01x06 - The Way of the Bison

[bunniefuu]

[Music]

monkeys and rabbits

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

well he seems to be eating a lot better

now

carry today keeps the vet away

toothy pegs are okay

you tackle him from behind cheryl and

i'll fix him with my magic axe

since when did you have a magic axe i

had it all along

it's a big one dungeons and dragons is a

serious game

you can't just make up your own rules

you do i'm the dungeon master

i spent a fortune on my son's education

and what is he into

dragons dungeons monsters you got

something against imagination

i just don't want people to think that

my son is weird and here you are

treating a hippo for toothache

oh i think it's great nick's using the

whole zoo for his game it's like a

chessboard

we've all got parts i'm amboria

queen of the snake people fatally

attractive to any who look upon me

big deal what am i three-headed swamp

out

level two easy to k*ll

[Music]

i don't know why i'll let you talk me

into this the dungeon you are now

in contains the vampire tigers of

purista the glow from their eyes can

turn your brains into scrambled eggs

they stand before you we need a spell of

protection

that's me oh guardians of light

please give thy servants protection from

unseen forces of evil

my friends see me now i just died

their eyes are now covered can we get a

move on

suddenly their leader the mighty khan

attacks you

that's andrew don't be ridiculous

you're spoiling the game susie what's

your kid

my vampire tigers don't like smart alex

[Music]

harry harry i was just helping the kids

for their game harry

you think life is a game it's work

work you're paid to work

could you just run that past me one more

time

i don't believe in coincidences spencer

is entitled to bring visitors along

but you know he's always sniffing around

for any excuse to say we're running the

zoo and efficiently

but now he's got this girl hanging

around oh she's spying for him i'm sure

of it mitch

since the girl does nothing else but

watch the bison how much spying can she

do

figure that one out sherlock holmes

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

she's back again who is she she's been

here every day for the last week

all she does is just sit there and stare

she's the sleeping princess

yeah she might turn you to the stone

with luck

[Music]

oh we need more staff mr spencer simple

as that more efficiency bennett my motto

thomas is always right mr bennett your

visitor seems very keen she's been here

every day

i'm glad to hear it relative of yours a

friend of the family

portia oh hi nick susie morning mr

bennett

how's it going terrific i already got

two spooks and a vampire tiger

a vampire tiger games of fantasy and

imagination

they're very popular that a blasted

nonsense when i was a boy you wouldn't

find fairies at the bottom of my garden

[Music]

it's not just fantasy it's got logic

puzzles and

strategy are you listening to me i still

say it's a stupid game

they've got more imagination than you

have how'd the game go

you were my ace in the hole queen of the

snake people fail again susie

was if i care here comes a sleeping

princess

i have to give mr spencer a full report

i suppose

hey

[Music]

mr spencer's on his way to pick you up

thank you i'm sorry this happened here

well this isn't the first time it's

chronic i'm used to it

well how did it happen i'd rather not

talk about it

would you like a coffee while you're

waiting no thank you

i prolapsed this spinner protruding into

her spinal canal

it can be extremely painful at times of

course mr spencer

but i still should have been fully

informed perhaps but it's a very

delicate matter

so is the legal position of this zoo if

anyone gets hurt

we've known lisa since she was a little

girl it's not simply an injury to her

spine

is it thomas there was the young man she

was

so fond of him and he left her all alone

to fend for herself mr bennett

the girl's very depressed bennett so why

bring her here oh blasted the place

exists to make people happy doesn't it

there's so little left for her now now

surely there must be something

well the doctors have suggested an

operation a lemon

laminectomy but it's far too risky as

far as we're all concerned

she could be left a for life

how would you like to spend the rest of

your life in a wheelchair

all right i'm sorry i said she was weird

she came back this morning

she's down watching the bison again it's

none of our business susie

oh we've been treating her like a freak

all week what's the harm in saying hello

she'll probably tell us to get lost

though what i want to know why she likes

a bison so much

you're outvoted

[Music]

hi hello

how are you feeling i'm all right thank

you

i'm susie mitchell this is my brother

nick

our dad's the vet here you met him

yesterday yes

i'm tim watson hello

you've been here every day yes it's

great isn't it

sure

why do you always watch the bison it's

my business isn't it most people don't

bother to watch the animals at all

right either they just don't stop at all

or if they do they expect the animals to

do tricks or something

please why don't you leave me in peace

sorry come on yeah

sorry why are you angry i'm not angry at

you i

you said you liked the zoo i lied okay

if that's how you feel why come here

every day because the animals here are

on the way out

they're finished that's all a zoo is

a waiting room until it's your turn to

become extinct that's not true

my dad works to save animals then he

ought to teach you about reality

look at them 200 years ago there were

thousands of them

[Music]

