01x03 - Y Is for Trouble

[bunniefuu]

Already forgotten. Let's party!

Let's party!

- You've drunk enough!
- What? Are you my dad?

- f*ck!
- You have a criminal record.

Hajra is back.

- You want to party?
- Why just three?

I'm done with that crap.

Do you live in Grunewald too?

Got anything to mellow me out?
I'm calling Calle.

- Calle?
- Look what's lying here.

An as*h*le stole Calle's drugs
and left a bag.

We'll sell the stuff
and split the money.

Everything was ruined.
They blasted the bunker open!

Everything! Snow, bo-bo, addys, coke.

You owe us 50.000.

Do you really want to get married?

- Have you met yet?
- No.

- He and his parents come this weekend.
- I hope he's not a d*uche.

f*ck, guys, he's so not a d*uche.

Know who I saw in the store?

Yusuf with his new girl. Just gross!

- Is Mom on break?
- She no longer works here.

Why didn't you say anything?

650 euros for the first year.
Be on time. No drugs.

50 euros a gram.

This is a Calle vial.
Where'd you get it?

Do you know her?

In three simple words, 50,000 cash!

In one week!

If you need help, then...

let me know.

Huh? What are you doing here?

Paula, I need your help.

I need 50.000 from you.

PARA
WE ARE KING

Y IS FOR TROUBLE

Keep it down.

- Are these your father's?
- Yes, my Daddy's, Mom's and mine.

Wilmersdorf 05 Small Caliber g*n Club.

Okay, come here.

My dad never wears this.

You'll easily get
10 to 12 grand for it.

- But I need 50.
- Good God! Then get creative.

Consider it your seed capital.

But I want something in return.

What?

- Remember the guy from the club?
- What guy?

Okay, listen.

He has a sex video of me.
And he wants to put it online.

If my Insta followers see it, then...

So, if you help me,
you can have the watch.

What do you want me to do?

This is the men's room.

- Hi.
- Hello.

If the video of you and Paula
ever goes online,

if a shred of it ends up
on Insta, Facebook or elsewhere,

no sh*t, I'll do you in.

- You got me?
- Yes.

And this pitiful video of some chicas
roughing you up will go right online.

- You got me?
- Yes.

All right.

- Where did you get this?
- I inherited it from my uncle.

Uncle.

Where's the box?

Which box?

The little square thing
with the papers in it.

I lost it.
Can't you use a different one?

- No, I can't.
- You have a few.

- I can get you a box if you want.
- I need the box for this watch.

With the papers for this watch.

Do you understand?

If you have it, that's cool. If not...

I'll give you five.

Five?

It's worth three times that.
On Pankstrasse they offered 15.

152 That's a great offer.

Do that. It's a good deal.
The best offer.

- I'll give you seven.
-12.

- Seven.
- Nine.

- No.
- It's a Rolex!

- I know.
- Your lamp costs seven.

We both know
this isn't your uncle's watch.

And I'm sure
you don't want to hold on to it.

I'll give you seven, now.

Yes or no? If not, out.

Okay, deal.

All right.

Hatam: Are you all right?
Rasaq: Yes. And you? Stressed?

Hatam: No, chill day today.
And you?

Rasaq: The dentist's office
was super busy.

I should actually be studying right now.

Hatam: Actually222?2 :-)

Rasaq: It's your fault.

You're the one keeping me from it. :-D

Hatam: Ha-ha!

I'll be at
a friend's hookah lounge tonight.

Feel like going there?

Hatam wants to go to
a new hookah lounge with me.

I'll only go if you guys come.

Jazz: I'm in.

Fanta: Yes.
Hajra: Sure thing.

Jazz: Woohoo!
Let's check this boy out. Happy.

Okay, I'm in. ;-)

Hatam: Cool. :-)

Hey!

Hey.

We started. Sunday was so hungry.

Why are you eating such unhealthy crap?
I'd have cooked.

It was on sale.

A loan?

It was lying around and I grabbed it.

I got another reminder by e-mail.
Take a look at it please.

Here.

Mom, it's not a reminder, it's spam.

