Lilies Not for Me (2024)

[bunniefuu]

[gentle music playing]

[birds chirping]

[typewriter clacking]

[engine rumbling]

[paper rustling]

[sniffles]

[sighs]

[bell ringing]

[door shuts closed]



[door creaking, thudding]

Come on then.

[chair scrapes

against the floor]

I'll be just outside.

[door shuts closed]

I thought it might help.

Make it feel real.

[Owen sighs]

[clears throat] Excuse me.

[Owen sniffles]

[Owen sighs]

I don't go on a lot of dates.

[Dorothy chuckles]

How are you today?

Are you asking

the mind wooing you,

or the mind you're here to cure?

Let-- let's just forget

about all of that for now,

and get to know each other.

My name's Dorothy.

But my friends call me Dot.

I'm new to working with patients

like these, like you.

This is my first date

in the ward.

Why don't you tell me

a bit about you?

I've never met a writer before.

Well, please tell me

you write plays.

I was quite taken

with the most recent production.

No, not plays.

-Novels.

-Novels?

I'm busy

with my second, in fact.

Really?

I'd very much like to read it.

It's not on paper yet.

[sighs] They won't allow

my typewriter in here.

Well, the more reason to get

better fast then, isn't it?

How does the story begin?

You really want to know?

[birds chirping]

[exhales deeply]

[engine rumbling]

[indistinct chatter]

[Philip sighs]

Owen.

Philip.

There's this woman there

before us,

and she's a cadaver, mind you,

and she's there

for the very purpose

of our anatomical education,

but this Lord Gregory's so

concerned for being a gentleman,

he can't even

bring himself to touch her.

[both laughing]

-Beg your pardon [indistinct].

-[both laughing]

"Now, see here, fair colleagues,

how the subject's

spinal column descends

into the breastbone area region.

All-knowing entity above,

please forgive

the swelling in my trousers."

Oh, you still are

an insufferable b*stard.

[Philip chuckling]

Okay.

[both grunting in effort]

[both panting]

[both laughing]

-[birds chirping]

-[metallic clacking]

[water splashing]

[bell ringing]

That's all

we have time for, for today.

What a shame.

I'm sure

there's a woman out there

that you're going to make

very happy one day.

And what do you know

about romantic bliss?

I thought I was your first date.

Oh, no, I only--

No need to beat

around the bush, Dottie.

You managed to cure me.

I'm all yours.

[Dorothy chuckles]

[door shuts closed]

[groans]

[door clicks open]

[inhales deeply]

[birds chirping]

[floor creaking]

[metallic clanging]

[door shuts closed]

[breathing deeply]

[Philip] Is this

what life is for you now?

What's that?

Picnicking in the hills,

waxing poetic

about the nature of reality.

-w*nk*ng poetic, more like.

-[Philip chuckles]

My days are usually spent alone,

chain smoking,

staring at a blank page.

Oh, and recently,

procrastinating

with needlepoint,

of all things.

-Needlepoint?

-Mm-hmm.

Busy hands quiet the mind.

[Owen clears throat]

Well, there are worse ways

to spend the life.

In a hospital, for instance?

I was thinking

more along the lines

of a b*ttlefield, but...

a hospital may,

in fact, be worse.

Are you in touch with any

of the other lads from school?

Here and there.

All quite the same, really.

Stodgy pricks with silver spoons

up their arse.

What would they say now?

The miner's son from Yorkshire.

Doctor.

The sensitive Irishman,

celebrated novelist.

Hmm.

An exaggeration, to be sure.

Fine, then.

An old bear who likes

to keep her hands busy.

[both chuckling]

You're quite a different man

to when I saw you last.

I'm quite the same.

You haven't changed a bit.

Out in the windy land

Out in the windy land

I met that swan

I met that swan

[Philip laughs]

[Owen humming]

[both laughing]

[ethereal music playing]

-[indistinct].

-No, seriously.

[both chuckling]

Don't let them come towards me.

-[indistinct].

-[sheep bleating]

I'm getting slow. It's fast!

[waves crashing]

Following. Keep up!

