Wyrmwood Road of the Dead (2014)

[bunniefuu]

[g*n CLICKS]

[METAL SCRAPES]

MAN: Ready? Let's do this!

[SHRIEKS]

[g*nsh*t]

[SNARLS]

Come on, you f*ck' zombie!

Yep!

- I'm out!
- Same!

Come on.

Come on!

[MELODRAMATIC MUSIC]

MAN: I got a story to tell.

Yesterday, I went pig hunting

with my brothers,
Mulla and Tony.

I drove the car.

Tony brought his blues guitar.

Mulla brought
his favourite r*fle.

And I brought my mean little
sawed-off p*stol-grip 12-gauge.

[CHUCKLES]

We went bush.

There was a strange feeling
in the air.

Dead silent.

That night, I... we made a fire.

Like I usually do.

We just sat there,
barely talking.

Then Mulla sees it.

Min Mins. sh**ting stars.
Everywhere.

I look up and I see them
lighting up the sky.

And I'm scared.

I get a feeling.

I get a feeling right... here.

That night, it took me ages
to go to sleep.

And when I did,
I dreamed bad things.

I woke up in the morning.
Mulla and Tony were gone.

Then I saw blood trails.

I followed them. I saw Mulla.

He was dead.

I look out into the bush
and I see Tony.

I call out to him.

Tony!

Then he turns.

That's not me brother.

Then he come at me.

And I just run,
yelling at him to stop.

But he just keeps coming!

After a while, I get tired

and I just start walking.

Must have went like that
for hours.

Me walking and him chasing.

Then I turned and aimed the g*n.

Took out his legs.

I blew his knee cap off.

Then he starts crawling at me.

I aim for his head.

I couldn't do it.

I shoulda shot him.

Barry.

You got any stories?

This morning, I shot
my wife and child with a nail g*n.

I don't know how to make that
into a story.

Uh-uh! Get rid of it.

Wash your hands.

[SIGHS]

So I told Kaitlyn
that Teah kissed Jason,

but Jason's not officially
going out with Kaitlyn.

Like, they're just friends.

But he also told Angie that they were
'friends with benefits' type deal.

[LAUGHS] So I don't know
what to believe.

Jason told Max that they were,
like, going steady.

Come on, Meganne.
Hang up the phone.

One second.

So, like, Teah's, like, "Oh, my God,
everyone thinks I'm a sl*t."

- Meganne!
- Hey!

And I'm just like, "No, they don't."
But they so do.

- Watch your language, please.
- Put your phone away.

I'm talking to Lisa.

I don't care
if you're talking to Jesus.

Off the phone
or you'll lose it.

- Do as you're told.
- I gotta go, Lisa.

Mum's having a hissy fit.

OK. Laterz.

- [BURPS]
- Oh, Barry!

You're a full grub, Dad.

Can you not be a barbarian,
just for three minutes?

- I'm sorry, babe.
- [SLURPS]

Meganne, come on. Eat properly.

[BARRY LAUGHS]

[WHISPERS] Night-night.

[SIGHS]

[RAUNCHY BLUES MUSIC PLAYS]

- [LAUGHs]
- Stop it!

You're crazy.

- [SHRIEKS]
- Yes.

- [CAMERA CLICKS]
- Yep. Nice, Charlie.

- [SNARLS]
- Yes. Nice.

Do that one more time
for me, babe.

- [MOANS]
- Charlie? sh*t.

- Hon, what's the matter?
- [COUGHS]

- What... the f*ck is that?
- [CONTINUES COUGHING]

- Charlie? Charlie?
- [MOANS]

- [SCREAMS]
- f*ck!

[CONTINUES SCREAMING]

Charlie. [SCREAMS]

[SNARLS]

[SCREAMS]

[GRUNTS]

[CONTINUES SHRIEKING]

[SNARLS]

[GRUNTS]

[SNARLS]

[GRUNTS]

[PANTS]

[DISTANT SCREAMING]

- [DISTANT SCREAMING]
- [PHONE VIBRATES]

- Yeah?
- Oh, Barry, thank f*ck!

f*ck, are you OK?
Is Annie and Meganne safe?

Brooke?

Listen, I don't know
what the f*ck is going on.

Everyone is turning crazy.

Cherry and Charlie just turned.
Their eyes!

- Their eyes went f*cking white.
- Just slow down.

I had to chop off Cherry's head
with a g*dd*mn shovel.