now there's just a handful left they're

finished

maybe i like the idea i'm not the only

one it's happening to now will you leave

me alone

no you need friends everyone does i

don't need anyone

and most of all i don't need a brat like

you asking nosy questions

come on tim

[Music]

now you're not going to pay any

attention to what she says are you

what would she know supposing she's

right

about the bison becoming x x

or dying she isn't right bison are on

their way back of course

i suppose she is right and away even dad

says the zoo is a survival area for

endangered species big help you are

now why don't you pick on someone your

own size nick what's wrong

there's only one endangered species

around here me

[Music]

enjoying yourself but you really upset

that little boy

is that how you get your kicks they

asked questions

don't blame me if i didn't like the

answers i was only being honest

why don't you try being honest with

yourself

i don't have to put up with this but we

all felt sorry for you

we all understand that you're scared

about your future

but just because you've decided to

wallow up to your ears in self-pity

don't take it out on our kids all right

in about 20 seconds spencer is going to

come in and skin you alive

i know i'd have worked it out quietly

and sensibly

i know i'd certainly have thought twice

before abusing one of spencer's guests

i know ten seconds i've got a few things

to say to mrs spencer myself

he's gonna come charging in here saying

something like mitchell this is

outrageous

mitchell this is outrageous

for me lisa arrived home in tears this

afternoon due to a completely unprovoked

attack by your assistant now just a

second mr spencer

julie it's all an unfortunate

misunderstanding mr spencer my children

were talking to lisa

oh i might have known they were involved

they were trying to be friendly

allowed to run wild as usual then it

will listen this time

my children felt sorry for the girl

don't you feel sorry for her of course

and you'll make sure she's taken care of

we'll make sure she's not exposed to

people like yourself

waited on hand and foot a human

vegetable

useless how dare you don't you realize

lisa sits down there with the bite and

thinking about extinction

instead of patronizing her and treating

her like a lost cause

you and her family should be helping her

face the future positively

to be independent to think about having

that operation

i should ask mitchell for a reference if

i were you young lady

you're going to need it

[Music]

i think you just won the mmw award amw

making matters worse

i can't talk him out of an official

complaint to the board now couldn't you

have shown some tact

i saved my tact for the gorilla now look

i'm sorry ken

i tried we've got to do something about

julie relax

i'm thinking about her great that's all

she needs

[Music]

