01x07 - The Oven Is Not Ready For Cakes

[bunniefuu]

The characters, plot, situations

and stories are purely fictional.

Any resemblance to fact

is purely coincidental.

Do you happen to have any chips

or snacks here?

[cop] What I have is little patience.

When did the conflict between Mama Cake

and Hans' criminal cartel start?

When did the hostilities begin?

I can fight on my own every day ♪

It's enough to believe

that a love will save me ♪

How can I know? ♪

I'm so frustrated ♪

[man] Sir.

Sir, your allergy.

-Are you sure they're laced?

-Yes, and strong.

Just look at Pecas.

He ate the glazed donut.

That won't wear off for a while.

So these cakes are reducing our clientele.

Sir, people speak

very highly of the product.

Mama Cake is considered a hit.

Mama Cake is disloyal!

[chuckles]

And brave.

It's a risky move.

But a stupid one.

Lobo,

I want to know everything

about this organization.

Who Mama Cake is,

who she works for, who supplies her,

their numbers, what weapons they carry.

I want to know what we're facing.

Sir, allow me to inform you

that what we know so far

is that the organization

is run by a woman.

[laughs]

-Another queen?

-No.

A grandma.

-What?

-But don't worry, sir.

I already have my best men on her.

Before you touch her,

I want to know

every last detail about this woman.

[theme music playing]

[Gloria] I'm sure of what I saw.

María and her lover

have a nursing home full of marijuana.

-María and Wences?

-Ah.

I see I'm the only one who hasn't heard

that María got over my dead brother.

I don't care.

I know what I saw,

and as a concerned citizen,

I ask you to investigate.

Yes, look, don't worry.

-I will personally take a look at it.

-What do you mean, "take a look"?

Why don't you give the order

to search that place?

Look, ma'am, it's not simple.

-I have

-Yes, I get it.

You won't believe me

because it doesn't suit you.

If María is in that business,

so is Xiadani.

-What are you accusing me of?

-Of the obvious.

If the nurse goes down,

you'll be investigated too.

I'm sure that farm has protection.

It's always the same

in this corrupt country!

[people chattering indistinctly]

Aurelia.

Ah, Wences.

You deserve an award

for your performance today!

[María] I believed it all, I really did.

I was really scared at first.

I was like, "God!"

Right?

Everyone has cooperated a lot

in helping you, María.

Albino, who is a vicious internet user,

won't stop watching videos

on herbalism and hydroponics.

He's responsible

for your Marías having so many children.

Thank you so much.

And Fede here, looking very weathered,

was a grenadier, and a tough one at that.

He makes sure that no one goes

down where the plants are.

[María] Thank you. I really appreciate it.

I just don't know

if I should continue with this.

It's given me some scary moments

and I don't want that for you.

What if you really do have a stroke?

And all because of my business.

-It doesn't seem right.

-María.

I have an idea.

For today, don't worry about it.

Let's take the day off.

What do you mean? I have to

Your people are in the food truck

and I have my people here.

Yes, but I

Come on.

Do it for your mental health

and for me.

Okay.

-I'll just send a little message

-[Aurelia] Hey, put it away.

No, put that away.

Cell phones k*ll the romance.

Trust me.

-Yes.

-[all chuckling]

Well, thanks again.

[Wences] I'll leave the business

to you, guys.

[Albino] Yes.

[Poncho] No way.

Whoever did this used their feet.

I WANT MY PALMIER

It's horrible. This is going to be short.

There it is. Let's see if it holds there.

If María finds out her grandson is here,

she'll k*ll us both.

[Jorge clears throat]

-[Poncho] Who worked on the truck?

-A good friend.

[Poncho] Did that good friend

live in prehistoric times?

There's a lot of problems.

The speaker doesn't even work.

All the wires were stripped.

There's no sound either.

Well, your grandma

really liked the discreet sound.

Well, she knows about baking,

but she really doesn't know about this.

It looks like I'm going to have

to be in charge of the remodeling.

-Of the speaker?

-Of everything.

See? The paint job is boring.

It doesn't even have rims.

And the engine still doesn't work well.

If only I hadn't gone to the jungle.

[tense music playing]

[Poncho] I'm going to fix this baby.

