01x44 - 'Tis the Seasoning/Winter Blunderland

[bunniefuu]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ Going down the rabbit hole

♪ Where we're going
no one knows

♪ Obstacles 'round every bend

♪ Let's see where
the tunnel ends ♪

BUGS: Got to finish
up my holiday shopping.

Hello, holiday shopper.

I'm Porky, your gree, gree...

[STAMMERS] I'm here to say hi.

Well, hello, doc.

Could you kindly direct
me to where I can find
the Easy Cook Acorn?

Wow, everyone's been
asking for that toy.

It's over at the...
[STAMMERING]

[STAMMERING] Merry, um...
Happy holidays!

Here it is.

What do you know,
I got the last one.

Squeaks will never eat
a raw acorn again.

Not so fast, rabbit!

This here's the last one.

I'm a gonna sell it online
at 100 times the price.

[LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY]

PORKY: [OVER LOUDSPEAKER]
Clean up on aisle nine...
[STAMMERING]

Never mind, I'll do it.

I've always been conflicted
that we sell these.

Yee-haw!

I'm a gonna be rich!

What in tarnation?

Happy holidays, bub.

Why's this stuff so sticky?

It's eggnog.

[STAMMERS] Mostly eggs.

Eggs aren't sticky.

Yeah, but...
[STAMMERING] That's all yolks!

-[LAUGHS]
-[GROANING]

Rabbit!

That guy's got
a Scrooge loose.

[LAUGHS]

- Huh?
- SAM: [LAUGHING]

[CRASHING]

[CHEERING]

Huh? Hey!

[LAUGHING]

[SCREAMS]

Uh-oh!
[SCREAMS]

Come out, come out,
wherever you are.

Huh.

Where'd that furry vermin go?

BUGS: Eh, right here, doc!

[GRUNTING]

[GROANING]

BUGS: Yoo-hoo!

Over here, Sam.

Eh, what's up, doc?

[GRUNTING]

-What's up, doc?
-[GRUNTING]

- What's up, doc?
-[THUDDING]

- What's up, doc?
-[THUDDING]

- Oh, doc.
-[THUDDING]

[GIGGLING]

You know, they say
the camera adds 10 pounds.

But in Sam's case,
they all went to his head.

[LAUGHING]

Oh, it looks
good on you, though.

- Bye!
-[GRUNTS]

[WESTERN INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

Huh? Oh!

Santa Claus!

I'll ask him for an
Easy Cook Acorn.

- Out of my way!
I wanna see Santa.
-[PEOPLE GROANING]

It's my turn.
All right, Santy.

I wanna tell you what I want.

-[KID SCREAMS]
- Give me a train set,

a pony, some TNT,
and an Easy Cook Acorn.

You know,
they're the hot toy this year.

[MIMICS SANTA]
h*, h*, h*!

Tell me little boy,
have you been naughty
or nice this year?

Er...
Uh...

Nice?

Oh, you don't sound so sure.

Now, let's just have
a look-see, shall we?

Ah, let me see here.

"Yellow Pelly, Yells-a-lot,
Yokididy, Yosemite Sam."

There you are.
[TUTTING]

No, looks like you've been
a naughty little boy
this year.

[c*ck g*n]

If you don't give me
my presents right now,

the halls won't be
the only thing
I'll be decking.

All right, doc. You win.

Your presents are over there.

Yippee!

Happy holidays!
Happy holidays to me!

[BANJO PLAYING]

All right, my train set,
my pony, my TN...

[TNT EXPLODING]

I need a place to hide.

Oh!

[GROANING]

Where'd that rodent get to?

-[PANTING]
- Easy Cook Acorn, huh?

They'll never take me alive.

Cover me!

Eh, next year I'm doing
all my shopping online.

SAM: Nice try, rabbit!

Like taking candy
from a bunny.

PORKY: [STAMMERING]
Potato pancakes!

[STAMMERS] Step right up,
and catch your potato latkes.

Don't mind if I do.

Oh, you're gonna need
a clean-up on aisle...

I'm on it.

[LAUGHS]

[GRUNTS]

-[SCREAMS]
-[THUDDING]

- What the...
-[GROANING]

Huh?

Oh, for the love of pearl!
My Easy Cook Acorn.

[GRUNTING]

Oh, brother. This guy's been
stalking me all day.

It's time to sock it to him.

[BOTH SCREAMING]

SAM: [GRUNTS]

I really gave him the boot.

[GRUNTS] What the...

Huh?

Well, I think that's a wrap.

-[SCREAMS]
-[THUD]

Phew! That was tough,
but worth it.

I got the very last
Easy Cook Acorn...

I say, I say I got 5,000
Easy Cook Acorns here.

The, I say, these things
are hotter than jalapenos
in a hot tub, son.

I say,
where do you want them?

Right over by the...
[STAMMERING] Just drop
them off at the loading dock.

[UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC]

-[BELLS JINGLING]
-[GASPS]

Yeah!

Hey.

You're not
a Tickle-me-barbarian.

My guess is you were
naughty this year.

[SQUEAKING]

You finished
your letter to Santa, huh?

[SQUEAKING]

You saw Santa,
here in the forest?

[SQUEAKING]

Come, Krakos. We have
much to steal and pillage.

Like this boulder.

[GRUNTING]

-[EXCLAIMS]
-[SQUEAKING]

Who're you?

[SQUEAKING]

Whoa! Oh, h*, h*, h*!

[SQUEAKING]

h*, h*, h*?

[SQUEAKING]

Uh...

Yikes!

[SQUEAKING]

[WHISPERS] Squeaks,
that's not Santa Claus.

[SQUEAKING]

Fine, fine.
I take it. I take it.

[SQUEAKING]

Oh, h*, h*, h*, h*.

[SQUEAKING]

[SQUEAKS GIGGLING]

[SQUEAKING]

Uh-oh. This isn't good.

If that letter doesn't
get to the real Santa,
Squeaks will be crushed.

I have to get
that letter back.

What is this?
Is coupon, is treasure map,
a very thin baklava?

[CRUNCHING]

Ugh, so dry.

Maybe tissue.

Oh, well.

I take, so I keep.

[GROANS] Hey!

Give back my pal's letter.

Letter?
Is that what this is?

Give it back, or I have
another snowball
with your name on it.

Ha. That was no snowball.

This is snowball.

Yikes! [GROANING]

[CRASHING]

Barbarian is so uncivilized.

Hurry up, Krakos.
We still have much to taste
before nightfall.

Barby wants to play, huh?

This ought to do the trick.

Got to line it up just right.

-[TREMORS]
- Whoa.

How's that for a snowball?

-[LAUGHING] Rabbit.
I do the taking.
-[GRUNTING]

- That letter is mine.
- Oh, yeah?

- Yeah.
-[SCREAMING]

- I rung his bell, no?
-[GROWLING]

-[BELL CHIMING]
- BUGS: Ringing the bell.

Ringing the bell
for donations.

Won't you be able
to donate a little something
for the holidays?

Spare change,
letters to Santa.

I don't give, I take.

- I was counting on that.
-[SNAPPING]

[SCREAMING]

[LAUGHING]

Go and find him,
you dumb bear.
[GRUNTS]

[GROWLING]

[SCOFFS]

[SNIFFING]

[GRUNTS]

[BOPS NOSE]

-[WHISTLES]
-[PANTING]

[GROWLING]

- Huh? No...
-[KRAKOS EXCLAIMING]

[CRASHING]

[GIGGLING] Hello, mastodon.

Huh, who are you, fancy lady?

I'm Christmas Carol.

Would you care to hear
a holiday classic?

Do you know the one,
filled with false
and unrealistic expectations?

[VOCALIZING]

That's it.
[CHUCKLES]

♪ Squeaks had a letter
You took the letter

[GROANS]

♪ So I took the letter
Now you have no letter

♪ You're such a pro
At being slow

♪ Why don't you go
Sit in the snow

-♪ I took the letter
-♪ You should know better

-♪ Give me the letter
-♪ No I will never

♪ Letter, letter, letter
Letter, letter

♪ You will never ever
Get the letter

♪ Why do you keep
Hitting yourself?

♪ Gah, okay, I'll stop

♪ Wait, just one more

♪ Ding, dong, ding

♪ Dong ♪

[GROANS]

♪ Bong ♪

What a ding-dong.

[THUD]

[SHOUTS]

[GRUNTING]

Oh, fresh.
Shall we dance?

[SCREAMING] Whoa!

What a Neanderthal.

I might be down,
but I'm not out.

- I take.
- What the...

Ha-ha.

Pretty fast for a big guy, no?

[SNIFFS] Mmm,
something smells good.

Get your hotdogs here.
Get your hotdogs.

[CHUCKLES] One, please.

Ah, would you look at that?

I have no paper left
to wrap them up.

You wouldn't happen to have
some on you, would you?

A newspaper,
or, an envelope, perhaps?

- Like this?
- That will do.

Wait a second.

You!
Rabbit, no more tricks.

Like this old chestnut.

Oh.
[SCREAMING]

This ends now, rabbit.
[GRUNTING]

I wouldn't do that,
if I were you.

Oh, yeah.
Why not?

Because you're on thin ice,
doc.

Er, oh.

Huh, huh.
[SCREAMING]

Turkish delight!

Oh, don't you know
that around the holidays,

it's better to give
than to receive.

[LAUGHING]

There we go.
That's Squeaks'.

A letter to Santa.
Isn't that cute?

- SANTA: h* h* h*!
-[GASPS]

h* h* h* h*!

If you'll excuse me,
I have a letter to write.

[MEN VOCALIZING]