03x02 - Back to Basics; Report Cards

[bunniefuu]

♪ Watch out, 'cause here we come ♪

♪ It's been a while,
but we're back with style ♪

♪ So get set to have some fun ♪

♪ We'll bring you action
and satisfaction ♪

♪ We're the Chipmunks ♪

♪ Alvin, Simon, Theodore ♪

♪ Doo doo, doo-doo-doo-doo ♪

♪ Doo doo, doo-doo-doo-doo ♪

[Miss Smith] Overall,
I'm not totally disappointed

in the results of last week's test.

Some of you had a good day...

Oh, oh! 71?
Yes! I am a genius!

...and some of you
didn't have a good day.

Oh, oh! What?

[bell rings]

M-M-Miss Smith, this...
this just doesn't make sense.

33%? I don't fail tests!

-I beg your pardon?
-Is it possible, you know,

you might have made a mistake here?

No. No, it's not possible.

Well, can I at least
take the test over?

-No.
-Why?

'Cause that's the way
the cookie crumbles!

Miss Smith!
That's such a lame excuse!

-Be reasonable!
-OK, OK.

I suggest you take
a deep breath, Simon.

Take a breath?
Will that change my grade?

-Drop it!
-I can't drop it!

[Alvin]
Suspended? Simon?

Dave's head might...
might actually explode!

Theodore, we gotta film this!

OK, Theodore, move in closer.
There we go, there we go.

Nice, OK.

You're looking at the face
of a young man's fall from grace.

From wunderkind
to just your average,

run-of-the-mill loser!

What are you doing, Alvin?

Oh, I'm documenting your journey
from genius to, you know,

nothing special.

So, just act naturally.
Pretend I'm not here.

Oh, oh! Dave's home! All right!

This is the moment
we've all been waiting for.

Dave! Dave! Simon has something
very important to tell you!

-What is it, Simon?
-I got suspended.

-What?
-Simon got suspended!

Kicked out of school!

Theodore, Theodore,
close up on Dave!

Simon, are you OK?

Wait, wait. Hold it! Cut! Cut!

Let's pick it up from
when Dave gets out of the car.

Dave, get back in the car.
OK, back in the car.

Then, I need you to act naturally.

You're just coming home,
everything's fine.

Forget the camera's on you, then,

when Simon tells you he's become
a delinquent, you freak out!

I don't know
what's happening to me.

It's like my intelligence is
slipping away like... like...

you know, like that stuff that...

Oh, I can't even
make comparisons any more!

Simon, it's OK.
Don't worry about it.

Wait. Hold on.
What is happening?

You put too much pressure
on yourself, Simon.

Why don't you take the next
few days and just relax?

-Wait, wait, wait. What?
-Yeah, relax.

OK, let me... let me try that.
Thanks... thanks, Dave.

Oh! Why can't I figure this out?

[Alvin]
I can't believe you get to relax!

I mean, he didn't even get upset!

-Is this the top or the bottom?
-Simon, Simon,

Dave said relax, OK? So why...

This doesn't make any sense!
Are these pictures in Swedish?

Um, Simon, I know I'm not the genius,

but pretty sure pictures can't
be in a different language.

Simon, you have
to settle something for us.

A rooster in America
and a rooster from Germany

make the exact same noise, right?

No, they don't! American
roosters go c*ck-a-doodle-doo!

But a German rooster
says kikeriki-kikeriki!

-It's not the same noise!
-Of course it is!

-Right? Right, Simon?
-Roosters?

They're the animals
with that dangly neck thing, right?

Is that...?
Or, ooh, is it the...?

-c*ck-a-doodle-doo!
-c*ck-a-doodle-doo!

c*ck-a-doodle-doo!

I need a break!

I can't see!
My vision's all blurry!

-I'm gonna pass out!
-OK, Simon, calm down.

Your glasses are on your forehead.

What's happening to me?
I can't...

I can't think so good.

No!