[whistling]

LOVE - BREAD

-Hello.

-Hello.

We're not open yet.

We'll be with you

when we finish setting up.

We just wanted to get some information.

We're getting married.

-Congratulations.

-Poor things.

We were told

that you could bake us a cake.

A wedding cake.

-Yes, with pleasure.

-Yes.

A happy cake.

The kind with the smiley face.

You want a happy cake for your wedding?

That's how I'm getting married!

[all laughing]

Because it's organic.

Gluten-free for people

with celiac disease.

[woman] No.

A cake with mari

From María, our star pastry chef.

Of course, I'll take your order.

Why don't we go into the sunlight

to talk about your wedding

and fine-tune the details?

Come this way.

[Jorge sighs]

I envy them. [clears throat]

How beautiful love is, right?

Especially in those early stages,

where you're so in tune with your partner

you seem to read their thoughts

and you haven't become

invisible to her yet.

Blue, this love is blue like the sea ♪

Blue ♪

As the blue sky was born ♪

[laughs] Forget about it.

I'm a hopeless romantic. You'll see.

You'll meet a woman

who you'll fall in love with,

who you'll go

to the ends of the earth for.

Who you'll yearn for.

The tests don't lie.

You consumed THC today.

What a shame.

Your exam was the best by far.

But the only thing I had today

was orange juice that I made myself.

And some cookies,

because I was nervous

and the sugar makes me

Here.

For your nerves and also for luck.

I'm sorry, I can't help you.

The law is clear.

It's best that you resign voluntarily.

That way we avoid

an investigation and a trial.

But I've worked harder than anyone.

This is my dream.

Your dream is over.

CAKES

[jazz music playing]

Bonjour, François.

Bonjour, madame.

How strange to find

so many cupcakes at this hour.

Lucky me, right?

Lucky for you, bad for the bakery.

Sales have not been going well lately.

[gasps]

[exclaims]

Don't tell me

you've been affected by Mama Cake too.

Oh, Oui.

People are lining up

to buy from Mama Cake.

They must be very good cupcakes.

I'll have to improve my quality.

[scoffs]

François, darling,

it's not their quality

that brings in the crowds,

but their ingredients.

[whispering] Marijuana.

[gasps]

Marijuana?

That's terrible.

Oui.

And the police won't do anything about it.

-[gasps]

-Because they're on their side.

You know, money.

I'm sorry you'll go bankrupt

because of drugs.

Bankrupt?

Oui.

Laying off employees,

selling your showcases, your oven.

-Closing the store.

-Oh

Returning to your country.

No.

Someone should stop them, don't you think?

Au revoir.

Aren't you going to take anything?

I haven't been to Xochimilco in ages.

I have so many beautiful memories.

But we'll catch up now.

I brought some cakes.

-The happy ones?

-Yes.

-I saved them for a special occasion.

-No.

-I'd rather not today, if you don't mind.

-Okay.

No, I want a trip, but back in time.

That's enough for me.

"Pretty María"!

Did you choose it?

Of course, my pretty María.

You're so thoughtful, sweetheart.

Here, take some flowers

for this beautiful woman.

-Thank you.

-Go ahead. Welcome.

Hello, welcome.

I'm Hortelano. I'll be your guide.

Please allow me to help you.

Be careful, it's a little slippery.

Sir, please, I'll help you too.

You bought the romantic tour as well.

All right, buddy.

You're going to love

the tour we've got planned.

Please come in. Sit down.

[María] The romantic tour?

Is there such a thing? [chuckles]

-[Hortelano] Let's go.

-I created it for you.

[laughs] You're so silly.

[playing loudly through speaker]

Mama of the mama ♪

-[Poncho] Cool, right?

-[Jorge] What?

Hey, why are there two different boxes?

I don't understand you.

Why are there different boxes?

Why does one have a smiley face?

Turn it off. I can't hear you.

[music stops]

I haven't even put new speakers in yet.

Did your grandma give you permission?

I didn't know I needed permission

to fix the truck I got.

-The truck is fine.

-So-so.

[man] You're coming with us.

What's going on? I don't understand.

-[Poncho] Let him go.

-Leave the kid.

