02x15 - It's Not About the Lactose

[bunniefuu]

Previously, on
"Below Deck Down Under"...

I’m thinking about bringing
in an a lead deckhand.

Someone with experience.

Luka.

- Hello, darling!
- Hello. Oh my God.

During this charter, we’ve got
a lot to prove on the deck side.

He’s going to take lead,
go to him if I’m not there.

Coming in so late in the season,

I really want to jump
in and prove myself.

Joao seems like a
really strong leader.

I want to be that support
to take whatever

weight I can off his shoulders.

It’s so good having someone
with some experience mate,

I can’t even tell you.

I bet.

For next charter, I would
love to have you on service.

You seem like you’re
a little bit tipsy.

I took some of
the pina colada.

This is a verbal warning, okay?

Yeah.

You slip up again, finished.

- Okay.
- Done.

I will not slip up again.

Good on ya. Subject closed.

- Enjoy your night.
- Thank you.

How are you feeling?

I really enjoy what
Joao and I have.

I love the banter.

I want to do something
special for Jaimee

and ask her to be my girlfriend.

- I can hear you.
- Oh,.

Even though I’ve only
known Jaimee a short time,

we’ve had an
immediate connection.

I made you this.

You want me to tick the box?

Like, you’re 30... years old.

Oh my God.

To meet someone that fast
and have

that type of connection and
bond is very rare for me.

And I have something
very important to ask you.

- You’ll need this.
- What?

- You’ll need that.
- A pen?

You’ll need this, too.

I made you this.

"Jaimee, I remember the first
day I met you in the pantry.

"I was blown away.

"I thought, how did
we get so lucky?

"And where did we find
this super stew?

"I think you are the most
beautiful girl in the world.

So please check a box for me."

I haven’t asked this question

since probably elementary
school on the playground.

You want me to tick the box?

I’m actually not a fan
of the tick the box.

That’s like for the DMV
or COVID symptoms.

I wasn’t planning on
ticking yes or no to,

"Do you want to
be my girlfriend?"

What if I tick no?

I’ll probably just pack my bags.

He said five o’clock.
It’s already been 15 minutes.

If she hasn’t ticked
the box by now...

If she hasn’t ticked the box
by now.

Where’s the champagne then?

It’s in the upper pantry.

What’s your decision?

Can I just say yes?

Do whatever you want.

So that was a yes.

Yeah, it’s a yes.

It’s a yes.
Wow.

I really didn’t think I’d
be coming onto this boat

and finding a boyfriend,
that’s for sure.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

Cheers to a new relationship
and new adventures.

Uh-huh.

Okay, we should just goes
here on the steps.

Yeah, I thought I was
going to get fired.

Is there something
specific that you did?

Yeah, I drank the piña colada.

I’m sorry, so we’re not
allowed to drink now?

No. Nope.

- Oh, me.
- Yeah.

Honestly, I feel like
a... ing idiot.

But we all need
to up sometimes.

Jesus Christ, the amount
of... ing stuff

- in this place is unreal.
- Yeah, that’s true.

I actually would
put this down to Aesha.

Maybe she should get fired

because the piña colada
on this boat’s too good.

- Yeah.
- Oh, you look amazing.

Do you think it’s
too booby-ish though?

Nah, you’ll be alright.
Just don’t dance too hard.

Oh, imagine, ooh!

None of this.

Oh!

What’s the scoop with Joao?

I feel like you guys
just hit it off so much.

- Do you like him?
- I do.

What’s happening, bro?

How are you, bro?

- You do.
- I know that I can’t...

Because of the whole past
relationship situation.

Yeah, and Aesha had
this huge go at me.

She was basically,
I don’t trust him.

He’s two people.

I think people
can change.

Joao that I’ve seen,
I just love.

I know.

I think I’m just at the stage
now where I’m just like,

I’m willing to give it
a bit of a chance,

but me,
don’t embarrass me.

