01x04 - Parasitic Pal/It's No Picnic

[bunniefuu]

- Attention, campers!
Attention, campers!

It's time for "camp lazlo!"

- ♪ There were two scouts
who made a friend ♪

♪ And lazlo was his name-o ♪

♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- And lazlo was his name-o ♪

- ♪ And then that trio
went to camp and turned
it upside down-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

♪ And lazlo was his name-o ♪

- [Yodeling]


Turner entertainment group

- [Humming]

Good morning!

[Whistles]

- What the--

- Hey, guys!

- Aah!

- Morning, raj, clam.

Happy peculiar greeting day.

- Happy what?

- Peculiar greeting day.

Samson was
particularly impressive.

He made himself throw up.

- Throw up?

That is
a very peculiar greeting.

Um, are you sure it was
for peculiar greeting day?

- Well, raj, I can't imagine
why else he would vomit.

You all right, raj?

- Ooh! What is that?

- What's what, raj?

- Th-th-th-that!

- What? What is it? Where?

- Right there! Right there!

- Wow!

What's that?

Hey, raj,
did you see this? Raj?

Raj?

- Y-yes, lazlo, we saw it.

- Well, what do you think
it is?

- Um...

- [Both whisper]

- Sure is making a funny noise.
Do you think that's ok?

- 1, 2, 3!

- Paper covers rock. I win.

- Dang!

Um, clam and I agree

That I should walk you
over to the camp nurse.

Now, lazlo, you just sit here
and wait for nurse leslie.

- Lazlo?

- Um, right here.

- The nurse will be
right with you.

Lazlo?

- Right here.

My best friend raj wants me
to have this looked at.

You know, just to make sure
I'm ok.

- Uh-huh.

Could you, uh...

- So, um, am I ok?

- I don't know.

You look fine to me.

- Thanks so much,
nurse leslie.

Raj is gonna be so relieved.

- Is he the primary member?

- Um, ok.

- And your friend's name?

- Raj.

- No, I mean
your friend there.

- Oh, him?

Well, gee,
I don't know, um...

What about...

Lamar?

Do you like that name,
little buddy?

- [Alarm yodels]

- Good morning, lamar.

Hee hee!

Lamar, stop that.
That tickles.

Hee hee!

Ok, lamar,
time for calisthenics.

And a-one! Keep up, lamar.

And a-two! Good, lamar.

And a-three!

Whew.

Ok, lamar,
let's hit the showers.

- Lamar?
- Lamar?

- ♪ Everyone loves
my little buddy wuddy ♪

♪ He's my cuddly pal ♪

♪ Hoobely hoob
and a-zingely zee ♪

♪ He's sucking on my head ♪

♪ He's so cute ♪

♪ So slimy and so squeaky ♪

♪ Hoobely hoob
and a-zingely zee ♪

♪ Who cares if
he smells kooky? ♪

♪ Friends like to see
my little buddy wuddy ♪

♪ Hanging oh, so mellow ♪

♪ Hoobely hoob
and a-zingely zee ♪

♪ Like a heap
of jiggly jell-o ♪

♪ He's so cute ♪

♪ He should have a show
on cable ♪

♪ I've got a hunch
when we munch on lunch ♪

♪ They'll all want to sit
at our table ♪

- Look, lamar!
It's buddy day.

Let's go!

♪ He's my buddy wuddy ♪

♪ Boogely woogely buddy ♪

- Come on, lamar! Egg toss!

Ooh! Ping-pong!

♪ Hoobely hoob
and a-zingely zee ♪

♪ He's sucking on my head ♪

- Oh, boy! A root beer float
eating contest!

♪ Hoobely hoob
and a-zingely zee ♪

♪ He's my buddy wuddy ♪

- Someone has got to pull
that thing off of lazlo.

This friendship
is grossing me out.

- Oh, boy!
Team teeter totter.

Come on, buddy.

- Ooh! Whoa, not so fast.

- Up, down. Up, down.

I'm feeling sick.

- Lazlo, I think that thing
is getting bigger.

- Yeah? He is getting
a little harder to lug around.

- And you're looking a bit pale,
too, lazlo.

Lazlo, maybe lamar
wants to go home.

- I can't let him go, raj.

We're like siamese twins.

I--i--i love him!

Besides, we entered
the big buddy day swim finale.

Can't miss that.

- Ok, on 3,
I rip the leech off,

Pass it to you guys,

You take it to the lake.
Got it?

- Uh...

- 1...2...3!

Hi-yah!

Hi-yah! Hi-yah! Hi-yah!
Hi-yah! Hi-yah! Hi-yah!

Get off, you parasite!

[Shouting]

- Did it come off?

- What?

- The leech.