Poncho doesn't know anything.

Relax. The kid doesn't know anything.

We're just going to talk a little.

All right, I'll go with you,

but leave him alone.

-What's going on, Jorge?

-[Jorge] Nothing. You take it easy.

-Okay? Go home.

-[François] Come on!

-Stay where you are. Go!

-Go!

[automated voice] Voicemail.

The call will be charged at the end

[groaning]

[woman] What happened to you?

Ekaterina.

My beautiful Ekaterina,

I think we're really screwed now.

Who did this to you?

[Jorge] No, please.

-[thwacking]

-[groaning]

No more, please.

No more.

Is it true that your cupcakes are drugged?

I won't say anything. I'm not a snitch.

[François chuckles and speaks French]

Oh, no.

[groaning]

All right! Yes!

Yes, it's true! What do you want?

What do you want, a share? Anything.

Our product does not need charity.

Yours is unfair competition.

It's unfair.

And they let me go.

I promised them I wouldn't sell anything,

but if María finds out about this

-Are you sure they were Freddy's people?

-Yes.

Sure, they said they were the competition.

I

I thought Freddy

had forgiven us for Morro, but

Sorry, I don't want to involve you.

I shouldn't tell you anything.

Thank you.

Thank you for listening without judging.

You're the only one

who's done so in a long time.

[Wences] Accept this little shot

just to toast.

[María chuckles] What are we toasting to?

María,

I'm 75 years old,

I won't beat around the bush.

I love you.

And I know you've always loved me.

We've already let too much time pass,

since Eduardo was in your life.

Yes, I know you decided to be faithful.

And I respected that decision.

Even if he was a bit of a slacker.

But he's not here anymore.

And we're not getting any younger.

We have to seize the moment.

That's why

[grunts]

What are you doing?

María Sánchez

will you marry me?

[guitars strumming]

This bride of mine ♪

Will be my torment ♪

[Hans] Xochimilco.

Do they have the crop there?

They don't know, sir.

They couldn't get close enough,

but believe me, we're very close.

It seems they cover

more areas than I thought.

-Which is strange for a new cartel.

-Well

Pecas! Move it, assholes!

Go around the back.

NOBODY MESSES WITH MAMA CAKE

Don't you know how to read, Freddy?

"Nobody messes with Mama Cake."

[tense music playing]

Wences,

don't take this the wrong way.

I love you too,

-but

-But you have to think about it.

No, it's not that.

Look, if you had made

this proposal a few months ago,

I would have immediately said yes,

and even gone

to live with you in the nursing home.

But since Poncho arrived,

I have to take care of him.

He's my responsibility.

I understand.

But I want you to know that I'm willing

to be the best grandfather in the world.

Aw.

[growling]

[yells]

What's going on?

We have to escape the spirits!

[groaning]

What's wrong with that man?

[Wences] I think he ate

the two special cakes.

[Lobo] They tortured him, sir.

After the examination, I can tell you

that Morrito was beaten to death.

His sternum was broken.

[bones cracking]

[man vomiting and coughing]

-[Lobo] Shall I continue?

-[man] Why?

Because it gets more sadistic.

In that condition,

he was electrocuted

until his skin was burnt.

[man gags]

[Lobo] After that, still alive,

he was drowned.

His fingers were broken.

-[fingers cracking]

-[man gags]

And by the scratches on his back,

he was dragged through the streets.

Then they buried him until he rotted.

Anything not broken,

they ended up breaking

by slamming him against the car.

[man coughing and gagging]

Sir, with all due respect,

I've never seen such cruelty.

That Mama Cake

is one of the worst I've ever seen.

[exhales]

Morro wasn't just my employee.

I was fond of him.

He was like a brother,

like a son.

My right arm.

I trusted him completely.

I think it's best

not to mess with Mama Cake.

What?

I think it's best

to eliminate her right now.

If she wants w*r, she'll get w*r.

[gags]

[vomits]

-Where were you?

-[exclaims]

-Well, you guys left me.

-What about my grandma?

Don't be a jealous grandson.

She's a bride.

Some masked guys with weapons

took Jorge away.

-What?

-Well, what?

What's going on?

Everything's weird since I got back.

[laughs nervously] Weird how?

