03x06 - I Am the Walrus

[bunniefuu]

[announcer] The following program
is closed-captioned

and has been recommended for viewing
by the American Federation of Teachers

and the National Education Association.

[mellow music playing]

Boy, Dinah, I hope you had
a better day than I had.

[Dinah meows]

Look at this.

It's an invitation for my parents
to come to Open House at school

so they can meet our new principal.

[sighs] She's coming over
from a school across town,

and I heard she's really strict.

Mrs. Harrison, our last principal,
was so nice.

I'm not gonna have any fun this year

if this new principal is as mean
as everyone says.

Well, at least there's one place I can go
that's always fun.

[theme music playing]

♪ Hold on to your seat
Let's go for a ride ♪

♪ Now that we're here on the other side ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ It's a curious place
With a wonderful crew ♪

♪ And you're never quite sure
What they will do ♪

♪ Use your imagination
You'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

Hi, Mr. Hatter. Mr. Hare.

This is terrible!

Completely terrible.
Perfectly terrible. Terribly terrible.

-What's terrible?
-The news!

It's terrible news!

What is it about the news that's so bad?

-Everything about it!
-Everything about it!

Have you guys heard the bad news?
Isn't it just terrible?

What? What's the problem?
Someone please tell me.

Can't you see, Alice?
I'm sure it's written all over my face.

-Oh! It looks like you washed it off.
-Ah, then let me explain.

A wal... A wal...

A walrus is moving to Wonderland.

A walrus. Why is that bad?

Believe me, you don't want to know.

-No, ma'am. Uh-uh.
-[all chattering]

Yes, I do!

Oh. Well, why didn't you say so?

Walruses are terrible creatures!

I've heard
the most awful things about them.

I've heard they smell like old seaweed.

I've heard they talk
with their mouths full

and even burp out loud.

Can you imagine such terrible manners?

I've heard they always lie.

Walruses make up stories
about things that aren't real.

A walrus will tell you your shoe's untied
when it's not, but you look down anyway,

and everyone laughs at you
because you fell for that old trick.

Gee, you guys know a lot about walruses.

[all speaking at once]

I guess you've all met them before.

-Eh--
-Uh...

Oh, well... no, not actually.
Not in person.

But who would want to?

Everyone says, "Beware the walrus."

♪ There is one thing for sure
That you don't want to meet ♪

♪ In your house, down the road
On the boat or in the street ♪

♪ Walruses are bad
That's how the story goes ♪

♪ We've been told by those
Who were told by those who know too ♪

♪ Beware the walrus, beware the walrus ♪

♪ I hear that walruses lie
And they smell really rank ♪

♪ That they're dumb and they're cruel
They belong in a fish tank ♪

♪ We don't want
Any walrus here in Wonderland ♪

♪ We've heard all about them
And we clearly understand so ♪

♪ Beware the walrus, beware the walrus ♪

♪ Who cares if we've never seen one? ♪

♪ We've been told
They're really bad news ♪

And now more of Disney's
Adventures in Wonderland.

[indistinct chatter]

All right, listen up!
I've made my decision.

If the walrus wants to live here,
that's fine with me.

We're not going to exclude him.

Your Majesty, are you kidding?

I don't think she's kidding.

Wonderland is open to everyone.

Whatever this walrus may be like,
you'll just have to learn to live with it.

[indistinct chatter]

-Is that your final decision?
-Yes!

Wonderland has always been
a friendly place.

And as long as I'm queen,
it's going to stay friendly,

whether you like it or not.

What was that--? Okay, here.

So we all agree.

If the queen won't do anything about
the walrus, then it's up to us.

-The only question is, what do we do?
-That's a good question.

Thanks.
I felt pretty good about it myself.

-[indistinct chatter]
-[bangs gavel]

I'm not so sure I want to just walk up
to the walrus and call it names

-or tell it to go away, you know?
-I agree. That seems pretty mean.

No, we're not like that.
We're all very nice, don't you think?

-I'm a very nice guy...
-[overlapping chatter]

Just make the walrus want
to live somewhere else

without actually doing anything to it.

After all, if it feels unliked
and unappreciated and unwelcome,

well, then maybe it will want to stay out.

Maybe we don't have
to do anything to the walrus.

Maybe we should not do things.

-Oh! You mean, like not speak to it.
-Or not invite it to your tea parties.

Or not tell it about anchovy night
at the Wonderland pizza parlor.

Right, or not invite it to the queen's
garden party this afternoon.

We should exclude it from all our parties.

Of course, by not telling it
about the queen's party,

we aren't being mean, are we?

