02x05 - The Hamburger Hamlet

[bunniefuu]

[reporters chattering]

- [camera shutters snapping]
- [reporters shouting]

Reporter 1: Do you care to
comment on Paul Westhead?

Reporter 2: Dr. Buss...

Reporter 3: What are you
gonna do about Westhead?

Reporter 4: Are
you trading Magic?

Reporter 5: Who's it gonna be?

[chatter continues]

[lighter clicks]

Eddie Jordan: Yo, Riles!

Talk to us, baby!

- Man, what's really real?
- Stop worrying about things.

- Nah, there's no problem.
- Norm Nixon: Hey, all I know is that

this team ain't big enough
for the both of them.

-Somebody gotta go. So, is it Romeo or Juliet?
-Guys...

f*ck' cut it out, alright?

Alright, couple days, this
thing's gonna blow over.

I don't know,
Riles, I don't know.

Holy sh*t.

There's a chill in the
air, huh, Mikey? [chuckles]

Hey? What's the story? Huh?

Y-You hear from Sharman?
Hm? You hear from Buss?

Et tu, Pat? I'm disappointed.

Paul, y-you're
not understanding.

You gotta talk to management
before this hits the fan,

- so they hear your side.
- There are no sides.

This is Earvin's
petulance, okay?

And, and he shot
himself in the foot.

Because now Buss either has
to reprimand him publicly,

or give him what he thinks
he wants. So, either way,

this blows over, and we win.

- We win.
- No, it doesn't work like that, Paul.

- [reporters shouting]
- Coach, if Magic gets traded,

- are you gonna be in the hot seat?
- Hot seat?

We just won our fifth
game in a row, fellas.

Reporter: Buss and the
kid seem pretty close.

- Twenty-five million?
- Gentlemen,

we all know Earvin, okay?

For all of his bluster,
he is a sensitive soul.

- [chuckling] Yeah, sensitive.
- With a lot of growing up to do.

He was having a poor game
and he responded emotionally

to the embarrassment
of being taken to task.

I wouldn't read much
more into it than that.

So, that's the reason for the meeting
then, right? Is that... I mean,

you're gonna slap
him on the wrist?

Meeting?

- Reporter: Yeah, the meeting.
- Of course.

-What meeting is that?
-With Buss. We heard he put out the APB.

- Were you not invited?
- The meeting with Buss?

Of course, I was invited!
I'll be there when we land.

[reporters shouting]

Squeezed out? I
don't think it's...

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar:
Excuse us, Gentlemen.

We have a schedule to keep to.

Let's do it, Coach.

[reporters shouting]

[muffled shouting continues]

Thank you, Cap.

Appreciate you, Coach.

- Don't we, fellas?
- Player 1: Yeah, Cap!

- Player 2: Yes, sir.
- Player 3: Whoo!

Reporter: How are you doing?

Are you on the same
page with Kareem?

That's it?

Oh, shh, shh.

[bus engine idling]

Y'all thought I
was backing down?

I meant what I said.

["My Favorite Mutiny"
by The Coup playing]

♪♪

♪ There it is ♪

♪ Yeah, ah, uh ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Okay ♪

♪ Check it out ♪

♪ Death to the pigs is
my basic statement ♪

♪ I spit street stories
'til I taste the pavement ♪

♪ Tryin' to stay out the pen
where we face enslavement ♪

♪ Had a foolproof hustle 'til
they traced the payments ♪

♪ I was grippin' my palm
around some shitty rum ♪

♪ Tryin' to find
psalm number 151 ♪

♪ To forget what I'm owed,
as I clutch the commode ♪

♪ I read "Put down the bottle
and come get the g*n" ♪

♪ Let's get off the chain like
Kunta Kinte with a MAC-10 ♪

♪ They want us gone like
a dollar in a crack den ♪

♪ Steadily subtractin'
seeds and stems ♪

♪ Mind cloudy through
the wheeze and phlegm ♪

♪ Numbin' my brain off of
that and the Jesus hymns ♪

♪ If we waiting for the time
to fight, these is thems ♪

♪ Tellin' us to relax
while they ease it in ♪

♪ We gettin greased again ♪

♪ The truth I
write is so cold ♪

♪ It'd freeze my pen ♪

♪ I'm Boots Riley it's
a pleasure to meet you ♪

♪ Never let they punk
a*s ever defeat you ♪

♪ They got us on the corner
wearin' pleather and see-thru ♪

♪ All y'all's gold mines,
they wanna deplete you ♪

♪ I ain't just finna rap on the
track, I finna clap on 'em back ♪

♪ And it's been
stackin' to that ♪

♪ 500 years before Iceberg
ever leaned back in the 'lac ♪

♪ Before they told Rosa
"Black in the back" ♪

♪ Before the CIA told Ricky
Ross to put crack in a sack ♪

♪ And Gil Scott traded
rappin' for smack ♪

♪ This beat alone should
get platinum plaques ♪

♪ I'd rather see a million
of us ecstatic to scrap ♪

♪ 'Cause if we bappin' 'em
back we automatically stack ♪

[vocalizing]

[turntable scratching]

I give that kid
more money than God,

and he turns around and
stabs me in the back!

