[audience murmuring]
[feedback squealing]
ASTOR: Good evening, everybody.
I'm Astor Grey,
and you guys are in
for a real treat,
because tonight,
for the first time
in front of a live audience,
I will be performing
my one-woman reenactment
of Weekend at Bernie's.
[audience applauding]
["Los Angeles,
I'm Yours" playing]
There is a city by the sea
A gentle company
I don't suppose you want to
And as it tells
its sorry tale
In harrowing detail
Its hollowness
will haunt you
A plaintive melody
Truncated symphony
An ocean's garbled vomit
on the shore
Los Angeles, I'm yours
Los Angeles, I'm yours
Los Angeles, I'm yours
[audience cheering]
Thank you. [Chuckles]
[music playing on phone]
Los Angeles, I'm yours
Los Angeles, I'm yours
[engine humming]
[seagulls squawking]
[phone chimes]
You should absolutely say yes.
Brandyn is so hot,
and he's got
a lot of great connections.
Do you think he messages
a bunch of women
asking them to record
with him, though?
Probably. Who cares?
Okay, make sure
he wears a condom,
and then text me
if it gets too weird.
[grunts] Dude, I don't know.
It just seems crazy.
He's a total stranger.
What if he's, like,
a complete wiener?
He's not a stranger.
He's Brandyn Verge.
-I bet the sex will be great.
-[Astor laughs]
Come on,
you deserve to have fun.
[groans] f*ck.
Okay. Oh, my God,
I'm gonna say yes.
And just pray that
I don't end up
on the next episode
of My Favorite m*rder.
He's not gonna k*ll you.
Besides, he put you
on his social media.
-That is a declaration of love.
-I don't know.
After my video,
he posted a bunch of cats
he wants to adopt,
so... [chuckles]
-That is so sweet.
-I know.
Maybe he wants to adopt you too.
I hope so.
[heartfelt music]
[engine revving]
[sighs] Sorry I'm late.
-God, you look stunning.
-Thank you. [Chuckles]
I think
I'm a little overdressed.
No, I'm... I'm just a slob.
-Nice car.
-Thanks.
You live on a boat?
Yeah, it's tiny,
but it's perfect for me.
Cool.
Um, I got a crazy idea.
What are you doing tomorrow?
I don't know.
What's happening? [Laughs]
Well, I just wanna take you
to the weirdest place on earth.
ASTOR: What,
you wanna go to Disneyland?
[laughs] No, it's a surprise.
You're not gonna m*rder me
and throw my body
in a ditch, are you? [Laughs]
Well, you're not gonna m*rder me
and throw my body
in a ditch, are you?
[laughs] I guess we just
have to trust each other.
Okay, let's go.
[uplifting music]
[engine revving]
[both laughing]
So, I'm so hungover.
Just barfed my brains out.
Couldn't hardly stand.
No passport, by the way.
The lady at the Delta counter,
she's like,
"Sir, I think
you're in the wrong San Juan."
[laughs] You're so stupid.
-Yeah.
-[both laughing]
No offense.
[engine revving]
Come on.
Your first concert
was Willie Nelson?
-Yeah.
-That is so badass.
Wait, how old were you?
Uh, I was, like, eight or nine.
-Okay. Yeah.
-[both chuckling]
Nice.
Okay, so, was Mom
a cowgirl or a pothead?
Mom is a Venice Beach hippie.
-Hmm. Pothead. Got it.
-[both laughing]
I mean, maybe back in the day,
but not anymore.
At least not to my knowledge.
Mm-hmm. Right.
So, what does
Secret Stoner Mom do now?
Mom is a painter.
-You guys close?
-We are, yeah. Um...
she brought me to so many great
concerts when I was a kid,
and she had
this old record player,
and she would basically
give me music history lessons.
I can still picture her just
digging through
these massive stacks.
-Yeah, that's the best.
-Yeah.
Okay, what about Dad?
I never knew my dad, actually.
He... he died surfing
when my mom was,
like, nine months pregnant.
Oh, sh*t. I'm sorry.
Oh, it's okay. Thank you.
Um, he's always been more
of a concept to me, really.
Um, but my mom was
actually there when it happened.
He... he paddled out,
and then he just
never came back.
-f*ck.
-Yeah.
Um, she just sat there
on the beach all day,
just praying,
but they never found his body.
Man, that is...
that's heartbreaking.
Sorry.
And Mom's, like,
dated around a little bit,
but I swear she, like,
intentionally picks losers
so that she won't
get attached, you know?
-Oh, no. That's the worst.
-[laughs] Yeah.
I think she just never
really got over my dad.
-But...
-Yeah.
ASTOR: What about you?
Are you close with your parents?
-BRANDYN: Who, Bob and Cindy?
-ASTOR: Yeah. [Chuckles]
Well, uh,
when I was about five,
Bob found the requirements
of fatherhood too trying.
So, you know, he bailed.
Cindy was pretty bitter.
She worked all the time.
But when she wasn't working,
she...
told me to leave her alone
and locked herself in her room.
Just... I think I look
too much like my dad, really.
It's just like a...
like a bad reminder.
I'm so sorry.
You were just a kid.
You know,
it's water under the bridge.
I still send her
an Edible Arrangement
every year on her birthday,
'cause she loves that sh*t.
So I do it. [Chuckles]
[engine revving]
Oh, yeah. We're here.
Oh, my gosh.
This place is big.
Yeah, well,
it belongs to my manager, Tom.
[sighs] Wow.
-Look at the stars.
-BRANDYN: Yeah.
You know, I don't really
believe in coincidences.
I think something special
brought us together.
Other than the Instagram
algorithm? [Laughs]
So, does affection
make you a little uncomfortable?
No, I don't know.
I just, like, make stupid jokes
when I'm nervous.
Don't be nervous.
Let me give you a tour.
This place is sick.
["I Am on Your Side"
by Lief Van Cleef playing]
[both laughing]
When the day,
it won't erase the night
When you find
yourself hurting
When you're looking
for some good advice
When the bottle's
not working
It'll be all right
Everything will be all right
I am on your side
I am on your side
Beautiful.
Yeah, I think
it was one of Dylan's.
Tom's a big guitar collector,
so...
Oh, my God.
Are you sure
it's okay if I play it?
Yeah, it's cool.
Okay.
Well... [chuckles]
Mmm.
-Okay. [Chuckles nervously]
-What?
Uh, I've never played this
for anybody before.
I just wrote it.
-All good.
-Okay.
[clears throat]
[strumming gently]
Maybe I'm afraid
Of the worst of it
Maybe I'm alone
Feeling lost again
Keeping my hopes
Where they ought to be
Should I speak my mind
Or should I wait and see
Take your time
Take what's mine
I'll give it all to you
I'll give it all to you
Tell me once
And I'll tell twice
Give it all to you
Give it all to you
[vocalizing]
-[Astor chuckles]
-Holy sh*t.
[sighs]
Astor, your voice is insane.
That was incredible.
Thank you. [Laughs]
God, you are extraordinary.
Do you have any idea
how much you turn me on?
[uplifting music]
Rise and shine.
Didn't we just go to bed?
-We got sh*t to do.
-[Astor yawns]
I don't suppose you're gonna
tell me where we're going.
BRANDYN: Of course not. Come on,
you can sleep in the car.
-Come on.
-[Astor groaning]
[joyful music]
ASTOR: What is that smell?
Ah, rotting fish.
I think we learned about
this place at school.
-Salton Sea?
-Yeah.
Isn't this, like,
an ecological disaster?
Yeah, pretty much.
They stocked the sea
full of, like, millions of fish.
People came from all over.
But they knew
it wouldn't last that long
'cause with no fresh water
coming in, it'd get too salty.
What happened to all the fish?
They died.
And a bunch of birds, too.
-Oh, that's so sad.
-I know.
Weirdly, I can relate.
-To a poisonous lake?
-Yeah.
You know,
at first it's new and exciting,
and everyone wants
to be close to you,
own a piece of you.
And then, over time, they find
the next new cool thing
and stop giving
a f*ck about you.
You're just left salty
and reeking of death.
-God, you're mean. Jeez.
-[Astor laughs]
I'm sorry,
but this smell is k*lling me.
Yeah, it's pretty bad.
Wanna get lunch?
-Yeah.
-Okay.
