Blind Vacation (2025)

[bunniefuu]

Hey, Mom. Is it something urgent?

I'm out for a run.

Mom, I already asked. Is it urgent?

Here you go again,

talking about kids and marriage

How many times have we gone over this?

I'm just not into it.

No, I'm not sure when I'll visit.

Work keeps me busy. I'll call you back.

Whose kid is this?

You had them, now take responsibility!

This is a running lane for adults!

So annoying.

Call the driver for 8:00 a.m.,

book the conference room for 10:00 a.m.,

and get the documents ready for 10:35 a.m.

What? 7:58.

Oh, it's 7:59, but it's not because

I'm late. It's because you were early

- Good morning.

- Morning. I shouldn't be waiting for you.

Being punctual is a core part

of our company culture.

Words of wisdom.

b*tch.

She's here, she's here.

Clean up, please.

Folks!

It's starting.

She is here.

Get to work, guys!

- Good morning.

- Anna Vitaliivna

Being neat is part of our corporate ethics

and your dress code.

- Apologies

- Greetings, team!

And, Katya, how many times do

we have to go over this?

Your personal dress code,

black on the bottom, white on top.

This blouse is white.

And my name is Snizhana.

This is ivory, Katya.

Hey, there, Matush! How's it going?

None of the locations

you suggested work for us.

Mr. Matush want to emphasize once again

that their goal is to create

a large-scale project,

one that is socially significant

and beneficial for both countries.

Shame.

Why immediately "shame"? Why so blunt?

Anna, "shame" in Slovak

means "attention," "caution."

That's Mr. Matus speaking to me.

Listen, we've offered you

the best locations that exist.

Rest assured, our company boasts

the largest selection of the most

prestigious properties in Ukraine.

We're wasting our time.

The phrase wasn't meant to be translated.

Mr. Matush asks to prepare new proposals,

taking the latest inputs into account.

We're expecting new proposals

by the end of the week.

Of course.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Anna,

our Slovak partners are not satisfied!

Inna Ivanivna, we presented them

our best locations.

As I was taught at Oxford:

"There are no impossible tasks,

only poor performers."

I understand. We're trying, but

Anna Vitaliivna!

This deal is crucial for our company.

Attracting foreign investment

into our economy

is vital for all of us!

I sent our Slovak friends to you because

your branch has the best performance!

And I'm really counting on you, Anna.

Give it your all, personally,

the way you know best.

Time is money. Bye.

Your cappuccino.

Cold, no foam.

I didn't allow you to leave, Katya.

I want to remind you you're not

working as a barista here.

You have other responsibilities.

- Do I need to remind you?

- I'm not Katya.

Here. These are all the locations

we've prepared for the Slovaks.

The red ones are the ones

they saw but didn't like.

Yellow ones, they're undecided

but not ruling them out.

How many are there?

I haven't been counting, but I hope you

count better than you make cappuccinos.

We need to discard all the reds

and update the data for all the others.

- I'm expecting the report by 5:00 p.m.

- For today?

No, not on Kupala Night

Yes, Katya, for today.

We operate on a same-day basis.

You are free to go.

I'm not Katya.

Well, it's a nice little bouquet,

what do you think?

I love surprising my lady.

So, how often do you surprise

your loved ones?

Leave a comment.

I'd love to hear your thoughts.

And don't forget to hit the "like" button.

Why do guys like him

end up with women like that?

Knock, knock.

Is this the office of my sweet anaconda?

Oh, Bodya, it's you. Make it quick.

I have loads of work.

Work isn't going anywhere.

No need to rush off.

Work isn't going anywhere,

but those Slovak folks might

just jump ship to another company

or country.

So, what did you need?

Yeah, I wanted to celebrate

my darling panda on our anniversary.

Who?

Your quirky kitty wanted to remind you

that exactly 101 days ago,

my life changed forever.

Exactly 101 days ago, you stepped

into my world, and since then,

I've been over the moon,

eternally grateful that fate

brought us together

at that yoga camp 101 days ago.

Hold on. That's not all.

The main gift:

A two-person yoga-spa retreat

in the Carpathians.

Ultra VIP luxury hotel.

We'll get it on three times a day.

Smoothies, Jacuzzis Everything we love.

We're heading out right now.

Have you ever received gifts like this?

Leave a like, drop a comment.

Are you seriously going live right now?

Look, surprises are great and all.

But do we really have to share every

detail of our lives with your followers?

My little panda, don't stress.

Don't get mad.

I miss you so much.

And I'd love to spend

the weekend alone with you.

You've been on edge lately.

And I

Just can't connect with your Zen.

Your sacred chakra is blocked.

You need to get out of these walls,

change the energy

You need to feel me.

You need to feel the Carpathians,

nature, the cosmos.

You know, I was just thinking,

this is exactly what I need right now.

And theoretically,

I could work from there.

So yeah.

What?

Here's what we'll do.

You head there today,

and I'll wrap up my stuff

and come to you tomorrow.

Awesome.

If you liked the surprise,

give it a thumbs up.

I turned your phone off.

Babe, you know,

this is some amazing content.

It's perfect for gaining new followers.

You know what? Let's forget about it

and go chase down those old colleagues.

Wait.

I'm hungry.

How about we grab lunch?

If we do it fast.

Katya, book me a train ticket.

- Where to?

- The Carpathians.

A one-way ticket.

No need to book the hotel.

And I'll also need a transfer

from the station to the hotel.

The address is in the certification.

Just note in the comments that

the car should be business class,

the driver must not speak to me,

and no music from the occupiers, got it?

Katya, what are you drinking?

At work?

I'm Snizhana.

And today, I'm heading

to a bachelorette party for a friend.

Submit the report for the Slovaks

and go wherever you want.