Yeah, well, it ain't all him,
you know. It's Shakespeare, too.

I mean, I been
tryin' to tell you.

- Bill Sharman: [clears throat] Jerry...
- What? I mean, come on.

The cat's out of the
f*ck' bag, Bill.

What the f*ck is it
with me and coaches?

Jerry West: Yeah, well,

we ain't sayin' Johnson's
in the right, okay?

But he ain't wrong either.

I mean, we know Westhead
was never the man.

He rode another man's
coaster! Now, that coaster

- is going off the f*ck' rails.
- Jerry Buss: We're not firing Paul.

- Bill: What, you're trading Magic?
- Hell no!

Then numbnuts?

We're not firing another
f*cking coach, guys!

- Bill: I get it, I get it.
- Okay, yeah.

You bet big on both of them.

It's gonna be uncomfortable

whichever way you go,

but if Magic means
what he says...

I'm gonna talk to him.
He got a little hot.

He lost his temper, but he's
gonna come to his senses.

- Bill: And if he can't?
- Jerry West: Or won't?

I want him in my office

as soon as that plane
touches the f*cking ground.

♪♪

Just over there.

Paul Westhead: Hark!

What light at
yonder table breaks?

- Dad?
- Paul?

What are you doing here?

- Hi.
- Paul: Came from the airport.

It's not very often our
daughter lets herself be seen

with her old man in public.

- Hi.
- Hi.

S-So everything's
okay? With Magic?

- Everything is fine.
- You talked to him?

Not yet.

Hey, in my line of work,
this kind of thing happens.

Happens all the time, and
you just don't hear about it.

Th-This one hit the papers.

Who wants chicken fried steak?

Dad, you need to go.

Cassie Westhead: Honey, let
your father get some food.

No! He needs to
deal with this! Mom,

Magic is more famous than
Rick Springfield. Uh...

- Paul: Okay.
- This is all over the news.

Two months of college,

she already knows
everything, apparently.

Okay, hey, if I must
account for my every move,

I phoned from the airport.
My appointment was delayed.

- With Buss?
- Yes, with Buss.

- Garcon!
- [snapping fingers]

Sweetheart. Hey, look at me.

They don't pay me
what they pay me

just to kick me
to the curb, okay?

This will all get sorted out.

Monica Westhead: Dad.

Yes.

You're gonna get fired.

[fork clatters]

Waiter: Welcome to the Hamlet.

He's gonna have the chicken.

[tense music playing]

Dr. Buss is in a meeting.

With who?

- I'm not at liberty to say.
- [Paul scoffs]

Can you just let
him know I'm here?

He said no interruptions.

♪♪

I'll be in my office.

Fellas, I'll lay you 10-to-1
he doesn't last a day!

Oh. Hi, Paul.

Bill: Hey, Paul. You're, uh...

- You're early.
- Am I?

[Bill clears throat]

[weak laugh]

[sighs] Yeah, I thought, I
thought I would come down

- so we could all, uh, so we could all powwow.
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.

About this bee in
Magic's bonnet,

make sure we're all
singing the same tune.

Uh, the boss is singing
solo on this one.

He's sittin' down with
Earvin any minute now.

- [clears throat] Mm-hmm.
- Of course, he is.

Yeah. Any idea what
he's gonna say?

I know as much as you do, Paul.

We'll get with you in
a couple hours, okay?

[pats shoulder]

♪♪

- [soft knocking]
- Yeah!

[door opens]

- Hey.
- We, uh, came through the back.

- Jerry Buss: Good.
- Lon Rosen: Nobody saw us.

- Jerry Buss: Beat it, Lon.
- Lon: Yeah.

[door closes]

[Jerry Buss sighs]

- [Magic scoffs]
- Earvin... [sighs]

- You should've come to me.
- Earvin "Magic" Johnson: Mm.

I did. You played me.

We said we're gonna
keep talking. We agreed.

Mm... You said that.

You're supposed to be
my partner, Earvin.

Yeah. Your silent partner.

Just do as he's told.

Shut up and ball.

Paul the real partner, though.

Yeah. Get his way,

but ain't the one that
brought us a title.

I will talk to him. Okay?

And we are going to make
this right. In the meantime,

you're gonna put
out a statement.

"What was said was in
the heat of competition.

"Things got outta
hand. I regret it.

I wanna stay a Laker."

And I'm gonna stand
right beside you

and say I forgive you

- and I still love you like a son.
- Magic: Mm.

Mm-hmm...

Then you ain't hearing me.

I'm done playin' for
that m*therf*cker.

The rest be what it is.

- So what you want?
- I want you to cash

your big f*cking
check and play nice!

Let me ask you something.