It says "reminder".

Look, if it says "reminder#y-"...

If it says reminder, it says reminder.
They shouldn't even send me that crap.

Hey, you've got
an interview at Mickey D's.

- What?
- Yeah.

- Nice.
- sh*t!

I have to clean then.
Ask if they can change the time.

- No, not good.
- Just ask!

- No, you don't do that.
- How else am I supposed to do it?

Don't look at me like that.

- I'll clean for you, but get the job.
- Really?

- Deal?
- Really?

- Deal.
- Okay.

Mom cooked.

- I don't want beer.
- Do you want ID?

Yeah.

- But with coke.
- Of course!

I don't know. Are my lips too much?

No, you look pretty.
Plus, it's him who has to impress you.

It's just me,
but I say you're prettier without.

- Leave it.
- Hi, babes.

- Hey!
- Showgirl!

Well2

What's that?

- Nothing.
- Did someone hit you?

- No, man.
- Don't sh*t me. Was there trouble?

I knew this was going to happen.
You told me you'd be careful!

- We had trouble. I got smacked.
- It's all ironed out.

What? Are you sh1tting me?
No way! She got smacked.

We stopped dealing.

We're done.

- And now chill. It's your day.
- Don't sh*t me.

- I'm serious.
- We're not sh1tting you.

Hey, do I look like a p*ssy?

- I want to meet your boy.
- Yeah, come on.

- Do you have lipstick on?
- Too much?

- It looks pretty.
- He'll devour you.

What about the wedding cake outing?

- Yeah?
- That was a joke.

- Hello! The checkout is here!
- Can we get it on credit?

- She's getting married.
- You still owe me. No.

Come on, she's getting married.

Everyone is getting married.
And now it's you?

- Hey, be respectful of the bride.
- As a wedding present.

Get a prenup, then you can get the money
in two weeks and pay up. Bye.

- Goodbye!
- Love you.

Still no good.

Married or not.

- How are you doing?
- Hey.

- All good? Hi, Hatam.
- Jazz.

- Hello.
- Hajra.

- Hello.
- Fanta.

I didn't expect four of you.

- Sorry. Surprise.
- Cool. I'll get you a table. Drinks?

- Apple tea.
- Coke.

- Can you get us a hookah?
- Sure.

- Okay.
- What flavor?

Grape and mint.

- Try Love 66, honeydew and watermelon.
- Go on then.

- So?
- Absolutely no way.

- Nope.
- So g*y. He didn't look at my t*ts.

- It's true.
- Hey, are you guys trying to...

Are you screwing with me?

- No, he's sweet. A real gent.
- I got you the VIP table, fire and all.

- Have fun.
- Thanks.

Is it okay if we sit back there?

- Are you doing good?
- Yeah, you?

- Yes. I'm happy to see you.
- Same here.

- You look a bit different today.
- Do I really?

- Yes, your lips.
- Is it too much?

- No!
- Honestly, Jazz said it was.

No! I meant to say you look pretty.

- Thanks.
- Is this spot okay for you?

- Totally.
- I didn't know you'd come with an army.

- I'm always with my three habibis.
- Always?

- Always.
- I know one of them. Haijra, right?

- Yes.
- I think I know her.

- Didn't she rob a corner store?
- It wasn't a robbery.

We were totally high and wasted.

Hajra was in the dumps because
some d*ck broke her heart, and she...

She injured the owner by accident.

She didn't want to do it at all.

And then?

Then she was sentenced to six months.

But it kind of opened my eyes too.

- How?
- No idea.

I don't want to fall on my face
doing dumb, needless sh*t.

I have my goals
and I want to achieve them.

You know?

I know so many people,
so many of them, who were in deep sh*t.

Very few of them managed to get out.
It isn't easy at all.

You can be proud of yourself.

- Hey, crazy, it worked.
- What worked?

I got an appointment
at the bank tomorrow.

- Which bank?
- The one we clean at.

They offer loans
with crazy interest rates.

- What?
- And now?

I thought we could apply for a loan.

- For who?
- For us, Pascal.

Dude, which of us could get a loan?