- Oh. Hmm...

- Raj, why can't anyone
see that lamar and I
belong together?

- He doesn't belong here.

He belongs in leakey lake.

- Lamar...

- Attention, campers!
Attention, campers!


The big buddy day swim finale.

So grab your buddy,
and have a...good race.

Yeah.

[Hums]

- [Babbling]

Got to get to the lake.

Big race.

Slinkman, who is that scout?

- Um, lazlo, sir.

- No, no, the fat one.

- Oh, that's a leech, sir,

A sea lamprey, actually.

- Hmm. A sea lamprey.

Well, see that mr. Lamprey
gets a uniform, will you?

- Yes, sir.

- Maybe raj was right, lamar.

Maybe you do need
to go home.

May...be...

You...need to go home...

♪ No place like home ♪

♪ Home ♪

[Singing gibberish]

♪ To go home ♪

- You're looking a bit pale,
too, lazlo.

Maybe you need your blood.

- We're like siamese twins...

Siamese twins...

You need to go home, lamar.

Home.

Home.

♪ Way down upon the swanee-- ♪

Aah!

Ow! Ow! Ow!

Aah!

Going fast! Going very fast!

Ouch! Ow! Ah! Ooh! Ah!

- I can't see a gosh-darn thing
out of these goggles.

- Aah!

- Can you see anything, chip?

- Do you imbeciles really need
to be wearing your goggles

Before you get in the water?

- I don't know,
but I have my floaties!

- Aah!

Watch out!

- What in the--

- Aah!
- Aah!

Monkey and sea lamprey!
Monkey and sea lamprey!

Split up!

- Run for your lives!

- Little red wagon
is out of control!

- [Lazlo screaming]

Excuse me! Pardon me!
So sorry!

Raj!

- Lazlo?

- [Crowd screaming]

- Swimmers, take your mark.

Get set...

- Wait!

Run for your lives!

Monkey and sea lamprey!

Monkey and sea lamprey!

- Nobody panic!
Parasite on a wagon!
Parasite on a wagon!

- Lamar? Lamar?

Lamar? Lamar!

Where are you? Lamar!

Lamar!

- Sorry about your leech, lazlo.

- He was my...

Friend.

- Yeah, but he was
pretty gross.

- You know, lazlo,

Somehow I feel
that a little bit of lamar

Will live on in all of us.

See you later, lazlo.

- Yeah, see you, lazlo.

Ugh! That thing was so sick.

I can't imagine having
one of those stuck to me.

- Babies!

Lamar was a mommy!

Lamar wasn't a lamar.
She was a lauren!

And she was a mommy!

Ok, kids, time for dinner!

Good! You guys
are such good eaters.

Look at that appetite.

You'll be on solids
in no time.

- Hey, lazlo,
do little leeches need burping?

Because if babies
don't get burped,

It comes out somewhere else.

- Oh, boy. I just think
it was generous of lamar--

I mean, lauren--to leave us
with so many kids.

- Yeah. How many babies
do you think she had?

- Hmm...
That's a good question.


- Attention, campers!
Attention, campers!

It's time for "camp lazlo!"

- ♪ There were two scouts
who made a friend ♪

♪ And lazlo was his name-o ♪

♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- And lazlo was his name-o ♪

- ♪ And then that trio
went to camp and turned
it upside down-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

- ♪ L-a-z-l-o ♪

♪ And lazlo was his name-o ♪

- [Yodeling]

- Dear mom and pop,

It's been a wee bit wet
here at camp kidney lately,

But us bean scouts
don't mind at all.

We love the rain.

In fact, there's only one thing
that bean scouts love

More than spring rain showers.

Mud puddle!

- Lazlo, can't we skip the mud
this time?

- Wet mud! Wet mud!

- We are not alone.

- What are you doing here?

Well?

- Well, what?

- Well, what, nothing.

Everybody knows
that the squirrel scouts

Have exclusive rights
to the mud puddle.

- Yeah!

- Of course you do.

To that one over there.

- Oh, no, that would be
your mud puddle over there.

So I suggest you take
full advantage.

- Oh, no, please, after you.

- Ok, fine.

Patsy!

[Echoes]

[Drums beating]

- [Whooping]

- [Whoops]

[Whoops]

- Hi, lazlo.

Did you cut your hair?

- Uh, hi, patsy. No.

- What are you doing
in our mud puddle?

- Don't you mean
"our" mud puddle?

- Our mud puddle.

- Our mud puddle!

- Our mud puddle!

- Our mud puddle!

- Our mud puddle!

- Oh, good, slinkman.
It stopped raining.

I don't want to be too soggy

When I pop the question
to miss doe.

- Yes, sir, very good, sir.

