01x03 - Artoria, The Calamity

[bunniefuu]

WEBVTT

My name is Hiiragi Seiichi.
I'm a second-year in high school.

One day, I was sent to another
world that isn't Earth.

There, I ate some Fruit of Evolution,

and gained an OP physique
while still Level 1!

On top of that, a gorilla named Saria...

evolved into a beautiful woman?!

A super cute one, too!

We left the forest together,

but what's gonna happen to
my life in another world?!

We should head for the
nearest town first, right?

Yeah.

Once we register at an adventurer's guild
there, we'll get proof of identification.

That should also

give me a chance to meet up with
Kannazuki-senpai and the others.

Jiggle!

How cute!

This is a slime?!

Appraise!

It's Level 88?!

Slimes are the weakest of
weak mobs, aren't they?

That's too strong!

Jiggle!

It's fast!

So this is the Sixth Sense skill?

Take this!

Wow, amazing!

You really are strong!

A-Am I...

some kind of monster now?!

Seiichi, what's that?

Boots and cards?

You can wear the boots, Saria.

Thanks, Seiichi.

I'll take these.

Skills: Absorb and Compress acquired.

You have leveled up.

Skill: Disguise has ranked
up to Disguise Prowess.

Crap! I'm becoming even more of a monster!

Huh?

So bright!

Hey!

My eyes! My eyes!

It turned into a robe?

This just fell.

A letter?

Hello! Mister Sheep here.

It was your doing?!

Congratulations on leveling up!

You're steadily leaving humanity behind.

Shut up!

Now, your helmet suddenly
transformed into a robe, did it not?

This is because it evolved with you.

It evolved?!

Your Skill, Disguise, has leveled up!

Thanks to that, you won't have everyone
finding out how monstrously strong you are.

Which means there's no longer
any need to conceal your face,

so it transformed into a common robe.

That's a long explanation!

But this is great, Seiichi!

Also, this letter will
automatically self-destruct.

Huh?

Kaboom!

Seiichi!

Screw you!

It's my first time wearing shoes.
How do they look?

Yeah, you look really good in them.

I'm so happy!

So, once again, we began
walking toward a town.

The Fruit of Evolution:

\h\hBefore I Knew It,

Artoria, The Calamity

What? You don't have any
proof of identification?

That's impossible.

Even sl*ves have that.

Right...

But we lost ours.

Oh, well, then.

Both of you, go ahead and
place your hands on this.

This is the Gem of Truth,

an item that identifies the
criminality of those who touch it.

Oh, no.

I'm using Disguise, but that'll
be meaningless, won't it?

Good, you pass!

Next up is the beauty.

You're both good to go in.

We did it, Seiichi!

But you should get your proof of
identification made as soon as possible.

Right.

We're going to have the
guild issue them right away.

What?!

Wh-What did you just say?!

Huh?

That's the one place you don't want to go!

No matter what happens,
stay true to yourself!

Huh?

If anything goes down, you come to me!

I'll lend you an ear!

Whatever you do, don't make
any hasty decisions! Got it?!

Y-Yes.

Good!

I'm Claude Schreizer.

Feel free to just call me Claude.

I'll do that, then.

I'm Seiichi. Nice to meet you.

I'm Saria! Nice to meet you!

Yeah!

I'm more than happy to get
to know beautiful women.

So then, once again...

Welcome to the royal capital, Telbert!

So this is the guild?

Yeah. It seems like a normal
place, despite what Claude said.

What an exaggeration.

Come on, come on, come on!

You perverted, masochistic pigs!

Cry out with your plebeian voices!

Don't act spoiled!

More, please, Queen!

Yeah, this is the guild.

What's the matter? Aren't we going in?

Huh?

Y-Yeah, just hold on a second.

Come on, come on, come on!

Give me an even more vulgar cry!

Hot! Hot!

Thank you so much!

Damn!

Anything will do.

Just let me destroy something!

He's wost it again.

You should go shtop him.

No! Today is the perfect day for streaking!

If I got into a fist fight and got blood
on my briefs, that just wouldn't do!

Twue.

It's a gathering of perverts!

Hey, what's going on inside?

The sight will taint you!

Let's just move on! We should be able to
get proof of identification elsewhere.

There's no need for that!

It's a new type of pervert!

That's right, I'm...

Guild Master, Guscle Clute!

Abdominal and thigh!

This is the guild master?!

He's just some dude who
thinks muscles are great!

I heard what you need!

You're welcome to come
register with our guild!

Go on! Go on! Go on!