Okay.
Tell me a secret.
Secret? [Laughs]
Oh, man, I don't know.
Well...
there is one thing.
But I've never
told anybody before.
The definition of a secret.
No, but this is really bad.
You're gonna think
I'm a terrible person.
No, I doubt that. Go ahead.
[sighs]
-I k*lled a cat.
-Like, with your bare hands?
No, it was... [scoffs]
God, I'm gonna start crying.
It was an accident.
I hit it with my car.
Okay, no, that's different.
I hit a deer.
You know, it's really hard
to avoid animals on the road.
No, this was my fault.
I was texting and driving,
and it was in a neighborhood,
so I know it was somebody's pet,
and it just breaks my heart.
I can't believe
I just told you that.
Your secret's safe with me.
It's all good.
I'm gonna get another beer.
You want one?
Uh, no, I'm okay.
You wanna sh**t some pool?
Sure, yeah,
but I'm not very good.
No, me either.
["Insider" by Tom Petty playing]
Why aren't there
places like this in LA?
You know, I swear,
when people stop
giving a sh*t about me,
I'm moving out here.
I'm gonna try to buy this place.
Maybe I can be the house band.
Do you feel like people don't
care about your music anymore?
It doesn't seem like that to me.
I mean, you know,
there was a moment
when I thought
I was gonna be something big,
and that just, uh,
never really happened.
And I'm the one
who oughta know
I'm not trying
to sound ungrateful.
It's just, you know...
I thought there'd be more.
-More what?
-I don't know.
Yeah,
I'm the broken-hearted fool
All right,
wanna get out of here?
Sure.
Oh, I'm an insider
I've been burned by the fire
And I've had to live
with some hard promises
I've crawled
through the briars
I'm an insider
-Well, I got some bad news.
-Where are we?
I'll tell you where we're not.
Near a gas station.
Are we out of gas?
[sighs] You ever hitchhiked?
Are you serious?
It's a cage without a key
And you can feel the danger
Yeah, and I'm the one
who oughta know
-What in the world?
-That's you in five years.
Yeah, I'm the one
you couldn't trust
Yeah, I'm the lonely,
silent one
MAN: How you doing?
Any chance you could
maybe take us into town?
MAN: Uh, come on.
BRANDYN: Thank you so much.
Really appreciate it, man.
I'm an insider
Oh, I'm an insider
Oh, I'm an insider
All right, Hal.
Thank you so much, man.
Yeah, I, uh, don't know
how you plan on getting back.
Uh, most folks around here
ain't as sweet as me.
I reckon I better
give you a lift.
Oh, that would be awesome.
Thank you.
[barks]
-Better watch that.
-[Astor chuckles]
How long have you been out here?
Too dang long.
If there was ever
a nothing bill,
you'd probably wanna
stab your stake right here.
Now, they keep talking about
wanting to clean up the sea,
but us locals would wish they'd
just leave us the hell alone.
-Yeah?
-Should we do it?
-Yeah.
-BRANDYN: All right.
[engine humming]
Hey, man, thank you again.
Really appreciate it.
Dude, I ain't taking no $100
just to give you a ride
to the damn gas station.
Thank you.
You know, uh...
scorpions only interact
between courtship
or cannibalism.
You take care, sweetie.
You look like a nice gal.
Thank you.
["La Grange" by ZZ Top playing]
BRANDYN: That was fun, huh?
ASTOR: Yeah. [Chuckles]
Got a present for you.
[Astor laughs]
Yeah, baby.
I thought it looked sexy on Hal,
but I think you got him.
[both laughing]
A-haw haw haw-haw
Heh, a-haw haw-haw
Well, I hear it's fine
If you got the time
And the ten
to get yourself in
A hmm, hmm, hmm
ASTOR: Wow, smells great.
-BRANDYN: Thank you.
-Can I help?
Yeah, you wanna make the salad?
-Sure.
-Great.
So what are we having?
Well, tonight we'll be enjoying
a lovely whole salmon fillet
with mustard sauce
over wilted greens
accompanied by a salad
and a delicious Pinot noir
from the Willamette Valley
in Oregon.
-Ooh-la-la.
-Yeah.
Where'd you learn to cook?
My ex got me a bunch of
cooking lessons one Christmas.
You know,
before she f*cked my drummer.
How long were you two together?
We dated for five years.
Uh, pretty sure Rachel
cheated on me on our honeymoon
and then managed
to stay together for three.
I'm sorry. It sounds
like it's still painful.
We don't have to talk about it.
It's fine.
I try not to shy away from pain.
Healing hurts, and the divorce
was, like, a year ago.
Plus, I just met
this fantastic girl.
[chuckles] Oh, yeah?
-Yeah.
-Tell me about her.
Well,
she's a f*cking smoke show.
Oh, gosh,
looks are so subjective.
And she's smart, sexy, funny,
and her voice just
takes me to another place.
["Show Me Where I Belong"
by Extreme Music playing]
Show me where I belong
Belong, belong, belong
[The Rolling Stones
music playing]
You know, I opened
for these guys in 2010.
Fifteen truck show.
-What?
-Yeah.
That is f*cking crazy.
It is crazy, yeah.
I mean,
those big productions are rough,
but... but I'm glad
I did it, I guess.
So, if you could go
anywhere in the world,
where would you go?
Well, I've been everywhere
and seen nothing but hotels,
tour buses, and green rooms,
and everything pretty much
looks the same, so...
But there's no place you
wanna go just, like, for fun,
just as a tourist?
Well, I don't know. Um, okay.
I had the best buffet of my life
at a titty bar
in Jackpot, Nevada.
It cost, like, three bucks.
It was so good.
-I swore I'd always go back.
-[Astor chuckles]
Okay, how about you, Astor?
Where are you dying
to go in the world?
I have never even left
the United States.
Come on, not even Mexico?
I know, it's so crazy.
Well, we should go tomorrow.
The border's, like,
less than an hour from here.
Or we could stay here.
You know, I got a masseuse
that makes house calls.
I mean, that sounds amazing,
but I have an audition tomorrow,
and dinner with Noelle.
-Who's Noelle?
-She's my bestie.
Okay, and the audition?
It's a car commercial.
What are you doing
in said car commercial?
I don't know.
I think it's something
silly, like,
Cute Girl Number Two
or something, I don't know.
It's just... it's just till
I make enough money for music.
Okay, just be careful with that.
What do you mean?
Well, the acting stuff.
You know, it'll confuse people.
If you wanna be
successful in music,
you got to be, like,
focused on one thing, you know?
Yeah, but I... [laughs]
I have to pay my rent, you know?
And as much as I love my mom,
I can't move back in
with her, so...
[chuckles] You should
come on my next tour.
As your opener
or as your road b*tch?
-Both.
-Don't tease me.
I've always wanted to be
someone's road b*tch.
[laughs] No, I'm serious.
We got a few dates
in Europe next month.
You should totally come.
I mean, that sounds incredible.
Okay, I'll talk to Tom.
Make it happen.
Okay, I guess
I can skip the audition.
-Noelle won't mind.
-Yeah.
Oh, Mom, I like him so much.
He's... he's so intelligent,
and he's really sexy,
and, I don't know.
He believes in me.
Brandyn Verge thinks
that I'm the real deal.
That is just wonderful, sweetie.
ASTOR: Yeah.
All right, we're moving on.
You have an audition
this week, right?
I don't know, I think...
I think I might stop
with the acting stuff
and just... I don't know, I think
it's gonna confuse people, so...
Well, how are you
gonna pay the rent?
I am gonna see if
I can pick up another night
at Silver Lake Lounge,
so that'll cover my rent.
Great.
Oh, are you cold?
I have an extra sweater.
Oh, thank you.
Thanks again for the tickets,
by the way.
Thank Morgan for getting sick.
Honestly, I don't know
if I can kiss her anymore.
I mean, after hearing her hock
up loogies for an entire week.
Ew, my God.
Doesn't she cover her mouth?
No, not always. Ew.
And, um, I wanted to say sorry.
I f*cked up.
I should've texted you
before I left for the desert.
Thanks.
Okay, now give me
all the details.
[Astor chuckles]
Seriously, it was, like,
the best three days
of my whole life. [Laughs]
We went
on this amazing adventure,
and we listened to music,
and we talked,
and he cooked for me.