- Keep my heart safe.
- We close that off.

Open the legs.
Close my heart.

I do that, too.

Glad you’re here, babe.

I’ve been like really holding
in a piss this whole time.

Oh, go pee.

- Hola, Chiquita.
- Hi.

- Thank you.
- What’s happening?

You look amazing.

Yeah.
You look beautiful.

I shaved like fully
like a slippery dolphin,

so I’m ready to get into a very
small bikini tonight as well.

Yeah, but it’s so good.

What?

Oh, Culver’s packing
up his date.

Yay or nay?

We got a yay.

- Yeah!
- We got a yay.

Nice.

- Can I read it?
- Yeah.

- I hear.
- Jaimee.

"How did we get so lucky

and where did we find
the super stew?"

You ticked yes!
Are you excited?

- Yeah!
- Oh, my God.

You’ve got a boyfriend!

This is so cute.

Oh, my God.
I just love this.

This is beautiful.

I mean, yes, it’s quite soon,
but it’s beautiful.

What’s going on?

You seem like in shock.

- Or not happy or what?
- Oh, I’m so happy.

- I think she’s shocked.
- Yeah, I’m in shock.

Where’s Culver, I’m going
to congratulate him.

Oh, my God.
Good grief.

I just need to, like,
drink this.

Mm-hmm.

And I also need to drink...

- Culver!
- Yes?

- Culver!
- Yes, yes?

Yay!

- All right, let’s go!
- Let’s go.

All right, girl’s van!

No prob.

We’re gonna get to know
Luka tonight

When we get to the dinner table,

we should all have one
question to ask him.

I love it.

Budgies
when we get home.

Obviously.

No, you can’t.

- Ladies, welcome to dinner.
- Thank you.

- You ready for dinner?
- Yeah.

Miss Chief.

All right, guys, so this evening
we’ll just be running

a selection of chef’s favorites
as well as our signature dishes.

We do have a
coconut chili margarita.

Oh, yes.

- Yes.
- Yeah!

Thank you!

Obviously, Luka is new

so why don’t
we go around the table

and ask him a question
about him to get to know him.

- Oh, yeah!
- Icebreaker.

Way to put me on
the spot, darling.

Woo!

- That’s so good.
- It’s so good, isn’t it?

I have a question for Luka.

Do you wax, shave, or
keep it natural down?

- Au natural.
- I’m trimmed up, baby.

Oh!

My turn?

- Are you single?
- Yeah, baby.

I want to now what
is the best thing

that’s ever
happened in your life?

I think meeting you guys.

- For sure.
- Good answer.

So to start with just
got a few grazing boards.

Oh. Thank you.

- Dude, this sauce is like...
- Amazing?

- Amazing.
- Wow.

Oh my God!

Yay!

It’s insane!

Oh!

You know, mate?

- We should sit in this...
- All night!

I’ve been wanting to
sit with you guys.

Finally, you made it!

Come on, come on,
let me up in here.

Give Culver a bit of space.

Come on get in there, right?

Hey, he doesn’t need much.
Just give him a little.

Joao is like, so...

To be completely honest
with you

I see you guys
together so much.

I think holy
they have so much chemistry.

And I think they
get along so well.

Starting the night off...

You have to understand I’ve
known him for like three years.

This is like such
a big risk for me.

For the past two weeks like
you guys have been cuddling.

He’s been flirting
with you so much.

I think you should.

Good night, guys.

Here’s to a bloody good
...ing charter, boys.

Ladies, cheers.

What?

Hey?

What?

Hey?

Oh!

Holy sh... .

I’m here all night.
Thank you.

Um...

Why are you hiding, bro?
It’s your bill.

What is the bill?
What is it?

Okay, well,
hold on one second.

Let me go figure it out.

- What is that?
- 317.17

Look at the end
of every crew night dinner

someone pays the bill.

I’ll get this
because I just got $2,000.

Tsarina’s done it.
Joao’s done it.