Not us. I mean,
we might be a little not nice,

but we never mean to be mean.

No way, we wouldn't do that.

-Us, be mean? Not possible.
-That's right.

Because after all...

[all] We're not like that.

No. No we're not.

[Walrus humming]

Oh, yes. Yes, indeed,
we are most definitely lost.

Oh! Ah, beg your pardon.

Ma'am... beg your pardon.

Capital, capital. Much better.

-[Walrus chuckles]
-[sniffs]

Are you the walrus?

Oh, most definitely.

And we have a question for you.
Oh, no. Check that, two questions.

-Okay.
-One: is this Wonderland?

And two: would you,
by any chance, be the queen?

[chitters]

Well, this is Wonderland.

Uh, but I'm not the queen.

[sighs]

-My name is Alice.
-Well,

we are pleased to meet you, Alice.

[lighthearted music playing]

Nice to meet you too, Mr. Walrus.

[chuckles] Capital, capital.
So this is Wonderland!

Such a very friendly place.
We are quite pleased.

Why do you keep saying "we"?

Hm? Oh, gracious, where are my manners?
I'll introduce you.

Alice, this is my very best friend,
Pinniped.

Pinniped, Alice.

Um...

I don't see anyone.

Well, to be honest,
Pinniped hasn't been feeling well.

He's lost all the color from his face,

and there was very little of that
to begin with

since, of course, he's invisible.

Oh, I see.

I mean, I don't see. No offense.

But are you sure you're not stretching
the truth just a little?

Stretching the truth?
You mean, making it all up?

[laughs]

That's a good one, Alice.

Oh, yes, Pinniped, she is a humorous girl.

Oh, by the way, Alice, your shoe's untied.

I'm not falling for that old--

-Oh, I guess it is.
-[chuckles]

I must say, I must say.

I hope everyone in Wonderland is
as friendly as you, Alice.

You make us feel right at home.

♪ It's a pleasure to meet you ♪

♪ We are feeling more at ease ♪

♪ Seems that life here
Might just be a breeze ♪

♪ We were a little queasy
Coming to this foreign place ♪

♪ Sometimes it's not easy
Being a brand-new face ♪

♪ Everyone's told me
That this town's a friendly one ♪

♪ I think that we'll fit in ♪

♪ And have a lot of fun ♪

♪ People say it's nice here
If you listen to what they say ♪

♪ So I know it's just silly
To feel this way ♪

♪ Yes, we're new in town
We just got here ♪

♪ So we're new in town ♪

♪ You're both very welcome
Hope you plan to settle down ♪

♪ I think we'll like it here
We're new in town ♪

[Walrus] Oh, look at this!

What better way
to get acquainted with the place

than to read its newspaper?

-Look, it's a special walrus edition.
-Oh, why so it is. [laughs]

What a friendly place.

[gasps]

That's odd. Very odd.

-Wouldn't you say so, Pinniped?
-What's the matter?

Listen to these headlines.
"Walrus housing in short supply."

"Three out of four walruses
dislike Wonderland weather."

Gee, I've never heard those things before.

Oh, my goodness!

It certainly makes it sound like
this isn't the place we'd like to live.

Maybe we shouldn't move here, Pinniped.

Wonderland is wonderful. You just need
to meet the people who live here.

Come on, I'll introduce you
to all my friends.

It's almost 4:00,
and the queen's having a garden party.

Well, they'll all be there.

Party? But we haven't been invited.

It might be rude to go
without an invitation.

Well, then you can be my guest.
Or guests. Please.

What do you think? Hm? Perhaps so.

All right, we'll come.

-Thank you for asking us, Alice.
-It's my pleasure.

Meet me at the palace in an hour.
It was great meeting you, Mr. Walrus.

-Oh, and you too, Mr. Pinniped. Bye.
-[chuckles]

[announcer] Disney's Adventures
in Wonderland will be back after this.

And now more of Disney's
Adventures in Wonderland.

[indistinct chatter]

Excuse me. I beg your pardon.

I am the Walrus.

Hi, Mr. Walrus. Come meet all my friends.

This is the Queen of Hearts.

Oh! We are honored, Your Majesty.

-"We"?
-I'll explain later.

Enjoy the party, Walrus. [chuckles]

Oh, look at that. I forgot my party shoes.

Excuse me, I'll be right back.

Let me introduce you to everyone else.

This is Mr. Rabbit.

The March Hare, Mr. Dum, Mr. Dee,
and the Mad Hatter.

Everyone, this is Mr. Walrus.

So wonderful to be here.

It's certainly a thrill--

So happy to meet you.

