Attack of the 50ft Woman (1993)

[bunniefuu]

Here we go. Watch your step

Hello. Welcome to the Nancy Cobb-Archer

Visitor Center and Historic Landmark.

|'m Donna

Since it opened, this visitor center

has entertained and enlightened...

more than 200,000 people

such as yourselves...

who have come here to achieve

a greater understanding of the life

of one special American woman.

Step this way, won't you?

Everybody comfy?

Good

Please remain seated at all times

during the presentation.

Keep your hands on the armrests

and your feet flat on the floor.

lf you experience dizziness

at any time during the presentation

simply look away from the screen

Please, no flash photography

during the presentation.

lt's annoying and a complete waste of film

Okay? Everybody set?

How do you do?

My name is Dr. Victor Loeb

In this modem, supersonic age

it sometimes seems

...that we have lost


our capacity to be amazed

Science has rendered

the miraculous commonplace

and we have become smug

in our dominion over nature itself.

But I am well aware

that there are also among you

the morbidly curious

...who have been attracted

bythe more provocative and

...let’s not mince words,

lurid aspects of this case

You will not be disappointed

For this is, I must warn you

a shocking story...

but it is a story that must be told

Prepare your minds

for a new scale of experience

and remember.

everything you are about to see

is absolutely true.

My story begins on a day

not so different from any other.

lsuppose it could have happened anytime,

to any woman.

Looking back, I realize most of my days


were smothered in routine.

Safe, predictable routine

that felt so much like a life

All that was about to change

Cobb Enterprises

Sylvia?

-Yes.

lt's Mrs. Archer


-Hi.

l'm just calling to confirm

dinner with my father.

He has it on his calendar, Mrs. Archer.

lreminded him when he left

to meet with the Mayor.

Good. Can I speak to my husband, please?

l’m afraid he’s notin the office

lbelieve he mentioned a meeting


a meeting out of the office.

Do you know when he'll be back?

ldon’t know, Mrs. Archer.

He just said he had a meeting somewhere

Thanks

You’re welcome, Mrs. Archer.

-Bye.

Hello, Nancy

Good morning, Mr. lngersol

-How are you?

Fine. Yourself?

Fine, thanks

-Good.

What do you think?

lt won't feel the same coming into town

and not seeing your shop.

Progress, Nancy.

Not much one man can do to stop it

But I figure it's best for business

At least that's the way

yourfather explains it.

Yes. My father's good at explaining things

I don't know what shines brighter

you or that pendant.

I remember making it for your mother

l'm glad to see you wearing it

She'd be pleased.

Thankyou

I better get back to the till

-Bye, Mr. lngersol.

Bye, Nancy

I think l’ve got a pretty good handle

on most of the things in my life.

I know there are certain areas

where l’m having problems.

ladmit that, but l’m working on them

and things can change

People change

When I confronted Harry

he said he would stop...

that he'd end the affair

Have there been other affairs?

-This is different.

He loves me. He really does

lt's not easy being married

to the boss's daughter.

That's whyl have to be patient,

why it's important that I make life easier

Easier for whom?

Harry, my father

What aboutyou?

What about me?

How about making life easier for yourself?

-I have to go.

The hour isn't up

l'm having dinner with my father

He's on a tight schedule

he's expecting me.

Do you ever get angry?

Everybody gets angry

What do you do when you get angry?

What do you do when you get angry?

What do you do when you get angry?

Harry!

You promised!

He ain't here, Mrs. Archer

That's his car

Maybe he ran out of gas and he left it

He doesn't care who knows

Let's call it a night.

Go home, have some coffee maybe

l'm notdrunk

You don't have to be drunk to drink coffee

it's afree country.

Tell him

There is nobody here to tell, honest

-Please, just tell him.

Are you going to let a little thing like this

ruin the whole night?

There comes a point in a relationship

when you realize what your prospects are

We have plateaued

at the motel level of things, Harry

That is nowhere near good enough

for Miss Parker's little girl, honey.

You take this sort of thing too personal

-You betl do.