You think your father
would be pouting like this?

A man that worked his whole life

for a fraction of
what I'm giving you.

- The f*ck you gotta bring my father into this for?
- Well?!

Talk about your own
f*cked-up family!

'Cause you too busy sticking
your d*ck in anything that move!

- Talking about a son!
- You're a 20-year-old

that I made a multi-millionaire!

- Have some respect!
- And I earned that sh*t!

It wasn't 'cause you love me!

Like a father!

It's 'cause I'm the best player
on this m*therf*cking team!

That's the only reason why we
standin' here talkin' right now!

So let's talk!

Westhead got us out there doing
elementary school bullshit.

We barely beating teams
that we could be dominating!

You told me being a leader
came with this money, right?

Yeah?

Then why the f*ck you ain't
do sh*t when I came to you!?

Bet you hear me now!

[slams door]

♪♪

- [door opens]
- Paul: Earvin.

[sighs]

There are moments in life
when lessons are learned.

I want you to know...

I still believe in you.

How 'bout that.

Mary Lou: Dr. Buss
will see you now.

[lighter clicks]

[shuts door]

- [knocking]
- [weak laugh]

Paul: Busy morning,
I'm guessing.

[Paul chuckles]

[sighs]

If you're wondering
what I'm thinking, uh...

I say we give this
a couple days.

We let things simmer down.
We let cooler heads prevail.

We're lettin' you go, Paul.

Paul: I don't think
that's a good idea.

You said that this was my team.

So I'm just doing what
you empowered me to do.

And we came up
with a way to win!

I did! I came up with it!

Look, I understand. I
understand. You love Magic.

But it takes a team to win.

It's a team you're
no longer a part of.

You're making a big mistake!

I understand that you
have the right to fire me!

I really do! I understand
that because you're the boss.

But, he cannot!

He is just a player.

And what you're doing right now

is you're giving him power
above the greater whole.

This is his handiwork.
He is forcing your hand.

Me.

This is me, Paul.

This is my team.

- You failed.
- I failed?

You lost in the first round.

I won a f*cking championship.

I appreciate your contribution.

Oh, f*ck!

Thank you. Thank you so much.

[Paul clears throat]

I'ma... I have one question.

Who's it gonna be?

Me? Oh, f*ck no! No!

No! It's a big f*cking
N-O! Hell, no! No.

- Bill: Jerry...
- No, I ain't f*ck' doin' it, Bill, you m*therf*cker.

Come on! I got a whole
f*ck' brigade of men!

Qualified men who
want the f*ck' job!

Jerry Buss: Jerry, we've
been down that road before.

Hell, I've been down
'em all. Alright?

They get shot, they fall
off their f*cking bikes,

they choke in the first round,
and they all lead back to you!

Now, I'm not religious,

but I think God might be
trying to tell you something!

Well, God ain't my
f*cking friend. Okay? No.

Bill: Think of
the team, Jerry.

- Can't hear you, Bill.
- We're in the middle

of a season. We
need continuity.

- Jerry West: No.
- Jerry.

How are you gonna feel

watching the Celtics
steal another trophy?

You are a mean m*therf*cker.
That's a low blow.

Well, that's where
this is headed.

And you know it.

Now, we can get this
monkey off our back.

Once and for all!

Your team needs you!

- Oh, ple... No! Don't do that!
- I need you.

Jerry, I'm f*cking begging you.

And I'm not asking for
forever, by the way,

but we have a game tomorrow!

And your Los Angeles Lakers
need a f*ck' coach.

♪♪

Hey!

It's a big day.

Brass is in town, kiddo.

Big team needs a new manager.

Your old man is goin'
back to the big show.

[slurps]

- [can clatters]
- f*ck! f*ck.

Paul: Hey, Pat.

You know, I was, uh...

I was thinking about the
day my dad got fired.

Spent his life chasing that gig.

Hell of a coach, too.

Look where it got him.

[Pat sighs]

f*ck. [sighs]

Paul: They can you, too?

Yeah. Bill called.
[clears throat]

He said they wanted to see me.

[heavy sigh]

We had a hell of a run.

Yeah. Better than most.

♪♪

You saw this coming, didn't you?

Why didn't you stop me?

[exhales]

[clears throat] Pat.

[sighs]

I am so sorry that I
screwed up your shot.

Not your fault.

- [Paul laughs]
- Okay. It is.

- [softly] Yeah.
- But, uh...

You gave it to me, too, so...

thank you, Paul.

Yep.

Yep.

[Pat clears throat]

♪♪

[Pat sighs]

- [elevator dings]
- You got options...

- [mumbling]
- [office chatter]

- positive solution.
- Bill: There he is.

- Pat: Hey. Oh, hey. Hey.
- There you are! Come on!

This way. Come on. Come on.

♪♪

Thought we were seeing Buss.

We are.

What is this, huh?

-Is it a gangland hit? Where are you taking me?
-No, no, no.