And did y'all f*ck?
Um, duh. [Laughs]
-That's my girl.
-Yeah.
Dude, it was... it was so good.
Ben and Justin were,
like, teenage boys.
Brandyn is a man.
He actually looked at me
when we were having sex.
-Whoa.
-I know. It's crazy.
Okay, did he stick
anything weird up your butt?
Oh, my God. No, Jesus.
-The line's moved a little bit.
-Okay.
-Oh, f*ck.
-What?
-It's Brandyn.
-Is everything okay?
Oh, I don't know.
He's just... he's been drinking.
He's asking for a ride.
Tell him that you're
waiting in line for the show.
Yeah, I did already.
Can't he ask one of his friends?
I don't think
he really has any friends.
He says he's lonely.
I feel really bad.
What if he, like,
drinks and drives,
and then he hurts himself
or he hurts somebody else?
For f*ck's sake, he's got,
like, a whole team of people.
This would be the second time
you bailed on me this week.
I'm not bailing on you.
-I just really like him.
-I thought you liked me too.
I love you.
That's not what I'm saying.
You know that's
not what I'm saying.
Can I just Venmo you
for the ticket
and call you tomorrow?
Okay, whatever.
-I love you. I'm sorry.
-Bye.
Have fun. I love you. Bye-bye.
I love you. Sorry.
I'll remember this forever.
ASTOR: Okay, sorry.
You guys wanna be my friend?
[somber music]
[knocking]
Hey.
Hey.
-You okay?
-Hmm?
-You all right?
-Mmm.
-[Brandyn retching]
-Oh, God!
Oh, no. Oh, be careful.
-[Brandyn coughs]
-You okay?
[engine revving]
sh*t.
Oh, come on.
Oh, God.
You're a f*cking
terrible driver.
Well, give me a break.
Only old people know
how to drive a stick.
[engine revving]
Can you just stop?
Okay, I can't listen
to that anymore.
Move it. I'm gonna drive.
-Seriously?
-Yeah.
I left Noelle and a concert
to come help you.
I'm not cool riding around
with your drunk a*s.
Well, I'm not cool
with you leaving
my transmission on Wilshire.
So f*cking skedaddle.
-Come on.
-Oh, my God.
Fine, whatever.
I'm gonna get an Uber.
All right. Suit yourself.
[engine revving]
I'm afraid of the work
it might take
What if I'm good
but I'm not great?
What if I'm good
but I'm not quite great?
And what if I'm good
but I'm not quite great?
[knocking on door]
[knocking continues]
BRANDYN: Rise and shine,
Astor Grey.
Morning.
How'd you get through
the security gate?
Jumped the fence.
[Brandyn grunting]
Hi.
Come to apologize for
ruining my Saturday night?
I got breakfast.
[Brandyn chuckles]
You're perky, considering.
Well, you know,
drank some Red Bulls,
recorded all night.
Johnny came over.
We made a reggae album.
-A reggae album?
-Mm-hmm.
Oh, it's f*cking,
like, death metal reggae.
We did a cover of
"No Woman, No Cry."
-I like Bob Marley.
-Of course you do.
I mean, don't get me wrong.
Bob Marley is a perfectly
acceptable introduction.
There's just so much
better stuff out there
that people never
listen to, you know?
Like, um, Winston Rodney,
Toots Hibbert, Frankie Paul.
You can't really
call yourself a reggae fan
if you only listen to Marley.
Sorry. [Chuckles]
Okay.
-Did you get this from Superba?
-Mm-hmm.
-How long was the line?
-f*cking stupid long.
But, you know, you said
you loved those things, so...
-Thank you.
-Kiss me. We'll call it even.
I haven't brushed my teeth yet.
Well, come on.
Put some pants on,
dragon breath.
-We got sh*t to do.
-What's going on?
We're gonna
f*cking record your LP.
That's what we're gonna do.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Let's go. Hurry up.
-Okay.
[uplifting music]
I'll give it all to you
I'll give it all to you
Oh
I'll give it all to you
[vocalizing]
Damn. I think we got it.
Are you sure?
I mean, we just did one pass.
-I think I could do better.
-Trust me, babe.
I'm a pro. You nailed it.
This is so exciting. [Chuckles]
What do we do next?
Well, you sign this contract,
BNA puts out your record,
and I make you a star.
How does that sound?
Too good to be true.
[laughs]
Just sign it right there.
Um, I mean, shouldn't I have
Kate take a look at this?
Honestly,
got a ton of respect for Kate,
but she's taken you
as far as she can.
I'll manage you.
With my connections
and your voice,
the sky is the limit.
I don't know. Um...
I don't know. I mean, I've been
with Kate for a long time.
-I really trust her.
-What? You don't trust me?
-Of course I do.
-[Brandyn chuckles]
It's just a standard contract.
[door closes]
[triangle dinging]
["I'm on Fire"
by Bruce Springsteen playing]
Hey, little girl,
is your daddy home?
Did he go away
and leave you all alone?
Mm-hmm
I got a bad desire
Oh, oh, oh, I'm on fire
Hey, little girl,
is your daddy home?
Did he go away
and leave you all alone?
Mm-hmm
I got a bad desire
Oh, oh, oh, I'm on fire
Tell me now,
baby, is he good to you?
Can he do to you
the things that I do?
Oh, no,
I can take you higher
Oh, oh, oh, I'm on fire
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Sometimes it's like
someone took a knife
Baby, edgy and dull,
and cut a six-inch valley
Through the middle
of my skull
At night, I wake up
with the sheets soakin' wet
And a freight train runnin'
through the middle...
So I rewrote the album, like,
an hour before
the studio session.
Oh, I just booked work
for tomorrow.
Car commercial?
-No, I skipped that. Remember?
-Not really.
-What's the gig?
-Soda.
I'm playing a sexy astronaut.
Babe,
you can't keep chasing cash
if you're gonna succeed
in this business.
Yeah, I get it.
I just... I have bills, so...
Well, you could move in with me.
Wouldn't have to pay rent.
Problem solved.
What do you think?
[Astor chuckles]
That's a really nice offer,
but...
I love my boat, and we just met.
It's not like I ask many people
to move in with me, you know?
We have such a good time.
You make me laugh.
We could record all the time.
Think about it.
[chuckles] I mean,
that sounds great.
I just... I don't know,
it's kind of a big deal.
I've never lived with anybody
except for my mom.
Listen, I...
I kind of need to know
if you don't wanna have
an adult relationship, you know?
I can't really waste my time
with some casual thing.
It's not really my vibe.
You know what I'm saying?
'Cause I felt...
WOMAN: No, I said no.
I don't wanna go
on the boat with somebody who
just did a f*cking speed ball.
-MAN: Shut the f*ck up.
-WOMAN: f*ck you.
-The f*ck?
-WOMAN: Leave me alone.
You know what? Shut the f*ck up.
-WOMAN: Let me go.
-MAN: Chill the f*ck out.
-Let me go. Leave me alone.
-Hey, dude. All right.
-Party's over, okay?
-Just leave us alone.
-We're f*cking going.
-Just let go of the girl's arm.
-Thank you.
-WOMAN: Oh.
Why don't you mind
your own f*cking business?
-[Brandyn grunts]
-Oh, my God.
-BRANDYN: f*ck!
-Yes, babe! Yes!
-BRANDYN: Oh, my God.
-f*ck you, dude.
-BRANDYN: Ow.
-[both laughing]
-BRANDYN: Ow.
-Oh, my God.
-BRANDYN: Oh, my God. f*ck.
-ASTOR: I'm sorry.
-[Brandyn groaning]
-This is a horrible idea.
I don't wanna f*ck up your face.
Okay, well, I don't need
to look pretty, okay?
Either you do it or I'll do it.
-Okay, okay. Okay.
-Just... yeah.
-f*ck, f*ck, f*ck. Okay.
-Yeah, just...
-One, two, three.
-[bone cracking]
-[screaming] God!
-Oh, my God.
-Are you okay?
-[groans]
-[sighs]
-You okay?
-Yeah, I think you fixed me.
-Oh, my God.
-Holy sh*t.
-[both laughing]
Oh, my God.
Okay, can we talk about
you moving in with me now?
[laughs] Are you serious?