I’ve done it.
Hell, now Jaimee’s done it.

Everyone’s paid the bill
except Culver

Who has extra charter tips?

No, I paid for the first one.
I paid for the first one.

So what’s the plan?

- Back to the jacuzzi.
- Jacuzzi.

All good?

Ladies and gentlemen.

To the boat.

Get in the... ing van, mate.

I’m pretty sure sh... just
hit the fan in there.

Is this the man
who paid the bill?

- She’s not pissed.
- Okay, perfect.

Harry has trouble reading women.

...ing smack.
Mate, mate.

What’s up with you
and Joao tonight?

- What was that about?
- Yes, tell us.

Do you think I’m an idiot?

Yes, but that’s fine.
We’ve all been an idiot.

We’re home, you idiots.

For ’s sakes.
Stop it. Stop it.

Budgie smugglers in
the boys cabin, let’s go.

That’s my cue.

- Yes.
- You sure?

Yes.

These ones the captain wore.
I feel honored.

- Harry?
- Harry?

- Yeah.
- Right now.

Where are the mullets?

They’re right here.

Hurry up.

- Joao.
- Hurry, I only got three.

Let’s go.
Mullet party.

One second.

- Budgies here.
- Where’s my budgies here?

- Joao needs one.
- There’s only three.

- I’ll take that.
- Can we go up to the hot tub?

We’re taking the chicken
crimpies up with us.

I know what it is.

You know, I’m going to be
honest with you.

Captain filled that up a
little bit more than you did.

- For ’s sake.
- What?

I actually don’t know if I want
to make it a thing anymore.

Oh my God.

What the?
Are you serious?

I’m your girlfriend now

and you’re having a
mullet party in the hot tub.

Why don’t you bring
me that card back

and I’m just going to check no.

Just trying to...

Are you going to go up
to the hot tub first?

- For a little bit?
- Yeah.

You know how it goes, Aesh.

I want to...

Okay, okay.
Come on now.

Is this a budgie smuggler
mullet party or what?

Yeah!

Woo!

Who else is coming in?

Well, Aesha’s gone to bed
because she always goes to bed.

Where’s Jaimee?
Where’s your girlfriend?

I think she’s coming up.

She’s pissed with you, bro.

Get out.

Are you gonna go find her?

- Go on.
- Go find Jaimee.

I just went to find you
at the hot tub.

I just was going
to find you.

I know that he’s
a people pleaser

and he’s just going and
having fun after a night out.

So I can’t be that mad at him.

Cool, five, huh?

Solid.

I don’t know who’s in charge
of turning this off

but I don’t want to be
a part of it.

Need to go to bed.

Can we turn the lights off?

What a gorgeous day.

Mm-hmm.

Okay.

Coming up...

Oh, hey boys!

Can we get them to
serve us drinks in speedos?

Yes!

They’re just looking at you
with these sparkly eyes.

They’re hungry.

Good morning!

Oh, my vag*na
is quite sore, hey?

Oh.

How was the evening?

Tell me.

Oh, my God.

- He’s circumcised..
- Oh, is he?

Shalom.

There was no holding
back last night.

Oh, my God.

I really could have happily
gone my whole life

not knowing any details
about Joao’s p*nis.

- I mean, I think it was a...
- Good morning.

Should we tell them
about the baby?

I think we’re ready
to tell them.

It feels amazing to connect
with Tzarina,

and then we connected
again and again,

and then we connected
another time again.

You’re not going to regret this.

Never. Why would I?

The first thing I told her
was that you’re circumcised.

I’m just so impressed.

Oh, I’m scared to see the sun.

I’m really scared
to see the sun.

Oh, it’s such a beautiful day.

- Have a good day.
- You too.

I’ll see you around.

- Morning, mate.
- Good morning.

- Last night was wild.
- Really?

- Oh, yeah.
- You had fun?

Yeah, it was a really good time.