Buss wants to do it
in the press room.

What? No, no.
You're kidding me.

No, he's gonna just
trot me out there

- and fire me in front of everyone?
- You're stayin' on.

- I am?
- Yeah!

- In what capacity?
- The coaching kind.

- Yeah, we're working out the details.
- Me?!

- He's real excited.
- Him?!

Oh, sh*t. Jesus,
Jerry. Jerry, Jesus!

Pat, Pat, Pat! Don't jack
me off just yet, okay?

It's a crap job waitin'
for the axe to fall.

Yeah, we got feelers out
for a permanent replacement,

- so you have a few games to show us what you can do.
- Okay, you got it.

- Hey!
- Okay. You got your guy?

Our guy. The guy. I'm
just the other guy.

You're the guy accountable.

- Which one of us is...
- Him! - You!

- The guy?
- Lon: Guys?

- Uh, press is getting a little restless.
- Okay.

- [claps hands]
- Let's go.

Jerry West: Guess we're all
just the f*ck' g*dd*mn guy.

- Bill: f*ck that, huh?
- Uh, hey, Bill?

Hey. I'm confused.
A-Am I the coach?

Guess we'll find out. Come on.

- [reporters shouting]
- [camera shutters snapping]

Jerry Buss: I'm gonna
make a statement,

and I need your attention.

- [shouting quiets]
- So, uh...

- [camera shutters snapping]
- As some of you may have heard,

Paul Westhead is no longer
head coach for the Lakers.

[reporters shouting]

I-I have appointed Jerry West

as offensive captain
for the team,

and his duties will
begin immediately.

Doctor, what is an
offensive captain?

Reporter: What does that mean?

He'll be coaching, uh,
primarily on offense.

- So who's the defense?
- What is this, football?

- [laughter] - Is there
a special teams coach?

- Jerry Buss: f*ck you, Fred.
- [laughter]

What about Pat Riley?

Pat Riley will stay on as coach.

- Reporter 2: Does that mean head coach?
- No.

- Then what is he?
- Who's the head coach?

Reporter 3: What does
that mean? I'm confused.

You know, I...

I specifically did not, uh...

make someone head coach

and make someone
else assistant coach.

Reporter 4: Why?

I did it just as I...

just as I just announced,
i-intentionally.

Reporter 5: So are
they co-coaches?

[reporters clamoring]

Uh...

You know, I feel that Pat is
capable of running the team.

I wanna say that. Uh...

I just felt, however,
that we needed

a new offensive coach.

I asked Jerry to
take on that role,

and...

fortunately...

Jerry said yes. He
agreed, so, uh...

- [reporters shouting]
- Okay. Thank you.

- Thank you, Jeff.
- Dr. Buss, there's a game tomorrow night.

That game will end.

Will both coaches come
out and talk to us?

Well, that is something
we have discussed.

I mean, who picks
the starting lineup?

Reporter 6: Yeah, exactly.

Well, generally in basketball,

it's the coach.

[laughter]

Th-That's one of those questions
that, uh, is gonna be revealed to us

as we move forward.

Uh, the delineation
of specific duties

is gonna be something that
is gonna require some,

you know...

live-and-learn type of
scenarios, et cetera, et cetera.

You know, a-at this moment, I
think it's probably best for,

for Jerry to say a few
words. So, uh, Jerry West,

why don't you talk, uh, give
us some more insights on this.

- Jerry West, everybody.
- [reporters shouting]

- [camera shutters snapping]
- Go straighten this sh*t out!

[mouthing]

[shouting continues]

Y-You look forward to
coaching again, Jer?

[echoing] Come on! Come on!

Reporter 7: Do you miss
working with the players?

Jesus f*ck' Christ!

Jerry, have you
thought about the fact

that the Celtics
are reigning champs?

And are you looking forward
to another finals re...

- f*ck!
- [echoing bang]

[camera shutters snap]

Uh, [clears throat] I'm gonna... I'm
gon'... [clears throat] I'm gonna...

I'd like to clear up
one small matter first.

Okay?

I will be working for Pat Riley.

I-Is that with or for?

That's a... That's with and for.

h*-h*-h*-Hopefully,

that won't be too long-range.

Reporter 8: Meaning?
Meaning what?

- Pat?
- [reporters shouting]

[camera shutters snapping]

[shouting continues]

Alright, hold on, hold
on, hold on. I can't...

Reporter 9: Pat! Pat,
will you take questions?

Uh, yeah, I have
a few of my own,

- but yeah, sure.
- [laughter]

Reporter 10: Have you
thought about any assistants?

Assistant? Uh...

I'm just thinking
about lunch, you know.

- [laughter]
- Look, uh...

It's not been a
very fun day for me.

Paul is a friend.

And, uh...

You know, sometimes it takes
a left hook to get you going.

And I think, uh, we've all
been dealt that kind of blow.

- Reporter: So, in-in your eyes, are you making the decisions?
- Reporter 2: Would you say

you're head coach, interim
coach, or assistant coach?