Anna Vitaliivna,

can I finish everything by tomorrow?

We've been planning

this bachelorette party for month.

A best friend doesn't get married

every day.

The Slovaks aren't coming every day,

and they won't wait around

for you to have your fun

and for your friends to get married.

Come on, Anna Vitaliivna, please.

Seriously, don't be a wicked stepmother.

Let Cinderella have some fun.

Bohdan, this isn't a kindergarten.

Do you need this job?

Yes, you do. If you walk out

of this office without that report,

don't bother coming back.

Do you hear me?

Flowers in my office, put them in a vase.

Red means love

But blue

The red ones don't work.

Or is it the blue ones?

Or am I the one turning blue?

I'm getting confused

about Slovaks' decisions.

Are you planning to come over?

Do you know what's going on?

Are you coming to us?

I have a lot of work.

Or we come to you.

You wanted to go on a vacation

to the Carpathians with Bohdan?

Now, Katya and I will arrange

such a retreat for you.

You'll end up remembering the names

of all your former secretaries.

The Pearl of Transcarpathia.

Far from the city noise and chaos,

right in the heart

of the mighty Carpathian Mountains.

Not cheap.

But I'll cover it.

Consider it a farewell gift.

Because dignity is worth more than money.

Far from people, so you won't

ruin anyone else's life again.

"It's hard to get to us.

We recommend using our transport."

That's the jackpot!

Here's your business-class transfer.

Tell the driver to meet me

with a sign that says:

"b*tch."

Yes, Bohdan. Yes, I just arrived.

I'll be at the hotel soon.

No, no champagne,

and I don't need the Jacuzzi either.

I'll take a shower. I still have

loads of work to do. Okay, bye.

Where's my transfer?

Where's Anna?

Oh, hello.

We're going the wrong way.

Welcome to the gem

of the Transcarpathian resorts.

A couple of hours,

and you'll be in paradise on earth.

And instead of apples and incense,

you'll smell sheep cheese and spruce.

- Sit down.

- What are you doing?

Are you really planning

to take me in this monstrosity?

Yeah, I'm enjoying it too.

Powerful beast. I named it Oleksa Dovbush.

After my great-great-great

I booked business class.

What do you think

we're doing here with Oleksa?

We're running a business.

I'm not about to waste time

flying back and forth for nothing.

- Any other options?

- Yo, ma'am, we're in Transcarpathia.

We've got options

like at a buffet in Turkey.

You can count on Grandpa Antin.

He's our local courier.

Are you joking? That's hilarious.

I'll go with you.

I could tell right away

that you have a soft spot for Oleksa.

Please, have a seat.

Madam, can I help you?

Yes, if you could.

That's harassment!

That's for calling Oleksa a monstrosity,

and this is at least body-shaming.

So it's 1:1. Let's keep playing.

- All right, take care. Stay well, Grandpa.

- Goodbye, goodbye.

By the way, leave your phone,

check in with nature,

and give the Banosh a like.

- Yes, Inna Ivanivna.

- Are you Ivanivna?

No, I'm not at the office,

I'll be in on Monday.

I remember, regarding the location

for the Slovaks.

Yes, that's exactly what I'm working on.

What was it I wanted to tell you?

I'm starting to get used

to your left hand.

Check the property ownership

for lot number 14.

What are you saying?

I'm saying, you're not hauling potatoes.

Could you be more careful?

- The right word is krumpli.

- What?

That's what you call potatoes.

These are my mountains. I'm the lord here.

And if someone dares step into my house

and tell me what to do

They rented that location

from over there, yeah.

Who drove them? Right. Not me.

Oleksa needed the repair.

Damn it, he let us down.

Buckle up. We're taking off.

Welcome to Transcarpathia!

Where have you been, my little rose?

I can't seem to calm down.

Here we go.

All right, guys, let's get started.

Panda, phone.

Turn on the live stream.

Let me know when it's live.

Yo, folks! The time has come!

I'm so nervous.

Drop a like, leave a comment.

It really matters to me.

We've arrived!

Please make sure

you've got all your stuff.

Thanks for choosing our airline.

- Where's the front desk?

- Over there.

It's all-inclusive area.

Make yourself at home,

but remember you're a guest.

Throw on a jacket. The sky's darkening,

and you're shaking like a leaf.

Rain's coming, mark my words!

Oh, my poor fate. Oh, fate

Come back! This isn't the hotel.

Dovbush, a mountain-bred rebel.

So

Yeah.

Hello. Who's this?

Katya, what the hell is going on?

My name is Snizhana.

Frankly, that doesn't matter right now.

Where did you send me?

To where you belong.

Water God, I really need some water.

Katya, listen,

you've sent me to the wrong hotel.

And that is completely unprofessional.

If you don't fix this immediately,

I'll fire you.

I won't tolerate this kind of behavior

in my company.

I can't stand working with that arrogant,

self-absorbed,

two-faced snake who sees nothing

but her inflated, pompous,

egotistical self.

Take three days out in nature,

away from people.

At least let this weekend pass

without ruining anyone's life.

Maybe then Bohdan can finally get

some peace from this vixen.

What did he even see in you?

Excuse me?

It's too late to apologize now.

Apologies aren't accepted.

I'm quitting.

I've sent the apartment booking

info to your work email.

Have a lovely weekend!

Room service.

Champagne, chocolates,

and something for heartburn.

Everything they asked for

at the front desk.

Damn it.

Well, it's not that terrible.

That was quite the ride.

Oh, my God!

Who are you? What are you doing here?

I was sleeping here until you decided

to crash on top of me.

I can see you're asleep,

but what exactly are you doing here?

I live here.

Well, we live here, actually

Is this some kind of joke?

Do I look like a stand-up comic to you?

