have come here much sooner.

Why do you say that?
Is it a lost cause, then, my face?

No, uh... but you should see your skin

as someone who needs
masses of attention and care.

And without that, it just...
wastes and festers from the inside.

Like a small child.

-Isn't that rather a weird way to put it?
-[phone chimes]

Let's see.
We'll have to set up a plan for you.

GOOD LUCK AT
THE CHILD WELFARE EMERGENCY UNIT!

I'M HERE IF YOU NEED A DEBRIEF

So you can come
once a week or every other week.

THANK YOU!

Until we get back the balance
in your skin.

And you can also think about
what I mentioned earlier...

Because Bettina's the expert at all that,

and no one can see
that you've done anything to your face.

Have you done it? Do you get Botox?

You shouldn't ask someone...
something that personal, but yeah, I do.

But why? How old are you?
Twenty-three or something?

I'm twenty-seven,
but, uh... yeah. We all do it.

It's not some kind of taboo.
It's like going to the hairdresser's.

It's a little taboo,
if you tell me not to ask about it.

I think it's... really good that you...
aren't scared of looking older.

But... do you know who gets Botox
who you would never think gets Botox?

No.

[whispering indistinctly]

-You're joking.
-No.

Bettina does the treatments here.

So that's something to think about.

PERNILLE

[theme music plays, fades]

-What? Does she get Botox?
-Yeah.

I thought her face was
naturally smooth as a baby's backside.

[Pørni] So did I, but no.

-And that does make you consider doing it.
-Yeah, yeah.

I want my face to look like a baby's
backside, not just the backside bit.

Plus, she even said that...
my face was a lost cause.

Yeah, but faces
in general are lost causes.

The day I feel I need it,
I'll be straight there.

What are you doing?

Why would you say such a thing
to your ugly friend,

when you're so pretty?

And when I say "ugly friend",
I don't mean me, I mean Pernille.

[all chuckle]

Oh um, Michaela was telling me

that Sigrid has made it in
to the national team for football.

How are you not showing off about it?

No, she hasn't.

Jesus. She's gone to some training camps,
and she might get into Girls 16,

but no, that is not the national team.

I just have mediocre offspring
without any special talent at all.

Which is very strange, when you think
that my mind is quite sharp.

But I blame Lars
'cause he only just passed the bar exam.

Tuva, Lars worries me lately.

-Lars worries you? Why?
-Well, I...

Uh, isn't it strange how you worry
about everyone else's men,

when you can't even see a good man
who's standing three centimetres

in front of you and offering himself up
to you on a plate?

-[gentle music playing]
-Hmm?

[Tuva] Oh, do you have any sweets
for the meeting,

or shall we buy cheese puffs?

-[Pørni] We'll have cheese puffs.
-[Tuva] Cheese puffs!

-Oh my God, these T-shirts are so cool.
-Oh, they are! Aren't they?

-Look at that!
-Oh!

We're wearing these on the stag party?

-[Leo] They're cool.
-I know!

Lukas has started working
in a T-shirt shop, so I get them cheap.

[Hanna] I haven't seen Lukas for ages.
Is he okay?

Yeah. He's gonna be a big brother too.
Just like me.

Who wants some pasta now?

So, I'm doing the agenda here,

and so far,
we've come up with a smash room,

and handing out condoms around town.

How come your generation
is so sex-obsessed?

I don't want to hand out condoms in town.

Granddad can do that on his own,
and we'll just watch him.

-Tell us about the smash room, then.
-And what exactly is a smash room?

There are cars you can smash,
porcelain, glass, computers...

I want to smash a car!

I think that costs a lot, though.

Yeah, but I'd pay 20,000
for the chance to smash up a car. Really.

Uh, before we decide what we're doing,
can we eat something?

I've got my first night shift tonight,
so I need to have a full stomach.

Uh, so Mum, can you try to be quiet
when you get back home?

I've got the world's longest lecture
in the morning on viruses and bacteria.

All right.
Do you know where your dad is now?

Did she say anything
to you in the car, then?

Yeah, but when I told her
I couldn't talk to her

in any way that was like an interview...

Well, then she went quiet.

But witness observations
corroborate what she's saying.

That it was all just an accident. So, erm...

She wants us to give her a phone
so she can ring one of her friends.

-[Linda] I'll go and talk to the mother.
-[Elin] Yeah.

-[phone rings]
-Oh, can you get that, Pernille?

There was a f*ck-up, so it's ringing
on both phones, but it's the same caller.