Yeah.

Joao and Tzarina, finally.

I don’t need to know that.

We’ve got to remember there’s
all that stuff down on the bow,

all that equipment.
We can’t get that wet.

Oh.

- Are you okay?
- Yeah.

you start to feel a
bit like a d*ck, you know,

but then your d*ck is beautiful.

I feel good this morning,

and I’m glad that I finally
really did something for myself.

I think we’re going to
be really good friends,

- your p*nis and I.
- Oh, my God.

Joao is just amazing,

and, yeah, I’m on cloud nine.

Attention, attention.

Tsarina, Joao and Aesha,

please meet in the crew mess
in five minutes

for a preference sheet meeting.

Copy that.

Mmm.
Mmm.

- Hello.
- What’s up?

- All right, guys.
- What have we got here?

San Francisco-based co-primaries
and longtime friends,

Zara Rowbotham
and Melissa Peroni,

are traveling with
their closest friends

for the ultimate girl’s trip.

They’ll be celebrating
two birthdays, a divorce,

and just generally
being awesome.

Nice.

Shoshana, she’ll be
eating semi-Kosher.

Ji dislikes anything
with lots of starch,

bagel, clams, mussels.

Not a big fan
of chicken either.

Melissa, gluten.

They’re going to be
so fun, these girls.

Is there anyone that doesn’t
have a dietary requirement?

I’ve been on a
girl’s holiday before,

and I’m never going
to do it again.

But you have bitching.
Jealousy.

Jealousy,
bitching.

This is a recipe for disaster.

Guests request a
late lunch of high tea

with a Mad Hatter theme.

Their cuisine for
the second dinner

can be at
chef’s discretion

with a neon glow decor theme.

And deck crew is
requested to dress as

a Thunder from Down Under.

Yes!

You know Thunder Down Under is?

- No, I don’t.
- Male stripping.

- Oh, yeah?
- Mmm.

- Yeah.
- Righto.

If you need me, I’m upstairs.

- All righty.
- Thanks.

Margot, Jaimee.

Hello.

Do you mind coming
to the crew mess?

Coming.

- All right.
- Yeah, buddy.

So, yeah, this charter,
I think

they’re going to be
pretty demanding,

but we’ve only got
two charters left,

so bring it the on.

We’ll just carry on with usual
now with you back in service

and you doing housekeeping.

I love Margot,

but I can’t reward her
for drinking on the job.

Once you’ve finished the beds,

could you do a top-to-bottom
from the bridge

and could you do welcome towels,
pulling platter stuff?

So, if we can sit on it,
let me also.

- Okay!
- Thank you!

All crew, all crew provisions
are here on the dock.

Copy.

Yes. Gorgeous.

Oh, cute, a hat.
Mad Hatter!

Please, don’t fall.

All good.

What else is left after that?

Bar’s good,
lunch is pulled.

All right, amazing.

All crew, all crew.

Can we have everyone in
their whites on the aft deck

in half an hour
for guest arrival?

Copy.

Charter number eight.
Let’s go!

No, I don’t want to
smell the same as you.

All crew, all crew.

I’ll meet you on
the aft deck immediately.

Where are these ladies?

I really hope there’s a
drink for me on the boat.

Yeah.

- Hi!
- Hey!

We are in for a treat.

Excuse me?

That’s not what I mean.

I mean in the busy way.

- Hello!
- Hi, I’m Jason.

Hi!
Nice to meet you.

Eight women on board,
come at me.

I’m going to ace this charter
because I know what I’m good at

and it’s flirting
with older women.

- Woo!
- I am loving this!

We’re ready to eat.

Cheers!

Ladies, welcome, welcome.

You all look fantastic.

Aesha will show you around.

We’ll get your luggage on
and we’ll get out of here.

This is the charter
I’ve been waiting for.

Yes, Harry.

So this is the primary suite.

This is gorgeous.

Where did you guys come from?

We all met in California.