This is mine.

Listen

Want some coffee?

Sure. Cappuccino.

My secretary thinks I'm an idiot

Doesn't really matter what she thinks.

What matters is that this place is booked

in my name, and I'm staying here.

Not at all. This is my home.

Your subscriber is out of range.

So, are we continuing?

I charge by the hour.

A large cappuccino, extra hot,

in a big mug.

Dense, velvety foam, no more than two

centimeters. And with plant-based milk.

- Sorry, what was your name again?

- Anna Vitaliivna.

Head of Sales at the most prestigious

real estate agency in Kyiv.

And I'll be living here.

Well, this just keeps getting

more interesting.

Not hot enough.

Go on. Don't stop.

I'm not staying here forever.

Just for the weekend.

My secretary messed up and booked

a transfer from the station,

not to the hotel

where I'm actually expected,

but somehow to this house

she rented instead.

Do you understand?

Yes.

Quite an interesting story.

But you've got something mixed up.

Let's go, let's go.

This is where I live.

And you should leave

My house.

But it's pouring outside.

You're not made of sugar. You won't melt.

What are you doing?

It's the middle of the night!

Yeah.

Wow, this rain is really coming down!

You must be Anna?

Yes, that's right. Anna. Anna Vitaliivna.

- Finally, a sensible person!

- Aunt Mariyka, who's this?

Why didn't you say you were coming?

Oh, my God! Oh, my dear Nazar!

It's you! I Oh, dear!

You look so worn out, my boy.

Don't they feed you at the front?

Yes, they feed us. I finally got

some time off after two solid years.

I wanted to spend it at home.

Quietly. Alone.

Well, now it's for two.

You didn't tell me you were coming.

And here I am

I'm renting your place out online.

Well, you know, to make a few bucks.

God, do you know what prices are like now?

Seriously, this money is impossible

to live on. You never call, never text.

I've been a little busy. What do you mean,

you're renting out my house?

You wanted me to keep

an eye on the place, so I did.

- Aunt Mariyka, that's not what I meant!

- Okay, hold on, hold on, hold on!

Sorry to break up this deep

and meaningful chat, but guess what?

I wasn't exactly planning

on being here either.

So, here's how we're gonna do this:

I'm staying here for the night,

and tomorrow

I'm heading back to civilization.

You two can hash out your issues.

I'm staying out of it.

Hold on a second.

- What do you mean, "wait"?

- The rain will stop, and all will be fine!

I'll let you stay here

Until morning.

- But there's one condition.

- What condition?

You'll drink this cappuccino.

I really put in the effort.

And you didn't even say thanks.

Thank you for what? For this life elixir?

And, please, do not desecrate

the noble word "cappuccino."

Or, if you prefer

Welcome to the Pearl of Transcarpathia!

Finally, I found the spot!

I found the perfect location.

Checks all the boxes

from the revised brief.

Great! Fantastic!

Excellent! Let's get that partnership

agreement signed right away.

That's it. I'm done.

Good morning.

Morning. You heading out?

Yeah.

Let me tempt you

with our house cappuccino.

- It's on us, of course.

- No, thanks.

I'm still dealing with

the aftertaste of yesterday.

Nazar, good to see you!

Petro Vasyliovych, come on in!

Where's your admin?

- The one from yesterday?

- Don't know.

Here, fresh ones.

Poppy seed and cherry,

just the way you like them.

- Hey, Vasyliovych. You shouldn't have.

- God bless you. Here you go.

That smell!

And the taste!

- Just like my mom used to make.

- Enjoy!

So, how's things at the village council?

Oh, you know, same old.

How about you? Staying long?

- Don't know. What about me?

- Who's this? Care to introduce us?

That mutt? Just some hanger-on.

- Stuck around.

- Excuse me?

You still here?

She's a tourist from Kyiv.

Heading home soon.

I'm trying to raise money for a drone.

Would you want to chip in?

Any donation helps.

You know, I'd love to.

But my phone took a mud bath

in your village yesterday.

It's still recovering

from this spa treatment.

- I was looking for you!

- God bless you, Mariyka.

- And I was looking for you too, Annusya.

- I'm not Annusya. I'm Anna.

Like Anna of Kyiv,

Yaroslav the Wise's daughter.

Nazar, you there?

Anyway, I wanted to ask,

you're not leaving today, are you?

- Me?

- Why would you leave?

Look at how beautiful it is here.

You should rest,

considering how far we've driven.

Look what I've got: Breakfast!

By the way, your room includes breakfast.

- For me?

- And look at these flowers!

Good heavens, we'll decorate the whole

place for Kupala's Night with these.

There's just one little issue

I can't give you a refund.

I bought new hens because

my chickens won't lay eggs.

It's a real problem for the village

when the chickens don't lay.

I don't want your money.

I need to leave early. Call me a driver.

What driver?

Who's going to drive me

back to civilization?

Your business colleague,

who brought me here yesterday.

I don't know his name

I don't really remember

the names of the staff.

- Oh, right! Oleg!

- Yeah, sure, Oleg.

You go that way, down the hill,

you'll see some pine trees.

There's a green house there.

You can't miss it.

- What hill? You don't understand.

- Well, you know

Mariyka, can I borrow you for a sec?

Excuse me.

Mary, you look amazing today.

Like Beyonc at her last concert.

- Petro Vasyliovych.

- Well, I'm telling you, that's how it is.

Farewell.

You already said goodbye.

Hey! Anyone here?

Taxi!

I'm a terrible person.

I lost my temper.

I did a terrible thing to someone.

It sounds like your inner child took over.

Let's explore that.

Tell me about your childhood.

What was your relationship

with your parents like?

What does my childhood

have to do with this?

All our adult problems,

our hang-ups, our fears

They often stem from our childhood.

