03x15 - Regatta de Rabbit/When Irish Eyes are Swinin'

[bunniefuu]

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

BUGS: Smell that
fresh ocean air, Squeaks.

(SIGHS) It's a perfect day

for another
Ricotta Frittata Regatta.

- Never heard of it.
- What?

You never heard of
the Ricotta Frittata Regatta?

Why, it's only the greatest
sailboat race of all time!

Five and a half miles
of adrenaline-packed hoisting,

jibbing and masting.

And I'm a three-time champion.

- CECIL: Oh, really?
- Huh?

Well, I'm a six-time champion.

Nailed it.

You ain't winning
this year, Cecil.

I've been sailing all summer,

and I've got a boat
that's in tip-top shape.

(CRACKS)

Uh, glue that back on for me,
will you, Squeaks?

Okay.

Yeah, you've got me
shaking in my shell.

Not really.
I was being sarcastic.

ANNOUNCER: (OVER PA)
Sailors, get ready.

Let the race begin.

Well, as soon as
the wind picks up.

Bugs.

Cecil.

ANNOUNCER: And away they go.

Sorry, Cecil,
but thanks to my big sail,

winning this race
will be a breeze.

Actually, Bugs,
I have a bigger sail.

So it's time for me
to "wave" goodbye.

(SPLASH)

I need more sail.

- Squeaks.
- Huh?

- Get my dirty laundry.
-(GRUMBLES)

Now hoist my underpants.
Raise up my tube socks.

- BUGS: Present
my tighty-whities.
- Phew.

I'm gonna make sure
this race is brief.

-(LAUGHS)
-(PANTING)

CECIL: I prefer boxers.

And I prefer
an industrial-strength fan.

(WIND BLOWING)

- CECIL: And I prefer
a leaf blower.
-(HORN BLARING)

That's it!

Squeaks, get the badger.

Aye, aye, Captain.

- Fire at will.
-(BADGER GRUNTING)

Oh, wow, Cecil,
has your sail been
working out?

'Cause it looks ripped.

Oh, no, I sure hope
you don't find out about
my secret shortcut.

(CHIRPING)

You mean
this secret shortcut?

-(LAUGHING) Too late.
-(WHISTLES)

Good luck, Bugs.

Not really.
I was being sarcastic.

BUGS: You'll never catch me.

(BUGS SCREAMS)

Hey, I'm not a baby.
Put me down!

- Aw! (CRYING)
-(SQUEAKS LAUGHING)

Huh?

(CRYING LOUDLY)

Aw, gee, I'm sorry.
But I'm not your baby.

But, this boat is my baby,

and it needs a diaper
really bad.

Ooh!

(LAUGHS EXCITEDLY)

Ooh!

BUGS: I outsmarted you
again, Cecil.

I'm going to need
some reinforcements.

(HORN TOOTING)

ALL: Hup, hup, hup, hup, hup.

And stroke, stroke,
stroke, stroke.

Touche, terrapin.

Well, if Cecil
can use his friends,
then so can I.

- Squeaks, you've got friends,
call them up.
-(GRUMBLING)

(WHISTLES)

Come aboard!

All right, stroke, stroke,

- stroke, stroke.
-(GRUNTING)

- BUGS: Stroke, stroke, stroke.
-(PANTING)

Aw, come on,
put some muscle into it.

♪ I'm kicking it here
on my yacht

♪ My sailing skills
are super hot

♪ I only take cash
never a check

♪ Mess with me
I'll make you swab
the poop deck ♪

He's so c*ck, he's making
his own music video
during the race.

♪ You may think
I don't move very fast

♪ But watch me climb up
on this mast

♪ Can you feel
my chill vibe, yo?

♪ Now, eat my wake
as I say jibe-h*

ALL:
♪ Jibe-h*, jibe-h*, jibe-h* ♪

-(SQUEAKS YELLING)
- Whoa.

Nobody jibe-h*'s Bugs Bunny.

We need more speed.

Squeaks, it looks like
we're gonna have to
lighten the load.

(ALL SCREAM)

(SQUEAKING ANGRILY)

Desperate times
call for desperate measures.

BUGS: Time to go full pirate.

Prepare to get your
shivers timbered.

Abandon ship.

You're not the only one
who can go full pirate.

(GROWLS)

(GROWLS)

(BOTH GROWLING)

(BOTH YELLING)

(BOTH GROWLING)

- A-ha!
-(BUGS YELLS)

(YELPS) My booty!

Time to bring out
the big g*ns.

Two can play at that game.

ANNOUNCER: (OVER PA)
And the winner of the
Ricotta Frittata Regatta is,

-those guys.
-(ALL CHEERING)

What? Those guys won?
Well, I don't care who won.

- As long as I beat you.
- Oh, no, you don't.

BOTH: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

(SQUEAKING)

Yeah, I get it.
All our chances of winning...