Look at all these bags.

All guest luggage is in.

You’ll find we drink heavily.

- This way?
- I’m going to do it.

Nice.

Happy days?

Nice, thank you guys.

This little basket
here is gluten free.

Thank you.

This one is like that
hasn’t touched any meat.

Okay.

- For the vegetarian.
- Oh, I’m not a vegetarian.

- Love meat.
- Okay, great.

- Just not pork.
- That’s easy.

- Oh, okay.
- That’s a charcuterie.

That’s an impressive one.

Can everyone eat charcuterie?

Is that the one thing
we all agree on?

Well, she can’t have
like prosciutto.

I’m not going to eat
a prosciutto

but I’m going to
eat all the cheese.

Ji, are you having cheese?

Wait, I thought you were
lactose intolerant.

Okay, foredeck,

we’ll be trying to come up as
fast as we can.

All copy on deck.

We can take off
the stern crossover line.

Copy stern crossover line.

- Take the bow line off.
- Yeah.

You can take that
spring line off.

Copy, spring line
coming off now.

Grab that fender. Yeah.
Spring line is in.

All lines off.

I actually want to watch
them like take off.

Okay, let’s go.

Two meters off on our bow.

They seem like a
fun group to be me.

Yeah.

They’re already up there.

You are free to swing.
Free to swing.

Luka, wave!

Luka’s a looker.

Can we get them to serve
us drinks in speedos?

Yes.

Absolutely.

Anyone need
another drink, too?

Yeah.

Okay, boys.

Boys, this is our charter.

Take your top off!

Ah, it’s going to be fun.

Coming up...

You’re making it an issue
for everybody.

Why is that?

People had to... ing
draw straws

because no one wanted
to room with you.

- Stop.
- It’s the truth.

Oh, do you?

Here we go.

Please come out.

Oh, hot, hot, hot.

Last charter was a lot for me.

I almost got fired for drinking.

I kind of feel like I deserve
to be here after that,

like I’m being put in a timeout.

I need to sit here and
reflect on what I’ve done.

Oh, we had a big workout.

Smells bad.

- Should we tie this sh... off?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He said wets earlier.

All right, let’s do it.

Let’s do this.
I’m excited.

Yeah.

We’re just watching
these men work.

Yes.

Admiring the view.
It’s fine.

It depends on the day, I guess.

Yeah, it depends on the day
and the guests, right?

Wait, what was your name again?

- I’m Harry.
- Like, Prince Harry.

Like Prince Harry.
You can call me Prince Harry.

Luka!

Luka the looker.

Joao’s pretty cute, too.

These ladies are going
to be a handful.

You can just tell already.
Most of them are single.

You know, when you’re like at
the zoo and you’re like a kid

and you just see
these hungry tigers

and they’re just looking at you
with these, like, sparkly eyes,

they’re hungry.

So you’re new to the boat?

Yeah, I joined three days ago.

- Wow.
- Yeah.

Oh, my God. Cute.

The guests have requested
Mad Hatter theme high tea.

I love getting in there
and being creative.

We have lots of flowers.
We have clocks.

We have cards.
We have butterflies.

I think I grasped the
concept of Mad Hatter.

I mean, I think I’ve watched...

There’s, like, the Tin Man
and stuff.

No, that’s...
Is that something else?

Dude, you are so talented.

Great job.

Thank you.

Yeah, we want the gos.

I have a missus on the boat.

- Yeah, I do.
- Are you serious?

- Jaimee.
- Ah!

Best chef in town.

I love high tea.
I’m English.

It’s in my blood.

I’ve done a million in my times.

I’ve done it for
the Cheltenham races.

You have to do your
little finger sandwiches.

You have to have
a selection of cakes.

Obviously, you have
to have a macaron.

Thank you to France.

And then the English scone.

And the only thing you can have
an English scone with

is clotted cream
and strawberry jam.

Wow. I am talented.