Those hidden or

Not-so-hidden resentments we carry

Thank you.

Sorry, that was unprofessional.

Let's continue.

Maybe you're in

the wrong profession altogether.

What did you want to be

when you were a child?

- I dreamed of being a singer.

- A singer. How interesting.

The microphone as a phallic symbol.

Interesting, very interesting.

You know that saying, "An artist

is someone who's lost all shame"?

- Hello, Bohdan.

- Don't call the police.

I know what happened.

Hey! Excuse me!

Listen, you remember me?

You gave me a ride yesterday.

How could I forget you?

Of course I remember.

Good. You dropped me off

at the wrong hotel yesterday,

so take me to the train station, now.

No.

What do you mean, no?

I'll pay. How much?

Nothing.

Oh, I see.

Will this be enough?

Excuse me. Weren't you told?

What were they supposed to tell me?

This is the Carpathians, sweetheart.

There was a downpour yesterday.

The roads are washed out.

We called the people in charge, of course.

They'll fix it in three or four days.

Until then, no one's going anywhere,

neither to us nor from us.

What do you mean no one's going anywhere?

I can't stay here for three or four days.

It's impossible. Take me to

the train station right now, I told you!

You city folk are so funny.

Give me your phone. I'll call someone,

and they'll get me out of here.

By Poseidon's beard. Take the phone

from the glove compartment.

- Here?

- Yes.

And close your own.

Damn, I don't remember any numbers

except my bank account.

Give me the number for a local taxi.

Sure thing. That would be 093

1, 1, 8, 9,

That's my taxi, and I'm your driver.

And anyone who calls

and bothers me while I'm working,

they'll be walking,

and it'll be double the fare.

A comedian, huh? Another stand-up guy.

I met another one like you.

He lives up on the hill, named Nazar.

Maybe you two should team up,

do a tour of Transcarpathia.

I even have a name for you:

"The Pearls of Transcarpathia."

There's no need for that attitude.

Please, take this.

You can put in your own SIM card

and make calls wherever you like.

It's true, it's an oldie,

the twelfth one, but

- Wait, I can really take it?

- Go ahead. It's yours.

Thanks. We can transition

to a first name basis.

You women are all the same.

Hand you an iPhone, and that's it.

Eyes light up,

suddenly we're on a first-name basis.

Calm down. As soon as I figure out how

to get out of here,

I'll give it right back.

Sure, sure.

Heard the same thing

with the iPhone 10. And the 11.

Oh, my fate Stuck with an Android now.

Darling! Hey, sweetheart. Finally!

Borya, we have a situation.

Long story short, this Katya,

or whatever her name is, Snizhana

She booked the transfer

from the station to the wrong hotel.

Not the one you gifted me,

but in a random place

in the middle of nowhere,

deep in the Carpathians. See?

I was really worried

when you didn't show up.

I swear, my little anaconda,

I was losing hair from the stress.

But then I pulled myself together

and called Snizhana.

She said it was a mistake.

Completely accidental.

She sent you to the wrong village.

And then a storm hit,

washed out the roads.

I dropped my phone in the flood,

so I'm calling from someone else's.

Looks like I'm stuck here

for three or four days.

All right, sweetheart,

I'm coming to your rescue.

I'm canceling my massage right now

and heading straight to the village

where you are.

- What's it called?

- What's the name of the village?

Someone, tell me,

what's this village called?

Are you filming a TikTok too?

This whole trip of mine is a TikTok.

Now, what's the name of this place?

Ah, it's Meshkety.

The village is called Meshkety.

So, what now?

I hear you. You're calling me on video.

I'm canceling my swim session

right now just for you.

Packing my bags and heading to Meshkety.

Let me check Google Maps. I love you.

I'll save you.

Love you, love you, love you.

Meshkety doesn't exist on Google Maps.

Why?

Why does everything bad happen to me?

Come on, pick up

Give me a phone.

- Go ahead.

- I finally got through to you!

I found the perfect location

for our partners.

Less talk, more action. Show me.

What a beauty!

The landscape is incredible.

Perfect for the largest

spa center in Eastern Europe.

Over there,

an ideal spot for the hot tubs,

and to the left,

a great place for the sauna.

And don't forget to get the local

residents' consent for construction.

I'll prepare all the photos and videos

and send them right away.

You can do it whenever you want.

End of the conversation.

Good afternoon.

Can you help me with a taxi?

Over there, right? Thank you, thank you.

Whoa, that's a taxi!

Good afternoon.

Hello, sir. Do you know how

to get to the Meshkety place?

Yes

Grandpa, do you know

how to get to Meshkety?

I do.

Great. Let's go.

- But I'm not going.

- What do you mean, "not going"?

- The road's been washed out.

- How much money are we talking?

Happiness isn't measured in money, my boy.

Seems like fate decided to throw

another challenge my way.

All right, I accept.

Yeah, and we've been through worse before.

My dear, your knight is rushing to you.

You again?

And I'm just as happy to see you.

If you've forgotten something,

I can fetch it for you.

Listen.

The roads to town are flooded,

and there's nowhere else to stay.

Trust me, I know these things.

So, until they're fixed,

I'll be staying here.

Three, maybe four days.

Whether you like it or not.

Hold on. That's not what we agreed.

Let's get one thing straight.

I didn't agree to any terms with you.

I paid for this place.

If you try to kick me out,

I'll make such a scene your aunt

What's her name? Mariyka?

Well, she won't just be ashamed

to live in this village,

she won't be able to walk down the street.

I'm glad we came to an understanding.

What else?

Only three nights.

But you're in my house,

and you'll live by my rules.

What rules?

First, no smoking in my house.

What?

Excuse me. I didn't catch that.