- Not me.
- I know, but you for sure.

What? Just say, "I'm Jessica,

I heard you're giving away
50 grand, got some for me?"

I don't even have a clue
what interest rates are.

Just 43 grand now.
We got seven for the Rolex.

Yeah, 43 grand is a piece of cake.

- I'll give you a finance crash course.
- Man, you're screwing me.

Why do I have to do everything?

My father kicks me
in the a*s every morning.

Five more minutes.

- He's proud of me.
- How nice.

- So you want to be a dentist?
- I'm just an assistant.

But I might start
dental hygienist training.

Then you can advance and earn more?

That too,
but it'd make my parents so proud.

Then I'd be like a dentist to them.

Jackpot!

It's really nice
to give something back, you know?

I hope some day
my 12 kids think like you.

- 12 kids?
- 12 kids.

- No more than two.
-11.

- Three.
- Nine.

- Three and a dog.
- Okay, you're the boss.

- Okay.
- Just go on and beat me.

- I want to be able to do that too!
- It's easy. Take it.

You have to inhale and then you...
Inhale first.

Yes.

More.

Then you do this with your mouth,
make a duck face.

And then you go... No, softer.

- You look Ret*rded.
- Cut the dumb laugh.

That's how I learned it too.

f*ck, what's he doing here?

Is that Yusuf? He's got a new girl.

Haj, do you want to leave?

No, it's fine.

Man, she looks ugly.

- Aw! She spilled on herself.
- I'm about to puke.

- Here, hold this.
- Hey, Haj!

Really, come on!

Haj!

Hey, please bring another bottle.

Congratulations.

Thanks.

Strange that we've f*cked
the same guy.

His name starts with a Y
and ends in b*stard.

I'm Hajra, Yusuf's ex.

- Didn't he tell you about me?
- No, he didn't.

Tell him I don't think he'll be happy
with an Insta-b*tch version of me.

Sorry, but what is your f*cking problem?

That I'd love to smack your head
against that ugly wallpaper,

but I can't because I'm on parole.

Enjoy the party.

- The guy is such a dumbass.
- He's so disrespectful.

I can't take her seriously.
Did you see her clothes?

- No.
- Just embarrassing.

What did you tell her
in the ladies' room?

It doesn't matter.
How was it with Hatam?

Very nice.
He's a real gentleman.

Him getting you that sweet spot,
how nice was that?

- That was straight.
- Yeah, man.

- What did you guys think?
- I like him.

Yeah, he seems cool.

If you like him, I like him.

Then you like him a lot.

Hey, Fanta, Wedding March.

- That's a Christmas song.
- "O Christmas Tree."

- We have to get out.
- You're full of sh*t.

- Screw you guys.
- Byel

They know they're in a predicament.
They have to pay back in installments.

I know where they live,
who they know, what they eat.

I know how they sh*t.
They're screwed.

They'll bring the money and that's that.

- Who did it?
- Amateurs, really.

Pseudo kleptocrats, casual thieves,
little kids with sticky fingers.

Kids, huh?

The money, end of next week,
or you and your kids are f*cked.

And I mean f*cked really good.

There.

For you.

Do you want to?

Hey, where are you going?

- No one's at the bar. I have to work.
- Hey!

Thanks.

At the current amortization rate
with a low interest rate...

No. At the current interest rate
with a low amortization rate...

Concentrate. We have an hour.

Sorry, Fanta, I didn't sleep much.

Again.

At the current interest rate
with a low amortization rate I can...

A loan, man. You learn
new song lyrics in ten minutes.

Can't you come too? I suck at this.

It'll look silly
if three of us show up.

Okay, Fanta tell me about
the proof of income thing again.

Just say you have a new job
and you'll give it to them later.

Oh, f*ck. Calle's calling.

- Answer it.
- What'll we tell him?

We'll call him after the bank.
Maybe everything will be fine.

- Better.
- Okay, again, from the top.

I calculated it.

At the current interest rate
with a low amortization rate

I can repay the loan on a monthly basis.

Okay, just so I understand.

You need a 50,000-euro loan

SO YOU can open up
a nail care salon, right?