Deck crew, deck crew.

Can one of you
guys that are free,

put on the Mad Hatter
bunny outfit

for lunch in ten minutes.

Copy, Luka’s on it.

Oh, my God.
This is brilliant.

Yay!

Joao thinks he’s throwing me
in the deep end,

but really, I love dressing up
for guests.

In fact, my birthday’s
on Halloween,

so high tea, baby, let’s go.

I might wear this all day.
I kinda like it.

I’m really, like, oddly
attracted to you right now.

Look at this.
Holy...

Yeah, man.
So beautiful.

Thank you so much, you guys.

Yeah, it’s all Jaimee.
She’s amazing at this.

Thank you, Jaimee.

My pleasure.

- Wow.
- Do you like them?

I do.

That’s the gluten free one.

Well done, Cheffy

Cheffy and Luka.

They can just start
bringing it.

Remember, guys, we’re
carrying them from the bottom.

Ah!

Woo!

Lunch for you ladies.

Fabulous!

This is what we planned,
and this is amazing.

Oh, of course.

- So this one is gluten free.
- She’s gonna be here.

She’ll come when she comes.

This one over here.

We are so ready for your food.

This is amazing.

Amazing job.

Yeah.

So who would like some quiche?

Here we go.

Thank you.

Is there a lot of
dairy in here?

- Just stop.
- There’s two cheeses in there.

- So many.
- Okay.

What I like this is...

- It’s fine.
- No, I know my body.

You don’t have to tell me.
It’s okay.

- Do you want...
- I would like some quiche.

They did a really,
really good job.

Deck team ready
on standby on the anchor.

Roger that.

We’re just gonna prep it now.

You’re on.
I’ll go to the stern.

Yep.

Do you want some more rosé?

- Oh, my God.
- The lobster is...

I’m, like, semi-conscious,
semi-hammered.

Oh!

Okay, you can put one shackle
in the water, please.

Keep going.
Keep going.

That’s one shackle
at the waterline.

- Perfect.
- Okay.

- Shall we load up the tender?
- Yeah.

How is everything?

The quiche is amazing.

And the brie little
sandwiches are amazing.

Are you okay with
a little amount?

Yeah, so I have a tablet
that I can take.

I just need to make sure
there’s dairy in it

just so that I can gauge
how much I can consume.

So I’ll try being in good
communication with you.

Yeah.

We’ll just do it like that and

make sure that you’re
going to be all good.

Okay.

Yeah, it’s right there.

Yeah, and that’s why I
say I have to take my...

I’m lactose intolerant
as in, I blow up.

I have massive diarrhea
if I don’t have these.

You forgot to write it on
your preference sheet?

Don’t make us
throw your game off.

She can take lactade pills.

Okay, Melissa.

I have my own dietary needs,
so can you...

Honey, I’m the primary.
I’m the primary.

You’re not
my dietary person, though.

It’s... ing lactose intolerant.

It’s not the end of
the... ing world.

Why are you laying
into this poor girl?

You’ve been voluntarily
eating milk.

And then you’re just going
to add in last minute, like,

oh, I’m sorry,
I’m lactose intolerant.

You didn’t add this?

I’m not lactose intolerant
anymore.

Like, I cannot.
I cannot.

It’s too much.

It’s just, like,
last minute bullsh... .

Like, you’re lactose intolerant,
but you can take lactade pills.

Like, aren’t we all little
lactose intolerant?

Everyone is. We shouldn’t
be eating dairy.

And you forget that?

Why do you guys not understand
that I’m lactose intolerant?

Because you forgot
to... ing

put it on your preference sheet.

Who cares?

Hey! Ladies!
Let’s change it up.

- No, no, no.
- And let’s go.

Stop, stop.

Because you’re making it
an issue for everybody.

You’re make it
an issue for everybody.

I’m just gonna have some scones.

Y’all are missing
some good drama.

We can hear it.

No, it’s... ing bullsh... .