[Theodore]
Guys, I got this.

[gasps] Uh-oh.

Simon is sailing to Pasadena
to live with baboons and...

...and then he's gonna start
a business selling those...

...those press-on tattoos.

[Alvin]
Oh, that can't be right!

[Eleanor gasps] Shh! He's coming out!

[Alvin]
Quick! Downstairs!

[cries of panic]

-Aaah!
-[Dave] What are you doing, guys?

Oh, us? Well, um,
you know, um, playing...

You know, leap... leapfrog.
See? Um, I hop over Eleanor.

It's called, um...
"Stairs Leapfrog".

Or "Leapfrog on the Stairs".

Oh, I thought you were
just eavesdropping

and then ran down the stairs and fell.

-[chuckling] No!
-No!

Oh, so, well, who goes next?

Uh, that would be me.

So, I leap up and over Theodore.
See?

And... and now, I... uh...
I jump down,

and... and leap.

And... and then...
and then I leap again.

Ugh! Stop it, Theodore.
Dave's playing us.

-So, you were eavesdropping?
-[all] Yeah.

-Pretty much.
-Dave's a sneaky snake.

[Alvin]
OK, Simon, let's... Simon?

[gasps] Look!

"Guys, I've decided
I need some alone time

to unclutter my mind..."

"And find myself again."

"I won't be living
in the house for a while."

"Basically, I'm going back to the basics

and would like you all
to respect my decision."

[gasps] He ran away from home?

Theodore, get the camera!

I know, Alvin. He told me.

-Wait. He told you?
-Yes, Alvin.

-Oh, cut!
-Where'd he go?

He's in the tree
in the back yard.

But I'd like all of you
to leave him alone.

-Is that clear?
-Yeah, yeah, sure, Dave.

No, we'll leave him alone.
Whatever you say.

[whispers] Powwow, upstairs.

Right, it's obvious Simon's not
the only one losing his mind!

Dave is blind to what
we can all see so clearly!

Right! What... what do we
all see so clearly?

-I don't know.
-Guys!

Dave thinks this is a phase
that Simon's going through.

h*, h*! But it's not!
First, he fails his test.

Then he gets suspended.

Then he moves out of the house
and into a tree!

Guys, this is classic, crazy,
genius behaviour.

Simon's dropping out
and he's not coming back!

[gasps] He's not?

Nope. He's going to be one
of those crazy, genius hermits

who never leaves his hideaway!

Little, little legs.
Eight little wiggly legs,

little spider-web legs.
Legs, legs.

Weave your little web,
little silken web, and yet so strong,

-like steel, little web...
-Well, what do we do?

Well, we do the only thing
that loved ones do.

We bring him back from that
dark, lonely, place he's chosen.

[contented sigh]

Aaah! Oof!

What are you doing?
Dave said to leave me alone!

Well, Simon, Dave's not here
right now and we need to talk!

[Dave] Hey, uh,
what are you guys doing?

Just playing... uh, jump rope.

Come on, Theodore.
It's your turn.

Oh, oh, right.

My... mother... told... me

to pick... the very best one...

-and... you... are...
-Well, don't you hold

each end of the rope
and then swing it from side to side?

No, that's the old way, Dave.

Theo, amazing form!

You guys aren't hassling Simon, are you?

How is a little jump rope
hassling Simon?

Good.
'Cause I want him left alone.

Yes, yes, we're gonna...
we left him alone before.

And we'll keep on
leaving him alone!

OK, now, all we have to do
is bait this snare trap

with some stupid text book or some...

Aaah!

[splash]

OK, yeah, well...
well, it works!

Oh, the box trap
works every time!

My pecan pie
is, like, Simon's favourite.

He will totally go for it.

[gasps] Here he comes!

[together]
Oh...

Well, we clearly need
a higher quality trap.

OK, the trap is all set!
Now, we just wait.

[outside]
Aaah!

Yes! We got him!

OK, Simon, we're going
to lift the trap slowly.