I have had a long time

to figure out women like that

Stupid, rich

l’ve been painting their fingernails

and washing their hair since I was 12

-sh*t!

Honey

Why do you put up with it?

Why do you make me put up with it?

Just leave. Walk out

She don't deserve you anyway

l'm not leaving till I can take

a big slice of old man Cobb's pie with me

So? Community property. Dump her

The old man made me sign a prenuptial

Jesus!

All we have to do is find the right angle

and we're set.

Every day I go into that office

...I find out where a couple

more skeletons are buried.

Just leave it up to Harry

Harry's got a handle on everything

You know what her real problem is?

Nancy? Yeah, like you said

she's spoiled and rich.

Her real problem is she actually loves you

There cheese on this dog?

-You didn't ask for cheese.

I don't ask for cheese

cause I always get cheese on my dog

lt's Mrs. Archer!

-Didn't see Mr. Archer with her.

Not unless she had him in the trunk

Cheese, Charlie

ls there a "P"?

No "P

l'd like to buy a vowel

That's Mrs. Archer

Hold the malted

-Yes, sir.

Jesus! This isjust so f*cking romantic

I could puke.

Mrs. Archer, are you okay?

What's the trouble?

It was out there. It touched me

It forced me off the road,

and then touched me with alight

What touched you?

I want Harry. I want my husband

Did someone try something out there?

It was big, and it lit up the sky like a

You've got to believe me

It was there

over the highway

We believe you, it's just that

Why don't you come sit in the squad car

and tell us all about it?

And we'll get you a nice big cup of coffee

I don't want any coffee

Why's everyone always

trying to pour coffee into me?

A woman has to have a limit

If she don't have a limit,

she is screwed from the get-go

You shouldn't let things like that

get to you, it causes wrinkles.

lt's her

-lt's not her.

It is, it's her

lt's her, with a g*n and an axe

and a bottle of acid.

-Straighten up the bed, will ya?

How stupid do you think people are?

Mr. Archer, it's Deputy Spooner.

Can I have a word with you, sir?

Evening

-Deputy.

Hi, Honey

-Charlie.

Can I help you with something, Deputy?

Yeah. I don't know if you heard,

but we had some commotion out there

Your wife had some trouble on the road

-What kind of trouble?

Spaceship

-Spaceship?

Ran her right off the road!

At least, that's what she said

Sheriff's taking her

back out to look around

You might wanna think

about getting home...

under the circumstances

Thanks for the advice

No charge

'Night, Honey.

Night, Charlie

Good-bye, Deputy

Yeah. 'Night

Nancy saw a spaceship

Ran her off the road

ls she crazy or something?

People who see spaceships

...these are not the kind of people

you want making important decisions

decisions about money

They need help

You’re thinking something, aren't you?

l'm thinking maybel should get home

to my poor, unstable wife

in her time of need.

That's my girl

Here

See? This is where

it forced me off the road

I see the skid marks

-But you don't believe me.

Look at it from my point of view

All I see are your tracks and nothin' else

It never touched the ground

You've got to believe me. I

There!

-What?

There! Can't you see?

Yeah, I can see it

Why'd you call him?

Part of the job

-Sheriff.

Mr. Cobb

Get in the car, l'll drive you home

I was trying to explain to the Sheriff-

-Get into the car.

Thanks for the call, Denby

-Yes, sir.

There won't be any tiresome paperwork

about this little incident, will there?

I think the young lady's

upset enough as it is.

Good night, Sheriff

Good night, sir

A spaceship?

My God, why are you trying

to destroy me?

I saw it

I cut short a meeting with the Mayor

to have dinner with you.

The Mayor

Then I get a call from this female deputy

Come get your hallucinating daughter

Why can't you admit for one second

thatl might be telling the truth?

lt's your mother all over again

-I saw something.

You saw nothing!

lwill not be made

the laughingstock of this town

What about the papers I signed yesterday?

-Today there are more.

Give the girl a break, Hamilton

Nancy, you look tired.