Just went down the drain.

(LAUGHING)

♪ Hoity-toity
toity, toity, toi ♪

What? My luck is all empty.

How did that-- (SCREAMS)

(GRUNTS)

I gotta check
me luck statement.

Zero balance?
Sweet Axl of the Roses.

Shameless O'Scanty
is out of luck.

(THUNDERCLAP)

- I have to get
some luck, quick.
-(BEEPING)

Oh, here we go. A pig.

It says here, if you bring
a pig inside your home,

you'll have great luck.

Faith and begorrah!
That's what I'll do!

I'll find meself a pig
and trap him in me house.

Oh, who am I kidding?

I'll never see a pig
just wandering around Ireland.

Excuse me,

are the Cliffs of Moher
around here?

I'm sight-seeing.

- They're that way.
- Thank you.

And, uh, top
of the (STUTTERING) morning...

Have a good day.

What a nice pig.

Wait! Pig?

I'm gonna capture that pig
and trap him in me house.

Then I'll have more luck
than a lucky horse shoe
made of lucky rabbit's feet.

- Wow, a seashell?
-(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

Is there anything
(STUTTERS) more exciting?

Now, time to swoop down
and cork that pork.

Just need to wait
for that gentle Irish breeze.

(SCREAMING)

- Oi!
- Oh, look, an old Irish kite.

It's been a while
since I've flown one of these.

(GROANS) Oi, what happened?

(STUTTERING)
This reminds me
of a simpler, gentler time.

(YELPS) Oi!

I wonder if I can still do
some old tricks.

The bicycle.

(SCREAMS) Ouch!

The sh**ting star.

Oi!

The dodecahedron.

(YELPING)

They say
if you listen closely,

- you can hear voice
of the Irish winds.
-(SHAMELESS YELPING)

- Let me go! (YELPS)
- Wait, I think
I'm hearing it now.

SHAMELESS: Help!

Oh, this will do the trick.

First I'll catch him
in me rope trap.

Then I'll beat the nice pig
with me trusty shillelagh.

Easy-peasy, potato-greasy.

PORKY: (STUTTERING)
What beautiful day.

SHAMELESS: Here he comes.

Oh, my goodness! Irish moss.
Be still my heart.

-(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)
-(GRUNTING)

Oh, look, this must be a
traditional Irish Blarney rope

I've heard so much about.

The legend says
you have to pull it
for good luck.

(SHAMELESS YELPING)

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

(GROANING) My kilt is in me...

Uh, what's this?
A second Irish Blarney rope?

(SHAMELESS YELPING)

And an Irish pinata?

(SIGHS) Oh,
this is my lucky day.

(SHAMELESS YELPING)

- Oh, those Irish winds again.
-(SHAMELESS SCREAMING)

(LAUGHS) No one can resist
a sheep shearing.

That pig will soon be mine!

Sheep shearing?

I didn't see that on the
(STUTTERING) itiner...
On the schedule.

Well, when in Ireland.

Got ya!

My, you're
a friendly sheep. (LAUGHS)

I'm gonna shear you first.

Oh, (YELPING) help me,
Saint Duff of the McKagans.

I bet you feel cooler
without all that hot wool.

Oh, although looking at you,
I can see why you wear it.

(TEETH CHATTERING)

A flag?

This is too much excitement
for one day.

Boy, am I glad
I paid extra for that
(STUTTERING) lucky package.

Oh, there he is.
The king of the castle.

Taking pictures
with his wee little camera.

What the...

An even bigger flag?
(GASPS EXCITEDLY)

Best day ever!

Well, this little piggy
is going to go wee, wee, wee,

- all the way
to my home... (SCREAMS)
-(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

-(CRASH)
-(YELPING)

Saint Slash of the Top Hat!

Oh, no, I broke
at least a thousand mirrors.

That's like,
7,000 years bad luck.

Oh, Shameless, it's hopeless.

You know what?

I'm gonna go against
all me instincts
as a leprechaun

and try being civil
and polite.

Please, Mr. Pig,
from the bottom
of my rotten little heart,

I've fallen on hard times
and I need you to come
into my home,

to replenish me luck.

- Sure.
- Really?

All I had to do was ask?

I went through
all that for nothing?

- Pretty much, yeah.
-(SIGHS) Oh.

Never mind. To me house.

Here we are.
Oh, right in here, Mr. Pig.

Me luck is going to be
off the charts.

(PORKY GRUNTING)

PORKY: I'm stuck.

Oh, for the love of
Bonnie bee's nest
in a blimey, bloody...

- Get your lucky keister
in there!
-(PORKY YELPING)

(GRUNTING)

(SCREAMING)

- Huh? (GASPS)
- Oh, look, an Irish pinata.

-(THUDDING)
-(SHAMELESS YELPING)

- Wow, I can still hear
those Irish winds.
- SHAMELESS: Oh, come on!

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)