And please have my suitcase

taken to my room.

Nazar!

Hello?

They said in the village you were home.

I brought you a bilberry cheesecake.

Nazar's not here.

And to save you the next question, no,

I don't know where he is

or when he'll be back.

You can leave the cheesecake over there,

with the rest of the food

your fellow villagers keep bringing.

Who are you?

Oh, just me?

Anna Vitaliivna. I live here.

If you have no further questions,

please close the door behind you.

Mr. Petro, this is a ticket

to a prosperous future for Meshkety.

If the residents agree to the development

of the tourist infrastructure,

foreign investment will flood in,

and that means a huge boost

for the village.

Isn't that what you want?

Well, of course! Money for the village

is always a good thing.

- I agree.

- Good.

- And what's this?

- Here, smell it.

What's with the "ugh"?

This stuff's full of minerals,

good bacteria,

and all sorts of other beneficial crud.

- What's it good for? Keeping flies away?

- You'd be surprised.

People came all the way from France

for this mud.

To make their fancy creams.

Hold on, I'll show you.

Look, see?

You're right. The French were really here.

Yeah, you think I got

this French charm from nowhere?

Picked it up from Parisian visitors.

What does that mean?

I don't know, but it sounds good, right?

You think Mariyka will like it?

You're going to love it here.

This is the perfect place

for a spa retreat.

Hold on with those lists!

I haven't shown you everything yet.

We've got a bee farm, a winery,

an old cheese factory

You name it, we've got it.

Now, let's put on some shoes and go!

Finally got that thing working?

I was about to sell it.

It's been gathering dust for so long.

Nazar, it's good to see you.

Let me help.

Why didn't you say you needed a hand?

I didn't want to bother you,

especially with a guest.

You need to take care of her.

Here, have some berries.

Just picked them. They're fresh.

How's Annusya doing?

She's doing fine.

Thank God.

Listen, Nazar, maybe you should

think about settling down.

She's a lovely girl.

Smart, refined.

Maybe she's "the one."

All your classmates have kids already.

No matchmaking.

It's not the right time.

Love's always in season.

Nazar!

- Welcome back.

- Hi.

- Hello, Aunt Mariyka.

- Hello.

I dropped by your place,

brought you a cheesecake.

You shouldn't have. But thank you.

You got some girl in your place?

Is she with you?

From the w*r?

She's Aunt Mariyka's tenant.

Well, is that all?

Oh, yes, thank you.

Without men's hands, I'd have been

fiddling with this till night.

My dear.

Zlatochka, this is for the jam.

These cool little videos become viral.

Yeah, yeah, I got it.

Hey, kid, check how many views

my Matilda's got.

Wow, you're a real viral hit.

sh**t more Matilda!

- Grandma Kylyna, glory to Jesus!

- Glory forever, Petro!

- That's Annusya.

- I'm Anna. Anna from Kyiv.

Yes, yes, our guest from Kyiv.

She's here on a village tour.

- Good day.

- Good day to you.

She's here to help us develop

our ecotourism.

You should show her that embroidery

of yours, the one you sell online.

You've never seen anything like it!

Grandma Kylyna here is

a local celebrity. Isn't that right?

Listen, if you're such a celebrity,

could I get your autograph?

What's this?

It's an agreement for infrastructure

development in Meshkety.

- I see.

- I want the world to see your embroidery.

Will you show me more of your work?

Yes, at the Kupala Night festival.

Come, and you'll see it all.

Everyone will be wearing my shirts.

You'll see.

- Yes, yes, everyone.

- I have to go. I need to milk the cow.

Okay, fine.

Annusya, come help your grandma for a bit.

Let's make a deal.

I'll approach calmly,

and you'll give me what I need.

Deal.

I've got this under control.

We have a deal now.

Everything will be fine.

What is that?

- It's a technical marvel.

- What does it do?

Since Matilda came along,

and with three cows,

I don't milk by hand anymore.

I'm lost.

You're telling me I need to give a cow

an LPJ massage before she'll give milk?

Honey, maybe a donation would be better?

With pleasure.

Hey! You!

- What?

- I'm trying to sleep here.

I'm working. Please don't disturb me.

If you're not sleeping, let others sleep.

If you can't,

then you don't want it badly enough.

Listen, sir,

couldn't you find any other time of day

to mow this darn

This beautiful lawn?

Excuse me.

I didn't realize I needed permission

to do things at my own home.

And what time is it?

And by the way

Don't touch my things.

Thank you.

Now I'll show you our famous horse,

the one the French gave massages to.

Look at this stallion!

- Good day.

- God bless you!

This is our indispensable

stable hand, Zlatka.

We've already met.

Didn't sleep well, neighbor?

Nazar wouldn't let me sleep all morning.

It's a young man's game.

Some prefer nights, others mornings.

What exactly are you talking about?

Your Nazar, by the way, was mowing

his lawn right under my window.

And it's incredibly loud.

And no matter how many times

I asked him to stop, he just ignored me.

Like I said,

some people like to mow in the evening,

some during the day.

What did you think I meant?

Don't bother arguing with him.

I've known Nazar since school.

He doesn't listen to reason.

So I should talk to him in sign language?

Don't talk, act.

Actions speak louder than words.

Not words, but

Well, never mind.

Why am I so twisted today?

Come on, I'll show you something

behind the haystacks.

What are these sticks?

Sticks?

Ah, Anna of Kyiv, you know nothing

of the soul of the Ukrainian mountains:

The trembita.

Oh, look, this beauty here, it's the

longest musical instrument in the world.

It's an ancient Hutsul gadget.

Yes, the trembita carried news

between neighboring villages.

And now, they're even donating with it.

Of course.

Could you at least not smoke inside?

There's no smoke here.

It's modern technology.