Why don't you toddle off to bed

Yes, father

Go on upstairs, baby. Your dad and I

have some business to discuss.

l'll be right up

How'd your meeting go with the Mayor?

l'll worry about the Mayor,

you worry about keeping her in line

And for God's sake

...can't you come up with anything

more discreet than Tony's Shangri-la?

I don't see where what I do

is any of your business.

I don't care if you cheat on your wife

but I won't permit you to embarrass me

especially not now...

...when l'm this close to getting

the okay for the zoning switch.

Make awish

You’re cold

Not that cold

Why did you lie to me?

You said you weren't going to

see her anymore.

That's what I was up there telling her

I had to tell her, didn't I?

I had to tell her face-to-face, didn't I?

I don't know what l'd do

ifl didn't have you.

What happened?

You got so involved in Daddy's business

No, baby. I mean tonight.

What happened out in the desert?

I don't want to talk about it

You'll think l'm crazy

Why would I think a thing like that?

I saw something

in the sky

Sheriff!

-You seen anything?

No. Nothing to report

Hard Luck" Eddie. lt's "Hard Luck" Eddie

Evening, Eddie

What are you doing out this way, Denby?

-Just doing myjob.

You ain't got no claim out here

This here's my mountain.

You seen anything out here tonight?

-Like what?

-Like something unusual.

This here's the desert, girlie girl

What you call unusual

don't mean much around here

Did you see something or not?

l’ve seen plenty.

l’ve seen hailstones as big as your head

l’ve seen lightning sh**t out of the ground

into the clouds.

I heard stuff, too

When the wind gets tangled up

in them power lines...

...it makes the wires sing

like a crazy woman in love

Thirty years out here

Ain't nothing unusual to me

-Thanks a lot.

Don't mention it, Sheriff

Don't mention what?

What do you figure she saw?

Could have been some kid in a hot rod

or ajet or helicopter from the air base

I suppose it could have been

something else.

Like what? Like a spaceship?

Suppose it was a real spaceship she saw

A genuine flying saucer!

I saw pictures of one in Life magazine

all lit up like a Ferris wheel.

Wouldn't that be something?

A real spaceship landing right here

Do you know what that'd mean?

lsure do

Overtime. A whole lot of overtime

Who is it?

Those glasses are new. I like them

Principles of Accounting and Management?

That's new, too.

A girl's got to plan for the future

-You don't have any future.

You can take night courses from now

till you stop being pretty...

and you still won't have any future

not with Harry Archer.

Maybe that's not the wayl see it

You don't see anything past the end

of that beautiful little nosel paid--

Harry only wants what I want

He doesn't have the imagination

to want anything else.

He doesn't love you, he hates me

You talked to her like this, didn't you?

Chipping away,

making her feel smaller and smaller

This is how you talked to your wife,

and how you talk to your daughter, isn't it?

lt's one thing to be smart

_.it's another thing to be smart

all the way around the block.

You've still got a way to go

ls there anything in particular you want?

Yes. l’ve

l'm anticipating some changes

Once I take care of the Mayor

and the boys on the council...

things are going to move pretty quickly

0?

So a word to the wise

Don't get in the way

What could I do?

You?

Nothing

But Harry might try something

He can't stop me,

but he can interfere with me

Tell him to keep his head down

and his uninspired thoughts to himself

Why don't you tell him yourself?

I already have,

but you get more of his attention than I do

Anything else?

I have an emergency set of tips to do

Take care of him, and there might be

a few bucks in it for you down the line

Who knows?

A word in the owner's ear,

you could be promoted to the first chair

Maybe I want more than first chair

and a couple of lousy bucks.

Don't want more

than you got coming to you

you'll end up with nothing at all

I suppose it's all over town

What is?

Last night's fiasco

What exactly happened last night?

Do you like the garden?

I try to keep it as nice as my mother did

but it's hard.

I don't know how she managed

lt's a gift, I suppose.

Harry told me

you had an experience last night

An experience is a nice generic term,

accurate without any messy details.

I like details

Ask Harry or my father or the Sheriff

l'm asking you

lfl tell you, you'll just get the face

The face?

