01x05 - Like, Where Are Your ba*ls?!

[bunniefuu]

Calm down.

A morning hello is no big deal!

Morning!

I practiced the heck out of it last night!

I got this!

I can't let her catch on
that I'm a morning hello amateur!

Hold on.

Even though we became friends,

would she suddenly start waiting for me
at the school gate?

-She must be waiting for someone else!
-Morning!

The correct answer is to ignore her.

You're late. Let's go.

And that alien was saying
there were only men.

Oh, is that so?

They come here from super far away
on a UFO, right?

That UFO must've been totally musty!

I wonder what they normally eat.
What do you think?

Um, well, uh…

We'll chat again later.

Okay, see ya!

Yes, later…

See ya!

That hurt, damn you!
You're in the way, moron.

Can you hurry up and step aside?
You're so annoying!

This is nothing.

No matter how brutal people may be,
I can forgive them all.

Because I know…

that I now have a wonderful friend!

Over here!

I shall forgive them.

No good. Totes zoned out.

She's def acting weird!

I was wondering why she didn't return
my messages. She said she lost her phone.

And she wasn't at school yesterday.

Hey! Maybe she went to see
that ex-boyfriend?

Wow, for real?

And he rejected her flat-out
so she stopped caring about stuff

and broke her phone?

That's so possible.

Here it comes! Agony time!

It's when she remembers the past
and writhes about.

I wanna talk about aliens.

CRAB + TURBO G
SPIRITUAL PHENOMENON? FRESHWATER CRAB?

I want to talk to Miss Ayase!

I want to talk about ghosts!

I was at my wit's end in the morning,
and couldn't talk at all.

Miss Ayase asked me
all sorts of questions, too!

I want to talk to Okarun!

What do the aliens
that assaulted us usually eat?

And do they even wear underwear?

You idiot, Ken! You moron!

I want to talk to Okarun!

I must hurry and recover our relationship,
or she'll hate me!

I wanna talk, I wanna talk to him!

WHAT DO THEY USUALLY EAT?

Huh? Who?

Okarun! It's Okarun!

Tell us his name. Real name.

I can't possibly say his name!

Bring me the boy with glasses
who likes the occult!

Was anyone interested in the occult?

It's lunchtime,
so maybe he's at the cafeteria?

Um, excuse me.

Is Miss Ayase here?

Huh? Who? I can't hear you.

Maybe she's at the cafeteria.

Like Okarun would go
to such a rowdy place!

He's at the co-op. The co-op!

Co-op?

I'll drop by after I check the cafeteria.

TSUKEMEN

She's not here. I should try the co-op.

I guess I'll try the cafeteria.

TSUKEMEN

Nowhere to be found.

She's avoiding me.

She realized this morning how boring I am

and must've thought
that I'm a pain in the butt.

Sheesh, where are you, Okarun?

Lunch break is gonna be over soon!

This is the worst.

Come to think,
he was pretty lifeless this morning.

Maybe he doesn't like people
getting in his face?

Maybe I wasn't earnestly thinking
about Okarun's feelings.

Miss Ayase has so many friends,
so I guess I'm just a friend candidate.

Maybe he's avoiding me.

Maybe I don't even count as a friend.

I'm totes feelin' the blues.

I was conceited.

Why am I such a wimp?

Why am I always like this?

I'm sorry, Miss Ayase.

I'm sorry, Okarun.

Ouch!

I found you, Okarun!

Miss Ayase!

What are you doing there?

That's my line!

Ouch! Like, I heard teeth clashing!

I was searching for you
the whole time, Miss Ayase!

And that's my line!
Don't be wandering around so much!

Were you looking for me?

I was! And break is almost over!

I'd thought that you were completely
avoiding me, Miss Ayase.

That's what I was thinking!

Huh? This is turning really awkward.

I have to change the topic fast!

They were kissing just now!

Hold on, Momo.
You totes shoulda told us sooner!

So that's why you've been acting so weird.

No way! I'd never kiss a dimwit like him!

That's right! I'd never do that
with a stupid person like her!

Hold on just a second!

You don't got the right
to reject, you baldie!

I'm not bald! Can you even see properly?!

How lame! A serious answer!
You're so lame, damn four-eyes!

Okay!

You just antagonized every single person
wearing glasses in the world!

I don't want to talk to you, okay?
Don't talk to me!

You said it!
You better not talk to me, okay?