- Reporter 3: Pat, are you the head coach?
- You're the coach.

And the only f*ck' coach.

Hey! Hey, Pat! Hey, Pat! You gonna
keep combing your hair all funny?

- [laughs] Why, you like it?
- [laughter]

Jerry Buss: That was
great. Thank you, guys!

-We'll talk some more! We'll talk some more!
-[reporters shouting]

[distant traffic noise]

- [indistinct chatter]
- [office phones ringing]

Riles!

Huh? Oh! f*ck' damn!

Look at you, huh?

A head coach, if
ever I've seen one.

Okay.

- Now, remember what I said.
- What's that?

I'll be there, on the bench.

I'll work with you in
case you want my advice,

but that's it.
That's all. Okay?

- Appreciate it.
- A Tonto to your Ranger.

Okay, so don't be gettin'
ejected from no games...

- Okay.
- 'cause guess who won't be there?

Old West, that's who.

Let 'em know where we are,
fellas! We're at the Forum!

We're at home! Come on! Where
are you? Coop! Coop, screens!

I want you to focus on 'em!
Fight f*ck' through 'em!

You find your man!
You find your man!

Wilkes! I don't wanna see that
f*ck' sh*t from last week.

- You be on your toes!
- Yes.

Or you'll be on the f*ck'
bench with me, you got it?

Cap!

♪♪

You have a good game, okay?

What the f*ck you doin' back
here lookin' mousey for, Riles?

Get in there! Don't be afraid
to light these f*ck up.

Let 'em know who's boss!
Okay? Especially Johnson.

At the right moment,
you find him,

you take him aside,
you let him know

you're not gonna be
his whipping boy, okay?

- Like you know who.
- You sure about that?

- What?
- I'm kidding. I'm just yours.

Come on. Hey, guys!
Come on! Bring it in!

- [clapping] - Bring it in, let's
go, let's go, let's go, let's go.

This is a special moment, right?
I want you to look me in the eyes.

You know me, and I know you.

And we all know how this
team plays its best.

Free and easy. Loose, fun.

I want everyone to
just go out there

-and wing it. Just like I am, alright?
-[excited murmuring]

Let's just go have some
fun and wing it, alright?

Wing it on three. Let's go.

- One, two, three.
- All: Wing it!

[applause, cheering]

It's showtime, baby! Let's go!

[cheering]

Let's take it out there!
Dominate that f*ck' paint!

Let's go! Come on,
come on, come on!

Larry McKay [on speaker]: Ladies and
gentlemen, your Los Angeles Lakers!

- [muted applause]
- [crowd booing]

Fan 1: You suck, Magic!

[booing, jeering]

Fan 2: 25 million
dollar crybaby!

Fan 3: Magic sucks!

Fan 4: Boo for 32!

Hey, f*ck 'em.

Come on, brother. Let's
show 'em what we can do.

[booing continues]

["Shadow Dancing" by
Andy Gibb playing]

Announcer [on radio]: Big
win for the Lakers tonight.

Magic Johnson was dazzling,

but you wouldn't know it
from the crowd's response.

I can't believe it. A
winning coach is fired

because an overpaid,
spoiled-rotten superstar

has a temper tantrum?

Magic Johnson does
perform magic tricks.

- [dog panting]
- He makes coaches disappear.

Announcer [on radio]: Who's supposed to
keep this kid in line now? Pat Riley?

- Magic: You got it, Riles.
- Guys! f*ck.

Announcer [on radio]: You see Kareem
out there last night? Checked out.

- [reporters shouting]
- [camera shutters snapping]

Jim Murray:
Un-American. Bolshevik.

Jerry Buss, you, sir,
are an unfit owner,

a disgrace to sports,

and you deserve everything
you got coming to you.

♪ ...there's only you and I ♪

♪ There ain't nothing come
between us in the end ♪

f*ck!

Why are you still
reading that sh*t?

It's not sh*t.
It's Jim Murray.

Honey Kaplan: He
sounds like a sh*t.

He's one of the most respected
writers in the country.

Everybody reads him.

You think he's right?

No, I don't think he's right.

I did what I had to
do. I had no choice.

But he's calling
me a f*cking clown!

Okay, well, so what did he
call you last year, Buss?

A genius? It's just...

It's my name! Okay?

f*ck. [sighs]

Goddammit.

Don't be mad. [sighs]

- I didn't ask for this engagement ring.
- I'm sorry.

- I'm sorry.
- If you want me to wear it,

then I need you to
remember that all of

- this sh*t...
- [papers rustling]

isn't real.

And it doesn't matter.

[softly] I love you.

- I'm sorry.
- It's okay.

[sighs]

[exhales sharply] Damn.

Deejay [on speakers]: Everybody
out there, strap your skates on

and get out there.
It's all-skate!

♪ Let's groove tonight ♪

Jerry Buss: Oh,
Captain, my Captain!

