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07x26 - Impotence

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Beavis and Butt-Head". Aired: March 8, 1993 – present.*
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Adult animated series follows Beavis and Butt-Head, both voiced by Judge, a pair of teenage slackers characterized by their apathy, lack of intelligence, lowbrow humor, and love for hard rock and heavy metal music.

07x26 - Impotence

Post by bunniefuu »

So call now. I'm

so lonely. Cool.

Me, um, meDoes it count if you, um, me,

you know, do it over the phone?

Uh, yeahTired of

being less than a man?The Liebowitz

Impotence Clinic may have the answer to

your problem. So go ahead and call.

Leibowitz, we make it hard the easy way.

Impotence.

Hey, put it. What is impotence?

Uh, I think he means, like, when you

can't score. Whoa, really?

I think I have that. Uh

Oh, yeah. Maybe that place can

help us score. Yeah, yeah

Yeah, we need some help. Help me. I have

impotence.

Hello, Beeve

and Butterhead. I'm

Dr. Liebowitz. My nurse tells

me that you two are having difficulty

having sex. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Can you set us up?Well, frankly, most of

the men I see are in their 40s and 50s. I

Your dad said you could help us score,

buttholeAt least give us some

phone numbers. Now calm down.

I understand how upsetting this must be

for you. Let's try to see exactly what

the problem is. Now. I'm going to run

some tests to gauge your ability to

become aroused. Cool.

Now I'm going to show you some

photographs. When you begin to feel

aroused, just raise your hand

now. Are

these pictures of the chicks we're going

to get to score with?

Yes. Well, if you find that

helps, I think that would be an excellent

way to think of them. Cool.

Bring them on.

Which lucky girls will be fit to join my

harem?

OK. Here's the

first image. Yes,

I'll take her. Yeah, yeah, me too. That's

our first dill hole.

Let's go on. Whoa.

Interesting. Beavis, why didn't you raise

your hand this time?Didn't you find the

image exciting?

Beavis's hands are busy, Sir.

Impotent yet easily aroused. This is a

very intriguing case. I'm going to need

to run some more tests.

OK, gentlemen, I'm going to show you some

more pictures. These machines will

measure your precise level of arousal.

Whoa,

OK.

ohh

I'm just gonna wait until you calm down a

little before I show you the nextpicture.

You know, I'm not gonna even bother with

the next picture. No way, hey, hey, hey,

wait, hey, wait, no, no, I'm gonna see

it, come on, come on, hey, hey, hey, damn

it. Belus, you dumbass forget the

pictures. Pretty soon we're gonna score

with a real chick. Oh, yeah, yeahOK.

Look, so far you've scored off the charts

on every arousal test I've given you, and

frankly, I'm stumped as to the nature of

your impotence. I think the next step is

to give you full physicals.

What?Just wait here. I'm going

to send the nurse in. See,

I told you, Beavis. We're going to score

with her. Yeah, you're right. It's really

going to happen.

OK, why don't you both just go ahead and

strip down to your underwear?Come to

Butthead. Yeah, yeah, yeahCome to Beavis

too. Yeah, right now.

Doctor, I am not going to touch them. You

deal with them. Beavis, you butt munch.

You scared off my chick. No way,

Butthead. She was looking at me. We're

going to do it. ButtholeOw.

Mankind needs. She was not your chick,

Butthead. She was looking at me.

Hey, Butthead. It kind of like, um,

sucked that we didn't get to score with

that chick. Yeah, kind of.

But at least now that we're not scoring

with her, we can, like, you know, do

other stuff. Yeah, like we could look at

these pictures. again. Uh, yeah.

These don't really look all that great.

Yeah, seems like they look better back in

the office. Maybe we should take more of

the saltpeter stuff. Oh yeah, yeah

Peter.