03x16 - (Dub) Dream Ranker

[bunniefuu]

All right. That's it for today.

Third-years, you can go now.

First-years, you're dismissed
after everything is put away.

[HOKAZE]
Oh. Hi, Misaka. Pleasant day.

Uh... Yeah.

[MIKOTO]
Who is that?

[HOKAZE] I guess I never
properly introduced myself.

Junko Hokaze, third-year.

[MIKOTO]
From the Shokuho clique.

[HOKAZE] If I'm not mistaken, we
haven't had a chance to speak

since the Daihasei Festival.

Anyway, down to business.

There's something I've
been meaning to ask you.

You know the pair contract strap
from Handy Antenna Service?

I'm sure a fellow Gekoer
like yourself knows

how elusive it is.

Since a girl can't
get it by herself,

what's your strategy?

Uh, not sure. I'll probably--

[SHOKUHO] My, my.
Look at you two, hitting it off.

It's pretty bold of you
to flirt with one of my girls

out in the open like this.

Oh, my Queen!

I'm sorry, are you saying
we can't make small talk

without your permission?

Also, based on your
clothes, did you cut class?

[SHOKUHO] There are legitimate
reasons for a young woman

to sit out of phys ed, you know.

[MIKOTO]
But you do it constantly.

There's always an excuse
up your sleeve,

but you just don't know
how to swim, do you?

What was it again?

"Unless you're ready to
k*ll me right here and now,

then move"?

[MIKOTO gasps]

I can't believe you had
to use the bathroom that bad!

That was something you
completely made up!

[SHOKUHO] You really left
the two of them speechless.

[MIKOTO] I still can't
believe you did that to me.

[SHOKUHO]
Excuse me?

Don't forget that was
for your benefit, too.

I had a lot of covering up to
do to keep things under wraps.

There were a million other ways
you could've handled that,

and you know it!

[SHOKUHO] You should be
thanking me, not blaming me

for your personal problems!

You stay out of this!

Yes! I'm sorry for interrupting.

[MIKOTO]
I mean, really.

You could've just
left that part alone, and...

Uh...

I just remembered I have
somewhere that I have to be.

What, are you running away?
I'm not done with you--

For someone who just
finished swimming,

you still have a lot
of energy to spare,

don't you, Misaka?

How would you like
to skip lunch and use

some of that energy
to clean the pool?

It could really use it. Hmm?

No thank you.

If there's one thing she's
good at, it's starting fights.

[HOKAZE]
Misaka? I'm sorry about earlier.

I don't know if this
will make up for it,

but I'd like you to have this.

[MIKOTO]
Uh... Oh.

[HOKAZE] They've become quite
popular in our circle lately.

Huh?

[HOKAZE]
See you.

[MIKOTO]
Bye.

[MIKOTO]
What is this?

[SATEN gasps]

Awesome, you got an
Indian Poker card!

Did you say, "Indian Poker?"

Yeah.

Those cards let you see
other people's dreams.

They're not sold in stores;

you can find how
to make them online.

It's really big right now.

First, the person "providing"
the dream connects themselves

to the card fabricator
and goes to sleep.

Then, the events of
whatever dream they have

get recorded onto
a special card.

Next, whoever is
"receiving" the dream

puts the card on their
forehead and dozes off.

And bam!

Apparently, that's all it
takes for the second person

to have the same
dream as the first!

Huh?

It reacts with your brainwaves
while you're sleeping

and emits a faint
electrical signal.

Plus, there are aromatic
compounds inside the card

meant to go with the
contents of the dream.

[MIKOTO] So it uses both
electricity and smell

to reproduce the
provider's dream, huh?

[SATEN] Rumor has it that
there are a few rare people

out there who can regularly
provide "S-Rank" dreams.

Ones that are funny,
or beneficial in some way.

Y'know, dreams that
anyone would want to have.

These charismatic people
have been given the title,

"Dream Rankers." Or at least,
that's what I've heard.

Apparently, the color and
pattern of the card varies

depending on the type
of dream written to it.

Orange ones are supposed
to be enjoyable, happy dreams,

so no worries!