Are you out of your minds,
you hooligans?

[screaming]

[Alvin]
Guys, we can't give up!

Every day we leave Simon
alone with his thoughts,

he's going to get
crazier and crazier!

There. Now, they can spy on you

while I get some peace and quiet.

♪ What is the world? ♪

♪ Is it made of people
telling their stories? ♪

♪ What's that do for me? ♪

♪ What happens
when our eyes deceive us? ♪

♪ What's left,
left to believe in? ♪

♪ Oh, if you wanna come down,
if you wanna come down now ♪

♪ Down ♪

♪ Oh,
if you wanna come down, down, ♪

♪ I'll stop the world
from turning you upside down ♪

♪ All work, no play ♪

♪ I'm not the same ♪

♪ I'm not the same one
you once knew ♪

♪ Think I can change ♪

♪ What else remains? ♪

♪ Well, that's up to you ♪

♪ If you wanna come down, down ♪

♪ If you wanna come down now,
down ♪

He shaved his head!

[gasps] It's begun.

Well, he looks happy.

That's not happy! That's crazy!

Simon, Simon, we can do this
the easy way or the hard way!

But don't make us
come up there!

[all]
Aaah!

-[Simon] Relax. I'm OK.
-Where have you been?

I moved to the basement
for some peace and quiet!

-[Dave] What's going on out here?
-[all shout]

Guys! Guys! One at a time!

Oh, OK, OK. See, look.

We were... we were
just trying to help Simon.

Don't worry.
I'm coming back home.

-Yay!
-I just needed alone time

to think about
what's been happening to me.

[Theodore]
So, what's been happening?

I put too much importance
on being perfect all the time.

I just let myself
get too stressed out.

You know, I just had a bad day,
and now I realise

that bad day are just part of life.

You learned all that from
living in a tree for a week?

Alvin, get in the tree.

Dave, Dave,
it's not even necessary.

I... I know the lesson.
I don't need to be perfect.

I'll make mistakes
and that's OK with you.

We're all good with that.
And what was the other part?

Oh, right, right.
I can fail tests and that's cool,

-'cause I just had a bad day.
-[all] Alvin!

[woman's voice]
Alvin...

Alvin!

-Wake up!
-Huh? Huh?

Well, welcome back to reality.
Were you enjoying yourself?

-Oh, I was having so much fun!
-[bell rings]

Oh, and expect
your midterm report cards

to come in over the weekend.

And some of you are going
to be in for a rude awakening!

[Alvin]
That's it. I'm dead.

Dave's gonna see my report card,
know I'm not doing well

and make sure
I never go anywhere ever again!

Or just until you get your grades up.

Oh, like that's ever gonna happen!

And Dave was gonna get me
that new video game.

But now I can kiss that goodbye!

[Simon]
Maybe this is a good thing.

[Theodore] Yeah, and... and maybe Dave
won't even see the report card.

[Simon] No, that's not what I meant,
Theodore.

I meant that once Dave knows

he can help Alvin apply himself...

[Alvin] Not now, Simon.
Theodore's onto something.

-Ha!
-Oh, this is so simple.

Theodore, that's perfect.
All we have to do

is get the report card
before Dave does!

-Wait. What?
-Come on!

[Simon] Alvin? Alvin!
Can we talk about this for a second?

-[Alvin] Wait!
-Aaah!

-What did you give him?
-What?

The report cards!
Did you give them to Dave?

Report card? I don't know
what you're talkin' about!

[Simon] Alvin, stop it.
He doesn't know about that.

Simon, I'm in the middle
of investigating, OK?

This is what I'm trying to get to.

What does he know?
Where did the mail go?

Who got it? OK?
Just... just leave this to me!

All right, look, you don't understand.

I'm a desperate person here.
So, I need you to work with me!

Come on. We have to get inside
without Dave seeing me.

All right,
Simon, I need you to distract...

No. Thank you, Alvin.
Not gonna be a part of it.