Wicked.

Those two really get along!

I couldn't help retort to her provoking.

There are so many things
I want to talk to her about.

I have to properly apologize.

Huh?

No way.

Momo! I heard you were kissing
in the courtyard?

What kinda guy is he? Which class?

I said, it's nothing like that!

Actually, he's an otaku,
and a total four-eyes.

-Don't you run off with the story!
-Miss Ayase!

There he is! That's the bae!

I said…

he's not my…

Wait, what the hell are you doing?

Miss Ayase, I have to talk to you!

Oh, one of those.

That's unexpected.

Miss Ayase, there's a major issue!

Why are you here?

I said I didn't wanna talk to you!

Shoo! Shoo!

This isn't the time for all that!

It's something important!

I need to talk to you alone!

Please, listen to me!

As if!

We start off with a bloodbath?
I pity your bae!

As. I. Said.
He's not a boyfriend or anything!

Don't spread strange rumors!

Miss Ayase! You talked a whole bunch
to me this morning!

Why won't you talk to me at all now?!

You said you didn't want
to talk to me, too!

I was just provoked,
so it was just a retort.

To be honest, I just wanted to talk to you
more than anything, Miss Ayase!

Quite the words!

-Go for it, Otaku-kun!
-Shut up!

When I say I don't want to,
I don't want to! Go away!

Wow, how cold. That's so brutal.

You guys are the brutal ones!

So is it that embarrassing
to be friendly to me?

You don't have to go all-out
to reject him, you know?

If he's just a friend, you'd let it slide
with a wisecrack like you always do.

This isn't like you.

I wonder if Miss Ayase already went home.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry! Are you all right?

Huh? Oh, no, are you okay?

I have a water bottle in my bag.
I hope it didn't hurt?

Oh no, not at all.
Maybe it's because I've been working out?

I'm so sorry.

That was totally my fault!

P-Please don't worry about it.

You're a very kind person.

Man, I feel so bummed.

It feels like I'm the bad guy.

No, I was the one at fault.

What the hell?

Didn't he say he had no friends?

And she's kinda cute, too.

Hey, did you see that?

That otaku had such
a dumb look on his face.

He totally fell for me back there.

He must be head over heels for me by now.

You're such a player.

What? I mean, it's so fun
when scum fall for you!

I'm sure a guy like that never had
a decent conversation with a girl, anyway.

And he probably will never be touched
by a cute girl like me ever again.

I'm letting him dream,
so isn't that a good thing?

I'm sure that four-eyed otaku
is happy now, too.

-Aira!
-You okay?

But wait, why a washtub?

That fell from directly above us,
didn't it?

Huh? That girl from earlier has fallen!

Did the impact of bumping into me
have a delayed effect?

M-Miss Ayase?

Okarun! Let's go home together!

Oh, you're really looking sharp
as usual with those glasses!

I guess stupid girls will never
understand your charm, Okarun.

Some are more fit to have washtubs

falling on their heads
than guys falling for them.

I'm sorry, Okarun.

I had the worst attitude towards you.

In the courtyard, after that incident
that was like a kiss, I got all flustered.

I'm sorry I was so embarrassed.

I'm not embarrassed about
being friendly to you, Okarun.

No, it's fine! I don't mind at all.

More like, I'm very happy that
I could make amends with you.

Any…

Anyway that's trivial.
I have a huge problem!

Huh? Wait, what do you mean trivial?

I was agonizing a lot about this!

Please calm down and listen.

You know how we defeated
Turbo Granny, right?

We did beat her.

We even visited a shrine afterwards.

Your curse is gone,
and your thing is back too, right?

They're gone.

What are?

-ba*ls.
-Huh?

My ba*ls are gone.

That's why I told you to show me.

To begin with, why didn't you notice?
Those are your ba*ls!

Miss Ayase, you're laughing too hard!

Well, the shaft was back, so I felt
reassured and didn't notice the ba*ls.

Shaft? Stop making it sound
like it's something glorious!

Yours is nothing more than a pencil!

You've never seen it!

No choice. Gotta take a peek.

What? You're going to look?

I ain't gonna look at your wiener!

I'm gonna peek into your soul.

Momo! Bring me a doll, I don't care what!

Also, bring a washing bin and some water.

There's something hiding inside him.

All right, let's begin.

You put the talisman on the doll?

You…

dumb-dumb!

Huh? What is this? Huh?!