"We"? I knew it.
Let one walrus in and more will follow.

No. He means his invisible friend,
Mr. Pinniped.

Invisible friend?
Don't tell me you believe that, Alice.

Listen, I have to go.
I've got some crumpets in the oven.

Yes, I have some weeds in my carrot patch.

We need to catch up on coupons to clip.

[Queen laughing]

Hey, where did everybody go?

They all said they had things to do.

What could they have to do
that's more important than staying here?

Actually, I think they left because of me.

I'm sorry, Your Majesty.
I apologize for ruining the party.

I never should have come to Wonderland.

No, wait. Please don't go.

Hold it right there, buster!

No one walks out on one of my parties.

You're staying right here
and having fun, that's an order.

But... I've caused enough trouble already.

It's not you.

It's the rest of my subjects
that are the problem.

Well, if they don't want to attend a party
with a walrus, they'll get their wish.

[clears throat]

I hereby decree that from now on,

only walruses and their friends
may attend my parties.

Come on, Alice,
we need to put up a few signs

before we go on with the party.

This is strange.
Why is the courtyard locked up?

Can't you read the signs?

"Private party. No Rabbits,
no Hatters, no Hares"?

"And no Tweedles allowed."

Only walruses
and their friends may attend.

And it's your loss.

The food at this party is
the best I've ever had.

[all clamoring]

Now, who wants cherry cheesecake?
It's from an old royal recipe.

Boy, the food does look good.

Especially that cheesecake.

Yeah. Well, I'm sure
Her Majesty won't mind

if I just go in and bring
a little something out for everyone.

Rabbit!

Take one more step
and you'll be one sorry bunny.

I think we'll just go back.

I still feel funny about this.

-Your Majesty, I don't mind--
-Well, I do mind.

This is my party, and if I want
to exclude someone, I'll do it.

I don't get it. Why is the queen
excluding us from the party

and letting the walrus stay?

Is there something wrong with us?

Please, Your Majesty,
why won't you let us join in the fun?

For no good reason at all.

Just because you're you.

But it's not fair.

He's right, Your Majesty, it's not fair.
Please, let them in.

Why? They didn't want you around.

Now the shoe is on the other foot.

I know, I got dressed
in a hurry this morning.

That's not what I mean.

I mean, now you know
what it's like to be treated unfairly.

The way you treated the walrus.

You really should just talk to him,
he's very nice.

I'll say, and he spoke up for all of you,
even though you wanted to exclude him.

I guess we were pretty unfair.

How true that is.

Can you ever forgive us, Mr. Walrus?

Well, of course. Of course!
No hard feelings.

And I don't know
if you've ever heard this about walruses,

but we never hold a grudge.

That's okay. Now that we're friends,
we'll hold it for you.

So, Your Majesty, does this mean
everyone can join the party?

Since everyone is now a friend
of the walrus, why not?

It's about time we gave him
a proper Wonderland welcome.

[rock music playing]

♪ Clap your hands and stomp your feet ♪

♪ The time has come for us
To properly greet ♪

♪ Sound the horns, beat the drum ♪

♪ Let's give a Wonderland welcome ♪

♪ You'll have some fun here
Week after week ♪

♪ The land of Wonder is very unique ♪

-♪ Cats may vanish ♪
-♪ Tea cups may spin ♪

♪ Your invisible friend
Will fit right in ♪

♪ Clap your hands, stomp your feet ♪

♪ The time has come for us
To properly greet ♪

♪ Sound the horns, beat the drum ♪

♪ Let's give a Wonderland welcome ♪

♪ I thank you for extending your hand ♪

♪ We can see now why
It's such a wonderful land ♪

♪ You make a stranger feel
Like a good friend ♪

♪ We're really looking forward
To the good times we'll spend ♪

♪ Clap your hands, stomp your feet ♪

♪ The time has come for us
To properly greet ♪

♪ Sound the horns, beat the drum ♪

♪ Let's give a Wonderland welcome ♪

[announcer] Disney's Adventures
in Wonderland will be back after this.

[upbeat music playing]

You know, Dinah, I was thinking,

even though kids were saying
our new principal's supposed to be mean,

it's not right to think that about her
before I've even met her.

I think I should give her a chance.

-[dog barking]
-Oh.

And maybe you should give
the dog next door chance.

If you get to know him,
he might be really nice.

[dog barks]

Well, maybe.

[theme music playing]

♪ That's all for now
But we'll see you again ♪

♪ Come back real soon
Now that we're all friends ♪

♪ Where every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme and a dance or two ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventures in Wonderland ♪