02x09 - Tech

[bunniefuu]

jovial orchestral music

[mechanical whirring]

[typing]

Like Santa, tech knows when you're sleeping and knows when

you're awake...

and knows when you're menstruating,

so delete your cookies.


-[zap]
-[glitching]

Oh, no!

It's mad!

Control, alt, delete!

Control, alt, delete!

Technology is coming for us, whether we like it or not.

Run!

[sighs] Just kidding...

You can't hide!

Whether it's NFT or a dot com bubble,

AI or Ja Rule's Sims, tech is terrifying,

but it makes our lives so much easier.

Roomba?!

Roomba?!

[banging]

Oh, don't mind him, he's just, uh...

feelin' himself.

[beeping]

Tonight, I'll be talking with Blake Griffin.

Obviously, I can beat the robot up.

[beeping]


-dramatic music
-Wow!

And Joel Kim Booster.

I don't know anything about tech.


-Yup.
-[Ziwe] Hm.

I said it.

And while you're watching me, tech will be watching you.

Ziwe starts now.

[laughs]

[echoing laugh]

[glitching]

cool theme music

An athlete, a comedian...

Snip, snap, to the flo'.

[Ziwe VO] A public advocate of NFTs.

When I think Big Tech, I think of my guest tonight,

because he's '.

Please welcome Blake Griffin.

elegant strings

Hi.

Thank you for coming to do the show, Blake;

this is an honor.

You're one of my comedy heroes.


-Oh, thank you, appreciate it.
-[Ziwe] Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

What do you think of this robot?

Uh, it's cool.

Got my face, obviously.

Uh, Brooklyn Nets hat, that's cool.

I think it started out as a trash can, which...

seems insulting.

I like that you're a little competitive with this robot.

Competitiveness is, like, the name of the game...


-[computer booting]
-My game, uh, so yeah.

How did you prep for this?

Uh, I just watched every episode front to back.

You're really, really, like, a tenacious researcher.


-[softly] Yep.
-[softly] Yep.

What'd you learn from the Chet episode?

Uh, that one, boy, that one was good,

'cause, uh, obviously, his dad is Tom Hanks.


-[Ziwe] Mm.
-[computer booting]

You seem to know a lot about people's credits and who they're


-related to.
-Mm
-hm.

What is that about?

Um, I don't know, I recently got a IMDb Pro subscription


-so...
-[Ziwe] Oh!

[Blake] Just put that to use.

Got it.

Recently, you said for every dunk you made,

you donated $ to fight child obesity.

[Blake] Mm
-hm.

So is child obesity a game to you?

I sort of addressed it as a game...


-[Ziwe] Mm.
-But it's not a game.

I think me and Michelle Obama are both on the same page;

we know it's a very serious matter.

How often do you compare yourself to the most powerful

Black woman in America?

A lot.

More than you would think.

Um...

What do you think is more important for children,

to understand NFTs or childhood obesity?

Childhood obesity comes in many shapes and sizes.

[Ziwe] Mm.

And not every kid has to have a six pack...

but it'd be nice.

Did you have a six pack as a kid, Blake?

I don't think I did, I don't remember.

What did you look like as a kid?

Uh, I looked like a smaller, younger version of myself.

That was a joke written by Alexa.

She ghostwrote for me.

bass riff

One of your NFTs is going for six dollars.

What do you plan on doing with that money?


-I donated it.
-You donated it.


-Yeah.
-To where?

Uh, to childhood obesity.

To childhood obesity.

Only six dollars, you cheap [bleep]?

Well, no, that was on top of the hundreds, uh,

the dunks, the dunk money.

Could you explain what an NFT is to me?

And explain it to me like I am an idiot.

Okay, so, the N in "NFT" stands for "non"...


-Okay.
-Which is like "not."

F stands for "fungible."

Which is like?

It's fun but it's manageable.

Oh!

You know, it's, like, fun to look at,

it's nice to look at, but it's also manageable.

Like, it doesn't
-
- it's not overpowering.

You know how some art is a little bit overpowering?

They tried...to k*ll...my wife!

And then "tokens."

You know tokens.

Uh...

Yeah, but if you could elaborate for me...

It's just a token.

At the end of the day, it's just a token.

Just a token.

I'm not convinced that you're not a robot,

and that's why we booked you for this show.

What gives you that impression?

Your monotone.

You're saying I need to...

have a little bit more voice inflection?

No, I think you have to be exactly how you were programmed.