Whoa, whoa. Calm down.
Where are you?

I'm in the studio
in Bulla Bulla.

Barry, listen, you gotta get
somewhere safe, man.

You gotta get outta the city.
Like, f*ck.

[SCREAMS]

Chock?

MEGANNE: Daddy?

There's someone in the kitchen.

Barry...

No, just...
Barry, just wait here.

Just call the police.

Call the cops.

[DOOR CREAKS]

[SNARLING]

Little help!

[SCREAMS]

Get this thing off me!

Get the axe.
Get the f*cking axe!

Go! Hurry up!
What are you waiting for?

[SCREAMS]

[SCREAMS]

Meganne, get in the bedroom!
Go, go!

[BARRY GROWLS]

- [THUD!]
- [SQUEALING]

- Straight to the car.
- Mm-hm.

[GRUNTS]

Barry, come on!

Go, go, go, go, go, go!

[STARTS ENGINE]

sh*t.

Meganne, get in the back, honey.

- Keep your seatbelt on.
- Good girl, Meganne.

Hold on.

[THUD!]

[CRUNCH!]
- sh*t!

- [ZOMBIE SNARLS]
- sh*t.

- Barry!
- Close your eyes, honey.

[MOANS SOFTLY]

[SCREAMS]

[GASPS]

[AUTOMATIC g*nf*re]

[SCREAMS]

[g*nf*re]

[g*n CLICKS]

[SCREAMS]

MAN: Clear!

[GRUNTS]

[ROARS]

The f*ck are you doing?

Oi! We can ball-gag ya
or you can shut up.

So just relax.
This is for your own good.

[GROANS]

[PANTS]

See this?
This is going to go into your neck.

And if you keep struggling,

you're gonna rip up
your own veins.

OK?

Mm-hm.

- Keep it still.
- [MOANS]

- [WHIMPERS]
- Good, good.

That's a good girl.

Is she good?

She's good.

Let's put her out.

[GRUNTS]

What the f*ck
did you do that for?

Looks like we're gonna
have to put her out

the old-fashioned way, Sarge.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

[GASPS]

Meganne, put your mask on.

Get her mask on.

Meganne, sweetie,
you have to put... Meganne?

Barry, stop... Barry, stop the car.
Stop the car!

Meganne! She's not breathing.

- Meganne! Meganne?
- Come on, sweetie. Come here.

[SNARLS]

[SCREAMS]

Come on.

[STARTS ENGINE]

Barry...

- No, keep that on. Keep it on.
- No. No!

I can feel it.

[SCREAMS] No!

Here, quick.

Come here.

[SNIFFLES] I love you so much.

I love you.

[PANTS]

I'm sorry.

Ahh! No!

[SNARLS]

Darling... stay back.

Stay back!

Stay back!

[PULLS TRIGGER]

[SOBS]

[SNARLS]

[MUTTERS] I'm sorry, baby.

[CLICK!]

[SCREAMS]

[MOANS SOFTLY]

[MOANS SOFTLY]

[MACHINE BEEPS STEADILY]

[SNARLS]

[MOANS]

Ooh!

[UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS]

SONG: ♪ Baby, babe,
let's get together

♪ Honey, hon, me and you

♪ And do the things

♪ Oh,
do the things

♪ That we like to do

♪ Oh, do a little dance... ♪

- [SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY]
- ♪ Make a little love

♪ Get down tonight

♪ Get down
tonight

♪ Do a little dance,
make a little love

♪ Get down tonight

♪ Get down tonight... ♪

No.

MAN: Hey!

Turn around.

Turn around, prick.

- f*ck off!
- Hey, hey. Don't.

f*ck!

You're f*cking normal.

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

sh*t. Come on.

Mate, they are coming.

Hey, hey, hey!
Hey, put the g*n down.

Mate, it's just us. Don't...

Put it down.

f*ck. [GRUNTS]

What are you doing, mate?

[BOTH ROAR]

[SCREAMS]

[ZOMBIES SNARL]

[GRUNTS]

Give me the g*n.

Mate, I don't wanna hurt you.
Just give me the g*n.

No.

Give me the g*n.

Then f*cking sh**t me.

You wanna k*ll yourself?

Alright.

You do it.

[SUNNY POP MUSIC PLAYS]

SONG: ♪ If you're feeling
down and low... ♪

[GLASS SMASHES]

Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Put the bat down, alright?

Put it down.
Look, mate, it's just...