I can smell smoke. And an unpleasant odor.

How can you smell something

that isn't there?

There's no combustion,

so there's no smoke.

Just vapor.

And this is a regular window,

and it works perfectly.

Smoking is harmful to your health.

You're my Meshkety

Oh, thank you for the rest

This is my dream vacation

I don't know a better place

For my vacation

My gorgeous hair

- Didn't they teach you to knock?

- I did knock.

What's that?

I said, I knocked!

Why are you yelling?

It's the middle of the night.

Could you please stop singing?

I can't sleep.

Is it my voice

or my song choice you dislike?

I dislike that you're keeping me awake.

As a very wise man once said,

"If you can't sleep,

you're probably not that tired."

Close the door behind you.

I'm a magnificent creature

With magnificent hair

And I have magnificent hair

Hey, champ!

Listen, Annusya, don't go

snapping your neck out there.

We've had our share of athletes here,

you know.

One guy twisted himself up so bad,

they had to cart him off to the med tent.

Good afternoon.

Thank you for your concern

about my well-being.

Of course we care! You're our guest.

So are you and Nazar patching things up?

Patching things up?

More like fighting like cats and dogs.

Hey, shut your trap.

What's with all the whining?

What did you say, Annusya?

I'm telling you,

Nazar and I are the best of friends.

He's got a heart of gold.

You have such beautiful scenery here.

Yeah, you know, when I first moved here

from Vinnytsia, I was all about the views.

But then I realized the real beauty

of this village

isn't in the landscape at all.

What do you mean?

It's about people, Annusya. About people.

- I'm Anna.

- Yes, Anna.

It's not the place that graces the person,

but the person that graces the place.

God, we have so many good people here.

And why go far?

Take your buddy, for example.

I swear, there's not a house

in the village where he hasn't helped.

God, what a good man.

Who are you talking about?

Your friend, Nazar. Well, my nephew.

Move a little.

Ever since his parents died,

he's been my family.

He's like my own heart.

I didn't know they died. What happened?

Car accident.

Drunk tourist, head-on collision.

They were both k*lled instantly.

He was fine, but they

Nazar was only ten.

I was so afraid he'd turn bitter,

you know? Against the whole world.

But he didn't.

He grew up to be the kindest soul.

The very kindest. And now, this w*r

It changes people so much, Annusya.

So much.

They look the same on the outside,

but inside, they're different.

Forever changed.

Those eyes

They hold so much pain, so much sadness.

I can't even look into them.

I'm afraid to ask him about the w*r.

I worry he'll remember something that

will hurt him deeply, and he'll suffer.

So I leave his soul alone.

You understand?

Listen, I've been meaning to ask,

why does everyone bring him food?

He's a grown man.

It's how we show we care.

But is that really the right thing to do?

There's no manual for this.

If only there were.

Everyone's different, especially soldiers.

We show our support and love through food.

We We show our support

and love through food.

Now I'm craving gombovci!

Gombovci?

We were talking about food,

and now I'm starving.

What are gombovci?

Oh, they're delicious!

Kind of like a cheese pancake,

but way better.

Why don't I make you some for dinner?

I'll bring them over, okay?

Great. They're so good.

Come on, sweetie, let's go.

Excuse me. Could you tell me how to get

to Meshkety village? Do you know it?

Hey! You go this way, turn left.

Straight first, then left?

No, no, no. Turn right up ahead,

then that way. There'll be a sign.

Okay, thank you so much!

Have a good evening. Goodbye.

How vulgar!

What's going on here, ma'am?

I was just I was looking for my

Looking for what?

My earring.

I lost an earring, and

Listen, stop feeding me lies

and quit playing dumb.

Though I have to admit,

the act suits you well.

Stop it. You cheap city call girl!

Andre Tan. Latest collection?

You know what? Keep it.

At least you'll have one

designer item in your wardrobe.

Please, I'll pass.

That kind of thing only suits call girls.

Like you!

Call girl, call girl

Is that the only word you know?

Maybe you'll finally start reading books?

Or watch some decent movies for a change?

Oh, now you're the teacher?

With your crappy advice?

I'm a business lady.

Business lady?

You're about as lady as a pig in mud.

You know what, "lady"?

I'm gonna teach you a lesson.

If your parents didn't teach you not to

touch other people's things, then I will.

Oh, you think so?

Enjoy your meal, cow.

Get out of here, you little harlot!

You know what? I paid for three days here,

and I'm staying

whether you like it or not.

And don't think I haven't noticed

the way you look at him.

You should leave this village.

It'd be better for you.

Go drink your lavender lattes

back in Kyiv.

I don't like lavender lattes.

I have a weakness for cappuccinos.

You know, they told me the people

in this village were wonderful,

but I guess every crowd has

its black sheep.

Says the sheep.

And you don't get to decide

who lives here and how.

This isn't your house.

You can't kick me out.

Not yet.

Oh, you!

No one touches my hair

except me and my stylist.

Don't touch my hair!

Nazar!

What's with the sneak attack?

Your crazy fan was snooping

through my stuff.

Zlatka?

I was looking for my earring.

You don't have pierced ears.

- Gotcha, liar!

- No offense.

No offense?

I'm the one who's been offended.

She barges into my place,

rummages through my suitcase,

then insults and nearly kills me.

Is it normal for you people to touch

other people's stuff? You're a pervert!

Says the pervert!

Quiet!

So I'm the one touching

other people's things?

Did I break into someone's house?

Yeah, an invader.

- Call me an invader again, and you'll get

- No hands.

Then control your crazy neighbor.

Says the crazy one.

Quiet!

Nazar, I'm not one for conflict.

I'll say this one last time:

My secretary booked this place

It doesn't matter what she did.