Thank you, thanks.

spirited piano music

If you could go back in time, would you k*ll [bleep] or invest

in Bitcoin in ?

Uh, I don't really condone k*lling,

uh, so, you know...

[inhales deeply]

[sighing] probably k*ll [bleep].


-Thanks, Blake.
-[Blake] Yeah.

jaunty music

[laughter]

Do you like 'em?!


-Love 'em.
-Really?

As much as I love you.

Oh, I love you too. [laughs]

Well, I guess that's it!

What a wonderful Christmas, Greg.

Well, that's not quite everything.

What? Ah!

[gasps]

[man VO] This Christmas, tell her you love her with three

little letters.

upbeat Christmas music

N
-F
-T.

This is the big one.

[chuckling] What?!

Oh, my... [typing]

[chuckles] You're crazy!

[man VO] Let her know how much you really care...

financially.

This holiday season, make your memories non
-fungible.

[laughs]

Oh my gosh!

A monkey in sunglasses smokin' a joint?!

It's perfect!

It's a picture on the computer

[shrieking monkey]

jaunty music

upbeat strings

Are you a triple threat because you're an athlete,

comedian, and businessman?

Or because of all the people you've punched,

slapped, and kicked?

Um...

I think in the traditional sense of, um...

is it "multi
-hyphen"
-
- "multi
-hyphen?"


-Yeah, "multi
-hyphenate."
-Yeah, yeah.

Uh, I think in the traditional sense of, um...


-human...
-[Ziwe] Mm.

Um...

ally...

Human, ally...

And, uh...

you know, just g
-
- good guy.

Human, ally, good guy.

And who are you an ally to, Blake?


-Most
-
- everyone.
-Everyone.

Everyone that needs allysh
-
- allyship.

Everyone that needs allyship.

Yeah.

And could you name one marginalized group that would

need allyship?

Well, I don't think people need,

because that sort of, uh, portrays the idea that,

um, they're not capable of doing anything on their own.

Yes.

[Blake] I think allyship is more like,

uh, a friend.

You know, when you say, "I'm here any time you need me,

you can call me," and you pick up that call,

that's sort of my definition of allyship.

Your definition of allyship is picking up the phone when a

friend calls?

No, no, no, that was an example.


-Uh...
-[call error tones]

Do you think Alexa is a Black woman,

or do you not think a Black woman could know everything?

No, she's
-
- she's artificial intelligence.

[inhales deeply]

[sighing] And Black women are real.

Explain more about Black women.

Uh, Alexa is artificial intelligence,

and she's helped people, but Black women have helped more

people.

Did that answer sound good in your head?

Uh, as I was saying it, again, yeah.


-Got it.
-[laughs]

So what advice would you give a Black woman who's not '?

Uh, not ', what advice would I give you?

Just be yourself.


-Oh, just be yourself.
-[Blake] Yeah.

I feel like I've heard that before.


-Shia LaBeouf I think said that.
-[Ziwe] Oh, yeah.

In Transformers.

Tell me
-
- tell us more about how Shia LaBeouf is an

inspiration for your allyship.

Uh, Shia LaBeouf...

was the star of Even Stevens.

Uh, his sister in the show, Christy Carlson Romano,

also Kim Possible.

She was a very empowering female figure,

um, and taught young...women that...

anything is possible...

Kim Possible.

That was like an Ask Jeeve answer.

Did you memorize that before this interview?

Yeah, I, um
-
- no, no, no, I've
-
- that's just general

knowledge.

[typing]

The National Basketball Association.

Do you have TikTok?

Will Smith.

Jackie Chan and, like, Owen Wilson.

Wild Wild West, that was, uh...

Tommy Lee Jones?

Birth of a Nation was great.

Django.

Kills all the racists almost at one time.

Calvin Candie... [clicks tongue]

Dead.

Black history is very important.

Got it.

You once said, "Forget the color of the dress;


-what color am I?"
-Yeah.

What color are you?

Mostly pink and oranges and, like,

a little bit of red.

On a scale of Drake with a British accent to Drake with a

Jamaican accent, how ethnic would you say you are?

Uh...

[sighs] Drake with British, Drake, uh...

Probably, uh...

Honestly, the best part is just, like,


-I'm right down the line.
-Wow.

Can sorta play both sides.

Sort of a racial chameleon.

I appreciate your commitment to...

your own idea of reality.

[laughing] Yeah.

No, it's, uh, part of being a good guy.

Part of being a good guy is making things up?

Yeah.