Don't move. Don't talk.
You rotten tangerine.

Wait a minute!

Are you completely
fooling around right now?

The lines in the kanji for "person"
support each other!

Okay! You are fooling around!

Besides, Kinpachi-sensei
would never say "rotten tangerine"!

Momo, did you get a glimpse of anything?

I did.

Right when Okarun got smacked,
the aura changed for an instant.

All right, Momo. Help me out.

The instant the aura changes colors,
pull out that aura.

You can pull out a human aura?

It won't be his.

If it's something foreign,
you should be able to pull it out.

Here goes.

Concentrate, okay?

Okay.

What?

I felt it just now!

Once I pulled it out, it disappeared!

Crap, Grandma! I might've let it escape!

Calm down.

PEACEFUL PROSPEROUS FAMILY
WARD AGAINST EVIL AND MISFORTUNE

Wait up, damn it!

It went that way! Come on, catch it!

So fast! Seriously, what is that thing?

Where did you go, rotten tangerine?

I know!

Where is that cat?

There you are!

Caught it!

It's probably here!

Let go of me, scummy old hag!

I'll k*ll all three of ya!

That's amazing, Miss Ayase!

Your psychic powers have evolved!

Yeah! How's that?

-Come at me!
-So, who is this?

-Come on, come on!
-Dunno.

Well that's surprising.

What is this?

It's Turbo Granny.

But we defeated Turbo Granny!
She went to the afterlife, right?

Who'd be defeated
by some youngins like you?

Don't underestimate the elderly!

Doesn't she look kind of cute?

I just told you
to not underestimate me, punk!

In that instant I was getting burnt
by the barrier spell,

I switched to astral form
as if I was swimming in the flames,

and possessed the boy's body.

As I was close to being diminished,

I was able to completely sever
my presence within his body.

I was hiding inside him as I waited
for my spiritual powers to recover.

I'd been thinking, when the time comes,
that I'll k*ll both of you.

You're still gonna go at it?
You've already lost.

I haven't lost!
There's no way I'd lose, idiot!

Especially you!
You're not getting away with this.

I'll snap all your bones!

Do you understand your current situation?

We're the ones with the advantage here.

You told us too much
about what's on your mind.

That's right! Hand the ba*ls over!
Gimme my ba*ls!

You have nowhere to run anymore!

You shouldn't be thinking
about defeating me.

If I die, your ba*ls
will never go back to normal.

You morons finally understand
the situation now?

I'm the only one
with the advantage here, you b*stards!

So for now, boy, bring a kitchen knife.

And k*ll these two b*tches.

If you do,
I'll give your ba*ls back to you!

Damn you!

Do it!

You have no choice but to obey me!

Hurry up and do it!

Stuff like that is too much stress.
Makes me wilt.

Huh? Why? We drove Turbo Granny out,
so why can you transform?

Impossible! What's going on?!

This paper fan is used to drive
evil spirits outta people's bodies.

You seem to have been
trying really hard to cling on,

because it looks like only
Granny's consciousness came out.

Which means, your spiritual power
is still remaining inside the kid,

and just the consciousness
was transferred into the doll.

By the way,

I'm the only one who can return
the consciousness to its original place.

But didn't you face Kinpachi here
and call me an idiot?

You dumb-dumb cat-turd rotten tangerine.

I'm sorry, Sensei!

I'm not your Sensei, you fool!

Oh, you really are cool Seiko-chan!

The hell you think you're doing?

You're back!

That was amazing! How did you transform?

-Well, I don't know.
-Scurry.

I got really pissed

and felt I just couldn't forgive her,
and I had transformed.

You dumb-dumb! You rotten tangerine!

That's enough. Cut it out.

You're really petty, but to be honest,
I can't really hate you.

The feeling of sympathy for those girls
is the same, after all.

So let's be a bit friendly here.

If you give the ba*ls back,
we'll return you your powers. Okay?

Okay?

Damn punks.

Fine.

All right, it's settled!

Now hurry up and give the ba*ls back!

They're not here.

Hey! You promised.

-Hurry up and--
-I don't lie.

His ba*ls? I dropped them somewhere.

-Oh, no.
-Danger.

What's dangerous?

Humans are creatures that just
accidentally mutter "danger" sometimes.

I totally get that.

Next episode,
"A Dangerous Woman Arrives."

And I'm asking you, what's so dangerous?