02x17 - The Vamp-Opera/This Haunted House Is Closed

[bunniefuu]

♪ Vampirina ♪

♪ We were normal vampires
In Transylvania ♪

♪ Like the other monsters
On every block ♪

♪ Till we packed our things
And we flapped our wings ♪

♪ And we got a case
Of human race culture shock ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

♪ I may be blue
With pointy teeth ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

♪ But I'm not so different
Underneath ♪

♪ It's true that our taste
May be a little offbeat ♪

♪ But we're the battiest
Monsters you'll ever meet ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

♪ A ghoulish girl
In a human world ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

♪ It may seem strange
But it's true ♪

♪ I'm just like you ♪

♪ Whoa, oh, oh, Vampirina ♪

[Vampirina]
"Vamp-Opera".

♪ Stringy cheese ♪

♪ I love pulling you apart ♪

♪ Stringy cheese ♪

♪ You're a cheesy shot
To my heart ♪

[all laugh]

That was really bad.

So bad. Stringy cheese?

I know.
I couldn't think of anything else.

[all giggle]

But the block party
is tomorrow night,

and we promised everyone
a brand-new song.

I know. We just don't seem to be
coming up with anything good.

There was that one good one.

You mean,
"Popcorn stuck in my teeth"?

Oh. Yeah. Not that good.

-Plus, it made me want to floss.
-[sighs]

Guess we have a monster-sized
case of songwriter's block.

What are we going to do?

The whole neighborhood is coming,
and we promised them a new song.

Wish we could just do
one of those spell-a-majiggy's

-to get a new song to sing.
-Good idea.

We've had some...
you know, problems in the past.

True, but I did love when you
accidentally gave us horns.

Okay, I didn't.

But this is just one little
original but catchy song.

How hard could that be?

I guess we're going to find out.

I just don't see a perfect spell
for writing a perfect song.

Hmm, well, I hate to do it,
but I could do a hybrid spell.

What's a hybrid spell?

It's when you put two spells together.

I know they're supposed
to be kind of hard to control, but...

I saw two that might work.

This one's a spell that makes
your enchanted songbird more musical.

[tweets]

And this puts a spell on your bedroom
furniture to tell you a bedtime story.

"Once upon a scream..."

Well, let's do it.

Tell your story from squawk to sing.

Let this spell spook everything.

Everything.

That's for a spell about furniture.

Everyone?

Yeah. Everyone.

♪ Try coming up
With a song now ♪

Huh.

♪ That felt strange somehow ♪

♪ How can we rock ♪

♪ With an epic case
Of writer's block? ♪

♪ Our songwriting's
Way too t*rd ♪

♪ To be ready
For the big block party ♪

♪ What is going on? ♪

♪ Why does everything we say
End up coming out in song? ♪

♪ Did I mess up
This old spell? ♪

♪ Yes, I must have
Done it wrong ♪

♪ And now one thing here
Is clearly indisputable ♪

♪ I have made the world into ♪

♪ A great big musical ♪

♪ A musical ♪

Wait, what?