[MIKOTO] Well, she went
to the trouble to give it to me.

If I had the choice,
though, a horror dream

sounds more fun.

Why hello there, Sissy.

It's starting to get chilly out.

I suggest we share
a bed from now--[grunts]

[MIKOTO]
Where am I? Is this a dream?

Kinda feels like it.

[MIKOTO] K-Keroyon.
Pyonkichi. Pyonko. G--

Gekota!

[laughs]

[FROGS]
♪ La la la! ♪

I can't believe what
I'm seeing right now!

Indian Poker is
the best thing ever!

What's that?

You're going to introduce
me to the queen of the castle?

I wonder if she'll
be a frog, too.

"Queen?" Come to think of it,
I got the card from--

[SHOKUHO]
Oh?

I'm expecting a new
maid today, is that you?

[MIKOTO]
Shokuho! I knew it!

Do I look like a maid to you?

I take that back!

[SHOKUHO] Could you start by
massaging my shoulders for me?

Not on your life.

Why are you giving me
that sad look?

It's not because I'm resisting
Shokuho's orders, is it?

Ah. That feels delightful.

It really is tough being
this busty all the time.

Now, shine my shoes.

Rub some oil on me.

Fix me a cup of tea.

Why me? Why me? Why me?
Why me? Why me--[gasps]

Oh, my goodness!
That was clumsy of you.

Clumsy? The handle
came clean off by itself!

Such a little ditz.

Then again, I have to
admit that you've been

a great deal of help
around here, too.

You definitely show promise.

Which is why...

...I hereby grant you
the honor of waiting on me

for the rest of your life!

[KUROKO] Oh, Sissy, you're so
beautiful when you're asleep.

Ordinarily, this is when
I would try to wake you up

with an innocent
good morning kiss,

but I know how shy you are.

You'd shock me to try
to hide your embarrassment.

I'm so sorry Sissy,
please forgive me!

Of course you'd grow anxious
about the connection

of our hearts,
when all I do with you

is seek the physical!

Naturally, I do desire
the union of our souls,

but to have worried you
for even a moment

is my life's greatest blunder!

Allow me to quell your
worries with my sincerity

and unwavering devotion!

For the sake of proving
that my love for you

is true once and for all,

I offer my entire body and soul!

My everything!

Why would I want that?!

This is the first time
I've ever gone to sleep

and woken up even more tired.

[siren wailing]

[SATEN]
Good morning!

Morning.

Is something wrong, Shirai?
You don't look so good.

Yeah. She's been stuck
like that all morning.

[SATEN] So? How'd your
Indian Poker experience go?

It was pretty much the
worst dream I've ever had

in my entire life.

I've got goosebumps
just thinking about it.

And to think, with that color,
it was supposed to be

a fun one.

Oh! That reminds me, Misaka.

Have you heard of this app?

I found it yesterday.
It's interesting.

It's kinda like a treasure
hunt-type thing. [gasps]

Uiharu!

'Scuse me, something
important just came up.

See you later!

Uiharu!

[MIKOTO] I don't think
Indian Poker is for me.

I've already had all
I can stand of it.

So how did it go?

Did you like my
Indian Poker card?

Uh, well...

I have an idea, how would you
like to make one yourself?

[MIKOTO]
I don't know, I--

Why don't we discuss it
over tea after school

lets out today?

Uh, sure.

[SHOKUHO] So, what is she
of all people doing here?

[MIKOTO]
That's my line.

[HOKAZE]
If I'm being honest,

I thought this might be a good
opportunity to strengthen

your friendship.

[SHOKUHO, MIKOTO]
Why?

Anyway, lately we ladies
have been engrossed

in this "Indian Poker,"

which I know at least
Misaka has heard of.

[SHOKUHO]
Yes, I have as well.

[HOKAZE]
Great!

Then that makes this easy.
I'll skip the explanation.

I have invited Misaka
to join in on the fun.

Right. But I haven't--

Would you like to
participate as well?

Nope. Not interested.

You should call it off, too.

[HOKAZE]
Yes, as you wish!

Wait. Really?

Of course, my Queen
has requested it.