No, don't get the wrong idea.

[hesitates] Jorge

has some money problems.

We thought he'd sorted it out,

but it seems not.

Why is he still working

with my grandma, then?

Don't worry. I'll take care of it.

And don't tell your grandma.

It makes her nervous,

her blood sugar drops and she faints.

Okay.

-But you'll take care of it?

-Yes.

WELCOME

PRETTY MARÍA

You got it, boss. Yes, copy that.

[inaudible]

Get out of the way! Quick! Move!

Get out of the way, b*tch! Move now!

[indistinct chatter and laughter on phone]

The video has gone viral, sir.

My men inform me that Mama Cake

is very crafty, very smart.

There was nothing

they could do to stop her.

Also, it's thought the lady

has connections with the cops.

So she's protected.

Perhaps it is best to leave things alone.

There's a lot of demand.

No need to compete for space.

"A lot of demand"?

"Compete for space"?

You're going to take care of this

personally. Got it?

Yes, boss.

Come on!

All right! That's it!

-Come now.

-Here goes! Straight!

Can you give us a hand, please? Grab that.

Our guide fell asleep. [laughs]

Thanks for everything, Hortelano.

[María] What a wonderful day. [laughs]

Thank you.

-Thank you, honey.

-Thanks, guys.

That was a great idea.

I loved it.

-Come on.

-Coming.

[both panting]

-[door opens]

-[dog barking in distance]

-[Nat] Poncho!

-Nat?

You're the worst.

You haven't stopped ruining my life

since I met you.

When I thought you were k*lling yourself?

No, but I do want to k*ll you.

First, you forgot to mention

that you're a minor.

Then you infiltrated my military base.

You even pulled off the jungle mission

to overshadow me.

-Not at all.

-And since none of that did you any good,

you did the unthinkable,

you drugged me so I'd fail my exam.

Seriously? Drug you?

Poncho, stop pretending!

You put marijuana

in the cookies you gave me.

And you know what? It finally worked. Hmm?

Because I'm out of the military forever.

Hey, I'd never do that.

I swear.

I'm not surprised

you were in reform school, Poncho.

Nat.

[door opens and closes]

[María] Poncho, I'm glad you're here.

I want to tell you

something that happened to me today.

Look what I brought you. Look. Hmm?

Almond-free ice cream. Do you want some?

What's wrong?

[footsteps approaching]

[Ekaterina] Dzherrabai, wound healer.

My ancestors used it

after working hard in cold fields.

And brusnica, the queen of the forests.

The berry of health.

Where did you get all this?

I have my secrets.

[intense music playing]

[sighs] Honestly, I never wanted

to get Natalia into trouble.

But she didn't ask my age,

and I didn't think it was that serious.

And I didn't go to the barracks

to get her suspended,

-and never would I drug her

-Shh.

Not all loves can be lived.

Thanks.

Really, thank you.

For listening and telling me all this.

No one has ever done it before.

No one

No one has ever done what you do for me.

Growing up without a dad

and with an alcoholic mother,

it really wasn't that easy.

Always, since I was little

Well, all my life,

I've felt alone.

Alone,

to the point of wanting to die.

[María whimpers]

Until now.

[kisses]

I love you.

Anyway, that's it.

What did you want to tell me earlier?

Xiadani told me that you were engaged.

Why all the mystery?

I threw him out.

-What? Your boyfriend?

-No.

Your dad.

When he was your age,

I threw him out of where we were living

when I met Eduardo

and things got more serious.

He hated me forever.

I'm to blame for everything he did since.

If you didn't have a father,

it's because he learned it from me.

Times weren't easy for a single woman

with a teenage son.

Alfonso didn't do his part either.

And I had to choose.

And I chose to leave behind

my own son.

I looked for him later, of course, but

I'm sorry.

[sighs]

I'm sorry.

[Jorge moaning]

What the hell is going on here?

Sweetheart, it's not what it looks like.

-Yes, it is.

-[Gloria] Of course it is.

Okay, it is.

-[b*mb exploding]

-[Jorge gasps]

[b*mb exploding]

WE ARE GRATEFUL

FOR THE STELLAR PERFORMANCE FROM

[theme music playing]