Don't hit me with that.
Mate, just put it f*cking...

Alright. Here we go.

See? I've got one.

Mate, I don't wanna
do this, OK?

Just put it down. See? Look.

I'll put mine...
There. Nothing.

Yeah?

You don't need it. It's just us.
Who you gonna k*ll?

Who? Out here? Eh?

Put it down, mate.

Put it down. Yeah?

I need you to get me
to Bulla Bulla.

Alright. Let's go.

[MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY]

[SNARLS]

There it is. Look, look, look.

f*ck'...zombie. Eh?

It's just... like, these zombies,
you know, like...

Just f*ck'...

Just f*ck' can't
get used to it in my head.

f*ck it. I'll fight it.

Oi! Where the f*ck
are you going?

Oi! Get back in the car!

Oi! Get back
in the f*ck' car.

- Get back. Let's go. Get up!
- Why can't we?

Get in.

Get in the car, idiot!

Get in!

Round 'em or through 'em?

Through 'em.

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

- [GAS HISSES]
- f*ck. Hey, whoa.

Whoa, f*ck. Whoa.

[ENGINE DIES]

Try that.

[ENGINE TURNS
WITHOUT STARTING]

Nope. Nothing.

[BANGS ON METAL]

Try now.

[ENGINE TURNS
WITHOUT STARTING]

Nope.

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

[g*nsh*t]

Hey.

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

What is it?

[g*nsh*t]

f*ck!

- Hey!
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

What, is he not a zombie?

No, he's not a f*cking zombie!

Oh, sh*t! Oh, f*ck me!

Is he alright? Is he OK?

What do you f*ck' think?

Looks pretty f*cking dead to me.

Oh, his head's f*cked.

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

[YELPS] Hey. Try this.

I'm keeping this.

You coming or what, mate?

Lead the way.

[SNARLS]

Booyah!

Why are you awake?

[DEVICE BEEPS RAPIDLY]

Ah! They're playing my song.

Will you excuse me?

[BEEPING STOPS]

[IMPLEMENT BUZZES]

- [ELECTRICITY CRACKLES]
- [MOANS]

Good morning, sir!

Ah!

- [GRUNTS]
- [IMPLEMENT BUZZES]

[DING!]]

[BEEPS]

[MOANS]

[GIGGLES SINISTERLY]

I'm just f*ck' with you.
[LAUGHS]

No, you're just due
for another top-up.

No.

Now, you are one
lucky, lucky, lucky little girl.

[SCREAMS]

'Cause you've stayed up
past your bedtime,

you get to see what
the adults do after dark.

Now, hold still.

Hold... still!

If I get this wrong,
you could go into a seizure and die.

Huh?

Mm-hm. Mm-hm.

That's a good girl.

We only have to do this
five more times.

[SCREAMS]

I want that truck.

Oi! Oi!

Can we come inside?

There's f*ck' zombies
everywhere!

Yeah, OK.

How do we get in?

Alright!

Let 'em get close to ya,
then run around 'em.

OK.

Just make sure
that door comes up.

Run, ya b*stards!

- Nice shootin', Ned.
- Thanks, mate.

[THUD!]

Yeah, there's a lot of good sh*t
in here we can use, eh?

What's that, mate?

That HiLux out the front-
which one of youse owns it?

That HiLux ain't goin' nowhere.

Yeah? Why's that?

You drove from the city, right?

- Right.
- Where's your car?

Broke down.

Engine trouble?

Yeah. Right.

I need to show you boys
something.

Petrol, metho, kero. Alright?

Last time I checked,

they were flammable liquids,
weren't they?

- How old's that stuff?
- Brand-spanking-new, mate.

- We bought it last week.
- So your car just stopped, eh?

Guess that'd explain it.

What the f*ck?!
Who's that?

That's Neville.

Oh!

Oh, that's f*ck' rank!

- He's fartin' out of his mouth!
- It's weird, eh?

Oh, f*ck it.

[WHISPERS] 'Night, Neville.

- Ooh, sh*t!
- What the f*ck' f*ck?

The bloods flammable!

Oi! Wake up, Neville.

Come on.

- We need petrol, right?
- Right.

Wrong. We need fuel.

There's no way that could work.

There's one way to find out.

Let's get him out of there.

Righto, Kel,
give it a crack now.

f*ck!

Come on!

[MOTOR STARTS]

- You beauty!
- Good on ya, Neville!