♪ So the whole wide world's
A musical? ♪

♪ All my dreams
Are coming true ♪

♪ Will you tell me, tell me
Pretty please ♪

♪ Will I get a pony too? ♪

♪ I really
Really doubt that ♪

♪ Me too ♪

♪ But honestly, for reals ♪

♪ What are we gonna do? ♪

♪ Demi ♪

♪ Gregoria ♪

♪ The ghostest
With the mostest ♪

♪ Has appeared at your behest ♪

♪ So tell me, Vee
Just you to me ♪

♪ What's your monsterific
Request? ♪

♪ What's going on here? ♪

♪ What was that? ♪

♪ And that ♪

♪ And that, and that
And that, and that ♪

♪ Sing it, sister ♪

♪ This is getting scary ♪

♪ What'd you do to make me sing
Like a spooky stone canary? ♪

♪ I was trying out a spell
I thought I'd do it well ♪

♪ It didn't go exactly
As I planned ♪

♪ I may have modified it ♪

♪ The spell, it was a hybrid ♪

♪ Now singing is the only way
To make you understand ♪

♪ A hybrid, a hybrid ♪

♪ What's a hybrid again? ♪

♪ Just asking for a friend ♪

♪ It's when two spells combine ♪

♪ And come out doubly strong ♪

♪ They're twice as tough
To break ♪

♪ So we're doomed
To speak in song ♪

♪ Doomed, doomed
To a lifetime stuck in rhyme ♪

♪ Could be, unclear ♪

♪ A day, a week, a year ♪

♪ Or it might disappear ♪

♪ Now that it's bedtime ♪

♪ Bedtime ♪

♪ Boop-be-doopy-doo ♪

♪ I thought that you could use
A little backup ♪

♪ And we could have
A nice duet ♪

♪ What do you think? ♪

♪ Here's a fact ♪

♪ This gargoyle's a solo act ♪

♪ Now, as I said
It's time for bed ♪

♪ And maybe
By the break of dawn ♪

♪ We will wake up
And the spell will be gone ♪

♪ Gone ♪

Demi, focus.

♪ We've got to wait out
This hocus-pocus ♪

♪ Gone ♪

♪ And that's no joke-us ♪

♪ Let's get some sleep ♪

♪ And in the morning
We will speak ♪

♪ Gone ♪

Demi, please.

Good night.

♪ Uppity uppity, up ♪

-♪ You sang ♪
-♪ He sang ♪

-♪ I sang ♪
-[all] ♪ We sang ♪

♪ This spell, this spell
We're still under the spell ♪

♪ My plan to fix this mess
It didn't go so well ♪

♪ It's time to face
The music ♪

♪ And get us back
To talking ♪

♪ We've got to tell
Your parents ♪

♪ Let's get to walking ♪

♪ Mama and Papa ♪

♪ I have to tell you something ♪

♪ What is it, batkins? ♪

♪ Why are we singing? ♪

♪ Oh, no, this spell came out
Stronger than I could tell ♪

[both]
♪ Darling, what spell? ♪

♪ I tried my hand
At a hybrid spell ♪

♪ And now it seems
You're singing too ♪

[howls]

♪ Sacre bleu ♪

♪ Gosh, they're hard to undo ♪

♪ But don't worry, batkins
The spell can reverse ♪

♪ We'll fix this most powerful
Curse ♪

♪ That sounds fangtastic ♪

♪ But, please
Breakfast first ♪

♪ How about some lox
And scream cheese? ♪

♪ Oh, I'd really love some
Thank you, please ♪

♪ No, not for you
These are Vee's ♪

♪ I don't mean
To bring you down ♪

♪ Or to be the malcontent ♪

♪ But I feel a sense of doom
Way down deep in my cement ♪

♪ We have a problem ♪

[all]
♪ We know ♪

♪ I'm not the only one ♪

♪ Who's stuck in song ♪

♪ It's worse than
We all thought ♪

♪ You should hear my mom ♪

♪ Hear your mom ♪

-♪ Oh, no ♪
-♪ Oh, no ♪

[all]
♪ Oh, no, oh, no ♪

♪ She doesn't seem aware ♪

♪ Of all the songs and melodies
That fill the air ♪

♪ Hello, neighbors ♪

♪ Hello, Edna ♪

♪ Are you getting ready
For the block party tonight? ♪

♪ I am cooking something
That is sure to be a fright ♪

♪ Wait, not Edgar? ♪

♪ Yes, Edgar ♪

♪ I'm making a video
To show behind the scenes ♪

♪ And if I'm really lucky ♪

♪ I will catch
Some monster screams ♪

♪ That hybrid spell
Was not fooling around ♪

♪ I really hope it didn't hit
The whole entire town ♪

[both]
♪ The whole entire town ♪

[all chant]

♪ Every day ♪

♪ Another catalogue ♪

♪ Every day ♪

♪ Another barking dog ♪

-[barking]
-♪ What a day ♪

♪ Nothing can go wrong ♪

[laughs]

♪ It's like life is a song ♪

[barks]