The "poor Nancy" face

l’ve had just about as much of that

as I can take.

l'm a pretty good poker player

Why don't you give it a try?

I saw something

in the sky

A spaceship

Yes?

ls this how it started with my mother?

-You’re not your mother.

But is this how it started?

I mean, seeing things, acting crazy?

There's a big difference

between acting crazy and being crazy

Do you believe I saw something?

Don't say that you believe

I believel saw something.

You call me on it when I try to

squirm out of one of your questions

Now it's your turn

Do you believe me?

€S

Thoughtyou'd get away

without seeing me?

Nancy told you

about her little close encounter?

Just what do you want me to say?

That she's insane because she saw a UFO

that she's incompetent?

Maybe it runs in the family

Like mother, like daughter

l'm late for a meeting

I can't help thinking,

under the circumstances

...it would be better if Nancy

were to spend a little time, you know

inside someplace

I thought men like you vanished

with the dinosaur and woolly mammoth

but here you are, big as life. Amazing

ls that a scientific opinion?

lt's a very unscientific, very female opinion

Excuse me

Why'd you call Dr. Cushing?

I thoughtyou mightwant

to talk things out.

lwas worried aboutyou

You think l'm crazy

You have to admit, that's quite a story

-lt's true.

Great

You might want to think about

getting away. Get some rest.

-A sanitarium, like my mother.

That might bejust what you need

Whatl need is a little proof of whatl saw

I wish I could make you go out there

and see for yourself.

And ifl don't see anything?

What do you mean?

We'll go out there to try to find this thing

If we find it, or any part of it

you'll get a public apology from me

your father, the Sheriff, everyone.

But...

But?

If we don't find anything,

you promise to sign yourself up

for a little supervised relaxation

I saw something

l'll drive

Any particular search pattern in mind?

Or you want to poke around

until the Pacific Ocean?

After town, we'll go into the hills

then we'll take the long way home

on the old country road.

-And if we don't see anything?

Then we'll do it all over again.

lt's Mr. and Mrs. Archer

You figure they patched things up?

Getting late

Am I supposed to just go quietly?

Come on. l'll take you to dinner

You want to stay out here

with the scorpions all night?

I don't know what went wrong, but

What the hell's wrong with that thing?

There! I told you

Look at it!

I see it

lt's real!

You didn't believe me!

Nobody believed me, but it's real!

-Shut up! You want it to see us?

Who cares, as long as you see it?

Wait until my father hears about this

sh*t!

Help me!

Don't leave me!

Honey." Did your mother call you that?

Or was it somebody else?

Mrs. Archer?

lt's a sweet name

It suits you

You must be very sweet

to have such a sweet name

You and I should talk

We could have lunch

Do you eat?

How'd you get up here?

lt's our secret

Baggage

Why do I always fall for guys

with so much baggage?

Come on. Let's get you some coffee

Come on. Let's go

You’re paranoid, old man.

The stress is getting to you

ls that the sort of line you've been

feeding her? You’re an amateur.

l’ve had a pretty good teacher

Get out!

l'm sorry, Doctor

-She's resting.

Yes, good. Resting

She still doesn't remember

what happened to her?

No, but it'll come back to her

-Itwill?

That's how hysterical amnesia works

It burns off a little at a time, like a fog

And then she'll be able

to tell us everything.

Physically, she's all right

but I want to talk to the doctor

about her blood tests.

ls something wrong?

-I don't think so.

But the hormone levels indicate

that the tests were run improperly

But she's all right, you said that

She's not talking about seeing things

...or anything that would indicate

she has any kind of, you know, problems

Like a breakdown?

Can you conceive of

keeping your mouth shut for five minutes?

You don't care about her condition

As long as she can still sign your papers

so you can keep the money moving.

Dr. Cushing, could you please

give me a ride back into town?

Go back upstairs. You need your rest

I need to get away from here.

Everybody here thinks l'm crazy

l'm not crazy

Of course you're not, baby

If you want to leave,

l'll take you wherever you want to go

l'm not letting you spirit her away

...before she tells us

what you did to her in the desert

Please!