What matters is,

I have every right to be here,

and I demand some basic respect.

Maybe it's time

to stop crossing lines, huh?

Am I crossing lines?

Am I the one who broke into a house?

Ruined a vacation?

My long-awaited vacation?

Well, I had a long-awaited vacation too,

one I definitely wasn't planning

to spend here.

It's not my fault your roads

washed out, and I'm stuck in this

This amazing place.

I'm telling you for the last time:

I was sent here by mistake.

Sent?

What are you, a package?

A parcel? A letter?

A parcel

All right.

Here's what I owe Aunt Mariyka.

And this too.

Will this be enough?

Have a great vacation.

- Nazar!

- Go away.

Hey, folks!

Hello, everyone!

Could you tell me,

is this Meshkety village?

There's been a lot of people

looking for Meshkety lately.

- Excuse me. I don't follow.

- Never mind

This is funny. Watch this.

Oh, you are lost.

- Seriously?

- Yes.

You need to go that way.

Wait, hold on.

They just sent me here from over there.

Meshkety is that way.

Okay, thanks.

Have a good evening.

Likewise.

Honey, my little ray of sunshine,

I'm close!

Some hero lover he is.

I've never seen one like him before.

Yes, good.

Stay there. I never liked you.

I'll buy a new one later.

Oh, Lord have mercy! What's happened?

Everything's fine.

I brought you some gombovci.

The cheese isn't as fine as your father's,

of course,

but they smell just wonderful.

Thank you,

but I'm not hungry.

Well, you might not be,

but Annusya should try them.

Where is she?

Anna's gone.

When will she be back?

They should be eaten warm.

She's left the village.

But the roads are washed out!

How did she leave?

I'm telling you, she's gone.

And you let her go?

In the middle of the night?

Through the woods?

I know these women's tricks.

She's probably just out back,

having a smoke.

No one's out there smoking.

I just checked.

This isn't good, Nazar.

Annusya! Annusya!

What the hell?

No, no, no!

Don't eat me.

I'm toxic.

I smoke and drink. A lot lately.

And I breathe in exhaust fumes. A lot.

I'm not exactly all-natural,

like you all seem to want to eat.

This is the end, Anna Vitaliivna.

Get a grip, Anna Vitaliivna!

Come on, pull yourself together!

You?

Oh, you're the one who wanted to eat me.

You refer to yourself by your full name?

Nazar!

Nazar!

Okay, okay, okay.

Calm down.

- Only in stressful situations.

- I see.

Here.

Aunt Mariyka made these for you.

- What are they?

- They're gombovci.

She mentioned something like that.

You want some?

No, thanks. Not hungry.

I'm starving. I could eat a horse.

Bon apptit.

These are delicious.

By the way, how did you find me?

I grew up here.

I know every inch of this place.

Plus, you made it

pretty easy to find you.

They're my favorite. Thank you.

And thanks for saving me, by the way.

One more thing.

You're about to hear something exclusive.

Something no one's heard in a long time.

Be attentive.

And I'm sorry.

For what?

For being so emotional,

for acting like such a bit

I get it.

Listen.

I'm sorry too.

For being too harsh.

At times.

At many times.

It's a little cold.

One moment.

Oh, thank you.

Is it better?

Sure.

You know,

I've only sat by a campfire like this

once in my life.

In Crimea.

I remember the sea.

I remember "Camp Mriya,"

cheap rum-cola

And a guitar.

We sang so much.

I've never been to the sea.

Seriously? Why not?

I wanted to, but couldn't.

Then, when I finally could,

Crimea got annexed.

Well, this is my first time

in the Carpathians.

So high up.

And these mountains

And honestly,

this is my first vacation in

I don't even know how long.

I've been working

as long as I can remember.

Although, when I was a kid,

I loved hiking,

and I even dreamed

of living in a little house

in the woods somewhere.

I wanted so much to succeed,

to have everything,

to be free, independent

That at some point

I turned from Anya

into Anna Vitaliivna.

Who lives in the best

residential complex in the capital,

drives the best cars,

wears only designer clothes

and completely forgot what she dreamed of.

And sometimes I just want to stop.

Feel the clouds in my hair.

Take a deep breath.

To know someone stronger is here,

accepting me, even at my worst.

I've never been on vacation.

Not abroad, not even anywhere in Ukraine.

I'm sorry.

So.

Well, I can't promise

any trips abroad right now

But I'll show you the best places here.

We're on vacation, right?

Yeah.

You've never seen

the Carpathians like this.

Think of me as your personal guide.

And what does a personal guide dream of?

You know,

it's late.

We should get some sleep.

Right. Of course.

And you?

Salli and I will keep watch here. Okay?

All right.

Good night, then.

Good night.

What?

Should I have told her I liked her?

I should have.

Remember when you asked me about my dream?

This This is it.

What is it?

It's our family's cheese dairy.

My father, his father,

their fathers before them,

they all made bryndza here,

following a secret family recipe.

I want to continue that tradition.

When this w*r is over,

I'll rebuild the dairy,

as long as I can still

remember the recipe.

That's an amazing idea.

You really think so?

Yeah, I've got goose bumps.

Are you hungry?

I'm starving.

Did you know that bryndza is packed

with life-giving energy?

It gets it from the medicinal herbs

that grow right here in the Carpathians.

It improves the eyesight.

I can already see better.

It's great for your stomach,

and it's loaded with calcium.

Wow. I must be loaded with calcium by now.

Plus

They call it

"Hutsul aphrodisiac."

You know, it

Boosts your overall energy.

Got it. Energy boost.

Hey, have you ever been

to a village for Kupala Night?

Never even been to a village,

let alone Kupala Night.

Then I know what we're doing tonight.

Guys!

Wow, she's stunning! Nice one, Nazar!