[SHOKUHO] Would you do me
a favor and tell the other girls

to stop doing it as well?

Yes!

I'm so sorry about this.

And after I invited
you out here, too.

[MIKOTO]
It's cool.

I mean just think about it.
It's such a childish thing to--

[FANS]
Blau!

It is an honor to
meet with you, sir!

[MIKOTO]
What the--?

[AOGAMI]
Come on, you're being too loud.

You're disturbing
the other guests here.

Ah! Sorry about that!

I'm nervous being around
a legendary S-Ranker.

There's no need
to be so tense, man.

Just take it easy.

Right. Got it!

[MIKOTO]
S-Ranker?

As in, those rare Dream Rankers
Saten was talking about?

I have to express my gratitude.

The card you gave us
the other day

was a sublime masterpiece.

I honestly felt like
I never wanted to wake up

from it!

That good?

This might not be enough,

but I'd buy it from
you right here,

or rent it if I have to!

That's okay.

You don't have to
pay me or anything.

I've been given the
chance to spread my joy

through the existence
of my dreams.

That alone is payment
enough for me.

Blau. What a guy!

[MIKOTO]
Wow.

So one of these S-Rankers
gives out his cards for free?

That's nice.

I wonder what kind of
dream could make people

as enthusiastic
as those guys are.

[FAN B]
Really, it was too much!

I mean, Iris from
the Goddess Club,

doing Full [bleep]
[bleep] [bleep]!

Supermodels, virtual idols,
you name it!

Your dreams've got 'em all!

Ordinary guys like us
couldn't even imagine

that level of detail
and realism,

but we get to live
it because of you!

[FAN A] Like getting the
weather girl, Ana Uzuki,

in her studio and forecasting
a 100 [bleep] chance

of [bleep]! It's the best!

[FAN B] Or putting pleasantly
plump glamour idol

Iruka Fugu in any outfit
we want and putting on

[bleep] show like
you've never seen!

[SARAKU] How can one man
create such incredible cards?

You're like a god!

[FAN A] My heart's pounding
just thinking about

my dream tonight, dude!

[FAN B] Your dreams are
gonna take Academy City

by storm, Blau!

Like, how could they not?
They're amazing!

[AOGAMI chuckles]

And it's not just celebrities
either, my friends.

You know those two
Level 5s from Tokiwadai?

[MIKOTO, SHOKUHO gasp]

Both of 'em are real
beauties that could put

professional idols to shame.

[FAN B]
Blau, don't tell me.

[AOGAMI]
The third-ranked, Mikoto Misaka,

seems like a pretty tough
nut to crack.

But the trick is
to [bleep] with her,

slap some cat ears
and a tail on her, [bleep],

and you can
[bleep] all night long!

As for Misaki Shokuho,
you can take a [bleep]

in a swimsuit, and take her
unreal, gigantic [bleep]

and [bleep] until
you reach Level 6!

It's [bleep].

Bro. Listen to him, it's like
he doesn't even fear god!

[SARAKU]
It's terrifying.

Ha. Those Level 5s
are nothing to me.

It's like they're wide open.
Literally.

[FANS yell]

[HOKAZE] Um, they sure do seem
excited about something.

I'm not sure what exactly,

but I thought I heard both
of your names mentioned.

But you are our
famous Level 5s, so--

One sec.

Just gotta stop by
the shop next door.

Huh? Um, I don't
trust that tone.

My Queen? Can you stop her?

We may have our differences,
but just for today

I'll alter the memories
of any witnesses for you.

[HOKAZE]
Oh, no.

If these two team up,
they could easily

commit the perfect crime.

[ALL groaning]

[HOKAZE]
Thank goodness.

They just destroyed the cards
and altered some memories.

[MIKOTO]
Honestly.

It's not like I can help it
if a person has

that kind of dream on their own.

But I draw the line at
distributing those dreams

and making it into
a public spectacle.

There's no shame in
having pleasant dreams

about the object
of your affection.

That's unavoidable
in your youth.

But to traffic them in
back-alley deals like that

is just gross.

Um, okay.

I take it that means
you two have dreams

about the gentlemen you're
interested in, then?