Yeah, we can do
the Europe tour next month,
and then, you know,
when we get back,
pop over to Vegas,
make it official.
[chuckles] Well, now I know
you're messing with me.
-Mm-mm.
-Didn't you just get a divorce?
Yeah, I did.
But I learned a lot from
that shitty relationship.
Mainly that I married
the wrong person.
But you know that doesn't mean
I don't believe in love.
'Cause I love you, Astor Grey.
I don't know what to say.
Say you love me too.
-I love you too.
-f*ck yeah.
-[Astor laughs]
-Then it's settled. All right.
I need a bong rip
and a c*ck.
f*ck, that hurt.
-[Brandyn groans]
-[Astor sighs]
[tender music]
[sighs]
BRANDYN: Mmm.
I think I need another pill.
Just give it
a little time to kick in.
Tell me about your first tour.
[sighs] Will you rub my head?
-Mm-hmm.
-Thank you.
Um, yeah, I think I was 20.
Moved to Nashville.
I think it was, like, 2000.
Wait. How old were you in 2000?
I was two.
[both laughing]
So I was in a band
when you were born.
That's actually so funny.
Um, I was in a band
when I was born, too.
-What?
-Magenta Placenta.
Oh, my God,
that's f*cking weird.
Well, I'm f*cking weird.
Oh, God. Thank God you're cute.
What was the name of your band?
I can't remember.
We were awful,
I'll tell you that.
Bunch of posers, you know?
Speaking of posers...
I have a 6:00 a.m.
call time tomorrow.
-[laser zapping]
-[snarling]
[otherworldly music playing]
[vocalizing]
And cut.
-What's her name again?
-Astor.
Hi, Esther. I gotta ask.
Do you want intergalactic peace?
Because I don't really
believe that you do,
and I want to believe,
Esther, trust me.
So here's what I need from you.
I need you
to show me that you believe
that Starship Soda
can save the universe.
-The whole universe?
-DIRECTOR: Exactly.
-Except this time more passion.
-Oh, sure, okay.
And maybe this time,
maybe take a sip of the drink.
Sure. Oh.
All right, let's sh**t it again.
Oh, God.
Are you HeyAstorGrey on Twitter?
Uh, yeah, I think so.
So how do you know
Brandyn Verge?
-Are you guys dating?
-What?
[sighs] You are so lucky.
No, Brandyn's music,
it's gotten me through,
like, every single one
of my breakups.
So what's he like?
I'm sorry, I'm so confused.
How do you know who I am?
He tweeted something
about you guys
making an album,
going on tour together.
I figured you guys
must be dating,
'cause he hasn't posted
about another girl
since that b*tch Rachel
broke his heart.
Oh, um, sorry,
I think I'm wrapped.
Uh, hey, could I get
a van back to base?
-[camera shutter clicks]
-[chuckles]
[gentle music]
-Where did you even get it?
-BRANDYN: Your mom's Facebook.
And you just decided to post
the most awkward photo
of me in existence?
Uh, you're welcome, you know,
for producing
and promoting your album.
I didn't even know
there was an album.
Yeah, well,
I wanted to surprise you.
Told you I make sh*t happen.
This is all very cool,
and I'm really grateful.
I just think that I need things
to slow down a little bit, okay?
Okay, yeah, well, that's not
really how this sh*t works.
You gotta be able to keep up.
You should've been
more up front with me
if you're not serious
about music, you know?
That's not what I'm saying.
Look, I'm super tired,
and I had a really long day,
so I'm just gonna go home, okay?
What? No, that's stupid.
Just stay.
I wanna sleep in my own bed.
Well, I have been waiting
all day for you, you know?
I even took a shower.
Put on some smelly stuff.
Sniff me. It's pretty good.
You're gonna like it.
[Astor sniffs]
I love you.
I love you too.
Let's go to bed.
[Brandyn grunts]
[Brandyn moaning]
[distorted music]
[grunting]
[Brandyn panting]
[Brandyn snoring]
ASTOR: Hey.
It just... Brandyn's ran off,
and he's been just,
like, pretty hectic,
so I just trying to
give you some news.
Sure, yeah, that'd be great.
That'd be cool.
Okay, cool.
All right, thanks so much, Kate.
Okay, bye.
Hey.
-Good to see you.
-You too.
Rachel.
Yeah, I know. Astor.
So I need you to trust me, okay?
I need you to sit down and
listen to Rachel for a minute.
Sorry for crashing your lunch.
Just when Kate
told me about you,
I thought that it was vital
that we should meet
and, you know...
chat.
Okay.
RACHEL: I've known
Kate for years,
and she's always raved
about you, your music,
and I can only guess the things
that you've heard about me.
He hasn't said
anything about you.
That's sweet.
You don't have to lie.
I'm pretty sure Brandyn
has told the neighbor's dog
that I'm a psycho. I mean,
he called my poor mom a c**t
on her church group's
Facebook page, so...
[scoffs]
That sounds par for the course.
I'm sorry, is the point of this
just to talk sh*t about Brandyn?
-RACHEL: No.
-KATE: Yeah.
Sorry.
Uh, I'm here because Kate said
that you're about to sign
a record deal with Brandyn.
We have recorded
some of my songs.
-Yeah.
-And you guys are dating.
How is that
any of your business?
Look, I know
this must seem weird, okay?
And I don't want you
to feel ambushed, but...
Rachel isn't talking sh*t, okay?
She's being honest.
She's here because
she doesn't want him
to destroy
somebody else's career.
This is not hyperbole.
Brandyn is the worst.
RACHEL: Five years ago,
I was the biggest believer
in Brandyn Verge,
and I managed to convince myself
that we could transcend his
resentment and vindictiveness,
because... because
when he binges on you,
it just feels so good.
And then he purges.
Uh...
can I play something for you?
BRANDYN: Hey, babe.
You're probably off, you know,
f*cking one of my friends
right now,
but I just wanted
to let you know
that I did find
that diploma, you know?
So just give me an address,
and I'll send it to you, okay?
Just after
I wipe my a*s with it.
f*ck yourself. c*m dumpster.
That was three weeks ago.
I have plenty more like that.
I'm gonna go.
I will give you a call later,
Kate, when you're alone.
He stole her songs, Astor.
Then this prick
threatened me when I called
trying to get the rights back.
All right,
this is a vengeful m*therf*cker.
I'd like to kick
the f*cking sh*t out of him.
Just be careful. Please.
I was an idiot in love.
I signed that stupid contract
without even reading it.
[ominous music]
Show me the contract
before you sign it.
Um, hey, do you think
we could talk about my contract?
Yeah, of course. Wait...
are you already
demanding more money?
-Holy sh*t.
-No. I just, um...
I don't know, it seems...
it seems like maybe
you own my songs now.
Well, BNA owns the songs
on the album, you know?
But they're my best songs.
Which is why they're
on the album, babe.
I mean, typically you don't put
your worst sh*t on there, right?
Well, do you think
we could take that part out
about you owning my songs?
I mean, it's just
our standard contract, you know?
What's this all about?
Did you meet with Kate?
You did, didn't you? You know
she f*cking hates my guts.
She's good friends with my ex.
Yeah, uh,
Rachel was there too, actually.
BRANDYN: What?
Wait, why was my ex-wife
at your meeting?
Honestly, I'm still
trying to figure that out.
I mean,
Kate reps Rachel too, but...
-Oh, God.
-I don't know.
It was... it was weird.
You know what?
They're gonna try to
turn you against me.
I guarantee it.
Well, Rachel did play a pretty
nasty voicemail you left her.
You called her a c*m dumpster?
-She said it was recent.
-Yeah. Yeah.
Look, I may not have been
entirely candid with you.
I'm still struggling
with this Rachel stuff.
I loved her so much,
and sometimes I don't know
how to turn that off.
So, yeah,
there's some anger there,
because I'd really like
to stop caring.
Clearly she has.
Well, if you want to move on,
then why would you leave her
antagonistic messages?
Yeah. Honestly, I don't know.
Why did Rachel marry me and
then turn around and f*ck Arlo?
Trampling my heart
wasn't enough?
She had to destroy me?
And you know what?
That worked for a while.
But now she sees me with you,
madly in love,
and she is back
to her old games.
And, yeah, I... I definitely
drank too much wine,
and said some stupid sh*t.
I admit that.
Did she mention that
I texted her the next morning?