They're coming out tomorrow to fix it.

The system's down again. I can save it,
but I can't send it for authorisation.

Uh, register it manually
so we keep a record.

Hi, you've reached
Child Emergency Welfare. This is Pernille.

[woman] Can you come get my baby?

Hi, Hege. That is your name, right?

I have a baby here that
you need to come and get.

He doesn't fit in with us.

Hege, could you tell me some more, please?

Is it that you've had a baby
and you've taken them home?

He doesn't fit in here.

-Okay. Hege, I...
-[call disconnects]

Hege?

Uh, that was a mother

with a newborn
who wants to give away her baby.

[Elin] I'll come with you.

Can you check the radios
in case we have to push the red button?

[Pørni] Yeah. Okay. Yeah.
But then we'll call the hospital.

Okay. Great.

f*ck. I got an ID on the father,
and I know his son.

It's Lukas, who's a friend of my nephew.

They play in the same band.
He's come to our house, and...

sh*t, he must still live at home, as well.

-Hm. Do you know the father well?
-I mean, I've met the dad.

And he's an author,
so the same as the dad of my two.

Are we too close, do you think?

Yeah, we can ask them, don't you think?
It's normally okay.

-Let's see... 12?
-It's just on this side.

There. I've taken Leo here before.

[gentle music playing]

So sweet.

He's out for the count.

Oh, just so you know,
it wasn't my idea to ring you.

I think if Hege gets a good night's sleep,
she'll be better and we'll handle this.

And I just wanted to say to you that
whatever you say here is private.

So the fact that we met each other before...

Don't worry.
No one will know that I was here.

Leo won't know. No one will.
But if you find it hard, just let me know.

No, no, not at all. It's no problem.

And it's lovely
for Lukas that Leo is back in town.

Did you have a little new baby party?
The decorations are nice.

Yeah, well, Hege's family
were going to... supposed to come,

and my kids, and...

We got the message from the hospital,
and we had to cancel everything.

Harald, Lukas's brother,

went home to his partner,
and this guy here lives at home.

For the next year. [chuckles]

He's got a job at a shop now.

Uh, what message did you
get from the hospital?

The... uh, chromosome disorder.

So they told you that today?

Mm. Yeah, today.
We're going back tomorrow just to, um...

-Hmm.
-Where's Hege now?

Asleep.

This is quite a lot to process.
Have you talked about what this all means?

We had an agreement that if...

if we were to have a baby,
it would be her... I know it sounds harsh,

but she'd be responsible, 100%.

And it had to be that way. I...
I'm writing, and... I have two boys already.

I left the toddler phase behind me.

I know it's tough to get that message,

and I know
I don't have any part in this, but...

we did agree that.

But although you have this agreement...

have you got any thoughts
or feelings on this?

Yes, of course.
It made me think a lot, but...

[baby fussing]

He's woken up.

Do you want to... pick him up?

I'd rather keep to the agreement we had.

We agreed on all the conditions, you see.

I'll take him, then.

[gently] Oh. Hi. Yes.

And do you think I could speak to Hege?

[man] Yeah. All right, then.

There. Are you hungry?

Hey.

Hege.

Hege.

Talk to this lady here.
She's come to help us.

Give my regards to Finn.
It's a while since I've seen him.

Hi, Hege. My name is Pernille.

We talked on the phone earlier.

And you've had a very tough day,
so I hear.

[baby crying]

Do you hear him crying?

Do you want to go and see if he's okay?

Just take him.

He can't stay here.

[baby continues crying]

[sombre music playing]

[crying intensifies]

Hey. What happens to him now?

They've just lost it,
but... I don't care about his chromosomes.

We'll take him back to the hospital now,
just for the night.

But could you call a friend or someone,
so you can talk about all this?

And you can visit him
in the hospital tomorrow, if you want.

Hasse.

He's got a name. He's called Hasse.

Hasse's lovely.

I'd say that you are the world's
best big brother already, Lukas.

But now Hasse needs you to get some rest
and maybe sleep a little, all right?

And you can visit him tomorrow. Okay?

[quietly] Yeah.

[phone beeps]

[Sigrid] Hi. It's nothing urgent.
I know you're at work.

I just had to tell someone
before I go to bed.

They called from the NFF.
I'm going to the Girls 16 training camp!

Don't tell Granddad.
I want to tell him myself.

I have to go now. Good night. Love you.