- Cheryl Pistono: Hi, Doctor!
- Honey [laughing]: Hi!

Oh, my God! That rock!

- Yeah.
- Come on, baby.

He promises I can sell it

after the wedding and give
the money to the ANC, right?

Alright, you revolutionaries,
you promenade.

Captain's on my dance card!

Oh God. I love coming here.

♪ It's alright, alright ♪

You're pretty nimble
on those puppies!

♪ Let this groove... ♪

Yeah. A little balance, a
little boogie, am I right?

♪ Alright, alright ♪

I don't wanna let you go.

You fired my coach.

Well, my coach, and it
was a difficult decision.

But all my advisers
were unanimous, so...

Including Earvin?

♪ All night ♪

Look, Kareem.

I know I stepped on some
toes with Earvin's deal.

Now, I'm sorry about that. I
coulda handled that rollout

a lot better in particular.

What can I say? The
kid's like a son to me!

Kareem, you're the
father of this team.

That's why I wanna
roll you outta here

as the highest-paid
man in sports.

Two and a half million
plus access to the Forum.

You can book any act you
want, and you keep the gate.

That's gonna net you at least
another three million right there.

Nobody's got that! Not
Earvin, not nobody!

You misunderstood me.

You think I envy him.

Oh, on the contrary.

I'm sure you got him
alone just like this.

Just a kid with a couple
of years of college

- against a seasoned businessman.
- Oh, come on, now.

That's not fair.
He came to me.

And you took advantage.

- He's naive.
- Well, I'm giving him 25 million dollars.

[scoffs] Giving?

You're giving him
a life sentence.

And in five years,
you and I both know

that'll be an average
salary. In 10 years,

he'll be feeling like a fool.

My problem is with you.

The selfishness,
the superficiality.

I honestly wondered
what was keeping me

from signing that extension.

So, thank you 'cause now I know.

It's you.

♪ Stand up, alright ♪

♪ Let this groove ♪

♪ Get you to move... ♪

Hey! You're blocking me in.

I know! I wanted to
talk to you! Come here.

- Jeanie Buss: No...
- [blender whirring]

Could you move your car?
I gotta get to work!

[blender stops]

Honey: I wanted to ask you

if you wouldn't mind

going easy on your
father. He's...

under so much
pressure right now.

I think what he needs most...

is his two favorite
girls' love and support.

- Have some.
- No, thank you.

Everything that's
going on with the team,

all the mishegoss, the whole
coaching thing, it's...

It's really taking
a toll on him.

Look, I know it must feel
like I came out of nowhere.

You walk through the door,
she's playing Monopoly...

I get it.

I really, really
get it, Jean-bean.

I want you to feel like...

you can come to me
any time you want.

I'm marrying your father.

I know. I picked out the ring.

Now can you move your
car? I gotta get to work!

♪♪

Hey, can you tell
your girlfriend...

Oh, hey. Where's my dad?

They said he wasn't coming in,

so we was just using his office.

Hey! Is this the new campaign?

I'm feelin' 7-Up already.

[weak laugh] It was gonna be.

Now, they all "wait and see."

Eh, 7-Up sucks anyways.

My own fault, though.
Shoulda let sh*t be.

We was winning.
Don't gotta be fun.

Dude gave me all
the money there is,

- and I go smack him upside the head with it.
- [giggles] You're my hero.

I just mean 'cause you...

stood up to him.

You know?

Just glad somebody
f*cking did for once.

[slight chuckle]

And he can't do
anything about it.

He can't bully you,
can't beat you down.

I'm sure he tried to guilt you.

- Oh, yeah. He tried. [laughs]
- [Jeanie giggles]

- Did do that.
- But all his tricks fell flat.

[sighs]

Thank you.

♪♪

[soft laugh]

You're welcome.

Announcer [on radio]: Lakers drop
their third of the last four games.

I said it when it happened.

It was a bad decision
to can Westhead.

Not 'cause he was so great,

but you gotta do it
with a plan in mind.

This Laker organization looks
like amateur hour right now.

Here they go from a
million-dollar professor

who doesn't have an answer, to a
sidekick who everybody likes...

- sh*t!
- Chick Hearn: Yep.

- [laughs] That's right.
- Jerry West: Yep. - [Bill coughs]

The f*cking bloom is well
and truly off the rose.

Well, don't look at me,
fellas. I love Patricia,

- but, uh...
- But what?

The honeymoon's
over, right, Billy?

I mean, look, these men
need a firm hand, you know?

- They don't need a bosom, buddy.
- That's what I f*ck' told him.

- I said, Pat, put your foot up some f*ck' a*s.
- [Bill coughing]

- That's right.
- Like you did in your f*ck' playing days.

- Chick: That's right!
- Jerry West: I mean, hell, back then,

he'd fight you over the
drop of a f*ck' hat.