To apologize? No?
f*ck, why won't she
just leave me alone?
Hey.
You know I form my own opinions.
-Yeah.
-And I want you to be able
to talk to me about anything.
Yeah.
I think Rachel was
just looking for drama.
I'm not gonna engage.
I love you.
I love you too.
I think we should adopt a cat.
-What do you think?
-[Astor chuckles]
Hey.
Oh, yeah.
-Oh, yeah.
-[door clicks open]
What about Judge Judy?
You wanna watch Judge Judy?
No, silly. For a name.
Don't you think
she looks judicial?
-[laughs] No.
-"Hi, Mommy."
"I find you guilty.
-"Guilty."
-[both laughing]
-So what's your show tonight?
-Oh, it's Kicking the Stigma.
It's, like, a mental health
benefit or something.
Playing a couple songs.
-You're coming, right?
-Of course.
Okay, good.
You think Noelle can come,
maybe her girlfriend?
Babe,
you can invite whoever you want.
Just text me the names, and I'll
have Greta put 'em on the list.
[cat meows]
This room is
literally not green.
Welcome to the beige room.
-[chuckling]
-Do you guys want some wine?
[gasps] I'm... I'm okay.
Oh, do you think
Bran's gonna be on soon?
Should we go find our seats?
Well, actually, he said we could
watch from the side of the stage
-if you guys want to.
-Oh, my God. That's so cool.
-This one is for you.
-Thank you.
And for you.
WOMAN 1: He's still an as*h*le.
WOMAN 2: Yeah, I know.
He's just a plain as*h*le.
Hey, do you guys know
if Brandyn Verge is playing?
The one and only.
Okay, let's go.
-[crowd cheering]
-BRANDYN: Thank you.
And thank you so much
for coming out tonight
for Kicking the Stigma.
Listen, I got a special guest
for you guys tonight.
You're gonna love her.
She is an amazing,
talented singer-songwriter
with the voice of an angel.
Ladies and gentlemen,
give it up for Renee Merrifield.
Excuse me.
Maybe I'm afraid
Of the worst of it
Maybe I'm alone
Feeling lost again
Deep in my eyes,
where they all could be
Should I speak my mind?
Should I wait and see?
Take your time
Take what's mine
I give it all
f*ck! Such a good show, right?
["Breach" by Dogstar
playing on stereo]
Yeah.
Did, uh, Noelle and
her friends leave early?
I must've missed 'em.
Yep.
Are you pissed or drunk?
I can't tell.
Well, I'm not drunk.
So you're pissed. Awesome.
You guys played my song.
Is that what this is about?
Oh, for f*ck's sake.
Did you hear
what I said at the end?
I gave you a massive shout-out.
God,
I thought you'd be thanking me,
not give me
the f*cking silent treatment.
But you're pushing
hard enough to breach
-[Brandyn sighs]
-[music volume increases]
Once you love me
I'll take it from you
Ow! Stop! f*ck! Ow!
f*ck, f*ck, f*ck, f*ck.
Oh, my God.
f*ck. Oh, sh*t. [Gasps]
-f*ck! Oh, my God.
-sh*t, are you okay?
What the f*ck is wrong with you?
You're pissed off at me,
so then you run me over?
What... No. I was parking,
and you f*cking jumped out.
Why the f*ck would
you keep driving
-when I get out of the car?
-Let me look at it.
-I'm sure it's not that bad.
-Don't f*cking touch me.
Fine. All right,
just get in the car.
I'm not going anywhere with you.
Okay, I'll call an ambulance.
I can't afford
a f*cking ambulance.
Well, I'll pay for it.
Jesus Christ, Astor.
-What do you want from me?
-I want you to leave me alone
so I can get an Uber
to f*cking urgent care.
-Just get in the car, please.
-Oh, my God.
Okay, come in the house
for a bong rip, all right?
Just relax. You know,
it'll help a little bit.
You're acting a little crazy.
No.
Astor!
What the f*ck?
Seriously?
You're gonna get in
that stranger's car?
Hey, lady,
is that guy bothering you?
I'll jump out and
I'll smack the sh*t out of him.
Uh, that... no, that's okay.
I just fell.
Okay. Let's go.
[phone chiming repeatedly]
What are you doing here?
Just wanted to
make sure you're okay.
Mm-hmm.
What's the verdict?
It's not broken.
Rite Aid didn't
have one that said,
"Sorry I ran over you," so...
God, I feel so terrible, Astor.
But, you know,
it was an accident.
I can't believe
you could think otherwise.
Even if it was an accident,
it was an accident you caused.
Yeah.
I take full responsibility.
I am so sorry. I just...
I hope you can see that.
[sighs] I just...
I've never loved
someone like this.
Believe me, I would
rather hurt myself than you.
Sometimes I feel so connected
to you, and it feels like
the most exciting thing
that's ever happened to me.
But then,
I don't know, you're just...
you're so different,
and I don't know
which version of you
I'm gonna get.
The... the sensitive, funny guy,
or the celebrity as*h*le
that I'm embarrassed
to introduce
to my friends and family.
Look, I made a mistake.
Many mistakes.
But that doesn't mean I don't
wanna build a life with you.
A loving,
respectful, trusting life
where we can be open and free
to create music together.
I mean, don't you see
what we have? It's so...
it's so special.
I want that too,
but I just don't know...
I promise.
You won't be sorry.
NOELLE: So you're
living here now?
Well, no. Not, like, really.
I sold my boat, so...
-That's good.
-Yeah.
Oh, guess what? [Laughs]
I got 4,000
new Instagram followers.
-Oh, that's cool.
-Pretty sick.
Um, so did he ever
give you an explanation
on why he played
your song without asking you?
Um...
I don't know.
I think he was just trying
to surprise me, you know?
But the fact that
he believes in me
gives me this whole new
level of confidence.
Like, he could've chosen
any song, and he chose mine.
And, uh, we're just
gonna skip over the fact
that he hit you
with his f*cking car?
Dude, he didn't hit me
with his car, okay? [Laughs]
He ran over my foot.
And he feels really bad,
and he keeps on apologizing.
He feels really bad about it.
So he hurts you and then
says some sweet things to you
and maybe gives you some treats,
and now you're
just cool with it?
What is your problem
with Brandyn?
You're the one that
told me to go out with him
-in the first place.
-Yeah, to hook up, and, like,
have fun,
and not move in here with him.
If that's the way you feel, then
why did you even come over here?
Because you are my best friend.
And if you're hurt,
of course I'm gonna be here.
But if you want me to, like,
fawn over
your rock star boyfriend,
then you should call
one of your stupid friends,
because it's crystal clear to me
and everyone who loves you,
this guy f*cking sucks.
Hey. Thought I'd join you guys.
You're not leaving,
are you, Noelle?
-I am, Brandyn.
-BRANDYN: Oh.
All right, see you later.
[sighs]
BRANDYN: Hey.
-[door closes]
-Look at that.
Got those Spanish olives
you like from Erewhon.
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
-[Astor groans]
-Oh, babe, hey.
-It's okay.
-No, it's not okay.
My best friend f*cking hates me.
I thought I was
your best friend.
It's just music
and the streetcar.
It just was all so romantic.
Maybe I'll run away to Lisbon.
Sorry, Mom, I need a minute.
Is everything okay?
Yeah.
I just need to make a call.
Okay, why don't you
meet me at the Thai place?
-Okay.
-Yeah.
Mom? Mom,
can I please borrow the car?
-Are you okay?
-Yeah. Um...
Or, no, I don't know.
Brandyn, he's freaking out
and he's making these threats,
so can I please
just borrow the car?
-He's threatening you?
-No, Mom.
Uh, I don't know. I don't know.
He said he was
gonna k*ll himself,
but now he's not
answering his phone, so...
Astor, that's serious.
He needs some professional help.
Mom, come on.
If anything happened,
I would never forgive myself,
so can I please borrow the car?
-I'll drive you.
-Okay, let's go.
-Okay.
-Okay, let's go.
Hey.
What the f*ck?
You can't just barge in here.
Seriously?
After all those messages
you left me?
I was at the movies
with my mom, by the way.
-I left you a note.
-Okay, um, you're a liar,
a sl*t, and I'm too busy
for this bullshit drama,
so you can just go.
Thanks so much.