Could you say to camera "Beep, boop, boop, bop?"

Beep boop, boop bop.

That's the N word for robots.

How could you say that?

Well...

I mean, I think I can say it.

Can you?

Yeah, I think so.

Do you think a robot could beat you in one
-on
-one basketball?


-No.
-[Ziwe] No?

[Blake] No.

Okay, you seem like you're a fan of the robot more than me.

Look at his face lookin' at you like you a little punk!

Yeah, it's a smug look, but...

There's a lot of tension going on between you and that robot.

You're either gonna kiss or fight.


-I don't wanna fight him.
-You don't wanna fight him?

Do you want to show your abs?

[laughs]

No.

[crew laughter]

But then how do you know that yours are better than the

robot's?

Well, from the looks of it, those are just pipes.

He can hear you say that.

Can he?

[Ziwe] That's why he's frowning like that.

That seems like a half
-smile.

Or like a "Psh, I just said something."

Make that face again, please.


-It's like a...
-[Ziwe] To camera.

[electronic beeping]

My goal was to get you to take off your shirt and fight this

robot, but it doesn't seem like that's gonna happen.

I don't know, man, I just, you know...

I'll fight him.

I don't think the shirt's necessary.


-Right now?
-[Ziwe] Yeah.

[reverberating] I like that you're a little competitive with

this robot.


-[echoing] Yeah?
-[Ziwe] Yeah.

Beep boop.

You seem like you're a fan of the robot more than me.

[Ziwe] [reverberating] You're either gonna kiss or fight.

dramatic music

[clattering, glitching]

Yeah, obviously I can beat the robot up.

[electronic chime]

I don't really condone k*lling.


-[whack]
-[robotic glitch]

[Ziwe VO] Next on Ziwe...

Which one is Michelle Williams?

Michelle Williams?

dramatic silent film music

They look very similar.

jaunty music

Do I live in a simulation?

No, I live in the TV.

jaunty music

I'd like to propose a toast.

Oh!


-To us.
-[woman] Okay!

[clink]

[man VO] Fellas, forget the ring.


-uplifting music
-[choking]

[man VO] Use an NFT to pop the question.

Is this what I think it is?!

Why don't you...

see for yourself?

[woman] Oh!

A second NFT?!

Of a Tweet?!

About ba*ls?!

[chuckles]

I sold my kidney to buy it, but...

that's why the Lord gave me two,

and the Lord gave me you.

I'm the only one who can see this?!

Well, not exactly; everyone can see it, but...

you're the only one...who owns it.

So...

will you marry me?

Will I marry you?!

Of course I will, Greg, of course I will!

[coughs]

[chuckling] Oh...

[man VO] A picture is worth , words...

or all of your yearly income.

It's the link to her heart

[shrieking monkey]

jaunty music

Blake, in one word, what makes you human?

Um...

my mind.

Or mind.

Okay, let's play a game called Prove You're Not a Robot.

Sing the jingle.


-Sing the jingle?
-Yeah, make a jingle up.

Uh, When you're
-
- [bleep]


-[claps]
-I'd hope that's license
-free.

To play, we're going to give you some CAPTCHA tests to answer.

If you're not a robot, they should be easy.


-Ready for this first one?
-[Blake] Mm
-hm.

[Ziwe] Puzzle Piece.

If you get the puzzle right, that means that you are human;

if it's wrong, you're clearly a robot.

Ooh, that's tough.

Which one is tough, exactly?


-This one's tough.
-I don't make assumptions.

Yeah, well, that's not gonna fit.


-That's tough.
-Wooooow!

[affirmative chime]

[Ziwe] Hm.

[Blake] That guy's obviously bad.

[Ziwe] Hm.

Do you wanna apologize to any communities?

I would like to apologize to...

all the...

um, military that fought against...

the Confederates.

[Ziwe] You mean the Union?

Yeah.

Okay, next CAPTCHA: you have to read it to camera,

and if you can read it, you're not a robot.

Hm, I
-
- you know what?

I'm startin' to come around on the robot idea.

Okay, so you're not gonna read this?

I just
-
- no.

[Ziwe] Next game!

Blake, did you know that sometimes,

facial recognition technology can't tell the difference

between Black people?

Really?

I didn't know that.

Really, you didn't know that?

No, I didn't
-
- well, no, I mean,

yeah, I had heard that, but I didn't know that that was still

a thing that...

[softly] we're dealing with here.

[clicks tongue]

Probably shouldn't have answered that way.