Yes, but I only need 43,000
because I've saved up 7,000 already.

Okay. 43,000-euro loan
with 7,000 own capital.

You've really done your homework.

That's great. It isn't a given.

- Thanks.
- What documents do you have for me?

I have my work contract.

The thing is I just started the job,

so I don't have proof of income.

But I work in food service
and get a transfer every month.

All right.

Ms. Staupe,
we'll see how we can help you.

I'll consult my boss
and be right back with you.

- Cool.
- I'll be right back.

Thanks.

Right, here I am.
Thank you for your patience.

I've consulted with my boss

and, sadly, in the current circumstances
it is not possible to grant you a loan.

Why not?

Loan approval
involves various parameters.

You are still very young
and have had no previous loans.

And, above all,
you have a brand-new work contract.

You have no pay stub as of now.
That makes things very difficult.

I swear I said everything
as we rehearsed it.

What did you say?

- I said amortization rate...
- Interest rate is what we said!

f*ck! No, that's what I said.
I said everything right.

Interest rate...

Did you stay formal?
Did you say "dude"?

- No! I'm not dumb!
- Leave her alone.

It's not your fault.
It was a dumb idea.

- It was our chance.
- It was idiotic. Like we'd get a loan.

Okay, but we have to call Calle back.

- Yeah. Dude, I'm out of ideas.
- Jessica.

I have to find Theo.

Mrs. Kriger!

Why are you out
in a nightgown, barefoot?

Stand up.
Let's go inside.

No, Theo is hungry.

- I'll bring Theo food.
- Who is Theo?

- A hedgehog, your favorite animal.
- I have to find Theo. He's hungry.

- I'll bring him up.
- Jazz, Calle's coming.

I'l go then.

Go on, I'll bring him to you soon.

Are you too pretty to answer the phone?

I see that you're online. Answer!

Calle, we tried to get a loan.
It didn't work.

- We're stressed out big time.
- Stressed? It's so chill!

- You have till the end of this week.
- You said we had till next week.

The Russians use
a different calendar.

They're ancient, for f*ck's sake!

We've got 7,000 euro.
Maybe we'll get 10,000 by then.

- As an installment.
- Cute!

You've f*cked with the Russian mafia.

This Vanya lady is a child molester.
A child molester!

She makes Ghislaine Maxwell seem sweet.

And her blue-laser-pointer-eyed lackey

is in withdrawal
if he doesn't play pool all day.

They won't k*ll you,
they'll take you away.

Separated from one another forever.

Either you'll be stuck in a hostel room
with a bloody Rasputin f*cking you,

or, better yet,
they'll take you to a Romanian hospital

to be cut open
and sell your organs to oligarchs.

If you don't meet the ultimatum
I'll give Vanya your names.

Hey, we've done everything!
We have no other possibility!

I can't hear you, helmet's on.
you,

You're out of your f*cking mind!

Out of the f*cking way, dude!

- Man!
- Dude!

What if we go to a casino?

To go lose everything at once?

What about the jeweler's2
Where I sold the watch.

What about it?

- We rob him.
- Yeah, right.

The guy keeps so much cash there.

He had a few thousand in an envelope.

And there's the register too.

- That's a robbery!
- He'll have cameras.

We'll go in with masks on and stuff.

- You're serious?
- You wanted a plan, that's a plan.

Okay, assuming we did that,

how would we do it?

Hello, this is Samantha Moller.

My aunt died and left me jewelry.

I wanted to ask, if I brought it
to you today, is your store busy now?

Oh, it's empty.

Great. Nice.

Then I'd read the list I made
of all the stuff to you.

Yeah, okay.

But I can't see it over the phone.

- I think it's real gold.
- Okay.

- And then my uncle had a really big...
- Fine. Yes.

Yes... Yes... Yes, okay.

Okay, just bring everything in.
Yeah? Yes.

Yes, all right. Come in, and then...

Hey! Open the door!

- Open the door!
- Blue envelope.

- Open the door!
- Hello?

- There's nothing here!
- Under the register.

There's nothing here.

I can't hold it anymore, man!