Why?

We had to... ing
draw straws

because no one wanted
to room with you.

- You think that they...
- Stop.

- Stop, stop.
- It’s the truth. It’s the truth.

- They drew straws.
- Stop!

- No, stop, stop.
- Wow.

She’s just now
making up stuff.

Stop. Below the belt.
Below the... ing belt.

We had to... ing
draw straws

because no-one wanted
to room with you.

- You think that they...
- Stop!

- No.
- Stop.

- Stop!
- It’s the truth.

Wow. She’s just now
making up stuff.

Stop.
Below the belt.

Below the... ing belt.

But it’s true.

Toe it. Toe the line.
Toe the line.

Stop!

If you have to agree that
everyone has to draw straws...

- To room with one...
- Stop.

Stop, stop. We’re done.
We’re done.

I’m not, I don’t care.

I don’t think this is
about the lactose.

I think this is bigger
than the lactose.

It’s the truth!

- Jesus.
- The drew straws!

- Oh my God.
- Wow.

Sounds like a bit of trouble
in paradise if you askin’ me.

No, I’m going to check on Ji.

Okay, well, let’s just have fun.

Let’s just have fun.

I was stealing
one of your scones.

Oh!

What?

You’re allowed.
You’re allowed.

I’m not apologizing for...

- Don’t.
- I don’t like her.

Once you get the towels
are ready to go.

Yeah.

- You’re going to go with Luka?
- Yep. Perfect.

Oh sh... .
Okay, let’s go get ready.

- Yeah, go get ready?
- Yeah.

We need swimsuits, cover-ups.

You do not do that.

We’re on tight quarters
in a boat.

Got everything ready, we’re
just waiting for the guest.

We’ve got a small
gap before sunset.

That’s the issue.

Deck crew, deck crew.
Stand down, stand down.

- It’s late.
- Copy that.

That’s really sh... .

Oh well.

That sun went down quickly, eh?

Yeah, probably get
dark quickly as well.

Yep.

Oh my God.
It’s, no, extreme, extreme.

Aesha, the guests are
coming back out now.

Okay, let’s do this.

I need someone to zip me up.

You guys want a
little lychee c*ck?

- Yeah.
- Yes.

So good.

Sorry you guys
missed the beach.

Did you want this?

I’m good. Thank you.

You’re okay?
All right.

- Hot tub!
- Hot tub.

Deck crew, the guests are
going to the hot tub.

- Oh, I swear.
- You all right?

Can I grab your drinks?

- No.
- Okay.

That is awesome.

- How good is tofu?
- I know.

Cappy!

- Hello, sexy dad.
- How are we?

Are you joining us
for dinner tonight?

I can’t, unfortunately.
I’m on anchor watch.

They’re a little bit intoxicated

and they’ve already had
a little bit of a tiff

between themselves today.

I don’t want to be part of it.

You don’t want
to have dinner with us?

- Maybe tomorrow night?
- Captain, come on.

Look, they’re lovely people.

I’d love to join them
for dinner, just not tonight.

I can let you girls
enjoy your night.

Yeah, all right.

No way.

Cheers.

Hey, dear, how’s that
chocolate cake going?

Oh, it’s okay.

It’s not my best work, but...

I have a chocolate on me.

Do we?

You’re a clown.
A cute one, though.

That’s my radio.
I promise.

With Tzarina,
I love our banter.

Is that your radio
in your pocket?

- Yes.
- Oh, it is. Cool.

We’re both on the same page,

where we connect on
many different levels.

Have you canceled on
all your boyfriends

you’re going to see
in Parma yet?

Do you want me to?

Um, we can talk about it.

I’m blushing.
Can you see it?

I’ll tell you what.
Can I ask you for dinner

on our night out?

Um, that doesn’t seem
very casual to me.

I’m not rejecting you,
I’m being sensible by the way.

- Sensible?
- Yeah, I am.