Oh, Mrs. Kylyna.

Is this for me?

Thank you.

Here in Transcarpathia, we don't say,

"Summer's here. Kupala Night brought it."

We say, "Cimborove, parades"

Ladies and gentlemen, attention, please!

Let's hear some noise!

With us tonight,

Deejay Father of the Bride,

emcee Best Man.

Welcome to the party!

Tonight we have

a very special guest,

a defender,

a soldier of the Ukrainian Armed Forces,

Nazar Naumenko.

From the very first days

of the w*r, this local hero

volunteered to defend

our country and all of us.

Thank you so much, Nazar.

We'd love to hear from you, Nazar!

Honestly, I wasn't prepared.

What can I say?

Thanks.

Thanks for the kind words.

Thank you to everyone who donates.

It means a lot.

And thanks to everyone

who helped me not to lose weight.

Thank you, Nazar! Glory to Ukraine!

Glory to the heroes!

All right, everyone,

let's form a circle and dance!

We'll kiss everyone who dances!

Are you coming with us

to float the wreaths?

Whichever wreath reaches the shore first,

that girl will be the first to marry.

Let's go, let's go!

We're going.

Good news, Annusya. They fixed the road.

Does that mean I'm free to go?

Bon voyage!

Yeah.

You know,

Meshkety is a really unique place.

The people are a bit quirky,

but it's actually starting to grow on me.

Well,

you've definitely fit right in.

What's that supposed to mean?

Humor, Annusya. It's our lifeline.

Sometimes it feels like without it,

we'd all have lost our minds long ago

from all the events, all the news,

everything that's been happening

to us these last few years.

This w*r's taught us one thing:

Life can't wait.

We have to live it now.

Petro Vasyliovych, what are you doing?

Let's dance! Come on, let's go!

Come on. Let's go. Let's go.

I'm glad the road's washed out.

Compliments aren't your strong suit.

Anna, we've finally found you.

Inna Ivanivna?

What are you doing here?

And you?

When our Slovak partners

received the materials you sent,

they immediately confirmed the deal

and invited us to

Bratislava for the signing.

We're leaving now,

and you're coming with us.

What materials?

Who are these people?

Listen, Nazar,

this is my job.

Look, I don't understand the rush here.

Our Slovak partners are eager to

start construction as soon as possible.

Construction?

Anya,

what's going on?

In your what do you call them?

Meshkety.

Right, your Meshkety will be the site

of a large international

luxury spa resort.

This place will soon be a gold mine,

attracting foreign tourists

from all over Europe.

A spa resort?

One of the largest in Europe.

We're going to pave over

all this old stuff with concrete

and build a Las Vegas here.

Did you even ask us?

Nazar

Do you really think

we'd pursue an international deal

without the proper paperwork?

We have all the permits, right?

Yes, even from the local

tae Kwon do association, just in case,

and signed consent forms

from the residents.

But

What signatures?

They're expecting us in Bratislava.

Let's not waste any time.

Don't worry, Anna.

Your contribution to this deal

will be handsomely rewarded.

You're looking at

a very substantial bonus.

And I'm looking at

a lucrative business and major profits.

Bonus?

Let me explain. I'll tell you everything.

I've heard enough.

Nazar!

Petro Vasyliovych, the village head.

What's going on?

Inna Ivanivna,

managing partner

of the future international spa complex,

the largest in Eastern Europe.

Ivanivna? It's your celebration!

Oleg!

Madam, how about I give you a tour?

You can bring your ponies.

We have a famous horse here,

and you should see my Oleksa.

He's a beast!

He can take us

to any peak.

Oh, excuse me.

Buckle up. We're taking off.

Nazar, wait.

This isn't what it looks like!

- I meant well, you know?

- What does it look like?

I trusted you,

opened up,

and you made this all up?

- This blind vacation?

- I didn't make anything up.

- When I got back

- That's a lie!

Anna!

Bohdan?

What are you doing here?

My little mermaid, you recognize me.

Sunbeam, obstacles and suffering

have changed me beyond recognition,

but a loving heart can't be fooled.

Silence! You will be a witness.

May this sky, stars, mountains

- What's your name?

- Nazar.

And Nazar will witness my vow.

I haven't slept for days.

I climbed mountains, forests,

because I felt you wanted this.

- Bohdan, please, not now!

- Now.

- No.

- Will you marry me?

Sally, what are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

Excuse me. This is

Private property.

You?

- What are you doing here?

- I didn't make it in time.

I wanted to surprise you, but

Here.

This is for you.

Thank you.

But still, what are you doing in Meshkety?

I need to fix the mistake.

Nazar, listen.

Before I came to Meshkety,

my work was my entire world.

All those signatures, paperwork, photos...

That was before

I truly saw the people here.

You, all of you,

showed me a world I'd always dreamed of.

A beautiful world.

I won't let it be destroyed.

What about the Slovaks?

I spoke with them,

explained how much the people

of Meshkety love their village,

land, traditions, and they listened.

They're interested in investing

in a promising ecotourism venture,

and they want to start the revitalization

with your cheese factory.

But to make this happen

We need your signature right here

so they can release the first installment.

This investment will cover the renovation

and full equipment purchase.

If, of course, this is what you want.

What about Bohdan?

Bohdan

After I turned him down on live,

he became a millionaire blogger.

So his dream came true too,

and he's very happy.

Speaking of millions,

with your permission,

I took the liberty of drawing up

a business plan for you.

For the first year, of course.

We can start with renovation,

then set up production

Stop.

Turn off Anna Vitaliivna.

Yes, of course.

I had no right to

The documents are yours,

so you decide what you want.

Good luck.

Wait.

I

Be a part of my dream.

Is this a business proposal?

It's a proposal.