Are you kidding me?
Less than an hour ago,
you said you would
jump off a bridge
if I didn't answer your call,
and now I'm a sl*t.
How f*cking drunk are you?
Okay, please,
don't flatter yourself.
I'm not gonna k*ll myself
over you, all right?
You are an immature, spoiled
brat, eating your $5 croissant
somebody waited
an hour in line to buy.
You've never been to
a store to buy a record.
You f*cking download 'em
and breeze past each song
for 30 seconds.
You will never relate
to any true artist,
much less be one,
because there's nothing original
or exciting about you.
You're a f*cking basic b*tch,
a nobody,
and I cannot believe
I fell for your sh*t.
What the f*ck is wrong with you?
Do you really think that you
and your stupid-a*s d*ke friend
can come in here
in my house and judge me?
Get the f*ck out of my studio,
you f*cking wannabe.
Here. Take your f*cking records.
Here you go.
Go f*ck yourself, Brandyn.
BRANDYN: Don't k*ll the cat.
Dude, what are you doing?
Please don't text him back.
He'll never stop.
I'm not.
I just changed his name.
[chuckles]
[sighs] I'm so f*cking stupid.
I fell in love with a monster.
I'm worried about you, sweetie.
You need to
take care of yourself.
I know.
[instructor on recording]
With every breath,
becoming more aware,
releasing the negativity
and tuning in...
-[phone chimes]
-to your intuition.
[mellow music]
ASTOR: I gotta
get back on stage.
Great. And that is one of the
reasons I wanted us to meet.
I got a call yesterday
from Hobie Ashman, okay?
Runs Nomad Records.
He got a hold of your EP,
and he was impressed.
Whoa.
How did he even hear it?
I don't even have a copy.
Wait, you don't have a copy
of the song that you recorded?
[sighs]
Brandyn did a limited press,
-and then he broke all of them.
-Wow.
So, any recent run-ins
with this prick?
According to Pitchfork,
he's in New York
recording a new album.
Oh, well, that figures.
Brandyn always thought
he was too cool for LA.
Legend in his own mind.
Thank you.
Let me get this, since
I can't make it tomorrow night.
Happy birthday, by the way.
Big two-five.
Yeah, thank you.
Getting older sucks. [Chuckles]
["2 Cents" by Rainsford playing]
Got a sore throat
and I keep choking
-To my favorite b*tch.
-[laughter]
I love you so much.
I love you too.
-Happy birthday.
-Thank you.
Cheers, guys. Thank you.
What the f*ck
are you doing here?
[scoffs] Get out of here
with this bullshit.
You were not invited.
You have to leave. Now.
Leave!
You're a nasty c**t, Noelle.
-[Brandyn grunts]
-[partygoers exclaiming]
[groaning]
-Let's go.
-ASTOR: Okay.
NOELLE: f*cking weirdo.
[groans]
[phone ringing]
Hey, sorry. One second.
f*ck. That f*cking sucks.
[sighs]
No, okay, yeah. I understand.
I'll see you this afternoon.
[sighs]
[gasps] Holy sh*t.
What happened?
Brandyn has claimed ownership
over all the songs on my EP.
So what's gonna happen
with the record?
What record?
There's no songs
and there's no EP.
There's no record, so...
sh*t.
So happy I get to
finally meet you in person.
I'm a big fan of your music.
Well, I'm a big fan
of anybody who's a big fan.
[laughs] She's funny.
You're funny.
Unfortunately... [laughs]
This contract
that Brandyn's people sent over,
it's no laughing matter, kiddo.
[sighs]
We're not gonna take it on.
Oh, come on, Hobie.
There has to be
something you can do.
This was her first contract.
Nobody looked at it.
-Brandyn took advantage.
-I hear you, Kate,
and what Brandyn did
was f*cked up, all right,
and I'm sorry for you. But...
he has a signed contract and
a team of lawyers behind him.
And so do you.
The good news,
you have an incredible voice,
all right, and a unique sound.
What we need are
some groovy new songs.
Okay?
[Maddie on intercom]
Edge is here.
Oh, thanks, Maddie.
[sighs] That's my next meeting.
Well, thank you so much
for meeting with me.
I will get home and
start writing some new songs.
HOBIE: That is the attitude.
-Hobie! My man.
-Ah. Yeah.
Please don't tell me
you're encouraging
my assistant to quit her job.
Hey, we all gotta
chase the dream.
I need you to
take this heartbreak,
put it on the page.
You are so talented.
HOBIE: I wanna introduce you.
This is Edgerrin.
He's here making an album
about creating the life
you want to live.
-KATE: Hmm.
-This is Kate and Astor.
Astor's an incredible singer,
and Kate, well,
she's one of the toughest
managers in the business.
-Oh, yeah?
-Yeah.
Maybe I should hire you.
Maybe you should.
-HOBIE: You should.
-Thanks, guys.
-I'll call you.
-Okay.
Excuse me.
You should, uh, exchange.
Oh.
-Good morning, sleepyhead.
-Hmm.
Why are you sleeping here?
I just didn't wanna be alone.
Why? What'd you think?
That sometimes I wonder
if I gave you the right tools.
What does that mean?
Being an artist
isn't very stable.
Well, just because
you're broke at 50
doesn't mean I will be too.
-Good morning.
-[sighs] I'm sorry, Mom.
I'm sorry. That was so mean.
I'm sorry. I'm just...
I'm in a really bad mood.
It's fine.
Oh, baby.
I want you to be happy
and have health insurance.
We're living in
a post-joy world, Mom.
Happiness went extinct
with the poor rhinos.
They're critically endangered.
Don't ever buy anything
with ivory.
Well, the way humans behave,
they're screwed.
We're all screwed.
Can I please
just go back to bed?
No.
You get to get up
and go get yourself
a nice, joyless job
to go along with
this sunny disposition.
Or I can just go home
and go to bed.
Well, if you can pay your rent.
-I can't cover you, kiddo.
-Oh, my God.
Why does everybody keep
calling me "kiddo"? I'm 25.
Wow, the Velvet Underground.
Hey, Nooch. Hey, Jim.
-Whoa.
-What's shaking, kiddo?
How's the music biz?
It's gnarly.
Hey, sorry,
I just realized it's the 6th
and I haven't paid you rent.
I'll get it to you tomorrow.
I promise.
Don't you worry about that,
angel.
I...
have become a millionaire.
What the f*ck is that?
-A $10,000...
-What?
-Bill.
-What is that?
-[phone ringing]
-Let me see this.
Let me see.
Well, Pink Floyd says, "Money."
NOOCH: Give me
the f*cking thing.
I think I'll buy
a football team with this.
-NOOCH: Let me look at it.
-Sorry, this is my manager.
I got to take this.
But have fun, you guys.
What the f*ck, man?
Is this real?
How is this even real?
Oh, it's a mindfuck for sure.
I was hesitant to
even bring this to you,
but the contract is legit,
as is the money.
-And it's all Europe?
-Yeah, and big venues too.
[sighs] There are many
obvious reasons to say no,
and as somebody who cares
about you, I hate this.
But as your manager,
I should tell you that
what they're offering is insane
and unheard of at your level.
[sighs] sh*t. I mean...
[chuckles] ...that would cover
my rent for, like, five years.
But he's asking me
to sell my soul.
Hmm, pretty much.
And they're willing
to compensate you
generously for it.
I don't know.
I don't know, Kate.
I just... I don't think
I can do this.
There has to be
something else, right?
-Please?
-[laughs]
You know, I'd never ask you
to do anything
you don't wanna do.
And this makes my skin crawl.
Brandyn is clearly
up to something.
Plus, it'll be fun
to tell them no.
[chuckles]
I have, like...
$17 to my name. [Chuckles]
Is it so crazy
to say no to six figures?
I wouldn't spend
the weekend with this guy
if they offered
a million dollars,
much less go on tour with him.
We're gonna find
something better.
Yep.
BRANDYN: Astor.
You down there?
-What do you want?
-Hey.
How are ya?
Okay, I know you're pissed.
Um...
can I come aboard, please?
-No.
-Look,
I just got out of rehab
this morning,
and, um...
you're my first stop.
On your apology world tour?
[chuckles] Yeah, basically.
I guess I understand why people
think I'm such an as*h*le now.
ASTOR: Yeah, me too.