- Ahh. I can see
the two of us.

Enjoying a picnic together.

She's having a salt lick
on a cr*cker.

- Ok!

So, who wants to learn
"cat's cradle?"

- I do, miss doe.

- Man a mellon ball, squirrels!

- Hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!

- Ready...aim...

Fire!

- Um, incoming, sir.

- Very good, almandine.

Now try it without
using your toes.

- Uh...uh...

- Oh, why, hello there,
scoutmaster lompus.

- Uh, that's lumpus.

- Kids, give
a big squirrel-scout squeak

To scoutmaster lompus.

- Hello, scoutmaster lompus.

- Right.

Um, anyway,

Miss doe,
I would like to inquire

If you might consider
accompanying me for a picnic.

- A picnic?

Oh, mr. Lompus...

What a wonderful idea!

Did you hear that, squirrels?

Mr. Lompus wants to bring
the bean scouts

Over for a picnic
with the squirrel scouts.

We'll have fun
and food and games.

Oh, won't that be great,
mr. Lompus?

- Yes, that would be great.

- But that's our mud puddle.

- We can't let
the squirrel scouts
take our mud puddle.

- Yeah. Where am I going to do
my synchronized swimming?

- Um, the picnic, sir?

- Oh, right.

- Uh, thank you all
for coming.

We're having a picnic
with the squirrel scouts today.

- Ahem.

- Oh, right.

There'll be fun,
food, and games,

So put on your party face.

- Games!

- What games do we have to play
with the squirrel scouts?

Duh...

- We'll probably have to
outbake them or something.

- [Everyone laughing]

- What is it?

- It's a note
from the squirrel scouts.

- What's it say?

- It says they want
to settle the mud puddle
argument with a--a--

- With a what?

- With a pinecone-sitting
competition.

- [All gasp]

- Not the pinecone sitting!

- My rumpus hasn't recovered
since the last one we had.

- We have to give up
the mud puddle.

It's hindside suicide.

- You know what?
We must do it, beans.

- What?

- Did napoleon give up the moon
to the swiss?

Don't you think he
would have gladly planted
himself on a pinecone

To save the moon base from
falling to the barbarians?

- Lazlo! Lazlo! Lazlo! Lazlo!

- Lazlo! Lazlo! Lazlo!

- Fire!

- I-is this thing on?

H-hello!

Um, c-can you hear me
at the back?

- Hey, girls,

I didn't know we were
having melon for dinner.

- I don't feel very welcome
here, lazlo.

- I'm getting hungry, girls.
Let's eat.

- Don't touch the monkey.
He's mine.

- Ahem. Okey-dokey.

Now, before we begin,

I think that we should
put our paws together

For scoutmaster lompus

For his help making
all of this possible.

- Um, it's lumpus, miss doe.

- Grr!

- Ok, squirrel scouts,

Let's welcome our guests

With our squirrel scout
salutation.

- Yeah, girls, let's give them
our squirrel scout salutation.

- Um, bean scouts--
no, no, squirrels!

- That's enough!

We all know why we're here.

- Well, that's not so bad.

- There's no pain in pinecones.
There's no pain in pinecones.

There's no pain in pinecones.

- We all know the rules
of pinecone sitting.

The last behind
on the pinecone wins,

And their side gets to play
in the mud puddle

Like the little piggies
they are.

- What is she talking about?

- Ready...

Get set...

- [Groaning, yelping]

- Ooh, that is a tender area.

- Up, up, up, up, up, up.

- Up, up, up, up, up, up.

- Up, up, up, up, up.

Up, up, up, up, up, up, up.

Up, up, up, up, up, up, up.

Up, up, up, up...

I--i can't make it, lazlo.

Go on without me!

- Yeoww!

- Look! Lazlo is still
on the pinecone.

- Wow, look at him.

Just like napoleon.

- Duh.

- Go, lazlo!

- Lazlo! Lazlo! Lazlo! Lazlo!

- [Bean scouts chanting]

- Did you do something
to your hair, lazlo?

- [Chanting continues]

- Oh, my! It's too exciting!

- Don't touch the monkey.
He's mine.

- [Cheering]

- Aw, man!
- That's not fair!

- She was using love!
- They were cheating!

- You ok, lazlo?

- Yeah, sure, patsy. Fine.

- Need a hand getting up?

- No, thanks.

- All righty, then.

I'll catch you later.

- That is one weird mongoose.

- Hey! The mud puddle!

It's all dried up now!

- Ohh!

- Now what are we gonna do?

- Tree.

- Hey! That's our tree.

- That's our tree.

- Our tree!

- Our tree!

- Yoo hoo!

Mis doe?

Is that you?

Uh-oh.

[Groans]