She's going to tell me

everything that happened

I don't remember anything

-You see?

Don't try to force her to lie for you

-Please, don't fight.

Don't worry. I can handle him

Like you handled her mother?

You really don't know when to shut up

do you?

You went through her money

like itwas yours.

You made her life so miserable

there was nothing for her to do

except k*ll herself!

Stop it!

Stay out of this!

-Not now!

Shutup!

Don't you talk about my mother that way

Don't talk about me that way!

I am here! I am in this room!

l'm a person! I am not a chair, or a

What is it?

-Get away from her!

You get away from her!

Gentlemen!

Dr. Cushing, what's happening to me?

Dr. Cushing, l'd like you to meet

a colleague, Dr. Victor Loeb.

Doctor

I warned you about bringing in

anyone from the outside.

You may be able to see to her

mental condition...

but you're not qualified to look after

her physical well-being.

Dr. Loeb is

Come with me, Doctor

l'll just wait out here

l'm afraid Harry wasn't very specific

when he phoned.

Just what is Mrs. Archer's condition?

Unique

Don't make any sudden moves

l'd like you to meet Dr. Loeb

He's here to help you.

Dr. Loeb,

l'd like you to meet Nancy Archer

My God!

Doctor?

This is impossible

That takes a load off my mind

I thoughtl had a problem.

Twenty-four hours ago,

she was a normal-sized woman

Note the hormone levels

The levels are anomalous,

but they couldn't accountfor that

l'm not a "that"!

Of course you're not

I don't care what caused it,

I just want someone to fix it

We must get her

to a controlled therapeutic environment

I have a private clinic. lt's very secluded

-That's why Harry--

A sanitarium? No, l'm staying here

Mrs. Archer

Nancy, don't you want the security?

l'm staying here!

Yes, I think home treatment

would be less stressful for everyone

Don't worry about money

Anything you want, you can have

Just ask my father.

You were supposed to get her

into your sanitarium.

That's why I called you

-She didn't want to go.

You should have talked her into it

Under the circumstances, any argument

with Nancy would be very one-sided.

What made her grow like that?

You said she began to grow

after becoming agitated.

Clearly, it's stress-related

The blood levels indicate

some kind of hormonal imbalance

Terrific, you've discovered

a new kind of PMS.

The situation is serious

-You’re telling me?

The human body wasn't designed

to grow that large.

l'm concerned about the strain

You mean like on her heart.

She could have a heart attack

Try to understand

Right now your wife has

the blood pressure of an adult giraffe

lt's all boilerplate.

You don't have to look at them

How am I supposed to sign these?

-You don't have to.

You use the paint to sign the cardboard

Then I take your signature

...and I reduce it

and put it on the documents

l’ve spoken to the lawyers about it

and they say under the circumstances

it's essentially legal

Blow them up

-What?

If they can reduce my signature,

they can enlarge those contracts

Get a billboard painter or something

I want that fine print 6 feet tall.

I simply will not have

the details of my business

pasted on the side of a barn

for the world to see.

Then find a new business, 'cause

l'm not signing until I can read them

You've had a long day

l'm sure it's been very stressful

Perhaps you ought to

Perhaps you ought to go back in the

I mean, go back in and rest

I like being out here looking at the stars

Of course you do.

We all like the stars. They're very pretty

But you have to take care of yourself

You have to--

Father, l'm not a little girl

No, you're not

But you need your rest

You have to protect your strength

so the doctors can make you better

You mean make me like I was before

Yes, just as you were before

lsn't that what we all want?

l'll go back in the stable

Good

In a little while

That'll be fine

Good night, Father

Good night, Nancy

Jesus, she's big!

I mean big!

How'd she get so big?

Something in that UFO

bollixed up her hormones

I cannot get over how big she is

The doctors think being that size

puts a strain on her heart.