MY LITTLE CINNAMON BUN, HOW AMAZING!

GRANDPA WILL FLIP OUT.
SOOO PROUD. TALK TO YOU TOMORROW.

[siren wailing]

Yeah, well don't worry about it.

Hey. Mr. Big Shot defence lawyer.
So this is what's keeping you busy, is it?

Hi there.

Pørni!

Uh, hey. Hang on!

Tuva said that you're working
on the emergency lines.

-Is it going well?
-Is it going well? Are you an idiot?

You try to send Tuva away for weeks
so you can carry on behind her back.

And f*cking hell, I saw the two of you
outside of your house the other day.

You're an arsehole, Lars.
And how old is she?

-Twenty-five?
-You serious?

Milla's three years older
than my eldest son, Pernille.

God! How could you think that?
You think I'm that sleazy?

She was being harassed
by a witness that we've helped her report.

Oh yeah?

What you saw, that was Milla coming over
with wine for me,

because we had finished our witness work.

Oh, my God.
What...? How can you think that of me?

Hi, sweetie!

-Hi.
-Hi. Have you come from work?

Yeah.

[Tuva] Yeah, we've had
a slightly dramatic evening ourselves.

-But I guess you've heard about it.
-Yeah.

Uh...

Sorry. I've had a long shift,
so I think I just have to go home

and... sleep it all off.

-[Tuva] All right.
-But we'll talk soon, okay?

Yeah. Oh, and I've booked that smash room.

[Pørni] That's great.
We'll talk about that later.

-[Tuva] Okay. Sleep well!
-[Pørni] Bye-bye!

[gentle music playing]

[Hanna] No, no, so, the main difference
is that viruses are, uh,

non-living collections of molecules
that need a host to survive.

-[Pørni] Peter, hi!
-Hey. Morning, Pørni.

-Hey. Sorry, did we wake you up?
-No. No problem.

Hanna mentioned
you've started working nights.

Yeah, but I had to get up anyway.

I didn't know you were coming.

Peter came for a surprise visit.

Oh, that's so sweet. Thank you.

Leo?

Leo?

[Leo] Mm-hmm?

Um, I just wondered
if you've spoken to Lukas recently?

Lukas? No, not since I collected
those T-shirts for Granddad's stag do.

Why's that?

Oh, I only wondered about,
um... I was just wondering.

-Erm, is that your attempt at small talk?
-Sorry.

I won't bother you.
I see that you're busy with beats.

[chuckles] It sounds weird
to hear you say "beats".

-[both laugh]
-Sorry.

Hanna, you did go
to your class today, even with...?

[Hanna] Yes.

-Peter waited for me outside the faculty.
-[Pørni] Oh, well, that is very romantic.

Sigrid got into that, uh... junior team.

Don't tell Granddad
'cause she wanted to tell him herself, so...

Are you staying long, Peter?
Can you come to Granddad's hen party?

Stag party, Mom. Hen is for the bride.

-Only mostly.
-No, unfortunately not. I've got to work.

Um, and I'm afraid it's gonna be
the same for the wedding.

But I promise I will make your trip
to Liverpool amazing, though.

If your uncle can get us into Anfield,
everything is forgiven.

[both chuckle]

Don't forget to study,
even though you have a visitor.

Yeah, just stop nagging.

And so, I was just telling Peter

the difference
between viruses and bacterium

and the benefits of vaccination.

Okay. Try to ask some questions too,
every so often.

[busy chatter]

-Hi. I'm sorry.
-Hi.

-I'm not used to staggered working hours.
-Don't worry.

No, no, no. No worries.

Um... I was just discussing with Madjid
that we'll team him up with Eron

on the days when you're gone
for half the day

because of the emergency unit.

So he won't have
too many people to respond to.

How was it yesterday?

Oh, they are so... fantastic.
And there's so much to do.

And I like the tempo.

So if I can work 80% here,
I would love that.

Yeah. So we have a new placement
that came in this morning,

that we need to follow up.

And it looks like
it's that case you worked on.

The mum and child
should go to the Aline Centre,

and the father
needs counselling in parallel

'cause he wants
nothing to do with the child.

Give me some time
so I can see what I can figure out.

Oh and also, thanks.

You must thank your father
for the wedding invitation.

I wasn't expecting to get one.

We were just talking about the dress code.

I'm going for a sleek
but cool black suit, I think.

[Madjid] I think I'll wear
my national costume.

I didn't know
that my dad invited you to it. Sorry.