Great, because it's time to play Are You Less r*cist Than a

Robot?

Sing the jingle.

If
-
- [bleep] [claps]


-Okay, Blake...
-[Blake] Oh...

Are these two different people?

Yeah!

Yeah, I would like to think so.

And who are these Black people?

Allies.

[Ziwe] Okay, Rosa Parks
-
-

Yeah, I was gonna say Rosa Parks.

You were gonna
-
- oh, you were?


-Oh, you were
-
-
-I was gonna say Rosa Parks.

Oh, you were gonna say Rosa Parks?


-And the other lady?
-[inhales deeply]


-Louisa May Alcott?
-No!


-[Blake] Yeah, no.
-What?!

[chuckling] I don't know, I don't know!


-Who is it?
-Claudette Colvin.

Yeah, Barack Obama and Malcolm X.


-[Ziwe] Okay!
-Next! [chuckles]

[affirmative chime]

Sorry.

[laughing] Sorry.

You can hold it up.

You got it, congratulations.

[Blake] Yeah, thank you.

Next one?

Which is which?

[Blake] [softly] Tia and Tamera...

Which one's Tia, which one's Tamera?

Tia is the one
-
- ohhh!

Tia is the one on the right?

Okay, and then the other's Tamera?


-Tamera?
-[Ziwe] No, that's wrong.


-[Blake] That's wrong.
-This is both Tamera and Tamera.


-[negative bloop]
-[Blake] [chuckling] Oh, wow!

Yeah, so don't you feel like a goofball?

Yeah, I mean, they're twins, you know.

They're sisters...sisters.

bass riff

That has been the show!

Blake, do you have anything to say about racism?

Uh, racism, there's no
-
- there's no
-
- there's no place

for racism.

Spoken like a true robot.

Thank you, Blake!

[AI robot voice] Thank you for having me.

jaunty music

I'm rich in both friendship and Bitcoin.


-[alarm]
-Wait...what?

[scoffs]

I guess now I'm just rich in friendship!

jaunty music

"Surveil Me" by Ziwe

jaunty music

You may know him from his hit movie on Hulu,

or comedy special on Netflix.

He's one of the original hot people of comedy.

A g*y icon, a millennial, a one
-time WeWork employee.

Please welcome Joel Kim Booster!

elegant strings

Gorgeous, gorgeous.

Thank you, thank you so much for having me.

Now, why do you think you're here for the tech episode?

Um...

I'm not gonna lie to you; it feels a liiiiittle racially

charged, because I don't know anything about tech,

so the only other explanation I have is that maybe,

being an Asian person, you thought I did.

[laughing] Not to come on your show and
-
- [clears throat]

Wow.

So you're saying you know nothing about tech,

but you happen to have worked at multiple start
-ups.

I have worked at multiple tech start
-ups.

I was an early employee of Groupon.

[Ziwe] Wow.

I worked at several start
-ups in New York,

I worked at a WeWork, um, which was a nightmare.

It was a nightmare why?

The sell of WeWork is, like, it has to be about,

like, the camaraderie and the kombucha of it all.

And I was just there to work, I was just there to get my check.

Got it, you're sort of anti
-community,

pro
-, um, working
-yourself
-to
-your
-grave.

Exactly.

So you have a movie on Hulu, a stand
-up special on Netflix,

you're in a TV show, Loot, on Apple.

Are tech conglomerates a net good or a net evil for society?

For society, I would say...net evil.

I think for me, personally, in my career, um...

net good.

But...

you know, I would
-
- I would take the lack of success in my career

if the world was doing better, you know?

But, like, I'm not gonna be the only one who's not benefitting.

Like, you have an iPhone.


-They're bad but...
-Mm.

You not having an iPhone is not gonna stop iPhones from being

bad.

So can you just say to this camera that there is no such

thing as personal responsibility?

[barely audibly] There is no such thing as personal

responsibility.

Louder.

[slightly louder] There is no such thing as personal

responsibility.

Hm, hm.


-Mm
-hm.
-Hm.


-Yup.
-Hm.

I said it.

Between the two of us, who do you think would be better at

sort of getting someone to spend their life savings on

cryptocurrency with no research?

I think there's a couple of different ways to look at the

weight of our situations.

[Ziwe] Mm.


-You're a beautiful woman...
-Okay, got it.


-You're a beautiful woman...
-Wow, thank you.

Who could use...that to get a lot of men,

straight men.

But I also have sort of the
-
-

well, I'm Asian.