[both laughing]

[indistinct chatter]

[Philip screaming]

[waves rumbling]



[Owen] Oh.

[both laughing]

[Owen breathing heavily]

[bell ringing]

-Good afternoon.

-Good afternoon.

[doors shuts closed]

I'd love to know more

about you, Owen.

Tell me about your childhood,

about growing up.

If you want that story,

you're going to have to go out

and buy my first novel.

An Unfit Soldier.

-I haven't read it or anything.

-Well, I insist that you do.

I hope I won't offend if I ask.

A childhood bout of pneumonia.

My brother fought in the w*r.

May God bless his soul.

If only all good men

were as unfit as I was.

How's the book coming?

Um, rather well, actually.

For an author

without a typewriter.

It's pretty helpful having

someone to tell my story to.

Well, I'm more than happy

to listen.

If it helps you get better.

So you can make

an honest man out of me?

-You should be so lucky.

-[Owen laughs]

So?

[birds chirping]

[tense music playing]

[Owen humming]

[breathing shakily]

[sighing]

[door clicks open]

[Owen humming]

[gentle music playing]

[Philip grunts]

[crickets chirping]

Philip?

Hmm?

Why did you stop writing me?

Doesn't really matter now,

does it?

You wrote me lamenting

how painful it was

being unfit to fight in the w*r

and I was busy

trying to survive it.

Watching men die.

k*lling.

Why did you decide to come here?

I...

needed to...

see you again.

Change made the w*r.

I thought that maybe...

Maybe you were changed

in the way you'd always helped.

Were you?

This is why you've come.

I've always known, Philip.

All those nights back at school.

Control yourself, Owen.

-Who are we resisting for?

-The laws of man.

-Of God.

-Well, no man can judge us here.

We're alone. [chuckles]

And no God would fall to love

he's nurtured for 15 years.

-Science, then.

-God, science.

You can call it

whatever you want.

We are how we are.

We don't have to be.

What's the other option?

Misery?

-Denial?

-Not anymore.

There is finally an alternative.

Owen, that's why I've come.

They've found a cure.

"He glanced at the pages

with disinterest

and promptly reported

an absence of any desire.

The doctor inspecting

his anatomy

confirmed this statement.

Within two weeks, he was

fully recovered physically.

Within a year's time,

he was engaged to be married."

Have you come here

to hurt me, Philip?

I-- I came here

to ask for your help

and to offer mine.

What exactly

do you want me to do?

Perform a simple procedure

and I'll return in kind.

[sighs] What would

the simple procedure entail?

Do you trust me?

That's besides the point.

Whatever you're suggesting

presumably would require

some professional ability.

-I have it.

-I don't.

I-- I can teach you, Owen.

You can learn.

Uh-- [sighs]

If I were to consider this...

wh-- whatever-- whatever it is,

Your-- your proposal...

[Owen sighs]

...first I want to know

what it's like to be together.

Because we wish.

All right.

Then...

when my treatment is successful,

you must accept

my help in return.

I need us both to be well, Owen.

If it's successful,

I'll-- I'll accept your help.

But if it's not, you surrender.

You choose me.

You stay.

[waves crashing]

[both laughing]

[gentle music playing]

[both grunting in effort]

[both panting]

[waves crashing]





[both panting]

[both breathing deeply]

[Owen moans]

[both sighing]

[both panting]

[both moaning]

[birds chirping]

[Owen laughs]

Don't make me laugh

or I'll drop it. [laughs]

[glass clinking]

Oh, bollocks. [chuckles]

-Good morning.

-Good morning.

[Owen groans]

[both laughing]

[gentle music playing]

[leaves rustling]

Would you like a taste

of medical school?

I desire nothing less.

Give us a needle.

All right.

Simple interrupted stitch.

They used to make us

practice on fruit because...

it's surprisingly akin

to human flesh.

Easy.

Mm-mm. Mm.

You're a natural.

Perfect.

[Owen retching]

[door clicks open]

Up.

[Owen panting]

[doctor grunts]

[both sighing]

If the matron

finds out about this,

I have nothing to do with it,

understood?