Is that why you said no?
I don't understand how
you could possibly think
that it would be a good idea
for us to go on tour together.
Well, because I know that I
can't find a better opening act.
I want the rights
to my songs back.
Okay.
If I say yes, will you come?
Look, this is
a huge opportunity for you
to introduce your music
to the world.
'Cause in my opinion,
they are missing out.
Dude, this is too weird.
[chuckles uncomfortably]
You're just showing up
and saying nice things to me.
I get it. I get it.
You know, it's gonna
take us a lot of time
to get used to
sober Brandyn, right?
But, um...
just give me a second chance.
I f*cked up, and
I really wanna be your friend.
And I, uh...
brought this over here.
This, um,
used to belong to Joni.
But, um, yeah.
Hope to see you in Germany.
This is the only way
that I can get my songs back.
And he's sober now, so...
NOELLE: I know
you're smarter than this.
Going on tour with a guy
who treated you like sh*t?
You don't need to do this.
Is that really how you see me?
Just as the victim?
No, but...
it's an evergreen story.
Older, powerful dude dangles a
woman's dreams in front of her,
and then
the next thing you know,
she's got c*m
all over her favorite Gap dress.
Ugh, I hate The Gap.
Me too.
Ugh,
I hate that you're doing this.
I swear to God,
if he f*ck with you,
he's gonna regret it.
I'm sorry I've been such a pain.
I love you so much, and you're
always there for me. I'm sorry.
I forgive you.
Just don't ever ditch me
for a guy again.
I won't. I promise.
Hello, welcome. I'm Ally.
Would you like
a glass of champagne?
Oh, I'm okay, thank you.
Um, I'm Astor.
Do you know if there's
somewhere I'm supposed to sit?
Anywhere you like.
-Okay, thank you.
-You're welcome.
Oh, sh**t, sorry,
were you sitting here?
No, no, no,
you're welcome to sit there,
but you might feel a little
more comfortable up front.
-No way.
-Yeah.
ASTOR: Oh, that's okay,
thank you.
Hey, sorry, excuse me.
Do you know how long
this flight is?
Five hours and 15 minutes
to New York.
Um, we'll refuel
and we'll pick up the band,
and then another nine hours
or so to Berlin.
Awesome, thank you.
-Hi!
-BRANDYN: Hey there.
-ALLY: Champagne?
-BRANDYN: Thank you.
[indistinct chatter]
[mellow music]
[phone ringing]
-WOMAN ON PHONE: Astor?
-Yes?
Hi, this is Greta,
Brandyn's assistant.
There's a production meeting
at 10:00 p.m.
-Oh, okay, where is it?
-Room 304.
Okay, thank you.
BRANDYN: You're not
room service.
Wanna join?
Guess I learned my lesson
about making prank phone calls.
Excuse me?
I should probably
say sorry or something.
I'm guessing
it wasn't your idea.
-Mm-mm.
-I'm Astor, by the way.
Duh. I'm Stassi.
I thought it would be fun
to f*ck a rock star, but...
I'm over it.
I'm flying home tonight.
Yeah, I was trying to
figure out a way to warn you.
He's a total as*h*le.
Yeah, I could see that
from the minute I met him,
but I'm leaving because I can't
stand his loud-a*s snoring.
And the sex is lame.
[both chuckle]
For the record,
I totally would've f*cked you.
["Love Me Like You Hate Me"
by Rainsford playing]
I know what I'm feeling
But there's a fear
in the back of my mind
Mmm
Maybe it's uneven
Begging you to give me more
And give me time
Mmm
And I wonder
what you really...
-Hey.
-ASTOR: Hey.
You must be Astor. I'm Greta.
Nice to meet you.
And I wonder
why you're mad at me
Oh, crap.
Stop, stop, stop, stop.
Just got a text from Brandyn.
He needs a drive
to the radio station.
Uh... uh, Astor, I really
hate to ask you to do this,
but could you pop back out?
We'll sweep back around again.
Thanks, babe.
Shouldn't take too long, though.
You'll still have plenty of time
for sound check, okay?
I'll take it
You love me like you hate me
I'm so scared...
-Hey, hey.
-BRANDYN: What up?
What's going on?
BRANDYN: Let's do
the damn thing.
GRETA: Yeah.
BRANDYN: I wanted
to create an album
that sounded like a whole band,
but really, it was just me.
And it f*cking worked.
Yeah, yeah, it sure did.
So, you had a bit of
an incident last summer
at a music festival in Paris,
and the European press
was pretty unkind to you
about the situation.
All right, well,
first off, uh, f*ck France.
It's like, I swear,
I open my mouth
and people just get offended.
Okay, Neil Young wrote
a song called "Stupid Girl."
Rolling Stones have
a song called "Stupid Girl."
"Stupid Girl," right?
These songs would
get them canceled
-in this Me Too era.
-Exactly.
They're destroying art.
Don't get me wrong.
I love women, all right?
I got a bunch of badass chicks
as roadies on my tour, so...
Yeah, and I see you brought
Astor Grey to open for you.
Speaking of stupid girls...
-[DJ laughs]
-No, she's, um...
-she's great.
-Yeah, honestly,
I never heard of her before.
Yeah, I really only
brought her on tour
because she gets naked at shows.
Is she gonna get naked tonight?
Honestly, I... I don't even think
she brought clothes
on this trip.
[DJ laughs] Hey, man,
it's been so good
talking to you.
Can't wait for the show tonight.
Uh, Brendon Verge,
tonight at the Tempodrom,
Astor Grey is opening.
Naked. [Laughs]
-[humming]
-[guitar strumming softly]
Guten Abend, Berlin. [Chuckles]
What's up, Berlin?
[in different accentuation]
What's up, Berlin?
I'm Astor Grey. Hey, hey, hey.
Hey, I'm Astor Grey.
GRETA: Hey, this is it.
You ready?
[chuckles]
Was ist das?
Hey, everybody. I'm Astor Grey,
and the only word I know
how to say in German
is Wienerschnitzel.
[audience booing]
-Zieh deine Sachen aus!
-[guitar strumming]
MAN 1: Take off your clothes!
Take off your clothes!
Show us your boobies!
[men shouting in German]
MAN 1: Go back to California!
[crowd booing]
No groupies on the bus.
ASTOR: Are you kidding me?
I'm with the band.
My bad.
Beer?
-Back to your old ways?
-[Brandyn scoffs]
Alcohol isn't the problem.
It's people.
You know, my therapist says that
I subconsciously create distance
from those I love,
so it doesn't hurt when
they eventually let me down.
'Cause they always will.
Or maybe...
you're just a sad,
angry piece of sh*t.
What the f*ck?
Hey, can we stop, please?
-Can you please pull over?
-NIC: I can't stop here.
No, we need to stop right now,
okay? All my songs are
back there, so we need
to stop right now, please.
Looks like there's a petrol
station a few kilometers ahead.
I can probably stop there.
Nic, keep going. It's all good.
Brandyn, that is the only copy
that I have of all those songs.
Can you please just
not be a d*ck about this?
Wait, I'm sorry, am I a d*ck,
or am I
"an angry piece of sh*t?"
Okay, keep going.
-Bus is leaving.
-Great, I won't be on it.
So what am I supposed to do now?
ROSEMARY: If you want people
to treat you like an adult,
that means taking responsibility
for yourself and your choices.
Seriously? Mom, I'm, like, stuck
at a gas station in Germany.
I hope you don't feel
too bad when I get m*rder*d
-by f*cking Nazis. [Sobs]
-Baby...
Germany is a very safe country,
and you're one of
the bravest people I know.
Do you have
your calming lavender blend?
I don't feel brave.
This sucks, and I wanna go home.
I know you're
feeling overwhelmed,
but, Astor,
just try to think about
why you went there
in the first place.
You're on tour in Europe, baby.
You're playing your music
for the world.
Now fight for what you want,
what you deserve.
You have always had
this fire inside you.
If you want something,
you succeed.
Now get off this phone
and call an Uber,
and use your lavender.
Okay.
Okay, you're right.
Let me figure it out.
Thanks, Mom, I love you.
[sobbing]
I'm sorry.
I'm gonna make you proud.
I am already so proud.
No one deserves this
more than you, Astor.
You worked so hard.
I love you more than words.
