01x04 - I Hate This Thing

[bunniefuu]

Kate and Matt.

- Mark. - Oh, Mark.

Who'd like to go first?

OK.

Basically I kissed someone.

I was drunk. It meant nothing.

And I apologised a thousand times.

And I accept his apology and people make mistakes,

but mistakes have consequences.

I mean, how would he feel if I did this to him?

Really interesting question, Kate.

How would he feel if I did this to him?

I want you both to try something.

I want you to swap seats.

Kate, you're Matt.

- Mark. - Mark. Mark, you're Kate.

This is just a game, but it's also a great way to see

everything from each other's perspective.

Are you willing to give it a try?

So, Kate, describe your relationship.

Me?

Oh, my relationship with Mark?

That's right.

Yeah, well, I mean, we live together.

She's my girlfr... He's my...my...she's my girl...

Sorry, I don't think I understand.

- Mark, why don't you go first? - Sure.

My name is Mark.

I was in a pretty wonderful relationship for almost four years

until I decided to set it on fire.

I didn't decide anything, Kate.

Uh, Mark.

Sorry?

That's Mark. You're Kate.

Go on, Mark.

I wasn't thinking about my girlfriend because I don't really respect her.

Obviously.

- Come on. - I'm selfish.

Mark, describe the incident.

I was at work drinks

and I remember kissing some girl from marketing,

and who knows what else I did because I have a drinking problem?

I see. Mm.

Kate, how do you respond to this?

Yeah, thank you for telling me, Mark.

I...I appreciate your honesty.

It was a totally meaningless kiss.

Well, I definitely wouldn't be psychotic about it.

- Let's move on. - I would never say that.

I hear your anger. Um...

I think it might be easier for you to see Mark's point of view

if you were one step further removed.

Um, switch places with me.

I'll be you.

Uh...

I'm you, you're me?

- Who, am I? - You're still me, Mark.

- You're still Kate. - I'm still Kate.

- Take the reins, Joanne. - Who's Joanne?

Oh, that's my...your name.

I'm Joanne.

You're Kate, you're Mark.

Thank you, Joanne. Thank you so much for seeing us at such short notice.

I know how busy you are.

Do you mind if I go first, Kate?

Please.

See, the thing is, Joanne, I'm in pain.

I've hurt the person I value most in the world.

And although it was meaningless, it was still a betrayal.

Yes, exactly.

That's exactly how you feel, isn't it, Kate?

I mean, yes?

But if I look at it, what I did

might be the symptom of a relationship in distress,

not the cause.

How do you mean?

Well, I get the feeling that Kate is terrified

of having her heart broken again.

Yeah.

And my stupid mistake was proof I was gonna leave.

Yeah, I'm...I'm afraid of being abandoned.

Sometimes, I get the feeling you're punishing me for things

I haven't even done yet.

Yes. Yeah, I punish you for nothing all the time.

You're always testing the strength of our relationship,

waiting for everything to fall apart.

Yeah, but it won't.

It won't.

But what do I know?

You're the world-famous therapist.

Is there any hope for us?

Doesn't excuse what you did, Mark?

- Not at all. - And it depends.

Do you still love Kate?

- He does. - Very much.

And, Kate, what about you?

Well, I don't want to throw all this away.

You have to believe me.

I'm so sorry.

Sorry for what?

For cheating.

You cheated on me?

You know I did.

You know I did.

Kate, what the hell are you talking about?

Oh, I'm still Kate. Sorry.

- Wh-wh-whoa. When? - Two weeks ago.

Wait, so you, dragged me to couples counselling

because I "set the relationship on fire"

but the whole time you've been doing the same thing?

I think...I think what Mark is trying to say is...

No, no, no, no. Do not speak for me, please.

Nobody speaks for Mark.

Wait, you cheated on me?

- Yeah, but... - Well, who is it?

- Do I know him? - Her.

It's a woman? Wait, wait. So...you're bi now?

What? No.

I think there's a been a misunderstanding.

I'll say. How is this helping? What kind of therapist are you?

- I'm not a therapist. - You're not a therapist?

Are you serious? [GASPS] I think I'm having a panic attack.

Wait, wait, so this... this whole-whole thing

is just some big, elaborate lie?