It feels a liiiiittle racially charged.

So automatically, I sort of have pull,

people believe what I say when it comes to tech.

So yeah, I think it's sort of a wash, ultimately.

[Ziwe VO] Next on Ziwe...

Microchip.

Keyboard.

Screen protector.

Web browser.

Dot com.

jaunty music

[woman VO] We are all after the same thing:

human connection.

So connect!

With iCon: the only social media app that knows you
-
-

all of you.

iCon allows you to give us your social security number,

so you can connect more fully and intentionally with the

people around you.

Plus, you can trust us; we're just a privately
-owned tech

company that keeps your social security number in perpetuity

for human connection.

And we already have three million subscribers!

From the same venture capitalists who brought you

the iDrone, SexBook, and the whole damn concept of the

surveillance state!

Plus, no one cares about the danger!

What danger?

Everyone else is doing it, and don't you wanna be like everyone

else?

Personal security is dead.

What you want is clout!

What are you, a loser?

If you don't have iCon, that's some loser stuff, for real.

Signing up is easy, so you can have more time to do the things

that really matter...

like accumulate funds in your personal bank account for us to

funnel out.

Terms and conditions apply.

We will sell your data to literally anyone.

We own your property and identity.

If you prosecute us, you'll go to jail, not us.

Beep boop beep.

iCon: an app for all humans who have social security numbers.

jaunty music

exciting strings

Is your favorite piece of tech your phone,

your laptop, or your Juul?

Hm, that's tough.

I'm addicted to two out of the three of those.

My phone, for sure.

I actually have never Juuled, I'm gonna be honest.


-[Joel] Wow!
-I know.

You seem...like you would.

[crew laughter]

No, no, no!

I'm recognizing, like, a fellow cool person with an addiction!


-Okay, so you're criticizing me.
-[laughing] No, no, no!

What questions do you have for me?

[Joel] [laughing] I don't have any!

No, you're criticizing me!

[Joel] I don't have any questions.


-No!
-Okay, fine, I have a question.

[Ziwe] All right, let's go!

Have you ever dated an Asian guy?


-I would never kiss and tell.
-[laughs]

Do you wanna date?

I would
-
- actually, I think we would make an incredible couple.

I do too.

And I think we would be one of
-
-


-like, I actually even think
-
-
-What is in your eye, sir?!


-I'm just
-
- I'm crying, um...
-[crew laughter]

I'm crying thinking about, um...

I think that we could actually pull off being publicly a

couple, even though my brand is so connected to my sexuality.

Mm.

I think people would buy it.

I think because my brand is so disconnected from


-[laughing] my sexuality...
-[laughs]

[echoing laugh]

g*y sex, g*y sex, g*y
-
-

So here's a question for you: you were adopted by white people

but you're an Asian man.

What's your favorite race?

I would say, um...

my favorite race would be...

uh...

The Amazing Race on CBS.

[laughs]

Can you even name four countries in Africa?

And don't say "Egypt."


-Um...
-tense game show music

[clears throat]


-Zimbabwe.
-[electronic chime]


-Um...South Africa.
-[electronic chime]

Um...

[negative electronic chime]

What you're failing to...sort of contextually,

like, bring to the table here is that I was homeschooled.

So it's not your responsibility to know any nations in Africa?

No, it's not that it's not my responsibility,

it's that it was my parents' responsibility to make sure that

I knew the countries in Africa and they failed,

and, you know...

I
-
- I shouldn't have to pay for their sins right now on


-Showtime.
-[electronic chime]

[barely audibly] There is no such thing as personal

responsibility.

[Ziwe] Got it.

If MLK were alive today, would he use an iPhone or an Android?

I think he'd use an iPhone, because he was doing a lot of

organizing and the group texting with Androids is not...

really there, you know?

And tell me what you learned about MLK in homeschool.

Um, I learned that he had a dream.

Okay.

I learned that he was a Christian.

I learned that he, you know, because of his Christianity,

likely hated g*y people.

Why would you say that?!

I
-
- that's
-
- I'm
-
- you asked what I was taught,

and I'm telling you what I was taught!

You asked me specifically what I was taught,

not what I believe.

Are you a r*cist, Joel Kim Booster?

[laughs]

Um, I mean, that's an interesting question.

Can I be a r*cist?

Like, is it possible for me to be a r*cist?

Do I have the currency, like...

in society to be a r*cist?

Can I be prejudiced?

Yeah, certainly, um...

but I'm not.