hello dad told us to stay away from you

i just wanted to apologize about

yesterday it was on a downer i didn't

really mean what i said

looks like julie davis is going to lose

a job oh

i talked to uncle tom mr spencer

you're into dungeons and dragons aren't

you i got into at university

takes brains who's the dungeon master me

what mod are you doing module adventure

the quest of the blue rose hidden in the

sl*ve pits of the undercity

that's the one andrew is my assistant

let me know how it goes

i could use the company you talked to mr

spencer about julie

i'll make sure you get a full report

would you like us to show you the rest

of the zoo

no i'm all right here it's better than

sitting at home

if i walk too much i can't trust my back

what's wrong with it

i was cleaning the kitchen floor and i

slipped

i was in hospital for a year a year wow

did you have to have any needles

quite a few now they want me to have an

operation but get sushi's dad to fix you

he's terrific tim

tim dad's a vet he's not a doctor he's

terrific

what's this on a monster list i haven't

worked out what i'm going to use in the

game tomorrow

i just had a brilliant idea don't ask

you're crazy go on i just don't trust

you andrew look you want to help julie

don't you

i think it's a real shame would have

made this zoo the most famous in the

world

oh we'll have to wait years for another

attraction like that

good afternoon mr spencer mrs spencer

is something else gone wrong around this

place what's this

attraction you're talking about the

three-toed amazonian fruit bat mr

spencer never heard of it

well it's incredibly rare julie was

going to arrange a specimen for this

suit

through that professor of hers at the

university well there's no chance now

she's leaving put the zoo on the map you

say

we'd be number one and whoever found us

a

three-toed amazonian fruit bat

would be famous unbelievably famous

thomas

yes yes well if she can find us a

three-nosed attraction

carry on

brilliant he's going to expect that

creature to arrive

one problem at a time

congratulations spencer withdrew his

complaint to the board you're back on

the payroll

well how come oh nick and susie think

lisa had something to do with it

nick and susie i thought they were never

going to speak to lisa ever

ever again well that is the trouble with

the good fight some spoiled sport always

wants to make peace

good afternoon hello

oh yeah i hear you got mr spencer to

withdraw his complaint

thanks i like my job i talked to him

but he'd already made up his mind i

don't think i had much to do with it

oh well anyway i'm sorry about what i

said the other day

you're right miss davis i don't have the

right to take up my

problems on the zoo julie lisa

julie i've spent a lot of time here the

last week

i think there's something wrong with the

bill bison

mc2 z3 come in mitch what's up julie

got a problem at the bison enclosure i'm

away

when did you notice something was wrong

just now when i arrived

well you're right we've got a sick boy

on our hands

[Music]

well mitch doesn't think it's pneumonia

i've got him isolated peter

i'm moving something toxic i have to

medicate him and

hope for the best

herbivores in particular can't afford to

eat anything outside their diet

the effect is like a massive dose of

indigestion just indigestion

it's a small matter for humans but not

for animals

we might lose the old boy

new band of adventurers have agreed to

dare the quest of the blue rose

hidden in the sl*ve pits of the

undercity

do we get a lunch break susie how come

you're playing

you don't enjoy it nick promised to do

the vacuuming for a week

i reckon we need a magic carpet tim

you're weird

where does andrew fit in he's your guide

you can't get through without him

but before he'll answer any of your

questions you have to guess his name

oh it cannot be heard

it cannot be felt cannot be seen cannot

be smelt

it lies behind stars and under hills

and empty holes and fills it comes first

and follows after

ends life kills laughter

you call that a clue well nobody said

guessing my name was gonna be easy

it's dracula why dracula

i just thought it might be dracula

ignore him

[Music]

where do we go now the river of sleep

follow me

this time you go too far harry you play

this game

instead of doing your job harry no

excuse andrew

this is it you are sacked harry is my

die off

enjoy it while you can

well there's not much more i can do ken

let me know if there's any changes

at least his attitude certainly changed

she really cares

don't we all

[Music]

three witches and three towers

chock-a-block with magic powers

one which has a mirror at the end of the

hall one has a book of magic

one a crystal ball

look at that load of fantasy rubbish

i don't think he does any harm thomas

children should be taught to be sensible

well i'd better tell them to stop

putting you in their games what

apparently you're known as the black

knight

[Music]

face it you're going to fail we haven't

given up

yet the blue rose is in the cave of the

four winds

but you can't get it because tim hasn't

got enough points to beat the dragon

i knew he needed a magic carpet shut up

almighty

fighter any suggestions darkness sorry

kid

you're on your own dragons care about

their gold susie

i suppose i try and steal it what's the

distraction worth

three points tim will still need a five

or a six

i'm glad you changed your mind about

julie davis one must be practical

benefit

we don't want to lose that specimen

specimen

the three-toed amazonian fruit bat mr

bennett

thomas yes yes well we must be off um

good day bellis

[Music]

well that's one for us mitch one for us

he's a survivor

admit it you were lucky you didn't fail

luck had nothing to do with it

wait until next time next time maybe

it's not just a game for kids

what is it tim it's the blue rose we won

it

stewart's a sleeping princess

i guess i needed waking up

i'm going to spend a lot of time around

here once i've got the operation over

with

you're not going to become ex

[Music]

no tim i'm not going to die and i'm not

going to become a

i'm a survivor

[Music]

andrew

mr spencer is under the impression that

there's a new exhibit on the way

a three-toed amazonian fruit batch oh

a three-toed figment of andrew's

imagination well i was trying to help

julia julie

mr spencer wants to see it now mr

bennett

i know uncle thomas i think i know how

to solve the problem

well where is it

inside the cave it won't come out

it's nocturnal well that's no good

have it removed to the nocturnal

enclosure oh no can do

it's um it's carnivorous they even eat

one another

one another how do they breed

sort of love-hate relationship the only

answer is to build a special enclosure

shouldn't cost more than twenty thousand

dollars out of the question

there aren't two or three zoos wanting

to take it off our hands

well get rid of it then twenty thousand

dollars

for a fruit bet

[Music]

how was your day tim huh fixed a dragon

woke a princess

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

so

[Music]