She gets dizzy

Probably the altitude

They think she might have a heart attack

I doubt they'd be surprised

if she keeled over like a mighty redwood

A little stress, some anger

some aggravation and, "Timber

I don't know

She looks pretty healthy to me

Better than she did on that roof,

poor thing.

You think we could sell the carcass

to Ringling Brothers?

Maybe you shouldn't try

to be so funny all the time

Come and look at the stars with me

Are you all right?

I mean, do you feel okay, otherwise?

My heart starts beating faster than normal

Would you like to feel it?

No, that's okay. l'll take your word for it

The Doctor said it's all right,

as long as I don't get too worked up

That's an important thing to remember

about not getting too worked up.

Otherwise, I feel just fine

Great. I guess l'll turn in

Good night, Nancy.

I was wondering about something

Wondering aboutwhat?

Aboutwhat would happen

ifl told the Sheriff...

how you took me out to the desert

and simply left me there?

What do you think

people would make of that?

That's not what happened

Suppose that's whatl tell them happened?

Suppose for once, people believe me

instead of somebody else?

You wouldn't do it

I know you too well.

You don't have the nerve

Maybe l’ve changed

Go inside

Are you sure you're all right?

-Go inside.

And don't make any plans

for dinner tomorrow night

You and I have a lot to discuss

Will your father bejoining you?

He has a meeting with the town council

Tonight's just for Harry and me.

Do you want to make sure the truck

is positioned where you want it?

If it isn't, l'll move it myself, later

-I suppose you could.

The world is my dollhouse

You seem to have made

a certain adjustment to your condition

l'm not saying the old Nancy

still isn't in me.

I can hear her inside,

rattling around in the dark

bumping into things, always apologizing

But less and less

Less and less

They've all gone. Would you mind

coming outside for a moment?

l'm due for a stretch

Due for a stretch!

Can I give you a lift?

No, thank you

How can we grow as women

if we can't trust each other?

-Doctor, what are you doing?

Doing? I am merely taking a..

So what's in this amazing colossal spike?

Just avitamin soup

with a mineral supplement chaser

And?

Doctor?

Vitamins and minerals, as I said

-And?

And a very mild tranquilizer

Valium? Or that stuff

they use on racehorses?

There's no need for this

I disagree.

The situation is difficult enough

without running the risk

of anxiety on her part.

I have the husband's authority

and the permission of her father

What about my permission?

lt's really for your own good

You’re the one who looks like

he's having a little anxiety, Dr. Loeb

Maybe you need this more than me

I don't like needles

Nice try

You ready?

Ready

O

How'd I do?

That's good!

That's good

g*n oil. I like the smell ofgun oil

Yeah, it's a good smell

My mamma hates it

She doesn't think it's a ladylike aroma

Of course, she's pretty much given up

trying to make a lady out of me.

She thinks law enforcement is un-feminine

I tell her it's the onlyjob with any future

in this stubby old town.

Deputy, this stubby old town

pays your salary.

No disrespect

A woman doesn't have too many

options here, if you know whatl mean

Yeah, I supposel do

Sheriff?

Have you ever been in love?

l'm just curious

Aboutwhat?

About how it is with somebody

like Mrs. Archer.

Her and Mr. Archer, I mean

Doesn't make sense to me

That's 'cause it's none of your business

-He isn't very nice to her.

I just don't understand the way it is

with women like that.

Don't they know what they're getting into?

Can't they see?

lfigure it's like it is

with old "Hard Luck" Eddie

The old prospector who's here every month

after he drinks up his government check?

He's been going out to that desert

for as long as I can remember.

Looking for gold, looking for silver

looking for uranium.

Punching holes in those mountains

till they whistle in a windstorm...

and he always comes up empty

Why does he do it?

Cause if he stops looking

...he's got to explain to himself

what he's been doing the last 30 years

If he quits,

he makes himself a fool for trying

But so long as he keeps going

at least he's got hope.

Maybe the next claim will pay off,

or the one after that.

There comes a point

when hope's all there is

So you hold on

long past the point when common sense

tells you, you should let go.