I'll be back in two hours.

[door shuts closed]

[Owen chuckles]

How did you do?

Thank you.

Are you not hungry?

I couldn't possibly.

Are you ill?

My [indistinct] have made me.

I hope the typewriter

will help you.

I do want you

to get better, Owen.

To be normal.

How's being normal better?

Uh, I want you to be happy

is-- is what I mean.

[birds chirping]

[Owen groaning softly]

Listen to this.

"Lilies."

Lilies not for me.

Flowers of the pure and saintly.

I have seen in holy places...

Where the incense

rises faintly...

And the priest

the chalice raises...

Lilies in the altar vases.

Not for me.

[chuckles]

I'm not one for poetry.

Well,

you're a romantic at heart.

I'm not like you, Owen.

[banging on door]

-Just a moment.

-Who's that?

[banging continues]

[indistinct]

so you hear me, devil c**t.

[glass clinking]

Mr. Green.

Charlie.

Oh, boy.

Oh, boys, I'm finally home.

You tell your mother

to take me back.

I don't want to die alone.

Bessie.

Where are you, you pitiful cow?

[sighs] This has happened

a few times before.

-He used to live here.

-Come out, you wh*re.

Come out! [groans in pain]

-Mr. Green.

-[Mr. Green] Ow!

-You're all right. Just--

-[Mr. Green groans in pain]

-Who are you?

-[Owen] I'm Owen.

-[muffled indistinct chatter]

-[objects clattering]

[dramatic music playing]

[Mr. Green]

Now I got no home at all.

No family.

Abraham dead. Bessie gone.

Charlie off in the city.

Not a soul in the world.

[crickets chirping]

[Mr. Green groaning]

[indistinct].

[Mr. Green laughs]

[Mr. Green sighs deeply]

Good night, my boy.

Good night.

[door creaks closed]

Philip?

Philip?

This is it, Owen. [sniffles]

He's the perfect candidate.

[indistinct].

He has nothing. No one.

-No one will miss him.

-Perfect candidate for what?

For becoming my donor.

What are you talking about?

[Philip breathing heavily]

Everything you need

to know is here.

I'll be awake to talk you

through every step of the way.

Through what?

We are physically ill, Owen.

This desire we feel,

it's not in our minds.

It's in our bodies.

The only path to relief

is to replace the sick parts,

which requires a healthy donor.

You're the only one

that can do this for me, Owen.

You're the only one I trust.

Have you lost your mind?

I will take care of everything.

All you have to do is just...

stay here,

read the instructions,

drink something

to calm your nerves,

and then it's just you and me.

Hey?

This is wrong.

Trust me, darling.

All will be well soon.

[suspenseful music playing]

[door clicks open]

[crickets chirping]

[sighing]

[Mr. Green grunting]

[door shuts closed]

[Philip panting]



[Philip breathing heavily]

Can you feel anything?

Please, Philip.

I don't want to do this.

It's too late for that.

Scalpel is sterilized.



[Owen panting]

[chair scrapes

against the floor]

[Philip panting]

First step,

simple, small incision.

Just like the pictures.

Hold the skin taut,

then light pressure.



Owen.

You can do this.

f*ck-- f*ck.

Well, we can-- we can stop.

We can stop,

it's not too late.

We've got the next step.

[music intensifies]

[Owen muttering]

Next step, next step,

next step...

[grunting]

Right, you can do this.

[grunting, panting]



Owen, just-- No!

Stop.

-Please, stop.

-What do you mean, stop?

-I can't do this, Owen. Please.

-You-- You said you

-wanted to hear the story.

-I do, Owen.

Then you hear all of the story.

You hear all of it.

You don't just get

to hear the bits

that sound harmless

and-- and pretty.

-Owen!

-[banging]

You take all of me,

or you get nothing.

-[grunting effort]

-What did he do?

Nothing. He's just--

He's just tired.

Coward.

[suspenseful music]



[birds chirping]

[light cough]

Water.

-Water.

-Water.

[water tap creaking]

[water flowing]

How do you feel?

Free.

Well done, friend.