Go on! Go on!

Hey! Wait!

Guscle!

Eris-kun!

We have the first new applicant in a while!

Oh, dear. This outfit isn't
fit for receptionist work.

I'm sorry you two had to
witness such a shameful sight.

I'm Eris McClain, the one in
charge of reception here.

Wow, so cute!

Her range is incredible.

Seiichi-san, is that correct?

If you'd like to register with our guild,

you must have your own reasons.

True...

If I want to see everyone else...

Our guild headquarters here collects

all kinds of information
from around the world,

so if you register, I'm sure
it'll be to your benefit.

Seiichi!

Saria?

I think we should register with this guild!

Huh?

I mean...

They all look they're having so much fun.

All right.

We'll join this guild, then.

Oh! I knew you would say that!

Haven't seen you here before.

You new here?

I just joined this guild.

I see.

Come with us for a bit.

Seiichi...

Saria, you wait here.

I'll finish this up quick.

B-But...

First, show us your damn face!

Whoa...

Hot guy...

Shall we do it?

It only hurts at first.

Once you get used to it, it's fine.

It's our own little welcome party for you!

This is too high-level for a virgin like me!

No!

Please let me go!

Wait!

Hey!

Don't hold back!

You'll enjoy life twice as much!

I'm good, thanks!

What incredible jumps and speed.

Such strong legs and loins.

That's exactly the kind of
new man we're looking for!

I'm back.

Thank goodness you're safe!

Yeah, I'm fine now.

I can't believe you made it back safely.

Yes, you're the first one to do so.

Seriously?!

Hey, Guscle! Do something about those three!

They're all doing what they
believe is best, though!

Don't laugh it off!

Anyway, we'd like you two to
take a few tests for us now.

Huh?

Well, they're only really tests in name.

It's actually a way to assess
what kinds of quests are suited

to an applicant's abilities.

Yeah!

Most of the quests this guild
gets are defeating things,

gathering things, odd jobs,
and guard missions,

so we assess your abilities in each field.

I see.

So that's how it works.

However, you're required to have
a B-Rank or higher adventurer

accompany you as your test proctor.

Right now, we only have one of those.

I bet it's gonna be another unique charac—

What the hell?

You actually selected me for this?

That's the A-Rank adventurer, Artoria.

I already told you, didn't I?

I refuse to proctor any tests.

Seiichi, your face...

Hey, newbie!

You don't want me as your
test proctor either, right?

Huh? Well, I don't really care...

Are you insane?!

I understand how you feel, but...

Shut up!

He was able to escape
safely from the Mohawks,

so he might be able to
survive your predisposition.

Predisposition?

What are you even basing
that suggestion on?!

Well, that's...

my muscles, obviously!

My muscles are the greatest reason!

I don't understand anything here.

Ugh, damn it!

Fine, then!

If you're that insistent,
then I'll take on the job.

And, uh, you know...

Sorry... about earlier.

I'm Artoria Gremm...

Artoria, the Calamity.

So about the tests...

First, we'll take on quests for odd jobs.

Odd jobs?

We have three kinds.

Help out an orphanage,
demolish a building, and walk a dog.

They really are just odd jobs.

Normally we'd only do one,

but that stupid Guscle

probably dumped the unpopular ones on us.

Hm? What is it?

Well, you're cute when you smile.

I thought so, too!

Artoria-san, you're so cute!

Quit spouting stupid crap
and let's get moving!

Seiichi, is it okay if I do this quest?

Will you be okay, though?

Leave it to me!

I'm an expert at this stuff!

I can work hard, too!

Hardly anyone would accept it
since the reward was so low.

You're a big help.

I'll do my best!

Everyone, it's nice to meet you!

Um, why are you walking
so far ahead of everyone?

Wait!

It hurts!

Are you o—

Come on, don't cry.

Ah, that looks painful.

Hold on a sec.

This will sting a bit.

Ow!

I'm okay now.

Artoria-san!

A defense skill?!

It's almost as if she anticipated
that from the beginning.

I'm just no good.

Lady?

The second quest is demolishing a building.

So where should we... start...

Hey!

I should break this here, then?

Huh?

You dumbass!

Once again, someone else is
suffering a tragedy because of me.

I've always had this predisposition,
ever since I was child.

It always affects everyone around me.

Which is why I can never rely on anyone else,

and I decided to live by myself.

Damn it! Damn it!

I knew this would happen.

I'm Artoria, the Calamity.

Everyone who gets involved with me

suffers calamities, without exception.

Huh?

Dust got in my mouth.