It can get that way with people, too

You keep on giving and giving

because they need so much, and then

maybe if you give a little more

they'll be satisfied. Maybe.

ls that love?

No, that's not love

That's the thing people call love

when they don't want to feel like

they've wasted their lives.

Welcome home

Like the outfit?

lt's something

I have dinner waiting

on the rooftop garden

California chardonnay,

not too pricey when you buy in bulk

Cheers

lsn't this romantic?

You bet

lt's a lovely night

Yeah. A peach

The stars seem so close

close enough to touch.

Close enough to hear you whisper

When was the last time you and I

sat down like this and had dinner?

We've never sat down like this

and had dinner.

I mean in general. You and I, as a couple

Lots of times

We don't talk enough

-We're talking now.

No, I mean really talk

This thing that's happened to me

I think it could bring us closer together

if we give it half a chance.

Sure. What do you want to talk about?

Have you ever thought much

about Gulliver’s Travels?

-A bo ut wh at?

Gulliver’s Travels

The book, Gulliver’s Travels?

-That's right.

I can't say as I have

I have, quite a bit

l’ve started to think of myself as Gulliver

...suddenly surrounded

by all these toys and playthings

And l’ve begun thinking

about the possibilities.

Exactly what possibilities

are we talking about here?

Adventure, new dimensions, new horizons

Leave the manicurists and the c*ck

waitresses down in the foothills...

and look up

You don't want to get rid of me

Who said anything

about getting rid of you?

You don't want me

in some sanitarium or a zoo

Think about it

You'd be the envy of every man alive

There are pleasures waiting for you

that no one has even dreamed of.

Imagine, love on the scale of Gulliver

You’re thinking about it. I can tell

Are you crazy?

You are crazy! What are you suggesting

Jesus, this is sick!

-Sick?

Unnatural and sick and freakish!

Who precisely are you calling a freak?

You. l'm calling you an immense mistake

and an enormous, pathetic freak

l'm trying to share something with you

l'm trying to save our marriage!

By suggesting that you and I

What did you expect me to do,

get a wet suit and a flashlight?

You son of a b*tch!

You were sad before,

now you'rejust a big joke!

If you knew half what Honey Parker knows

about being a real woman ....

Insect! Tick!

I offer you a landscape

and you cling to a glass doorknob

Honey's better in bed than you ever were!

She's even better than your cousin Vera!

Vera? You slept with Vera?

|'|| k*ll her

But first l'm going to pop your head

like a little Concord grape!

Come on, baby

Men

Yes!

Little past your curfew, isn't it?

Thought l'd stop by

and see how you're doin

l'm doin' like l'm usually doin

I got you a little surprise

Such as?

Look at this

What happened?

Timber

The moon is shining bright

along the Wabash

"Through the hills,

there comes a breath of new-mown hay

"Through the sycamores,

the candlelights are gleaming

On the banks of the Wabash, far away

Clarissa, listen to me

Human beings are no better

than they ought to be.

ltwasjust an opinion

Clarissa!

You come back here

this very instant, or l'll

What's got into you?

Damn animal. Animal!

On the banks of the

Bud Powell

Not even close

Okay, is everybody all right?

Back in the desert ....

Call the Army, the Air Force, somebody!

-ls he on something?

You have got to believe me!

lt's her! She's coming!

That's Mrs. Archer

I can see that

Where's my husband?

'Evening, Mrs. Archer.

Good to see you up and about

-Where's Harry?

Don't you worry. We'll find him for you

I know where he is. He's with that woman

Stop!

l'll stop when I find Harry.

l'm just looking for a little closure

Don't do this

l’ve tried

l’ve really tried to be

all modern and adult and post-feminist

and look what it's gotten me

Now l'm taking matters

into my own hands.

What'll she do if she finds Harry?

Ball him up like a used Kleenex

Good

All right.

Everybody get into the squad car

l'm going to call the National Guard

and the State Police.

This is not a good situation

Yeah, baby?

Tell me you love me

-You knowl do.

I know you do,

but I want to hear you say it

Gentlemen

Congratulations

-Well done.

