01x15 - The Melodious Mermaid

[bunniefuu]

[Music]

while the black pig took on supplies in

portobello captain pugwash and his crew

took advantage of a well-earned break

what a fine flag of scrumpy this is lil

my rosy cheek little treasure

i must say it's good to be back in the

very mermaid it might be good for you

but i'm sick to death of this place i am

come come lil whatever would we do

without you here i mean you are the

merry mermaid well i'm pulled out of my

head

oh what i wouldn't give for an holiday

oh long time since i had a proper

holiday with buckets and spades oh yes i

would like to make a sand castle

everyone's doing it you know it's all

the wage and there's money to be made

out of holiday makers well i dare say

that's true but

yes

money

oh yeah make a packet out of holiday

bikers for instance people would pay a

fortune to see real pirates like you and

a real pirate ship like the black people

apparently he do not wish to become some

sort of exhibit and they do mind you

losing quiet mr mates here

how's about you let me organize tours of

your supply tours of the black pig get a

nice little brochure together get the

panthers on the ship in and out up and

down a bit of this a bit of that

flogging some fake jewels and souvenirs

and bob's your uncle we're rich

absolutely not mr hook i know your type

you're always in cahoots with cut throat

chick my arch enemy

i wouldn't let you anywhere near my ship

however

come along me hearties back to the black

pig your captain has just had a total

idea

tours of pirate ships that's what i say

like

guided tours like yeah

it's brilliant you know why were you

here numbskull what holidaymakers would

want to set foot on my ship

they don't know what they might get yeah

well i know the flying bassman wouldn't

be a great attraction but hogwash's

would hey

so we have to find a way of capturing

the black pig and opening it up for some

kind of museum

[Music]

do you happen to do any of our tunes

will it just by droning know what i mean

oh

sorry

that's right jake the old mate and we

leave pugwash and his mob marooned on

sharks tooth island

i'd love to know how you propose to do

that

what is the name of neptune is this high

it's a mermaid captain mermaid indeed

you are an odd boy tom looks like a soup

on a rope to me do you may be captain

but you know the old saying

mermaids can only be seen by certain

unusual people like tom here you know

what i mean

you'll stick to making these splendid

black piglets jonah

they'll sit like hotcakes

what a top hole scheme this is so we use

luscious lil disguise disguise disguises

what exactly a mermaid oh you think old

pugwash bleeds in mermaids hey i'd like

that

me

a mermaid

give over wow i'm serious

you want an holiday right right and we

need a mermaid right right so what we do

is dress you up with a tail and that and

sit you on a nice sunny rock change a

scene nice little rest lovely tan right

right

and then we advertise tours here in town

and hundreds of people will come in

boats to have a look at you and we'll

all be in a money and i'll have had a

holiday

right that's right

well i never missed a rook you've got a

few brains after all it seems of course

lil doesn't know this is a plot to trap

pug wash if she knew that she wouldn't

play like ah

now she thinks we're gonna be taking

boat tours round sharks two for island

now we'll need your mum to lend a name

with titan lil up in there can she teach

lil to see my ma i'll have you know as a

voice as sweet as a box of chocolates

right

so all i'm gonna do now is set the trap

pug wash will jump to the bait in a

jiffy you see if you don't and what's

this trap to be

a message in a bottle

a message in a bottle tom hi captain

look we'll read it by

i've got a mouthful help please rescue

me i'm stranded on shark's tooth island

signed a mermaid a bird

lamborghini legends this is gold dust

but captain

how can a mermaid be stranded maybe

maybe she's hurt her tail

look sharply hearties we sail for sharks

tooth island at once and capture the

mermaid just think how much we'll be

able to charge for tours of the black

pig with a mermaid on board

[Music]

one picture you look don't you take a

picture jakey yes mom

we make woman like big fish i don't

understand this i just tore it around

the back you clam

i used to brush your hair like this

oh

now one more little trial allow for me

dearie like this

[Applause]

you secrets

no off you go insane for all your

right

get under that there palm tree and keep

watch

by jill

there she is on that rock the hair top

top

drop anchor over there will you then

we'll take these into the long boat to

the beach

[Music]

what's that terrible noise it's the bird

singing judah we're about to catch a

very sick mummy

oh blimey i sound like a flipping

i'll scare all the holiday boats away i

will

the singing stuff thank heaven for small

messes we'd better wait here until she

starts up again if she's singing she

won't hear us creeping up on her wait a

couple of minutes that's all there's no

time to lose some i just take a look up

here captain check we're alone

what could that be

a real mermaid

[Music]

beneath the palm tree

evil lurks

[Music]

but we can't wait any longer pick up

your lips we're off

[Music]

fish cakes this isn't a mermaid this is

little

tub

trembling trawlers

[Music]

you your getaway this time i'm gonna

turn the black pig into the best holiday

attraction in portobello i am and you

pug wash you are gonna spend the rest of

your days on sharks tooth island

[Music]

you all soft to you

as fast as you can

they'll be free any minute

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

well the heart is i knew it was a trick

all along i've out we did cut through

jake and mr rook yet again and save the

damsel in disgrace there are lots of

girls besides i would like to babysit

really

grateful captain

free fish and chips for all of you in

the merry mermaid

the berry mermaid indeed

jake must take me for a fool

[Music]

as if i'd believe in mermaids

as tom headed the black pig north

northeast from portobello he fancied he

saw a flash of a mermaid's tail

but he said

nothing

[Music]

you