[soft orchestration]

[creaking]

[flies buzzing]

[dramatic orchestration]

[grunting efforts]

[panting]

[grunting efforts]

[thudding]



[crows cawing]

[panting]



Rest.

[grunting effort]

[door closing]

[birds chirping]

[rattling]

Ah, breakfast.

[Philip clears throat]

We need to change out

the bandages.

I'll see to it.

I feel perfectly fine, Owen.

We can't risk infection.

[Philip exhales]

It's all going well.

Just a clean and fresh

bandage is all.

I should be fully

recovered soon.

[Owen] Yes.

And we can get to work finding

a donor for you.

That won't be necessary.

Won't be necessary?

We had an agreement.

You got what you wanted, Philip.

What does it matter what I do?

[somber orchestration]

[matron] He's a stubborn

little flower, that one.

-Is he?

-Oh, he's hopeless.

Why do you think we assigned

you to him?



[bell ringing]

I want to know you, Owen.

All of you.



[rain patter]

[knocking on door]

[door opens]

-Evening, sir.

-Evening.

Sorry to bother you.

Might I step in under

the rain, sir?

I promise I'll only be

a moment of your time.

Thank you kindly.

[chuckling]

[door closes]

Just as I remembered.

You missed one.

Who are you?

I'm Charles, sir.

Is there something we can

do for you, Charles?

A little something to warm

my bones would be nice.

If you're in search of shelter,

I'm afraid we're at capacity.

I'm looking for the fella

on the right.

My father.

What makes you think

he might be here?

Thank you.

Uh, I lived here.

As a boy.

My mom, rest her soul,

said my father

would turn up here

time to time.

Drunk out of his tree.

Begging her to take him back.

Now I'm a father myself.

Um...

My wife insists I go

and find him.

Tell him the good news.

Plus we're hoping he could maybe

help with the cost.

[exhales]

Any chance you've seen him?

-Afraid not.

-No, I'm-- I'm terribly sorry.

Would it be a terrible bother if

I took shelter for the night

down the way in that old

stone bothy?

My wife wouldn't be happy if

I slept out in the cold.

Of course.

Are you certain that wouldn't

be a bother?

Positive.

Thank you.

Thank you kindly.

[door opens]

-Good night, then.

-[Owen] Good night.

[door closes]

[tense orchestration]



Excuse me, ma'am.

What is it?

My patient, Mr. James.

Out with it, girl.

I believe he's beginning

to develop feelings for me.

Romantic feelings.

Well, he'd have to start

somewhere now, wouldn't he?

That is my task, isn't it?

Did you just come here

itching for praise?

Or is there something

else you need?

I'd like to be assigned

as his attending.

I believe that more frequent

contact will help

his progress and ready him

for earlier discharge.

Well, you're the expert,

aren't you?

[nurse 1] Did you talk to

Kathy about Sunday?

[nurse 2] I don't know if

I'll be able to make it.

Robert's parents are coming

to visit this weekend.

[chatter continues, faint]

[distant creaking]

[distant water flowing]

[Philip humming]

[scraping]

-Morning.

-Morning.

[door creaking]

Hello!

Thank you kindly.

I'm famished.

Eat with me?

Oh, no, I-- I already ate.

Thank you.

Sit and have a chat

with me, then.

[munching noisily]

[slurping]

It's like eating the sun.

Well, don't burn yourself.

[chuckling]

[pensive orchestration]



[knocking on door]

[tapping on typewriter]

Hello, Owen.

Hi.

How's the book coming?

Uh, very well.

Thank you.

[distant indistinct yelling]

Owen.

[liquid pouring]

In a few minutes,

you'll feel very ill.

Please make sure it

sounds as such.

I'll be back in two hours

for your next injection.

All right?

All right.

[knocking on door]

[wondrous orchestration]

[indistinct chatter]



[fire crackling]

[blowing]

[creaking]

["You for Me, Me for You"

by Alberta Hunter plays]

[Owen] What is that?

[chuckling]

A grizzly bear.

My father taught me.

He used to love going dancing.

-Come.

-No.

-Yes.