Excuse me

-Certainly.

Hamilton Cobb

What?

€S

No. That isn't

possible

Hamilton, isn't that your little girl?

For a dead woman,

she sounds awful healthy

Dead? She's not only alive, she's bigger

Did you try to k*ll her with a grow light?

-Shut up!

Can't you do anything right?

-What are you doing?

Somebody around here's

got to act like they've got ba*ls

Don't be stupid your whole damn life

You’re better than they are,

you're smarter than they are

and you know more than you think

We all do

Miss me?

I don't suppose

you want to hear my side of this?

What are they gonna do to them?

-What do you think?

Quick, maybe you can talk to her

What's going to happen, sir?

-Nothing.

At least not until we're past city limits

Then what, sir?

I don't know, Quimby. ljust don't know

All right, big woman.

Now you got nowhere to go

That’s far enough, ma’am

Just put the hostage down

and keep your hands up so we can see ’em

Make me

Doesn't seem right,

firing an air-to-ground m*ssile at a woman

Don't think of her as a woman

think of her as a target.

That's what I always do

Hold your fire until I give the signal

Here, you talk to her

-Me?

You’re her father. Talk to her

All right. lthink you’ve made your point.

Stop embarrassing me

in front of all these people!

How dare you talk to me that way!

lt's humiliating!

You treat me like such a child!

If you behaved like an adult,

you’d be treated like an adult.

Let’s keep family matters in the family.

We’ll talk when we get home

You don't care about me.

You never cared about me

You just need my name on some papers

so you can hide more money.

That's all you care about!

You don't love me,

you didn't love my mother

And this town, all you're interested in

is how much you can steal from it.

You've got a g*n.

Why don't you do something?

Like what, I suppose?

Sheriff!

Nobody fires until I say, "Fire

Fire!

What do you think you're doing?

-You and I have to talk.

Aboutwhat?

About how we're going to be

partners from now on.

Equal partners

Get out ofthe car

You know, it's funny

the things men will talk about in bed

They'll talk about anything

to keep from saying they love you

They'll talk about work, and about money

about substandard construction

and bribes and kickbacks...

when all a girl really wants to hear

are those three little words.

Now, what do you want?

Start the car

Dr. Cushing, what do you think

actually happened here tonight?

I don't know. I doubt we'll ever know

But I think Nancy finally got Harry

all to herself.

I believe, if we were really going

to be honest about this...

we'd all admit to being victims

...ofavery unrealistic

and limiting idea of manhood

You’re right. That's where all the anger

all the hostility comes from.

We've been cut off from the old definitions

of masculine and feminine.

That causes the basic insecurity

we all feel as men in the modern world

You can see what l'm saying, can't you?

Frankly, in my opinion,

I don't know what you're talking about

l'm not hostile, l'm not insecure

...and I don't have problems

with my manhood, never did

So whatever the trouble is,

one thing I know for sure is it's not me

But you can recognize

the destructive patterns in your life

and you're ready to change, right?

The destructive patterns!

Those destructive patterns

can be a real b*tch, right?

Whatever you do,

definitely avoid those destructive patterns

I really wish

you'd make an effort to participate

These sessions are for your own good

l'm participating.

Didn't you just hear me participating?

You just don't get it, do you?

Why can't you understand?

lt's notjust me that's changed

it's a whole new universe.

And it's up to you to catch up with us

Maybe you'll figure it out

Maybe. I hope so

Otherwise

Otherwise?

Try again

Again?

Again

Perhaps you'd like to share

some of the personal experiences

that broughtyou here.

Mind your own business

-You’re blocking.

Keep your nose out of it, too, pal

I think Harry has a lot of shame issues

that he needs to work on.

I think what Harry needs is a cold beer

Maybe we should do that trust exercise

That'd be a good way to show Harry

how we all feel about him.

Don't touch me!

Don't ever touch me, understand?

I really believe your

putting down that chair

...would be a good way

to start the healing process

-Back off!

I got him!

Let go!

Intervention is a sign of love

Yeah? Well, intervene this!