- What should I do?
- Just take something.

I can't anymore.

- f*ck!
- Open the damn door!

Hey!

Oh, man!

Fanta!

Are they still there?
Are you guys okay? You got the money?

- No.
- Fanta. f*ck, dude!

What did you do?

Oh my God!

Let's disinfect it.

Take that off. Take it off.

f*ck, dude!

It's okay. That's better.

- Hey.
- Ras, we have a problem.

Why2 What happened?

Sorry.

Why did you tell me everything's fine
if you owe 50,000 euros?

Telling you wouldn't have helped.

You all could've gone to jail,
especially you!

How stupid can you be? Sorry.

That may need stitches.
It doesn't look good at all.

No, I just need painkillers.

If it doesn't get better, let me know.

Sorry, Ras,
that we've gotten you into this.

Hey, can't you ask Matthias?

- Can you hold this?
- Ask him what?

- Maybe he can lend us some money.
- Seriously? No!

However you get your money, it's done.
You can go.

Thanks.

I swear,
you are such an arrogant b*tch.

What was that?

Get married, have five kids.
You think you're better than us.

Don't talk to me like that!

It's true!

Hey, calm down.

You begrudge me this
because you screwed it up with Yusuf!

- Well?
- Well?

- You can knock off now.
- Okay, I will in a sec.

And you owe me something.

Not up to it today.

That's not what I mean.
We still have to have a drink.

Your first shift.

Just a drink?

Yeah.

Okay.

I have to ask you something anyway.

Okay.

Come in.

Make yourself comfy.

- Do you want a drink?
- The barmaid makes the drinks!

No, I'll do it. I've tried yours.

f*ck you.

- Do you have, like, a lamp fetish?
- No.

- Is this a fertility statue?
- That?

- No. Do you know what it means?
- No.

Me neither. But it was really expensive.
Some artist from Warsaw made it.

Warsaw? Warsaw.

You wanted to ask me something.

- I'll just spit it right out.
- Yeah.

- It's massively embarrassing to me.
- Yes.

Sorry, this is embarrassing,
but I have to get it.

Yes?

Yes.

- Yes.
- Moscow Mule?

Yeah.

No.

If I wanted to give Germany all my money
I'd be a teacher or a cop, but I'm not.

No, just do it today.

Do it. That's right. I...

I've got to...
That's right. Thanks.

Bye.

That was my notary.

Yes, inheriting money is expensive.

- But you're inheriting something?
- Yes.

A lot?

Well, I can buy another ugly figurine.

What did your father do?

Besides dying?

Real estate, basically.

Do you have good contacts?

- Yes.
- Okay.

I want to buy a sweet loft
with my first mill.

Infinity pool, in Wedding.

- Yeah.
- Definitely in Wedding.

And I want to see all of Berlin.

- With your first mill...
- Yes.

- Of many?
- Yes. Why?

No, of course.
Got to think big.

- You as*h*le.
- What do you want to do?

Okay. Influencers rake in
loads of dough.

- They are talentless millionaires.
- True.

Butt ugly women
who can't even do their makeup.

I have a talent, I can dance.

- And I can make awesome content.
- Dancing.

Yes, but dancing isn't something
you can do forever.

That's such a Daddy line
you're giving me.

- Yeah? Really?
- Yes. Really.

- Yeah, right?
- Total Daddy line.

My dad said something similar to me
and I started working for him.

Okay, and that's not what you wanted?

No, that's what he wanted.

But that wasn't enough either.

Do you think...
Do you think you weren't enough for him?

Sorry, is that a stupid question?

Wow.

No, probably...

Probably not. Maybe not, yeah.

- I know that.
- Yeah?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

I always had the feeling
that I wasn't good enough for my father.

When I was two he left my mother,
and me too.

And, total cliché,
he sent me a birthday card,

and a Christmas... No, not even.

- Just a birthday card.
- Wow.

Yeah, he did that for a few years.

And then, he stopped sending things,

but I don't miss him or anything.
Not a bit.

No?

I can't say I miss mine either, no.

Why not?

Maybe because he never missed me.