[sobbing]
["Woman At Best" by
Scout laRue Willis playing]
I'm a woman at best
You do not make me weak
Won't fall to my knees
Call your name in my sleep
And I will pass this test
'Cause I know I am strong
Won't call out your name
I just sing out this song
Sing out this song
Sing out this song...
[crowd cheering]
This song is about
Brandyn Verge.
He hates women.
["See Me Cry" playing]
Crawling out a car crash,
I hold my breath
Baby, if I'm bleeding,
I don't feel it yet
I know you love to see me
at my worst
You've been playing
with my feelings
On and on, on and on, oh
You cut deep
You don't see me anymore
I won't give you
the satisfaction
Or pretend like
it never happened
Oh
You don't keep me
up at night
You don't get to
say goodbye, no
You don't get to fix me
And break me
at the same time
You don't get to see me cry
You don't get to see me cry
I got them
all warmed up for you.
You are gonna
f*cking pay for that!
I promise you,
you're gonna f*cking pay.
-God damn it!
-Hey!
You're f*cking done.
-Over.
-I'm just getting started.
Brandyn, go! Go!
-Astor, stop.
-[laughs]
Stop!
You're in dressing room five,
all right?
-All right?
-Yeah.
So, after I played
this k*ller show,
Greta came into
the dressing room and fired me.
She'd already bought
the ticket home.
Can they do that?
After reading the contract
a million times,
the answer seems to be
yes and no.
Kate thinks that
they're gonna have to pay me,
but that we'll
have to fight for it.
But I don't know.
Things feel different now.
Like,
there's these girls in Denmark
that were singing along
to all my songs,
and they were wearing t-shirts
with my face on it.
It was, like, so freaking cool.
You're a rock star.
-I'm a rock star?
-[Noelle chuckles]
Don't actually look at me.
["Stupid Guy" playing]
Emotional editor
What the f*ck?
You think you're really fly
But you're just a stupid guy
Your Porsche
is not your p*nis
Women really aren't
from Venus
I laugh, but I cry
'Cause you're
such a stupid guy
All you want is admiration
Your real emotion
is stagnation
Do the stupid thing
you love...
Oh, my God, you're slow!
[both laughing]
What you really are
-[Astor chuckles]
-It's fantastic!
I love it!
And can I just
say how happy I am
that you picked that
as the single?
Thanks. Yeah, Hobie he chose it.
Well, it's a fantastic song.
[laughs]
I'm so excited for Saturday.
I think I actually prefer
playing smaller venues.
Like, having more money
would be nice,
but not at the expense
of the acoustics and my sanity.
Well, this is
the other reason I called.
Guess what finally came in.
-Oh, my God, did they pay?
-The lawyers did their job.
They paid, plus a late fee.
-Oh, my gosh!
-[both laugh]
Thank you so much!
Well, you deserve it.
Here's to taking on
shitty men and winning.
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
There's a lot of hate
towards you from Brandyn's fans.
People saying you're pissed
you got dumped,
that you're using this story
to promote your record.
Yeah, and it got a lot worse
after your podcast last week.
[chuckles] Well,
Brandyn's a good friend,
and the guy I know, well,
I got a hard time
believing that he's doing
these things
you're accusing him of.
Yeah, it's easy
to excuse shitty behavior
when it's coming from
someone that we like, but
women's careers don't benefit
from calling out powerful men.
-It's usually the opposite.
-I'd never heard of you before.
Brandyn took you on his tour, a
tour which you were fired from.
So it seems naive
to pretend that Brandyn
didn't give your career
a huge boost.
People know my name now,
that's true,
and I will take
some accountability
for the f*cked-up situation.
I should have left sooner,
but I was in love.
Well, I'm glad to hear
you're taking some of the blame.
It takes two to play the game.
The thing is, I didn't think
that I was playing the game.
I thought that I was
in a relationship.
Oh, come on. I mean,
Brandyn's a rock star,
and you... I mean,
you seem like a smart cookie.
You really expect me
to believe that you thought
he was gonna be
your typical boyfriend?
Yes, I did, because
that's how he presented himself.
We let these celebrities
break the rules
and get away with it
because we want them
to be bad boys,
and defending their behavior
is a way of protecting
the rock star fantasy.
If you object,
then you're a whiny b*tch
who's ruining the party
with your wokeness.
Okay, okay,
let's not put words in my mouth.
I never called you
a whiny b*tch.
No, you called me a liar.
I mean, you're trying to
take something from Brandyn
that he's worked
his entire life for,
and in my book,
that's just wrong.
Well, your book is bro code.
[chuckles]
You're funny.
ASTOR: No, but seriously,
I don't want Brandyn's name
as an asterisk on my career,
and I don't expect him to change
or even acknowledge this,
but if we could start to have
more conversations
about all the bullshit
that women have to put up with:
the abuse, the lack of pay,
the lack of opportunity,
then I think that would be
a really good place to start.
I'm here for that,
but can we cut
the cancel culture sh*t?
Astor, thank you
for coming on the show.
We may not agree on much,
but I admit,
you got some ba*ls.
My album's called
The Whisper Network.
Check it out,
and if you're in LA,
I am playing Silverlake Lounge
this Saturday.
HUXLEY: And there you have it,
for a little
shameless self-promotion.
Astor Gray,
it has been an experience.
Check you out, Astor Gray.
What are you doing here?
We're playing at
the Forum tomorrow night.
I saw that you were playing,
so I wanted to come support you.
Well,
make sure you buy a t-shirt.
BRANDYN: I will.
Yeah, I can't tell if
you're happy to see me or not.
Well...
considering you threw
my songs out the window
and then you fired me
from your tour,
I'm gonna go with not.
Look at you now.
Obviously your new songs
are so much better
than whatever
was in that notebook.
Guess we'll never know.
You know, music producers
use unorthodox methods
of getting great performances
out of artists all the time.
Phil Spector pulled
a g*n on John Lennon.
He also shot
a woman in the face.
So, um, what's your plan
with these, um...
with these interviews?
You going on Hux, The Times?
I didn't think
you'd stoop so low.
It's... it's kind of sad.
The Times came to us.
Your reputation
precedes me, dude.
Music is the only thing
that I care about,
and you're trying to
take that away from me?
I mean, I'm sorry if
sh*t got too real for you.
Yeah, it's crazy
how being an a*usive f*ck
just isn't a great
career move anymore.
Why are you doing this?
I loved you.
I paid off
your f*cking credit card bills.
So many of my songs on
my new album are about you.
And this is my thanks?
Yeah, I think you're
gonna see your influence
on my album as well.
So that's it? After everything?
I'm not afraid of you, Brandyn.
And I'm not gonna be quiet.
I'm gonna tell my story,
and I'm gonna play my music.
And if you don't like that,
I have a great lawyer now,
so you can sue me.
ANNOUNCER: How is
everybody feeling tonight?
Are you guys ready
for the main act?
[sighs] Get out of my way.
Astor.
Astor! Hey!
Seriously?
ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen,
put your hands together...
b*tch!
For the lovely
and amazing Astor Grey!
[crowd cheering]
LA, I love you!
["Lost On You" by LP playing]
When you get older,
plainer and saner
And will you remember
all the danger we came from
Burning like embers,
falling tender
Long before
the days of no surrender
Years ago
And will you know
So smoke 'em if you got 'em,
'cause it's going down
All I ever wanted was you
I'll never get to heaven
'cause I don't know how
Let's raise a glass or two
To all the things
I lost on you
Oh-oh
Tell me are they lost on you
Oh-oh
Just like you could
cut me loose
Oh, after everything
I lost on you
Is that lost on you
Oh-oh
Oh
Is that lost on you
Oh, oh-oh
Baby, is that lost on you
Is that lost on you
Is that lost on you
["See Me Cry" playing]
Crawling out a car crash,
I hold my breath
Baby, if I'm bleeding,
I don't feel it yet
I know you love to see me
At my worst
You've been playing
with my feelings
On and on, on and on, oh
You cut deep,
you don't see me anymore
I won't give you
the satisfaction, no
Or pretend like
it never happened
You don't keep me up
at night
You don't get
to say goodbye, no
You don't get to fix me
And break me
at the same time
You don't get to see me cry
You don't get to see me cry
Cry, cry
[somber music]
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Off the Record (2025)
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