[STAMMERS] I thought it was a game.

This is a game to you, Joanne.

What kind of sick freak, are you?

Hey, don't talk about her like that.

What, you think you're better than me

with your diplomas and your stupid books that you haven't even read.

Oh, oh.

I never loved you. Can you hear me up there on your high horse?

I-I SETTLED for you.

I looked around at my life and I thought, you know what?

Matt...Mick...MARK, it's closing time.

And if this is the best I can do, then fine!

So here it is.

Here is what you've been willing me to say since the beginning.

I'm leaving you. I am leaving you.

And I hope I never have to see your stupid face again till the day I die!

- Mark? - What?

Remember when you were in Bolivia

and Kate wanted to go on a tour of that silver mine?

You're claustrophobic.

But Kate insisted.

"Live a little," she said.

And it was 100 degrees down there

and you had to crawl, and parts of it had caved in.

Do you remember what happened?

Kate freaked out.

She couldn't breathe.

And the tour guide wouldn't stop the tour, so...

..you took her hand and you found your own way out of there.

And it was scary under there.

Underground.

Almost as scary as being in love.

You've both made mistakes.

Neither one of you is perfect.

But if this world is that crumbling silver mine in Bolivia...

..there's only one person that you want there with you.

Mark?

Yes, Kate?

Marry me?

Er, really?

She's right.

It's you and me.

What do you say?

[ALARM BEEPS]

Oh, that's all the time we have.

You're a god.

No, no, I'm just Joanne.

OK.

Oh, I've just got to grab my bag.

Thank you...

..Joanne.

You're welcome.

I just got this.

- Still figuring it out. - [BIRDSONG]

Um, does that sound nice?

- [GENTLE MUSIC PLAYS] - No?

- Oh, what about the... No. - [CRICKETS CHIRRUP]

[WATER TRICKLES]

Oh, that's nice.

It sounds like someone's pissing in the bush.

Uh...

I think I will go.

Where?

The Daintree.

Oh, you changed your mind?

You'll get dengue.

Yeah.

I figure, life's short, so I should live it more.

Yeah, dengue will shorten it.

And how are you feeling this week?

Uh, well...I haven't cried inside the cleaner's cupboard

or the Macca's drive-through.

What about Bunnings?

And Moana?

I chose not to put myself through it.

- Well, that's great to hear. - Yeah.

You said some things last week that I think we need to unpack.

Oh...

I'm not a m*rder*r, if that's what you think.

No, let's talk more about your Bubu Agnes.

- Am I saying that right? - Yeah, it's fine.

These white people, they can say words like quiche,

but are too scared to pronounce 'bubu'.

Would you be open to sharing more about her?

Uh...sure.

What did you wanna know?

Well, it sounds like she was a big part of your life.

She was.

She helped raise me.

Used to take you to the markets with me almost every Sunday.

She used to take me to the markets with her every Sunday.

I'd have to bribe you with fish and saksak though.

She used to always make me fish and sago.

That's my favourite dish.

You always helped me to look so pretty.

She's so funny.

She didn't trust any of the hairdressers,

so I would have to be the one that would dye her hair jet black.

AND she would make me put a flower in her hair every week.

You were a good girl, Betty.

You made me so very happy.

It's OK, Betty. It's OK to cry.

I'm just...

I'm just really sorry.

What are you sorry for?

I should have...

I should've called you that morning and told you I wasn't gonna make it.

I was supposed to take you with me to the markets that Sunday,

but I slept in.

And I...I should have been there.

I didn't know what was going to happen.

I could've called the ambulance when you had the heart attack,

I could've done something.

BOTH: There's nothing you could have done.

I'm just...I'm just really sorry.

Please forgive me.

I never blamed you.

You need to stop blaming yourself.

Your bubu loves you.

You are the sunshine of my life.

I want you to focus on your breathing, Betty.

Breathe in.

And then out.

Now, shift your attention to something in the room.

The best thing we can do, as their loved ones,

is to live a life that they'd be proud of.

[RECORDED WATER TRICKLES]

I hate this f*cking thing.

What do you think your Bubu Agnes would say if she were here?

[ELECTRICAL CRACKLING]

- [LAUGHS] - Sorry.

It's new.

- I'll be returning it. - You should.