You dumbass!

Don't go acting on your own
without waiting for directions!

Huh?

Listen!

The job you're aiming for is adventurer!

In this line of work, selfish actions
can get a whole party k*lled!

Do you understand that?!

I...

An adventurer doesn't need
the greatest might or magic!

They need the ability to sense danger!

Right...

There's no point in anything if you die!

Besides...

You have Saria to worry about!

I-I'm sorry.

Well, I may be strict about that,

but this time I'm partly at fault, too.

Anyway, I'm glad you're safe.

Th-There's nothing else, okay?!

Come on, let's hurry on to the next one.

She might actually be a really kind person.

It's been five months already?

Things never go well, do they?

You were tough on them during training today.

Why is that?

Because I don't want them to die.

Huh?

They have nothing to do with our w*r.

Yet we're asking them to
defeat the Demon Lord?

I just can't agree with that.

That's...

Orphe...

You're the only one I'd say this to.

I'm against this w*r with the demons.

That's not good!

If anyone heard you say that...

I don't want to let a single one of them die.

If they came here from a peaceful world,

I wish they could have gone on
living in that wonderful place.

The final trial is just walking a dog.

It'll be a piece of cake, then.

This is a wolf!

Huh?!

Seiichi-san and Milk-chan look like
they're having an awful lot of fun.

Are you kidding me?!

Seiichi!

If it looks like you're really in danger,
I'll rescue you, so don't worry!

You're definitely not saving me, then!

Still, Artoria-chan, you've changed.

Huh?

Well, you're smiling more than you used to.

Maybe it's because of him?

O-Of course it's not!

I'm just acting as their test proctor

b-because I have to!

My, my, is that so?

Here is your reward for
completing these quests!

Where did you just pull that from?!

All right!

Now get some good rest!

Rest is important for muscles, too, you know!

By the way, do you have an inn to stay at?

Now that you mention it...

Guess we'll just camp out.

But your bodies won't be properly rested.

Um...

I-If you need a place,

how about the inn I'm staying at?

What did you say?!

What?!

W-Well, you know.

I figured it would be more, um...

The rate's reasonable, too.

And the food's good.

Our Artoria-san is...

M-My pecs are stunned!

I-I won't force you to!

Please let us!

A lot happened today,

but I think we've found some hope
for a steady life in our future.

Seiichi's Status for Today

Time for "Seiichi's Status for Today"!

Wh-What is this segment, anyway?!

Seiichi's present Status is... this!

Hiiragi Seiichi
Race: Human Gender: Male
Class: Unnamed Monster
Age: 17 [17] Level: 10
Mana: 1016030
Defense: 1013270
Agility: 1020270
Magic Attack: 1015580
Magic Defense: 1016680
Luck: 1009040
Charm: Too Heart-Throbbing to Endure

Wow!

Your Level jumped right up to 10!

You're not half bad, huh?

Equipment
High Quality Shirt. High Quality Pants.
High Quality Undershirt. High Quality Briefs.
Clever Monkey's Chain. Water Spirit's Dagger.
Bracelet of the Night. Dark King's Stone Choker. Necklace of Endless Love. Rapier of Whirling Hatred.
Rapier of Overflowing Fondness. Blue Boots.
Personal Skills
Instant Recall. Instant Learning.
Instant Recovery. Complete Harvesting.
Sixth Sense.

My Status has increased so
explosively, it scares me.

Skills:
Attack: Guillotine Kick. Twin Fang Attack. Adamant Claws.
Resistance: Paralysis Resistance. Sleep Resistance. Confusion Resistance.
Charm Resistance. Petrification Resistance. Bind Resistance.
Poison Resistance. Fatigue Resistance.
Movement: Instant Movement.
Special: Advanced Appraisal. Superior Alchemy. Enemy Detection. Absorb.
Disguise Prowess. Assimilate. Clairvoyance. Compress.
Tool Creation [Superior].

Hey, what is this "Compress"?

It's a skill that allows
him to compress anything.

He can compress his own body, even his
power, and basically anything else.

However, he has to touch
whatever he wishes to compress.

Then what would happen if he touched
your boobs with this Compress skill?

Wha—

B-Boobs...

Don't stare at them!

I-I wasn't staring that hard.

While continuing our tests
to become adventurers,

we get teleported into a mysterious dungeon!

There we find the legendary dragon said to be

the strongest member of
the Demon Lord's army!

Next Time
Black Dragon God's Dungeon

Next time: "Black Dragon God's Dungeon."

Artoria-san!