[SHOKUHO, MIKOTO sigh]

Oh, my.

[SHOKUHO]
Ah, I just remembered.

I have a thing I've gotta
go do about a thing. Now.

[MIKOTO]
Yeah, same.

I've got something to do,
so I'll see ya later.

[UIHARU]
Hey, Shirai. Shirai?

Anyone home? Kuroko Shirai?

Earth to Judgment's resident
reprobate, Kuroko Shirai.

[KUROKO]
Huh? What is it?

Don't forget we're
out on patrol.

Try to keep it together.

[KUROKO] What are you
doing with your phone?

I'm checking out this app Saten
told me about this morning.

Related, have you
ever heard of those

treasure hunting-type apps?

Of course.

It's why students have
been walking around

pointing their phones
at everything lately,

if I'm not mistaken.

Yeah, I'd say
that's about right.

And this app is
pretty similar to those.

But when you move
the camera around,

it doesn't show you an in-game
treasure or anything,

but the time when an accident
occurred at that location.

Someone had a fall
from here this morning,

and it's showing up now.

Luckily, it didn't end up
being anything serious,

but there's a record of it.

While that's interesting,

it's not in very
good taste, is it?

[UIHARU]
Not at all.

And if that were all
there was to this,

it'd just be misguided,

and wouldn't be worth
looking into much.

But apparently,

this app also shows
you future accidents

that haven't happened yet.

By future accidents,
what exactly do you mean?

What it sounds like.

There are a lot of locations
marked in the app,

and some of them
list times and dates

that haven't happened yet.

And then sure enough,

at the designated
time and place,

accidents, muggings,
all sorts of bad things

actually happen.

As far I know, no one's
staked out the locations yet,

but reports confirm
the incidents,

and the data turns
out to be correct,

even though it was
written way ahead of time.

Out of all these
"future" accidents,

how many actually occurred?

Because if it's one or two,
it could be coincidence.

Six incidents out of six.

One hundred percent.

So what conclusion
can we draw from this?

That someone with clairvoyance
helped create this app?

[UIHARU] That, or what people
are saying online.

They think a person,
or even a group of people

are taking the times
and locations from the app

and going out and causing
trouble themselves

so that the predictions
all come true.

Probably for kicks.

But I couldn't find any
connections between

the suspects of those incidents,
so that theory isn't very sound.

Plus, a suspicious fire broke
out in a School District 17

factory yesterday afternoon,

and there was a purse
snatching in District 16

in the evening.

Neither of those were recorded,
so there might be

some sort of rule
for what is and isn't

added to the app.

Well, fine.
Looks like we can't ignore this,

so we'll just have to conduct
a proper investigation.

Let's go find some of
this "foretold trouble."

[KUROKO] Well that was
surprisingly easy, huh?

[UIHARU]
The incident is in 15 minutes.

Does it happen in front
of these vending machines?

Considering this is
the side of the road,

it is likely to be
a traffic accident.

If we had proof this
app was the real deal,

our first move would be
to close this road off.

Yeah, but we would
never get that authorized

without some solid evidence.

And if it's a crime rather
than an accident,

it might just happen
a road over.

I guess we have
little choice, then.

Let's go observe from
a spot where we can see

the entire road.

[UIHARU]
Oh, yeah.

Training for Judgment's
summer recruitment

is almost over, isn't it?

Do you think we'll
get any new faces

at the 177th Branch?

Maybe. Guess we'll see.

I certainly hope so!

Then there'll finally be
someone lower than me!

Oh, what do I do?

What's the problem, kid?

I don't know what
I'm supposed to do

with these documents.

It's easy!
Just do this, this, and this!

Oh, wow! You know
everything, Miss Uiharu!

[laughs]

I hope they call me "Miss!"

If we do get a new recruit,
she's going to waste

all her time doting on them.

All right, enough with
your silly fantasies.

It's just about time
for this to happen.

Come on!

[STREET GIRL]
Did you see that new clerk?

They just hired him.
He's so handsome!

[KUROKO]
A crime? An accident?

Either way, I will make
sure to stop it!