- In what sense?
- Um, I don’t know.

It’s just, you need to let me
know what you actually want.

Yeah, casual’s fine.

It’s a casual dinner.

- Well?
- Yeah.

I thought we were doing
that anyway for passports.

So, are you going to
come for dinner with me?

Okay.

What, at dinner?

No, no, just in general.

I’m totally shocked right now

that I’m feeling so
happy around Joao.

If you told me
this two years ago,

I would have laughed
in your face.

And now look at me.

Minimal self-control.

Coming up...

Right, let’s strip.

Make sure your tie ’em up tight,

they might get pulled off
with this group.

She’s coming out.

What do we think about
going to get ready?

Yeah, yeah.

- You want a hand down in?
- Yes, I do.

One more.

- Hi.
- What’s up?

What was the theme tonight?

It’s just someone’s birthday,

but I’m not really
going all out tonight

because I don’t think
they’re going to remember much.

Are you guys getting ready?

I’m getting my lychee.

- She’s fine.
- Amazing.

Ready, ready, ready.

I don’t think she needs
another drink now.

Girls, we’re going to do
dinner in 15 minutes.

So are we budgie smuggling this?

Do you want to do it tonight?

I’d rather do it tonight
than tomorrow morning.

Okay, let’s do it then.

Because they’re like
...ing crazy at the moment.

They’re going to lose it.

- So we are going budgies?
- Yep.

- Tonight?
- Yep.

They’re going to be like...

There’s a smile
on somebody’s face.

Someone’s going to
get like, harassed.

Sarah, can you get up?

Okay.
Just pop the eyes open.

Okay, perfect.

Literally got these
together and get up.

You and Culver will
be together forever.

Don’t worry.

Okay.

Jaimee Bradbury.
That sounds nice.

Is that his last name?
I had no idea.

Hello.

We’re all sitting
down to dinner.

- Everyone just sit down.
- Sit down.

Sit down.

Okay, boys, we’re going to
do the first round of drinks.

Just all get done and dirty.

Right, let’s strip.

To the pantry with the
budgie smugglers please.

We’re just undressing
as we speak.

Make sure your tie them up tight

because I feel like they might
get pulled off with this group.

They may try.

Right, let’s do this.

Very busy on anchor watch.

Oh, I’m sure. Don’t you
...ing show your face.

Well, are you
a bit cold?

Yeah, it’s cold out,
all right, guys?

Right-o, guys.
Good luck out there.

I think you just keep
eyes on each other.

Watch out.

I’m going to leave mine hanging.

- Go on, Harry.
- I’m not out first, am I?

All right, we’re walking
the drinks out now, Chef.

Copy that.

All right, here we go.

Turn around and shake it.

- Yeah!
- Little turn, little turn.

Gonna be... Oh!

Dirty Harry.

Oh!

She’s coming out.

Oh, sh... .

Three girls, three guys.

I told you to tie them up.

Tie them up on my face.

This is getting wild.

She’s like, I want ba*ls
in my mouth.

We’re just like, what?

Ooh!

Oh, my God.
These women are thirsty.

I don’t know if they think
they’re on a super yacht

or in a strip club,

but wherever that line is,

I think they are miles past it.

I can’t subscribe to this.
Like, you cannot.

Next on
"Below Deck Down Under"...

- Culver.
- Yes.

You need to do
Keith Stone tonight.

Thunder from Down Under.

We’re going to put together
a little choreography.

We’re going to show
these girls what’s up.

Get them with a one,
two, three, slide and snap.

Oh, baby.

Luka is more of the kind of guy
I would typically go for.

I doubt he lives at home
with his mum.

I would love to, like,
finish on the service

if you would let me.

I think Margot has
earned the service role

after what she’s done
all season.

I would shut your mouth
before you offend people.

I didn’t do anything.

Honestly, if you’re
going to get upset about that?

Just don’t say
anything else, okay?

Jaimee?
Jaimee.