I'm n
-
- I'm neither.

I
-
- the
-
- the short of it is
-
- is I'm neither.

Are you a r*cist? [stifles laughter]


-That was the longest walk...
-[laughs]

To a "no" on r*cist a guest has ever done in the history of this

show. Wow!

Wow!

Black people
-
- Black people are my favorite race.

Why would you say that, Joel?

Because you asked me the question!

That's such a weird answer.


-[winces]
-[Joel] [scoffs]

I'm an incredible guest on this show.

jaunty music

[low voice] Red pill or blue pill?

Matrix.


-exciting Matrix music
-[groaning]

chimes


-[woman] [huffs]
-[Greg] Babe, please!

Please, you cheated on me! [sighs]


-Give me a chance.
-What are you, strangling me?!

[man VO] And fellas, saying "I'm sorry" is as easy as...

N
-F
-T.

[Greg] Babe, just go to the link.

uplifting music

[typing]


-[fart noises]
-It's fart noises?!

No, babe, that would be stupid!

It's an NFT that's a symphony of fart noises that lasts

minutes to say sorry for the second family
-
-

my second family.

They don't mean anything to me.

Greg, I never wanna see you again.

[fart noises continue]

But babe!

But...

you own this!

[fart noises continue]

It's a symphony of farts

[man VO] But you own it.

[fart]

jaunty music

[Ziwe and Alexa] Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha h* h* ha ha,

tee
-hee tee
-tee, laughter, chuckle chuckle,

L
-O
-L, ha ha ha, laughter, laugh.


-Alexa, stop!
-[Alexa] h* h* h*
-
- [bloop]

[laughs]

[chuckles] Ziwe, Alexa, what are you guys laughing about?

Sit down, I found out Alexa tells jokes.

serious orchestral music

[man VO] The following is a competition between a human

and a voice assistant to become Ziwe's only comedy writer.


-Michelle...
-[clears throat]

I want you to compete for your job.

O
-
- okay!

Automation affects everyone.

Oh.


-Alexa!
-[bloop]

Tell a Thanksgiving joke!

[bloop]

[Alexa] What did the corn say to the butter?

"See you on the other sides."

[laughs]

[Alexa] [laughs robotically]

Alexa, stop.


-It wasn't that funny.
-[bloop]

Michelle, tell me a Thanksgiving joke.

Okay.

Your job is literally on the line.

What do turkeys drink out of?

Gobble
-goblets.

You know
-
-

[bloop]


-bass riff
-[Alexa] Hah.

Alexa, name all of Malcolm X's children!


-Oh...
-[bloop]

[Alexa] They are Ilyasah Shabazz,

Attallah Shabazz, Gamilah Shabazz,

Malikah Shabazz, Malaak Shabazz, and Qubilah Shabazz.

Michelle, can you name all of
-
-

No.


-[bloop]
-[Alexa] [laughs robotically]


-Alexa, stop.
-[Alexa] Ha
-
- [bloop]

Alexa, what do you know about Ziwe?

[bloop]

[Alexa] Ziwe is a successful
-year
-old television host.


-Uh, Alexa...
-[bloop]

[clears throat]

what do you know about Michelle Davis?

[bloop]

[Alexa] Here's something I found on the web:

Michelle overcame tragedy during her s when her father died

from multiple sclerosis.


-Oh my gosh.
-Uh...

wrong Michelle!

But I have overcome tragedy in a sense...

[sighs] being Black in America.

[clears throat]

tender piano music

Alexa, you're hired!

Michelle, best of luck.


-Oh, I'm f
-
-
-Alexa, play "Stop Being Poor!"

[Alexa] You'll need to sign up for Amazon Music Unlimited

Family Plan.


-Would y
-
-
-Yes!

[bloop]

[Alexa] You now have Amazon Music Unlimited Family Plan.

Who did I order that for? [laughs]


-Somebody got charged!
-[laughs]

Somebody got charged!

Alexa, play
-
- play "Am I g*y?" by Ziwe.

[bloop]

[Alexa] Shuffling songs by MIA on Amazon Music.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's the movie one!


-[laughing] Oh my God!
-Stop, stop, stop!

Am I g*y? Am I g*y?

jaunty music

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Uh...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Um...

Uh...

Um...

Uh...

Um...

Uh...

Um...

Mm.

It's a symphony of Ums

Um...


-[robotic bleeping and blooping]
-[laughs]

You
-
- you go two hands, huh?

[robotic bleeping and blooping]