-No.

[laughing]

Just, uh... Just do as I do.

Step, step, step.

-Back to back.

-[Dorothy] Okay, no.

No. Start again.

-Ready?

-Mm-hmm.

Bow.

You like me

There's no reason

that we can't agree

Turn.

Then like this.

[chuckling] Nice.

And... back, forward,

back, forward,

and back, and forward...

[Dorothy] Back-- No, with

my legs. Follow my legs.

-[chuckling]

-Left-- Stop laughing.

And back.

And-- how do you expect

me to get better if

you don't act like

a lady, Dottie?

-Come here. Come on.

-[Dorothy laughing]

h*! Step. h*!

-And now... [roaring]

-[Owen laughing]

Come on, once more.

I like you

You like me

Step, step, step...

[both chuckling]

Turn around.

Lean against me.

And back.

Forward.

Back.

Forward.

Back, forward.

You for me, me for you

From now on

I'll take you for me

[music stops abruptly]

[Philip chuckles dryly]

[door opens, closes]

Patient bit the matron.

-Again?

-[Dorothy chuckling]

He didn't break the skin

or anything, but...

Left a bruise.

I owe you an apology.

What for?

Underestimating you.

For hardly knowing a thing

about you.

-Don't be silly.

-No.

There is nothing

more dull than

a friend that

doesn't ask questions.

Why did you become a nurse?

My brother Rory fought

in the w*r.

Rory took after our mother.

Not like me.

People could immediately see

that he was...

His best mate, Declan,

made it out and told me.

Rory wasn't even allowed

to fight with them.

None of the Black men were.

Rory died in an air raid.

Alone in a field.

Laying telephone lines.

I became a nurse because people

aren't meant to die alone.

[bell ringing]

For you.

Turns out you can get

quite a lot

done when your head's not stuck

in a bucket all day.

[Dorothy sniffling]

[Owen] What's your son's name?

Victor.

Vicky, we call him.

And Alice, your wife?

Yes.

Do you love her?

She...

Understands me.

Who I am.

What I need.

Read me something.

[birds chirping]

Lilies.

Lilies not for me.

Flowers of the pure and saintly.

I have seen in holy places.

Where the incense rises faintly.

And the priest the chalice

raises.

Lilies in the altar vases.

Not for me.

Don't stop.

Leave untouched each

garden tree.

Kings and queens.

The flower land.

[soft music]



[light chuckling]

[deep exhales]



[Philip] Hello.

[exhales] You scared me.

How was your day?

Lovely, thank you.

What did you do?

-Today?

-Mhm.

I just went up to the hills.

Did some reading.

-You feeling all right?

-Mm-hmm.

I'm close to fully recovered

actually, maybe a day or so.

Would you like to, uh, take

a look at the wound?

Change out the bandages.

Seems like you've been managing

fairly well on your ow, Phil.

I could use another

pair of eyes.

Don't want it to get infected.

It's time for you to return

to the life that you've chosen.

Leave me to mine.

[quiet sobbing]

[Owen] You've done this before?

I've been with other men,

if that's what you mean.

Men?

Do you really want to know?

Mm-hmm.

There's a pub...

near our flat.

Nightingales.

Place where...

men like us can go.

Seems dangerous.

It's the place I feel safest.

I don't think my father's

going to turn up.

Why do you say that?

Just a feeling.

Besides, I...

should be going soon.

Get back to Vicky...

and Alice.

Your nightingale.

Yeah.

I far prefer it here with you.

I can promise you that.

Then choose this.

Stay here.

With me.

Phillip's gonna be gone soon.

We can live however we please.

You can write.

You can work.

Or no, you don't have to work.

[indistinct]

if you work or not.

[both chuckling]

You wouldn't have to worry

about money.

We could build a life here.

[indistinct]

[indistinct] the rules.

[quiet instrumental]

[nurse] H-help!

Someone!

Help!

He needs a pillow or a blanket

or something.

-Stop right there.

-You need a--

Go! Go!

Oh, I'm here.

I'm here.

You're all right.

You're all right, hey.

Shh. Come on.