♪ Leash your beast ♪

♪ Dribble and swish ♪

♪ I could sure go
For a nice knish ♪

[all]
♪ Hear the tune ♪

♪ Playing sweet and strong ♪

♪ It's like life is a song ♪

♪ Hey, girls
I'm getting giddy ♪

♪ Can't wait to hear
Your brand-new diddy ♪

♪ And I feel so tippy tappy ♪

♪ I don't know why
But I'm just so happy ♪

[all]
♪ So happy ♪

♪ Bats and frogs
Things are less than fine ♪

♪ Our neighborhood's become
A chorus line ♪

[all] ♪ Let's join hands
And dance and sing along ♪

♪ It's like life is a song ♪

♪ It's like life is a-- ♪

♪ All right, enough
That's more than I can stand ♪

♪ If this goes on much longer
I'll be dreaming in jazz hands ♪

♪ Vee, since you're the one
Who thought to brew it ♪

♪ You're the only one
Who can undo it ♪

♪ Can you tell me
What would happen ♪

♪ If I blew it? ♪

♪ You don't want to know ♪

♪ Well, ready set, let's go ♪

♪ A smidge of this
A drop of that ♪

♪ The right amount of fright ♪

♪ I'll surely be a brainy bat ♪

♪ I hope I get this right ♪

♪ I'll say in the clearest
Vampirese ♪

♪ With this drop I ask for
No more singing, please ♪

[all]
♪ No more singing, please ♪

[clears throat]

Check one, two, three.

Is this thing working?

I'm talking!

♪ You're fabulous ♪

-[all gasp]
-Oh, no.

But you're still singing.

Ahem, no. Just got excited there
and, you know,

sometimes that makes my voice
get a little trilly.

Hello?

Ah, the sound of my own voice.

I will tell you,
that is music to my ears.

Great job with the potion, batkins.

[Edna]
Boris? Oxana?

Vee?

Anyone home?

Oh! You startled me.

We like to be welcoming.

Just wanted to see if everyone
was ready for the block party.

I just can't wait to hear
you girls sing.

Sing?

You have a new song,
don't you?

You did promise everyone something
other than, "Living the Scream".

Man, that song is sticky.

You know,
we do have a new song.

-Really?
-We do?

You know, we were kind of
having a hard time

coming up with a new song.

Just a little bit.

But we realized you can make
a song out of anything.

[playing]

♪ We were stuck
Without a tune to share ♪

♪ Till we learned
There's music everywhere ♪

♪ All you got to do
Is sing along ♪

♪ Because life is a song ♪

[all]
♪ Because life is a song ♪

[crowd cheering]

[Demi]
Go, Ghoul Girls!

[Vampirina]
"This Haunted House Is Closed".

Thank you so much for staying
at our Scare B and B.

Come again soon.

-[both] Whoo!
-It's nice having humans stay,

but my wings are worn out
from hiding all the spooks.

No time to rest.

Our next round of guests
are all monsters,

so it's time to re-spook
the B and B.

Finally. I need to get this
human food out of my kitchen.

What else do we have to do,
Mama?

We have to re-hang the cobwebs,

re-creak the stairs,
put dust in every room.

Don't forget to put eyeballs
on all the pillows

and wash the sheets.

Ah! Wait!
I may be soft and snuggly,

but I do not belong
in the washing machine.

Oh, and don't forget to add
the coffin softener too. Really nice.

Oh! We really have a lot to do
before our monster guests arrive.

Don't worry, Mama.
We'll all help.

Vee's right. We can put the scare
back in Scare B and B in no time.

Then let's get spooking.

-[doorbell rings]
-Ah! What was that awful sound?

Jumpy human guests require
a human-friendly doorbell.

Another thing we have to re-spook.

Gobliny greetings,
Hauntleys.

I am Griff Gooberton.

I'm a spooksperson from the Transylvania
Haunted House Commission.

It is time for your haunted house test.

A haunted house test? What's that?

All Scare B and B's must pass a test

of spooks and scares
once a century to stay open.

And our test is today? As in now?

Indeed.
The tests are always a surprise.