Not even remotely interested.

Oh, all right. Theodore,

I need you to distract Dave
while I go through the mail.

-But...
-Theodore,

do I need to remind you
this was your idea?

Now, come on!

I don't remember
this being my idea.

[Alvin]
Shh!

[Theodore] Oh, hi, Dave.
I did not see you there.

-Oh. Oh, hey, Theodore.
-Anyway, what's new with you?

Oh, just working on this song
I have to finish by Monday.

Ha! What a story!

-You OK, Theodore?
-Yeah.

Um... Anyway, uh,
will you come here for a second?

-Where?
-Um, you know,

just... just over here.

OK...

Oh, no, I mean,
more like... over here.

Oh, uh, no, no, sorry.

Actually, will you come with me
to, um... oh, the kitchen?

-What's going on, Theodore?
-What do you mean?

-Nothing's going on!
-Well, I mean, are you hungry?

Yes! Yes, that's it.
Yeah! I'm just hungry.

OK. That makes more sense.

You're not yourself
when you're hungry.

[Theodore]
Yeah, I guess not.

[Theodore]
No! Dave, don't go in there!

-What?
-Oh. Uh, never mind.

I, um...

I just wanted you to help me eat,

but I guess
I can do it by myself.

Oh, OK, well, that's good,
that's good.

-Um... I'll be in here working.
-OK. Sounds good. Bye.

Theodore, Theodore, wake up!
I made a mailbox!

Huh? Wha... What?

I had a brilliant idea.
Now, come on!

Wait. You want me to go in there?

Yes. It's no big deal, OK?

It's just until the mailman comes.

OK, but, um...

So... so, I'm thinking,
why don't I hide in the bushes?

Theodore, OK?
Don't think, all right?

I'm doing the thinking for us.

Now, get inside the mailbox,
and when the mailman comes,

you grab the mail
and you bring it to me!

-How easy it that?
-But...

Theodore, come on now!
This was your idea.

So, come on, I'm gonna be
right here with you.

You know, nearby.

-Well, what will you be doing?
-Me?

Oh! I'm gonna, you know,
be keeping a real lookout,

you know, like, in case, say,

the mailman decided to deliver,
you know, the mail, you know,

-like, to the back door.
-But, why...

-[video game playing]
-Argh! Dang it!

How's it going in there, Theodore?

-[Theodore] My legs hurt!
-OK, all right, well,

just massage your legs a bit,
get the feeling back.

Um, anyway, the mailman normally
comes in the next hour or so.

[Theodore] Then... then why have I been
in here for six hours?

Oh, six hours? Theodore,
you've lost track of time.

[Alvin] It's only been like two hours,
three hours tops.

-Hello?
-Hi.

-Aaah!
-Aaah!

No. No. No. No. Where is it?

-[Brittany] Alvin, who screamed?
-Oh, oh, that was Theodore.

But he's fine.

Alvin's trying to get the report
card before Dave can...

-Don't tell them anything.
-Guys?

OK, OK,
let me tell you everything.

[whispering]
Now... here... report cards...

-Hey, hey, Dave!
-What's going on out here?

And... and why is the mail
scattered all over the place?

Oh, oh, oh, that?

Well, you know, the mailman, poor guy,

he can't seem to figure out
where to put the mail.

So I thought that, you know,
if I built a mailbox,

that might help him, "put it here!"

But, well, as you can see, didn't help.

Wait. I thought I heard
someone scream.

Oh, uh-huh, yeah, well, that...
you know, that was Theodore.

But, um, that's actually... um...

you know, part of... part of a song.

-A song?
-Yeah, yeah.

We're all doing a song and it...
well, it starts with a scream

-to grab your attention.
-Where's Theodore?

[Theodore]
Hey, Dave.

What are you doing
in the mailbox?

Oh, uh, me?

Well... um, I'm, uh...

Oh, oh, well, you know,

we're trying to get that cool,
echo effect, and, uh...

the mailbox gives us that!