[PEOPLE chattering]

[UIHARU] Well, it sure didn't
look like any of those people

were involved at all.

What gives?

We've been standing here
for ten minutes straight!

[UIHARU]
That's strange.

Oh. Apparently, some of
the listed times may be off

by dozens of minutes,
so that could be it.

[KUROKO] You could've
told me that sooner!

Or this could just be a hoax.

[KUROKO]
A truck?

But it's in the wrong lane and
isn't speeding or anything.

It doesn't appear
to be related to this.

That kid! A passing car!

Is this it?
No, the location's off!

[crash]

[KUROKO]
Are you hurt?

No. I think I'm okay.

[KUROKO]
That was close.

If I hadn't been
anticipating something,

I'm not sure I could've
made a rational decision.

I probably would've
reflexively teleported

to the boy who ran
into the street.

Uiharu!

I'm leaving traffic control
to you until Anti-Skill arrives.

Right. I've got it covered!

[KUROKO] Now, where is
the best vantage point?

Can I assume that you are
the precognitive esper?

[KUROKO]
A grade-schooler?

To be fair, you could
just be a bystander

who uses the app,
but we can figure that out

easily enough--

It's fine.
You don't need to do anything.

Your first guess was right.
I'm the creator of the app.

Don't worry, I won't run.

I had planned on making
contact with you

sooner or later, anyway.

[KUROKO] Shaei Miyama.


Age 10. Precognitive esper.

Yeah. I use this instant
camera for my power.

Which is psychic photography
that sees future events.

Right?

Yeah, pretty much.

But what shows up
is a marble pattern

that's impossible to understand.

But by running it through a
special machine they have

at the research facility, you
can make out a hazy image.

Although, it's only ever
pictures of tragedies.

And on top of that,
it only predicts accidents

in the near future.

But that much is written
in the Bank, right?

What does that mean?

There's more. Think about it.

What we've seen from
the app wouldn't be possible

with a hazy image alone.

Yeah.

I'm not sure if I should
call it a "second stage"

or something, but if
I focus my consciousness

to an even higher level,

I can make photos with
additional information.

It's just the time and
location of the tragedy,

but it's much more concrete.

Information?

[MIYAMA] The app was
originally created by a company

as an analytic tool for
psychic photography espers.

Based on the user,

It could do a lot,
like find lost items, or people.

But when I run my
"second stage" photos

through the app,
the analyzed data

is displayed on the map.

So you're circumventing
the research facility

and using the app
to decode your photos?

I suppose there's
no harm in that,

as long as you're getting
the information quicker.

[MIYAMA]
I have a request of you two.

Um, ribbon girl and flower girl.

I'm Kuroko Shirai.

Kazari Uiharu.

[MIYAMA] Shirai and Uiharu,
could you keep my second stage

a secret?

[KUROKO]
No "Miss"?

Why do you want us to do that?

If all you had was the
Bank's description,

you wouldn't think
much of my ability.

[KUROKO] But if people
knew that you could tell

the time and place as well,

they might want to
misuse your power,

which would put you
in harm's way.

Is that what you're
trying to say?

[KUROKO]
Very well.

I promise I won't speak
a word of this to anyone.

[UIHARU]
Yeah, me either.

[MIYAMA]
Thanks.

That being said, even the
secret part of my ability

isn't all that useful.

I can be anonymous with the app,
and that's one reason I use it.

But there's another.

I wanted to find an esper
who can alter the fate

of the events I predict.

[UIHARU]
Someone who can alter fate?

[SCHOOLGIRL A] Are you sure
about doing this without asking?

[SCHOOLGIRL B]
Yes. We're just making flowers.

Who's gonna get
upset about that?

It'll be fine.

I learned all about it
while I was dreaming.

[KUROKO] Use my power
to prevent the incidents

that Shaei Miyama predicts?

That's not a bad idea,

but I can't shake the feeling
he's not telling us everything.

[UIHARU] Well, Shirai, you keep
your lasciviousness hidden,

don't you?

[KUROKO] I do not keep it
hidden, it's on full display!

Wait, what did you just
get me to say, Uiharu?