Yeah.

We didn't get along so well, at the end.

We actually never really got along well.

You wanted to ask me something.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah,
but that really doesn't matter now.

Yeah?

Yes, it really doesn't matter.

- Well?
- Did you ask him?

- No.
- No?

- Why not?
- It wasn't the right moment.

What do you mean?
When is the right moment?

We had our first deep conversation.
It wasn't the right time.

- When will it be?
- Tomorrow.

- What'll be different then?
- We'll have a new basis.

A new basis?

Okay, listen. Tomorrow I go to his place
and we spend a nice day together.

And tomorrow evening
we'll have the 50 grand.

- We're out of time. It has to work.
- I know.

Yes, it will work.

- Promise?
- I promise.

Okay.

I need my beauty sleep.

Can you turn the light off?

I'm meeting Hatam later.

Alone?

Yes.

Do you trust him?

What's wrong, Dad?

It's more important
that I can trust you.

Watch out!

Get your car off the bike path!

I don't think you're right
in the head anymore.

- Ow! What's going on, man?
- sh*t!

sh*t! I totally overslept.

- Jazz, you have to get up!
- Don't annoy me.

- You have to clear that sh*t up.
- Not now, man!

- Sorry, boss.
- Oh, already here.

I overslept.
I'm totally stressed right now.

Yes, I actually believe you.

But the guys are
at the construction site.

Okay, where? I'll go now.

Hah! No, that's not how it works here.

Why? It's only 8:30.

Customers rely on me,
I have to rely on you.

Yes. You can rely on me, boss.

I can work an hour longer today.
Or just tell me what to do.

I can sort tools till the guys finish.

Do you know why I let Bettina
talk me into taking on cases like you?

It sucks when people who screwed up
always get the short end of the stick.

But I think that it sucks just as much
when people screw with me.

I'm not doing that.
It won't happen again, I promise.

That was the last time.
Once more, and you're out.

And now, beat it.
Today is over and done.

- Cool car. Can I drive?
- Want to drive?

- Sure.
- Come on, drive.

- Really?
- Sure. Come on.

- But drive carefully. This is my baby.
- Of course.

Hi.

- Who is it?
- I'm trying to find out.

Hey!

- Who is this?
- No!

- Who is this?
- This is Charlotte.

And that's my neighbor.

- Say what?
- Why is she here?

About her flowers.
I'm supposed to water them.

That's right! You said, the big ones
once a week, small ones twice.

- And not in the sun, they're sensitive.
- That's bullshit!

It's good to get to know each other.
We see each other so often.

Stop talking sh*t.
Who is this choir lady?

- I'm his girlfriend.
- Okay.

Whoa! What do you think of him
not respecting you? Hands off!

Are you f*cking this tax accountant?

- I'm an architect.
- That's right.

f*ck who you want,
but you're done f*cking me!

f*cking b*stard!

- Can I drive faster?
- Do you want to?

- Yes, I want to hit the gas.
- Do it! They're all passing us.

- I can't go faster!
- Faster!

Drivel

Hajra!

- We have to talk.
- Just screw off.

- Then cut the psycho sh*t.
- What psycho sh*t?

- What was that with Ayla?
- I just told her the truth.

- Just leave me alone, and Ayla too.
- I am.

Yusuf from the hookah bar
doesn't interest me.

- What?
- Embarrassing!

The real Yusuf
would've laughed at that crowd.

Got a problem
with me getting my life in order?

- Some people grow up.
- Yeah, sure.

The crap life
your parents want you to have.

- Watch your mouth!
- Oh yeah?

- Watch your mouth.
- Want me to?

- Your family insulted me!
- You're a mess!

High all the time, causing trouble,
dragging people down with you.

- They know your rep is bad around here.
- Dude, f*ck you!

f*ck yourself!

You're not even ashamed of
what you did to me!

Your mother tried to fix you up
with random c**ts,

while we were together!

- You did nothing!
- Maybe that was good.

Maybe I was too blind to see
that you were f*cking up my life!

- f*ck youl!
- f*ck yourself!

- I hate youl!
- I hate you too!