01x16 - Citizen McGee/The Internship

[bunniefuu]

MS. ROOP: Get ready
to learn about the relentless

grind of 9-to-5 employment!

It's Internship Week!

What kind of weirdo
gets excited about work?

MOLLY: Internship week?
Yes!

Oh, right.

This internship
is the first step

in my lifelong mission
to en-happify the world.

First, I get an internship,
then I get hired full time.

Soon I'm employee of the year,
then decade,

then I win a lifetime
achievement award

in en-happification!

- [cheers and applause]
- Yes, yes. Thank you. Thank you.

Your understanding
of internships

could not be more wrong, Mol.

Internships
aren't about doing good.

They're about doing
someone else's work for free.

Which is actually a great idea!

BRB!

Our first internship
is Pam's Cake 'n Bake!

That's a good one
because Pam is super sweet.

And I'm not saying
that just because I married her!

I could en-happify
a lot of people at the bakery!

MS. ROOP: The internship
goes to...

- Libby!
- Yes!

Okay, that's cool,
that's cool.

Still lots of great places.

Barkle-Sparkle Animal Shelter.

[gasps] Oh, puppies
make people happy!

MS. ROOP: Andrea!

Wax and Wayne
Candle Shop, Sheela!

Turnips Unlimited, Jeremy!

Book Marks the Spot, Kat!

Seize the Clay, Nashua!

And last but not least,
Molly McGee!

Your internship will be...

Weird Larry's Pawn Shop?

No. This is the place
where happy memories

- go to die.
- [sighs]

Smell the disappointment.

[sniffs] Oh, wait,
that's just Larry's skunks.

[squeaking]

[coughs]
Intern!

Molly, meet
my new intern, Reggie.

[coughing]
Nice to meet you.

So, Mr. Scratch,
what would you say

is your most
effective scaring technique?

SCRATCH: Reg, I'm gonna stop
you right there.

You are nowhere near
scare ready.

Gotta learn to walk
before you run buddy, okay?

Now, start by getting rid
of this stink cloud.

On it, Mr. Scratch!

[slurps]

You should treat him
better, you know.

He could be your boss one day.

It's a risk
I'm willing to take.

[bell chimes]

Well, if it isn't my intern.

Welcome to Weird
Larry's Pawn Shop

where I--I mean--we [chuckles]

buy and sell weird
and wonderful relics,

reminders, and remembrances!

[bell chimes]

Look! A customer!
Go greet 'em, Molly!

Welcome to Weird
Larry's Pawn Shop!

How can I bring you joy today?

Take my old junk.

Okay. Let's see,

we've got rusty pliers,
a rusty fork,

not sure what this is
but it's also rusty.

Sorry, sir, but we're going
to have to--

Take it all!
Here's your cash!

Have a weird, wonderful day!

Thank you and come again!

I'm elated.

Mr. Larry, I don't want
to tell you your business

but you just bought
a bunch of worthless junk.

LARRY: Worthless?
Did you not see this?

Or this?
Or even this?

There's treasure
everywhere Molly.

If you know where to look.

Well, maybe.
Oh! Look at this!

You're my best robot friend.

Good eye, Molly!

Don't worry, robot!

Your previous owner
may have discarded you

and broken
your mechanical heart,

but we're going to
find you a new home--

Yes! A vintage T-140X
dual tone voice box!

Just what I need to complete
my top-secret project!

You have
a top-secret project.?

Several!

And as my intern,

you can help me finish this one.

By filing these here
acquisitions!

[scoffs]

[sighs]

When do I get to scare,
Mr. Scratch?

Right now!
Scare me up a bed, Reg.

- I need a nap.
- I don't understand

- how that is relevant to--
- [mumbling]

Say it with me Reg,

- the place of an intern--
- the place of an intern--

- --is not to question.
- --is not to question.

- Right.
- That's right.

One bed coming up!

[chuckles]
I love having an intern.

That's great,
but I'm learning nothing!

How can I
en-happify the world

if this internship
is en-saddifying me?

[skunk purrs]

[screams]

[coughing]

LIBBY: I brought cupcakes
in the shape of turnips!

I learned how to make them
in my internship.

How cool is that?

Super cool.
Excuse me.

- Ms. Roop?
- What's that smell?

It's like bleu cheese mix
with gasoline.

[chuckles]
Listen, I'm an en-happifier

and the pawn shop is, well,
it's where joy goes to die.

So let's just reassign me
and we'll call it a day.

- Okay?
- No! Of course not!

But I'm sure
you can find a silver lining

in this dark cloud.
You're good at that.

[bell dings]

MOLLY: Maybe you're right.