Really? How does that work?

Yeah, Alvin.
Uh, how does that work?

Oh, Brittany, come on, remember?

The song starts
with Theodore screaming

and we all start singing
the song, right? Right?

[Theodore]
Yeah! That's... that's right.

-Yeah...
-Yeah, yeah.

-Oh, guys, I'd love to hear it!
-Oh, uh... yeah, no.

It... it's not ready yet.

Well, that's OK.
Just sing what you've got.

Oh, oh, OK... um, yeah.

Take... take it away, Theodore.

Aaah!

♪ Ah-ha! What's that sound? ♪

♪ Waiting for the postman
to come around ♪

♪ Say, ah-ha, what's that sound? ♪

♪ Waiting for the postman
to come around ♪

♪ Say, ah-ha, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

-♪ Everybody say ♪
-♪ Ah-ha, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Ah-ha! What's that sound? ♪

♪ Waiting for the postman
to come around ♪

♪ Ah-ha! What's that sound? ♪

♪ Waiting for the postman
to come around ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, ah ♪

♪ Ah-ha! What's that sound? ♪

♪ Waiting for the postman
to come around ♪

♪ Ah-ha! What's that sound? ♪

♪ Waiting for the postman
to come around ♪

♪ Say, ah-ha, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Ah-ha, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Ah-ha! What's that sound? ♪

Wow, that sounds great!
You know, guys,

I think you might have inspired
something for my own song.

Thank you. So, all right then,
you know, off you go!

Probably want to get back to your writing

-before you forget?
-Right.

-Oh... Thanks, guys.
-Oh, yeah, no problem.

We love being dragged into your schemes.

Ow!

-Oh, be quiet. You're fine!
-I am not! My legs hurt!

You better rest up,
'cause tomorrow's the day.

-The grades will be here!
-But...

but you have a different plan, right?

-Yes, of course.
-How is this different?

Well, this time,
I'm going to camouflage you

so he won't see you and scream.

-What?
-Is it too much to ask

for you to hold still?
It's just face paint!

[Theodore]
Ah! Wait! Stop it! Alvin, no!

I'm not doing this any more!

Theodore, now,
listen to me, OK?

If Dave sees my report card,

I'll be stuck working on my grades!

We won't ever be able to hang out!

You want me to get
that new game, don't you?

-No.
-Please, Theodore, please!

It's just one more day.
You do this, and you're done.

Please!

[Theodore]
OK...

[Alvin] Theodore!

Theodore, get ready!
The mailman is approaching.

Oh, no! He's making a run for it!

Dave! David!

Aaah!

What's the matter?

I've been attacked
for the past three days!

-Oh, that's not true!
-Alvin, what's going on?

Going on?
Nothing, nothing, Dave!

Dave, everything's fine.

[groan from mailbox]

-[Theodore] Ah!
-Theodore! Are you OK?

-Let's just come clean, Alvin.
-What does he mean?

He means,
"Let's, you know, come get clean."

He's got paint
all over his face.

No, Alvin, for real.

All right, all right! I didn't
want you to see my report card!

Alvin, I already saw your report card.

-What? How?
-They're online.

-I saw them on Friday.
-Are you joking?

No. And they're the best
they've ever been.

Oh, Dave, does this mean
I get the new video game?

No, I got you something even better!

Oh, wow.

So now you don't
have to go outside.

Yeah, oh, yeah...
That's... Uh-huh.

-Yeah, thanks, thanks, Dave.
-And it's got a great echo!

-Go on, get inside!
-No, no, that's OK.

Now. Get inside, Alvin.

You'll love it!

-Oh!
-Sing something.

♪ Ooh, ee, ooh, ah, ah,
ping, pang... ♪

♪ Doo doo, doo-doo-doo-doo ♪

♪ Doo doo, doo-doo-doo-doo ♪

♪ Doo doo, doo-doo-doo-doo ♪