Leave him.

-I could just--

-Leave him, I said.

He'll bang his head on the tile.

You're all right.

[tense instrumental]

Nurse Ellis?

I beg your pardon, I--

[typewriter clacking]

[loud bang]

[typewriter dings]

[whistling]

[Phillip] Looking for someone?

He's gone off to market,

I think.

Won't be long.

Owen is my dearest friend

in the world.

You're a very lucky man, sir.

What do you imagine

the authorities

would say about your...

blossoming friendship?

I'm sure I don't know

what you mean.

Life with your wife must be

preferable to imprisonment.

Hard labor.

[chuckling]

Are you threatening me?

[chuckling]

What has Owen told you about me?

You're an old friend.

[Owen] That's all?

I'm in the medical profession,

Charles,

and a group of my colleagues

have developed a cure

for the condition afflicting

you and Owen.

A procedure guaranteed

to eradicate immoral desires

and set you on the path

to becoming a healthy man.

I could help you, Charles.

If you'd like.

I'll help you get back

to your wife and child,

put all of this behind you.

My wife and I

are perfectly happy.

We understand each other.

For now, perhaps,

but a sickness like yours

doesn't lessen with time.

It grows.

What then?

Procedure?

[sheep bleating]

[tense instrumental]

[Phillip] I'll be gone by

the time you wake up.

Owen...

I loved you.

I loved you, too.

[pensive instrumental]

[water splashing]

[typewriter dings]

[typewriter clacking]

[knocking]

Charlie?

Charles?

Where's Dorothy?

Gone. Turn over.

[door creaking]

[Phillip] I cannot stay

to oversee your recovery,

but Owen is a fine nurse.

Congratulations, Charles.

You're free.

[Owen] Charles?

Charles...

[gasping]

Charlie...

what did you do?

[breathing heavily]

[tragic instrumental]



Excuse me.



[indistinct voices]

[baby crying]

[woman murmuring indistinctly]

Can I help you?

Charles was a fine swimmer.

How could he...

You were with him?

[Owen] I was, yes.

You were friends?

He-- he showed up at

my cottage...

looking for his father.

I offered him--

his father used to own it,

and I offered him

accommodation for a few days

to see if he'd show up.

Did he?

[baby crying]

I'm terribly sorry.

[baby crying]

Would you like me to...

Yeah.

[baby crying]

[crying continues]

[knocking]

[indistinct]

Yeah.

Come with me. Up.

Come on, you.

[clock chiming]

Oh, forgive me.

I must depart.

I'll miss the last train.

The-- the clock is broken.

Charlie was going to fix it.

Do you mind if I smoke?

Charlie always wanted to smoke.

I wouldn't let him.

I can't stand the taste.

May I?

Here.

[match flaring]

Did he speak of me?

He said you were

his best friend in the world.

[child babbling]

All right.

All right.

[music playing on phonograph]

[child babbling]

Alice?

Alice?

He wants me to dance.

Charlie and I, we would--

[sobbing] We would dance.

[child giggling]

-[growling]

-[child squealing]

-[growling]

-[Alice laughing]

-[growling]

-[laughing]



[child babbling]



[Alice sobbing]

[soft, pensive instrumental]



[man laughing]

[woman laughing]

[indistinct chatter]

What can I get you, love?

A pint, please.





[indistinct chatter]

[suspenseful soft music]

No, no, no, no.

Let go!

-Let go!

-[thudding]

[alarm blares]

[grunting]

[metal clanks]

[breathing heavily]

[indistinct]

[footsteps departing]

[wind howling]

-[footsteps approaching]

-[door slams]

Phillip?

Why won't you be cured?

I cannot be cured

because I am not ill, Phillip.

[Phillip] You saved my life.

Now I'm...

I'm going to save yours.

[Owen breathes deeply]

[tense music]

[wind whistling]

Is it finished?

I can't find an ending.

The truth is too horrible.

Well, it's a happy ending, then.

[bird chirps]

[celestial soft music]

[waves crashing]

[bird chirps]

-[seagull squawks]

-[waves crashing]

[exhales]