I can't en-happify the world

before I en-happify
the pawn shop!

- Thank you, Ms. Roop!
- Nope.

I can feel your scent
digging into my nostrils

and it hurts.

[upbeat music playing]

♪ When I'm down ♪

♪ Feeling blue ♪

♪ When I'm surrounded
by a nightmarish milieu ♪

[screams]

♪ I can change the world ♪

♪ I can make it better
if I try ♪

♪ All I ever wanna do
is en-happify ♪

♪ En-happify ♪

♪ Wipe the counter,
mop the floor ♪

♪ Clear the cobwebs
from the case ♪

♪ Move the taxidermy possum ♪

♪ To a less prominent place ♪

♪ Who cares if there's
a funky stunky ♪

♪ Odor floating by ♪

♪ I'll just breathe
through my mouth ♪

♪ And en-happify ♪

[coughing]

Oh, it smells so bad.

♪ Once I start en-happify ♪

♪ I don't plan on stopping ♪

♪ Say goodbye
to broken watches ♪

♪ Tattered kites
and all stunk droppings ♪

Oh, no.

What I asked you for

was an iced-decaf, ten pump,

caramel mocha latte.

What you brought me
is an iced-decaf, ten pump,

caramel mocha frappe.

Completely different drinks!

MOLLY: ♪ En-happify! ♪

♪ En-happify! ♪

♪ En-happify ♪

[whistling]

What in the weird wide world
has happened here.?

I did the filing
just like you asked!

And maybe a little more too.

Now you can find things better.

Where are my cans?

My kites?
My broken watches?

Don't tell me you separated
them from the working watches?

- [purrs]
- No, no, Vera!

Don't go a-spraying!
Molly's here to learn.

And I'm sure
she'll start at some point.

Sorry, Molly.

I was happy with my shop
the way it was.

- Put it all back.
- But...

Please!

I did everything
you asked, Mr. Scratch.

Am I ready to scare now?

Are these green olives?

I wanted black olives!

How could you not know that?

You never--
you never told me--

Think about what you've done.

Oh! Is it time
for my Ghost Council

internship review already?

Review?
No!

Larry, I don't think
I can do this anymore.

My mission is to en-happify
but your shop

is where happy memories
go to die!

Like orange juice
and toothpaste,

we are completely incompatible.

Sorry it didn't work out.
Guess I'll take the F.

Molly, you're looking
at this all wrong.

This shop isn't where happy
memories die.

It's where happy memories...
are reborn!

[machine whirring]

Whoa.

Is this your top secret project?

One of 'em. That voice box
from that old robot?

Listen to it now!

Roar!

You took all that old junk
and made joy!

Okay dragon slayer,
you are up!

[adventure theme music playing]

[screams]

[lighting clapping]

BARRISTER GHOST: Tell us,
Reggie, what exactly

did Scratch teach you
in this so called internship?

Mr. Scratch
didn't teach me anything.

Hmm.

Wait! Please!
Gimme another week!

But let me finish.

Mr. Scratch
didn't teach me anything.

He taught me everything!

Is that so?

Oh, certainly!

I didn't see it at first,
but tucking him in

and fetching him food

taught me patience, perseverance,

how to keep a cool head
under pressure.

And yelling at me--
taught me how to be scary!

Oh, is that--[sniffs] skunk?

Been holding that for days.

Another gem from Mr. Scratch!

Yep.
That was all me, all right!

Oh, well Reggie,
you've clearly learned much.

Which is why we hereby
promote you

to Manager of Scares
Midwest Division!

Scratch!
Did you hear?

I'm your boss!

Now get me a sandwich!

Aim for the belly of the beast!

It's the key to everything!

I crown you Brighton's
best dragon slayer!

And a pretty good intern too!
[laughs]

Larry, you're a genius!

You've got to share this
with the worlds.

Think of all the people
you could en-happify.

[chuckles]
No Molly.

You en-happify the world.

I like doing my en-happifying
one person at a time.

I'm just weird that way.

Okay, Ms. McGee.
Time for your evaluation!

What have you learned
from your internship?

So Much!

I learned
that running a pawn shop

is like slaying a dragon!

Only it takes more than a sword,

it takes an open mind
to slay the beast

that is ignorance and--

she gave me a C-?

But you did learn something?

I did. I learned
that anything and anyone

has the potential to en-happify!

- Thanks Larry.
- Intern of the year.

I've been analyzing
your scare reports

and they're disappointing.

I'd really like to see you pivot
that into an upward trend soon.

[chuckles] I told you
he'd be your boss--

Drop It!

♪ The ghost and Molly McGee ♪

[upbeat music playing]