-But not this Pat. Oh, f*cking no. No.
-[Bill coughing]

- He wants to earn the respect with positive vibes.
- [Bill grunting]

I mean, that wife of his,
this frou-frou horseshit.

Chick: Joining
hands to get along.

- g*dd*mn flower people run this world now.
- [racking cough]

- Jerry West: Not his f*cking nature.
- Well, I could've told you that

from his sissy little voice.

Well, he's never been in a position
like this before, you know,

- out the front of something.
- [Bill continues coughing]

I mean, Bill, I'm just for one am glad
that this is gonna be your call...

- Chick: Billy?
- Bill!

Jesus Christ.

Oh, my God!

[Bill groaning]

- Chris Riley: Hey!
- Hey.

I thought you were
meeting with Bill.

Pat: He f*cking
fried his vocal cord.

Some kind of polyps
or something.

He's in the hospital.
Guy lost his voice.

Wow.

- Crazy. You know?
- [opens drawer]

- f*ck.
- [throws cigarettes]

Guy's about to fire me,
God strikes him mute.

You don't know that.

This is it, Chris.

I know this is it.

A hundred thousand moments had
to break my way to get me here.

Top of the mountain.

Now, I got one losing streak,
and they're gonna push me off.

I don't know how
anybody lives like this.

- You gotta stay positive.
- Yeah, I'm trying. I'm trying.

That's all I do with the guys.

Shower 'em with encouragement.

Empower.

All the things you talk about.

And when I need them to listen,

they smile,

and they muss me on the head,

and they go do what
the f*ck they wanna do.

- Like another f*ck' Paul.
- No. They know you better than that.

Sure. Yeah, no. They like me,

but they don't respect me!

They don't.

I swear...

man, for the first
time in my life,

I look in the mirror,

and I wish I was my father.

Someone they would fear.

Your father failed
because of who he was.

He thought force was the
answer for everything,

yelling and hitting

when the words wouldn't come.

And you sat there
as a little boy,

wishing he could be the
man that you are now.

Yeah, well...

He had his 12 at-bats.

Now I get mine.

I'm doing great, by the
way. Thank you for asking.

Sorry, Chris.

[Chris scoffs]

[Jerry Buss sighs]

[door opens]

- Hey.
- Hey. [clears throat]

So... [clears throat]

Bill wants to cut bait.

I won't bother
sitting down then.

He wants me to make a change
while there's still time

to get the new guy up to speed.

I see.

But here's the thing, Pat.

I'm f*cking sick of this sh*t.

All of this.

I want some stability.

I want something
permanent. I need that.

So you tell me.

Do you want to coach my team?

Yes. [laughs]

Hell yes. Are you
kidding me? Absolutely!

So coach my f*cking team.

Right. [clears throat]

- Figure it out.
- Yep.

[quietly] f*ck yeah.

Chick: And after an ugly
loss at Golden State

and an even uglier
one in the Big Apple,

[on radio] the Lakers limp
into our nation's capital,


Jerry West: Fifteen minutes,
Riles! Let's get it goin', huh?

Eddie: Riles, man,
that's a bad-a*s shirt!

Jim Brewer: Ooh,
Riles! Fly like that,

y'all be coming out
with us tonight.

Yo. Silk ain't helping
out on defense.

Can you talk to
him? Thanks, Riles.

[pats back]

Coop keeps drawing
his defenders on me.

Would you tell him to
clear out? Thanks, Riles.

- [pats back] - Cap's big
a*s needs to get open.

- Thanks, Riles.
- Storm needs to cut out the bullshit and find me.

- [patting]
- Make it happen.

So I'ma break at 10,
come back at quarter,

- play the rest. Cool? Cool.
- Mark Landsberger: Hey, Riles.

Me and the other
guys are gonna grab

a couple beers after the game.

I hear the strip clubs
got this sister...

[indistinct chatter]

[muffled] What I'm trying to say
is we ain't usin' the dudes right.

Okay, we need to get
him into the post...

Hey, hey, hey. Listen up now.

[overlapping chatter]

[Riley inaudibly mouthing]

[punching hand]

- [chatter continues]
- Listen up, now!

[shouts]

[items clatter]

f*ck! Will you
shut the f*ck up!

[fluorescent lights buzzing]

All of you!

Nobody f*cking
listens! Sit down!

- Now you're gonna listen!
- [lighter clicks]

You know what you're doing?

- [drops lighter]
- Do you?

Bitching, crying,
pointing fingers.

sh*t...

f*cking champions my a*s.

You know why you lost last year?

'Cause of this sh*t!
'Cause you start

f*cking popping off
about each other. Coop!

You sniping at Jamaal?

What's your excuse for
playing like a fried turd? Hm?

I don't know where you got
the idea you're a star.

- You're not.
- Norm: I know that's right.

What? You think
you're a big man?

So what? You made an
all-star team. Whoopee.

You haven't played hard since.

What, you take the
rest of the season off?

Hm? You out there chasing
tail? How's that going for you?

Riles, I hurt my knee.