It was lovely to get it.

And the invitation said on it,
"Everyone's invited."

So I imagine that's why he invited
his daughter's colleagues.

Or half of his friends have kicked
the bucket,

so he has to fill it up
with my friends instead.

Could be.

[group laughs]

But you should get going
over to the family.

That other case, I'll phone around

and arrange something
with the interpreting service.

Do you...

Um... you must tell me
if you need your hours here decreased.

I know that those night shifts
can be really strenuous.

-I will. Thanks.
-Okay?

[gentle music playing]

Can't you just work things out?

Meaning?

People should stop trying
to deny their feelings.

It's awkward for me,
and you're being stupid.

Get a room or whatever.

You are just so wrong about that.

And I was just telling everyone
your social skills were getting so good,

but I'll have to phone around
and explain I was mistaken.

You know that you are such
an idiot sometimes, it's shocking.

So, what do you think about...

I don't know if there's procedures,
but is it...

Is it absolutely necessary for me to stay?

'Cause I'm in the middle of a book
right now.

It won't write itself.

It's... a children's book,
but... I need to have focus. Full focus.

Ole-Jørgen?

I think you have to stop
and try to think a little more

that Hege is going to need more help
than you expected.

Receiving news like that when
you've had a child is a massive upheaval.

Yeah.

Yeah, I know. You're right.

But I feel I'm unable to...

It can take a while for things
to sink in for me.

That's what the couples' therapist
says, anyway.

It's really good for Hege
that you'll also be at Aline.

-At least for tonight. They are brilliant.
-Yeah.

-Okay.
-She needs support.

Right. Yeah. Yeah.
I was speaking without thinking, so...

I'll be there for her.
Of course I will. Yeah.

[Pørni] Hi, Lukas. How are you doing?

They took down all the balloons.

That's so f*cked up.

Hege got admitted to a really good place
where you can visit Hasse.

Did you talk
with one of your pals yesterday?

Uh... no, it was late, and I had to work...

All right.

-Hi.
-Okay. Right, then, kiddo. See you.

You can just chuck out those rubbish bags.

I'll call you tonight. Okay?

It will be fine. All right? Hmm?

Madjid?

[Madjid] Yeah.

-Yep.
-Could you drive them both to Aline?

And I'll stay here?

-Okay. But shouldn't there be two of us?
-Yeah, but...

-Yeah, okay. I'll call you later.
-All right.

[vomiting, spitting]

-[toilet flushing]
-[knocking at door]

Lukas?

I don't think you should be alone now.
Should I call someone?

[sombre music playing]

[light music playing]

-Hi!
-Hi!

Didn't we say eight?

-Am I late?
-No, we... we arrived a while ago.

[chuckles] Oh, but I'd have come earlier
if you'd told me.

We, um, arranged to meet before
to talk about you.

Okay.

I heard about your little meltdown
with Lars last night.

Yeah. I'm sorry.

That... was terrible of me.

I just... I misunderstood,
and I got worried about you and Lars.

Yeah, but it's just, um...

Well, that's kind of
what we want to talk to you about, really.

We think that you should stop worrying
about us like that.

It's not just the thing with Lars,
you know.

-It's... You have a history with this.
-Mm-hmm.

[Tuva] There are nice men out there
who are reliable,

but you just brush them aside.

Kenneth, Jon...

He was rather dull, wasn't he?
But he's a decent man. Bjørnar.

Bjørnar and I have a clear relationship.

We're good friends now,
and he's my boss as well,

and it's so nice
to have him back in my life.

That's our point.

-Yeah, but there's nothing between us.
-Are you sure about that?

He moved to Trondheim when the train
was still waiting for him at the station.

No, you told him that the train
had left the station. You did say that.

Yeah, but, I... I did say that,
but I didn't mean it like that at all.

He never even tried to fight for me.

[Astrid] He's gone to therapy.
He's a new man. You said it yourself.

-He moved to Trondheim.
-[Astrid] Because of the kids.

A man who tries to put his kids first.

When you think about it,
that's a very good thing.

How often do you meet a guy like Bjørnar?

Or how often do you meet a guy
who's as good a match for you as he is?

-That's what we want to say.
-Yeah.

Someone you can be yourself with,

who's there when you need him,
who you actually like.

Isn't that worth something?

When you say it like that,
it does sound obvious.

[Tuva] You know what?
You just need to trust people.

You have to learn to trust
that some people,

a few, I know...
uh... aren't actually bad, are they?