If we can get that truck inside,
we can definitely hook him up,

drive the f*ck outta here.

That's gonna be
a mission, but, eh?

Yeah, but it's doable.

We need to armour up.

Big-time.

f*ck yeah!

They're going for it!

- Ready?
- Born ready!

Right. Let's do this!

Come on, you f*ck' zombies!

- I'm out!
- Same!

[SCREAMS]

It bit it off! That thing
bit me f*ck' nose off!

Frankie, how does it look, mate?
Is me nose gone?

Is it bit off?
Tell me, Frankie!

Yeah, there's not much
nose left, mate.

[YELLS]

- Kel!
- What is it?

Your f*ck' eyes, mate!

What about me f*ck' eyes, Frankie?
What's up with 'em?

- Move out of the way, Frank.
- Wait!

Wait! What are you
f*ck' doin'?

- He's gonna turn any second.
- He's a mate!

[SNARLS]

Get the f*ck' rope, Frank!

[ENGINE RUNS]

This is bullshit.

What the f*ck is that?

This, my friend,
is a gas-powered harpoon.

I built it for a mate
so he can hunt sharks in Perth.

- Is that thing legal?
- Don't be stupid!

Does it work?

I'd move out of the way
if I were you.

f*ck me! Bullseye!

Once that door goes up,
that's it, we're on our way.

Has everyone got
everything they need?

- Yep.
- Ready as we're gonna be.

Righto.

Wait a minute. Frank?

- Yeah, mate?
- Did you turn the stove off?

Right. Let 'er rip, Benny.

[CRUNCH!]

[PANTS]

Hey!

What the f*ck
do you think you're doing?

f*cking kicked me in the ba*ls!

Get him up on the wall
and get out of my lab, you moron!

You call me a moron again,
I'll f*ck' drop ya.

By which you'll be demonstrating
your superior intellect.

Good comeback.

[CHUCKLES]

These people! Honestly!

- [SNARLS]
- [LAUGHS]

Hmm.

Hmm.

Oi.

Should we stop for petrol?

I need to piss.

I need to piss.

You're gonna have to wait, mate.

Barry, that means
"Pull the truck over so I can urinate."

Can't you hold on?
We're nearly there.

Just be quick.

Mate, take the r*fle.

Frank, I'm just
taking a piss, mate.

- Take the f*ck' r*fle.
- [SCOFFS]

f*ck.

I can't hold a r*fle
and my massive c*ck

at the same time, Frank.

But if you wanna come out
and hold one of 'em,

I'll be flattered, mate.

f*ck off!

[MOANS]

- Come on, Benny. Hurry up.
- Don't pressure me, Barry.

It's gettin' dark out here.

Whoo!

- Hurry up, Benny,
- [SIGHS]

- [SNARLS]
- What the f*ck?!

Ahh!

Get back in the truck,
ya f*ck' idiot!

[SIGHS]

So, what did you learn?

- Never get out of the truck.
- Let's get out of here.

You, uh, gonna put
your c*ck away first?

- No!
- Alright.

[ENGINE TURNS
WITHOUT STARTING]

Oh, you're f*ck' jokin'!

Jesus, Mary and Joseph.

[MOTOR DOESN'T START]

- They're not makin' any gas.
- He's empty, you reckon?

Nah, he's not empty.
Have a look at 'em.

Last night,
was Neville breathing the gas?

No. That only really
started up this morning.

It's getting dark, eh?

Yeah.

They stop
breathing the gas at night.

That's why they're faster.
They're using it themselves.

[ZOMBIES SCREECH]

We're f*cked!

Boys! Get in the f*ck' truck!

Get in the truck, Frank.
Get in the truck.

Get your helmets on.

Oh, f*ck me.

It's gonna be a long night.

What do ya reckon, Frank?

This the worst f*ck' nightmare
of your life or what?

No f*ck' way, mate.

What the f*ck
could be worser than this?

About 15 years ago,

a doctor told me
me son had brain cancer.

He was only seven years old.

Talk about sh1tting yourself.

He died in my arms.

That was way worse than this.

This is f*ck' nothin'.

Sorry to hear
about that, Frank.

Yeah, well,
these things happen, eh?

Baz?

So, what I've been
wondering is...

...how come we're not like them?

How come we never turned?

Wormwood.

- What?
- You never read the Bible?

Nah, man.
I don't read that sh*t.

In Revelations, when the third angel
blows his trumpet,

a star called Wormwood
falls to the earth

bringing a disease
that kills a f*ck of people.