You b*tch again about Kareem,
you're done! You hear me?

That goes for all of you.

Well said.

Cap. Where you been?

Everybody's asking when
you're gonna retire.

They're all trying to
guess. I'll tell you when.

It was two months ago.

[players murmur]

Shut up! Don't you show
me those f*cking teeth.

- You think I'm afraid of you?
- Huh?

Nah, Riles, it ain't
even like that.

There's no press here. Come
on, let's tell it like it is.

So f*cking afraid
you lost a step,

you pinned it on your
coach. I watched you.

You turned on him. Now, this
whole team is turning on itself!

If you wanna win...

you gotta be like this!

Tight!

Anyone has anything to say,
it gets said face-to-face.

Man-to-man.

♪♪

Almost forgot. McAdoo, you're
outta the starting line-up.

-[snap fingers] -Rambis.
Wake up. You're in.

Jerry West: The hippie?
Pat! Pat. Riles, Riles.

I love the speech,
but the Doo is due,

- You can't put him on the bench.
- Pat: I just did.

- And I'm taking you off.
- Riles...

No more of this Riles sh*t!

It's Coach.

♪♪

Alright, fellas. Let's
go play this game.

Let's go!

[clapping, chatter]

Players: Let's do it!

Magic: Coach on three.

- Player 1: Come on.
- Player 2: Let's go, Coach.

On three. One, two, three.

Players: Coach!
Come on. Get it.

Jerry West: Here we
go. Come on. Come on!

- Alright, Cap.
- Let me see it.

Looks broke. I'll get the ice.

Hey. Don't you f*cking dare.

["Grease" by Frankie
Valli playing]

[crowd cheering]

[cheering]

♪ We got a lovin' thing ♪

I don't give a f*ck!
We're gonna get past them!

I want you to step on
their f*cking necks!

Get in their f*cking
heads! This is showtime!

- One, two, three!
- Players: Showtime! Let's go!

♪ That we can be who we are ♪

Chick: You know you're in
Hollywood when even the coach

is leading man material.

Keith Erickson: Chick, it looks
like Dyan Cannon agrees with you.

- [crowd cheering]
- Pat: It's showtime!

♪♪

[grunts]

[crowd shouting]

Chick: Hey, there's that smile,
folks. Ever since breaking out

and putting up 40 against
his hometown Pistons,

this kid has shown no
signs of slowing down.

Pat: Magic, you know what
you can do. You go out there,

- and you f*cking prove that.
- Magic: I got you.

Pat: Don't be
afraid to play hard!

Do not give a sh*t! You
gotta foul? You foul!

You get out there and
you f*cking show that.

They're here to see you!

♪ Grease is the word, is
the word, is the word... ♪

Frank Mariani: Okay. World!

Meet Mr. and Mrs. Jerry Buss!

- [camera shutters snapping]
- [clapping, cheering]

It's Doctor, Frank!

Frank: Just break
the f*cking cup!

- [glass breaks]
- [cheering]

Mazel tov!

- [cheering] - Jerry
Buss: Thanks, everybody.

Thank you, Pat. Let's get
something to drink now, huh?

♪♪

[chatter continues]

d*ck Stockton [on
TV]: Oh! Slam dunk,

Dr. Julius Erving,

and that puts this
one out of reach.

Folks hoping for a
Boston-LA matchup

have to wait another year.

The Sixers are headed once again

to face the Lakers
in the finals.

And these loyal Celtic fans,
here at a sold-out Boston Garden,

- will go home disappointed.
- Fans [chanting]: Beat LA! Beat LA!

d*ck: But hold on, Boston
fans are making noise.

- A chant is building.
- Bill Russell [on TV]: What's that sound, d*ck?

You hear what these
fans are chanting?

- Crowd [chanting]: Beat LA! Beat LA!
- Bill: Beat LA!

d*ck: Well, now, sounds
like the Boston Celtic fans

have a message for
this 76ers team

that's about to eliminate
their own boys from contention.

- You hear that sh*t?
- d*ck: They're about

to face Los Angeles
for all the marbles.

The Boston fans have
really picked a side.

- With gusto!
- Bill: Best fans in the game, d*ck.

Best in the game.

d*ck: That must be music to
your Celtic ears, huh, Bill?

Crowd [chanting]: Beat
LA! Beat LA! Beat LA!

Beat LA! Beat LA!

All: f*ck Boston!

["Keep On Loving You" by
REO Speedwagon playing]

♪ 'Cause it's the only
thing I wanna do ♪

♪ I don't wanna sleep ♪

♪ I just wanna keep
on loving you ♪

♪♪

♪ And I meant
every word I said ♪

♪ When I said
that I loved you ♪

♪ I meant that I
love you forever ♪

♪ And I'm gonna
keep on loving you ♪

♪♪ 'Cause it's the
only thing I wanna do ♪

♪ I don't wanna sleep ♪

♪ I just wanna keep on... ♪