You have to be able
to see gold when you find it.

Yeah, but what should I do
with that, then? It's...

-Another glass, then?
-Yes.

Okay. Let's see.

Who do you want to call
the most when you need to talk?

I call Anne, in general.

Yeah. I know. But that wasn't my question.

Who do you want to call the most?

Bjørnar Berg Hansen. f*ck, girls.

Oh, that's sh*t.
I think you're right, there.

Lars isn't angry with you,
just so you know.

And we just thought
this was a great opportunity to...

to address a few things
that we've talked about.

-You've already talked about it?
-[Tuva] Haven't we!

We're knackered.

[all exclaiming joyfully]

[indistinct, excited chatter]

[laughter and chattering]

[overlapping chatter]

[laughter]

Now everyone!

Are you ready
for the next part of the programme?

I really need to get
a bit of aggression out

after seeing an elderly man handing out
condoms in the middle of town.

But first, an announcement
from our dear Sigrid Øye Middelthon

to Granddad, AKA Ole Johan, AKA Baldwin!

[all cheer and applaud]

Yeah. I just wanted to say to you,

thanks for encouraging me
to go from outfield to keeper.

-You're the best granddad in the world.
-[all] Aww.

And I thought now's
the perfect opportunity to tell you

that the Girls 16 national team
has accepted me

as their number two keeper.

[cheers and applause]

Oh! Is this real? Are you sure?

-It's all true!
-Oh!

That's fantastic!

[laughs heartily]

-Well done!
-[cheering]

Did you know about that?

Yeah, but Sigrid wanted
to tell you herself, so...

Mister bus driver,
take us to the smash room!

[all chanting] Smash room! Smash room!
Smash room! Smash room! Smash room!

[chanting speeds up] Smash room!
Smash room! Smash room! Smash room!

Smash room! Smash room!

[all exclaiming excitedly]

[heavy drum music builds slowly]

[shouting]

[grunting]

[rapid drum beat playing]

k*ll it! k*ll it! Go!

-[crashing]
-[grunting]

La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!

[exclaims, whooping wildly]

[cheering and laughing]

[all exclaiming]

[dance music ends]

[line rings]

-[Bjørnar] Hello!
-Hi.

-Hi.
-Sorry to ring you so late.

No, don't worry about it.

I've always got time
for a performance review.

But, uh, shouldn't you be
at a stag party right now?

Yeah, I was there, but the bridegroom
is over 100,

so he only held out till half ten.

[both chuckle]

-I, uh, was thinking about you recently.
-Yeah, me too.

I don't mean think about myself,
I mean, thinking about you.

I talked to Åse, actually, earlier today.
She's my therapist.

Yeah, I'm still doing that.
It's hardcore therapy on a weekly basis.

-And uh...
-[chuckles]

She says I spend
an unusual amount of energy

on talking about someone I just work with.

I mean, that's putting it bluntly,
of course. We're friends too.

Er, yeah.

But I feel that my talks
with her have made me realise

just how guilty I feel
for how I acted with you.

I mean, when we met,
you were in a very vulnerable situation.

You were grieving.
Uh... and I, uh, was just a total idiot.

-[chuckles] Um...
-No, but don't worry about it.

-It's fine, honestly...
-Yes, but... Yes, but I was.

So I think about that a lot.
And I talk about it a lot.

I'm going to family therapy too
with Mai-Lis.

Oh yeah?

We've had some problems
with one of the twins.

So that's helpful.

-Uh...
-Mm-hmm.

I uh... was thinking about
the wedding seating plan.

-And I wondered if you and I...
-Yes, the wedding. Uh...

Would it be rude of me to ask
if I could bring Mai-Lis to the wedding?

I mean... It's just,
she's feeling a bit down

because of all these problems we've had.

-And um...
-Yeah, absolutely. Bring her.

-That'll be okay. Definitely.
-Really? Are you sure?

-Yep.
-Yeah?

-Yeah, yeah. Everyone's invited, yeah.
-All right, then.

-[both chuckle]
-That's great, then.

Uh... Let's see...
Why did I call you? No, you called me.

[both chuckle]

Yeah, but I... only wanted a bit of a chat.

So, um... It's a bit late, isn't it?
So... I'll see you at the office?

Yeah.

-Absolutely. -You will.
-Yeah.

-Yeah. Thanks.
-Okay. See you then.

-Yeah, good night.
-All right.

Bye.

[exhales deeply]

[sombre music playing]