That's pretty much the beginning
of the end, biblically speaking.

When I seen those
meteor showers last night,

and then in the morning,

all these dead b*stards
come running out of the bushes,

I figured we were pretty deep into
that final judgment, you know?

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

And when the end comes,

all the good folks go upstairs

and all the bad folks
go downstairs

and there's a bunch of
poor b*stards left in the middle.

What happens to them?

Well, they undergo
a trial by fire.

They get tested by God.

You reckon
we're being tested right now?

Yeah. I reckon we are.

I f*ck' hate tests.

I'm gonna
try and get some sleep.

If one of them b*stards
gets in here and kills me,

wake us up, will ya?

[ZOMBIES SNARL]

[ZOMBIES SNARL]

Uh! What the f*ck' f*ck's
going on?

- f*ck.
- Is that fire?

- What happened?
- I don't know.

I shot one in the face
and the f*ck lit up.

What'd you do that for?

If that fire reaches the compressor,
we're stuffed.

You think I don't
know that, Frank?

- I'm going up there.
- No, you're f*ck' not!

There's a shitload of
them things out there, mate.

What else am I gonna do?

Look, I'm gonna go out there
and put the fire out.

- f*ck those things!
- Take the helmet.

Put it on!

Let's do this.

f*ck you!

You ugly f*ck!

- sh*t.
- Barry!

What the f*ck's going on?

f*ck!

Barry!

- [g*nsh*t]
- I'm alright.

Lock it!

[SCREAMS]

sh*t!

Ah! f*ck!

[SCREAMS] f*ck!

[FRANK SCREAMS]

Frank! Did it bite ya? Frank!

Did it bite ya, mate?

- The medical box!
- Eh?

The f*ck'...
The f*ck' medical box at your feet!

Oh. You want some bandages.

Open it!

Oh, beers.

You want a beer, Frank?

What do you f*ck' reckon?

[GROANS]

Take a drink.

Take a f*ck' drink!

Gimme some.

I can't do it.

I'm Catholic. I can't do it.

Come on, mate!

It's OK. It's alright.

I've had a good life.

Just make sure you do it
while I'm still me.

I'm really sorry, mate.

f*ck' do it!

Mind if I finish this?

[ZOMBIES SNARL]

[MOANS] Oh, f*ck, man.

f*ck off, meathead!

Oh! Think I'm gonna spew!

Got a pounding hangover.

[GRUNTS]
[MACHINE PURRS]

Oh, nice one!

Give me a hand with Frankie.

[WHISPERS] Come on.

- [ENGINE STARTS]
- Nice one!

Let's get the f*ck
out of here, eh?

Yeah.

Let's do it.

You gonna say something?

What's there to say?

[CROW SQUAWKS]

[SPEAKS ABORIGINAL LANGUAGE]

What was that?

He's safe now.

That crow will come
and take his spirit.

Nice.

Come on. Let's go.

[THUNDER RUMBLES]

[ELECTRICITY CRACKLES]

You boys military?

Yeah.

Do you guys know
what's been going on here?

- You fellas A-negative?
- What?

Course they're f*ck'
A-negative, Thommo.

What's he talking about?

All we know is there is something
in the air that's changing people.

Anyone with an A-negative
blood type is unaffected.

That's obviously you fellas.

People with any other blood type?
Not so lucky.

So, where are you boys headed?

- North.
- We're going to Bulla Bulla.

Bulla Bulla? Why?

To get his sister.

That's a pretty bad idea.
We've just come from Bulla Bulla.

It's not looking good.
There's infected everywhere.

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Easy, fellas.

Alright, look,
we're all friends here, OK?

We got a call from our captain
about 10 minutes ago.

Now, he's in a roving unit
just down the road, OK?

Now, he said he picked up

a couple more
A-negative blood types.

Survivors, just like you two.

What was your sister's name?

Brooke.

Yeah, right. I'm pretty sure
one of 'em was Brooke.

Well, how about I go and radio our
captain and confirm that for you, eh?

Yeah, you do that.

Well, they've definitely
got a Brooke.

Well, I wanna speak to
whoever's on that radio.

Listen! Now, you hear me out.
Just relax.

Hop back in your car
and I will take you to your sister.

Just tell me where she is.

Look, mate, I don't even
have time for this sh*t, alright?

There are about a million things
I have to do right now.

And you boys,
you're pretty low on my priority list.