They jump out at you,
like a good spook.

Ah!

Yep, that was surprising.

Excuse us for just one moment.

[laughs nervously]

This is a bat-tastrophe.

Boris, did you order the spook-splies
from Tombs and Tubs?

You see, batty-boo,
I was put under a spell, and--

Oh, bats. That's not true. I forgot.

Oh, frogs and fangs. So did I.

I'm sure our house has enough
spooks and scares

to pass a haunted house test.

Our house is plenty haunted.

Every day is a spook and a scare
for me living with this ghost.

Oh, you love me.
You really love me.

All we have to do is go out there
and show Griff what we've got.

Vee's right. Keep calm
and scary on, as I like to say.

You're right. Let's go.

Mr. Gooberton, right this way
to our very haunted living room.

Allow me to create the "zombiance".

-[playing]
-As you can see,

we've got haunted ghosts,
haunted pianos,

and haunted portraits-- Aah!

-Great ghouls! What is that?
-Sorry.

That was left over
from our human guests.

But we do have haunted plants.
Oh!

We didn't get around
to re-spooking Penelope yet.

[scoffs]

Maybe we should show you
our creepy kitchen.

Yes?

Bonjour.

Welcome, Mr. Gooberton.

It is an honor... for you...
to step into my haunted kitchen.

We will see.

The haunted part
is for me to decide.

No, no! Stop!
Do not open the fridge.

-I have not cleaned out all--
-[gasps]

Human food?

Including a horrifying amount
of macaroni and cheese.

Yes, well, you see,

I usually have spookghetti,
scream cheese, and--

There is nothing haunted
about this menu.

[scoffs]

Hmm. No ghosts in the walls?

Ah! I missed my cue!

Boo!

I had one job to do and I blew it.

No mummies in the closet.

We have a great house mummy,
Manny.

But I gave him the weekend off.

If there's one haunted house
thing we definitely have,

-it's creaky floors.
-[stairs creaking]

It's true.
I can never sneak down the stairs

for a piece of scareberry pie unnoticed.

No creak. Not even a squeak.

That one must be a little sticky.

This ghost is on it.

[yelps]

Did I get a creak?

More like an "eek".

The downstairs needs
some mummifications.

Let's hope the haunts
really horrify upstairs.

Oh, this haunted house test
isn't going well at all.

What happens
if we don't pass the test?

Oh, I'm not sure.

All I know is I'm--

Oh! Feeling very batty.

Hold on, Griff hasn't seen
the whole house yet.

Leave it to me.

-[gust of wind]
-Ooh.

So far, so ghoul.

A little ghoul fog always makes our guests
feel hauntingly comfy.

Fangtastic, batkins.

Is this what you call
an under-the-bed monster?

Sorry. That's another thing
left over from our human guests.

They sure love pink and fuzzy.

I can assure you that everything
else in our guest room is spook-on.

Then why is that shadow so...

-[panting]
-...ugh, adorable?

-[barks]
-[Vampirina] That's Wolfie.

Our pet werewolf.

But he's so small and, ugh, cute.

[laughs]

You see,
since this is Pennsylvania,

Wolfie has to stay in dog form
most of the time.

Don't want to scare the neighbors.

[barking]

Interesting. Oh!

Very interesting.

All right, the final portion
of your haunted house test:

the backyard.

This we've got.

Right over here we have Mama's
famous snapping monster pods.

They're extra nippy.

Yep. They're nippy, all right.

Hmm.

Huh, what is that?

Whoops. That was also left over
from the humans.

We want them to feel right at home.

We've been busy as bats,
as you can see.

All I see is that human waving at us.

Hi, Vee. I'll be over
for band practice tomorrow.

Oh, my, my, my, my.
I think I've seen enough.

Are you sure you don't want
to see more, Mr. Gooberton?

We've got a haunted dungeon
full of spooks.

And I've got haunts for days.

Boo! Shriek! Spook! Splat!
Roar! Eek!

-[giggles]
-[door opens]

I regret to say you have failed
the haunted house test.

There's simply too much human
and not enough haunt.