So hop back in your car
and you follow me - or don't.

Your choice.
Thommo, we're rolling.

Well? What's it gonna be?

We'll follow you.

They seemed like nice blokes!

Or not.

I don't like it.

Don't like what?

Dunno.

But that guy's full of sh*t.

[STARTS ENGINE]

[MOANS]

[SCREAMS]

[g*n CLICKS]

[BEEPS]

Brooke!

It's time.

[JAUNTY MUSIC PLAYS]

Hmm.

Hmm.

[SCREAMS]

[SCREAMS]

[SHRIEKS]

[SCREAMS]

YOU!

[SAW BUZZES]

[SOMETHING CREAKS]

[GRUNTS]

What the f*ck?

Those lying f*ck.
That's Brooke!

- Brooke!
- Barry?

sh*t.

Quick, jump!

Jump!

- Quickly!
- [GRUNTS]

- sh*t!
- They're shootin' at us!

Go, go, go!

Hold on!

[BOTH SCREAM]

Whoo-hoo!

- f*ck!
- What's that sound?

- Come on!
- What's the problem?

I don't know.

- [COUGHS]
- You OK?

What happened back there?

Oh, f*ck me dead! Barry!
They blew this joker's head off!

sh*t.

We need to find a zombie fast.

Zombie? What do we
need a zombie for?

This truck runs on zombies.
No zombies, no truck.

Come on, you dead b*stards!
Come and get it!

Where are ya?

You want a zombie?

Yeah.

- I'll get you a zombie.
- BARRY: f*ck!

Brooke, what the f*ck's wrong
with your eyes?

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

[SCREECHES]

Don't sh**t him!

- [THUD!]
- sh*t!

Alright, what the f*ck
just happened then?

Where do you want him?

Back of the truck.

She can control
f*ck' zombies!

What?

- Come on!
- [YELLS]

What the f*ck
are we waiting for?

We need the f*cking mask
over that thing's mouth!

- What mask?
- The blue f*cking mask!

OK, go!

[SPEAKS ABORIGINAL LANGUAGE]
Mulla! Mulla!

The joke's on me now, bro.
[LAUGHS]

You OK?

Nah, I'm f*cked. [GROANS]

Ahh! What the f*ck
are you doin'?

I'm putting pressure on the wound.
It'll stop the bleeding.

Just f*ck' warn me
next time, eh?

Sorry.

You're better-looking
than your brother.

So are you.

I'm Brooke.

I know. I'm Benny.

Thanks for helping me out
back there, Benny.

No problem, darlin'.

Nice to finally meet ya.

I wish I could say
I heard a lot about ya,

but your brother there
is a bit of a tight-lipped b*stard.

[COUGHS]

Yeah.

I guess it runs in the family.

Hey, Barry?

Where's Annie and Meganne?

They're dead.

My brother Mulla,
he's up there in the trees,

laughing at me, the b*stard!

Barry, we're gonna have to pull over.
Benny's not good.

f*ck.

Alright.
I'm gonna pull off-road.

[BENNY GROANS AND GASPS]

There you go, mate.

It's a nice day for it.

Oi. I want you
to leave me here, bro.

- Don't be stupid.
- Listen to me!

Just give me a g*n
and plenty of b*ll*ts.

- I can take care of meself!
- I know you can, mate.

But there's no bloody way
I'm leaving you here.

Now, let's take a look
at this thing, eh?

sh*t.

You two gotta keep moving.
You know that!

f*ck that bullshit.

Now, we're gonna patch you up
and we're all leaving here together.

Nah! I'm not getting
back in that truck!

- Yeah, you are!
- [GRUNTS]

- Brooke?
- [GROANS]

Brookie?! sh*t.

Brooke!

You alright?

Oh, God. f*ck me, no.

Somethings happening to me.

[GASPS]

Come here.

I k*lled them both.

Could you do it for me?

I don't know if I can.

Give me the g*n.

You hold my hand?

[GASPS]

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

Give me the g*n. Run! Go!

Come on, f*ck!

MAN: Wakey-wakey.

Call to your sister.

Go f*ck yourself.

Thompson?

- [TWO g*nshots]
- [GROANS]

Rubber b*ll*ts.

They pack quite a punch,
though, don't they?

You wanna know
what the real one feels like, mate?

The real one
feels like sh*t, Barry.

Call to your sister.

No, she'll be right.

Go and get the pliers.

Call to your sister.

f*ck you!