[all gasp]

You have until the full moon
to re-spook your house,

or your B and B will be closed for good.
Hmph!

[Oxana]
Our spookiful B and B closed?

Forever?

Oh, no. Wolfie always does
that the night of the--

[all]
Full moon!

That hardly gives us any time.

Then let's get our feet moving.

Well, you know, everybody else
who's not made of stone can get moving.

Can we get it all re-spooked by tonight?

Well, we'll need some spook-plies,
but let's see.

Bats! The mummies can't be here
until tomorrow.

The creaky floorboards and the
spooky shadows are out of stock.

And the monster food
won't arrive until the morning.

But we need those things
to pass the test.

We'll have to tell our guests
their reservations have been canceled.

Griff will be back soon enough
to close our doors for good.

[typing]

There.

Our Scare B and B is officially...

closed.

Mama, Papa, does this mean
we'll have to go back to Transylvania?

Or maybe we stay and open up
a pizza shop instead?

[giggles]

Never mind.
Too much garlic for vampires.

[sobbing]
This is terrible!

I'm not sure what we'll do,
little Vee.

But remember, we're a family,

and we'll always have each other,
no matter what.

-[doorbell rings]
-Oh! My ears!

You know, we really need
to fix that.

-[doorbell screams]
-Oh, thank you.

Wait a second. Who--
Who did that?

I don't know.
It was spooky, that's for sure.

Mary-Margaret?
The Ravensons?

Narcisa? Cleo?

Our favorite Scare B and B guests.

I'm not sure if you've heard,

but we didn't pass
our haunted house test.

So we had to close our B and B.

We're afraid
we can't host any guests,

monsters or humans,
unless we pass the test.

Well,
that's exactly why we're here.

We were all so surprised when
our reservations were canceled.

My wraps were in knots about it.

We couldn't let our favorite
Scare B and B close down.

We've brought everything
a haunted house needs.

That is, if we're not too late.

We have until
the full moon tonight,

so we just might make it.

I've got plenty of spooking charms.

I have a monster-load of groceries.

And I've brought the best spooky
shadows from Transylvania.

I can't believe it.

I can.

We have the best monster guests
in the whole spooky world.

Oh, we're more than guests,
Vampirina.

Monsters are family.

We're always there for each other,
no matter what.

♪ Monsterkind is all agreed ♪

♪ When you find
A friend in need ♪

♪ You extend
A tentacle or paw ♪

♪ We are all one family ♪

♪ Bound by ghoulish unity ♪

♪ We adhere to one
Hair-raising law ♪

[all] ♪ A monster always lends
A helping claw ♪

♪ If you're in
A prickly plight ♪

♪ Don't go down
Without a fright ♪

♪ Call your friends
They'll always understand ♪

♪ Zombie, ogre
Witch or ghoul ♪

♪ They'll obey
The ghostly rule ♪

♪ We're all part of one big
Beastly band ♪

[all] ♪ A monster always lends
A helping hand ♪

[howls]

♪ Don't despair
Just wait and see ♪

♪ We'll save our favorite B and B ♪

♪ With a little spooky
Shock and awe ♪

[all] ♪ A monster always lends
A helping claw ♪

The spooks are back.

-[doorbell screams]
-Ooh, great goblins.

And I really mean goblins,
because that must be Griff.

Welcome to our Scare B and B.

Again.

[floor creaks]

Care for a flappetizer?

What do you think,
Mr. Gooberton?

My, my, my. I must say.

This is the most haunterific house
I have ever seen!

Does that mean our Scare B and B
doesn't have to close?

[howls]

[pants]

You have passed your haunted house test
with flying bats.

[bats squeak]

Your Scare B and B is back in business.

-Whoo-hoo!
-We did it!

-[all cheer]
-Wonderful news.

[all laugh]

Any chance you have an opening
for another guest?

[chuckles]

I'd love to stay.

Of course. Our home is always
open to any monster.

That's because monsters
are more than guests.

They're family, and family's
always there when you need them,

however scary or not so scary
things might be.

[all chatter]

All right, team!

[theme music playing]