[MOANS]

[ZOMBIES SCREECH]

[SCREAMS]

f*ck me!

Ever seen 'em move that fast
in the daytime before, boss?

- McGlaughlin?
- Yes, boss.

- Take another nail out.
- Stop!

[GROANS] sh*t.

Put 'em on.

Oh, f*ck this sh*t. Come on!

[YELPS]

Leave her alone,
ya f*ck' b*stards!

Shut up, dickhead!

Easy, easy.

Sorry about him.

[MAN WHISTLES] Listen up!

They want us to take the girl's head off
and chuck it in the icebox for later.

f*ck yeah!

Actually, boss,
I've got just the thing for this.

- It's over in the truck.
- Go and get it now.

[WHISPERS] Hey, Benny.

You got those matches
on you, mate?

- Yeah.
- Give me 'em, hey?

Why?

- I'm gonna take us all out.
- Hey?

See that compressor up there?

I'm gonna blow it up.

Be like a f*ck'
atom b*mb went off.

Can we talk about
a possible alternative?

Got no time, mate.

We're dead anyway.
You know that.

- I got a better idea.
- f*ck's sake. What?

I let him up there bite me.

What the f*ck
are you talking about?

I've got a number-7
k*ller boomerang

hidden under the truck,
sharp as f*ck.

- A boomerang?
- Yeah.

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

Your sister,
she can control zombies.

Yeah, so?

So, I'll be... a zombie.

No.

That bloke she k*lled
over there.

His g*n.

- What?
- [GROANS]

Benny, give me
the f*cking matches. Now.

You want a head taken off?

You use a f*ck' sword.

Where the f*ck
did you get that?

Who cares? Let's get this done.

f*ck yeah, boss.

Leave her alone,
you f*ck' b*stards!

Don't touch her!

Benny, they're about to
chop my sister's f*ck' head off.

Give me the f*cking matches!

- What about my idea?
- What about your idea?

You're rambling.
You're not making any f*ck' sense.

- I'm rambling, am I?
- Give me the f*cking matches.

McGlaughlin, you help me hold her.
Thompson, you're cutting.

- With pleasure, boss.
- You want the matches?

f*ck's sake! Now!

Here's the matches.

f*ck' w*nk*r!

Come on!

[BOTH GROAN]

k*ll me, you b*stard!

You're going down, ball-buster.

- [SCREECHES]
- [ROARS]

One.

Two.

Three.

Drop the g*n or they attack.

[GRUNTS]

Nooo!

Nooo! Nooo!

[SCREAMS]

You f*ck!

[GASPS]

Oh, f*ck!

I'm guessing you're not
an A-negative blood type, mate.

You're done, son.

Just a matter of time.

[SIGHS]

Well played.

There's more at stake here
than you know, mate.

It's not about you
or your sister.

Or your mates.

It's about the survival
of the human f*ck' race, mate.

- Do you understand?
- You're a piece of sh*t.

[GRUNTS]

You wanna fight me, mate?

I wanna rip
your f*cking head off.

f*ck it. You and me
go round and round.

Come on, then.
Take a f*ck' swing.

[GRUNTS]

Come on.

Come on, mate. Don't you
f*ck' p*ssy out on me now.

Stand up.

Good boy.

[GROANS]

Now, I could snap
your f*ck' neck in half right now.

Oh, you f*ck'...

Oh, f*cking...

Never... Never, EVER,
grab a man's ba*ls in a fistfight.

It shows low character.

What about using a g*n?

You're a f*ck' dog.

Dog, am I?

You're the f*ck' dog, mate!

- [GROANS]
- Jesus Christ!

f*ck' this sh*t is over,
mate, alright?

I'm tellin' ya, some blokes...
just don't know...

...when... to quit.

Well, there ya go.
You're right back where you started.

Didn't exactly rip
me f*ck' head off, did ya, mate?

[SNARLS]

Hey?

sh*t.

They are f*ck' disgusting.

[GRUNTS]

Where are ya goin', mate?
You were doing so f*ck' well.

And what are you
gonna do with those?

[SCREAMS]

Oi!

[ZOMBIE SCREECHES]

[MELODRAMATIC MUSIC]

What the f*ck?

Get down on the f*ck' ground
and put your hands on your head.

So, what's in the truck?

Get down on
the f*ck' ground now!

Wrong answer.

m*therf*ckers!

[HEAVY METAL MUSIC]

[FUNKY MUSIC]